-26-
-Gilbert POV-
Dear Diary,
He is crazy, he's locked me in the cold damp basement and I am chained still. STILL! Its been 2 months, but he lets me eat, drink and lets me spend my time doing what I please…which is nice…in a way. But as soon as 7pm comes along he marches his drunk ass down here and guides me like…a….jew….to this pole and locks me into it. He blind folds me and then it begins.
My body aches, and I have some sores that won't heal because they are being re-opened almost at a constant. He keeps asking me to apologize for the crap I did to his people, but I won't. He already sought out revenge on my people and the Germans as well. He is starting a war with one of the allies. Something about weapons.
All I think of is kids fighting over bigger toys they got for Christmas. But these toys are bigger and far more destructive. I have heard whispers of the horrors of Japan.
Ludwig, are you thinking of me? I am thinking of you almost constantly. Where did we go wrong? The power sure was nice wasn't it? Is it bad that I feel no shame for anything we did? We should have focused on the war, that would h…
Listen to me. I guess, this is why I am no longer around right?
Ivan said if I am good, that I can start to come to the meetings and then I would be able to see you! Maybe I will give you this diary! We could write back and forth maybe? Man I miss you. I really want to play football with you.
Ivan was angry at you one day for making a football team despite his opposition, I heard the colors were white and black. That makes me so happy!
Love
Gilbert of Prussia.
p.s Still do that don't I?
-normal POV-
In Germany things were tense. The borders were laxing only a little for the time being, but the East vs West Berlin thing was driving him mad.
"Why can't I even see him? Its been 3 years?"
"I don't know Ludwig, if I did I would tell you." The American sighed.
"Would you?" Ludwig shook his head in anger, his hand went to his temples. " Forgive my tone of-
"Its fine Ludwig. We all understand." Alfred smiled.
"Alfred?" It was a question but it was almost stated.
Alfred looked up " Can I visit Auschwitz?"
Alfred swallowed heavy " You want to visit it?"
"Poland." He paused " he made it into a museum." He closed his eyes " I just, I just want to see what you guys see."
"You still don't understand?" Alfred asked in disbelief, his eyebrows furrowed.
"No." Ludwig spoke " My people are disgusted and act as though they never knew. That in its own drives me to stay awake at night."
Alfred didn't speak, he only listened at the table drinking coffee.
"When the war ended. You asked me, was it really necessary? Do you remember?" Ludwig asked leaning forward.
"I do," He sighed " I do." He nodded.
"I can explain it now. If you like." Ludwig spoke quietly.
"I think I am going to need a beer for this heavy talk."Alfred spoke breathing in.
"Can it be German?"Ludwig almost pleaded.
"YES!" Alfred applauded as Ludwig got up and took a frosted glass bottle from the fridge.
When Ludwig came back he asked " Please just listen to me. Don't freak out?"
"I will try my best."Alfred said in a worried tone.
Ludwig breathed in deep and began " After World war I, my people were angry they rebelled against the treaty of Versailles. They hated that Francis could just blame the whole war on us when really it was Roderich who started the war." He rolled his eyes " But most of all, we were put to such extremes with debt that we couldn't even afford a loaf of bread." Ludwig gritted his teeth " My people, they were starving on the streets, they were dying and people would run to there dying bodies for clothing and money!" He formed tears in his eyes " It was awful, and one population didn't feel it at all." He gripped his fist and his eyes narrowed " The Jews. They walked around in warm fur coats while children were crying to there mothers for food. Brutality and rape was up and murders were rampant. But no one did anything. The people who had money kept their money." Ludwig sipped his beer. " So…we lashed out."
"Lashed out." Alfred laughed widening his eyes.
"Hitler lead the way with passion and promise. I am not going to say I agreed with the demise of the whole Jewish population. But do you understand the feeling of a whole country moved by one way of thinking?" He asked.
"I am afraid I do. Which is why we were divided in my country for a long time." Alfred spoke and Ludwig listened. " The union abolished Slavery, because it was wrong. I understand now, why you were so angry. But you took your anger too far." Alfred spoke softly.
"I know I did." Ludwig sighed " I was living my days in the camps day by day, I tortured and killed people every day in those camps, I would go home and literally not think of anything I was doing through out the day." He shuddered. " I followed Hitler. I wanted." He felt tears fall down his face " I wanted Germany to be everybody's home." He lowered his head " But now, I have made it a place where people just think of us as murderers and rapist." He gripped his hands tightly.
"We don't think of you that way." Alfred corrected. " We think your war torn, and we are not holding anything against you. Sure, what you did was horrible. But was it any more horrible then what we have done?" He motioned with his hands.
" Let me see the camp." Ludwig pressed.
"Alright." Alfred said before a long pause.
"Can you make sure, Gilbert is ok too please."
"I can try."
