I do not own Hawaii Five-0 or any characters. No copyright infringement intended.

Notes: enormous thanks to Fifilla who kicked the bunny HARD - it hurt! Then Cinder joined in and whumped the bad bunny into line ... ouch. Of course, Jazzie too for the sanity check.

Chapter 26

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He dutifully stayed away for three days and then a full weekend where he devoted himself entirely to Grace. But on that Monday, Danny arrived earlier than usual. He went to his office, turned on the lights and then his laptop, yet never sat behind his desk. Instead, he took himself straight down into the interrogation room where he had to turn banks of overhead lights along the way. What bothered him first though, was the dull resounding echo of his own footsteps. His hands were sweating and he was positive that his pulse rate had doubled.

He did that privately every day while the D.A. pursued the actions necessary for Jason Matthew's retrial. He continued even after Kono rejoined the team and they all sat through her dressing down for deleting the security video files. Danny had smiled obviously and without compromise when she calmly noted their own refusal to describe what she had done or how she had conducted herself when accidentally glowed at the Matthew's home. No one had missed Chin's unconscious rubbing of his right shoulder and disgusted whisper of 'popper' under his breath.

Still for days and not for want of trying, Danny never got farther than standing in front of the closed interrogation room door. By the sixth day he was furious with himself. With a racing heart that was pounding in his ears, Danny ignored it all to open the door with his own key. The switch for the lights was on the inside wall, just around the door frame and to the right, roughly at shoulder height. Danny palmed the switch on as soon as the door opened and unable to go any further, then he simply stood there.

That became his next issue to conquer and he refused to be pleased with himself when success came only slightly faster. Just two days later, Danny stepped into the room completely and then waited for the shaking to begin or the swooning feel of vertigo. But nothing happened and he heaved in a long, settling inhaled breath of air.

Eight firm steps in had Danny standing directly in front of the room's lone chair. He couldn't fight the need to glance over his shoulder though to ensure he'd left the door completely open. When he couldn't stand it anymore, he backed out and forced his hand to slowly flick the light switch off. However, he was nauseous and his hands were not calm as he relocked the door and it took him three additional days to decide if he would ... or even could ... continue with his little game. However, something else quite unexpectedly derailed him.

The retrial had begun with its subpoenas and scheduled court dates by this time. Five-0 was busy and still making time to keep an eye on the proceedings, especially Steve due to his personal interests. He, Kono, Chin and Danny were even called in to describe, discuss and be cross-examined on those facts pertinent to the case. Slowly and very surely, headway was made in Jason's favor. But revisiting Five-0's experiences with the drug had also been personal.

Danny felt the setback strongly coming on after attending four long days in court and long after he'd been required to take the stand. He'd conducted himself well and quite professionally when describing those clues which led the team to reopen the investigation related to Jason Matthews based upon the strong ties to the larger glow drug cartel case. He explained the awkward relationship amongst the teens with the math tutor, and then focused instantly on what was discovered in Martha Walker's red diary. Each fact was corroborated by Eric Doonan, Ivy Martin, and Mike Hanson. Still hospitalized, a statement was read from Martha which was hardly necessary at that point.

On the last day though, Danny's issues sparked warningly when the District Attorney moved on to discuss what and how the drug had been identified in Jason's football gear. By default, Kono's simple, one-time exposure was a factor in the cross-examination to substantiate the fickle power of glow. After Kono admitted to not remembering the incident, Chin Ho was called to the stand. With great trepidation, Chin explained the speed of the physical changes witnessed moments after his team-mate was exposed upon retrieving the equipment from the Matthews' home.

"Popper?" The D.A. asked with a crooked smile. "She was calling you names?" Kono's eyes were wide as Chin bit his lip and glared at the man. So far, he had managed to gloss over the discussions about blue Smurfs and Menehune. However, based on Kono's stunned expression, she most certainly would rake him over the coals later that night.

"She was suffering from various hallucinations. She saw things." Chin was desperately trying to tell the truth and still avoid bringing blue Smurfs and rambunctious Menehune to life in the courtroom. The D.A. was sniffing around again and Chin grew uncomfortable as he searched for the right words. Besides, he still had no idea what she had been talking about regarding waffles and some girl named Lucy.

"Were these hallucinations dangerous, Lieutenant? Not just causing instances of mere name-calling?" The D.A. pressed on. This time, Chin sighed in relief at escaping to answer a more straight-forward question.

"Yes, they were very dangerous." Chin said. He then elaborated on the injuries sustained to his badly bruised shoulder. With an apologetic look to Kono, he followed it all up with his need to handcuff his cousin after she tried to leave the safety of a moving vehicle. His description sobered the entire courtroom as he went into some detail regarding her continued visiting apparitions and her subsequent waltz into the oncoming line of traffic on the highway. With a somewhat sly glance to Danny, he gracefully omitted her favorite Haol'e remark spoken just outside the hospital.

