a/n: This chapter comes with a warning for suicidal themes, discussions of child abuse and general Emotional Distress. If there's anything else I should warn for and have not, please let me know.

It was curious how distance could affect a relationship. Galinda had drifted easily from friends and partners she hadn't made an effort to see, to reaffirm connections with. She had improved relationships, too, with distance. Her and her parents had gotten along much better in separate cities. She hadn't considered the function of distance despite these experiences.

Galinda had feared the undefined distance between Elphaba and her. Now defined, she found it unexpectedly pleasant. Particularly - exclusively - its effect on Elphaba. The ambiguity of their relationship had clearly been just as stressful for her. Within hours of their conversation she had become easier with Galinda and in fact the opposite of distant. So Galinda was mollified, despite the redefinition of their relationship.

Galinda recounted the conversation she'd had with Nessa to Elphaba. She was stupefied. "How in Oz do you manage to hold these conversations with Nessa? You seem… well, anything but friendly."

Galinda shrugged a shoulder. "We have at least one thing in common." She arched a playful brow at Elphaba, who laughed and flushed.

"There is that." Elphaba fell silent in thought. "Perhaps it is possible. For her to stay here, completely willingly."

"I think so. And I honestly think it would be the best thing for Nessa."

"Oh?"

"That house… it's not going to help her grieve. And without money it will just be you. Doesn't she - well, get a bit lonely?" Galinda asked, feeling bad for voicing it. "I know I would."

Elphaba's expression became soft. "She does…"

"Having someone like Turtle Heart - a benefactor to cover all those expenses - I think it'll really improve her life."

Elphaba nodded along distractedly. "You're right. I hadn't even considered that." She shook off whatever she was feeling. "In that case, we'll need to think of what will be moved up here, register her at the welfare office…" They fell into planning.

They asked Nessa, a couple of nights later, to join them in Turtle Heart's study. He had offered it as a quiet and out of the way place to have a proper, undisturbed discussion. They had talked to him here and there about their thoughts on the arrangement. He seemed indifferent to the details. "They are important, of course, but not so important, hm? To talk to Nessa is the most important." It was for nothing, after all, without her compliance.

Nessa looked confused but unsuspecting as they entered the study, perching herself on an armchair and looking between them curiously. Elphaba and Galinda exchanged glances. "We wanted to talk about future plans. Specifically where you're going to live."

"I see."

"Until recently, I had assumed I would be moving back to Colwen Grounds to take care of you. This is still an option, of course, but Turtle Heart has suggested and alternative." Elphaba paused. Nessa remained silent, expectant. "He has invited you to live here, with him."

Nessa blinked, taken aback. "Here?"

"Here." Elphaba saw she would lose Nessa if she let her draw her own conclusions, and continued on hastily. "He would provide support workers, tutors, transportation and mobility aids and furniture. He wouldn't force any kind of contact, and doesn't require legal status as a guardian. And you'd get to be in Quadling Country," Elphaba said with a smile, somewhat nervous. "It might be the best option."

Nessa seemed numbed. "And when would this arrangement begin?"

"From the twenty-fourth."

"A week! I see." Nessa was looking less numb now. "And when was this discussed?"

"Just a few days ago."

"Turtle Heart didn't want to come to me with this himself?"

"He realises we're closer and thought it better I come to you about this."

"I see. And you did not think to come to me about this earlier?" She was angry, Galinda realised. From the look on Elphaba's face, so had she. "You didn't think to talk to me about this two weeks ago, or right after dad had died?"

"We hadn't talked to Turtle Heart-"

"I mean about the issue in general," Nessa snapped. "We didn't talk about this once - where and how I would live - and now you've written out an itinerary for my life, down to the time and date, and I'm meant to just make a choice between two options?"

"I-if neither option appeals, we can-"

"That's not the bloody issue, Elphie!" Galinda flinched in sympathy for her. Nessa was sharp when she wanted to be. "We're talking about my life! Should I have not been informed earlier? Am I not an important part of the discussion?" Nessa turned on her. Galinda sat up, alarmed to be the focus of such an accusing glare. "And I suppose this was why you suggested I could live in Quadling Country after all?" Galinda chewed the inside of her lip, silent and guilty. Nessa rolled her eyes. "Incredible."

"I'm sorry, Nessa-"

"Your manipulation aside, I was not lying that day. I have enjoyed being here and consider Quadling Country special to me." She released a massive huff of air. "I will consider Turtle Heart's proposal and discuss this with him directly; I don't want either of you speaking on this issue again."

Elphaba's eyes widened, lurching forward. "Nessa, I'm still your guardian-"

"I don't care. You cut me out, I'm cutting you out." Nessa stood, swaying only minimally in her rigidness. "If you would please open the door for me, I am quite done with this conversation."

Elphaba opened the door. Nessa paused in the hall. "I lack arms, not autonomy," she said quietly.

