Chapter 26
I watch as Edward laves each nipple with copious amounts of attention. It's a detached observation, almost as if it's not me he's currently attending. My mind has locked my thoughts down and refused to allow it the freedom to run free with the actual thought process it wants; that Edward Cullen is in my house and in my room with my nipple in his mouth!
My body takes a second to tap on my brain and remind it that while it's all caught up in this dumb ass internal monologue and debate, Edward Cullen is lavishing attention and my body would like to respond in kind to this said attention.
A small sigh slips from my lips as his brush across the skin between my breasts.
"I told you to stop thinking about this and just go with it."
I smirk because he is dead on with his comment.
"I'm trying. I'm sorry. It's not you, It's me, I swear."
He chuckles and I feel the warmth of his breath as it skims across my stomach.
"Well, that's the first time I've heard that line," he murmurs.
I pull his head away from my skin as I speak to him. First of all because I can't concentrate with his lips on my skin, secondly because I need him to know that I mean this.
"Edward, I've spent a lot of time - more time that I care to admit to you – thinking about you, your every move, your thoughts. I wanted a way to get to know the real you hidden underneath the public persona that everyone else sees. I've wanted to know the person that Emmett McCarty knows, the one who has been his best friend for more years than I know." His eyes drop away from mine and I'm not sure if I've lost him with my rambling. "But now that you're here, all I can think of is that you deserve someone better, more glamorous and better equipped to be your partner in all ways and I'm not sure that's me. I'm just plain old Bella."
As much as I'd like to believe that all the old teenage insecurities are gone because I'm an adult, I can't fool myself. They are still there. Especially when I'm face to face with someone as beautiful as Edward Cullen.