-next week at a conference-
"This concludes this meeting." Arthur spoke in a tired voice.
"No it doesn't." Alfred spoke.
Ivan smiled and sat back down.
" We need to talk about Gilbert."
Ludwig looked up in surprise, it was as if his breathing was on pause. He held it waiting for an answer.
"Is that really needed right now Alfred?" Arthur asked.
"It is." Roderich spoke.
"I agree." Francis nodded.
Spain looked up " He is kind of important to me. I haven't heard anything about him in three years"
"Ivan?" Alfred asked.
"He is fine. I am treating him with-
"I vouch to go see him." Switzerland spoke up.
Ludwig listened carefully as all the countries agreed and or disagreed. Finally Ivan began to get angry. "I SAID HE IS FINE!"
"It doesn't matter how much you say it. We want to see proof!"
For a moment Ludwig felt a glimmer of hope but this glimmer was quickly destroyed. It was strange how the smallest words and actions could bring up the satisfaction inside ones heart. But at the same time a few words could destroy this hope as well. Ludwig didn't speak, he felt that if he did then something might come out that he really didn't want to. Things that were supposed to be things he regretted but when it came down to it the one thing that he didn't regret was the einsatzgruppen. He would never regret this, this was something that had to be done to have a future in the world. It seemed he was correct, if only they had succeeded.
"I have had it with you thinking you can control the world Alfred."
Arthur snickered " You think he controls the world?" Arthur rolled his eyes " Oh please, if he did that I think we all would notice."
Alfred rolled his eyes subtly and rebound " Ivan this isn't about ruling the world or anything like that, this is just about his brother. This doesn't even have to be a weapon against you."
"Who brought up weapons?" Ivan grinned which made Alfred obviously nervous.
"Can I speak?" Ludwig finally asked.
"Sure." Alfred nodded which received a glare from Arthur.
"I know we were enemies only five years ago. But please I beg of-
"Your pleas go unheard in my opinion." Ivan growled.
"THIS ISN'T ABOUT THE PAST OR ME AT ALL!" Ludwig screamed across the table. Francis breathed deep trying to keep his composure. Poland was the one who looked the most scared. The Nordic countries seemed unaffected and the only one that was showing any sign of surprise was Denmark whom was laughing. There was a flicker of fear in Ivan's demeanor, which made Ludwig smile " I swear to you, if Gilbert isn't ok, I will-
"I cannot toy with a limp body."
In a flash of anger Ludwig leapt across the table towards the other nation. Alfred and Arthur quickly were about to grab him when Denmark rose to his feet and unlatched his ax.
"I think we need to take a breather." He spoke thick in accent.
This made Arthur sit down immediately but Alfred kept hold of Ludwig, who glared at Ivan with the eyes of a murderer.
"We need to calm down Ludwig."
Ivan rose to his feet and smiled "This is proof that if we were not occupying his country that he would be the same still."
"I WOULD NOT!" Ludwig growled.
"Oh please."
"Ivan this is the last time I will say this we n-
"Fine. I will bring him next time."
"Two weeks?"
"Correct." Ivan smiled " What are the terms?"
"What do you mean?"
"Do you expect anything of him?"
"No." Arthur spat.
"For now. No." Alfred spoke as if he were the director of the meeting.
The rest of the meeting went smoother and when it ended Ivan and Ludwig glared daggers. Once Ivan left Arthur turned to Ludwig " If you ever do this again I will have to put my foot down on your behavior is this understood?"
"Please don't talk to me like a child." Ludwig asked in a defeated tone " I just don't care anymore."
"L-ludwig." Alfred smiled a bit warmer. " Don't lose hope."
"I can't help but-
"Oi!" A loud voice spoke up. Arthur turned back and in his stance it tensed. He breathed in heavy and left the room. Mattius moved forth towards the two nations that were left. " Yank, can I talk to him?"
"Sure." Alfred smiled and followed after Arthur.
Ludwig looked at the tall country and looked down at the ground. " Yes?"
"I just wanted to talk." Mattius laughed.
"Talk huh? You probably hate me after what I did?"
"Nah," A tone Ludwig hadn't heard from the nation emerged from his throat and this made Ludwig a lot more comfortable. " I don't really care truthfully. I actually think it's a crock of shit that you are being blamed for all of this."
"I took part in it, so what ever." Ludwig shrugged.
"Do you regret it?"
"The question of the century." He chuckled.
"Well?"
"I don't regret it. If I regretted it, that would make me a complete coward." Ludwig looked up " I truthfully just hate that what I did has destroyed all that Gilbert has worked for."
"About three months from the war. Gilbert gave me something to give to you. He said to me ""if this crazy war ended bad, he wanted me to give it to you." Mattius smiled " He was always good to me you know that?"
Ludwig gritted his teeth " Don't speak of him like he is dead."
