Boilerplate Disclaimer: The various characters from the Kim Possible series are all owned by Disney. Any and all registered trade names property of their respective owners. Cheap shots at celebrities constitute fair usage.

Kim: Avoid Any Action with an Unacceptable Outcome

I consider myself normal. I'm your basic average girl. I get good grades 'cause I work hard, but still feel dumb because I'm the only one in my family who isn't super brilliant. I know I'm great at fighting. But once again it doesn't come easy. Maybe Shego's right. Maybe I am an over-achiever, but...

But I'm way off the subject. The subject is normal. I am normal. And normal girls don't have feelings for other girls...

Maybe I need to define feelings. Yes, we can have feelings for other girls. I love my friends. But I don't love them in that way. I'm normal.

I'm not a bit like Alex. She's this girl in my class who dressed more like a guy and she... Well, that's not normal. But I'm a cheerleader. I dress like a girl most of the time. I like pretty things. I'm normal.

While I'll admit I sometimes have erotic dreams about women I have them about guys too... sometimes. I mean, we can't stop our dreams, can we? And it doesn't mean we want it to happen, right? If I watch a horror movie and dream about a zombie eating my brain it doesn't mean I want a zombie to eat my brain. Right? I'm normal.

I can prove an erotic dream about another woman doesn't mean anything, I've even had one or two about Bonnie Rockwaller – and I know darn well I've got no interest in her. And, like I said, I have them about guys too. I've never really considered what the ratio is, in terms of dreams about girls and dreams about guys that is. I've probably had more dreams about girls, but considering how often we shower together after gym and cheerleading practice that's just normal, right?

At least I think it's normal. I don't actually talk with anyone about it when I have dreams like that...

But that's because normal girls don't talk about erotic dreams with other girls. I know that because none of the other cheerleaders do. They only talk about guys. So I only talk about guys. Because I'm normal. And remember, I have dreams about guys too... sometimes. And I don't have them about girls all the time.

But lately I've had a couple... Well, a few... I didn't really count them. Maybe it was several, with Shego in them.

I had one or two early in the summer that had Shego in them, but that's like the one or two I've had with Bonnie, they didn't mean a thing. That first night we sat in the park until one and ate ice cream? Had one that night for sure. Probably from staying up too late talking with her. It didn't mean a thing. I'm normal.

But I've been having way too many dreams like that about Shego the last month or two. And I'm looking forward to seeing her at the martial arts classes. When she called me for the concert my heart was working overtime, and flying back after the concert, singing I Love Rock 'n Roll with her. I was so happy I wanted to kiss her. But that would have been wrong. I'm normal.

While I would have had fun with Mom at freshman orientation it was a treat to be there with Shego and hear her whisper her snarky comments in my ear. And Mom wouldn't have bought me a beer. I didn't really like the beer, but it was Shego treating me like an adult. I wonder if I'll ever be an adult to my parents or if I'll always be their little Kimmie?

The beer made me a little light headed. I didn't enjoy that either. Why do people drink? Do they enjoy that feeling? I was afraid I'd lost some coordination and leaned against Shego for support. She seemed fine, even though she's had more to drink than I had. I liked her arm around me, it made me feel safe.

And feeling safe around Shego is definitely not normal.

And something is definitely wrong with her. At our next martial arts class I knocked her down with a move she could have... should have blocked easily. I was afraid I'd really hurt her. I started to panic, I was that worried.

All of this is wrong on so many levels. First, I am not interested in girls. I am normal. Second, even if I was interested in girls there is no way I could be interested in Shego – we have way too much bad history behind us. And third, even if I had an interest in Shego she has no interest in me. When she bought that beer for me? I thought she was treating me like an adult, kind of a welcoming me to adulthood or something. Instead it was a test. She was treating me like a child, and scolded me the next day for failing the test.

So, it was very clear to me that I had no feelings for Shego, could not possibly develop feelings for Shego, and that she had no interest in me. But no matter how often I repeat those perfectly rational arguments they don't seem to be working, I can't stop thinking about her. Well, maybe the perfectly rational arguments are working in a way. Whenever I remind myself of them they leave me feeling more depressed and upset. They are supposed to make me feel good about not being interested in Shego, but they make me feel worse.

I need to get my head on straight before I head for college, and I can't do that in Middleton. I keep running into Shego. There is way too much temptation to pick up the phone and call her. I need to get out of town, spend a little time alone figuring out life, the universe and everything.

