The snow crunched beneath our boots as we walked toward the schoolhouse. Our breath came out in puffs in the cold January air. Jack held Jane tight to his chest, a blanket bundled around her.
He passed her to me when we reached the steps. "Are you sure you don't want to leave her with Abigail or Rosemary?"
"Yes, I'm sure. Rosemary already has her hands full with Patrick, and regardless of where Jane's at, she's going to be interfering with someone's job. It might as well be mine. Besides, the children are already used to her being around."
Chief sat just inside the doorway, waiting to walk to the jail with Jack.
Jack put some wood into the stove, starting a fire to heat the room. "She's not going to be content to stay in the cradle all day now that she's more active."
"I know. I brought some toys for her, and I can always hold her if I need to." I wiped her nose with a handkerchief. "The real challenge will be when she starts crawling, which could be any day now. She's been pushing herself up on her hands and knees a lot more lately."
She wiggled in my arms, and I set her down on a blanket beside the desk. I took a few blocks from my basket and placed them in front of her.
Jack smiled as he watched her bring a block to her mouth. "I can't believe how big she's gotten."
"Almost seven months old. Hard to believe it. Before we know it, it'll be her first birthday." I smiled sadly and moved to my desk, getting everything ready for the day. The more Jane grew, the more I was reminded that we weren't any closer to having a second child. Tears filled my eyes, and I sniffed.
"Elizabeth, are you okay?"
I quickly wiped my eyes and turned to face him. "I'm fine."
"You're not fine. What's going on?"
"It's silly."
He stepped over and put his hands on my shoulders. "If it's bothering you, it's not silly."
I leaned into him. "I know we've only been trying for another baby for a few months, but I'm really getting worried that it hasn't happened yet. It was so fast with Jane, I guess I've just been expecting that it would be that easy this time, too. Before Christmas, when I was having all those nightmares, I was kind of hoping it was a symptom, since I had so many nightmares before Jane was born. But it was just another disappointment." I sighed, my voice shaking. "Every month that passes, I lose a little more hope."
He put his hand on my stomach. "We will have another baby, Elizabeth. I know we will."
"I feel selfish for being so upset about this. We're so blessed to have each other and Jane. You two have made my life so wonderful, I feel like I'm asking for too much in wanting another baby so badly."
"Elizabeth," he kissed me softly, "you are not selfish for wanting another baby. I want another baby, too. You have no idea how much I want another baby. I don't think it means that we love each other or Jane any less. In fact, I think we want another baby because we love each other so much, not because our lives aren't fulfilling enough right now."
"Jack Thornton," I snuggled further into his embrace, "I don't know how it's possible, but I think I fall more in love with you every day."
Suddenly, my attention was drawn to something tugging on my skirt. I glanced down to see Jane sitting at my feet, shoving a handful of fabric into her mouth.
I gasped. "Jack!"
"What?" He obviously had not caught on to the significance of the moment.
"Look how far we're standing from the blanket." I pointed at the blanket where Jane had been playing just a few moments before. It was a good four or five feet away from where Jack and I stood.
"Yes…?"
"She crawled, Jack!"
"And we missed it?!" He lifted our daughter from the ground after carefully extracting my skirt from her mouth. "Jane Elizabeth, did you start crawling when mama and daddy weren't paying attention? Can you do it again?" He moved around the desk and placed her in the aisle between the benches.
He stepped back, and we both knelt in front of the desk.
"Come on, Janie. Come to mama."
She just stared at us, unsure of what was happening.
"Come here, baby girl. Show us how you can crawl."
Finally, she pushed herself up on her hands and knees, hesitantly moving forward.
"That's it, Janie! You can do it!"
Jack picked her up the moment she reached us. "Good job, Janie!" He looked over at me, a grin covering his face. "Now I'm too excited to go to work."
"Just a few hours, and then you'll come to walk us home. Then we can spend the whole evening watching her crawl."
"If she wants to. She might tire herself out crawling all around here." He laughed.
"Goodness, I hope not. I'm not going to have the energy to chase her around all day."