Mattius's eyes lowered and his eyebrows moved with his somber eyes. " Can I tell you something?" Ludwig didn't answer before Mattius continued " I have never told anyone this, so please…just keep it between you an me." He took a seat next to the German nation. " Nice day eh?"
"I guess?" Ludwig asked in confusion
"Yeah maybe its not that great…" He chuckled " When Sweden and Finland left me…I fought for them so hard to come back to me…they rebelled so passionately." He smiled continuing the story.
"" It was a cold winter day and the snow fell so perfectly. Berwald left his dear Finland alone and came to fight me alone in the night. We fought with so much vigor. He wouldn't give up and I wouldn't give in until finally I said he could just come home, I wouldn't punish him, I would just welcome him and he said to me dead in the face-
" I will never go home! I want to be FREE!"
He knocked me out…and didn't kill me…when I woke up, the snow had stopped overnight and all I could see was the bright white sky and for a moment it looked as though it was raining. Or so it seemed, my eyes fell shut and I cried…I cried for a long, long time in that single spot on the ground surrounded by my own blood. I didn't want to lose him, any of them for that matter. But slowly each and everyone of them did leave me. "'
Tears formed in the corners of his eyes " But Ludwig, after a while the tension loosened and now I can talk to them. We have dinner together often and spend time together and for the most part, it seems that we have some sort of dysfunctional family." He smiled " What I am trying to say is….it sucks being alone, but things do get better, ok?"
Ludwig looked at the proud nation and smiled "Thank you."
"Oh yes." He reached into his pocket and pulled out a white envelope. " Here." Mattius handed the thin slip to the other nation. " Best regards?" with that the nation left him to be by himself.
Ludwig unfolded the letter
" Ludwig,
So you got this letter? Guess that's not so great, but at the same time…it means your ok. That's really all that matters to me. I know you never saw this outcome…but I did. I always did, well not always. Just around 1942. But you know what, I love you. So what ever, it happens you know? Things get to our head and we cannot stop. Just please…please don't you dare do anything to lower your countries status. You stand strong like the country I know you are. You stand tall and strong for your people and they might hate you tomorrow but they will love you after a while. Just know I love you my dearest brother.
Love
Gilbert of Prussia"
Ludwig read the letter and brought his hand to his eyes and couldn't help the tears that fell from the corners of his eyes down his face.
-2 weeks later-
Ludwig woke up and made his usual large breakfast which included many jellies and butters, vegetables and plenty of potatoes and Sausage. Coffee was brewed to Alfred's liking and when Ludwig finally situated himself at the table he was asked.
"Are you excited for today's meeting Ludwig?" He chuckled.
"A little, can you tell?"
"Just a little." Alfred admitted.
"I hope I will be able to talk to him for a little."
Alfred smiled " I don't see why you couldn't. You don't really make the judgments of your country anyway. So maybe I will ask for you two just leave for a while and come back when its over."
"That would make me very happy." Ludwig smiled.
Hours passed and when the meeting started Ivan was not seen. Ludwig looked at the clock restlessly and then at Arthur and Alfred. Finally the sound of chains were heard, Ivan came through the door way and left the door opened for Gilbert. Gilbert had a blackened eye and his hair was tousled only a bit, his body looked tired but he held his head high.
"What's up West!"
"Gilbert!" Ludwig smiled.
Ivan looked over at Gilbert who was smiling big and in a pained expression Gilbert bit his lip and looked down. Ivan took his seat and Gilbert took his next to him. Ludwig looked at his brother with eyes of worry. Throughout the meeting Gilbert would glance up to see Ludwig and Ludwig never missed a glance. He always smiled if only a little. Gilbert fiddled with the hand cuffs for a little when finally Arthur scolded him.
"Will you be quiet?"
Gilbert opened his mouth to answer when his hands lowered to his lap. Arthur's eyes widened at the lack of argument. Arthur's eyes softened and he spoke again " Back to the meeting."
"Before we continue. I think it is only fair to release the news of one of my projects in my country."
Gilbert looked up from concentrating on the circles he was drawing on the table. He didn't look to interested, Ivan smiled and continued.
"I am going to be building a home for the Soviets, a piece of architecture that will be going to replace the Konigsberg Castle."
The minute the words came out of Ivan's mouth Gilbert cried out gripping his side, he yelled out in agony. He cried out and all the nations looked in extreme shock of the display.
"We need to rush him to the hospital!" China shouted.
"Gilbert!" Ludwig stood up.
Ivan continued unfazed " The castle will be demolished finally in a couple years and the working site will begin."
Gilbert breathed heavy in raspy breaths, his eyes were filled with tears " Not the castle…gods no…not-
"Gilbert is showcasing the effects of taking over a country and destroying parts of it purposefully." Austria spoke up. " This is a classic case of how it looks"
" Lets get him to a doctor!" Ludwig shouted.
