Pixie Tip: A group of pixies is still called a group. A group of geese may be a gaggle and cows may be herds, but pixies aren't like, pixie-tribes. They are just like any group of people together. So don't offend them by asking if they are a pride or something. They have sharp teeth like a lion to prove you wrong.
I woke up the next morning surprised to find Astley still asleep in the same position he passed out in. He had been a perfect gentleman the night before. I mean, I shouldn't have really been surprised because he wasn't a touchy feely guy. But just the fact that he was sleeping in the same bed as me had me wondering if he'd attempt to at least cuddle. I laughed at the thought of a guy actually wanting to only cuddle, and got up.
There was a lot of work to be done with now 2 days until we made our way to Valhalla. That thought alone caused not only just butterflies in my stomach, but a tidal wave of other emotions at the same time. Would we get there safely? Could I find Nick? Would he still want me? These questions all amounted to a lot of I don't knows and lots of hope. But overall, I was ready and anxious to just get there and find out once and for all what was going on.
Not wanting to be the only one awake, I grabbed the pillow off the bed and whacked it at Astley's sleeping form. He shot up immediately looking around in concern and then relaxed when he saw what the cause was. I couldn't help but to laugh at his reaction.
"Well that's a nice good morning," he mumbled groggily.
"We have a lot of work to do. You can't be sleeping the day away. We have training and such, remember?" I told him as I grabbed a ponytail off the table and put my hair up.
"Training?" he asked, sounding confused.
"If you haven't noticed, I don't fight very well and when we get to Valhalla, there may be guards and what not that we will have to battle or something. So I need to be prepared. Teach me some fighting moves and such."
"Yeah, your moves are lacking a certain pixie quality, but that's what happens when a Were teaches you some moves," he said raising his brows. "I guess it's smart to teach you if it means keeping you alive."
"Being alive helps," I added, ignoring his comment about Nick's training.
After that the morning progressed in a slow kind of flurry; quick breakfast of toast, getting dressed in what I thought was appropriate training gear—aka my running stuff—and lastly, sending a text to my mom to let her know what I'd be up to.
"Where'd did those come from!" I blurted out as Astley came out of the bedroom later with two rather large swords in his hand.
"They were in my traveling case. Don't want to travel without a weapon," he said with a wink. "I'll train you on this, but I think what we should go over first is how to use your pixie power as well."
"I think we should do the whole sword thing first because that sounds easier." And less personal I thought to myself. While I had seen myself in the mirror and accepted that side of me to a certain extent, I really didn't want to delve into that part just yet. I'd rather have an actual weapon.
"If you think so," he said as he grabbed a duffle bag and placed the swords in it. We couldn't really go walking around with swords in our hands after all. We had decided that the woods would probably be the best place to practice so that we wouldn't be run into.
"I'm bringing two of my closest fighters for protection and practice, then," Astley said suddenly as we were leaving the room.
"You'll be fine enough, or are you a bad fighter?" I asked jokingly.
"Better safe than sorry."
I don't know if I hit a chord on that one, but I found myself following him to a room 2 doors down. He knocked twice before someone answered.
A rather large pixie around Astley's age appeared at the door looking disheveled. I forgot to even look at what time it was. For all I knew it was the butt-crack of dawn. Whoops.
"Everything alright?" he asked hastily as he realized who was at the door. Then seeing me, he clumsily bowed and came back up. This made me blush and feel very uncomfortable.
"Sorry to bother you, Kamen but I was wondering if you were up to some training today," Astley asked casually. "But if you're not up for it, that's fine."
"Not a problem. I love sparring with you, makes me feel more important" he said with a true smile. I couldn't be sure, but I had a feeling these guys were probably good friends before Astley had to take over. For starters, he didn't look uncomfortable with him and definitely didn't talk to him like he was scared. Me, however, he was still unsure of I noticed as he kept giving furtive glances my way.
"I'm Zara and I really appreciate the help. I suck at the whole fighting thing," I offered with a smile. I felt the need to break the ice or something. After all, Astley was the only one I really knew of this tribe (was it a tribe or a pack? I didn't know what to call a whole group of pixies…)
"Oh, I know who you are," he said with a small grin. "And I'm sure you'll be good…with practice…Just give me 5 minutes and I'll be ready to go."
