Disclaimer:I own nothing and make no money from this. Rumiko Takahashi and viz media own all rights to Inuyasha. So without further ado, go support the official anime and manga, of which I definitely DON'T own.
Japanese terms:
Densenbyou: Infectious/contagious disease/epidemic
Daiyoukai: great demon
Hanyou: Half demon
Houshi: Monk
Inu: Dog
Miko: Priestess
Ningen: Human
Onna: Girl
Ookami: Wolf
Taijiya: Slayer
Youkai: Demon(I use this term to describe demonic auras and if I use it otherwise, it is when I use the term 'lesser youkai' which are the bull-crap weak demons Naraku always uses.)
Inspiration Note:
'Dry every tear in my eye
You can tell me why
This is our secret place
Outer space, outer space
Our home forever is, outer space
Black stars and endless seas, outer space
New hope, new destinies; outer space
Forever we'll be in
Outer Space, outer space' - Cosmos(Outer Space) by T.a.T.u.
H&DR
Inuyasha was standing near the back of the great hall. He made his way to another guard who was posted back there. He had been introduced to them a few weeks ago, but he didn't have to remember their names. Not yet anyway.
Very soon, they would be rotated. The end of a lot of the contracts were up. The older of the guards would retire with hefty sums of gold and silver with quarters in the city if they so choose. Some people would choose to stay on as a guard and others would leave to start or be with their families. Those that passed guardsman training would finally get to rotate into the trials in which they would again be tested since their previous training. Only the elite would be chosen.
The guards were much more strong than anyone in the military. When Inuyasha had questioned about why the army doesn't get such quality training as the guards, it turned out as a way to reduce spies. This was a time of war. Anyone could join the military, but only those of nobility could become a guard and they were carefully handpicked and selected. They would be questioned and then an investigation would be placed on them. They would interview their friends and family, and even their enemies. Then the person of nobility would have to train for ten years and wait for the next contract to be lifted.
It could take at very least, twenty-five years. Inuyasha stopped thinking about all of the qualifications as he was approaching his destination. He was thinking about it all because he would soon have to help choose the new guards. He was nervous. He seemed to get a pass on all of these things, becoming a Commander so easily. He felt like a wolf in sheep's clothing. He could not even read. He didn't understand why Hirigana chose him.
"Hey, ya know your route, right?" Inuyasha questioned as he finally reached the guard.
"Yes sir, I'm going to make my way to route 'F' and trade posts, then route 'G', to trade posts again, then back here on route 'E'." He explained. Inuyasha nodded as he flashed a smile to him.
"Alright and remember, no drinking. That's the most important thing." Inuyasha commanded. The guard nodded.
"Alright, carry on," Inuyasha stated. This was the last guard he had to check up on. Now he was supposed to just kind of do his own thing and check up on the guards every now and again and report back to Hirigana until he started turning human since it was the night of the new moon. Once he started changing, he would go back to his quarters to rest for the night and the Senior Veteran Guard would take the lead for the rest of the night.
He started towards Hirigana once her reached the great hall, but when he found him, he was conversing with the Northern Lord who had arrived early this morning, with his mate and cubs. Inuyasha didn't want to interrupt their conversation, so he went towards the food that was laid out on tables that risen highly so that those standing could get their food more easily. He didn't bother grabbing a rectangular wooden plate. He grabbed a cloth napkin and used chopsticks to grab at a few different cooked slices of meat, along with some different vegetables. He ate carrot after steamed carrot from his napkin as he walked away.
People had begun to arrive and he was staring at the different demons who were now there. Some were beautiful, dazzling in fabrics made of the finest silks and their hair done up in strange, fancy ornaments that were as big as the demoness's heads. others were strange. He had even seen a demon whose garments were made of some sort of absorbent material. slime dripped off the demon. It constantly had to be wiped up and maintained. It had been the most unusual demon Inuyasha had seen yet.
He had continued watching the guests arrive when he saw a wolf demon come in. A seriously funny looking wolf. Koga looked ridiculous. His hair was let down and combed, it looked weird with his thick eyebrows and he wore a kimono of brown, red, and black. It was plain other than the swirl of colors. However, seeing him in proper wear was somehow hilarious to Inuyasha. The hanyou smirked as he downed the rest of his food, a couple of pieces of pork and beef. After swallowing the food down and pocketing his napkin, he began towards the wolf demon.
"Koga, hey, what's up?" Inuyasha couldn't help his chuckle as he looked the wolf up and down.
"Inuyasha!?" Koga stared at the him, obviously shocked. Inuyasha was not only clad in official southern armor, but it also showed his rank of commander upon it.
"Commander Inuyasha?" Koga questioned with a smirk reaching his face. Inuyasha squinted his eyes for a second.
"Yup." He said.
"But... You're not of noble blood." Koga began to say as he looked to be thinking. Inuyasha was about to open his mouth and gloat, but Koga seemed to have a realization.
"Sesshomaru is your brother, so your a prince..." He stated as he figured it all out.
"So, where is Kagome?" Koga finally asked and Inuyasha frowned at that.
"With Sesshomaru," Inuyasha said as he made a slightly disgruntled look, his eyes casting downward as folds in his forehead appeared. Koga stared at him for a second.
"Wait, wait, wait... Why the hell is Kagome with Sesshomaru?" Koga began to get upset. He clenched his fists and his gaze became a heated glare. Inuyasha crossed his arms and his eyebrows furrowed.
"She has become Alpha Bitch of the West," Inuyasha stated. Koga shook his head.
"Alpha Bitch... Why is Kagome Alpha Bitch!? Of the West? It makes no damn sense!" Koga insisted. Inuyasha didn't take lightly to how Koga was acting.
"Now you listen up, Sesshomaru asked Kagome to become part of his pack and she wanted to go with him too. You have obviously found out who he really is, you know how much stronger he is." Inuyasha explained. Koga shook his head.
"The Western Lord hates humans and you let him take Kagome!" Koga yelled, causing the people around them to stare. Inuyasha shushed him, he didn't want a scene to be made.
"I don't know why, but he likes Kagome. He doesn't treat her bad, just like that little girl he has." Inuyasha said. Koga stood there, thinking.
"I would have fought for her until the end." Koga finally muttered. Inuyasha shook his head.
"Then I would have had to fight her too then. It was mostly Kagome's choice. Ya expect me to keep her with me against her will?" Inuyasha questioned. Koga didn't know what to say, he just really didn't like the sound of this.
"What are ya doing here anyway?" Inuyasha questioned. Koga glanced at him before scoffing.
"Wow, I can't believe they made you a Commander, you don't even know anything about anything!" Koga spoke with a heated tone. Inuyasha grumbled under his breath.
"You gonna answer me or not?" Inuyasha asked back just as hotly. Koga rolled his eyes before he straightened his posture, trying to look regal or something Inuyasha assumed.
"The council of elders that oversee all of the wolf tribes elected me as their chosen to come here tonight and about time as I am the leader of my own tribe." Koga explained. Inuyasha frowned at him.
"Well then, that explains," He was interrupted though.
"Inuyasha, Inuyasha!" Sango had made her way from across the room quickly. She shocked Koga who stared her down. The wolf demon took in her scent.
"You're pregnant." Was the first thing he said. Sango glared at him.
"Yeah, and you look weird." She stated in retaliation. Koga shook his head before smirking.
"I meant it in the best of ways. You're practically glowing with child, Sango." Koga stated. Sango shook her head in disagreement.
