I own nothing but the OC Ella! ALL HAIL THE GODS OF MARVEL! I make no money from doing this, but I have no life… this is my fun :o) This is also where I incorporate a little bit of M.A.O.S. into the story :o)

Enjoy!

Chapter 26 Goodbyes and New Beginnings

Ella sat at the table finishing the letters she was writing to the friends that she was leaving behind. She knew it seemed cowardly, but in the end she knew this would be better for everyone. She had already called Stark and talked to him, but the rest she feared she would not be able to make it through actual conversations with them, especially Banner and Phil. She read over the letter she had written to Banner and then sealed it in the envelope, addressed it laid it with the rest.

Ella wasn't sure if or when she would ever return, but she understood now that she truly didn't belong here. It had been obvious since her childhood, but now she fully understood. It was a very painful understanding; before she only had Phil in her life, SHEILD was her family. Now there were others to consider as well, people that she was lucky to call friends. Even though she had the family that she had longed for all her life, it was clear to her that her being here was not only going to hurt her, but those she loved.

While she was sure that those she was leaving behind would understand her decision even if it took them time to do so, in the end they would realize she was doing what she needed to do and hopefully remember her with fondness and know that she never meant to hurt anyone.

She pulled another piece of paper closer to her, it was time to get this one over with she sighed to herself and began to write.

Phil,

You can probably guess by now that I have decided to return to Asgard. This was in no way an easy decision for me, but I finally know where I belong. Of all the people that I have to leave behind, leaving you will be the hardest for me. For the past fifteen years, you have been my best friend, my partner in crime and when I needed it, my conscience. There are no words that could possibly ever thank you for everything you have done for me both as a part of SHEILD and as a friend. I have to tell you that this whole thing would have been a lot easier if you had just stayed dead! (You better know me well enough to know that I wrote that because I'm crying.) Please know that not a day will go by when I am not thinking of you, but I think we both know why I had to go. There are some things I need you to do for me now that I won't be around. First of all… I want you to be happy, find love where ever you can and then treat her the way you have always treated me. A wise and wonderful man once told me that there were some things that he had figured out since his death… First, life is too short; never let any moment get away from you. Make the most of each and every one. Second, never miss the chance to tell someone how you feel about them because before you know it, your chance has ended and someone else's has begun. Third, always speak from the heart. It's when you think about things too long that they get all messed up, say what your heart tells you too and get on with your life. Continue to live by these three rules, Coulson. And never forget what a wonderful man you are, or that I will always love you. I am sorry things could not have been different for us, I could never be what you wanted me to be, but I love you just the same, I always have and a part of me will always belong to you. I'll miss you.

Love,

Ella

She wiped the tears away and slipped the folded letter into the envelop. The others she, would be mailing, this one she knew she would be leaving right here, on the table for him to find. Ella got up from the table and put the key for the house next to the letter. She closed her eyes for a second, taking a deep breath, trying to commit the house and everything that had happened here in the weeks since her return, to memory.

Loki wrapped his arms around her from behind, pulling her against him. "You can return any time you wish," he said. "This is not good bye forever my love, just a parting for now."

"I know," Ella replied wiping the tears from her eyes again. "It just feels so final."

"Nothing is final."

_/_

Phil sat at the table, in the kitchen of the house, reading and rereading the letter Ella had left for him. It was not the first time he had wanted to kick his own ass for not telling her years ago how he felt about her. He was willing to take her into his life and care for her and the child if she wanted to stay with him. Now she was gone, returned to Asgard to be with the man that stabbed him in the heart. He felt that ache again in his chest.

He shook his head, his anger getting the better of him. He almost shred the letter she wrote to him, but he refrained, getting his emotions under control. The letter was all he had left of her. The only proof he really had that proved she was real, and that at least in some way she loved him.

He went to the living room, staring out the large picture window behind the couch, the lake bright and shining in the sunlight. It did nothing to brighten his mood. There would be no one that would take her place; no one would ever live up to Ella, at least not in his eyes.

With all that he had discovered in the past few weeks about himself, about his death and about Ella, he was hoping to come here for closure. He came here today to tell her that he didn't care about what happened in Asgard, he loved her and would do whatever it took to earn her love in return, no matter how much time she needed, he would be there with her every step of the way, just to be with her.

She didn't return his calls; no one answered her cell or the house phone. So he had driven all night to get here, only to arrive this morning and find the letter. He looked down at the paper still clutched in his hand. She even used his own words against him. Telling him to find love and always be true to himself. If had just allowed himself to do that before she left for Asgard, she would be here with him in this house right now, but he had chickened out just as she was leaving, even after his own death, he figured there would be time to tell her what he felt. He had been mistaken.

