The C-Sec officers roughly escorted Commander Shepard into Councilor Anderson's office. The Councilor was standing on the balcony with his back to the door.

"Anderson," greeted Shepard.

He did not turn around. "Thank you, officers. You're dismissed." The officers nodded and left without a word.

Activating his omni-toool, he announced "This conversation will be recorded. Do you require legal assistance?"

Shepard was taken aback. "What? Since when do I need a lawyer to talk to you?"

"Sorry, Shepard. Sparatus insisted we do this by the book. Have a seat." He gestured to a chair in front of his desk. They both sat down.

"Is this about that incident with Grunt? I thought we already-"

Anderson shook his head. "Shepard, I need to know where you've been for the past several hours."

"OK. The collectors have, well, had, a base on the far side of the Omega 4 relay. I destroyed it, along with the baby reaper they were building out of our missing colonists."

"What do you mean by 'building?'" Anderson didn't entirely want an answer to the question.

"They were... liquifying people, with some kind of nanotech. Melting them down into gray goo. I don't really understand the science, but I've got some specialists on the Normandy if you want-"

"No, that's all right," interrupted the Councilor. "I assume your crew was with you?"

"Of course. Some of them had been captured and we had to rescue them, but they were all there."

"I suppose that makes it a little easier, then... but it's not like they believed your crew last time. Are you still with Cerberus?"

"No, I walked away as soon as the mission was complete. Anderson, what's going on?" implored Shepard.

"One more question, then I can end the interview: Do you know anything about a frigate called the Defiant?"

"Her captain's aboard the Normandy right now. Why?"

This was not the response Anderson had anticipated. "What?"

"He volunteered to help us about 30-something hours ago. We brought some of his people with us to the collector base. Even rescued one of them."

"I see. I'll need to speak with him, then." He got up.

"Anderson..."

He hesitated, then made a decision. "A few hours ago, a Cerberus shuttle rendezvoused with the Defiant. The shuttle was registered as a companion vessel to the Normandy, but those records are easily forged and the Kodiak design isn't exactly a well-kept secret. A few minutes later, the Defiant put out a distress signal claiming piracy. We're still trying to figure out who owns her and what she's doing here."

Shepard's eyes widened. "And the Council thinks I had something to do with the attack. Why didn't you tell me?"

Anderson shut off the omni-tool recording. "I wanted to establish your ignorance of the situation, on the record," he replied. "I'm sure once this captain vouches for you, we'll get it straightened out."

"Anderson, there's something else. The Council's never going to believe it, but she's a Star Trek ship."

Anderson frowned. "You mean she's dressed up like one?"

"No. She's really from Star Trek, as far as we can tell."

"I guess that explains the bizarre design and lack of registration. Just how sure are you?" asked Anderson.

"I've got a ferengi, a klingon, a trill, a bajoran, a shapeshifter, and one of the Salarian Union's best biologists back on the Normandy. Add all the technobabble-that-works and we're pretty sure they're for real," Shepard explained.

Anderson put his hand to his chin. "Get your biologist to write Valern a report. With luck, we can get him on our side. I think I can get Tevos to go along with it; she won't want a 2-2 split. But don't mention Star Trek itself. There's only so many bridges we can sell the Council at once. For the moment, they're from a parallel dimension and that's it."

"Are you sure it's a good idea to lie to the Council?"

Anderson looked out the window. "I'm not wild about it. But I can't see them believing some people from an old vid just fell out of the sky. Call it a lie of omission, for now. Once they've accepted it for a few weeks, we can finish the story."

"There's another thing."

He sighed. "Of course there is. Let's hear it."

"In their universe, we're the fictional ones."

He shook his head. "No, the Council isn't going to believe that either. All the same, see what you can get out of it. If you make a real prediction that comes true, I'll take it to the Council." He put his hand to his forehead. "I could really use a Star Trek expert right about now. Where do you find someone like that with a security clearance, without arousing suspicion?"