"Thanks, Kam. I really appreciate. I've learned some new moves so be ready," Astley said with a laugh.
"I'm ready for anything."
"Well, be ready for Dalia too, because we're going all out today," Astley added. I didn't know if that was a person or a weapon, but I noticed Kamen's face turn scarlet.
"Umm…she's…she's inside. I'll wake her and let her know," he said sheepishly as he backed away and shut the door.
I couldn't help but laugh at that point.
"A girl warrior! And she's with big ole muscles himself!" I turned to Astley to see his reaction, and he shrugged his shoulders.
"I'm happy for him. And funny you mention his bulk…his name actually means boulder. But he and Dalia are the best fighters I know. I've trained with them since I was little. They'll help out a lot…they may even be helpful in Valhalla.
That made my smile drop. I didn't want anyone going with us at all if need be. It was bad enough Devyn wanted to throw himself into it, but I didn't want anyone getting harmed on my quest to get to Nick. This was my fight. I'd even keep Astley behind if I could.
"I don't want anyone else going, Astley. I mean it. The less people involved the better." I wasn't going to back down on this idea either. I was putting my foot down and I wasn't going to budge. I put my amnesty face on and stared at him hard.
"As you wish," he murmured as he leaned against the wall. That was easier than I thought. I didn't know whether to be relieved or worried. I decided relieved for the moment. But if he tried anything later, I'd have to bust out some pixie move that I hopefully master soon.
Minutes later, as promised, Kamen was out in the hall followed by a pretty looking blonde girl who looked pretty able bodied herself. When Astley said they had trained, he wasn't lying. I was about to introduce myself when she bowed low and gave Astley a smile.
"No bowing, please. I'm Zara, just Zara. You don't have to do that," I said holding back the frustration in my voice.
"Well in public proceedings then," she said gently, but she smiled and relaxed in response. "But you're not just Zara, you are a queen." I would never get used to that fact—and I hoped to never have to.
"Thanks for coming Dalia," Astley said. "Shall we?"
Hours later I was sweating like a pig and was on my back for the millionth time. I'd expected the training to be hard, but it was absolutely grueling. If Astley was hoping to dissuade me from going on this crazy mission, he was doing a good job of it. I worked muscles I never even knew I had. I seemed to provide some good entertainment for Kam and Lia, as they liked to be called. At first they didn't laugh out of respect, but I waved that idea off and we quickly became somewhat like friends.
"At least you don't quit," Kam said as he gave me a hand up. "That'll get you far."
"She can always crawl or run the fastest the other way. You do have speed on your side. If only you could focus it on moving the sword,"Lia added.
"I'll keep that in mind," I groaned as I got up.
"It would probably help if you embraced your pixie side," Astley commented as I took a moment to catch my breath. "You know, glamour down and allowing some instinct to kick in. There's nothing to be scared of."
That last comment threw me off guard. Was it a fear? Was it something I was scared to do?
Anthropophobia fear of people.
Prosophobia fear of progress
Eremiphobia fear of being oneself.
Am I to be defined now by being a pixie, a queen one at that? The more I thought about it the more I realized that what I was afraid of was what others would make of me: specifically Nick. Would they see the Zara I always was and would be, or would embracing my pixieness cause me to lose myself?
"Zara?"
Apparently my thought process was going on for too long because he was looking at me all weird. "I'm not scared," I finally told him. "I just don't feel the need to let it take over. I remember the one time I did that I was clawing at my father."
"That's because you had all that built up rage and loss, not to mention you weren't use to yourself yet. You are strong, Zara. Embracing your powers can help you, not hinder you. Just as your power of touch, you have the ability to control it, but it has to be practiced," he said, rubbing my arm.
"Alright, enough talk. Let's spar," Lia said as she hopped around eager for a fight. "But I do think you should let loose. It's easy." And with that she dropped her glamour and nodded to Kam to do the same, who obliged within seconds.
"Well I mean you don't really have to drop glamour to embrace your powers, but it's one less thing to focus on. If looking like this is the only thing holding you back, then don't do it," Lia continued.
I never thought of it that way. I guess looks kind of did have a part in my indecision to. I know, typical girl thing to do, but I couldn't help it. I smiled at her in appreciation. I'd have to thank Astley later for bringing another girl around.
