I tied our horses to the front of the coach, and they knew where to follow Sam's horse to. Frodo and I clambered into the coach, and as we rolled home, I laughed and talked with him.
Then, after a minute or two, I sighed and laid my head on his shoulder. He was changed, but I could sense that good humor that had disappeared the moment the Ringwraiths came to us. I hadn't known that Frodo for a long time. But now it was better, because now he understood the pain I'd lived with my whole life.
When we reached home, late into the evening, we raced back to the Green Dragon. I told Frodo we had to celebrate him staying in the Shire, and so we did. They sang one of their most ridiculous songs that night, Cat and the Moon. I laughed and danced with them.
When I finally teetered into the lawn later that night, Frodo invited me inside for just a moment. I still insisted on sleeping on the lawn, but could spare a minute or two. Although the night had been a merry one, the moment I entered Bag End . . . I started to sniffle.
Frodo stopped at the door before closing it. "Sev?"
I shook my head. "I . . ." I shook it harder. "I was going to lose you." I laughed and threw it off, trying to hold it all back. "You were leaving. I guess it just hit me right then, pretty hard—," I choked and collapsed onto the couch.
Frodo sat down next to me, but I didn't want him to comfort me. I just wanted to have him. I consented to have his arm around my shoulder for a few minutes, but ended up laying his head under mine. I pressed my lips lightly to the top of his head, rubbing his hair from the side opposite me. Overjoyed and shocked at having him, really having him there, I kissed his head three more times before I held it to my shoulder.
"But you stayed."
Frodo smiled and looked up. His face was so sweet, and I cupped it in my hands.
"And you also have to go to sleep now," I insisted, kissing his forehead as deeply and sweetly as I dared.
Frodo sighed, but he didn't look too upset. He released me from the house, "walking me back to the lawn." We laughed and talked about Sam and Rosie, mostly. I faltered when I wondered if . . . well, if I could ever be that for Frodo, what Rosie had been for Sam.
As I sat down on the couch, I realized Frodo made no movement toward me, or toward Bag End. I cocked my head at him, unsure what he intended by staying out here. He couldn't stay awake all night. He looked a little distant, watching me but not quite.
"Are you all right?" I asked.
He didn't seem to snap out of it, just nodded and sat down next to me. No matter how many years I spent with him, I couldn't seem to break the flutters in my pulse whenever I saw or felt him beside me.
Although I thought about kissing him rather intently that night, I only let my gaze flicker to his lips once, and I hoped he didn't notice. I didn't want to shove anything on him, even if in theory he liked it more than I did.
Frodo adjusted, turning toward me slightly. I swallowed as his hands very gently framed my face. I could feel every fingertip individually. He brought my head toward him, and he kissed my forehead ever so carefully. But every moment he stayed I could feel my consciousness dissipating; dizziness took over.
He pulled away, and I couldn't help but produce probably the silliest, most twitterpated smile I ever have in my life. "Good night, Frodo," I said. I expected him to pull away, to leave me . . . but he didn't. He just watched me.
After a small hesitation, Frodo's lips brushed mine. Our first kiss had been so desperate, so pained, that this one almost blew it away. His lips were so sweet and gentle, I allowed the kiss—while not deep—to remain for a long moment before I pulled away. He looked like he wanted to continue it, but he pushed nothing. He seemed to settle himself, and I had no doubt he had internally convinced himself more would come tomorrow. My heart thudded.
"Good night, Sev," he said.
With one final stroke to my cheek, he turned and walked back inside. I flopped onto the couch, with nothing better to say or do for it. I still felt a little dizzy.
Two birds lighted onto the fence. Both were injured, each with a broken leg. But they cared for each other. I smiled at them, wishing them all the luck in the world. They flew off then.