She smiled. "Kaidan. He was helping you investigate Cerberus, wasn't he? That's what he told me on Horizon, anyway. Say you brought him in to figure out what The Illusive Man is planning."

"He's a Trekkie? I never would've guessed." Anderson seemed pleased with the convenience.

"I think he prefers 'Trekker,' but yeah, he is. Was there anything else?"

"Yes. We still need to brief the captain of the Defiant. What's his name?" asked Anderson.

"Benjamin Sisko. You can tell Kaidan he's from DS9."

"And the Major will know what that means?" Anderson certainly didn't.

"Major? Good for him," remarked Shepard, nodding.

"Glad to see you forgive and forget so easily." Anderson headed for the door. "In the mean time, Captain Sisko and his crew will probably want a look at the Defiant."

Garrus and Tali stepped into the Huerta Memorial Hospital. As they approached the front desk, Garrus cleared his throat. "Hi, we know a drell patient named Thane Krios, and we were hoping to see him. Can you tell us anything?"

The asari nurse consulted her computer. "Are you Garrus Vakarian? Mr. Krios authorized us to discuss his condition with you."

Garrus nodded, and used his omni-tool to verify his identity.

"I'm afraid your friend was pretty badly hurt. They've stabilized him, and he is conscious. But the blood loss exacerbated his Kepral's syndrome, and we're concerned about his long-term prognosis."

"Will he be released any time soon?" asked Tali.

"The doctors want to run more tests to investigate the progress of his disease. He'll probably be out in a few weeks, but I doubt he'll be able to resume his athletic lifestyle. In the mean time, you can visit him, right down the hall."

"Thank you," replied Garrus. The two of them walked to Thane's room.

The assassin was lying on a hospital bed, bandages covering the stump where his arm used to be. The doctors had replaced his leather jacket with a gown. "Garrus. Tali. Good to see familiar faces again."

"Are you all right, Thane?" asked Tali.

Thane looked away, out a nearby window. "This was not how I imagined it would end," he replied. "Kolyat visited me. He is making progress, but... we still don't see eye to eye."

"Don't push him too hard," suggested Garrus. "I've been on the receiving end. He needs tough love, but he also needs time and understanding."

Tali rolled her eyes, though no one could see it. Everyone thinks they know how to parent, she thought. It's never that easy, or else father would've... Her inner voice trailed off.

The drell sighed. "It seems time is on my side. When my barriers gave way and I collapsed, I assumed Kalahira herself would wake me. Instead, I returned to the land of the living. For what purpose, I know not."

Tali touched Thane's shoulder momentarily. "We're here for you, Thane."

He returned her gaze with a small smile. "Thank you, Tali. I may be out of the fight, but at least I am not alone."

The C-Sec shuttle touched down in one of the Defiant's shuttle bays. Anderson, Shepard, Sisko, and his crew got out.

"We've already done a sweep for hostiles and traps, so it should be safe to proceed," explained Anderson. "We'll follow your lead, Captain Sisko."

Sisko nodded. "Any survivors?"

"We found a number of bajoran bodies, most wearing security uniforms. With the numbers you gave us, we believe we've accounted for everyone aboard. It's a good thing you only had a skeleton crew here, or this could've been a massacre." He frowned. "But there was one survivor, not on your manifest. A... ferengi, I think. We weren't able to speak with him in any standard Citadel language, so your translators may have failed."

"I see. Mr. O'Brien, go check the ship's systems."

"Aye, sir," replied the Chief. He headed for main engineering.

"Councilor, please take us to this ferengi," requested Sisko.

"Of course. He's in the mess. He understood enough to stay put, at least. Follow me." Anderson led the group to a Jeffries tube. "We weren't able to get any of the turbolifts running, so we had to make do with these."

They climbed into the vertical tube and ascended a deck in silence. As they exited onto deck 2, O'Brien contacted Sisko.

"Captain, we've got a problem. I'll explain when we get to the bridge, but for now, the computer isn't going to be working any time soon."

