AN: Well, first things first – I'm very surprised at the number of people who only read HEA stories. I'm kind of stunned. I mean, I knew it was a preference but I didn't realise how much it was a requirement for so many people.
Personally, I've never hated or discontinued a story because the ending wasn't a happy ending. In fact some of my favourites are not HEA. I'm also not the kind of person to assume the story will have a happy ending. Where's the fun in that? I like to worry and fret over what will happen next otherwise all the challenges the characters face is just meaningless fluff in the middle to fill up space. For me anyway. I might as well skip over it because it always works out at the end anyway, right?
I know a lot of you would have liked a warning but I don't always plan out my stories from the very beginning but rather I get a feel for it then decide as I go where I think the story heads to. Sorry, but that's how I do it. I respect that many of you only read HEA and don't hold it against you one bit. It's all about preference. In future, maybe I'll try to give warnings as soon as possible. I just feel it kills the anticipation in reading.
Lastly, I do not appreciate people accusing me of "ruining" the story just because things don't go the way you want them to. It's rude and it's insulting. I appreciate my readers very much. I'm obviously a lazy writer and I don't always check my stories properly before I update but you've stuck with me regardless and I'm grateful for that. But I am not forcing anyone to read my stories and I'm not going to change my ideas just because you don't like them. That's not how writing works. I write what I want, you either like it or you don't. Simple. I wouldn't dare tell an author what to do with their story, ever. Serenity1006, feel free to stop reading at any time. I don't owe you HEAs or anything else, for that matter. You are not paying me to do this.
Besides all that, if this is your last time reading an update, thanks for sticking around so long and it's been a pleasure writing for you. Thank you for (politely) letting me know how you feel and I respect your preferences. And thanks for all the reviews so far. Enjoy.
JPOV
I often forget how young Bella is, and maybe that's a good thing sometimes. She's more mature than most girls her age but every now and then she'll do something or say something that reminds me that she's essentially just a kid. I know she wasn't very excited about going home, with all the trouble going on with her parents and I know she doesn't really have anyone to talk to over there so I call her as often as I can and we talk for hours and hours, however long she needs me for. The fact that it affects her so much makes me remember.
But I think about her all the time and soon I find that I'm missing her. Especially when I'm sitting on my own, not doing anything in particular. Randomly, she pops into my head one day while I'm watching a game with Billy and Paul who holler and yell at the screen every two seconds. The coffee table is decorated with snacks and beer that I haven't touched while Paul scoffs everything down in entire fistfuls. He's an animal, screaming with his mouth full like that. The game can't be that good can it? Whatever. I don't really have in me to really pay attention, and I get this intense feeling that I really need to see Bella.
"Dude, are you even watching this?" Paul asks, annoyed that I'm not paying attention to his ramblings about the players. He hates being ignored, the impatient motherfucker. I don't care, though. "What the hell is up with you this week?"
I don't answer him but I get up and head to my old bedroom in the small house, which Sara and Billy haven't touched since I was a teenager. I've taken to keeping it tidier than I used to when I was in high school. Can't say I was the neatest kid back then.
I've offered to buy my parents a new house in the city but they love this tiny red house on the res with its three bedrooms and close proximity to the beach. They will probably live the rest of their lives out here.
I shut the door behind me and call Bella's number.
"Hello?" she answers, sounding distracted.
"Bella?"
"Hey!" She greets when she realises it's me.
"What are you up to?" I ask.
"Jurassic Park," she says chuckling and I have to laugh too. This might be the third or fourth time I've called in the middle of Jurassic Park. She apparently has no issues watching it days in a row.
"Again?"
"Forever," she declares. "It's the best movie."
I really want to see her.
"So is that your plan for New Year? Jurassic Park?" She tells me that there's one thing she might go to but doesn't want to so I tell her that I want to come down and see her. "Is that okay?" She seems really excited, which is a relief. I thought for a second she might not be able to. I add that I'd like her to stay overnight, maybe a few days but she says she can make it happen. I let her text me where I can pick her up and tell her I'll be there in the afternoon tomorrow.
The moment we get off the phone, I start preparing, packing my bags filling up the car. I have to leave soon if I'll make it. I let my parents know I'll be leaving for a bit to visit a "friend," which I can tell Billy doesn't buy but he keeps his mouth shut in front of mom. Only when we're alone in the kitchen a few minutes later does he slyly bring it up again.
