Disclaimer: As always I own nothing but the original characters and the twisting of the Disney lyrics and BLEACH characters. Thanks for continuing to read, I hope you like this latest set of songs!
Twenty-Sixth Act
CQueen: Hi there, everyone, have you all been missing me horribly, pining away from lack of attention? Wishing desperately that I would abandon my Harry Potter fics so that we could spend some quality time together?
Hitsugaya: Please tell me you're being sarcastic.
CQueen: Well of course I'm being sarcastic. I'm not an idiot.
Renji: That would be open to some debate.
CQueen: Do you really want to get into an argument with me about which of us is smarter? Because you'll lose, Tattoo Boy. They didn't give me a university diploma this month for shits and giggles. I earned that, Bonehead.
Ichigo: She probably went to Rocky and Bullwinkle's Watsumatta U.
CQueen: Don't push me, boyo. It would not end well for you.
Rukia: They're both very sorry, CQueen, you have my word on that.
Ichigo: Speak for yourself.
CQueen: Well as it is I've got the three songs for today already planned out, so your smart mouths won't get you into trouble unless one of you really, really pisses me off.
Rukia: So which of us are being used for your stupid reviewers' entertainment today?
CQueen: If I told you that it wouldn't be a surprise. And we had a talk about you dissing my reviewers, don't make me lecture you lot again. Or punish you again either. There are plenty of embarrassing songs I've kindly not exposed you to. That could change.
Byakuya: There are worse? How much worse?
CQueen: You really, really don't want to know. And now, for the first song, we have Kon singing a little tune from 'Treasure Planet' called 'I'm Still Here'. It's my first time using a song from this movie and this is the only one from it I probably can use. So enjoy.
**head bong and Kon appears onstage dressed in pirate clothes**
Kon:
I am a question to the world
Not an answer to be heard
Or a moment
That's held in your arms
And what do you think you'd ever say?
I won't listen anyway
You don't know me
And I'll never be what I want me to be
And what do you think you'd understand?
I'm a toy, no, I'm a man
You can't take me
And throw me away
And how can you learn what's never shown?
Yeah, you stand here on your own
They don't know me
Cause I'm not here
And I want a moment to be real
Wanna touch breasts I wanna feel
Wanna hold on and feel I belong
And how can the girl want me to change?
They're the ones that stay the same
They don't know me
Cause I'm not here
And you see the things they never see
All you wanted I could be
Now you know me
And I'm not afraid
And I want to tell you who I am
Can you help me be a man?
They can't break me
As long as I know who I am
They can't tell me who to be
Cause I'm not what they see
Yeah, the world is still sleepin while I keep on dreaming for me
And their words are just whispers and lies that I'll never believe
And I want a moment to be real
Wanna touch breasts I wanna feel
Wanna hold on and feel I belong
And how can the world want me to change?
They're the ones that stay the same
They don't know me
Cause I'm not here
I'm the one now
Cause I'm still here
I'm the one
Cause I'm still here
I'm still here
I'm still here
I'm still here
**head bong and Kon's back in his seat**
CQueen: Okay, so you gotta admit, that was funny.
Matsumoto: Only because he can't bury his face in the valley between your breasts.
CQueen: I'll give you that. Of course if he did that to me I'd just smother the little bastard between them.
Kon: You're just mad cause yours aren't as big as hers.
Kyoraku: Dude, never insult a woman's breast size. You'll end up being torn to shreds at a daycare center before you can blink. It would be that preview of Toy Story 3 all over again.
CQueen: And just how would you know anything about Toy Story 3?
Matsumoto: We asked Nemu to show us a bunch of Disney movies so we'd know what to expect. One of them had previews for Toy Story 3. I felt really sorry for those toys, let me tell you.
CQueen: Wait till you see the movie, you'll feel even worse.
Gin: Did they ruin the franchise for ya?
CQueen: No, it was really good, but I did tear up a little at the ending. You'll understand when you see it. And if you weren't good to your toys, I guarantee you'll leave the theatre feeling terrible about yourself.