Elphaba's face. Galinda felt her chest ache looking at it. "Nessa… I'm sorry-"

"Good night."

Elphaba closed the door once Nessa had marched out of sight. She ran her hand over her head, laughed shakily. "What a mess I've made."

"I am glad Nessa is talking to me, but I think it could have happened in a better way, hm?"

Galinda and Elphaba looked up from their respective books. Turtle Heart stood leaning in the doorway, his arms folded over his chest, looking at Elphaba with an exasperated fondness. She darkened, ashamed.

"Not one of my better moments as a sibling."

"No worry, you have many things occupying you now. It is not possible to get everything right."

Elphaba worked her jaw, her eyes falling to her lap. "But it is possible to get one thing right, at least? And yet..." Elphaba didn't give either of them the time to respond to that. "You've spoken to Nessa about her plans, then? What's been decided so far?"

"So hasty. These things will work out, Fabala. You should not worry."

"When it comes to Nessa all I do is worry," Elphaba said. "So?"

He looked amused. "We talked on what would happen if she stayed here. What she would be comfortable and not be comfortable with. We are thinking to rent her an apartment."

"Can you afford that?" Elphaba asked.

"Of course," Turtle Heart said quickly. "Is there a price to be put on feeling safe? I think no. I understand her discomfort with living in this house. I am almost a stranger…" His eyes flickered away at that, squinting, like a flinch.

"You're her father," Galinda said.

"Frex is her father. I am…" Turtle Heart shrugged. "A concerned kin. We will see."

"And how is she…?" Elphaba asked.

Turtle Heart smiled. "She is okay. She will come around to forgiveness fast I think. It would help, maybe, if you made a gesture of trust."

"Trust?"

"Trust for her independence."

Elphaba grimaced. "More than a gesture, I think. It's clear I must appreciate her independence more in general." Elphaba went back to her book. "The world underestimates her enough already. I should be the last person to perpetuate it."

Turtle Heart smiled, looking a lot like a proud father in that moment. He caught Galinda's eye and winked, then went off.

Galinda had been eavesdropping more than she'd like to admit recently.

She had come out of the bathroom along their hall of bedrooms and could hear, just around the corner, quiet conversation between Elphaba and Nessa. Galinda was a bit surprised they were talking at all, but she'd noticed that siblings had distinct relationships with distinct rules that she often did not understand.

"... wanted one more word on the matter, and then I promise I will stay out of it. Completely."

"You could stay out of it now."

"I know it seems as if I don't trust you. Perhaps that is something I need to work on, and if so I will. You're right, we should have talked about it ages ago. We should have talked about it when we were discussing me taking the Eminency."

The floor creaked. "Are you reconsidering?" Nessa asked quietly.

"... I'm not sure yet. I'm still reluctant to invite that much attention."

"Mm."

"But if I were to take care of you, I guess I would have to. Because I'm not enough."

There was a tense pause. "What?"

"I can't provide everything you'd need, Nessa. I can hold your back and turn your pages and make your tea. I practically can't wash you, because of my allergy, and I cannot provide you a life.

"You need more people than me. You need friends. Education. Activities. You've been isolated within the family for… years. And I know it terrifies you, the idea of us all moving apart."

"It doesn't terrify me…"

"It upsets you, then." There was a beat of silence, a confirmation. "And that is perfectly understandable. I will make efforts to keep in regular contact with you and Shell if we do all end up apart, and I hope you'd do the same. But there's so much more than us out there. We're safe, and that's nice, but… it's not what you need."

"And I'll find what I need here? With a stranger?"

"With support, Nessa. Because of your disability and how you've grown up all your life, you need that support. And that support costs money. Because the world is horrible and capitalist." A pause. "I'm getting off topic; what I mean is, for you, an apartment with support workers and a tutor… those are steps toward independence. True independence."

"What independence?" Nessa hissed. "Being paid for by some man I have no relationship with. That is the opposite of independence. Have you not considered he may take advantage?"

"If he does, you can tell me and I will be with you in a second," Elphaba said. "That said, I trust Turtle Heart… and you know how stingy I am with my trust."

Nessa made a kind of amused scoffing noise. "That's true."

"Listen, Nessa…" Elphaba spoke with a gentleness she reserved for no one but her sister. "You know if you ask me to move and care for you, I would in a heartbeat."

"I know," Nessa said in a small voice.

"But I really think staying here - with all the benefits Turtle Heart is very generously offering - would be best for both of us. I won't draw away from you, Nessa. Never."

"You promise?" Nessa asked firmly.

"I promise."

"... Alright. I'll keep that in mind."

There was a step, some brush of clothing. "I won't stick my nose in again."

"Thank you," Nessa said, muffled - they were probably hugging. "Now let me go to bed."

"Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Elphie."

The door closed. Galinda heard footsteps and panicked briefly that Elphie was coming to her, but another door opened. Galinda put her hand on her chest, slumping against the wall.