He folded the letter and placed it in his jacket pocket, close to his heart. He would see her again; she would have to come back eventually, until that day the letter would always remain with him.

"AC?" Phil turned around in the living room that now seemed strange and desolate to him.

"Skye, what are you doing here?" He asked, not at all happy to see her. This means she had followed him.

"Well after everything that happened…" she paused looking at him for a minute. "I was sort of worried when you took off like that."

"Unfinished business," he said turning and once again looking out the window.

"Is this where she lives?" Skye asked, looking around the large living room. "Wicked place by the way. This is beautiful."

It took him a fraction of a second to process the words she had just spoken. "What are you talking about?" He asked finally turning away from the view.

"There has got to be a woman behind all this." Skye said, putting her hands in the back pockets of her jeans as she moved toward him. "No man just up and leaves the way you did after … another near death experience and begging for death. Not unless he has a woman to get back to. So, this is where you went when you left May in charge awhile back," she looked around at the house again, whistling softly. "She must be really something."

He shook his head, not needing or wanting her company right now. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"You do too know what I'm talking about," She said, cornering him by the sofa. "I know all about Ella. I have mad hacker skills, don't ever forget it. I know quite a lot about her, and I know that at least in some way you love her."

"She's gone now." He didn't know exactly why he had said it, but it come unbidden from his lips.

"And?" Skye asked, moving a little closer to him. "Now, your life is over? After everything you've been through, you're just going to curl up and die?"

"You wouldn't understand." He tried to move around her but she wouldn't yield.

"Your right, I don't understand. You have a second chance at life, and because this one woman is gone, you're just going to shut down." She sneered at him with disdain. "You're absolutely right, I don't understand. There is so much left to live for, and there will be others, I can assure you Phil, you're not gross or deformed or perverted at least not that I know of," she smiled and pushed him with her finger.

He didn't smile or move as she touched him.

"Wow, you were in deep with her huh?"

"Skye, can you just leave… please," Phil finally walked around her to the couch and took a seat, trying his best to ignore her.

"No way AC. Not now, not ever." She sat beside him on the couch, "You need to deal with this. And then move on."

"Easier said than done," Phil said, looking at her out of the corner of his eye.

"Not really," She stood up again and looked down at him. She held out her hand. "Get off your ass and lets go do something fun, and weird and totally unexpected."

"I'm not in the mood," he said simply trying very hard to ignore her outstretched hand

"I wasn't talking about sex," She said, trying to get a rise out of him. "Although that would be fun, a little weird and totally unexpected. But no, I was thinking about going for a nice long hike. Helps to clear your head."

Phil looked up at her suddenly when she mentioned sex, a laugh almost escaping from him, not sure if he should be horrified or amused. He didn't move though, just continued to sit there and look at her.

"All right then," Skye leaned down and grabbed his hand. "Let's go AC. You definitely need to get out of this house. And don't think that I didn't see that almost smile." She pulled him to his feet, grabbed the house key off the table as she dragged him through the house and out the front door.

Once outside, she stopped and looked at the two vehicles sitting in the driveway. "I say we move the hiking gear from the SUV and put it into Lola. Then you let me drive." She said, nudging him in the side with her elbow, and waggling her eyebrows at him.

"I'd say that there would be a better chance of sex." He took his sunglasses out of his jacket pocket and put them on, then went to the red convertible and opened the driver's door, sliding into the plush white leather seat. "Are you coming?" He asked, watching her still standing on the front steps of the house.

Skye had been struck dumb by his comment, but when he spoke, she quickly regained her bearings and jumped from the steps, grabbing the packs out of the back of the SUV and depositing them in the backseat of the convertible. "You're going to hike in that?" She asked, nodding to his suit.

Phil was feeling better; his perspective was becoming brighter now that he was out of the house and away from the memories that were too painful to deal with at this point. Maybe Skye was right, he needed to get out and do something fun, make some new memories. "You would be amazed at what I can do in this suit." He put the car in gear and kicked up a spray of stones and gravel as he peeled out of the long driveway, and left the house with all of the memories behind… for now.

_/_

A/N: Another short chapter for me, but I am trying to get back to the good stuff… action, adventure and some more Ella and Loki :o) Just an FYI, I will be skipping ahead in time from here… months, I need Ella to have the baby so I can get to the next plot twist… Plot bunnies are at it again! It hit me last night while watching the Avengers… again… so, I have to write it! I did decide to incorporate a little more of Marvels Agents Of SHIELD in this part of the story as well. I felt awful leaving Phil hanging with Ella's departure and after this past week's episode, I had to run with it a little bit… and Skye just kills me, she reminds me a lot of Ella in so many ways! As always, I hope you enjoy reading and please, please, please, leave me a review… It's what I live for.

Thanks for reading!

J~