Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.
Songs is: When You're Gone by Avril Lavigne.
Chapter Twenty-One – Separation
Surprisingly enough Naruto was able to break the code. No one had noticed that one of the numbers was in fact a letter. Jiraiya had a habit of writing that specific letter like a nine, and Naruto had learned the hard way when he'd been reading something one day after becoming a Genin and had asked Sakura what a certain word was because he'd never seen that letter before. Turns out that's how you're really supposed to write it. After they'd figured that out it had taken on a whole new meaning. Unfortunately for Kakashi he was the only one with a copy of Jiraiya's only book that had that letter in the title. Naruto forced him to do the reading figuring it was someone else's turn to be humiliated. He was blushing and looked a little sick by the time they were done. The message said "The real one's not among them." Naruto summoned the toad who'd been the bearer of this message to see if he could explain it.
"Jiraiya-boy was fighting six men, all of them with orange hair and strange piercings all over their bodies. They all bore the Rinnegan. He knew he was not going to make it and he used the last of his chakra to write this on my back before he released the summons and was finally defeated. He died well, boy," Fukasaku said. He was looking directly at Naruto now. "He thought of you often. Talked about you too. You were his godson you know," he concluded. Naruto was stunned. He hadn't known that, he'd just always felt close to him. He forced back the tears that were threatening to spill over and took calming breaths. Sasuke squeezed his hand inconspicuously. He squeezed it back. "And now I must pass on another message from Jiraiya-boy. One of his greatest wishes was for you to come train on Mount Myoboku with me to learn the ways of the sage. With the possibility of a greater threat on the horizon I believe it would be wise to do so at once."
Naruto felt Sasuke's death grip on his hand and it took all of his will power not to return it. "Would I have to go alone?" he asked calmly.
"Yes. The training does not work if you have distractions. Jiraiya-boy did the training on his own despite wanting to be with Lady Tsunade and outdo Orochimaru. You do not have to partake in this training, but it seems the best choice right now. I'll give you a day to think about it. Expect me back tomorrow around dinner time." And with that he disappeared. Naruto could feel the tension in the room. Tsunade was staring at him worriedly, Kakashi looked very somber and Kabuto was clearly torn. Gaara and Neji looked sad; they knew him well enough to know that he was about to get very lonely again. Hinata was looking at him as though the world had ended; he knew she must be thinking about how it would feel to be away from Kiba for any length of time without knowing when she'd see him again. Again Sai was the only one that spoke and for once his voice was hoarse.
"I'm sorry, but right now I have an overwhelming need to go see Suigetsu." He left quickly.
"Yeah, um, I need to go talk to Iruka," Kakashi mumbled and left as well.
"Kiba," Hinata muttered before taking off herself. Gaara and Neji walked into Naruto's office for a little more privacy before clinging to each other. Well this was depressing. Kabuto and Tsunade were still staring at him.
"Um, Sasuke and I are going to go mope for a little while. I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight guys," Naruto mumbled before dragging Sasuke to his apartment. The entire way there he refused to look at him. He knew what he had to do and he knew that Sasuke had figured it out as well. This really sucked. When they got to his place he pulled the grumpy raven into a deep kiss. "I'm sorry."
Sasuke sighed. "I'm not angry Naruto. I just don't know what I'm going to do without you here."
"Probably go on some missions. With things starting to settle back down it will be time to start going on missions again, and you know our team is one of the best."
"What will we be able to do without you? It's supposed to be a four man cell."
"Sai will probably take my place. We've known each other for a while and he's trained at the Anbu level. I'm sure he'll greatly help the team."
"You're trained at Anbu level," Sasuke pointed out. He was silent for a moment. "You know I always wanted to be Anbu, but after Itachi turned against the village I figured I'd have my work cut out for me, so I just dropped it. What would you think if I decided to take it up now that Itachi is back?"
Naruto's heart clenched. "I can't say that the thought doesn't scare me. You would be in considerably more danger. But," he sighed at the admission, "I know you would make a good Anbu. So I say go for it."
Sasuke kissed him reassuringly. "Perhaps that's what I'll do while you're gone," he said slowly. Naruto nodded and pulled him to his bed after pushing play on his CD player. The music wrapped around them as they held each other. For once neither of them sang, they didn't have the heart for it at the moment. They just listened to the lyrics crash around them while they wallowed in their own little world of despair. Naruto had no idea when he would see Sasuke again after he left. That thought was daunting. Gakarui came and curled up on his hair, but he barely even noticed. Sasuke was holding him just as tightly as he was clinging to the raven. He knew he couldn't like this any more than he did.
"I'm such an idiot," Naruto muttered angrily. Sasuke raised a brow at him. "I ruined our last night together by losing my mind and making you screw me silly. Now I can't do anything and I really, really want to."
Sasuke laughed a little. "We don't have to have sex in order to cherish each other. All we need to do tonight is exactly what we're doing right now. Don't beat yourself up so much." Naruto sighed and snuggled as close as he could possibly get. He didn't want to leave him. He fell asleep and dreamed that he had somehow been able to become one with the man in his arms so that they would never have to be separated again.