"Can I borrow the camping equipment?" I asked at dinner.

"What for?" Dad responded.

"I want to go off for a week or so before college starts."

"Alone?" Mom asked.

"Of course alone, who would I go with?"

"Just asking," she replied. "Are you all right?"

I almost gave her a lie and said, "I'm fine." I didn't. "Feeling kind of down... I don't know why."

"Probably just nerves about starting college," Dad told me cheerfully. "You'll do fine."

"Is that all it is?" my Mom asked me in a voice that suggested she didn't think pre-college jitters was all it was.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I just feel... I want to be alone." I got the sense Mom didn't want me going, but Dad came to my defense. I was an adult now, he insisted and could decide what was best for me.

After dinner I called Wade. I wasn't sure how good my resolve was. If I drove or stayed close to Middleton I might be tempted to cheat and come back. I needed to get as far away from Middleton as I could get, to some place so remote it would be hard for me to get home without calling for a ride back.

He knew a pilot up in Alaska who flew over wilderness areas and set up a ride to Alaska, and then a ride to the great nowhere for me.

The pilot's name was Sam. I was grateful he'd never heard of me, but it meant he was a little reluctant to drop me off in the middle of nowhere, didn't think I had the necessary skills. He called Wade for reassurance I wouldn't die of exposure or something.

The plane was equipped for a water landing and he offered to set me down, but I told him, "Don't bother."

I suspect Wade was paying him to drop me off, and would pay him to pick me up when I called for a ride out, but I didn't care. I just wanted to be alone. Sam assured me this was the most isolated spot in the park, virtually inaccessible except by air. He circled the small lake once, "For luck," he called it, and I jumped.

Since my gear can't control its descent it drifted a little from the spot I'd picked to land. I bundled my 'chute into a ball after I got out of harness and went to find it.

The pack was heavy, but I noticed a little stream while I searched for my equipment and I decided to set up there instead of dragging it all the way down to the lake shore. I zipped open the pack and dumped everything out when a familiar voice demanded, "What the Hell are you doing here?"

I screamed. Literally. When you're sure you're all alone and you get a verbal tap on the shoulder it's scary. I whipped around to face her. It took me a minute to catch my breath after the shock.

"I asked what you're doing here?" she demanded again. She did not look happy to see me.

"I... I came up here to be alone," I stammered. "Why are you here?"

"I came up here to be alone."

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you come up here to be alone?"

"I... Why did you?"

I didn't have a good answer. "I asked you first."

"I needed time away from Drakken. You?"

Well, I couldn't use needing to get away from Drakken as an excuse. And I sure wasn't going to tell her the real reason. "Uh... No reason, just wanted to be alone."

"No reason? You come to the God-damned middle of nowhere for no reason?" she demanded in an angry tone. She turned and went hiking off into the brush.

I stood there for a couple seconds, not believing what was happening. I was happy and terrified to see her at the same time. Then I went after her. I caught up with her down by the lake. She was sitting on a log, looking out across the water. I sat down on a rock.

I don't know how long our period of silence lasted. I said nothing, afraid to speak. Maybe she was afraid too.

"Why are you here," I asked softly. "You didn't need to come to the middle-of-nowhere to get away from Drakken."

"I wanted time alone. To think. You really didn't follow me?"

"No... I really wanted time alone to think too." We both stared out over the lake for a couple minutes. "As long as we're both here we could–"

"What part of alone don't you get?"

That made me mad. "I didn't follow you! I have as much right to be here as you do!"

I think my anger surprised her. She was quiet for a minute. "Sorry. This is crazy, isn't it, the way we keep running into each other?"

"Yeah."

"Well... I've got camp set up, but I've got a hovercraft and you can't get out. I'll pack up my shit and clear out. I'll give you this place."

"You don't have to go," I said timidly. I was trying to face my fears about how I felt about her. Maybe it would be more honest to be around her than to run off like I had. I'm the over-achiever, I go after what I want, and the way my heart was beating I wanted her to stay I needed to know how she felt.

"Better if I go."

We sat, silent, for awhile longer. She might have been fighting with herself about staying. I lost. "I'd better go now," she said and stood up.

I walked back to her campsite with her. It looked like a bear had gone through it. That was because a bear had. We found the footprints. It was a big bear.