"If you knew how much I've thrown up, you wouldn't be saying that." She quipped. Koga shook his head.
"No, it's amazing!" He exclaimed as he came forward and without asking, he placed a hand on her stomach.
"Is it Inuyasha's?" Koga questioned. Both Sango and Inuyasha flushed at that.
"No, no. There's no way its Inuyasha's!" Sango was quick to let out. Koga nodded with a chuckle.
"Okay, okay, I believe you," Koga stated at her denial.
"It's still amazing, either way," Koga admitted. He had wondered if perhaps Inuyasha and the slayer had gotten together. He still couldn't understand why Inuyasha would ever let Kagome go. Sango was about to say something else, but something caught her eye and she pulled away from Koga who was still feeling up her stomach.
"She's here! Look, Inuyasha, look!" Sango exclaimed as she pointed to the entryway.
"Introducing Alpha Sesshomaru and Alpha Bitch Kagome, keepers and protectors of The West and their pack." The announcement was really only made for the actual lords and their Alpha Bitches, all people below them got no such announcement. Sango was about to run over and perhaps hug Kagome, but then she saw Miroku enter just behind her and she stopped in her tracks and looked the other way.
"Inuyasha, wheres Kikyo?" Sango questioned and Inuyasha glanced at her, taking a small break from staring at Kagome.
"In the room still, she said she was putting together another journal for Kagome," Inuyasha muttered before looking back to Kagome.
'Beautiful, she is so beautiful. That is the kind of person I want to mate.' Inuyasha's Beast chimed in his head as they stared at her. She wore layers of red kimono, the color of a true western miko.
'We cannot have her, not anymore.' Inuyasha admitted to himself.
'They say that if you love something, set it free, if it loves you back, it will return. You know as well as I that Kagome loves us.' His beast replied.
'No, if ya remember everythin' that I do, then you would know that that bridge had long been burned.' Inuyasha answered.
'It is nothing that a bit of courting would not fix.' His beast replied. Inuyasha felt his blood pumping through his veins, he was getting angry.
'We are with Kikyo goddamn-it! Kikyo!' Inuyasha thought back angrily. He was tired of this, Kagome and him had agreed that things were better this way and he was positive it was. He hadn't been angry in a while, except for with his newfound beast's shenanigans. She was probably happier, she had to be if her radiance was anything to take for it. He hoped that her eyes had stayed dry since they had last seen each other.
"Inuyasha!" Kagome exclaimed as she finally found him. Sesshomaru was by her side, he walked with her as she took long strides towards him. When she reached him, rules be damned, she pulled him into a firm hug before pulling away.
"It has been such a long time." She smiled, no, she beamed at him. Inuyasha felt his mouth go dry. His beast was right, she was more beautiful than ever. Her hair had gotten longer, not much, maybe half an inch or so, she wore it down. It was different somehow, stunning really. Her skin almost seemed to be glowing, her eyes held a sort of ascendant look to them.
"Wow, Kagome, you look really good tonight." He couldn't help his words, he was dazzled by what she had become while living in the castle of the Western Lands. He couldn't help it, he was jealous of his brother. She had stayed the same for him, always, and yet, only a month with Sesshomaru and she now looked to be this goddess-like Alpha Bitch who seemed more confident than the Kagome he had ever known.
"Thank you, and you! I heard you're a commander now! I'm so proud of you!" She exclaimed. Inuyasha moved his lips into a slant. He did his best to keep from flushing.
"Keh, I'm only doin' it to help the old man." Inuyasha brushed it aside, but Kagome's brown eyes lit up.
"So you must be close to Hirigana-Sama to call him an old man," Kagome said. Sesshomaru listened to their conversation with little interest and had taken to glancing around, getting a feel for who had already arrived. Inuyasha shrugged to Kagome's statement. Kagome suddenly leaned in and before the hanyou could do anything, Kagome had placed her hands on his face. She turned his head and gazed into his blind
eye.
"Inuyasha... Your eye is... What happened?" She questioned with an upset to her tone. Sesshomaru had seemed to tense up when she grabbed Inuyasha's face, but he too leaned in and gazed at Inuyasha's now blind eye. His animosity disappeared as he realized Kagome was only trying to gain a better view. Inuyasha pulled away and stared downwards.
'Again, Kikyo did this to us, yet Kagome would never do such things.' Inuyasha's Beast was trying to manipulate him. To the beast, Kagome was a good catch. He had no care about being with a demoness, the fact of the matter was, Kagome liked him as a hanyou. She would not ask him to rid his demon self, to rid the beast from his own body. It may belong to his rational side, his more human side, but he too lived here. He too was only half ningen.
'Just shut up! Sesshomaru asked for her hand in mating! We can't have Kagome anymore, even if we wanted to.' Inuyasha thought back.
'Yet someone of his stature can never mate someone like her. Remember all the things we've learned about our parents, the things we already knew? Save Kagome from the heart-ache.' His Beast spoke out yet again.
"Inuyasha?" Kagome questioned when he never answered and seemed to be making weird facial expressions.
"I can't do this right now, I'm sorry Kagome." He looked up as he stared at her for a moment. His eyes turned to Sesshomaru. A frown was firmly placed on his face, his ears were dragged downwards, making him look tired, stressed, and sad.
"I would like to speak with you in private," Inuyasha told him. Sesshomaru hid the shock from his expression. He was good at that after all, but within, he was surprised.
"Why would I talk to you, a lowly half-." He was cut off by Kagome's intense glare. She brought up a finger.
"I'm starting to think you use that term as a form of endearment. He is your brother and if I get any say as your Alpha Bitch, Commander Inuyasha has my complete confidence." Kagome said it all as she stared at him through seething eyeballs, she wore a hostile smile on her face. She blinked as she softened her gaze, unable to stay angry with the demon lord for too long.
"I'm serious, for my sake, can you be civil with him tonight, Sesshomaru-Sama? Even Kikyo-San put aside her differences with me to have one more good night." Kagome said. Sesshomaru gazed at her long and hard. How would that make him look if he were to treat Inuyasha with any dignity? Then again, here he was, with a human as his Alpha Bitch. It already looked bad, nothing could really be any worse than what he'd already made it.
"Very well, only because you do not ask of much and also to honor Hirigana's choice, but I will not go out of my way for him." Sesshomaru gave his word.
Inuyasha found himself shocked. Did that really just happen? Kagome asked him for a favor and Bam! Did he agree just like that?
'What do you think you're doing? Talk to Sesshomaru? About fucking what!?' Inuyasha's Beast's voice rang inside his head.
"I am forever grateful then." Kagome gave a warm smile to the demon lord and although his lips did not upturn in any way, Inuyasha could see a smile in his eyes. The demon lord's eyes lit up at what Kagome had said. Inuyasha felt sickened by it, but he was sure it was more the beast than him. Then again, he didn't really want to see his best friend and his asshole brother so friendly with each other. He knew that since the beginning.
"Well, come then, Commander." Sesshomaru stated as he turned to his left and began to the hall, where there were fewer people crowding around.
Inuyasha flashed a smile at Kagome before he began after his half brother. Although he tried to look happy for Kagome, the truth was, he was terrified at how this would go. He reached where Sesshomaru had stopped, far from prying ears. Once he reached him, the demon lord glared at him.