"Just feel the earth beneath your feet, the wind in your hair, the trembling of nature and it's all in your grasp. Let the energy course through your body and use it as a force," Kam said as he threw down his sword and stretched his muscles. I so wasn't going to fight him, but his words sounded pretty peaceful.
Before I knew it, he and Lia were a blur of movement with limbs flying right and left. It made me wince to see her go up against such a large man, but she seemed more than capable. He would jab with a right hook and she would block and lash out with an effective uppercut. Other such moves were happening but I couldn't even begin to name them. Then I assume it was pixie stuff as nails came out and teeth were bared. Even Astley jumped in then to join in the fray.
I was so caught up in watching them that it took me off guard when Astley pounced on me out of nowhere, knocking me to the ground.
"Well, what are you going to do?" he asked fiercely as he pinned me to the ground. He smiled at me wickedly and looked at me with a mischievous grin. He looked like he was leaning in to kiss me, but I wasn't having any of that.
I did what I knew to do best and aimed a knee to his groin, catching him off guard and wiping the grin from his face. That seemed to work because he rolled off me looking very discouraged. From over my shoulder I heard Kam's bellowing laugh.
"Well that was effective," Lia said with a chuckle.
"I would have preferred you to claw or punch," Astley said with a groan.
"But that worked so well," I said as I stood up with a laugh.
Astley didn't respond but worked to come at me again. Using my speed, I dodged out of the way and went around. Apparently everyone decided to gang up on me and before I knew it I was ducking out of the way from Kam's giant meat fists and Lia's lightning fast kicks.
Seconds later, I took a blow to the chest and neck and had my feet knocked out from under me. I felt something akin to adrenaline pumping in my body mixed with anger. Where it came from, I don't know, but it must have been that instinct they were talking about. Sighing in defeat, I let this feeling course through me and let it propel me on. As if it were second nature, I sprung up from the ground and brought my arms out to fight, extending my nails so they were claws.
Feigning left, I went for Dalia and caught her by surprise and got her square on the chest. From the corner of my eye I saw Astley grin. I probably looked silly, but who cared. Next I tried to go after Kam but he was too overpowering for me and I eventually just circled around and went for Astley instead.
"Come and get me princess," he said mockingly. That did it. Before I knew it I was behind him jumping on his back and attacking him with ferocity. He blocked and fought back, but it was clear I was holding my own pretty well.
I didn't stop fighting until I heard Kam's booming voice. "Ok, ok. I think she's got the just of it now. You're gonna get your king all riled up if you continue like that."
At that point I was pinned against a tree with Astley right on me. It was a very compromising position and I couldn't help but to blush at Kam's other meaning. Breathing hard, I tried pushing Astley off but he didn't move.
"Training's over," I said with a pointed stare.
Smiling, he relaxed his grip but not before leaning in and planting a slow kiss on my lips. I was going to punch him away but I felt the connection within flare up. It didn't help that I was still in pixie mode. There was something that had to do with our chemistry going on so instead of pushing away, I gripped him harder and kissed him back.
It wasn't until I heard Kamen cleared his throat that I realized what I was doing and I pulled away embarrassed.
"I told you you'd get him riled up. But it's nice to see the royalty getting along so well. We can only hope you didn't destroy his royal jewels with that kick from earlier," he said laughing and getting a small hit in the arm from Lia who rolled her eyes and winked at me.
"So did I pass? Am I fighting material?" I asked changing the subject and getting out of his grasp.
"I'd say if someone tried to jump you, you'd be prepared. But if you were going into battle, that's another story," Kamen said honestly. "But I'm not aware of any impending battle….we're not going to battle are we, Astley?"
Both his and Lia's eyes were on both of us as he asked the question and I didn't know if I should respond. But luckily Astley was ready for it.
"Not as of yet, but it may be imminent. I'd rather have her prepared none the less. We will actually be travelling…abroad…in 2 days. Can I ask that in that time you keep an eye on things, Kamen," Astley asked. I wanted to do a happy dance right then because it meant that Astley was listening to me when I asked him not to send his men, our men, up there too.
"If you're going anywhere dangerous, I want to be there too," Kamen said, deflating my little happy bubble.
"Me too," Lia said strongly.
