Pepperoni Story: Imagine 10 bridesmaids with one similar dress problem: headlights. One solution being pasties, but with the material of the dress being so thin, one girl yells, "Oh my god! You have pepperoni nipples!" Laughter. The end.

Rossy lifts his arm and smells his armpit. Emma grunts and wrinkles her nose and the baby cries. I guess no one likes his armpits.

"I stink. Gonna shower. Be nice, Em," Rossy says as he backs out of the room. I don't know what to do, so I sit on a bar stool at the little island. Emma looks over at me, and I give her my best smile because she's Rossy's sister, and I really want to her to like me.

She shakes her head. "You're not like any of the other girls he's brought home."

The metal is cold on my bum, so I'm shifting around a lot, but I don't want Emma to see because I don't want her to think she's a bad hostess. "Does he have a lot of students?"

She stops and looks at me. "If that's what you want to call them then…yes, he does."

"Well, I think his lessons are fun. I've never done anything like them." I giggle.

Another look. "I imagine you wouldn't have."

The baby starts crying and it just about breaks my heart. "Aw! Do you want me to hold it?"

Emma laughs. "He's hungry. If I do, he'll try to feed and with you being…like this…he'll succeed."

I laugh this time and look down at my womanly slopes. "Silly! I don't have any milk!"

Emma laughs again and this time it feels like a real laugh and it sounds nice. "He won't know that."

I shrug, and this time when Emma looks at me, her eyes are nice. I like nice eyes. "You hungry?" she asks. "We have Lucky Charms."

"Oh! I love Lucky Charms! The rainbows are my favorite marshmallows ever."

"Somehow I knew you'd say that." She smiles as she puts a bowl in front of me. "So tell me, Baby. How did a girl like you end up with a guy like Ross?"

"I don't know. He was nice to me. I don't have very many friends."

Her smile kind of wilts but her eyes are still nice. "None?"

"Alice was my only friend, but she's not very nice this year, and yesterday she was really mean to me. That's when Rossy found me."

"Well, I'm sorry about that. High school sucks." She laughs again but this time it isn't nice at all. It's more bitter and then she looks down at her baby.

"Is he yours?"

"Yeah. I'm the cliché. Small town girl. Sixteen and pregnant. Father unknown. I should have my own reality TV series."

I giggle because I think she's trying to be funny but I don't understand. "I only watch cartoons on TV."

Emma sighs and pours Lucky Charms into my bowl and then some milk. "I like you, Baby…I love my brother and he is a good guy and I'm sure he's helping you out in the best way he knows how, but he's a boy and all boys only have one thing on mind. Pussy."

"I like kitties too!"

"No, Baby. Not that kind of pussy. I'm talking about vaginas."

"…oh."

"You know what, Baby. I think we should hang out more. You and me? Let's be friends."

I smile, eyes wide. "Sure! I love new friends! Mom is having guests over for lunch today. Do you and Ross and he-baby want to come to?"

Emma thinks about it for a second before, "Sure. Why not?"