Watching the Thropp siblings made Galinda wish she weren't an only child. She found their relationships fascinating, unlike anything she'd experienced. Elphaba and Nessa were back to normal the next day. There was even the return of their usual wry, affectionate banter.

When Galinda looked closer, trying to see the truth of things - if it were really that simple - she didn't find hidden resentment, but the opposite; quiet displays of love. A cup of tea Nessa hadn't asked for. An inquiry into what Elphaba thought about some important issue, the patience to really listen to her. Galinda had never adored Nessa until then, seeing the depth of their sisterhood.

Nessa confirmed, two days before they were to leave, that she would be living in Qhoyre. She gave Elphaba a list of items she would like sent up from Colwen Grounds. Galinda struggled to contain her excitement. Elphie wouldn't be moving away! She was practically vibrating with joy.

Elphaba hugged her the moment they were alone, laughing with sheer relief. "I can't believe that worked," Elphaba breathed.

Galinda grinned up at her. "You're not moving away?"

"Of course I'm not," Elphaba said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Galinda's heart leapt. "I didn't want to assume," she said.

Elphaba studied her, brows furrowed gently in something like confusion. "You know - I mean, without obstructions like caring for Nessa would have been - I do want us to… continue together."

Galinda blinked. "Continue together?"

"Yes."

Galinda wasn't entirely sure what she meant, but it sounded better than not continuing. "I do too."

Elphaba looked frustrated for a moment. "Just as long as you know," she pressed. "As long as you know that I want that. Us."

Galinda thought Elphaba might be awkwardly trying to tell Galinda she wanted them to have a future together. She hoped so, anyway. That was certainly what Galinda wanted. As to what kind of relationship Elphaba wanted, Galinda still didn't know.

Their last day in Qhoyre was surprisingly uneventful. Turtle Heart was getting food from his favourite restaurant for them to all have as a final dinner together. There was too little time to arrange anything otherwise, too much time to feel urgent. They did nothing much at all but share each other's space. There was a value in that Galinda only appreciated belatedly; when would be the next time they were together like this, being so ordinary and relaxed?

At some point, Elphaba had disappeared with Turtle Heart and reappeared looking considerably lighter with a box in her hands. "You're cheerful," Galinda commented with a smile. Elphaba looked up from whatever was in her hands.

"Am I? I suppose I am. Turtle Heart gave me a few things," Elphaba said, restless and therefore excited, Galinda supposed. She came over, sitting close beside Elphaba on the living room couch. Elphaba opened the box and handed her a photo. "Frex and Melena," she said. "Taken by Turtle Heart."

"And you," Galinda said, spotting Elphaba's black head of hair in the grass beyond them.

"And me."

Galinda stared at the photo. There was something brilliant about it. "This is kind of an iconic photo, isn't it?"

"I don't have your eye for art, but I think I know what you mean," Elphaba said, peering at it. "I can't stop looking at it."

"Well, it's a well composed photo. But I think it's also just your parents. They're pretty photogenic and expressive here, and they're young, but it's still a bit dated. Maybe it's their clothes. It creates this timelessness. Old youth."

"I suppose I can see that, yes."

"What do you see in it?" Galinda asked, handing it over.

Elphaba held it carefully. "The smile is unexpected."

Galinda looked from the photo to Elphaba. "The smile?"

"My mother's. I looked at photos at Colwen Grounds, but she wasn't really smiling in any of them." Galinda became unjustifiably tense. She wasn't sure what she was worrying about; Elphaba didn't look upset, and she was the last person to have any sort of sudden emotional outpouring. It was good she was mentioning Melena. "Ah, and the other thing," Elphaba carried on unaware. "He gave me this too. It's a video of Melena playing piano."

"No way."

"Way." Elphaba held the tape between them with a smile. There was a handwritten label: 'Untitled Piano Solos by Melena Thropp.' "He said there was almost twenty minutes of music on here."

Galinda became a bit wary of the items, remembering that Melena had hurt Elphaba in some way. Turtle Heart wouldn't push this on Elphaba, would he? "So Turtle Heart just gave you these?" Galinda asked casually.

"Yes. Well, I asked for them. We were talking about what happened when he was deported and what he brought back with him from Munchkinland. He had letters, glass figures, journals, cards… and amongst all that were these. He let me take them off his hands."

"I see," Galinda murmured, quietly relieved. "Did you want to watch the video?"

Elphaba held it in her hands, staring intensely at nothing in particular. "Not yet," she said. "But eventually…"

Galinda nodded. "Have you talked to him about her?" she asked hesitantly. "About Melena."

"Yes," Elphaba said quickly, already adopting a kind of anxiousness. "I've asked him questions, about what she was like… what music she listened to. I was always curious about that. What her music taste was. He said she liked anything she could dance to." Elphaba smiled, shaking her head softly. "Could have guessed that."