"It's not necessary, but I'm honored by your loyalty. It's a complicated situation, but I need you two here to keep an eye out and protect our people if anything happens. It's my wish, or order if you will, that you stand in for me during my leave," Astley said formally. He sounded pretty regal; it was pretty intense.
"I don't like it, but it would be an honor to keep watch for you," Kamen said seriously. "You mind telling me where you are going that's so important and dangerous?"
"I'd rather not just for security purposes," Astley said looking sorry that he had to turn him down. "But when I come back, I will fill you in on everything you missed."
"That's a lame answer, Astley," Lia said jokingly. "Just keep an eye on Zara, here."
"I plan to," he said looking at me seriously.
"Ok so now that we've settled that you are both the seconds in command or what not and that I have the fighting capacity to withstand a mugger or something, can we head back?" We had already spent almost all day training and I was hungry and thirsty and just plain tired. I could go for a really big burger at this point. Not to mention I needed to call Devyn and see what research he brought up in the meantime.
"Dalia and Kamen, you go on ahead. I want to teach Zara one more thing before we leave," Astley said with a wink at me.
"You got it boss," Kam said with a smile. "See you around. Just knock if you want to train again tomorrow."
"Thanks," I said, turning to look at Astley as they walked back toward civilization. "Now what else could you possibly have to show me?" I know I sounded like a whiny teen, but I really was done for the day. It was like school or something.
He walked over till he was right in front of me and removed his glamour. Then he waited as if he wanted me to do the same. Sighing and not really knowing what the point of this was, I obliged and stood there impatiently waiting for him to talk.
"If this is about embracing the blue…" I started.
"Take my hand," he said solemnly.
"What are you going to do?"
"Just give me your hand?" he said impatiently holding out his own.
Just to be able to leave sooner, I obliged and put my hand in his. I felt the familiar thrum that I felt when I was with him and waited for him to begin speaking again.
"I want you to try to get a feel for my emotions…a feel for my energy, aura, whatever you will call it. As my queen, we are paired in such a way that we can find each other no matter the distance. But you need to open yourself up to this and experience it. Test it out. If we get separated I want you to be able to find me if you need to," Astley said staring at me seriously.
Today had gone from using weapons to using my pixie power in all its glory. Go figure. "So you want me to do kind of what you do when I go running around. Because I think I kind of have a feel for that."
"And not only that," he continued, "but when you're aura is open, we are able to share our energy and strength so that if we are hurt or need more power, we can borrow from the other."
"Like when I was changing you lent me some of your strength so it wouldn't hurt as much," I said thinking aloud and shaking off those memories of pain.
"Exactly," he said with concern in his eyes.
"So this holding hands thing is part of it? Because if we are far away, it's not really going to work."
He tilted his head to the side in the universal, "Really?" gesture and grinned at me. "No. This "holding hands thing," he said mockingly, "is for us to get accustomed to the feel of each other's energy. I already am familiar with yours since I already know all these things. You on the other hand, don't know. So I want you to just close your eyes and get a feel for me. Later I will leave your grasp and disappear and see if you can find me."
"Oh we're going to play hide and seek," I responded playfully, but he didn't look like he was in the mood to joke.
"Ok, ok. Let's get this over with so we can head back. I'm starving."
It took me longer than I thought it would, but with some coaching and mental poking from Astley, I was able to understand what he meant. The only thing that was holding me back was I. I was scared that if I let myself go and feel what he wanted, I would lose myself. Not necessarily like I had the last time the need had set in, but to the extent that I would be more pixie than human. I wasn't ready to do that.
"I know you're scared," he said after a time like he was a mind reader. Well, not really mind reading, but he could sense my emotions. I guess that was another good reason to embrace it so that I could feel like a know it all sometimes too. "But this won't hurt you, Zara, and you'll still be you. No one can take that away from you, ok?"
Taking a deep breath, I went with the flow-no pun intended-and used my mind to feel for his energy and emotions. Like a small prism coming into bright blossom, I could almost visualize his spirit. It was a mix of greens and blues, yellows and reds all pulsing and seeming to sing. I smiled at the beauty of it and relaxed as I took it in. I didn't know what to do next, but somehow I knew that the colors represented emotions and if I was reading it right…
"You're happy, yet sad at the same time?" I guessed still keeping my eyes closed.
