It's just a stupid necklace.
A super expensive, stupid necklace.
But here Brittany is standing outside of the Jane's Jewelers with her necklace. No, Santana's necklace and she can't bring herself to just walk in there and tell the lady she needs to return it.
She feels like the lady is already judging her. Like she already knows that Brittany is too poor to give her girlfriend anything she deserves, that she'll never be good enough. She feels like she's sitting back in those desks in high school and she just wishes it would stop.
But this is real life. And she needs her car and she needs the money to fix her car and maybe one day people will be nicer and she won't have to worry about fixing things mean people break because they won't be around to break them anymore.
She takes a deep breath and pushes through the door. She's glad the store is empty besides the older woman behind the counter. She's got a tiny pair of glasses stuck to the end of her noise and she's staring down at a set of rings that are still inside their black velvet cases. Her short dirty blonde hair falls just below the raised shoulder of her pink suit jacket.
When she peeks over her glasses to see Brittany she gives her the same straight smile that Brittany imagines she uses for all the clients. She remembers it from the last time she was in here when she bought the necklace. The lady was smart and spewed out all the facts about diamonds and reflection and carets and size. It was almost too much detail but she refused to give Brittany an opinion like when she refused to answer whether or not a necklace would look good on someone with darker skin or if this other necklace looked a little bit too much like something her grandmother would wear. Brittany assumed she just wasn't that much into giving advice.
The way the woman studied Brittany the entire walk over made her stomach churn. She feels like she's walking down a long alley and its takes so much longer to get there than she thought it would. She reached the end of the counter and paused to swallow the spit that's lodged itself in the back of her throat.
"Can I help you?" The women asked. Brittany watched as her eyes fell to the necklace in Brittany's hand.
"I need to return this." Brittany said.
The woman gestured for Brittany to bring the necklace up to where she can see it. And Brittany does.
The woman inspects the necklace with a curt nod and grabbed the recipe from Brittany's hand.
She eyed Brittany over the top of the tiny paper. "May I ask why?"
Brittany swallowed again. This was the one question she had been dreading. What does she say? She's too embarrassed to tell the truth.
"I-" Brittany stumbled. She can't think of what to say besides the truth and the thought of telling this stranger that kills her.
The woman's head tilted to the side and if she still weren't so tight-lipped Brittany would almost mistake the gesture for compassion.
"Not what you were looking for?" The woman said over her shoulder as he made her way towards the cash register on the other side of the counter. Brittany followed her.
Brittany nodded even though the woman was looking down at the register. She punched in a couple of numbers before she held out her hand and demanded Brittany's credit card. Brittany fumbled in her purse before she actually produced it.
It took just a quick swipe of a card and a signature on a recipe and the woman sends Brittany on her way with a nod.
Brittany left feeling like it was much easier than she expected it to be.
She is standing in front of Burt Hummel and hour later, approving the bodywork that needs to be done and signing off on the tires that need to be ordered.
Santana's is pretty sure that Rachel fucking Berry is the bane of her existence.
Having her in this talent show is both the best and the worst thing that has ever happened to her. She'll give the dwarf credit, she knows much more about putting on a show then Santana does. Santana never thought she'd need a light crew or a sound crew or any sort of crew but Rachel fucking Berry is all over that shit. She gets some twerps from McKinley High School to volunteer and she managed to get them to work for fucking free and Santana won't lie, she's totally impressed by that.
Then there's the other end of the spectrum. The spectrum where Rachel fucking Berry calls Santana every night and on the nights that Santana turned her phone off to avoid talking to Rachel fucking Berry for three hours about her diaphragm, she instead finds the girl standing on her doorstep and suddenly she's in Santana's room babbling about Finn or about this show and complaining about how little the rest of the performers are practicing. Santana isn't really sure when her and Rachel became best friends (again!) but she would very much like it to stop please.