"A friend, huh?" he asks in his gruff old man voice. His face is leathered and his beard could do with a trim but I know he likes how it looks. It hides the grin on his face but I can see it in the way his eyes scrunch up at the ends. "What's her name?"
"Oh, jeez, Billy. Are we really going to do this? I'm not in high school, you know." I'm a little defensive and make a mental note to tone it down a little while I pack a few energy drinks into a cooler bag for the road. I zip it up and place it on the kitchen counter.
"Well," he says, laughing quietly at my reaction, "if you're not ready to bring her home yet, we can wait. In the meantime, I won't say a word to your mother." He winks and nudges me with his elbow before he walks off with his old man's gait. I'll need to get him to check his leg out next time I'm home.
"When will you be back?" My mother asks as I pack the car with my luggage and some stuff that might not be stocked in the house: extra blankets, a flashlight, stuff like that. I like to be prepared.
"A few days," I say, shutting the trunk. "Probably before the end of the week."
She nods, still looking slightly concerned. Mom does this every time I leave to go somewhere, no matter for how long, no matter who I go with. It's cute and annoying, watching her worry like that. She's so tiny, maybe 5'1, her pitch black hair with peppered with random streaks of grey is almost as long as she is. I can see right on top of her head and she hardly reaches my shoulders .She chews on the nail of the thumb and looks up at me with huge eyes as if she's willing me to stay. I feel bad but I always tell myself that I'm not leaving her alone. She has my father and my sisters will be home for the rest of the holiday. They might not be at home right this second but they're around. Also, if I gave into her every time she made this face, I would literally never go anywhere. Maybe it's because I'm her youngest or because I'm the only son. She never acts like this with the twins.
Once I've gotten everything in the car I give her hug and a kiss on the forehead, leaving behind a frown line. "I'll be fine, mom. Just like I always am."
She nods, not listening to me in the least. "Drive safely and pull over when you get tired. But don't stop in the middle of the nowhere, it's dangerous," she rambles as I get in and start the car. I have to roll down the window to hear her entire "be safe" ritual, which includes reminding me to wash behind my ears and not to stay up too late when I get there. I wave her goodbye as I pull onto the road and she waves back all the way until she becomes a tiny little speck in the rear view mirror.
I drive an entire twelve hours and stop at a hotel in Nevada to sleep and eat. First thing the next morning I'm off driving the next ten hours. I was sceptical about picking her up at her home at first but then decide she knew better than anyone when her parents would be a round. Plus, I have no idea how much she packed and wouldn't want her walking around with a heavy suitcase. So her house it is. I call her when I the GPS tells me I'm a few streets away and the next minute I'm pulling up in her drive way. She looks like she coming from the house next door. Her ass looks amazing in the jeans she has on and I groan as she bends over to pick up her bags.
I get out of the car and wrap my arms around her, not wanting to wait much longer to holder her, and kiss her cheek softly. "Hey, pretty girl. You ready to go?"
"Yeah, I'm ready," she grins and I take her bags from her, placing them in the back. As soon as I'm back in the car I drive off. There's still about an hour and a half of driving left and I want to get it over with. We talk about Christmas and I'm glad to hear that she and her parents are getting along.
"I told you," I say, remembering when I told her it wouldn't be so bad. I pull into a gas station to fill up again for the last leg of this trip.
"You drove down here? I thought you flew." Bella gapes at me in surprise. I suppose I could have flown in but really, I wasn't up for it. At the time, I thought driving would be better. Next time I know better than to listen to myself. I'm exhausted. "I should drive the rest of the way," Bella suggests suddenly. "Give you a break."
"You don't have to do that," I say but she rolls her eyes, telling me that she wants to.
"Let me drive, please." She stretches out the 'please' while batting her eyelashes at me and I can't help but laugh. This girl is wonderfully weird. I decided to let her drive.
After we've filled up, Bella takes her place in the driver's seat while I relax as her passenger while she turns up the radio to sing along to all the songs she knows. As she drives sings, she does a little wiggling in her seat that I think might be dancing and I do my best not to laugh. She looks so happy, stealing glances my way as she smiles and belts out song lyrics and drums on the steering wheel. The parts she doesn't know she hums enthusiastically. I'm surprised that she knows almost all the songs that come, regardless of how long ago they came out. I'm even more surprised when a song I'm pretty sure is Justin Beiber comes on and she keeps on singing every word, dancing more with her hips and shoulders. I can tell she really enjoys the song because her smile widens as she gets to the chorus.