Sisko activated his badge. "Understood, Chief. I'll meet you there once we're finished down here."

"What did he mean by 'any time soon?'" asked Garak. "We're going to need that Mass Effect intel eventually."

Dax shrugged. "I'm sure he's doing everything he can."

Anderson pushed a sliding door open. In the mess hall was Quark.

"Uncle Quark!" exclaimed Nog. "What are you doing here?"

Kira frowned. "Don't you remember? We brought him because he knows the Gamma Quadrant better than we do."

Sisko gave Kira a concerned look. "I don't remember that."

Worf folded his arms. "Neither do I."

"Benjamin," interjected Dax. "That's exactly what I remember."

"Me too," added Quark. "Speaking of which, anyone mind telling me what's going on?"

Q flashed into existence. "Sorry, folks. Technical difficulties. The prophets regularly screw up linear time, so you may notice... glitches in your memories. It's nothing to worry about." He vanished before anyone could reply.

Anderson frowned. "Should I just pretend I understand what's going on?"

"That's what I've been doing," replied Shepard.

Quark made a dismissive gesture. "Great, more humons I can't understand. A little help, here?"

Bashir grabbed a tricorder and opened it. "Even if the ship's systems are down, your personal translator should be working. Let me have a look." He scanned the ferengi's head. "I wouldn't believe it if I didn't see it for myself. It crashed in the middle of a correlative update. I'll just reboot it."

"A what?" asked Sisko.

"Universal translators aren't really universal," explained Dax. "They study the structure and form of spoken and written text in order to 'learn' the language. But languages evolve all the time. It would take an enormous amount of computing power just to keep pace with this natural evolution, given the number of languages the translator needs to track, and they're also expected to learn new languages rapidly. Since some installations aren't powerful enough for that, or aren't exposed to enough material to learn at the required rate, they exchange information with one another periodically. These are called 'correlative updates,' to distinguish them from more general software updates that don't involve linguistic information. In this case, I suspect Quark's translator was updating with the ship's computer, and the computer went down at just the wrong time. The translator's limited software couldn't handle that, so it crashed."

"This is all very fascinating," began Kira, with a fake smile, "but I'd rather talk about who attacked the ship, if that's all right with everyone else?"

There were no objections.

"So, Quark, what do you remember?" asked Kira.

The bartender scratched his head. "Well, I didn't get a very good look at him. He was human and had a nasty looking sword."

Shepard pointed to a Cerberus logo on her lapel. "Was he wearing this symbol?"

Quark nodded. "I think so. Did you know him?"

"No, but Miranda might. Not a lot of people carry swords these days."

Sisko frowned. "Wait a minute. Are you saying one man took the whole ship?"

Kira shrugged. "It was a skeleton crew, and he did have the element of surprise."

"But who brings a sword to a phaser fight, and then wins? He must have had help."

"If he did," replied Anderson, "they used swords too. We found no kinetic weapon damage, no gunshot wounds. Just broken bones and lacerations. We assumed they were killed with ultrafine submission nets."

"Is there anything else you can tell us?" asked Shepard.

Quark shook his head. "That's all I remember."

O'Brien turned as the rest of the group arrived. "Welcome to the bridge, such as it is."

"And just how is it?" asked Sisko.

"Pretty bad. They wiped the computer before they left."

As varying levels of shock filtered through the group, Shepard put up a hand. "Hold on. This is easily the single largest database in Council space. You're saying they wiped the whole thing clean in a matter of hours?"

"Minutes," corrected Anderson.

"Well, no," admitted O'Brien. "But they did erase the index, which is the next best thing. Without that, you'll never find anything useful. You'd have to manually examine every record. But it gets worse. They also deleted most of the core LCARS files." Seeing blank looks from Anderson and Shepard, he added "LCARS is the operating system our computers run on. Without it, we can't even fly the ship."

"Why is the warp core still functional?" asked Worf.

"How do you know it is?" countered Anderson.

Worf folded his arms. "If it had breached, we'd know."