"No doctor can help him" Roderich gritted his teeth ashamed at the site, he took off his glasses. "Ivan knew this is what would happen, thus is the reason he announced it."
"This is crime against the united nations in its own!" Ludwig yelled.
No voices raised up to agree with him, he waited for the support when no one helped. Kiku bit his lip and gripped his arm. Feliciano spoke up " G-germany, maybe you should sit down."
He looked at Gilbert " Is no one going to stand up against this?"
Ivan cocked an eyebrow " Sit down Ludwig?" He smiled.
Ludwig looked back at Ivan and glared and was about to open his mouth when Gilbert growled in a weak voice.
"Don't talk to him like he is trash." He growled.
Ivan glared down at Gilbert and smiled and looked back up at the table of nations " any way its an important project any donations are welcomed." No one spoke up. " or not."
"Any who vouch for Ludwig to take Gilbert to seek medical attention while the meeting continues?" Alfred directed. Most agreed and Ivan was over ruled.
" Remove the shackles until the meeting is done." Arthur ordered.
Ivan rolled his eyes and did so. Ludwig quickly rose to his feet and moved around the table to help Gilbert. He wrapped his arm around him and helped him out of the room. The two were silent until they were at a bench by a window.
"Gilbert, are you ok?"
"This?" He laughed " This hurts pretty bad Ludwig." He nodded trying to hide the pain with a smile. "Maybe I am just stupid to think" He bit his lip " To think he would leave my countries idol standing." Gilbert began to sob.
Switzerland approached the two with a box labeled red cross. The blonde smiled warmly " Hello boys, Gilbert its been a while."
"Neutral as always?" Gilbert spoke weakly smiling.
"You know the answer." He smiled.
"So it seems the Eternal Neutral is the same." He began to laugh and cringed at the pain in his side.
"Please remove your top and let me bandage you up."
Gilbert looked up and bit his lip " I think I will be fine." Gilbert spoke half ass.
"Take it off. What's the matter its not like you should be shy now. You used to run around naked with Spain and France!"
Gilbert nodded, his flesh tone went from lively to ghostly pale. He began to unbutton each one slowly and opened up the shirt. He took one arm out one at a time when he heard Ludwig's gasp. Switzerland seemed unsurprised, he was in fact the medic for many holocaust and war crime victims.
"Now please lift your arms up as high as you can only for a couple minutes. Can you do this?"
Gilbert lifted his arms and laughed it off " Don't worry West, its not that bad." Gilbert looked at Switzerland in the eyes and pleaded silently for him to make up something to help him convince his brother. He caught onto the notion.
"Gilbert is right, for the most part there is only bruising and some cuts that need some time to heal. Nothing life threatening." He looked up for approval and Gilbert nodded.
"See?"
"Gilbert maybe we can help you-
"There is no helping me west, I mind as well…be…dead." He sighed.
Ludwig raised his voice " Don't say that! You will be free soon, this is only for a little."
Switzerland was about to have him lower his arms when Ivan's voice was heard " Enough. Its time to go."
"I am not finished." Switzerland spoke out bluntly.
"It doesn't matter if you are finished or-
"You will wait until I am finished is this understood?" He reached for his gun when Ivan chuckled.
"It will not matter if you bandage my snow bunny."
"S-snow bunny?" Ludwig growled.
"White hair,pale skin and red eyes. He is a little rabbit?" Ivan smirked.
Ludwig gritted his teeth and Gilbert broke the ice. " Its ok, I feel fine. I actually wanted to give something to you!" Gilbert grinned and reached for his jacket.
"What is this?" Ivan growled.
"Its my diary I wanted to give it to him."
"Fine I will allow it."
Alfred came from around the corner to see Ivan connecting the hand cuffs. Ludwig looked up and spoke to his brother once more " Gilbert, I love you." He spoke proudly to his brother. Gilbert was about to respond, his eyes softened. Ivan approached him blocking his vision. Gilbert turned around and walked away.
"G-gilbert?" Ludwig whispered and looked down at the diary.
Alfred walked over to Switzerland who was packing up his medical supplies.
"How bad is it?"
"Its very bad, his body is suffering from major internal damage. He also has many contusions and lacerations all over him. His throat was heavily bruised up and it looks as though he has been choked a lot. The internal bleeding is the worse."
"Will it heal?"
"Its all up to Gilbert truthfully. If he has a fighting spirit left he will fight it and keep going."
"There isn't much I can do then." Alfred sighed.
"Sadly…no."
Alfred looked down the hallway to see Ivan walking with Gilbert in front of him. He looked back at Ludwig and smiled warmly.
A/N : So strange that I haven't been writing for a while. I am trying to wait for my beta, hopefully she will get caught up soon. :)