"Sounds like we would get along," Galinda remarked.

"You probably would have, on her better days." Elphaba looked at the photo. "From what Turtle Heart said anyone would. She was a free spirit, as he likes to say."

Galinda watched Elphaba, worrying but not entirely sure why. "She sounds like she was a fun person," she said carefully.

"Perhaps too fun," Elphaba murmured, closing the box in her lap.

Galinda woke to a soft knocking on their door. Elphaba didn't stir, clearly exhausted by last night. They had all been up quite late. It'd been an unexpectedly emotional little meal for Galinda; she had realised, bittersweet, that she would miss the three of them and all of them being together, that it would probably be years till they were gathered again. It felt like everyone had realised it, and so they'd made the effort to talk and joke and laugh together as much as they could manage.

Galinda slipped out of bed and opened the door. "Turtle Heart," she said, voice cracking with sleep. "Good morning."

"Good morning. I'm sorry for my rudeness so early…"

"It's okay," Galinda said with a little smile.

"I was wondering if you would walk with me one last time?"

"I'd love to. Give me a few minutes to…"

"Of course."

Galinda watched Turtle Heart's back thoughtfully as they passed through the tunnel-like trail leading to the peacock pond, as Galinda had dubbed it. She assumed this walk was preceding a conversation. She could feel it. She felt, also, the conversation would be about Elphaba. What else would it be? Who else was there to discuss but Elphaba? She seemed the centre of both their worlds.

They walked in silence until they reached the waterhole. Turtle Heart lead them to the edge of the water. It was beautifully clear. Galinda knelt down, dipping her hand into its cool body. Small fish and tadpoles she hadn't noticed before darted away from her fingers.

"Galinda."

"Yes?" she asked.

He spoke very carefully. "Has Elphaba ever… seemed violent to you?"

Galinda blinked. "No."

"I need you to be honest."

"They haven't. Never, in any way."

"Good. That's good." Turtle Heart rubbed at his mouth, his brows drawn.

"Turtle Heart… why would you ask me that?" She was completely taken aback.

"You're going back to Colwen Grounds, yes? To finish checking through Frex's possessions."

"Yes."

"I do not know what Elphaba will find. I do not know what Frex has kept. But Elphaba may find… there may be things that come up, things that are triggered by what is there."

Galinda looked at him properly. "To do with their mother?"

"Yes." He gazed into the water, the light from it reflecting back onto his face, into his eyes. "There is a still waterhole within Elphaba," he said as if describing a vision. "Years of emotion, memories, thoughts that sit dormant. Life happens and water is poured in, water is taken out, but it's never disturbed or addressed. Until recently. Elphaba is scared of it; scared for it, perhaps."

Galinda didn't know what to say to that. "I'm sorry, I'm not sure I know what you mean."

"Just be aware that Elphaba may be confronted by things they do not want to confront."

Galinda looked into the water with him. Completely still. Like Elphaba. Galinda saw what he saw, maybe.

"I don't think Elphaba would be violent. Um, not to others, at least." Turtle Heart looked at her sharply.

"Why do you say that?"

Galinda shrugged. "Lashing outwardly just doesn't seem very Elphaba. They always blame everything on themselves. It's probably the most frustrating part of their personality." The scariest part of their personality.

She saw the same sentiment in Turtle Heart's reaction, an uncomfortable flicking of the eyes over the treeline. "That is true. Yes, you are quite right." Galinda felt a little victorious; there was something validating about Turtle Heart telling you you're right. "They have always startled me with their maturity since they were a child. The things they say, the way they think. You have noticed, I'm sure, how Elphaba seems to remember their childhood with perfect clarity. Who does that? There is something special about their brain. Decades beyond their age."

"They are brilliant," Galinda said quietly.

"The way they act, too. The responsibilities they put upon themself. Themselves? Ah," Turtle Heart waved his hand. "To carry what they carry at their age is unfair. Young people should be allowed to be young. They were never allowed." Galinda looked at Turtle Heart, who was looking back. "Nobody took care of them. Was nurturing."

Galinda looked away thoughtfully. "Is that what they need from me?"

"I cannot think of another person who could give such a thing to them now," Turtle Heart said unsurely. "But I would not look at it like you say. What Elphaba needs…" Turtle Heart fell silent. He looked at Galinda in the eye, and he was so serious; it made her even more nervous. "When Elphaba returns to Shiz, they will need help. Professional help."

Galinda's blinked. He was right. She was frustrated at herself for not seeing it earlier. "They would never do that, Turtle Heart. You know what they're like."

"Not without support." He paused, and smiled. "And a firm shove in the right direction." Galinda looked away slowly. Turtle Heart saw it. He became apologetic. "Ah, forgive me. I was presumptuous about your feelings on this subject -"

"No, no. I do want to. I want to support them." She hesitated.

"But?" he asked gently.

