Hey :)(: Hope this chapter doesn't confuse you at all. If it does please let me know. Thanks :) x

"Lilly, I'm sorry, I love you," Oliver spoke softly.
"No!" I screamed. He tried to grab my arm, but I pulled away, "Don't you dare even touch me."
"Lilly, it was a mistake!"
"A mistake which you made with my BEST FRIEND! " tears were pouring from my eyes.
"I don't love her but."
"Oh, so you just sleep with her for no reason?"
"No.."
"Then Why Oliver? Why?!?!" I screamed as loud as my lungs could.
"Because, because, I wanted to take a risk,"
"What kind of excuse is that?!" I slapped him hard on the face, but he pulled me in for a kiss. I moved away. "Unlike you, I don't take risks."*
I walked out.

At the age of 18, I was a wimp. I prefered to play things by the book. I thought, if you don't take risks, at least you wouldn't lose. Well, 15 years later and it finally occurred to me, if you don't take risks, you won't lose, but you won't win either. My mind kept flashing back to when I left Oliver. I remember hearing the door slam behind me, that was the end.

My eyes scanned the internet page in front of me. The next flight to Florida was tomorrow morning. I had the right grades to get in college there, I had the right amount of money, all I had to do was press the 'confirm' button. Was this the right thing to do? Was this the right way to go. I looked around my room. I saw a picture of Oliver, Miley and I hanging on my wall. It was in a expensive, glass frame my dad had bought me. He said it needed that, it was a special photo. Usually, I would look at it after we got into our silly arguments and say "They'll always be my best friends." This time, I walked over, threw it and watched as it smashed to pieces. I walked back to my computer and pressed 'confirm'.

Nothing was ever straight forward in my life. Whenever something seemed to be perfect, something always had to spoil it. I'd sort something out, then another 'mess' would come along. Most times, Oliver would be this 'mess', with the face of a beauty. I loved him, but he cheated on me. David loved me, but I cheated on him. I could now confirm, my life was a 'mess'.

"Would all passengers boarding flight 364BC1 (A/N random letters and numbers. don't know what flight numbers are meant to be.) to Stanford, Florida, please make their way to to gate 16."
Man, was I really about to do this. I was leaving so much behind. If I got into this flight, I would have to start all over again. Make new friends, build a reputation. My phone beeped and I looked down and read 'Lilly, love you aaf. don't forget, don't move on. O. x'. That was it. I didn't want to be with Oliver anymore. I had to move on.

I pulled myself up and sat on the bench again. I looked around. No one was about. Just me, sitting there by myself while tears flew down my face. Why had I done any of this? Why had I put myself in this situation. Why wasn't away sorting it out? Why? Because I didn't want to. I didn't want to live.

I looked out the window to see the clouds float away as the airoplane passed them. The sky behind them was completely blue. I was never keen on airoplanes, but seeing this made it worth it. I pugged in my ipod and watched the world below me. It got me thinking about my life and everything I had been through. From up here, everything seemed perfect, but as the wheels hit the ground on that airport runway, it all changed.

When I was young, I used to have a secret place where I would go if I was sad. As weird as it may sound, this secret place with sitting under a huge tree in my back garden. Of course, it was hidden so no one would know I was there. Whatever was going on in my life, I would sit under there, watch my still garden, and my problems would fanish. As I got older, it's 'magic' stopped, and my problems were stuck with me the whole time. I searched and searched for a new secret place. Somewhere I could go, all day, any day. I searched high and low, until I eventually found it, but it wasn't a place anymore, it was Oliver. If I ever had a problem, I would go to him. He would comfort me the best he could. He would help me out if I was ever stuck. He was my saviour when life was tough. Now, he was the least person I wanted to go too. If only I had my secret place.

"Hey there." I looked up to see a young man stand behind me. I was sitting on the grass at a park in Florida. "Hi, I replied."
"You ok?" he asked. He seemed very nice.
"I suppose."
"I'm David," he held out his hand for me to shake.
"Lilly."
"You new here?"
"Yeah, I'm about to start college here."
"Yeah? Me too."
I smiled, maybe making new friends wasn't so hard after all.

I started school with no friends. I was a young outcast I suppose. I was quiet and would rather sit and draw myself than go anywhere near the other kids who were playing ball games. My mom kept telling mee all I had to say was Hi, and then maybe they would talk back. Eventually I was sick of being on my own, so took my mom's tip and say hi to a small, geeky kid who sat and watched as the others played, dreaming that could be him. Oliver Oken. He and I soon became best friends and built up the courage to go play with the other kids but that day was special for us and the rest was just history.

I imagined if David had never said Hi to me. Would I have stayed in Florida? Or would someone other young guy come, sweep me of my feet and save me from evil. The worse thing is, I would never know. Would life be better if I had just ignored him that day. Ok, that would be rude, but I would be in a better place than I was right now. Or would I just be in the same mess with another guy.

"Lilly, I really like you," David told me, a few months after we met.
"I don't think you're half bad either." I joked.
He looked me in the eyes, then placed his lips softly on mine. I loved it. He made me feel so special.
"David, I have something to tell you, and I'm sorry."
"What is it?"
After only knowing a guy for a few months, having a baby with him was not a good idea, but it couldn't be helped.
"I'm pregnant."
He nodded, thinking about it then smiled, "I love you Lilly Truscott."

I closed my eyes. If I had known that Melissa was Oliver's child, would I have flown back then. If only I had, things wouldn't be so difficult. Oliver wouldn't have had his kids yet, or he wouldn't have been married to Claire. If only I knew that then.

"Lilly, our daughter is beautiful," I smiled at David's comment. He was so right. Our daughter was so beautiful.
"Melissa Truscott?" he asked.
"Yeah."
"Or... Melissa Smith."
I stayed silent "Lilly, will you become my Mrs Smith," he paused pulling out a ring, "Will you marry me."
"Yes!"

When Oliver and I were eight, we planned our wedding. This was before Miley came, so it was just two. We decided to practice, so got our teddy bears to watch. Oliver's best man was his fluffy dog named Dougie (A/N like my brothers. lol. )and my maid of honour was my tweenie doll, Fizz (A/N anyone watch the Tweenies, or was that a British thing? :S). Of course, we never kissed. At the age of eight, that was disgusting. We held hands though. At this point I didn't love Oliver yet, but I knew that this was how my life would be.

I felt a pat on my leg and looked down to see my one year old below me.
"Oh, here baby." I picked her up. She noticed tears on my cheeks and tried to wipe them, but it turned into more of a hit.
"Mel, what will I do?"
I looked at a photo of Oliver and I.
"Da."
"Dad?" I said in shock, that was her first word. Dad. "Yeah I'll marry Dad."

I thought back to the night before my wedding. This was the time I thought about most. This was my big decision. Dad, Melissa said. I thought David was her dad. If only I had known the truth.

If only I knew the truth now. If only I knew which way to go or what do to. If only I knew why. Why did this have to happen to me? If only I knew who I was meant to be with. I closed my eyes. We will be lead to the person we are meant to be with, right?. Please, just lead me there now. Please hurry. Please take me to him. Now?