"Speak or take leave." Sesshomaru had commanded. Inuyasha felt it was strange, usually, he said nothing except an insult and although it wasn't the nicest thing to say... It wasn't something along the lines of "Die" or "You pathetic half-breed."
"I know that we aren't the closest family, keh, we're a pretty horrible family actually." Inuyasha began. Sesshomaru seemed annoyed as the hanyou didn't get to the point.
"Something has happened to me and I don't have anyone really who I think would understand it or help me, except for you," Inuyasha admitted as he scratched the back of his head.
"Your eye?" Sesshomaru questioned, as he had lost an arm. It was nothing alike, although Sesshomaru hated not having an arm, he truly believed losing an eye would be worse. He could not imagine being half-blind, especially with Inuyasha being hanyou. His senses must be crazily cut in half, or so the demon lord perceived.
"No, not that. That sucks, but I don't need help from ya for that." Inuyasha muttered. The hanyou let out a sigh and he covered his ears for a second with his eyes closed. He brought his hands down to his sides as he fidgeted, yet he tried to compose himself.
"You had to have gone through this Sesshomaru... This voice in my head is killin' me! I feel like I'm goin' insane!" Inuyasha said as he looked his older brother in the eye. The whites of his eyes were going pink, he was losing control. Sesshomaru eyed him up and down, finding the Tesseiga latched at his hip.
"A voice?" Sesshomaru pondered as he didn't understand for the life of him what Inuyasha meant. Only for a moment, that is.
'His beast is surfacing, his inuyokai blood is strong.' Sesshomaru's Beast had taken the time to make Sesshomaru aware.
'He has never been taught and inuyokai beasts are different from a turtle's. You remember how bad it was for us at first, we should help him.' Sesshomaru's Beast spoke inwardly to him. Sesshomaru frowned at this, not a large frown, just a slight downturn of the lips.
'He is too lowly for someone of This Sesshomaru's stature to help.' Sesshomaru responded inwardly.
'We wish to court Kagome, this, I am positive, would make her happy with us.' The demon lord's Beast replied haughtily. The beast went on.
'Stop being an idiot. This is the easiest piece of courtship ever, we will have to do more, but doing this will make her think higher of us and since the half-breed is our younger brother, people will not see it as something we have done to please Kagome.' His beast explained. Sesshomaru gave thought to it for a moment or two.
'You really think this would help us win her over more?' Sesshomaru questioned.
'Just do it or don't and see how upset she gets when HE tells her we wouldn't help him with this very personal, inuyokai problem.' Sesshomaru's beast taunted. Sesshomaru held back a sigh before he finally spoke to the hanyou.
"Your soul is splitting into two. It's going against all of your cares? All that you hold your honor to?" Sesshomaru questioned. That's how things went for him at first. Inuyasha looked at him, shame in his eyes as he nodded.
"First off, Inuyasha, do not be ashamed of this happening. Not many half—." Sesshomaru stopped himself per Kagome's request.
"Not many hanyou are gifted with this wonderful demon ability. Your beast is half of you, you must work together or you will eventually become a lesser yokai." Sesshomaru explained. He didn't do a very good job of it though, because it shook Inuyasha to his core.
"Wait! You're tellin' me, that if I can't get this thing to agree with me, I'm gonna become a lesser yokai?" Inuyasha questioned with fear and resentment in his voice. Sesshomaru glared at his ignorance. Rather, it was Sesshomaru who was ignorant of Inuyasha's mixed knowledge of his heritage.
"Yes, but there must be something that your beast wants, perhaps to kill someone certain, a choice of mate, anything. Ask it." Sesshomaru told him. It was never this easy for him, but who knows, if he fixed this now, he'd never have to hear of it again. That's what he was hoping for. Inuyasha frowned.
"Yeah, ya see Sesshomaru, what my beast wants, I won't give it to him," Inuyasha explained. Sesshomaru stood there, annoyance just reaching his face, but barely.
"What does it want that you won't give?" Sesshomaru asked.
"Well, first off, it wants me to leave Kikyo," Inuyasha stated.
"Is there another thing it wants too? Tell me." Sesshomaru ordered. He suspected there was more to it since the hanyou started out with 'first off.' He wanted no time wasted. Inuyasha shook his head.
"I can't tell ya." He answered.
'Kagome, his beast wants to reclaim Kagome.' Sesshomaru's Beast guessed. Sesshomaru felt that animosity from before beginning to return.
'Remember, Sesshomaru, how I was when I first came, we were not yet anything together. We seethed at each other, I doubt Inuyasha's rational mind really wants that at all. He gave her to us, his beast is just being unruly.' Sesshomaru's Beast added. It wasn't really Inuyasha's fault, whatever his beast demanded.
"I understand now." Sesshomaru stated aloud. Inuyasha's ears flattened against his head as he waited for his brother to attack him.
"You may have to agree to leave the dead one." Sesshomaru finally said. Inuyasha was about to widen his eyes, but instead, his eyes bled red and he snapped forward, like some sort of animal, and stared into Sesshomaru's eyes with curiosity. Sesshomaru stared at him, seeing just how beast-like Inuyasha could be. The hanyou tried to be threatening by standing tall and hunching forward with baring teeth, but it really wasn't all that intimidating to the demon lord.
"You are his beast, I presume." Sesshomaru stated. He knew it was, the teal pupils and jagged stripes were a dead giveaway to the change of character.
"The dead one, the dead one..." Inuyasha muttered the last under his breath before he broke out into a chuckle that came deep from within his throat. Sesshomaru waited for the beast to say anything of intelligence.
"The Oracle spoke of the dead one. She said the dead one would do her best to destroy the pattern of holes in the eyes in the basket and that she would steal Capricorn, the Oracle said something about the dead one being lost in the ocean and something about two sisters." The beast stated. Sesshomaru narrowed his eyes. Inuyasha's beast was ecstatic, it had never yet put two and two together, but really, he now believed that Kikyo had to be the dead one.
"Oracle?" Sesshomaru questioned. Reika had said something about an Oracle. The monk and her had shared a dream of such.
"Yes, yes, a Miko who is said to be an Oracle is here. She has a private room in the medical wing." Inuyasha's beast explained.
"Now..." Sesshomaru repeated as he thought of what was being said. His eyes began to harden, although his own beast did not make it's way to the surface at all. Rather, he did not like where this was going. He used Moko-Moko to grab Inuyasha's form, the length of fluff coiled tightly around the hanyou's body. It held his arms and hands to his sides and his legs and ankles together, subduing him completely. Sesshomaru had Moko-Moko hold Inuyasha up, dangling him up in the air as the hanyou struggled fruitlessly.
"Do you wish to mate Kagome?" Sesshomaru questioned. The beast of Inuyasha glared at him.
"You can never really have her, never really mate her!" It spat. Sesshomaru slammed him against the floor, hard, even hurting Moko-Moko in the process, but it would be worth it. Sesshomaru held him back up and held up his only hand. Poison began to ooze out of his fingertips.
"Do you really think you can take her from me?" Sesshomaru questioned. The Beast of Inuyasha glared daggers at the demon lord.
"I will tell you this only once! If you dare even try to exude flattery upon her, I will take your heart and melt it with my poison. Do not test me, half-breed." Sesshomaru stated. The beast watched the poison from Sesshomaru's fingertips drip to the floor, melting the fine wood.
"She was mine first!" The beast exclaimed.