"But I…" Galinda took a steadying breath. "I don't know if I can. If I'm capable. I'm not very strong, I'm afraid." Galinda glanced up at him with a grimace. "And not half as considerate as you. I hadn't even thought of that. Getting help."

Turtle Heart gave her a kind smile. "You would not be alone, Galinda. I will stay in contact with Elphaba and you. And you both have friends, yes? That young man, Fiyero, and Elphaba's friend Boq, and others."

Galinda looked down. "Yes."

"You don't need all the answers. You are twenty. You are so young, though you may not realise."

Galinda laughed softly. "No, I do. I've never felt younger in my life."

"It's scary, isn't it?" Turtle Heart asked almost conversationally, kneeling at the water beside her. "I was as young when I left here. Travelling alone, without my parents behind me. I did not realise how vulnerable I was until I was."

"Yes," Galinda said quietly, tremulously.

"That is why they must find help. Because you and I, and all your friends, Shell and Nessa. We cannot do this for them. We have our own lives. We don't have all of the knowledge and resources they will need. So all we can do is help them find people who do."

Galinda nodded slowly. They shifted so they were sitting on the rocks, not ready to leave the pond yet. Galinda wouldn't find anything as beautiful as this in Gillikin.

"Thank you, Turtle Heart." Galinda couldn't look at him, already on the edge of tears. "You've been so lovely. You have no idea how…" Her breath stuttered, and she pressed her hands to her face. "You have - you've been very-" She sighed frustratedly as her voice broke. She hated crying in front of people when she didn't know them. It felt ugly, it felt self-absorbed. Turtle Heart's hand rested on her back. It radiated warmth.

"I know you are doing a lot of supporting without a lot of support." Galinda's eyes welled up again, but she kept a firm hold of her composure. "It is okay to be in distress. Even while Elphaba is going through such a thing. To be sad or scared, it is always valid."

"I'm not sad," Galinda mumbled. Turtle Heart remained still. Silent but present. She could not have imagined feeling this comfortable after such a short time knowing someone. But she was not surprised, somehow. Turtle Heart exuded a calm and mature energy that reminded Galinda of her father on his better days. But her father had not comforted her. Even when she was Galinda.

"I'm lonely." She felt her face crumple, and hid herself in her hands.

"Elphaba has become quite detached, hm?"

"I've always been lonely," Galinda sighed nasally, and searched her pockets for tissues. "That's an ongoing issue, I'm afraid. But I am beginning to wonder."

"Wonder?"

"Whether they… If they can, or do, love me." Galinda rolled her eyes at herself. "It's insecurity. It's dumb."

"Wanting to be loved by who we love is completely natural," Turtle Heart said firmly. She did look at him then, and returned his smile shyly. "And I am not surprised you are feeling this way. You did not have to stay and sacrifice what you have, but you did. And that is very kind. You should be proud of yourself."

Galinda shrugged her shoulders. "I just love them. It was natural."

"As long as you take care of yourself."

Galinda scoffed, gave him a look. "You don't need to worry about that. Ask Elphie about me when we first met. I specialise in the self."

Turtle Heart laughed. "I have! We've talked about you." He tilted his head, looking at her thoughtfully. "Perhaps you are right. I hope that is the case."

Galinda glanced away. Turtle Heart was intimidatingly perceptive, and she didn't like the experience of being studied in that way. She hated the idea of people seeing things she did not want them to see. She had spent so much of her life disguising these things, she wasn't really sure what they were. Were they flaws or the truth of who she was? Or both? She felt sometimes she had been raised to believe truth was a flaw.

They walked back to the house slowly.

Their train was at ten. The others woke up one by one. They showered, got dressed, had breakfast together. They talked, putting off packing as long as they could. It had to happen eventually.

They all hugged Turtle Heart and Nessa very tight. Elphaba exchanged long, quiet words with both of them. Galinda did not eavesdrop this time, determined to be better in this way. Elphaba took everyone's bags into the train station early, mumbling that she would get the luggage loaded. Shell was brief but genuine, his departure from Nessa unexpectedly sweet. It was heartwarming to watch, really. Galinda was a bit jealous of their relationships.

And then it was her turn. "Thank you," Galinda said to Turtle Heart.

He nodded with a calm smile. "You will be fine." She felt it must be true if he was saying it.

She faced Nessa. There was a moment of tension where neither knew what to say or what exactly they were by now. Were they friends? They were surely beyond acquaintances. Galinda put the particulars aside and smiled at her, and it was easy and real. "Nessarose."

Nessa smiled back hesitantly. "Galinda." Galinda hugged her again. "Travel safely," Nessa murmured.

"Have a good time here. And contact me anytime, really -"

"I will. Definitely." It was brief, but it was more authentic than either of them could have expected a week before.

They got onto the train, and made their way back to Colwen Grounds.