It's not even the high-pitched voice or the incessant talking that gets to Santana. It's when Rachel accidently mentions Brittany and then shies away from the conversation but then doesn't really because Santana knows Rachel secretly except not-so-secretly wants to talk about it and it's the last thing Santana wants to talk about right now, especially with Rachel fucking Berry.
Then again part of her wants to talk about it. She starting to feel like she lost her girlfriend except she hasn't yet. She just feels like she's just waiting for the axe to drop and Brittany's just being nice because Brittany's always nice and she doesn't want to break up with her right before this big event. She isn't sure where she went so wrong and she isn't sure she knows what to do anymore and then she finds herself wondering if it might be a goood idea to talk to Rachel.
And then it just happened.
It was the night when her dad was working at the hospital and her mother was at some book club thing (because she does that now) and Rachel fucking Berry was sitting on her bed practicing her notes even though they just had that stupid fucking dress rehearsal that she had insisted one and Santana found herself staring down at her phone reading Brittany's Facebook for the twenty-thousandth time even though Brittany hasn't posted in a week and she's just thinking about it and the question bursts out of her before she can stop it.
"Is Brittany going to break up with me?" Santana said. She cringed instantly and tried to keep her eyes focused on her phone screen where Brittany's smiling face is staring back at her.
Part of her hopes that Rachel will pretend she never said anything but she knows that's not the case especially when Rachel already stopped her practicing and she's staring at Santana with the widest and saddest eyes.
"Why would you think that?" Rachel makes a move to stand but then decides to plant her feet and just turn her body to face her.
Santana is thankful for her self-control.
"We haven't spoken." Santana started. She isn't really sure what had possessed her to speak to Rachel Berry of all people but here she is and she's already knee deep, she can't turn back now.
"Have you called her?" Rachel asked.
She can see the way Rachel frowns when Santana shakes her head.
"Well how can you guys talk about it if you don't call her." Rachel puts her hands on her hips as she talks and Santana kind of wants to smack her even though Santana knows she's right.
Rachel pointed down at the phone Santana was holding in her hand like it's that easy. Like she can just dial Brittany's number, let it ring a couple of times and hear that sweet, sweet voice again and everything would be just fine.
Part of her wishes it were that easy.
"I can't." Santana feels the defeated words slip out of her mouth and she regrets them instantly. She's baring her soul to Rachel fucking Berry and she herself so much right now.
"Why?" Rachel stood this time and took a few steps closer before she grabbed ahold of herself. Santana refused to look up into those concerning eyes again.
"Because she'll break up with me." Santana said.
"So you're just going to sit in this non-talking, I-Don't-Know-If-We're-Still-Dating stage for the rest of your life?" Rachel said.
Santana can see the way Rachel holds her hands at her hips again.
"Yes." Santana answered.
Santana heard a puff of air escape from Rachel's lips. "That's ridiculous."
Santana looked up in time to see Rachel bringing her own phone to her ear. Santana reached up to snatch it away but the little gremlin is way too fast. And fuck, she can already hear it ringing.
Santana's ears already perk up at the voice through the speakers, She sounds groggy and Santana almost forgets how late its been and how early Brittany's goes to bed on dance rehearsal days.
"Please hang up." Santana whispered but Rachel pretended to ignore her. She held the phone out to Santana and Santana can hear Brittany calling to Rachel on the other end.
I can't. Santana mouths even as she took the phone Rachel had offered her.
"You can." Rachel said.
And just like that, it's that easy. Santana brought the phone to her ear and is thankful when Rachel turned back to collect her things, at least she can't watch the way Santana is shaking with panic.
"Hello." Santana practically croaked into the phone.
"Santana?" Brittany called. Santana can almost close her eyes and picture the way Brittany rubs her eyes when she's just woken in the morning.
"Yeah." Santana managed to get out.
"How are you?" Brittany asked. Santana doesn't want to get ahead of herself but she can swear she hears a smile in Brittany's voice. It's enough to give her a little edge of confidence.
