Chapter 25: The Gift of Men

I was resting on a not so much comfortable bed in the infirmary. On too many occasions I've been watching this ceiling. The humming coming from the instruments has become familiar. I've been there too many times, as a patient or as a guest waiting for John's recovery. This time, I honestly felt drained. Too much happened and it happened too quickly. This world was moving too fast. I accepted it better when I was in control. Lying on this bed, I was not in control anymore.

I let myself dose off few times before feeling a presence next to me. John was by my side and his figure and face appeared clearly after few second fighting with a blurry vision.

"Hey, you slept a great deal. Feeling better today?" John kissed my forehead and sat on the edge of the bed.

"I don't recall sleeping so much anytime in my life! But I feel better indeed. I only wish to get back to my quarters soon." I moved slowly to reach a sitting position.

"Dr. Keller said you needed some rest. She was reluctant to let you go before having run all the tests she wanted."

"Can you ask her how long it will take to …" I was interrupted by Dr. Keller who was coming toward us. "Hello Doctor, I was just wondering about the duration of my stay here." She smiled warmly at me.

"Yes… I didn't feel it was cautious to let you go without having the results of the tests I've asked. And uh… I just got them back and I wanted to talk with you about them." Jennifer Keller bore a serious look. I understood that there was a problem, but in the other hand I had felt a bit better everyday.

"Okay… Doc?" John wondered as she seemed to have frozen while looking at the documents she brought. I felt John's hand squeezing mine.

"I was thinking… I will try to make it simple. We ran extensive blood tests. Our first concern was to check on the presence of the feeding enzyme in your blood. The good thing is that we didn't find any. However, I found something odd when I compared your blood test with our database. A slight difference. So I ran more tests." Dr. Keller was checking on her document. My tension increased. She breathed deeply before continuing.

"It seems that the feedings were not as harmless on you than I initially thought. Given your particular metabolism, it was not something I could have foreseen. We found that your DNA has been altered." She paused as I frowned. "It is the genetic material packed into chromosomes that are contained by all the cells in your body. This is basically the library of your body. In the life of a human cell, the tip of the chromosomes, the telomeres, are slowly cut down by a protein. They get shorter as we grow older. It is a natural process. But it is not the case for your race. When Carson ran the first tests on you DNA, he did not find this protein and, as a result, your telomeres do not get shortened. This might be one of the reasons explaining the longevity of your race. It was Carson's hypothesis and it is indeed the most sensible explanation."

"I do not understand what is altered now." I was confused and scared. I knew something bad was on its way.

"As I told you, we have a copy of your DNA and of its characteristics in our database. It seems that the feedings took a toll on your telomeres. They show signs of degradation. Nothing alarming though, but it seems that the natural shortening we observe for human telomeres is now affecting yours. Indeed, we detecting the presence of the cutting protein. The synthesis of this protein might have been triggered by the feedings. If the preservation of your telomeres was the reason of your longevity, I presume that you do not possess anymore… Well, according to the results, they do get shortened."

"At which rate?" John asked worriedly.

"It seems to be the same rate as the one known for humans." Dr. Keller answered.

"So, am I dying? Is this what you are saying?" I looked at her straight in the eyes.

"It's… eventually, yes. What I'm saying is that it looks like your cells will grow old and eventually die, like human cells. So… you will… grow old and eventually die."

"You are telling me that I am mortal now, is that it?"

"Yes. But according to the tests we've run, you have a whole life to live. Well, at our human scale." She was smiling softly. "I do not have any objection for you returning to your quarters, but you're not cleared yet for active duty. You should take some time to rest and… rest. Come down anytime if you feel still weak or… if you have questions. I am sorry to not bring you better news." Dr. Keller smiled shyly and left us.

I was looking down at my hands. These hands have learned to handle so many tools: bows, swords and guns. They have been working on logs, rocks and devices. They have touched the bark of so many trees, in different forests and on different planets. They have touched the face of so different people, men and elves. John's hands came closing on them. When I turned to him, I saw sadness and distress in his eyes. He was looking at me painfully but silently. Sometimes, the unspoken words are heavier in meaning than the ones you can utter and what he did not say warmed up my heart.

I freed a hand and caressed his face, smiling softly. He frowned, for he did not understand.

"I have the gift now." I told him softly.

"What are you talking about?"

"I have the gift of men. I have been given the gift of mortality. Nothing happens needlessly. I knew my path was not to follow my people. My path was here and the Valar gave me the most formidable gift: the chance to share a lifetime with you."

"But it's not fair, you were immortal…"

"And I made a choice to live among men. You are not immortal. I would have accepted any fate if it was the price to pay for sharing these years with you. I did not expect this gift. I never knew how it felt like to be subdued by time. Now I feel like I want to make most of it. It feels meaningful now. Each turn of season will be a new season of my life and this is a treasure." I smiled again tenderly.

"Okay… I uh, did not imagine you would take it like this. I don't know what to say, Dëna."

"Words are nothing. Only actions can …" I did not have time to finish my sentence. John had caught me in a passionate kiss. Only actions are important. And love.

Breaking our kiss, he looked intently in my eyes. "Are you really okay?"

"I am. And I will be better once I will be out of this place." I squeezed his hand and he smiled fondly.

"Alright. I take you home."

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