AN: Review or PM me any ideas you might have. No guarantees I'll do it, but if I like it enough then I probably will! Can include pairings.
Plot: It's girls night and they're on youtube. They find a show called my strange addiction...
Credit: Taken from an episode o My Strange Addiction on youtube, the talk in italics is from the show. www. youtube watch? v =ONBG IMrlSjw&feature =related (remove spaces)

Youtube

Mikaela Banes was no longer a teenage girl, but that didn't mean she couldn't get her kicks gossiping with the girls. Judy Lennox and Maggie Madsen were heaven sent on a base predominantly made up of male soldiers, and then alien life forms that identified as male, though it had been explained time and time again that Cybertronians didn't have genders.

Tonight was a Saturday night, their Saturday night. They always took up the rec-room for it, everybody and mech else kicked out. It was widely accepted at the base that no one tried to get in on girls night. Robert Epps had done it just once and had refused to ride in any of the 'bots since unless it was an emergency. Mikaela, Maggie, and Judy used their night to just joke around, poke fun at the soldiers, themselves, the 'bots, the 'cons, relax, and anything else they wanted. One topic favorite was humans and Cybertronians getting it on, and although Sam and Mikaela were happily married, Sam was often the unknowing victim of these talks.

Had he or Bumblebee ever known just how detailed these talks sometimes got, all three girls were fairly certain Bumblebee would have just grabbed his Charge and gone on the longest vacation in the existence of ever, which would only add fuel to the fire, but would get them both far, far away.

When Mikaela walked in, having sent Sam off with a kiss and Bumblebee a wave, Maggie and Sarah had been crowded around Maggie's laptop, giggling over a youtube video. Mikaela instantly pulled up a chair, reading the title briefly. My Strange Addiction, from that title alone she knew whatever it was was going to be good. Maggie barely glanced over before she restarted the video so Mikaela could see what was going on.

"I'm addicted to my car… It was love at first sight."
"…find this part of him the most sexy, just 'cuz of the subtle lines and curves. I'll give him a kiss here, and just kind of caress him down the side."
"We have our times when we get sexual. What we do the most often is I like to lean over his fender and across his hood… and kind of press up against him and just rub against him."

Mikaela couldn't hold in her laughter anymore, it was just too perfect.

"Sam…" Bumblebee started only to trail off, shifting nervously on his shocks.

Since Mikaela was spending time with the girls, Sam thought it would be the perfect time to wash his Guardian. Sam thought it was nice being able to do something for the 'bot who'd saved his life and become a close friend, and Bumblebee appreciated because humans could get hard to reach places and it felt like a nice massage if done right. It had been too hot during the day, and though it was stifling at night in the outdoors, Sam just took his shirt off and donned some shorts, getting out the hose, buckets, sponges, clothes, special car wash, and wax.

Except ten minutes in they weren't alone anymore. Mikaela, Maggie, and Sarah had wandered out of the rec-room, coming to find Sam washing Bumblebee on the still hot tarmac. All three women were watching the show, whispering and giggling to themselves, and all of them had a drink in their hand.

The women thought Sam and Bumblebee had no idea what they talked about, but Robert wasn't known for keeping his mouth shut. It had surprisingly freaked out Bumblebee more than Sam, the boy happy as long as he didn't have to hear them and it satisfied his wife's desires to obsess over crazy things. He'd known from the start how incredibly sexual things could be taken with the Cybertronians, just riding inside of them could be embarrassing at first given the right frame of mind.

"Yeah, Bee?" Sam asked, trying to ignore the three giggling girls.

"They have those leers on…" Bumblebee trailed off again, only this time to keep the whine out of his voice. "The same ones they had when we came to retrieve Bobby from his time with them, and he freaked out after getting inside of me."

"I know, buddy. Just try to ignore them."

Bumblebee tried to listen to his Charge, trying to relax into the gentle ministrations, but that was extremely hard to do when he picked up all three women staring so intently. It wasn't until Sam leaned half way over his hood, nearly sprawled out on it because he was too lazy to walk around to reach the other side, that the women paused in their talk, watching. Then they let out a few catcalls and wolf whistles, and Bumblebee had had enough. He got out his holoform and grabbed Sam from behind, ignoring the startled squeak and just picking the boy up, practically tossing him inside the driver's seat before driving off.

Sam was too stunned to talk for a minute, sitting up and tossing a sour look at the radio. "Don't you think you're overreacting?"

"You didn't see the looks on their faces, Sam!"

"Bee, it's going to be worse now that you threw me inside of you and raced off." Sam pointed out gently, raising an eyebrow.

"Primus save me…"