Yachiru: And did you feel terrible?
CQueen: Sort of. I still have the most important toy from my childhood though and I honestly would go back into a burning building to rescue it. Me and Toto go back to before I can remember. I totally freaked the one time I lost him.
Ichigo: Toto?
CQueen: My Teddy. I named him after the dog from "The Wizard of Oz". Don't ask me why I named a teddy bear after a dog, I couldn't tell you. Anyways, he's seen better days owing to decades of hugs.
Matsumoto: Awww.
CQueen: But enough about him, it's time to move on to the next song! This one will be a duet between father and daughter, one that I think suits well enough. So here is Karin and her daddy singing a song from 'The Lion King 2: Simba's Pride' called 'We Are One'.
**head bong and Karin and Isshin are onstage dressed in lion costumes**
Isshin:
As you go through life you'll see
There is so much that we
Don't understand
And the only thing we know
Is things don't always go
The way we planned
But you'll see every day
That we'll never turn away
When it seems all your dreams come undone
We will stand by your side
Filled with hope and filled with pride
We are more than we are
We are one
Karin:
If there's so much I must be
Can I still just be me
The way I am?
Can I trust in my own heart
Or am I just one part
Of some big plan?
Isshin:
Even those who are gone
Are with us as we go on
Your journey has only begun
Tears of pain, tears of joy
One thing nothing can destroy
Is our pride, deep inside
We are one
We are one, you and I
We are like the earth and sky
One family under the sun
All the wisdom to lead
All the courage that you need
You will find when you see
We are one.
**head bong and they return to their seats**
Isshin: I got to sing such a beautiful song with my daughter **bursts out crying**
Ichigo: Oh geez, Dad. Get ahold of yourself, will you?
Karin: Please tell me I at least get to grow up into a totally kickass lioness in the movie.
CQueen: I wouldn't say kickass, though she wasn't a wimp either. You got the guy though, if that makes you feel better.
Ichigo: It doesn't.
CQueen: Wasn't talking to you, Carrot Head
Yuzu: Well I thought it was a nice song and I think we should move on to the next.
Hana: Yes, that would be best, wouldn't it?
Isane: You mean best for everyone besides the person stuck singing the last song. She always saves a special song for last, doesn't she?
Yachiru: Bead Head might be on to something there. So who is the last singer today?
Ichigo: It better not be anyone in my family.
Nanao: You do realize that just tempts her to mess with you more, don't you?
CQueen: Well as it happens no member of the Kurosaki family will be singing the last song. The last song, since you're all so eager to get to it, will be sung by the second division captain. It's from Toy Story 2, and just like our first song this is the first song from that Disney movie. It's called 'When Somebody Loved Me'.
Soifon: Make someone else your puppet, you crazy moron.
CQueen: Sorry, but this song is absolutely made for you and you can't talk me out of it.
Yoruichi: I'll do it for her, would that be alright?
Soifon: Captain! No.
CQueen: No is right.
**head bong and Soifon appears onstage dressed up like a traditional Chinese doll**
Soifon:
When my captain loved me,
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart
And when she was sad,
I was there to dry her tears
And when she was happy,
So was I
When she loved me
Through the summer and the fall
We had each other, that was all
Just she and I together,
Like it was meant to be
And when she was lonely,
I was there to comfort her
And I knew that she loved me
So the years went by
I stayed the same
But she began to drift away
I was left alone
Still I waited for the day
When she'd say I will always love you
Lonely and forgotten,
I'd never thought she'd look my way
And she smiled at me and held me just like she used to do
Like she loved me
When she loved me
When my captain loved me
Everything was beautiful
Every hour we spent together lives within my heart
When she loved me
**head bong for Soifon to return to her seat**
**Soifon faints dead away from the embarrassment**
Omaeda: Captain!
Yoruichi: No! I am so, so sorry! Forgive me, Soifon, I'm the worst former captain ever!
CQueen: And on that happy note we'll see you all next time.
**curtains closes**