"I've been really busy with this talent show." Santana said the only thing she knows is true. She can't find it in her to lie to Brittany. Not now.
"That's tomorrow right?" Brittany says nonchalantly but it makes Santana think that its probably penned on the calendar Brittany keeps pinned to her fridge so she doesn't forget what day it is.
"Yeah its tomorrow." Santana said. "Were you-" Part of Santana doesn't want to assume that Brittany would have planned to come see her. Not now. "Were you going to come see Rachel perform?"
"Of course." Brittany responded.
Santana's almost positive she heard a smile poking through the phone this time.
"Good." Santana said but she meant to say so much more, she wanted to say so much more. "I can't wait to see you there." She eternally kicks herself for being so forward but then she hears Brittany's response.
"I can't wait to see you either." Brittany said and Santana knew she meant it.
"I'll let you go back to bed. I'm sorry I woke you." Santana ignored the way Rachel was practically jumping up in down in front of her bedroom door.
"It was nice being woken up by you." Brittany said. "Good night, Santana."
"Good night, Brittany." Santana said.
Her hands are shaking. She's pretty sure everyone can see the way her hands won't stop shaking. She can't fuck this up. She's been planning this event for so long and she can't fuck it up but now she's standing outside the entrance of McKinley High School and the volunteers are set up inside to take names and the vendors have already set up their tables for the auction and all she had left to do it to wait for the guests to show.
Just wait and greet. That's all she has to do.
Well that and panic.
And she's really fucking good at panicking.
That doubt is creeping up into the pit of her stomach and she's pretty sure no one is going to fucking come to this stupid thing and all the businesses that donated shit are just going to take it back and be pissed off at her and Your Team is going to become a joke and David is going to be so mad and…
Brittany's here.
Oh God, Brittany's here.
The first car pulled into the parking lot and it's carrying Brittany of all people. Well it's also carrying Rachel and Kurt but she barely takes notice because… Brittany.
Brittany strides over to Santana with her long fluid movements. It's almost hypnotizing the way she moves sometimes and part of her thinks Brittany is doing that completely on purpose. But when Santana glances up to catch those beautiful blue eyes she can see the way Brittany's still staring at the ground and the feeling settles back into Santana's gut when she realizes that they still need to talk and that weirdness between them still isn't completely settled.
But Brittany still hugs her in that way Brittany always does and suddenly everything feels easier and better when Santana settles into Brittany's arms. She forgot how at home she felt with her. She forgot how easily Brittany made everything better. She knows they still need to talk, she knows they still have things to settle everything that happened between them but she also knows that Brittany's trusting her right now and holding her and she knows that Brittany's way of calming her down and letting her know that everything's okay for now.
And Santana will be forever thankful for that.
Santana glanced up from Brittany's shoulder and saw Rachel and Kurt standing in front of the familiar car. It looks shiny and new under what had to be gallons of body paint to cover the offensive red spray paint.
"Your car." Santana blurted out. She pushed back from Brittany to get a better look at her face.
"How did you-"
"I got it fixed." Brittany interrupted in a final tone.
Santana tried to catch Brittany's eyes but she wouldn't look at her as she spoke. Santana let the subject drop. She wouldn't dare play too close to the edge when she was so close to maybe getting Brittany back.
"Did you want to come inside?" Santana asked. She gestured towards the front doors that led to the Auditorium hallway and the volunteers with signup sheets and name tags because according to Rachel fucking Berry those things were super important.
Brittany nodded. She held Santana's hand loosely as she let herself be led to the sign up table.
Santana still felt like Brittany was miles away but at least she could see her. At least she was still here. Maybe then she felt like there was a chance.
After she got Brittany signed up and fitted with a name tag she lead her through the hallway where the vendors were still setting up their donations for auction. She was guiding Brittany down the hallway telling her a nightmare story about one vendor that made ridiculous requests from soda type to exact thermostat temperatures she felt her arm tug backwards when Brittany's feet suddenly decided to stop moving.