"Is it too late now to say sorry? Cause I'm missing more than just your body," And she bops her side to side to the sudden beat. "Is it too late now to say sorry? Yeah I kno-oh-oh that I let you down! Is it too late to say sorry now?" She bobs her head some more, this time with her hips moving with as she sings the chorus wholeheartedly.
"I didn't take you for a Justin Beiber kind of girl," I laugh, enjoying watching her have so much fun.
She jabs her tongue out at me, "Laugh all you want, this is a bomb ass song, okay. Now don't disturb me mid-song."
I leave her be and just watch her as sings song after song until she's had enough and turns the radio down. We pull up to the house and I watch as Bella gawks out the window in amazement. "Do you like it?" I ask even though she obviously does.
"It's beautiful," she says before jumping out of the car. I let her admire the house and as I unload our bags from the car. She follows me in, holding the groceries but ends up putting them in the kitchen when she sees the pool.
"Shut up!" she gasps, walking over to the glass doors. "If that's an infinity pool I'm seriously going to lose my mind right now, I kid you not?"
"Yeah it is," I say, more than happy that she like it here. I'm a little proud of myself right now. I wait for to rip her eyes away from the pool and have her follow me upstairs into the main bedroom, where I set everything down. She immediately heads over to the where two glass doors lead out to a balcony. She stands there, right by the bed, looking like the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. The sun hits her hair just right, bringing out the reddish tinge in it.
This is when I forget that she's kid, despite how excited she was a minute ago. She just stands there in awe of the view before her and I just have to appreciate how grown up she is in this moment when she can just watch the sky slowly turn orange.
I can't be away from her very much longer and move to wrap her in my arms. "I'm glad you like it. I'll take that kiss now."
She turns, smiling up at me with a dimple on her left cheek. She links her fingers behind my neck and I hold her close, feeling her small frame push against my body. "Aren't you tired from all that driving?" Her smirk is playful and teasing. "Maybe you should rest. I think you should rest for a while."
I squeeze her behind, "I can rest later. I want you now."
"Right now?" she groans with fake annoyance but ends up snickering.
"Right this second."
"I can live with that," she says, pulling my face to hers and sighing into my mouth. I dip my tongue in her mouth wanting to have her right up against the wall. Everything about her is so maddeningly soft: her skin, her lips, her hair, her smell . . . Everything, her body, is so fucking soft and ironically, my dick stiffens in my jeans at just the feel of her. I hadn't been with anyone for a while when we first started seeing each other and damn if she just doesn't make me want more and more every time. I could handle it before but after having her, I don't know how I would go on without her for too long.
"You smell so good," she breathes. Even her breath is soft on my skin.
With hand, I start on the buttons of her jeans, which start up higher that I'd realised. Soon I see that just one hand will take way too long and start working double time. But it's like the buttons never end. What the fuck ever happened to a single button and zipper. "Jesus," I groan in frustration, tugging harder at the jeans "how many buttons do you need? Why so many?"
She laughs, leaning her head back a little. "They're high-waist. That's how they work."
Fucking stupid high-waist jeans. Her ass look amazing in them but I don't think this works for me. Finally, I get the last button, grinning at my work. "Well, I hate them," I tell her, tugging the jeans the rest of the way down her legs as she throws her sweater, her brunette hair falling in long waves over her pale shoulders.
But Jesus, holy shit is she not wearing these red as sin panties that are so lacy that there's hardly any material covering her skin. My dick twitches painfully as I stare at the way they hug the curve of her ass and give some colour to her skin. Fucking hell.
She notices my stare and instead of blushing like she usually would, she does a little spin, swaying her hips with each turn. "Do you like them?" She asks innocently, like I'm not about to burst right out of these jeans.
"You are so beautiful," I tell her and almost immediately she goes flush in the cheeks and on her chest. "Especially when you blush like that. Come here."
I snap her bra loose and let it fall at our feet. Her breasts are the most perfect mounds of skin I've ever seen and when I tell her that she grabs them in her palms, each a little more than her hand can hold, and she jiggles them. She fucking jiggles them. I miss whatever it she says because I swear she's trying to kill me here. But she smiles up at me, all big brown eyes and pink lips. She definitely is going to be the death of me, that's for damn sure.