"Oh, but now I am sure, you're the one who burned her. You called her a whore! I blamed Inuyasha, but it is really your perverse nature. Isn't it?" Sesshomaru snarled. The rabid Inuyasha seemed to make himself smaller.
"Have I struck a nerve yet?" Sesshomaru questioned as he cast an amused glance at the thing. Inuyasha's beast glared at him through shameful, red and teal eyes.
"You probably hurt her worse already." The red-eyed Inuyasha spat. Sesshomaru held back a chuckle.
"If anyone hurts anyone, she hurts me when I go against her wishes," Sesshomaru admitted. He would prove that this little Miko was strong. He pulled down his kimono, only a little to show his armless shoulder. He let the horrible blue bruise be shown to the hanyou.
"You think you could fare better with her now-trained abilities?" Sesshomaru questioned.
"She would just sit me ya dumb-ass!" Inuyasha's Beast growled. Sesshomaru found himself glaring at the beads of subjugation.
"You saw how she looks, I provide for her only the best. The best clothes, the best food, the best tutors, the best housing, could you provide her all of that?" Sesshomaru questioned. The beast scoffed.
"I am a commander now, the south even has onsens, unlike the west." The beast cheekily replied. Sesshomaru let himself think, he knew there must be something he could flaunt to the hanyou to make him back down.
"Yet, she is now Alpha Bitch of the west. Would you take her away from such a position? She is now your higher. You bow to her. You wish for her to step down and be below you?" Sesshomaru stated. Inuyasha frowned.
"I'm a prince." The beast snapped.
"I am a lord. You wish to challenge me for my place?" Sesshomaru questioned hotly. Inuyasha glared at Sesshomaru.
"I respect Kagome over all else, I will ask her where she stands, would you respect her decision on that? She has wanted me for so long, yet I did not exist to show this dumb-ass the way! I have only thus been born to see all my cares stripped away from me by the whims of a human." The beast was angry at his rational side. His rational side fucked everything up for him. His plans. His dreams. Sesshomaru frowned openly. He did respect Kagome, but this was Inuyasha. She loved Inuyasha for so long. What if she did leave him? Then again, he wanted her to also be happy. If she wanted to be with the hanyou...
"I do not like the path you have chosen to take for this, but I will respect Kagome's wishes," Sesshomaru admitted as he put the hanyou down and unwound him from Moko-Moko.
"However, if you hurt her... I will kill you, half-breed." Sesshomaru added. He said nothing more, he walked past the hanyou that stared him down with red eyes. He wanted to hear no more, Inuyasha would approach his Kagome and offer her all the things that he couldn't. His duty and his virtue stood in his way. The people he ruled would take such offense at her becoming his mate, Inuyasha was right, beast or not. Sesshomaru could never mate her, he could never really have her. It wasn't fair to Kagome.
He wandered back into the great hall where people were laughing and dancing. He knew she would leave him. Why wouldn't she? She had been enamored by the hanyou for so long and now Inuyasha was on the same page as she had once been.
She was nothing if not forgiving. He knew she would forgive him and give him another chance. He strode through the great hall with his head held high. He wanted to hang it lowly, facing downwards, but to do so would be unbecoming of him. Instead, he searched her out so that he could lay his eyes on her once more. She was his right now. He wanted to see his Kagome before she was no more his own.
He saw her standing there, a smile wide on her face. She was talking with a wolf demon. She laughed and shook her head, causing her hair to swish around with the movement. She moved her hands around as she spoke.
She was so beautiful. Her kimono was perfectly wrapped around her body and she had done some strange makeup. Her eyes were lined with black, creating a cat eye look. Shimmery sparkles decorated her eyelids and instead of traditional red, her lips were painted in some sort of nude color that made them look natural, yet perfect.
He closed his eyes slowly and burned her image into the back of his mind. He would always remember her. How she looked, how she smelled, the way she sounded when she laughed. He would remember it forever and lock it away so he could remember to never fall for someone so easily ever again. Rather, he would never fall for anyone at all. The worst part of it all was that it seemed so hopeless because his beast agreed with him. It agreed that she would leave him for the half breed. Again, why would she not?
He watched the red-eyed hanyou enter the giant room, it seemed he had calmed enough for his jagged stripes to become only tanned cheek again, but his eyes were still that of his demon blood. Sesshomaru watched as Inuyasha sauntered towards his Kagome. He couldn't watch and so he turned around and went back out into the hall. He started towards a certain place, a garden that held monuments of some of the gods. His father had always told him of the place and although he never thought he would seek it out, he felt like if his father were to be here in spirit in any way, shape, or form, it would be there.
It didn't take him long to reach the moonlit gardens. Enchantments kept the snow off the ground, so the gardens were in perfect condition even at this time of year. He chose a wooden bench that was placed by a tall sakura tree that was not in bloom. It wasn't the time of the year for that. He sat down.
"We were never really all that close. Mother always took better care of me than you." He spoke out loud. His eyes faced the ground, beautiful pink and yellow flowers painted the ground with their floral charm.
"But I can't help but wonder..." He trailed off as he pictured Kagome's face in his mind, her beautiful, perfect face.
"Did you feel this way for her? Like you'd die for her? Like you'd give her anything if only to make her smile?" He questioned aloud, referring to his father's lover, Izayoi.
"I know I wasn't the best son and you weren't the best father, but..." Sesshomaru heaved a sigh. Usually, he didn't allow himself the pleasure, but no one was around right now.
"They all hated her, but you still loved her. You fought for her love until the end and you left my mother for her. I think maybe... If I had someone else, I'd have left them for Kagome. Yet, your other son wants to take her away from me. That incessant fool will take her and I know she will choose him. Why wouldn't she? You've ruined everything for me by bringing him into this world." Sesshomaru looked upwards to the heavens, glaring at nothing, though he would glare at his father if he could. He looked back down, collecting his thoughts.
"Yet, I have to let her choose. She is her own person, she has said as well. I don't know if its the right thing to do, but I just want her to find happiness." He went on.
"I just wish it was I that made her happy." He placed his elbow on his knee and slouched forward to prop his chin against his hand. Although most would not be able to tell, he was clearly stressed out. For the first time in his life, he was going to lose the thing that had become of most importance to him. He was going to lose the only woman he had ever desperately fell in love with. Everything he had worked so hard for this past while would be thrown away and for what? What was the point to all of this?
His insides hurt. His stomach churned with grievance and he felt as though there was a gaping hole through his chest. Although nothing had stabbed him, there may as well be a dagger stuck in his gut, being twisted and twisted until he could no longer breathe. Why would he want to breathe without her anyway? Again, what was the point to this? What was the point to anything?
H&DR
"Kagome." Inuyasha had found her talking to Koga, much to his dismay, but he interrupted them. The two turned towards him.
"Inuyasha your eyes are red," Koga stated bluntly and the hanyou rolled his eye.
"I need to speak with you now, Kagome," Inuyasha said. Kagome stared at him for a moment, a bit confused.
"Alright, I guess." She said and before she could speak again and also ask about hs red eyes, Inuyasha looped her arm with his and started off. She tried to look back to Koga, but he pulled her along so fast that there was time for nothing. He was going somewhere specific, to the place that his mother and father had introduced themselves to each other at. It didn't take long to get there, he took her outside the sliding wooden door to the wrought-iron gate and he pulled it open.
"Oh, this place is beautiful," Kagome exclaimed as she stepped forward. Patches of flowers were everywhere. Sakura trees were well placed throughout, although they were long dead.