Brittany was staring down at one of the vendor's tables. Santana took a few steps backwards and a beautiful diamond necklace started to sparkle even under the harsh light of the hallway. Santana couldn't blame Brittany for staring. The necklace was absolutely gorgeous.
It was a late donation, Santana didn't even have a chance to see a picture of it but when a vendor calls you up and offers a diamond necklace and then mentions the retail value, you find a way to pencil them into the program.
"Pretty." Santana said.
Brittany practically jumped out of her stupor.
"What?" She said.
She looked down at her the necklace and then back at Santana. "Yeah, really pretty." She trailed off before she looked back down at the table. She was so obviously avoiding eye contract.
Santana let out a laugh. "I can't believe she just donated it." She whispered as she gently tugged Brittany away. "You wouldn't believe what that thing was worth."
She didn't understand why Brittany frowned the way she did at that statement.
It was a good thing that Santana got people to donate expensive things to her charity event.
Right?
She looked over her shoulder a few times when they hit the near empty hallway. She still can't place Brittany's mood and suddenly she feels like she's about to get some bad news just by the way Brittany looks like she's trying to stop herself from crying.
"I know I suck…" Brittany started. Santana shook her head in reaction because Brittany far from sucks.
"And I know we're having these mess of problems-" Brittany begins.
"Santana!"
Santana cringes on instinct not only because of the cause of the voice but because of the absolute worst possible timely that Rachel fucking Berry always seems to have. Santana refuses to take her eyes off of Brittany, she stares back at her begging her to continue, begging for this all to be alright again and begging Rachel to take a hint for once and go away.
"SANTANA!" Rachel bellows.
No such luck. Santana has no choice but to answer.
"What-Do-You-Want?" Santana called through gritted teeth. The deer-in-headlights look on Rachel's face proves that she finally realizes that she just did something stupid.
"Some delivery guys are here with some food." Rachel's voice falls a few dozens decibels and Santana now struggles to ever hear her. "Where should they put it?"
"The teacher's lounge." She answers quickly before she turned back to Brittany and waits for her to continue.
Brittany opened her mouth to speak but it's Rachel's voice she hears again.
"Are you sure?" It's louder again and even more annoying this time. "Because I told them the Glee Club room since it's so much bigger."
Santana is pretty sure she's going to explode and strangle Rachel with her bare hands. "You just want it in there so you can brag about your stupid trophies. Put them in the teacher's lounge, everything else they need is already there."
She can see Rachel nodding out of the corner of her eyes and smiles when she sees Rachel shrink back down the hallway. Santana finally turns back to Brittany.
It's Santana who opens her mouth to speak but it's Brian she hears now.
"Santana do you know where those tax forms went- oh?" Brian freezes a couple of steps away and Santana throws her hand up in defeat.
Brittany laughs her whimsical little laugh and Santana is slowly starting to feel like things might actually be okay.
"Later." Brittany mouths before she gestures back towards the chaos in the hallway.
Santana gives her an apologetic look before she slips away, leading Brian directly to the pile of forms he left sitting on the sign up table a half hour ago.
So Brittany is pretty sure someone up there hates her, or is torturing her for some odd reason because she's staring at that same damn necklace. Santana's necklace. It's just sitting there on a pretty black velvet stand in front of a blank piece of paper with blank lines and empty spots for dollar signs and Brittany finds herself wishing she had something she could bid but she barely has a dollar to her name anymore after getting her car fixed and she remembers all the wonderful things Santana deserves that she can't afford to buy.
And then she noticed the lady standing behind the table and it's the same woman who helped her return the necklace in the first place. That just makes everything worse. Brittany can't tell if she's judging because she's got that stupid little straight smile on her face and Brittany doesn't know what it's supposed to mean.
They lock eyes for a second before Brittany wrenches herself from the guilt soaked stare and walks back down the hallway keeping her gaze locked straight ahead, not daring to look at all the other things she knows she never be able to afford for Santana.