She tugs at my clothes, pulling my t-shirt over my head dropping it to the floor and I quickly grab her around the waist in an effort to get a taste of her rosy pink nipples. Her head falls back and she juts her chest out at me and stands on her toes, giving me better reach as I dart my tongue out and take a lick of the nub until it raises and hardens and her breathing is heavy. When I'm satisfied, I take the other nipple in my mouth and give it the same treatment while I slowly dip my fingers into those god sent panties, feeling how hot and wet she is. I rub her clit slowly, listening to her gasp and whimper. She's so wet that my two fingers slip inside easily while I hold her tight, alternating from one nipple to the other, back and forth until they're pointing right at me. I watch her face as my fingers work, her eyes closed and her lips parted. She bites her bottom lip forcefully when I curl them towards me, trying to keep herself quiet, probably out of habit. She looks so amazing like this I want to push her right up against the wall but it'll have to wait for another time. Right now, I just want her to get off.
So I get to my knees, placing a kiss on her flat stomach and peeling her panties off as I part her thighs, licking right along the top of her slit, effectively cutting off whatever she's in the middle of saying. I'm about to ask if she doesn't want me to go on but her hips jolt forward. Into my face and I take that to mean she likes it. I bring her knee over my shoulder so that I can get to all of her and drag my tongue from her opening all the way up and swirl my tongue around her clit then repeat. She tastes like skin and salt and slightly of soap. She grabs a fistful of hair and tries to hold on tight to my shoulder.
I push my fingers back in, curling them again and again as deep as they can go. She squirms and bucks her hips and cries out quiet little sobs and it's so damn sexy. Her hand moves through my hair roughly, like she's trying to massage the back of my head in time with her hips.
"Jake," she moans desperately, "I'm going to fall."
I can feel her thighs trembling, but I've got her. "I'd never let you fall, Bella." I look up to watch her face crumple each time I suck hard on her, moving my fingers in and out of her. Her chest heaves with each breathe she pulls in. If I could paint a picture of her like this, mouth open and eyebrows knit together, I would. It's an unbelievable sight, I want to burn it into my memory.
She tightens around my fingers, her eyes closing and her head falling back as she pushes herself hard onto my hand, legs trembling more.
"Oh fuck," she squeaks, her hips jerking as she comes. "Fuck." Her grip on my hair stiffens as her body shudders and spasms then relaxes.
Standing, I holder up against me, making sure she doesn't stumble. "Did you like that?" I wonder against the neck of her skin and she nods. Satisfied, I manoeuvre her onto the bed and spread her knees. I pull the condom out of my back pocket and hold it between my teeth as I wrestle with my belt buckle impatiently before finally springing free.
She takes the condom from my hands before I can open it, her eyes heavy and cheeks flushed. "We're okay this time," she rasps. "We don't need it."
For a second I think about whether I should just put it on anyway but watching her, her soft body and peeked nipples and her open legs, I'm overcome by how it would feel to be inside her without a barrier. How she would feel right around me and I need to have it.
"Okay," decide and stretch over her as I push myself into her.
I know immediately that this won't last too long. Bella's so fucking hot around me, clenching around my cock in a way that clouds my thoughts. "Oh, Bella." God, nothing will ever feel better than this right here, her flesh right on mine. I pull and push back inside her, overwhelmed by how much I've missed this. How much better this feels. I twitch inside her and thrust again. "Oh god, baby, you feel so, so good."
She brings our lips together, brushing her hand over my back as I grind her into the mattress. She moves in time with me, lifting her hips up when I push mine into hers. We breathe together to the rhythm we've found and, god, I don't think I can make it much longer.
I bury my face in her neck and her legs come around my waist. "Bella. I can't . . ." I feel the twisting in my gut and tightening in my balls already and I need her to come now. But she says not to hold on for her. I would protest but I really can't hold back anymore. I move, speed up my pace, feeling the sweat on our skin as everything tightens then releases the next second. I spill inside of her, exhausted and sensitive.
I lie on top of her, holding my weight but not having the energy to roll to the side, and let my body slowly regain its strength. "God, I missed you," I breathe as she scratches the back of my neck lightly with a chuckle.
"I missed you too," she whispers and we lie like that a little, catching our breath.
"So what do you want to do on this little holiday of ours," I ask, leaning down to kiss on her neck and shoulder.
She laughs, "Definitely more of this."
I tell her whatever she wants then pull her under the covers for a nap.