"How isn't it snowy in here?" Kagome questioned. Inuyasha chuckled.
"Hirigana-Sama built this place for his mate, he knows old magic, it's enchanted," Inuyasha stated as he grabbed her hand and pulled her forward.
"This is where my parents met." He explained as they walked forward a few steps. Kagome turned to smile at him.
"It must have been romantic for them," Kagome said as she wondered what their meetup had been like.
"Yes, and I always wanted to take the woman that I love here," Inuyasha said as he smiled warmly at Kagome. Kagome herself held a soft expression.
"Have you brought her here yet?" She thought that he was referring to Kikyo.
"I've brought her here just now, in this very moment." He stated as he stared at her. A frown formed on Kagome's face as she stared back at him. In her stomach, she felt dread pooling. She wished she could just be one of these shriveled up sakura trees, surely, Inuyasha wouldn't want her if she was a tree.
"Are you saying?" She began, hoping that he was not saying what she believed he was saying. He nodded.
"I love you Kagome, I want us to be together. Sesshomaru can never mate you, but I can. Let me be the one to mate you, Kagome." Inuyasha offered himself up to her on a silver platter. Her eyes found the ground. How could he do this? This should have been a crime. It was surely an act of cruelty.
"There was a time when I really wanted to hear that from you." She would be honest, brutally honest.
Inuyasha stood there nervously, waiting for her to go on. He didn't know where she was going with this, but he was almost positive she would say yes. How couldn't she? After all of this time apart, he was sure that she'd want him now more than ever.
"But when we broke things off... I meant it." Kagome said.
"I'm more in love with Sesshomaru than ever, Inuyasha. He cares about me, he's doing his best to make things work between us. Even if things aren't how I'd like, I want to be with him." She added. A scowl began to form on Inuyasha's face.
"Distance makes the heart grow fonder!" Inuyasha shouted in an attempt to change her mnd.
"And so does a healthy relationship! He has never done anything to hurt me Inuyasha. I'm sorry but we're over!" Kagome let out. Inuyasha's ears flattened. He backed away slowly, a look of deep hurt in his strange red eyes. Once he got past the gate, he turned around and ran back inside from the gardens. Kagome frowned as she felt guilty. Yet, she couldn't throw away everything she had with Sesshomaru just to make Inuyasha happy. What about her happiness? Didn't that matter?
More than likely, if she did, he'd just leave her for Kikyo again. Sesshomaru never once pretended she was someone else and that was more than she could say for Inuyasha. She let herself walk down the pathway a little before she found a wooden bench and she promptly sat on it. Even though the gardens were beautiful, she felt it was ruined by what had just happened. She was so deep in thought, she had barely noticed that someone had sat down next to her until she felt a shadow loom over her. She turned her head quickly and jumped in surprise to see a tall figure had sat down by her.
"Sesshomaru-Sama, when did you get here?" She questioned. He was staring at her, looking almost confused.
"I've been here the whole time," Sesshomaru admitted and she felt her face flush as she looked downwards. She grabbed a strand of her hair and played with the split ends, probably making them worse. It had been a while since her last haircut, even if it looked amazing tonight.
"I'm sorry." She admitted. He shook his head, his hair becoming a little mussed in the process.
"For what?" He questioned, he was staring at her seriously. To her, it felt like an intense gaze. She stared into his golden eyes and she wondered if it was because he was mad at her.
"For what Inuyasha said, I wouldn't have come out here if I had known," Kagome stated. Sesshomaru held his mouth in a thin-pressed line as he looked to be stuck in his own head for a moment.
"You rejected him." He finally said. Kagome nodded as she searched his eyes.
"Well, I mean, there's definitely something going on between us," Kagome said. Sesshomaru nodded slightly as he took away one of her hands from playing with her hair. He brought her palm to his chest, over his heart and closed his eyes.
"I had been sure you would go back to him. I always thought you would choose him over me if given the chance." Sesshomaru admitted his thoughts that had plagued him. He was opening up to her on a whole new level. He felt like he should. He wanted her completely and even if before all of this, he thought that having a mate would be annoying, having to answer to someone... This was nothing like that. She was a strange creature, one of beauty, wrath, charisma, wisdom, she was a motherly figure and at the same time a holy virgin. Kagome pulled her hand away and glared at him.
"So you don't have any faith in me?" She questioned. Sesshomaru averted his gaze.
"You and I both know how long you spent pining for him." Sesshomaru stated. He felt her hand come to his face, not in a slap, but a soft touch. She gripped his chin and pulled his face towards her so she could once more see into his golden hued eyes. She stared into them sternly.
"You've taught me so much and you've opened up to me so much... You anger me quite a bit, but it's been a long time since I've been sad. It's been a really long time since I've felt heartbroken. Even when I do feel it with you, its usually because I'm not seeing the whole picture." She told him. Her gaze was killing him, it sucked him in and made him listen to her wholly.
"You're trying to accommodate yourself to me, trying to change certain things about yourself, things that you probably believed for hundreds of years and I'm trying too," Kagome added.
"You're the one I want." Kagome went on, trying to find the right words. Sesshomaru stared at her as the words soaked in. She let his chin go and her hand drifted down to her lap.
"All this time I've been scared to say this, but... After all of this, I know its true because I know I'll be loyal to you. I've now killed for you. For me to do those things for you..." She blushed heavily as her voice trailed off. However, Sesshomaru interrupted her before she could continue.
"I want tonight to be a date." He stated, it had been on his mind and he hadn't really meant to say it. She always made him nervous, made him soft, she was his weakness. Yet, her pacifying him was no dislike of his. He had found the person he wanted to share eternity with.
Kagome stared at him before smiling. She nodded her agreement.
"Then a date it shall be." Her face was priceless. The happiness there, it warmed the ice lord's heart.
"I did not mean to interrupt..." He trailed off. Much like she had throughout her entire little speech. She nodded before she blushed again and looked away.
"Miko-Sama." Sesshomaru said as he tried to move back into her view.
"Tell me what you were going to say." He added and he could see her face heat up further. He brought his hand up to place it on her cheek. She blushed more, as impossible as that was.
"Do you love me Miko-Sama?" He questioned teasingly. Kagome brought her face away from his hand and playfully glared at the silver-haired demon. She pointed a finger at him.
"Hey! Don't ruin this!" She let out only to find herself become wide-eyed. There, on his face, was a smile. It was widely set and it made her blink with shock before she too smiled widely.
"Do you think we're alone?" Kagome asked seriously, her eyes were big and Sesshomaru sent his aura out at her question. When he cast it out and found only her and himself empty-handed, he nodded.
"Yes, I do think we are." He stated. She looked downwards as she seemed to be contemplating something.
"Usually... In all the movies, when people admit these kinds of things... One of them kisses the other." She remarked quietly, nervously. Sesshomaru recalled that just such a thing occurred in the film she had taken him to see. A few moments of silence went by.
"Kiss me then, Miko-Sama." Sesshomaru stated and she brought her eyes up to look at him as she chewed on her lip.
"I..." She blushed heavily again. They had kissed before, he had even touched her in ways that no one else had. Yet, she was so terrified right now because if she admitted her love for him, then she'd be giving him full power over her. He could demolish her.
"I do love you." She finally found her voice and found it rather calm, even if it wasn't really how she was feeling. She was in no way calm, but she had managed to steady her voice enough to sound it.