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Sasuke felt like a girl. He was currently lying in Naruto's bed and listening to Avril Lavigne. It was official. His masculinity had gone straight out the window. And what was worse was that he was singing it too. "I always needed time on my own. I never thought I'd need you there when I cry. And the days feel like years when I'm alone. And the bed where you lie is made up on your side. When you walk away I count the steps that you take. Do you see how much I need you right now? When you're gone, the pieces of my heart are missing you. When you're gone, the face I came to know is missing too. When you're gone, the words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay. I miss you. I've never felt this way before. Everything that I do reminds me of you. And the clothes you left they lie on the floor. And they smell just like you, I love the things that you do. When you walk away I count the steps that you take. Do you see how much I need you right now? When you're gone, the pieces of my heart are missing you. When you're gone, the face I came to know is missing too. When you're gone, the words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay. I miss you. We were made for each other. Out here forever. I know we were, yeah. All I ever wanted was for you to know, everything I'd do I'd give my heart and soul. I can hardly breathe I need to feel you here with me, yeah. When you're gone, the pieces of my heart are missing you. When you're gone, the face I came to know is missing too. When you're gone, the words I need to hear to always get me through the day and make it okay. I miss you." Yep, officially a girl.
He rolled onto his stomach and buried his face in the pillow. It smelled like Naruto. He groaned. It had been three days since Naruto had left and he was going nuts. He missed him to the point that it was painful. He was having trouble sleeping without the blond by his side. He really wanted to make Naruto come back. They'd spent most of the day together after they'd woken up, but Naruto had headed to Tsunade's office around five that afternoon. Sasuke had insisted on going with him of course, but he hadn't been prepared for the empty feeling that came over him the second Naruto disappeared. He'd looked at Tsunade in surprise as the feeling spread through him and she'd just given him a sympathetic look. He'd wandered around for a few hours before going back to Naruto's place to take care of Gakarui. The kitten seemed to miss Naruto too. He kept meowing that night. The next morning, after getting almost no sleep, he'd gone home to spend some time with Itachi. Itachi had agreed to train him to become Anbu, but the rest of their visit had been weird. Karin was there and she'd insisted on bringing Juugo and Suigetsu, who had insisted on bringing Sai. The house was fairly crowded and Itachi was extremely attentive to the redhead. Sasuke felt like an outcast in his own house. He'd slept at Naruto's house again that night. This would be his fourth night without Naruto. He'd found that he'd taken to snuggling with the little white fur ball in Naruto's absence.
He was slowly going insane. He'd never realized just how lonely it was without the blond there to light up the world. Others seemed affected by his departure as well. He'd sought out Hinata yesterday. Admittedly he would have gone to Gaara and Neji first, but they'd left out the morning after Naruto had left. Hinata was with Kiba, but it looked like Kiba had been trying to cheer her up before he'd arrived. She was really sad that the blond was gone and thinking about how little time they'd been able to spend together before their separation made it all the worse for her. She'd been so happy that Naruto's dream had finally come true and now it seemed as though it was being postponed. She didn't like that one bit. She even felt guilty about being able to be with Kiba while her best friend was separated from his love. Instead of the comforting company he'd sought he'd been the one doing the consoling and he'd split as quickly as he could. Kiba had smiled apologetically at him as he practically ran away. He'd sought out Shikamaru next, but the brunet had been busy. He'd even tried Tsunade; no dice. So here he was, alone and wishing he could just sleep until Naruto got back. He would start his training tomorrow and he sincerely hoped that it would wear him out enough to allow him to sleep. He found himself wondering for the hundredth time what Naruto was doing as the sun sank behind the mountains. He felt the strange sensation that someone was holding him and found his eyes drooping closed. Unconsciously he returned the embrace and drifted off to sleep.
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Naruto's training was difficult to say the least. The fact that he had to resort to eating bugs for the second time in his life did not make him a happy camper. Jiraiya had forced him to do so when he'd been in survival training and it had easily been the worst part. That hadn't changed. He was having trouble getting the hang of drawing in nature energy because he was partially concentrating on how bad he missed Sasuke. He really hoped he wasn't having any problems while he wasn't there. Was he training right now? He'd been here for three days and he'd hardly slept a wink. It was starting to take its toll. His concentration was suffering considerably. How had he ever managed to be away from Sasuke before? It was almost unbearable! Fukasaku was becoming impatient with him. He sighed and set Sasuke aside. He'd learned how to compartmentalize at an early age and he needed to do that now before he lost his mind. Mentally tucking an image of Sasuke into a drawer and locking it, he took a deep breath and focused on the task at hand. Surprisingly it only took him another half hour to master the process. He was easily able to pick up the statue he'd been directed to. Maybe this wasn't so bad.
Next came balance. He groaned. He'd never been very good at balancing because he just wasn't well balanced mentally. He was slightly unstable because of Kyuubi. Lately he'd been gaining more control over the fox though and he planned to take advantage of that. Unfortunately Kyuubi must not have agreed because he didn't manage to balance that board on those spikes for longer than ten minutes at a time the entire day. And more slugs for dinner. He went to bed feeling exhausted and unsatisfied. For what seemed like the thousandth time he wondered what his raven was doing right now. He closed his eyes and imagined that he was securely wrapped in Sasuke's arms, holding him tightly in return. It wasn't long before he drifted off to sleep.