Before they began going through the last of Frex's possessions, they were to see Shell off. He was happy to go on his own, but Elphaba had insisted on meeting them. "Why?" Shell whined. "It's not like they're druggos. They're nice."

"Don't use that term, Shell." Elphaba explained later it was the Munchkinland equivalent to junkie. "I'm not going to pass off my little brother to complete strangers," Elphaba said firmly. Shell rolled his eyes but didn't argue.

Rejjo's family - the Didsbury's - were not druggos at all. They were the most perfectly average Munchkinland family Galinda had ever seen. They seemed flustered by Elphaba. "You're the big sister, then! Nice to meet you, your Eminence." Elphaba and the father of the family shared a firm handshake.

"Nice to meet you," Elphaba returned. "And you, Mrs Didsbury. And I suppose you are Rejjo?" A young man Shell's age, though rather shorter, nodded his head shyly. Elphaba glanced at Shell. "Why don't you two go off? Doubt you're interested in all this boring business." Shell made a face, but they raced inside fast enough. Elphaba regarded the parents.

"Sorry, your Eminence, Rej isn't too polite..."

"I am not the Eminent Thropp," Elphaba said quickly. They relaxed considerably. "I wanted to meet you since you'll be caring for my brother. And make sure you are content with this arrangement."

"We were the ones that thought of the whole idea," Mrs Didsbury said quickly. "We're happy to have Shell. He's a good kid, and Rej loves him to bits."

"Brother that he never had," Mr. Didsbury put in.

"You're both so young, and, well… we're happy to take him in, Miss Thropp. More than happy to."

Elphaba nodded, clearly relieved. "Very well." She handed them a little scrap piece of paper. "My contact details. Just call me Elphaba, please. And thank you for this." She paused, hesitated. "Take care of him…"

"Of course, Elphaba."

Elphaba went into the house to find him. They hugged, slapping each other's backs.

"You tell me if you ever need anything. Anything at all. And make sure you keep in contact."

"I will," he said. "Thanks, Elphie." She ruffled his hair. Elphaba glanced from Galinda to Shell. "I'll see you outside," Elphaba said to her.

Galinda made a kind of confused, smiling frown. "He's your brother."

"We both know who he'll miss more," Elphaba said with an ambiguous little smile. She fled before Galinda could argue.

Galinda turned to Shell. He was blushing, making some face at Rej before snapping his eyes nervously to hers. He was being teased, Galinda supposed. She almost rolled her eyes. "Do I get a hug?" she asked instead. Shell immediately spread his arms. She gave him the best bear hug she could manage.

"Take care of yourself," she said, half muffled by his shoulder.

"Yeah."

"Don't get into too much trouble."

"No promises," Rej said from behind them, eyes fixed on whatever console game he was shooting people in.

"Shut up." She felt him smile. "No promises, though."

They drew back. "I'm glad I got to meet you, Shell."

"Me too." He was flushed and beaming. "I… you're really cool, so… um, make sure you and Elphie come back, ay?"

Galinda smiled. "Definitely. Maybe you can come up and visit us in your school holidays."

"That'd be alright?" he asked excitedly. Galinda nodded. He looked so keen Galinda couldn't help laughing at him. He became embarrassed, but still happy. "I'm gonna miss you. I'm gonna miss both of you, a lot…" he said it as if just realising.

Galinda softened. She patted his shoulder. "We'll see each other. And you can contact us anytime you like. Don't be stranger, alright?"

"Alright," he mumbled shyly. He pulled her into another hug. "Bye, Galinda."

"See you soon, Shell."

All that was left was to sort through Frex's last possessions. They had already been through most of the house before leaving for Quadling country. The only room they really had to go through - the room Elphaba had avoided, Galinda realised - was Frex and Melena's bedroom.

They entered this room like entering an ancient tomb. Elphaba just stood in the room for a long moment, peering about herself. There was the bed, two cabinets, a vanity. Bookshelves, of course. Two lamps. Wardrobes. A chest at the foot of the bed. This is what Elphaba opened first, since it was right before her. She found it was full of bedding; winter sheets for the turn of the season. This discovery, so ordinary and non-threatening, kicked them into action.

Galinda went through the wardrobes while Elphaba went through the cabinets. "Nicknacks," Elphaba said, dry and amused. "Hundreds and hundreds of nicknacks. Did this man not throw anything away?"

Galinda went through Melena's wardrobe too. She had so many beautiful dresses. If it were not incredibly distasteful, Galinda would be trying them on. She draped them half over her arms to run her hands over the fabric, admired the print and detail.

"Enjoying her collection?" Galinda jerked, dropping them from her arm and looking at Elphaba guiltily.

"Yes…" Elphaba peered at her impassively. She didn't seem angry. Was she angry? "They're beautiful," Galinda said, glancing back at the wardrobe. "She had good taste."

"So I've heard. I haven't looked through them myself - I've barely ever entered this room - but dad always described her as fashionable." She went back to the bookshelves she had been inspecting. "Would they be worth anything?"