"And I love you Kagome." Sesshomaru answered her almost immediately. It almost startled her, how quick he was to say it, but she felt her insides melt at that. He had gone through all of this trouble for her. He cared about her. Her, a human girl, a Miko, but still a human. She had always doubted that he would love her, but he'd said it to her more than once now. She leaned in slowly, staring into his eyes as she did so. His eyes pierced hers deeply, she could see his caring, his love... His lust. He leaned downwards, awaiting her at not such a height so that she could reach him.
She closed her eyes once she was a breath's width away from him and then her lips pressed against his. He loved the forbiddon feel of her lips against his own. He brought an arm around her back and pulled her in closer. When she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and pressed her chest against his own, he could feel her desire. She kissed him over and over again, greedily. He kissed her back, as many times as she wanted, he was overjoyed that she had told him with her own mouth that she loved him, for he had loved her for a while. It broke his heart, not having it reciprocated, but now he knew for a fact that she did. She was always honest with herself and with him. He could smell that much.
She pulled back slightly to press her forehead against his. She gazed into his honey gold eyes and felt so happy in the moment.
"You know what I've realized though, Sesshomaru-Sama?" Kagome said as she drew back even further.
"Hn?" He questioned her with his usual noise.
"I think... I think that I'm happy that Inuyasha broke my heart." She admitted. Sesshomaru stared at her long and hard, trying to understand what she was saying. Her brown eyes looked so sincere with what she had just said. Yet, he didn't understand what on earth she was trying to say.
"Why?" He asked her, wanting to know how her mind worked. How she came up with that. She gave a small smile.
"I would never appreciate 'this'."
She pointed back and forth to him and her, referring to their relationship.
"Like I do now if I hadn't of felt such low times. The bad times make the good ones better because you can compare them and know when you're truly happy." She explained. Sesshomaru's hard glance softened with her words.
"Now we have kissed." He stated. She nodded sheepishly.
"I want to lick you though too." Every time he said anything about licking, it made her feel so embarrassed. She knew now that it was a normal, inuyokai thing, but to her, a human, it was kind of taboo and would remain that way. He brought his face to the crook of her neck and inhaled deeply. He let himself become intoxicated by her scent before he let his tongue slip past his lips and he carved a trail to her ear from her neck. Her body shivered as he did so and he smiled against her skin. He continued dragging his tongue against her skin, making his way back to her collarbone when she spoke.
"Sesshomaru, did you know that we shared blood?" She questioned. He pulled back a bit at that, to stare at her.
"Shared blood?" He questioned.
"Our first encounter, when your beast took over, he begged me to share blood with him.
We drank each other's blood at the same time, kind of like something I imagine vampires would do." Kagome admitted, nodding her head as she said so. Sesshomaru shook his head. He'd never heard of blood sharing in such a way except when mating someone, but then you had to infuse your yokai with the bite, a very potent amount.
"I was wondering..." Kagome blushed as she averted her eyes.
"If we would ever do that again?" Kagome questioned. Sesshomaru gazed at her in wonder. Perfection, his beast and him had agreed once before and they agreed again. She was perfect, for him anyways.
"We shall do whatever this Kagome wants." He told her and she flushed again at that.
"Our rooms are right next to each other tonight... Maybe... Somehow, we could see each other?" She questioned him. He nodded eagerly. He would spend every second that he could with her.
"We could share blood now." He cooed, excited at her words. However, she shook her head.
"We need to be secretive Sessho-Chan, if we share blood now and make a mess, people will be suspicious." She explained, but he was staring at her in shock which threw her off. She went over what she said in her head before her eyes widened. She shook her head and bowed it a few times in apology.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to call you by such. I mean, I think it in my head sometimes, but I probably shouldn't say it." She was babbling on and on, but she was silenced when his lips pressed against hers once more, stunning her. The demon lord pulled back with a look of adoration in his eyes.
"I adore the pet name, Kag-Ai." He responded and her face blew up before she gained her composure again and smiled.
"Do you really love me, Sessho-Chan?" She questioned. His eyes narrowed as he leaned in so close that his lips were almost touching hers.
"Very much so." He admitted.
H&DR
The Western Castle was quiet. Unnaturally quiet. That much Chizuro had decided. She stood in a hallway, no one was there although it was usually crowded. She turned her face to eye the opposite corridor. She bit her lower lip as she thought.
'They have still not proven Kagome to be the pathetic human she is. How long will we let that ningen bitch stand in our way?' Naru whispered into her ear. Chizuro frowned at that.
She couldn't really say what it was about Sesshomaru that she liked. He was the Lord of the West and he was of the strongest of the inuyokai bloodline. If she could manage to mate with him, her children would be superb. Not only that, but she would be the Alpha Bitch of the West and she would have so much power at that.
She shook her head. It would be a damn near impossible feat with how Sesshomaru had already rejected her.
'We are the prettiest inuyokai to exist, so why else do you think that he has denied us?' Naru questioned. Chizuro frowned. She knew why... That human girl. He liked a pathetic human girl. It was insane. How could their lord choose a human over a beauty such as herself?
"You." A rough, baritone voice sounded from around the corner. Chizuro turned her head to catch a glimpse of a monkey demon with reddish fur. She knew who he was, he was the leader of the council and a large opinion in the quorum. Chizuro turned towards him and nodded her head in acknowledgment.
"Kata-San." She stated in greeting. The monkey demon eyed her for a moment before he took a few steps forward.
"I've been looking for you." He told her. She gazed at him with narrowed eyes. She was curious as to what he wanted.
"It has proven difficult as I do not even know your name." He added. She smirked as she shook her head.
"I am called Chizuro." She explained. Kata stared at her as a smile formed on his face.
"Well, I have a position that has opened up and I could think of no one better. You seemed very upset at the relationship you say our Lord has with that ningen." He began his offer. Chizuro perked up, listening intently.
"I am forming a tribunal to investigate, I want to start before our Lord is back. We can get to people before he does." Kata explained. Chizuro nodded her head, taking in all that he was saying.
"I have chosen you to lead it." He said. Chizuro shook her head with widened eyes.
"I thought that all the members of the tribunal were chosen at random?" She questioned. Such things were common knowledge.
"Well, sometimes you can set things up to be the way that you want them to be," Kata said, he cast his eyes downward. If she didn't know any better, she'd say he looked shady. Chizuro stared at him for a moment more.
"I would love to do anything to help."
H&DR
Sango was laying on her bedroll. Her hand drifted over her baby bump.
"He's here... I can't believe he's here." She said softly. She blinked her eyes shut and held her breathe for a moment.
"You knew he would be," Kikyo stated from where she sat. She was on the floor bent over a leather-bound journal. Her hand was busy writing down information.
"I couldn't face him... It really terrified me. Seeing him. What if he hates me now?" She asked. Kikyo gazed upwards at her with her lips pressed together.
"Why would he hate you Sango? You need to talk to him." She said. Sango shook her head.
"No, I... I can't face him." The slayer admitted.
"You will never—." Kikyo began, but they were interrupted by a tapping at the door. Both Kikyo and Sango turned their eyes to the door. Before they said anything, it slid open. There stood Inuyasha, his head hung low with his bangs in front of his eyes. His mouth held the biggest frown the two had ever seen. Behind him stood Miroku. Sango felt like she would be sick. There was no escaping this now.
"Kikyo, we need to talk," Inuyasha stated in a low voice. Kikyo gazed up at him before she placed her calligraphy brush down gently and she began to stand.
