ok this is kind of on the shorter side. i'm sorry for that.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own Ouran, and probably never will. The plot is mine, as well as any OC's that I may use in the future. Use my plot without permission, and I predict that ninjas will attack you soon.

"...and that's what happened."

"Cool story bro, tell it again. And make me a sandwich?"

"...this is practically the WORST time to try and bring out your American jokes, Hika... plus, you used that last part wrong."

"Sorry. Anyways... you needa go fix this. Now. KAYTHANKSBYE."

"HIKARU!"

...and that is how Kaoru found himself standing outside Haruhi's apartment, pacing nervously in front of the doorway, but really not doing much of anything at all.

...he stayed until late at night, when the stars came up and the moon mocked him, grinning sideways in the night sky like the Cheshire Cat.

...then he went home.

"Haruhi? Why is one of those twins walking in front of the doorway?"

"I dunno, dad... just leave him there."

Kaoru showed up at school the next day with dark circles under his eyes. His twin was clueless to the reason why, and the fangirls flitted about, speaking their concerns about his health.

"Kaoru, shouldn't you take a rest? You look so tired, and I don't know why!"

"Oh, Hikaru, it's ok, as long as I have you, everything is better!"

The fangirls swooned, but both the twins knew what had really happened.

"Haruhi, what's wrong?" Hunny asked, he'd noticed Haruhi acting more scatterbrained than her usual composed self.

"Oh? Um, nothing, senpai. Nothing at all." she returned her gaze to the twincesting twins, as per usual. Girls still swooned left and right for the act, as though their forbidden love was better than Twilight's.

"You're not," Mori stated. He fixed Haruhi in his gaze. "We both know something's up. And I'm here for you, if you need someone who'll listen."

"Se—Takashi... I mean no offense, but I think that you may not be the right person for this," Haruhi replied, her fair skin turning the most subtle shade of pink.

He nodded once, and turned his attention to a rather interesting point on the ceiling. Hunny sighed. He realized that he had to do something, fast. If his cousin didn't get to Haruhi first, Kyoya or Kaoru certainly would. It certainly didn't help that Ranka already had a certain love for Kyoya and that karou was around so often that he was almost part of the family himself.

"Hunny? This is an interesting surprise. What brings you here today?" Ranka asked as he got out the things for tea.

"It's about Haruhi. I need to know something, on Takashi's behalf."

Ranka raised a perfectly groomed eyebrow. "What about him?"

"Who, out of the club, would you want most as Haruhi's husband?"

Ranka's eyes widened and he nearly spat out his tea. "HUSBAND?"

"Yes, husband. We are talking about the 'elite lifestyle,' people do not usually date around."

"Honestly, Hunny... I don't know. Before, I would have said Kyoya—"

"I knew it..." Hunny muttered.

"—but now I think that maybe Mori would be the better choice. And I'm not just saying that because you're here," Ranka added, seeing Hunny's disbelieving expression, "I've seen the ways that they react around her. Kaoru is too childish even though he can be very mature at times. Hikaru is double that, because of his... difficult temper. You're in a relationship, and don't EVEN get me started in that blonde fop."

Nobody ever told Ranka that Tamaki was gay...

"Kyoya... he's rich, handsome, intelligent... all very good qualities. But for some reason he seems to care more about winning and growth than Haruhi's actual feelings. Like he has some ulterior motives."

Hunny nodded, and motioned for Ranka to continue.

"I've seen Mori... whenIstalkyouguyssometimes," Ranks hurriedly mumbled the last part. "But I can see how he's always watching over her to protect her, yet he's also willing to step back if she loves someone else."

A sudden knock on the door startled them both. Ranka rose to open it...