Because I'm in a good mood... here is another Written!

Friday 26th April 2013

I wake up momentarily thinking I'm on a boat on a rough sea. There's a churning in the lower pit of my stomach but when I push myself to sitting I remember I'm in my home in London.

My hand flies to my mouth as I realise this feeling is intense nausea and I rush over to the bathroom just in time for my stomach to completely tense and for the vomit to ensue.

I feel a hand on my back and a hand pull my hair back and I realise that my husband has come to my aide. He rubs tiny circles on my back as I cling to the toilet expelling its contents.

"Ok?" Christian asks as I sit back against the tile wall.

"No…" I groan, the nausea is just as intense but I know that I'm going to throw up again.

"I'm going to wet a cloth just hold tight baby." He says kissing my head as I wipe my mouth across my mouth.

I hear him running water and it's enough to have me on my knees again with my head down the porcelain he comes back and I feel the cold wet flannel on the back of my neck as I expel more of my stomach contents.

"There, there baby." He says as I slump back against him. He presses the cold flannel to my head.

"Ok now?" He asks and I just whimper. "Do you want to get up?"

"No." I reply scared of moving in case I'm sick again.

"Ok." He replies quietly as he folds the flannel and wipes it across my mouth as I whimper like a wounded dog. "Shh, there baby." He says just before I'm pushing out of his hold to vomit some more.

Fuck I feel like the living dead but other than nausea I can't feel anything else wrong with me at all. Christian continues holding my hair back as I just dry heave horribly.

"I'm done." I say knocking the flush and sitting back against his head.

"You sure?" He asks and I nod, I'm really done I just know that I am.

"Ok let's get you up and back to bed." He says helping me to my feet.

Once he has me tucked up in bed he calls his mother not caring about the time difference. I try to protest, as my stomach settles I feel fine but Mr protective will not let me move, glaring at me every time I try to sit up.

"Talk to my Mom." He says handing me the phone before he takes the flannel off my head and heading for the bathroom.

"Hello Grace." I say tiredly, I just want to go and have some breakfast and fill my empty stomach.

"Ana darling are you ok?"

"I'm fine now, I woke up just nauseous."

"Any other symptoms?" She asks.

"Like what?"

"Stomach cramps, a temperature? Or problems with passing stool?"

"No I feel fine Grace, I had a nightmare that's all and woke up feeling like I was on a boat." I say chuckling, it's not quite a lie my dream was slowly becoming a nightmare though I think the nausea woke me before the worst of it.

"Could you be pregnant?"

"No, I'm on birth control Grace." I say sounding like an annoyed child.

"So you were last time, it couldn't harm running a home test until you get back to Seattle Ana and we'll see you on Sunday ok?"

"Sure thing Grace. Sorry he called you and disturbed you."

"It's fine. See you soon Ana."

"Bye Grace." I hang up just as Christian comes into the room with a glass of water in his hand for me.

"Well?"

"Your mother thinks I could be pregnant." I say making him freeze.

"Do you?"

"No." I say quickly but then my mind goes back to the past week or so. My going off tea, exhaustion which I put down to a hectic schedule, my nausea… "I guess I could be."

"Really?" His eyes widen and I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing.

"Yeah I mean… I'm on the pill and have been taking it religiously since India's been born but anything can happen right."

"Right." He says still not showing any emotion. "I'll get Taylor to get a test then."

"No!" I say quickly and he cocks his head to one side in confusion. "I don't want anyone to know Christian, what if I'm not he'll tell Gail about the test and someone could overhear."

"Ok baby, I'll go but we need to know. You just rest." He says kissing my head and that's the end of my protest.

It takes him thirty minutes to change head out and come back with a bag full of different pregnancy test kits. I giggle as he explains he didn't know which one to get and we decide we'll just do one for now.

In the bathroom I pee on the clearblue digital test and then return to the bedroom to wait the allotted three minutes. Christian paces the bedroom running his hands through his hair while I just watch the timer.

When it rings I gulp and look at my husband and he takes a deep breath before picking it up.

"Well?" I ask and he looks at me, his eyes wide.

"According to this… you're pregnant again."

"What?" I snatch the stick from his hand and look at it, according to this I am one to two weeks pregnant. "It could be wrong."

"It could also be right." He says and I can't get a read on his emotion, it's scaring me.

"Do you want another child?" I ask him as I hold the stick in my hand.

"I want a whole brood with you Ana." He says and I smile a little. "I'm just a little shocked, India's not even a year old yet."

"I know." I reply looking at the digital screen of the stick again.

"Do you want more children?" He asks and I sigh weakly.

"I love India." I say looking at him. "You and her are my entire world and yes I want more children with you, more of our children but it's a bit soon. I'm about to sign with SyCo and you've got so much big business things going on right now. I don't think it could have come at a worse time." I say and he smiles and holds around me tight.

"Well someone in the world decided that this was the right time Ana and I guess we're going to make the best of it. Think how amazing it will be when he or she is here, a sibling for India another child for us to love and give a good life to."

"It will be amazing wont it?" I smile and he kisses the top of my head.

"Yes it will be." He laughs. "Now why don't you go have a long hot bath and leave everything to me, I'll sort out everything with Simon Cowell as you need to rest so we can fly home tonight." He says and for once I'm more than willing to relinquish everything to him, I need this news to settle in because I can't say I'm happy about being pregnant again, I can't say I'm sad either because I do want more children but I wanted our next child to be planned, I wanted us to both be ready and I'm not ready, my whole career is just starting up and now I'm pregnant and for the next nine months I'm going to have over-protective Christian once again and I don't know how the hell I'm going to handle it all.

"Christian." I say looking at my husband as I make a really quick and impulsive decision.

"What baby?"

"I don't want to sign with SyCo."

"What? Why?"

"I'm pregnant Christian. I'm going to be a Mom again and I feel guilty enough sometimes that I don't spend enough time with India, especially when I was touring. Maybe this is the sign I needed to see that a singing career is not for me."

"No Ana, you were amazing last night, yes I'm still reeling from your outfit and the sex appeal but Ana I think you found your calling, business was mine, singing is yours…" He kneels down in front of me.

"I can't Christian. If I sign with SyCo and Sony it will be a hectic schedule, more travelling than ever before, deadlines, I can't do it. I don't want to do it."

"Then my decision is made too. I'm not selling Grey Records."

"What? Why?"

"Because you were born to be on stage Ana, your acting career failed before it began…" I snort remembering the email we kind of ignored from New York stating that they weren't calling me back for a second audition. "…Singing is what you should do for the rest of your life. If I don't sell Grey Records you can work your way, I'll get a team together to run it so I won't be directly handling it and then you can work with Lila and Tito on your album and make a success of your singing career at the same time working to your own speed, to your own schedule. You can do both, be a Mom and a singer."

"You really want me to do this." I say wiping the tears from my eyes.

"I haven't been this sure since I asked you to marry me." He says before kissing my forehead. "If in a few months time you decide you don't want to sing and go back to business or books then you can do that but me keeping Grey Records allows you to finish you album and do what you want with your career, it leaves doors open for you."

"Thank you."

"I made vows Ana to uphold your dreams and I will do whatever I have to do to keep to them." He smiles. "now get some rest."