So the minutes before the show opened were absolute chaos, but Santana feels like a week stuck with Rachel Berry has prepared her for a week of pure fucking disasters. There were fights over sparkles and mascara (and that was just the drag queens), broken guitar strings and a nervous Puck that was downing a full flask way too quickly. Once that all ended and Rachel Berry opened the talent show with a huge bellowing number and a standing ovation, Santana was starting to feel comfortable with how things were going.
When she finally took a moment to stare into the crowd she realized that every single seat was full. There were people in business suits, reporters with pens and pads, photographers with huge fancy cameras and teenagers in band t-shirts, jocks in varsity letters, teachers pretending to be one of the cool kids and everyone else in between and the room was so packed that the walls of the auditorium were lined with people and others were sitting in the middle of the aisles and Santana was pretty sure she was breaking about fifty different fire codes right now.
But they were clapping and they were cheering and by the looks of it they were buying and they were bidding and Santana was having a good day. She was having a really good fucking day. And then just before intermission when the drag queens were doing a rather raunchy performance of Katy Perry's California Girls, Brian handed Santana an envelope with the listing of the auction winners and a little post-it with the current profits and Santana was pretty sure she was going to vomit.
She didn't think she would have come close to a number with so many zeros. She doesn't really know how it could be possible.
"Apparently people overbid." Brian said when Santana finally managed to question it. "Charity." He added with a smirk and a shrug.
"Oh." She blurted out as she looked back down at the gigantic number. She looked back out at the crowd and finally it h it her just how big this thing turned out to be. Before she could realize what was happening the last act before intermission was rushing off stage and Brian was pushing her gently from behind and into the swarming crowd.
"Speech." Brian listed into her ear as he pushed her through the Curtain. "Then the auction winners." He said after he shoved a microphone and a sheet of paper in her hands.
Then she was out there. Standing in front of a huge crowd and everyone was staring at her waiting for her to say something funny and witty and Santana felt like she completely forgot the speech her and Brian had been practicing for weeks.
Well…
Fuck…
Then like a magnet she found a familiar set of blue eyes in the audience sitting in the middle row, fifth seat from the aisle and Brittany winked and smiled at her and for the first time in a long time Santana started to feel like everything was actually going to be okay. She took a deep breath, popped out her chest and started talking to Brittany.
"I want to thank you for coming out here tonight. I know there are just so many sights and sounds and wonderful smells to take in here in Lima, Ohio but we are really honored that you decided to spend your night here with me at McKinley High." The audience vibrated with the sound of chuckles and clapping.
She could do this.
She managed to throw in a couple more Lima, Ohio zingers and they seemed to get more and more laughter before she eased into the heavier stuff. Melanie and the statistics and the sad fact that now Melanie was one of those statistics and there was nothing they could do but prevent others from joining her. Santana felt like she was really getting through. She felt the eyes watching her and nodding along with her calls to action and petition and instead of making her nervous, it only made her more confident. They were really listening to her. Maybe she had a chance to really make a difference here. Maybe she could really move that boulder.
When she finally stopped talking she realized she was completely out of breath. She took a few heavy breaths before the audience started to erupt into applause.
The applause lasted for a couple of minutes but it felt like hours, people rose to their feet and they clapped louder and heavier and she even heard a wolf whistle (she was pretty sure that was Puck.) She found Brittany in the crowd and saw the proudest little smile on her face.
That's when she knew.
Things were changing. She could feel it inside her and she feel it changing inside the crowd.
Part of her wishes she could have run off stage after the applause. It felt awkward to make everyone sit back down as she drummed out the boring list of cooking sets and autographed baseball cards and waited for the winner to trot up so the vendor could proudly hand over their donated merchandise.
But she guessed it was all supposed to be part of the fun.
She was barely paying any attention to her list until she saw that beautiful diamond necklace being held in front of her on the stage.