I must be more tired than I thought because when I wake up again, the sun is just hiding behind the horizon leaving the sky shaded from a deep navy to a strong orange. Bella, her back curved to my chest, is reading a book with her hair tied up and the bedside lamp on. She's wearing my t-shirt.
I curve my arm around her waist and bury my face in her hair. She still uses that apple shampoo I like so much. Her skin still smells soft but now with hints of sweat and sex. She must have cleaned up, though, because where I stroke her thigh the wetness is gone.
"Did you have a good nap?" she asks, placing her book on her pillow and turning to face me. Her leg comes over my hip and her body is pressed right up against mine. She grazes the short hairs on my face with my fingers, smiling up at me.
"Mhmm," I hum, still groggy. I want to kiss her though, so I lean in and capture her lips. Her hand curls into the hair on top of my head as I sweep my tongue over her lips then pushing them open. I could go on like this forever, wanting to be inside her again but figuring that she must be hungry, so I pull myself back.
"Let's get you something to eat."
But she pulls me back to her, saying it's warm in here. "Just five more minutes."
I don't fight her. We kiss until she's flushed and her lips are swollen. Eventually, I pull on a pair of pants and follow her down stairs in the kitchen where the groceries still sit on the counter. I put the perishables away while Bella picks out ingredients to make whatever she wants.
"What are we making?"
"Burritos!" she grins, happily holding up a pack of flour tortillas. "I will cook the meat and beans, you get the rice and vegetables!" She instructs, fetching a pan from the cupboard under the sink. The next minute she scurries back upstairs and then returns with a very worn-looking ipod. The screen and casing are all scratched up and I'm amazed that it still works. I watch her set up her little speaker with it and chooses a playlist. A song I don't know fills up the kitchen and she starts singing along to it, swaying her hips and nodding her head. She catches me starring.
"It's my cooking playlist," she says shyly, her cheeks red.
I laugh, pulling her in for a kiss before I get back to what I was doing. I watch her dance and sing, realising that this is a side of her I've never gotten to see before. On the outside she seem like the quiet, shy type but the more you get to know her the more her personality shows. She laughs a lot and she loves junk food. She's very responsible even though she complains lot about having to be responsible. She doesn't let herself be pushed around but she keeps quiet when she feels there's nothing worth saying. She kind of perfect in a way I'm not sure I can put into words.
Sometimes, I think I should let her how strongly I feel for her, and I do, this isn't a game to me, but I don't want to overwhelm her by getting too serious too fast. She's told me that she's never had a boyfriend before and she'd never been physical with anybody beyond kissing and groping, which I find unbelievable. She thinks that maybe guys don't find her attractive I know for sure that that's not it. I can just imagine her oblivious to all the advances from her classmates. There's no way she was surrounded by high school boys and not a single one approached her. She probably didn't realise or maybe some of them were intimidated by her.
Yeah, she definitely doesn't have a lot of experience so telling her that I'm thinking of leaving my job at the school might be way too much for her.
Logically, I could be with her more openly if I wasn't her teacher but I have no idea how she would react. I wouldn't see her much, since I would no longer stay in the on campus staff housing. She might not even have thought about what happens after she graduates. Or maybe she doesn't think there's much to consider. Maybe she just figures that she'll graduate and we'll go our separate ways and that would be the end of it.
Maybe it's better if I don't think about it too much either.
"You done with those?"
Her voice snaps me out of my train of thought and I have to shake my head to clear it. "Huh?"
She's standing right next to me, leaning sideways over the counter so that she can catch my eye. "The vegetables. Are you done chopping or gonna add some more? I need to add them to the beef."
I look down at the counter to find I've cut up more than enough. "Oh, yeah, go ahead. This is plenty."
Smiling, she takes the chopping board and throws the vegetables into the pan with the meat. She returns, hopping on to the counter with a mixing spoon hanging out of her mouth. "Where'd you zone off to, mister?"
I shrug, not wanting to scare her with my real thoughts. "Just thinking about stuff," I say, moving to stand between her knees, running my hands up her naked thighs.
"Stuff?" she smirks with a quirked brow.
I shrug again, toying with the edge of the t-shirt, knowing she's not wearing anything underneath it. I brush my fingers just below it, sometimes slipping under the fabric. Her thighs are silky and pale and it makes me want to be back between them. "What kind of stuff?" she looks at me wickedly as she pulls her hair loose and runs her hands through the knots. It's messy but it looks so good on her. "Climate change? Inflation? Internet memes?"