Danny offered Chin a skittish smile in return, but his thoughts were far away. Sitting in court, hearing his teammate's testimony regarding Kono's exposure and Charlie Fong's confirmation of the drug's contamination was having an ill affect. It flooded Danny's memory with his own dire fight and what he was perceiving now as his own recent failures in the interrogation room.

With a stunned, shuddering inhale of air, Danny realized too, that he would need to relive and recount Steve's exposure and the terrible circumstances resulting in his own attack. Steve immediately felt the tremor next to him and glanced down.

"What's the matter?" Steve whispered softly when he saw that Danny was staring at the floor with a distant look on his face. "Danny?" Steve rocked into his shoulder when he didn't move right away. Then it was as if Steve realized the same thing at the same instant; their eyes locked and Steve simply knew. Just as they were discussing Kono's exposure when picking up the football gear from the Matthew's home, they would have to do the same at least twice more with Larson and Martha Walker's pending trials.

Nervously Danny shook his head at Steve, noticeably paled and then fidgeted in a hopeless need to escape. Excusing himself, he did his best to clamber over a few people hoping he wasn't so obviously looking as if he were diving through the rear doors of the courtroom.

"Danny?" Steve's whisper was in his ear as he nearly trod on his shoes through the rear doors of the courtroom. Danny should have known that he'd not make it the few feet alone as Steve took his arm. "This way."

Danny felt as if his body was in free-fall by the time they hit the outer corridor and very thankful for the strong hand that aimed him for the men's room. The two were blissfully alone for a few desperately needed minutes while Danny virtually drowned his heated face in water from the sink.

"Two more times, Steve. For Walker and then for Larson. Two." Using the mirror, Danny looked at his partner's worried expression because things were still far from being okay. Each time something happened to unsettle him, Danny felt not only blindsided, but like he was a total failure. He dropped his eyes to stare at the white porcelain of the sink as Steve lay a soothing hand on his neck. "At least two. I need to be able to do this."

The onus would be on Danny and the rest of the team, as well. Because other than remorse, Steve couldn't remember a thing from that night.

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After the trial, Danny angrily threw himself back into his private experiment. He was good in covering his morning jaunts to the interrogation room. No one noticed his self-deprecating mood swings on the days he conducted his personal tests or so dearly felt his own failures. By the time they'd arrived, he was over the worst of his snit and buried in case work. Steve wasn't buying much of his partner's absolute dedication to being in the office. Instead, he was forced to wait for a signal he hoped he would recognize; because, Steve didn't know what to do or how to ask Danny what he needed anymore.

Many days later, after needing a break from his sojourns to regroup and gather his resolve, Danny was undeniably irritable and realizing that he truly needed help. It was admittedly easy to traipse all the way down to the interrogation room. He could do it blindfolded and not even need to pause until the door was open and the light was flicked on. Danny even made it directly to his spot in front of the chair without mishap. The steps into the room were steady and even now. But he pushed ever harder in his annoyance for more because it was all taking far too long and he sensed his time running out.

Danny began to sweat heavily as he confirmed his next necessary goals. With a warning curse to himself under his breath, many more strides had him pacing the length and then the width of the bland room. He continued walking in a haphazard pattern until his respiration had calmed and the sweat had dried on his hands. For some reason, the chair eventually pulled him back and Danny stopped to stand directly in front of its empty seat.

His rational mind urged him on and then the urge became a physical need as Danny clenched his fists so tightly that his hands turned white and he left marks in his palms. He hissed when he barked his left shin on his stumble step forward as he half-turned to sit down in the chair. It was cold, hard and extremely uncomfortable in its purposeful design. Yet still as he waited for what he thought was the inevitable, it never happened. He was far from comfortable, however there was no tremble, no hitch in his breath or fearful dimming of his vision.

Personal mission accomplished, Danny began to laugh in sheer relief. The feeling also brought a flicker of tears to his eyes because in truth, he was far from done. However, it was time to bring Steve in and ask for help.

Retracing his steps, Danny turned off the lights and locked the door. He was back at his desk moments later and nearly humming a happy tune under his breath. Danny waited until their work day had ended before asking Steve to meet him at the office early the next morning. When that next day dawned, Steve arrived to find a curious handwritten note on his desk with a very clear demand.

"Meet me in interrogation. Alone. ~ Danny"

Unable to help himself, Steve literally jogged to the smart table to pull up the live security feeds. His stomach clenched in emotion when he saw Danny sitting patiently in the chair waiting for him. Steve paused and then turned off the view on the smart table before taking the steps two and three at a time down to meet his partner.

~ to be continued ~