"You're getting the hang of it," he said sounding relieved. "Just hold on to that feeling and energy so that you can keep that in mind. Focus on the central energy of my force and you will find my strength."
Now it was easier since I knew what he was talking about. I focused in and kind of peered around the edges and sure enough, I could feel his power and strength radiating from the center. I couldn't know for sure, but an experience like this wasn't something I could forget. I felt like now it would be like riding a bicycle to sense out Astley and share our energy.
"This is really weird and trippy," I managed to whisper as I opened my eyes, surprised to see Astley staring intently as me.
"And an effective method of keeping in touch without touching," he said moving out of my grasp. "Try the same thing without my hand in yours."
"That's easy," I said already getting a feel for him. "And you thought I couldn't do it."
"Well you proved me wrong…Alright. Close your eyes and count to ten and try to find me. I guess it is like hide and seek," he said now chuckling.
"Wait. Just curious, but can we find other pixies this way, or only each other." It would come in handy to know if my dad or Garin was sneaking around or something.
"Just us," he said honestly. "Close your eyes."
"Alright, alright…pushy," I mumbled, closing my eyes. I felt like a school kid as I stood there and counted. I was half tempted to count out loud all obnoxiously, but I held back my tongue. I also tried to focus on something else so I wouldn't be tempted to focus in on the sounds he made as he left.
"Ten," I finally yelled out. Why not. I didn't know if I needed to close my eyes again, but I wanted to try it with them open. If I was in the middle of Valhalla or something and I needed to find him, I didn't want to get attacked while I tried to find him.
If only I could find Nick the same way; that would be so much easier. Maybe with my weird touch, emotional power I could find him…But I had to brush those thought aside. I couldn't get distracted right now when I had this to do.
Shaking my shoulders like a boxer going into a ring I focused and thought of Astley's energy. The feeling and imagery pulled me some ways ahead of me into the forest and to the right. I made me way quickly so he wasn't worried that I would fail. I knew I was close now, but I didn't see him yet. Then focusing harder, I smiled and ran about 20 more feet and looked high above me, jumping easily into the trees and into the branches.
There I found Astley perched like a bird looking at me, radiating triumph.
"Good job!" he said with a smile. "Now you're ready."
I couldn't help but to laugh. I had done it. I had fought and thrown my defenses down and embraced things I never thought I would. And I was still Zara. Not some beastly thing I was scared of. It was an exhilarating feeling. If only Nick were here. I knew he'd be proud of my strength and my will to keep going. I don't know if doing such as a pixie would make him less proud or more disappointed. But what kept me going was that this was all for Nick and I was winning.
"See what a little less stubbornness can do?" Astley said with a grin.
I stuck my tongue out at him playfully and jumped gracefully back down to the forest floor. Our little experiment had other thoughts running through my head now. If I could let in this pixie side of me to fight and share energy, maybe I could practice one more thing.
"Astley. There's one more thing I want to do tonight," I said hesitantly.
He jumped down and landed next to me with curiosity lining his face. "And that is?"
"I want to go visit my father for one more bit of training…"
"What could he possibly show you that I can't?" he said sounding confused.
"How to use my true power. I got them from somewhere and it wasn't my mom," I said slowly. "I can only guess he may know what's going on with me. I feel like if I could really harness that power, it would be our biggest asset yet."
"But…" he said, sensing my hesitation.
"But that means I have to trust him and not want to rip his head off," I said with a sigh.
"If you feel that's the best choice, I'm with you," he said, coming over to me and placing an arm on my shoulder.
"I guess it's over the river and through the woods we go, then," I said humorlessly, grabbing his hand and heading in the direction of the house.
It was a long shot, but I wanted to know that when I got to Valhalla I had everything at my disposal. I was bringing Nick back if I had to beat him with my hands or my mind. Either way, I wasn't backing down. If he didn't give up on me, I wouldn't give up on him.
Sorry for the long wait. I was on a long vacation for my friend's wedding—which was awesome. But, I sat down and wrote this chapter and it's my longest yet, like 3,000 words more than my usual. I wanted to make it long to make up for my lack of updating. Hope you like it as I grow nearer to Valhalla day, haha. Enjoy and review. Cheers.