"The warp core is controlled by a separate computer," explained O'Brien. "It is connected to the main computer, but the connection is heavily firewalled. We can't risk any old computer virus potentially destroying a whole starship."

"What are our options, Chief?" asked Sisko.

"Two choices, both bad," reported the chief. "Option one, we reinstall LCARS from scratch and lose all the data. Option two, we comb the database manually, recover what we can, and then implement option one."

"How long?"

"That depends on our search strategy," replied O'Brien. "If we just look at each entry by hand, it would take decades, maybe even centuries. We need some kind of automation."

"What about a VI?" suggested Anderson. "They're specifically designed to search and process massive amounts of data rapidly."

O'Brien shook his head. "Our database greatly exceeds your entire extranet in sheer volume of data. A VI would speed it up, but it'd still be months at least."

Worf folded his arms. "Then this information is lost. We must restore the Defiant to working order as quickly as possible."

"What good would that do?" asked Garak. "As I understand, we can't take her through mass relays, and the Citadel is easily the safest place in the galaxy, recent events notwithstanding. It's very likely the attackers made copies of the most relevant portions of our database."

Shepard's voice took on a skeptical tone. "What, you think they just plugged in an OSD and dragged and dropped the files?"

"No, but they could just take pictures of the screen with an omni-tool. Anyway, if we wipe the database now, we're conceding that advantage to Cerberus for no benefit. We should at least hold an all-hands meeting. Maybe someone else will have a better idea."

Worf glared at the cardassian. "If we're so safe here, why were we attacked?"

"Because," replied Anderson, "you didn't register with Citadel Flight Control. We had no idea you were out here."

Sisko considered his options. "Garak is right. We can't throw away vital information if there might be some way to recover it. We'll hold that meeting as soon as possible. But if nothing comes up, I'm not about to leave the Defiant adrift forever."

"It will be towed into dock, not adrift." Anderson checked his omni-tool. "Kaidan will be here in a few hours. We might as well put off the meeting until then."

[This note is about continuity. If you don't care for fanwankery, you can probably skip it, but please don't later complain about things addressed herein. Because I'd rather not surprise you, I've decided to work out exactly what's in-continuity with this fic. Actually, that's a lie: I love surprising you, but not unfairly. So without further ado, here is The List:

The fic is definitely in-continuity with the following:

Everything on Memory Alpha except the 2009 reboot (i.e. the live-action Star Trek TV shows and films)

The three Mass Effect games, including all DLC except Pinnacle Station

The first three Mass Effect novels

All Mass Effect comics which appeared in Mass Effect Library Edition, Volume 1 (basically everything up to and including Homeworlds)

The Blasto comic (interpreted as an in-universe publication: "Hey Garrus, did you read the latest Blasto comic?")

The fic is definitely out of continuity with the following:

The 2009 Star Trek film and its sequel Star Trek Into Darkness (which is spelled with no colon for reasons understood only by J. J. Abrams)

Any Star Trek material which is not included in Memory Alpha (i.e. licensed works, TAS, etc., basically all EU stuff)

Any other fan works, including game mods, fics besides this one, etc.

Any small and internal contradictions or inconsistencies in the source materials (particularly numerical discrepancies)

The following things are indeterminate, mostly because I have not experienced them (yet):

All other Mass Effect comics (particularly Foundation)

Pinnacle Station (ugh, I don't really have to play that, do I?)

Mass Effect: Deception (at least until Bioware's mythical fixed version is on the shelves)

Anything not listed above (particularly things which have not been published yet)

The Star Trek and Mass Effect universes are of greatly different sizes, so it was hard to be fair here. Bioware runs a very tight ship in the Mass Effect EU, whereas even Star Trek's primary 'verse can get weird at times. The other issue, of course, is that the Star Trek EU is not officially accepted as canon, while the Mass Effect games make frequent reference to their own EU. Including the Mass Effect EU and excluding the Star Trek EU was the path of least resistance. Thanks for reading.]