I shake my head. "More like the future."
"The future?" she snorts. "You have big plans, do you?"
"Not particularly. Just thinking."
We're quiet then and I can't really tell if the silence is uncomfortable. I alternate between brushing on her thighs and tugging on the shirt. I sweep my thumb slyly under her knee where I know she's ticklish. She gasps and jerks her leg back almost kicking me in the hip. I pretend to reach for her knee again and she threatens to really kick me if I dare. So I don't. But I laugh. I go back to tugging at the t-shirt and maybe thinking of pushing it all the way up to her waist. She watches me intently, her big brown eyes scrutinising me. And then the next second, all the playfulness is gone from her face.
"Am I a part of that future?" she asks, shyly this time. When I look up, surprised, her cheeks are pink but she looks me directly in the eyes. She keeps her face expressionless, which isn't something she does often and I don't know what to think of that. Her eyes are wide and curious but she reveals nothing else. I know she's asking seriously but I don't know what she wants me to say, so I tell her, "If you want to be."
She thinks about that for a second, watching my fingers on the hem of her shirt and then says, "Do you want me to be?"
"Yes," I answer simply.
She nods but doesn't say anything, tucking her bottom lips between her teeth and playing with the ends of her hair as it hangs loosely over her shoulder. I can only watch her and not say anything either. There's only her cooking playlist in the background and maybe, if you listen hard enough, you can hear the traffic from the city below. For a minute, I think about what just happened and what it means. I can't tell what she wants and fear that maybe I've alarmed her or something.
But then she smiles just a little but not looking up. "It feels really good to hear you say that," she says quietly and I think, maybe for a second, I hear her voice tremble.
"Hey," I whisper and tilt her chin upwards, "Are you crying?" Her eyes are glistening with tears that threaten to spill over with every blink but she holds them back like a champ, biting her lip hard. "Why the tears?"
She snorts at herself, embarrassed. "I don't know, I'm just . . . I don't know."
"Don't cry," I tell her, pressing my lips to hers gently. I kiss her all over her face, brushing her hair out of the way as I go. I didn't realise that she felt this way. "Don't cry," I repeat, softer this time, then kissing her mouth again.
"Sorry," she sniffs, hiding her face in my neck.
I rub slowly up and down her back. "It's okay."
She nods but doesn't say anything else. It all happened so suddenly, I wasn't expecting to talk about it right now but I guess things just work out sometimes. It seems like she can handle it, even though she is a little overwhelmed, more so than I expected. But she's happy and that's all really that matters.
"You know I love you right?" I ask her softly.
Instead of the yes I was expecting, she starts bawling into my neck. I can feel her tears on my skin. Stunned, I rub her back more, not entirely sure what's happening. I've never seen her this emotional before. Maybe I shouldn't have been so casual about it. I know it's usually a big deal saying it out loud but I didn't think it would be that big a deal. I let her cry it out and then when her breathing slows and the sobbing stops, I push her back to get a good look at her. Her eyes are red rimmed and her cheeks are blotchy. I wipe the tears away from her cheeks with my thumb as she sniffs and bites her lip. "You okay?"
"Yeah," she nods, still looking very embarrassed. She pulls her hair away from her face. I laugh a little, still quiet stunned by what just happened. "I'm sorry," she says again and again I tell her that it's okay. "I love you too," she mumbles too quietly, peeking at me from under her lashes. I want her say it louder but maybe I shouldn't push her anymore today. Instead, I kiss her, deep this time, and I can feel her tears smearing on my face.
She pulls away quickly, wiping her face with her palms. "Agh, I'm all teary and snotty and gross," she sniffs. "I need to wash my face."
She jumps off the counter before I can tell that she isn't gross and she disappears up the stairs.
While she's gone, I gather myself and lean back against the counter. Well that went well, I guess. I'm still not entirely sure what just happened. One second we were cooking and the very next we're crying. It's kind of alarming, to be honest. By the time she gets back, I'm no closer to coming up with an answer than I was before.
"Hey," I grin at her, pulling her to me by the arm. "All good?"
"Yeah," she smiles a small smile, still embarrassed.
I kiss her again and this time she doesn't pull away. I hold her, and she rests her head on my chest. "You want to talk about what just happened?"
She shrugs. "I'm not entirely sure I know, either. I just started tearing up and I couldn't help it."