"Well, good luck." He kissed Jane's cheek before passing her to me. "I'll see you this afternoon."
I kissed him softly. "I love you."
"I love you, too."
I watched him walk out the door with Chief on his heels. Once the door closed, I placed Jane back on the floor, letting her crawl around until it was time to begin class.
...
I wiped down the chalkboard while Jane slept peacefully in her cradle.
Thankfully, she had stayed close to me throughout the day, and I never had to chase her down. She had been a little clingy and wanted to be held more than normal, which I imagined had to do with the two teeth that were starting to appear in her mouth.
I heard the door open just as I was carefully lifting her from the cradle. She shifted in my arms, waking momentarily before closing her eyes again.
When I turned around, I noticed that Jack wasn't alone.
"Charlotte?"
"Hello, Lizzy." She smiled. "Is this my granddaughter you've written me so much about?" She approached me and gently touched Jane's cheek.
I nodded. "This is Jane Elizabeth Thornton." I passed Jane to her, taking care not to wake her.
"She's beautiful. Almost seven months old?"
"Yes, and she just started crawling today." The pride was evident on Jack's face.
"I'm sorry that she's asleep right now. She usually doesn't nap at this time, but she's teething, and that's messed up her whole schedule."
Charlotte just nodded, keeping her eyes on the baby in her arms. "I remember those days." She smiled at her granddaughter. "She has Jack's nose."
"You can't tell right now, but she has his eyes, too, and his dimples. Not to mention his personality."
"Oh, dear." She laughed softly. "I'm sorry about that."
"Hey, I'm standing right here." Jack feigned offense.
"Oh, son. You know we both love you."
I grinned at him, and he rolled his eyes playfully.
"What do you say we all head over to the café for an early dinner? I'm sure Abigail is itching to see Jane again."
"Sounds good to me. Lead the way, son."
Charlotte handed Jane back to me, and I leaned her against my shoulder. Thankfully, she still didn't wake.
Jack held out one arm for Charlotte, sliding his other around my waist.
Tiny snowflakes were falling from the sky, forming a fresh layer of snow atop that which had fallen overnight. We were all quiet as we walked, taking in the magic of another Hope Valley winter.
It seemed that the rest of the town had the same idea as we did. When we arrived at the café, nearly every table was full. Jack found an empty one by the window, and we quickly claimed it.
Rosemary and Lee sat at the table beside us, Patrick perched in Lee's lap. They greeted us as we took our seats, Rosemary standing to hug Charlotte. Patrick was giggling as he tapped a spoon against the table.
"Who is this?" Charlotte turned to Rosemary, immediately enraptured by the youngest Coulter.
"Our son," Rosemary beamed, "Patrick Coulter."
"Oh, congratulations to both of you. I had no idea."
Rosemary reached across the table and touched her son's cheek. "We weren't having any luck having our own children, so we adopted Patrick a few months ago."
"That's wonderful."
"Patrick is only two months older than Jane. You should see them play together. It's the sweetest thing." I shifted the baby in my arms as she began to stir.
Jack touched my shoulder. "I'll go see if Abigail has something mashed for Jane."
I nodded, rubbing Jane's back as she started to fuss quietly. Charlotte continued to chat with Rosemary, getting caught up on everything that had happened since she had last been to town.
Jack returned a few moments later, carrying a small dish. "You're in luck, Janie." He slid into the chair beside me. "Abigail had some yummy sweet potatoes ready for you." He scooped some onto a spoon and held it up to her mouth. Jane just turned her head away and continued fussing. "Come on, Janie. You love sweet potatoes." He tried a few more times with the same result.
"I'll just go in the back and feed her. It's no use fighting her."
"Okay." He touched her cheek and smiled sadly. "I'm sorry you aren't feeling well, Janie."
Her cries were growing louder as I stepped through the curtain and into the kitchen. "Hi, Abigail. Do you mind if I feed her in here? She didn't want the sweet potatoes."
"Go ahead. You know where the blanket is."
I situated myself on the sofa, wondering how many times I had fed Jane in that spot. It was like our second home.