Shego ran over and threw back the camouflage cover on Drakken's hovercraft. It hadn't been touched. "Shit, I should have sprayed the tent with capsaicin oil too."

"I haven't sprayed my food," I exclaimed and took off running.

"Stop," Shego shouted. "Do you have pepper spray?"

"Yeah, but I didn't spray it before you startled me."

"Wait for me."

The grizzly had done a pretty good job of going through my stuff. My tent, sleeping bag, fishing rod, and six tin cans of food were fine. Looked like some clothes had claw marks as Mister Grizzly went through looking for food. My food, other than the six cans, was either fattening a bear up for hibernation or in no shape to eat. And I don't know why he had to rip up the two books I'd brought to read. And I'd definitely wash out my pots and skillets before cooking in them, or I would if I had food left to cook in them.

"Got your kimmunicator?" Shego asked.

"Yeah."

"Call Wade, have him get your pilot back to take you home."

"What are you going to do?"

"Stay here."

"Stay here? With a bear around?"

She shrugged. I'll use the pepper spray to mark my territory."

"You don't have a tent."

"I can use the canvas from the tent to rig a lean-to."

"Well, I'm staying too," I announced. "It's not safe for you to be alone with a bear so close."

"I'll be fine," she insisted. "And, if you haven't noticed, you don't have much left in the way of food."

"I have my fishing rod," I pointed out. "I'll get by."

She put her hand on her forehead and slowly ran it down over her face in a gesture of exasperation. "I came up here to be alone."

"So did I!"

"Well we can't very well be alone together."

"Why not?"

That left her speechless. I didn't know what thoughts were going through her head, she looked kind of in shock, and unhappy, and thinking about it, and wanting to agree with me all at once.

I took a deep breath and said something fast before I had enough time to think about it – and talk myself out of letting the words out of my lips. "I'll share my tent with you if you share some food with me."

That stunned her. "Share... your... tent?"

In for a penny, in for a pound, "What, you want to share the sleeping bag too?"

That startled her. "Kim... Look... I really did come here to be alone. I wanted... I need time to think, alone."

"Think about what?"

"My life. What I... None of your damn business. Call Wade and have him get you out of here."

"No. You leave if you want. I'm staying." My stomach was tying itself in knots as I said that. What would I do if she did leave?

"God damn it, Princess, you have to be the most pig-headed woman on this planet."

"As bad as the one you see when you look in the mirror?"

We started to gather up the remains of my camping gear to move to her campsite. "Just stay out of my way," she warned.

I was mostly silent as we set up my tent. I used up most of my pepper spray letting the bears know what our space was. It was pretty strong stuff, but we both felt safer afterward.

Safer from the bear. I don't know what Shego was thinking, but I was still scared about my decision to stay here with her.

She caught a couple nice fish in the late afternoon. I cleaned them down by the lake, no point in having the smell of fish guts too close to our camp.

Fish, a couple granola bars, and spring water for supper. I washed the plates and skillet and we killed a little time with small talk. As the setting sun touched the horizon I yawned. "I'm turning in. You coming, dear?"

I wondered if I looked as nervous as she did? I sure felt that nervous.

I spread the sleeping bag open and we lay on top, with a couple blankets over us. Shego was off to the edge, lying stiffly on her back and staring up at the tent above us – not looking at me at all.

All afternoon I'd been hoping she'd make some kind of move to make things easier for me. But this is Shego. She has no experience making things easier for me. She's an underachiever, and probably afraid of making the first move. Well, as an overachiever it looked like it was going to be up to me.

I rolled over and put an arm across her, leaning my head on her shoulder. She remained stiff. There was this awful moment of silence. Did we really think alike? Was she thinking what I was thinking? My head was resting against her, and I could hear her heart going a million miles an hour... Or maybe was my heart beating like that. I don't ever remember feeling as scared as I felt that second. If she was thinking what I was thinking why didn't she say something?

Finally, I licked my lips nervously and tried to assume a casual voice, "You've, uh, kissed a lot of girls?"

"Not a lot."

"Some?"

"Yeah..."

"Liked it?"

"Yeah..."

I really wanted more of an answer than that. I still had a thousand questions in my head. After another couple seconds of silence I confessed, "I never have."

"Never have?"

"Kissed a girl."

"Oh... Want to try?"