"What are you feeling right now?"
"Hunger," she says and I have to laugh. "And happiness."
"Yeah?"
"Yeah."
I nod, "That's all that matters."
We make our burritos and eat them sloppily on the floor in front of the television in the bedroom. We didn't want to ruin the carpet down stairs. By the end of it, Bella has burrito juice running down her wrist. She can't catch it all by herself so I help her lick it off her skin.
We're so full we slouch against each other and we channel surf. When Forrest Gump flashes by she insists we watch the remaining hour, so we do. She gets a little teary at the end, which I find very amusing, but manages not to spill any more tears.
We wash the dishes together then I chase her back upstairs and Bella throws herself on the bed. I crawl on top of her and kiss her silly until she can't breathe. She massages me through my pants. I groan and grind into her palm, my dick hardening pretty quickly.
"Let's take a shower," she says into my mouth.
She hurries into the bathroom to turn the water on and sticks her hand in every minute or so to check that the water is hot. When it is, she rips the t-shirt off and pulls me in with her. The water is scolding hot and I know she likes it that way so I don't change it. It stings my back but I ignore it.
Her hands twist in my hair and she really strains her legs to stretch up and brush her lips against mine. Titling her head to the side, she darts her tongue out, licking my bottom lip and then touching it to mine. I take her in eagerly, breathing her breath and feeling her skin. She pulls her hands from my neck down to my shoulder and then my chest. Her mouth follows, tasting the skin as her hand travels south. Her hand curls around my dick and it twitches in her fingers as she slowly brings them from the tip to the base. She uses her thumb to smooth circles into the underside.
And then she's on her knees smiling shyly with wide eyes as her tongue peeks out and licks the tip ever so slightly. Holy mother of Christ.
Watching for my reaction, she wraps her pink lips around the tip and sucks on it carefully. And then she slides further down, her cheeks hollowing out and I think I might be dying right here and now. "Oh, Bella. Oh fuck, that's good," I groan, loving how hot her mouth is. I brace my arm against the wall for support and clench my fist tight. This girl is going to kill me.
My blood is racing all over my body, rushing straight to one place and I can hardly contain the noises I'm making. Fuck, she's so gorgeous, her lips stretched over me as her head bobs faster and deeper the more confident she gets. But then she takes in a little too more than she can handle and gags.
"Sorry," she mumbles with embarrassment.
"It's okay," brushing her cheek. "Take your time."
She nods, using her hand while she readies herself to try again. She shifts on her knees just a little closer then starts at the tip, sucking on it gently. And then more and more and her is bobbing, more carefully and massaging the base. Her grip is a little tight and I loosen it with my own, showing her how. She pulls me out of her mouth, using her hand the way I showed and looking up at me with those huge brown eyes. "Like that?"
"Yeah, just like that," I say breathlessly and the corner of her mouth pulls up at one side in a smirk. She's so damn proud of herself. It's sexy as fuck. She watches my face with each twist and flick of her wrist to watch my response. Her hair is matted down to her scalp and her cheeks are flushed from the hot water. Shifting again, she lips and catches a few drops of water on her tongue and fuck me if she doesn't like a god damn siren right now. She's going to trap and pull me under the waves and I'll drown in this feeling she's giving me.
Enthusiastically, she takes me into her mouth again, swirling that tongue around experimentally and beaming when I praise her for it. She pretty smiles around my cock as she sucks and swirls and licks and I feel that familiar tightening in my balls. I can't help myself, I place my hand on the back of her head and push my hips forward, thrusting shallowly into her mouth. I warn her that I'm close and she pulls off just as I erupt, shooting spurt after spurt onto her chest. The water washes it away almost immediately. I lean back heavily against the shower wall as the water starts to lose its heat, regaining my breath as she grins up me.
"Was that good?" she asks eagerly, standing and wrapping her arms around my waist.
"It was amazing," I tell her, pulling her chin up to me. "And you looked amazing doing it."
"I did?" she grins wide, surprise and pride beaming on her face.
"Like a Goddess," I nod. Her grin widens.
The rest of the night she demands I call her Your Godliness as she prances around waving her hand like a princess. It makes no sense but it's amusing and hilarious and I just don't have it in me to tell her to stop. I love this crazy girl.
AN: I know that wasn't exactly romantic but I don't think Jacob and Bella are the romantic types? Well, things only get bumpier from here.