She settled in quickly, obviously much more content than she had been in the dining room. "It makes me sad that you aren't feeling well, Janie. I hope you don't feel like this with all of your teeth. Although, I do like that you've been extra snuggly today. I know that as you get older, you won't want mama to hold you as much." She found a lock of my hair and gripped it tightly while she filled her belly.
A few minutes later, Clara stepped through the door.
"Hello, Clara. It's good to see you."
"You too."
"You look wonderful. How are you feeling?"
"Thank you, Elizabeth. I'm feeling much better than I was the first couple of months." She smiled and sank into the seat across from me, rubbing her hand across her growing stomach. She was nearly five months along now, and she was positively glowing.
"So, do you have any feelings about whether it's a boy or a girl?"
She shook her head. "Not really. But even if I did, I wouldn't put much stock in it. If I remember correctly, you were certain that Jane was a boy." She smirked.
I laughed quietly. "I wish people would forget about that already." Jane had finished eating, so I lifted her to my shoulder, where she quickly fell asleep. "When are you due again?"
"The end of May or early June. We aren't completely sure."
"So you're about halfway there. That's exciting."
She grinned. "I'm just so ready to meet this little one. I think Jesse is getting more nervous the closer it gets, though."
"Oh, the nerves are completely normal. I don't think he would admit it, but Jack was terrified before Jane was born."
"Did I hear my name?" Jack poked his head through the curtain. "Hi, Clara. Sorry to interrupt. I just wanted to see how you're doing back here."
I nodded toward Jane. "She's got a full belly and is sleeping soundly now."
"Elizabeth, if you need to get back out there, you can. I don't want to keep you."
"Thank you, Clara." I stood slowly, shifting Jane in my arms. "You take care of yourself and that baby, now."
"I will. It was good to see you."
"You, as well."
Jack put his hand on my back as we returned to our table. Abigail had just delivered three bowls of stew for us and Charlotte, and we all enjoyed the hearty meal and the company.
...
"Hi." Jack stood in the doorway of Jane's room.
"Hi." I gave him a slight smile and turned my attention back to Jane. Her fingers grazed the edge of my blouse. I could tell she wasn't hungry anymore, but I couldn't bring myself to put her down knowing she wasn't feeling well.
"My mom is settled in the guest room." Jack knelt beside the rocking chair and brushed the hair from Jane's forehead. "She feels warm."
"That's normal when they're teething." I touched her cheek, noticing how flushed it was. "She wanted to be held a lot more than normal today."
"That's probably better than you having to chase her around now that she's crawling."
I laughed softly. "Yes. I just hate that she's not feeling well, though."
"Would you feel better if I put the cradle back in our room so she could sleep with us tonight?"
I nodded. "Yes, please."
He kissed my forehead. "I'll be right back."
Jane was still awake, but just barely. Her eyelids were drooping, her little fingers twitching.
I touched her cheek. "I'm sorry you aren't feeling well, sweet Janie. We're going to let you sleep in our room tonight, just in case you need us."
Her eyes shut and her breathing slowed. I wrapped her in a light blanket before carrying her across the hall. Jack had placed the cradle beside the bed so I could easily check on her throughout the night.
"Thank you." I lowered her into the cradle and watched her for a few moments, making sure that she would stay asleep.
Jack sat on the edge of the bed, removing his jacket and boots.
I sighed as I pulled my nightgown from the wardrobe. "Jack, I've been thinking. Maybe we should just stop actively trying for another baby. I'm getting stressed that it's not happening, and I'm sure that isn't good for me."
"Are you sure?"
I nodded glumly. "Maybe in a few months, we can start trying again. For now, we can just focus on work and on Jane."
"Okay, if that's what you want." He tucked a strand of hair behind my ear.
"It's not really what I want, but I think it's for the best. I even went to see Carson and Faith the other day, and they said as far as they can tell, there's no real reason why it hasn't happened."
He pulled me into his arms. "I wish there was something I could do to make you feel better."
I leaned into his chest, allowing the beating of his heart to relax me. "You make me feel better just by being you."
He kissed the top of my head. "I love you, Elizabeth."
"I love you, too."