Then she gazed down at her sheet and her eyes went wide when she saw the winning bid.
"We would like to thank Jane's Jewelers for donating this beautiful diamond necklace." Santana was still processing all those zeros, the words she spoke practically tripped out of her mouth. The winning bid had to be easily double the retail value and maybe the most money contributed to Your Team the entire day. She coughed to clear her throat. She probably shouldn't be counting the money before they even had it yet. "The winner of this necklace is… Jane?" Santana read over the list again and again and then looked back up at the older woman that was holding the box up for the audience.
Santana put her hand over the microphone to shield her voice from the crowd. "You bid on your own necklace?" She whispered.
She was confused by the straight indefinable smile that crossed Jane's lips. She held her hand out for the microphone and Santana handed it to her without question.
"I bought my own necklace." Jane said in affirmation. There were a few grumbles from the crowd that were quickly silenced when Jane spoke again. "But I didn't buy it for myself."
"A few weeks ago, a young blonde girl came into my shop. She bought a necklace from me. She bought this necklace." Jane held the necklace up for the crowd to see. Everyone seemed to lean in just a bit closer. "She wouldn't stop talking about her girlfriend and how hard she'd been working and how much she thought she deserved it." Santana felt Jane gesture towards her and she felt her stomach twist just a little bit. "To be honest I was caught a little off guard by it. I don't get many gay couples in my store." She froze for a second before she corrected herself. "Well maybe not many as open and upfront as she was. But then she was back a couple of days ago. I could see the tears in her eyes and I just knew that even though this young woman didn't have the money she deserved to have this necklace." The woman searched the crowd until her eyes found a wide-eyed Brittany in the middle row. "Brittany this is my gift to you."
She held the box up until Brittany took the cue from the staring audience members and started to climb over the other people in her row as she made her way up to the stage. She hopped onto the top stage with a finesse only Brittany could possess and strode across the stage before she hesitantly wrapped her fingers around the box. She muttered a tearful thank you and wrapped her hands around the neck of the woman and she brought her into one of Brittany's signature power hugs.
She held onto the woman for a good long minute before she started to pull back. Santana could make out words on Brittany's lips as she whispered something into the woman's ear.
She could hear the woman's laugh vibrating through the microphone still pressed against the small of Brittany's back.
"I kind of expected you to give it away." The woman said and for the first time Santana saw a real smile on her lips.
Santana saw Brittany start turn and start to stride over to her. She handed the box to Santana with a huge tearful smile on her face.
"I know it's just a necklace and I know you'd be mad at me for spending so much money and effort on it. But I want you to have nice things." Brittany said as she held up the box.
Santana smiled through the tears she didn't realize she was crying. The sudden lack of money, the fight over fixing car, it all made sense now. Brittany was taking care of her.
"You are my nice thing." Santana said.
Brittany wrapped her hands around Santana and brought her in close. She snuggled into the nape of Brittany's neck and whispered I Loves Yous over and over again. Because even without shiny diamonds and even in rough patches she knew she did and she knew she always would. And the way Brittany's embrace contracted at the end of every whisper made Santana feel the truth in her bones.
Brittany would always love her back.
This was meant to be. They were brought together for a reason and in God's twisted little way, they were meant to be and they found each other.
/* Author's Note: Thank you so much for sticking this out with me. I owe it to you guys to finish this especially when I'm so close. Minus this chapter there's the epilogue which I hope to post up much sooner than the gap between last chapter and this chapter. This story has been quiet an adventure for me and I learned a lot about myself when writing this and my life got a lot more hectic (as you can tell by the lack of updates) but once I finish this one I'm going to turn my attention to my other stories and finishing those up. Probably Down With The Sickness will be next.
I apologize again for the delay but thank you to those readers that reached out to me about an update. I didn't know so many people were missing out on this story but I'm updating for you guys. And once again thank you to all of you that read, review and follow. You're the ones that keep me inspired to continue.
*/