"What's wrong?" She began to ask.
"We'll talk out here," Inuyasha replied instantly. Kikyo frowned. Inuyasha seemed upset, that much she could tell.
"And Miroku wanted to see you Sango." He muttered as he moved to the side so that he was out of Miroku's way. Sango was quick to sit up and wrap her arms around her stomach. She didn't want Miroku knowing, not yet anyway. She prayed to the gods that Inuyasha didn't tell him already. As Kikyo left with Inuyasha, Miroku entered, sliding the door shut behind him.
"Sango... I..." He didn't know where to start as he stood just past the door. He took a deep breath as he thought of what he should say. Sango looked as nervous as him. He frowned as he took the few steps to reach her and he lowered himself to sit next to her on her bedroll.
"When did we become this?" He questioned. She stared at him through wide eyes. Her lips parted, but no words came out.
"I've tried to tell myself that this is better. That all this heartache... Its all for you. To keep you happy, but is it?" He frowned as his eyes found the floor.
"I don't think I can do that anymore though. I don't want to waste another second away from you, especially when I don't think I have very much more time." He blurted it all out. His breathing was shallow, sweat began to ooze from his brow. He was so scared of being rejected. All he wanted was to spend the last of his time with her, yet... What if she really hated him now? She said nothing, simply stared at him with wide eyes. He shook his head and clenched his fists.
"Please Sango! Say anything! Tell me you hate me or love me or that want me dead! Anything, but please... Talk to me." He uttered in desperation. Sango's eyes brimmed with with unshed tears.
"I missed you so much." Her voice came out quiet. He stared at her for a second, but it didn't last long because she threw herself into his arms. Her hands clenched the back of his kimono. He looked nice, she decided, in the white and red kimono he donned. He had been in shock for a moment, sitting there, not moving.
However, it was soon enough that he wrapped his arms around her as well. He tightened his hold on her, making to never let go. This was the best thing that could ever happen to him. She wanted him. She wanted him to hold her. Maybe, just maybe... She wanted him just as much as he wanted her. He pulled back slightly to stare into her hazelnut-colored eyes.
"I know that I haven't seen you in a long while Sango... But I love you. I know that now, I love you so much." He admitted. Tears dripped down her cheeks, but a smile was firmly on her face.
"I love you too." She stated. She grabbed his uncorded hand and stared at it as she traced her fingers against his hand. Her heart was pounding, she looked anxious. Her breathing had picked up, but she tried to calm herself. She led his hand to her stomach as she stared deeply into his eyes.
Miroku noticed instantly that her belly was much bigger than before. He didn't understand for a moment until his eyes widened.
"Sango..." He began to say as his voice became more sensitive.
"It's ours... Miroku, we're going to be parents." Her voice was choked up as she said it, she sniffled a few times. She didn't know why she was crying. She had been so scared and although she felt relieved, that didn't stop her tears.
"Parents... We're going to be parents!? I'm going to be a father?" He questioned. Sango nodded a few times. She watched as his face lit up, he smiled so brightly. His eyes drifted to her stomach.
"And you'll be such a good mother. I know you will be." He stated.
"And you'll be a good father," Sango said. His smile dropped. He shook his head as his eyes narrowed. He looked to be in the heat of some inner turmoil.
"I don't have much time left, but I'll give whatever I have left to you and to our child." His eyes were sad and what he said crippled her heart. She pulled his hand away from her stomach and clenched it with both of her hands.
"No. We will find Naraku and kill him! I won't let your curse consume you... I won't!" She exclaimed. Miroku looked downwards.
"Sango... We should spend what time we have left. We have no leads whatsoever. I don't want to waste any more precious time. I don't have much, so, please... Let us try to live the life we wanted at least for a little bit. I know its selfish, but this is all I want. I want a peek at what I have wanted since I met you, please, Sango." He pleaded with her. Sango shook her head and choked on her voice. She couldn't take him saying all of these things. She didn't want to lose him again, but she knew he was right. They shouldn't waste any more time. How much longer until they couldn't be together at all anymore?
"Miroku, let's do this then, let's be together while we can." She said.
"Sango." Miroku stared at her. She gazed up into his violet eyes.
"Yes?" She asked. He took one of her hands that clenched his uncorded hand. He held both of her hands in his own.
"I know that this is all cursed, it has been from the beginning... And I know I'm being completely selfish, but I want to be with you all the way." He stated.
"I want to give myself to you, all the way. I want to commit myself to you with the gods as my witness. I want your hand." He admitted. He was nervous, almost shaking. He breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth and this breathing exercise was the only thing keeping him from losing his cool. He was trying so hard to ask her, but he was afraid. After everything, he was terrified. He knew it was wrong to ask her, but he had to. He couldn't die without ever knowing if she would be his.
"Miroku, shut up." She stated. He pressed his lips together and his forehead creased.
"I don't know if this is what you're asking me, but I'm going to ask you." She said. She held his hands tightly now and gazed seriously into his eyes.
"Miroku, a monk of the people, champion of my heart, will you commit to me as I will commit to you? Will you comfort me as long as you can and in turn, I'll comfort you?" Her eyes softened and a small smile found her lips.
"Will you marry me?" She asked. Miroku stared at her for a moment before a large smile broke out on his face.
"There is nothing in this world that I want more." He said. The look on Sango's face was worth a king's ransom. She looked so joyous. A smile stretched across her face and reached her eyes. She looked so beautiful with her hair pulled up into coils by multiple hair ornaments and her kimono easily concealed her belly, although he would rather see it.
"Can I kiss you?" He questioned. He didn't want to move too quickly.
"I don't know, can you?" She asked him jokingly. He stared at her. He didn't know what to say. He opened his mouth, probably to say something stupid.
"Don't talk." She held her fingertips to his lips. She traced his lips with her forefinger before she brought her palm further onto his face, to hold his cheek. Her eyes were misty and his heart pounded so hard, he was scared it would burst out of his chest. She inched closer and closer to him until their lips finally met. She pressed her own mouth against his something fierce and his hands went around her body and clenched at her kimono. Her own hand drifted from his cheek, past his hair, so that she could grab a fistful of hair. She used it as leverage to pull him closer and to keep him close. After they had their fill, they pulled away and their eyes met.
"I love you Sango, you've made me the happiest man." He said. She smiled brightly.
"And I'm the happiest woman." She replied. A sudden frown made its way to Miroku's face.
"Wait, Sango... Certain things have happened before you decide all of these things. We need to talk about everything that's happened." He explained. She stared at him for a moment. She felt worry flow through her body. What could have happened that would make him look at her like that? She knew something serious must have happened, but she decided to stay open minded. She wasn't the same girl that lost him. She was a woman now, she was different. Yet, she knew he was too.
H&DR
Inuyasha was pacing back and forth and Kikyo was staring at him uneasily.
"Just tell me Inuyasha." She stated. He finally stopped and looked at her. A frown was on his face and his eyes beheld shame.
"You know how I keep losing control?" He finally asked. Her eyes narrowed with confusion as she nodded.
"Its getting worse, way worse... I know why now too." He said. She waited for him to go on.
"My soul is splitting in half. Its called a beast or something like that... And it hates everything I want." He said. She frowned at that.
"It does things that I would never do." He added.
"Inuyasha?" Her voice faltered.
"It hates you Kikyo." He said. Her heart broke in two at his words.