"You want to sell them?"

"Well, what else would be done?" Elphaba glanced at her. "Unless you want them."

Galinda pulled a face. "I'm not sure either of use would be comfortable with that."

Elphaba flashed a grin that may or may not have involved any actual amusement. "True enough."

In the middle of the day they had lunch. They were almost finished up. Elphaba intended to leave everything as it was, except for a few photos, and a growing collection of books she'd taken from the study and the bedroom.

Elphaba went back up while Galinda washed their dishes. When Galinda joined her Elphaba was not flicking through books as she expected. She was stood in the middle of the room, staring at something in her hands. "Find something good?" Galinda asked.

"A letter," she said, her voice strange. "From my mother to Frex." Elphaba read it out, which was so unexpected it immediately worried Galinda.

"Dear Frex. I hope the trip is going well. Will you be going through Nest Hardings? If you do you must get me the Kraft canned cheese they don't have up here and some damn pickles - they just don't have the right pickles here…" Elphaba fell silent, her mouth quirking.

"Pickles," Galinda remarked, with relief and attempted humour.

Elphaba was not listening. Her eyes scanned down the page. Her face shifted through a series of emotions Galinda couldn't clearly decipher. "I know you'll want an update on our little rotter," Elphaba continued stiffly. "She's saying big words now. Soon she'll be saying bigger words than I can. She's frightfully smart. She saved Nessie from falling down that ditch again. Sometimes she listens to my stomach like she knows a little person is in there, though I never explained the concept to her. You were -" Elphaba stopped.

After a long moment of silence Galinda stepped toward her carefully. "Elphie?"

Elphaba took a breath. "You were right, we're no good for her. Her skin will be a burden for her. For now it's our burden and we can't take the load. You said you thought she was a curse, but we're the curse. I said I thought she was a monster but I'm the monster, how could a person hate their -" Elphaba's eyes flickered over the paper, her face crumpling. "How could a person hate their -" She read on in silence, her face becoming darker and darker. She folded up the letter, half crushing it in her hands.

Galinda's stomach felt like it was filled with rocks. "Elphie," she said softly, coming forward to touch her hands. Elphaba flinched back from Galinda. She stared blazingly at her, chest heaving. She rushed out of the room.

"Elphie!" Galinda called, hurrying after her.

Elphaba was already out the courtyard door, sprinting toward the southeast corner of the walls. Galinda got in the car and drove off road around to the forest.

Galinda didn't need to search for Elphaba. She could hear the snapping branches and leaves. Galinda followed the sounds into the middle of the forest. She reached the discarded letter before she reached Elphaba. She took it up and read it quickly, not out of curiosity but to understand where exactly Elphaba was.

'How could a person hate their child, even when they're as fucked as me? I'm sure if I told her she would know just how to fix me. Miracle monster.

What the hell is wrong with me, Frex? It's like I'm broken in every possible way I can be. Maybe I broke them. Maybe I'm the curse. Every time I look at her I get so angry and scared. Every time I see that scar. I deserve that scar. I deserve it. I know what I'm doing is wrong. I really think I'm insane, I can't trust myself. I can't take more of your bullshit either, it doesn't help. Evil is clever, I guess.

I don't think I hate her. Hate doesn't make you hate yourself. Maybe it's demons like you say and they hate her or they want her back from me. I wish I could stop all this.

Sorry for that. Be safe. Please come back soon.

- Melena'

Galinda folded the letter, shaken. She needed to find Elphaba.

Elphaba was close and still loud. She wasn't crying. She was on her hands and knees and she was breathing so heavy it was alarming, her whole body shaking. Galinda was going to approach her until something inside Elphaba began to spill over.

It was a terrible sound. It was dry and serrated, coming deep within her chest, a low and steady moan like a dying beast. It got worse as Elphaba curled in on herself, gripping herself as if she were trying to disappear.

Galinda didn't know what to do. She didn't know what to do, and her chest felt like there was a hand in it squeezing her lungs and heart. "Elphie…!" she cried, strangled and made quiet.

Elphaba may have heard Galinda; she choked, and began to sob. She fell onto her side and curled into a tight ball, leaves and dirt clinging to her arms. Galinda steadied herself against a tree.

She couldn't move. She was so overwhelmed by Elphaba that she felt bolted to the spot. Galinda had not known how terribly painful it would be to see Elphaba in pain. Elphaba had never shown it to her. She felt a bit like dropping to the ground and weeping herself, but it wouldn't help, and so she found herself frozen, torn between concern and anxiety.

"It hurts," Elphaba sobbed, grinding the words out of her body. Her hands clawed at her stomach. "It hurts, and I can n-never, I can never tell them -" Elphaba turned her face to the ground, becoming louder. "I can never touch them, I can n-never feel, I'll never get it," Elphaba cried helplessly, "I'll never know if they loved me."