"I was just... curious that's all."

"So... You don't want to try?"

"I didn't... I don't... Yeah."

"Well, if you want to try, I'm the only woman around."

My stomach was trying its best to kill me. This was scarier than any death trap I'd ever been in. "I..."

"I don't kiss and tell," she told me.

I turned my face toward hers and snuggled closer. She leaned toward me and our lips met... Her lips were soft, gentle... Gentle... A word I'd never associated with Shego. I'm not sure how long the kiss lasted, but not long enough for sure.

"Well?" Shego demanded.

"Well what?"

"Did you like it?"

My face felt hot. I must have been blushing. "Yes," I admitted.

"Kissing you was nice."

"Nice, just nice?" I protested

"Okay, it was nice plus. I–"

I hit her in the mouth, with my lips. I attacked her tongue with my own. That wasn't long enough either. All the time in the world would not have been long enough, but a girl has to breathe.

"Just nice?" I taunted at the end of the kiss.

"Wow. But you kiss like you don't have a lot of experience with serious kissing."

"That wasn't a serious kiss?"

"That was an assault on my tongue."

"Okay," I confessed, "not as much experience as I'd like."

"Fortunately," she boasted, "I'm an excellent teacher."

She got up on one elbow. I couldn't see her well in the gloom as she slowly leaned down and our lips met again. It was like nothing, nothing I'd ever experienced before. Her lips were warm and tender, gentle and timid, and assertive without being dominating all at once. Without saying a word her lips were inviting me to experience feelings I've never known. I lost all track of time. Nothing existed but Shego and me, together. When her lips made their way down to my throat I was panting and weak in the knees. I don't think I could have stood if I had to.

Suddenly I pushed her away.

"What?" she demanded in a startled voice.

"I don't want to be just a roll in the hay... That was what you said you wanted with Monique, isn't it? Just a roll in the hay."

She laid back down. "Be easier if it were," she said in a soft voice.

"I don't understand."

"You... Me... Kim, I want so much more than... I... Look, there's no way this makes any sense. Doesn't that scare you?"

"Yeah, but I'm not going to let it stop me. Not if you want this the way I do."

"No way this can work."

"Anything's possible for a Possible."

"No way!"

"Hopeless pessimist!"

"Incurable optimist! You really think this can work?"

I nodded yes.

She smiled and pulled me on top of her, her arms went around me, holding me. "God, I wish..." We kind of ran out of words for awhile. We were probably kissing for a half hour or so

"We both know this isn't going to end with a kissing lesson, don't we?" I told her.

"It will tonight," she told me.'

"I don't think so," I replied and slid my hand–

"Stop it," she told me. I stopped, but I left my hand in place. "Kim, I don't... Our first time should... My guess is this will be your first time. Am I right?"

"You're right," I reluctantly admitted.

"Well, your first time should not be fumbling around in a little tent that reeks of pepper spray. It deserves clean white sheets on a queen-sized bed, with a bathroom with hot running water and a shower for afterwards."

"None of which we have," I pointed out, and let my hand drift. "We're stuck in the middle of nowhere."

She gently but firmly took hold of my wrist and pulled my hand out from her clothes. "We're not stuck. You could call for a ride, if you had to. But I have the hovercar. Tomorrow morning we clear out of this hell hole and find a three or four star hotel or a cute little bed and breakfast and... I told Drakken I'd be gone for at least a week."

"That was my plan."

"Well then, we find our nice place with the clean sheets, flush toilet, and hot shower and we spend the rest of tomorrow in bed. So let's get some sleep now and conserve our strength."

"Where will we go? I think a place called Fort Yukon was the closest thing on the map."

"Yeah, and has like six hundred people."

"So, less chance of being recognized?"

"Like, more chance of sticking out like a sore thumb and being remembered. Anchorage or Juneau. Larger cities have more options for places to stay."

"And more people who might recognize us."

"Who's expecting Kim Possible and Shego to get a room together? We'll be hiding in plain sight."

She pulled me close and spooned me. I snuggled back, marveling at how good it felt to have her arms around me. "Sounds stupid," I said.

"That's what I told Drakken when he sprang it on me."

I yawned and murmured, "Don't know why Wade said we think alike."

"That's what I was thinking."

I know she likes to have the last word. Come to think of it, so do I. But I let her have it, tonight.

-The End-