"It wanted Kagome." He went on. Kikyo said nothing, which only worried Inuyasha more.
"It took over tonight, earlier. It tried to get her to be with him." Inuyasha explained. Kikyo's lips quivered.
"She rejected him, but I'm scared of what it'll do next... It goes against everything I want." He admitted. Kikyo shook her head a few times as she kept her mouth shut.
"Kikyo, please," he stepped towards her and took her hands in his own.
"Say something." He said. She pulled her hands away quickly, angrilly.
"What do you expect me to say? That it's okay? Because it's not!" Her voice became volatile.
"It wasn't me Kikyo, that did it, please!" He begged. She turned her eyes away.
"She is always in the way of US!" Kikyo finally said with a cold voice. She felt so upset. Always, Kagome stole his heart from her.
"Kikyo, I love you, but until I figure this out, it's not safe for you." He finally admitted. He was not only scared of his beast, but he was also scared of her reaction.
"So you're leaving me now too? For her?" Kikyo bit out, her voice quickly becoming bitter.
"No, Kikyo, it is not like that." Inuyasha began.
"Then what is it like Inuyasha!?" Her voice raised in tone.
"I don't want to hurt you! I have to learn to control it." He said.
"Then let's do that together," Kikyo muttered. Inuyasha held his head.
"I can't Kikyo, I... I love you so much and I know I messed up with everything, but it will only be for a little while. Just until I can control it." Inuyasha explained.
"If you really loved me, you'd fight harder!" Kikyo bit out. Inuyasha shook his head, frustration deeply imbued his eyes.
"Kikyo..." He tried to grasp her hands again, but she backed up, out of his reach.
"This was a mistake." She said. Inuyasha felt hollow at her words. He felt like he was dying from the inside.
"This was all a big mistake." She muttered as she turned swiftly and began to walk away at a fast pace. Inuyasha was about to follow.
"Kikyo, wait!" He called out.
'Leave her. It's better this way.' The monster inside Inuyasha's mind stated. Inuyasha felt immeasurable pain grip him. He crouched down and brought his knees to his chest. Normally the hanyou was strong. Normally he was tough and hard, even resilient. Not now though. Rogue tears slipped past his eyes. Even though he felt weak for crying, he couldn't help it. The woman he loved was slipping away and there was nothing he could do about it. He knew if she stayed, he would end up hurting her, no, not him. His beast would harm her, he had already threatened to do so many times.
When the beast had stolen his body out from under him, he knew she wasn't safe. He knew that it was futile to fight because he couldn't fight it. The beast could reign control whenever he wanted. Thats what terrified Inuyasha much more than Kikyo leaving. If she was gone, he couldn't harm her. He couldn't hurt or kill her without even being conscious.
Forever Changing
A/N: And a pretty long chapter this time. I'm actually deeply excited! Extremely excited! I am finally getting to parts I have long imagined in my head. The next chapter is 'the lemon' on Ao3 and I will be trying to get this story up on Dokuga soon. The non-lemon version will be posted here. On Ao3, my account name is lcoruscate123, I should probably try and change it to Tsuveras sometime soon so that it will hopefully be less confusing. Anyways, that won't be until next time, but I am so excited!
I also have pictures for this story that I've made, I've thought about eventually, once I have a picture for every chapter, making an official tumblr page for it, but I dunno. Maybe, maybe not, I will feel for it as I go along I suppose.
Anyways, I forgot the thank you's last chapter! I meant to continue on with the listed shout-outs, but I got distracted with the O.C. list. The shout outs will go on in this chapter and so forth! I thought about just updating the last chapter with it, but if anyone who is on the list already read it, that wouldn't be fair. I'd rather them see their name freshly on the list on their first read through of the chapter, hence why I've chosen to simply continue on with it here. So, onto the shout outs!
Thank you so much for following this story, from the twentieth to fortieth follower,
Yujiro101, arvizu923jenny, iHopPwns, lparsons96(I took out your email tag to show up), pegasiger
AerieBell, Anime-girl-next-door, InuYoukaiKagome, Sageofchaos, judzea
viha, MaidMaliya, VaMpIr3 pRiNc3sS, frivoloushag, prischoo926
Chrissy234life, Junia Grey, Undertheskys, mayrosa0710, Carastarr
Thank you, everyone, for following again, it means a lot to me! Less than three!
Now onto review replies.
To Talawolfgirl: Thank you so very much! Less than three.
To CatPeach: -Well, first off, thank you very much for giving my story a chance! It is really all I could ever ask for.
-On happily ever afters, Although there will be two bitter endings for part one and two(All parts will be in this story and not separated, just in my outline, I have it listed as three different parts, if this were a real book, it would be three books), the third part, the very ending, I think it will be happy, to an extent. I will have to tie up a loose end that the show itself leaves me, I think its an obvious question, but if not, then I don't want to say. Surprises are always better I think when reading. Anyways, I do want a happy ending for this story, but I want to make the sad and upsetting parts extreme in the taste that they are, as I believe that will make the happy parts more meaningful for better or worse.
-In this story, Kagome is meant to break the cycle of what has been repeated over and over, I would say more, but again, I do not want to reveal too much.
-Your compliment to me being a good writer is held carefully in my heart, it makes me very happy to be complimented so. Thank you so very much!
-I also wanted to say that I started Kagome off being very humble I think because I feel that she is in the show, I wanted to start with the characters in their raw form from the show and have them grow and change over time. In many writing guides, it has told me that a story is no good if the characters are still the same old people by the very end. I hope to make Kagome grow more confident as time goes on, however, untrained and unknowing of how many of her abilities work, I think she definitely would underestimate herself, I would in her position. However, she has been training and learning and getting better. Just as any other character in the show, she has earned the right to be a little cocky I think. She needed to find trust in herself that she could fight alongside others without being a crutch, which she is now standing directly in that position I think.
-Sorry for such a long reply, your review really got me thinking. I was babysitting the night you reviewed and it was getting much later than I was told it would be for and I was getting irritated, but then I received your review and I wanted to just say that it made me so ecstatic and brightened my day right up. Thank you again, so much.
To Undertheskys: Thank you so much! Less than three. I hope this chapter was good too and that you continue enjoying it. Here is the next update and hopefully the next chapter will be out soon too. I've had to slow down my updates a bit due to life just being, well, life. However, I'm trying my best to get these written, edited, and posted. I always try to make sure it is the best it could be, so it takes a bit of time. Thank you again so much for your review.
To Veraozao: Thank you so much for your wonderful reviews. Hope you enjoyed this chapter.
To One2Handcuff: Thank you so much! If you could see my smile, I'll tell you, it's unnaturally wide and probably creepy, but I am so very happy when you say that you love my story! Thank you!
-Also, I do not want to reveal much, but I did want to say, they did try to read the book right after, I had planned on having it in a flashback. I hope that is not too much of a spoiler. Of course, you still don't know the contents yet, so again, hopefully not too big of a spoiler.
-Also, now Inuyasha and Kikyo aren't so much of a thing. Inuyasha is hard-headed and in this story, he really does love Kikyo, but now that he feels that his beast can overtake him at any time, he thinks it would be safer her with her gone. Of course, that's no good either, because Kikyo is now a very scorned woman and scorned women can be dangerous, well as least, definitely when their Kikyo. I'm probably saying too much, but I get excited and can't help it.
-Anyways, thank you so much again! I hope this chapter was a good follow-up from the last.