Section Thirteen - Results

The Ring

As Huitzil entered the ring, Wolverine went nuts. "SENTINEL!" he yelled, dashing forward and slashing madly. The Aztec robot went down before the onslaught presented by adamantium claws.

Meanwhile, Chun Li was being pounded upon by Mai Shiranui. "I (WHAM) really (WHAM) wish (WHAM) you'd (WHAM) listen to (WHAM) me! I had (WHAM) nothing (WHAM) to do (WHAM) with the (WHAM) elim- (WHAM) -ination (WHAM) of Team (WHAM England (WHAM)! So (WHAM) stop (WHAM) hitting (WHAM) me! YAPYAPYAPYAP!" Chun Li finished off Mai Shiranui with a Hundred-Foot Kick, knocking the KOFer into the acid.

Blade entered the ring, checking his wrist-gauntlets to make sure they were fully charged. He HAD to eliminate somebody, or the Eternal Champions would *never* gain the necessary nodal power to get an arcade link. He aimed his wrist-blaster at Morrigan, targetting her for an energy drain. However, at that precise moment, Wolverine slammed into him with a Drill Claw. The surprised Blade then felt a double slash from the mutant warrior, knocking him back over the ropes. He saw Larcen shaking his head as he fell into the moat.

Meanwhile, Huitzil used this time to recover, and began an onslaught. Wolf was hit by a rocket. Charlotte and Wolverine were clipped by double ice lasers. Haohmaru, jumping in, was slammed with a huge spiked ball. A drill gouged into Chun Li. The robot seemed unstoppable.

At that precise moment, a massive icy blue laser blasted through the ring, washing over Huitzil. The giant robot disappeared in the glare. When the energy finally died down, all that could be seen of Huitzil was a vaguely robot-shaped ice cube. Sasquatch walked over and punched the ice cube into the acid, where it began bubbling. Huitzil began to be visible, and his optic sensors were now beeping frantically as the ice was dissolved away.

With all eyes on Sasquatch's actions, no one noticed Lawrence Blood enter the ring. He quickly ran over and Bloody Flashed Chun Li, but nobody even diverted an eye. (Not even the heckler.) He finally lost it. "HELLO! I AM LAWRENCE BLOOD! I AM FIGHTING HERE!"

Wolverine blinked. "Hey, Larry, welcome to the..."

"I AM NOT CALLED LARRY!"

"Geez, touchy..." and Wolverine Tornado Clawed him into the acid.

Meanwhile, Wolf and Haohmaru were exchanging blows.

"AWOOOOOOOO!"

"HA!"

"AWOOOOOOOO!"

"HEH!"

Over in another corner, Mike Haggar (just arrived) was beating up on Morrigan. He laughed as he got up from the succubus' Hell Ride. "Heh... not bad," he said, rubbing his jaw, "but I think this is better." He quickly grabbed Morrigan and jumped upwards, flipping her into position, and landing with her in the original Jumping Piledriver that Zangief had tried to improve upon.

He helped her to her feet. "Nothing personal. You're a great fighter, kid."

"Why, thank you. But I'm afraid it doesn't pay to be polite these days." And she Shadow Bladed him up and over.

Balrog was also in the ring now, and he felt quite at home as he Turnaround Punched Sasquatch into the ropes. He grinned with satisfaction as he saw the bigfoot smoke in the electrical field.

"AWOOOOOO!"

"HA!"

"AWOOOOOO!"

"HEH!"

"AWOOOOOO!"

"TEMPIN FUGET ZAN!"

*splash*

"HA!"

As Wan-Fu entered the ring, he slammed Charlotte with his large pillar. "Hey, baby, look! I have a bigger, thicker weapon than Haohmaru!"

Charlotte looked disgusted as she slammed the Chinese king with a Power Gradiation. "It's not how big it is, it's how you use it." She then stabbed him with her epee. Blood gushed out, and Wan-Fu fell to the mat. She hefted the big man's body over the ropes. "And endurance helps, too."

As this happened, Balrog, who was getting pummelled by Jon Talbain, looked forward as he saw the werewolf begin a Pinball Beast Rush. He groaned as the pinball action knocked him over the ropes.

However, as Jon came out of the Pinball, he looked down, to see that he'd overshot the ring! As he fell, he tried to angle his descent, just barely managing to land on the mat outside the ropes. He got up, wondering how he was going to get over the damn thing.

"Soul Fist!"

Oh, no. thought the wolfman. As the small psychic bat slammed into him, he had time to think *I will never make fun of that thing again...*

Suddenly, lightning crackled overhead. Shao Kahn had entered the ring.

"HA! DIE BY MY SWORD, EVIL EMPEROR! I SHALL RETURN YOU TO YOUR TWISTED WORLD IN PIECES!"

"Amusing. Do your worst."

Shao Kahn blocked as Haohmaru stabbed at him with his katana, and promptly shoulder-slammed the samurai. Haohmaru got up, and quickly got a big boot to the head in return. Haohmaru jumped to his feet, receiving another shoulder-slam which knocked him to the ropes.

The samural got up, dizzy. Shao Kahn got down on one knee, planning to deliver the coup de grace with his Power Javelin. However, at that exact moment Charlotte slammed into the Outworld ruler with a desperate Splash Fount. Shao Kahn was knocked forward... into Haohmaru, who staggered toward him and vaulted the Outworld emperor into the acid. Charlotte ran to Haohmaru.

"You all right?"

"HA! IT'LL TAKE... (puff) MORE THAN THAT...(huff) TO FINISH ME OFF (puff) BECAUSE AFTER ALL (huff) I AM THE LEGENDARY HAOHMARU!"

Both started to walk away, to fight again...but were both seized by the hands of Shao Kahn, dripping acid. "Ah, but it is not that easy to get rid of me, either. Hmmm? Perhaps you simply need an education in pain." With that, Shao Kahn began to kick at Charlotte while tightening his grip around Haohmaru's throat. Haohmaru, beginning to black out, noticed that Shao Kahn had somehow nullified the field on that side of the ring with an odd device at his belt. He slashed desperately at it, failing to knock it off, but slicing a mean wound across Shao Kahn's belly in the process. The Kahn staggered, dropping both fighters. Haohmaru, breathing heavily, jumped forward, punching and slashing at the huge Outworlder. Shao Kahn teetered on the edge of the acid. Haohmaru could see a mine floating underneath. "CHARLOTTE! PUSH US OVER! NOW!"

"No! I won't kill you!"

"HA! IT IS A TEMPORARY DEATH, GIRL! HURRY UP! HE'S STARTING TO RECOVER!"

Charlotte wordlessly rushed and triangle-slashed the ruler of the Outworld. The Kahn fell over, Haohmaru kicking at him for extra leverage. Charlotte grabbed desperately for Haohmaru as Shao Kahn fell onto the mine, just barely grabbing the samurai.

BOOM!

With the death of the Kahn's device, the field was restored back to normal. Haohmaru and Charlotte lay on the better side of it.

Charlotte grinned. "See what we can do when we work together?"

"HA! I HAVE NEVER DOUBTED YOU... TO BE AN EXCELLENT FIGHTER!"

"I'm excellent at a good many things, Haohmaru..."

Their faces hovered close, inches away from each other.

"Excuse me, but now that you've beaten the bad guy, can we please get back to fighting?" yelled Wolverine.

"HA! CERTAINLY!" yelled Haohmaru, leaping up and running for the mutant.

Charlotte groaned.

Original Authors
Chris "Birdman" Bird
Bob "Boobwod" Wood
Brant Rogers