Galinda inhaled sharply, and dried her face on her sleeve, rushing over to Elphaba. She dragged Elphaba half into her arms with some effort, patting her bubbling, bloody cheeks dry. They were not as bad as Galinda had thought they'd be. Elphaba clung to her and cried all the harder. Her crying was more breathing, more shuddering than heavy tears, as if her body knew the water was bad for her and made an effort to keep tears back.

Galinda kissed Elphaba's head, stroked her hair. "Oh Elphie," she whispered. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. " Galinda hated this. She didn't know what to do. All she could manage was to hold Elphaba tightly, her hands shaking. "I'm sorry."

The tears soon stopped. Elphaba lay with her head in Galinda's lap and didn't move for a long time. Galinda ran her hands through Elphaba's hair, hoped it was soothing and helped somehow.

Elphaba eventually turned her face up to look at Galinda. Her cheeks were awful, her whites and eyelids bloody red. She closed her eyes, sighed exhaustedly. "You know that scar on my hip."

"Yes," Galinda said, and she knew what was coming.

"I got that when Melena tried to carry me into Illswater Lake." She nestled her face into Galinda's legs, her eyebrows drawing together. "She didn't… throw me in, or try to. She held me and walked into the lake. She got to her waist, and I was draped in her arms, so my hip went in first when I- when I was moving about. And then Frex and Turtle Heart rushed down. She was gone for months after that."

"Gone…?"

"She was admitted into a hospital by her relatives. She'd let it slip to one of her brothers, I think, and he'd told her grandfather. And she went away. Dad was furious. And I remember when she came back, she hugged me. Really hugged me. And she whispered to me. She'd never talked right to me before, always about me to other people.

"She whispered that she was sorry." Elphaba pressed her hands to her eyes, her mouth twisting. "She said she was sorry, and that she'd been bad. But she would do better."

Galinda struggled to not descend into tears herself. She needed to stay level. She'd never felt someone else's pain so viscerally, though.

"And I thought… or I hoped, after that, that she genuinely cared…" Elphaba's breathing became ragged again. "But she didn't. She still - she still ha- hate-" she pressed her face into Galinda's stomach.

Galinda felt completely useless. She was absolutely out of her depth, witnessing the reopening of such brutal wounds. All her usual condolences, the kind she would give Pfannee after another break up, were all so terribly trite in the face of this. But condolence was not what Elphaba needed.

All Galinda had was a desperate love for Elphaba. It was something she didn't yet understand. It filled her with a strange power, a power within herself that existed entirely for Elphaba. She had drawn on it again and again during this trip. She had bent herself in ways she had not thought she could, and been made a better person. She drew on it naturally, so even out of her depth, even feeling overwhelmed, Galinda was possessed with an intense protectiveness.

She curled her arms around Elphaba, pulling her further into her arms. She kissed Elphaba's forehead, laid her cheek there. "I'm not going anywhere," Galinda said quietly, because she couldn't. Elphaba shuddered in her arms. "I'm right here."

She murmured reassurances to Elphaba for what might have been hours. When they finally got up it was dusk, and their legs were awfully stiff. Galinda held Elphaba's hand between hers. "Come on. Let's get those burns patched up."

"Mm."

They sat in Elphaba's bedroom. Galinda took over the process automatically, patting Elphaba's face delicately, wiping away the blood and the strange, flaking skin at the surface of the burns. Now clean, she doused a towelette in medicinal oil, pressed it gently into Elphaba's skin. She twitched but remained still, her eyes closed, her breathing deep and steady. Galinda covered her cheeks in wide bandaids with antiseptic. "Not sure what to do about the burns on your eyelids…"

"They always heal pretty fast," Elphaba said.

"That's good." Galinda fiddled with the edge of her sock. She wanted to touch Elphaba's cheeks but… no. So many reasons, no. "How are you?" Galinda asked.

"Better," Elphaba murmured, her voice rough. Her face fell, eyes on her folded legs. "Sorry about…"

"Don't apologise. There's absolutely nothing to apologise for."

"Is that so?" Had Elphaba ever sounded so vulnerable?

"Yes. You're… letting me love you." Elphaba peered up at her. "Please let me, Elphie," Galinda whispered.

It felt very loud in that big, silent house. Elphaba's hands rested on Galinda's thighs. Then - Galinda almost moved back out of surprise - she kissed Galinda. It was light, brief. But she kissed Galinda again, and again, lingering longer each time. Her legs shifted against Galinda's, the mattress dipped and brought them closer, and Elphaba kissed her, slow and cautious.

They parted. Galinda stared at her unsurely. "Elphie? Is this…?"

"Please," Elphaba said, quiet and on the edge of breaking.

Galinda nodded very slightly. She pressed her lips to Elphaba's cheek and to her neck. She was drawn up to her mouth. "Anything," she mumbled against Elphaba's lips. Anything you need. I'm for you.