Hey.

Supernatural is back! Wahey, although i have to wait to watch it on the interweb tommorow, it is still back!

So here is a chapter..

Right, I'm gonna be mega busy for a while so not sure when i can update again, but in the meantime check out my other stories.

Love gives, Love takes is my first and fave story i've written so, check it out

And apologies in advance if i get any facts about drug recovery wrong, i have done research so thats been my limit. As i said before i've had no experiance...which i guess is kind of a good thing XD

Enjoy xx

Good day!

Sam stepped back from the victimized door he had been pounding for the last hour, his threats and offensive words had died off about 30 minutes in and as the effects of the cocaine fully wore of it took its toll. He became exhausted, ill and depressed. A depression that over whelmed him once he began to realize the situation he was in. No matter how hard he tried he wouldn't be able to take another hit, he was gonna feel like this his whole life now. No, he wouldn't. He couldn't. He needed it, more than air. He couldn't stop fighting for it. He couldn't live with out it, what was even the point of living if he was going to feel like this for the rest of his life?

"Dean!" Sam shouted again "Dean.." He said his voice softer as he slid down the other side of the door.

"Sammy?!" Dean asked, Sam heard shifting of his brother getting up in concern. "Sammy you okay? Are you hurt?"

"It hurts all over" Sam whimpered, cradling himself with his arms. "Just need a bit more Dean..Just for tonight...please"

"I can't..Sam,I'm sorry. I know it's hard to believe now but Dad and I are only doing this because we care"

"If you cared you wouldn't be putting me through this!" Sam said, venom back in his voice"Just give me it Dean! Just a little bit more. Just one hit!"

"Sam-"

"Please Dean...Make the pain go away" He begged "Dean..Help me Dean...It hurts"

"Sam!" Came John Winchesters voice suddenly "Shut up right now or-"

"Dad!" Sam began again "Please Dad it hurts. Help me. Please-"

"Sam, I know it hurts but trust me-"

"Dad..Dean...Please" Sam begged again, his voice beginning to become thick as he began to register the burning within his muscles. "Just one more hit and I swear thats it, just-"

"No Sam."

"But I need it!" Sam suddenly screamed, ignoring the spinning sensation as he got to his feet and began hitting the door "Just give me the damn drug!!"

"Just ignore him" Came John Winchesters voice "Dean? You hear me, I said-"

"Yeah I heard you" Dean sighed, his voice, rough with tiredness and thick with pain.

.................................

A week of Sam under room arrest had past, and his body and state of mind were in the worst possible condition.

All he could think about, all he screamed about was his next hit. The hunger, the addiction swallowed his pure existence. An excruciating venom spread within him. Polluting his blood, burning his muscles and torturing his brain. Although the week without the drug had cleared Sams mind slightly, meaning he was now willing to blame the drug for his sore, severe side effect rather than blaming the loss of the drug for his torment. But Sam, still only wanted more. Willing to give life and limb for just on hit. Anything to feel the intoxicating, exhilarating sensation that filled him. The light headedness, the feeling of immortality and invincibility. A release from reality and the horrors it held. Pain, crime, depression, war, hate, racism, violence and death. Death. As Sam pulled his shaking form in closer, drawing his knees up to his chest as he sat in his familiar position against the door, he let tears run down his cheeks as he thought, in soft memory, of Billy.

.........................................................

Dean sighed as he slid back down the door again, the beer he had just retrieved in one hand. He let his head lean back against the door as he closed his tired eyes and took a deep sigh, making the most of the silence. Dean had imagined listening to horrible things before, nails down a chalkboard, sand paper rubbing together, or the high pitched noise of feedback from an amp, but nothing was worse that to hear his younger brother, his Sammy, screaming in pain. Shouting insults and threats. Pleading, so convincingly that Dean had to hold onto the carpet with white knuckles to stop himself breaking in. Dean would often fall asleep at the door, where his father would have to practically bargain with him to swap shifts, letting Dean grab a couple of hours in his own bed. But, it wasn't long before he'd be back, demanding to guard the door again.

"Hey Dean" Came John Winchesters voice as he observed his oldest son. He was beginning to look more like his old man more and more lately. Bags under the eyes, stubble on the chin and the habit of running a rough hand down a weary, tired face.

"Hey Dad" Dean looked up.

"I thought you could do with some coffee" John held up two polystyrene cups and then sat down next to Dean and handed one to him.

"Thanks" Dean said gruffly, rolling away his now empty beer bottle and began sipping the efficient caffeine liquid.

"How's he been?" John looked up to see Dean, but he just stared forwards at the wall opposite him.

"Alright..Quieter."

"Guess thats a good sign"

"Sure" Dean said again, lack of enthusiasm slipping into his words.

"He sleeping?"

"I think so. I dunno." Dean said, white knuckling the carpet again to stop him from checking on his little brother.

"Look..I've been thinking-"

"What?" Dean asked, instantly alert.

"I can't just stay at home and do nothing anymore."

"Meaning?"

"I wanna catch the son of a bitch who did this to my boy"

"What? Dad-" Dean asked, of course he had been expecting this, it was the Winchester way, but Sam needed them now.

"No Dean. I've made up my mind-"

"We have to be here for Sam-"

"You're here for Sam!" John said, envy dripping off his tongue "All I do is stand around, watching you look out for Sam, watching you guard the door and watching you calm him down. Now, I know your dealing with this better than I would, hell, I would raise the roof and for that, I'm proud of you Son. But, I can't just sit here and do nothing anymore. So, the one thing I can do, the only thing I can do, is get that bastard, hunt him down and kill him myself."

"Don't you think I want that too?" Dean asked, facing his father "I wanna give that stupid ass everything he deserves and more, but its not like we can just-"

"Not we"

"What?"

"You have to stay here and look after Sam. I'm gonna go after the dealer. Alone."

"The hell you are! My baby brother nearly died because of that bastard!"

"I know you want to hunt him down too-"

"Understatement!"

"But, you have to stay here and look after Sam."

"Come on, Dad-"

"Sorry Dean. But if you want that bastard dead, then this is the only way we can do it" John said finally, looking at Dean who was now fiddling with a dirty tuft of carpet and circling it round his finger.

"Fine" Dean sighed, giving in. The responsibility of Sam outweighing his need for revenge. Unlike John Winchester, who lived for vengeance.

"Good choice" John took another sip of his coffee "Son, any idea who this waste of space is?"

"No idea" Dean sighed.

"Well, I know some one who will" Dean opened his mouth to speak, but John shouted too soon "Sam!"

"Dad! What are you doing?! You can't-"

"What?!" Sams voice was venomous, he was definitely not choosing to try and get on their good side today.

"Sam, I'm gonna ask you something and I want you to answer it right away and tell me the truth"

"Why should I?!" Came back a strained voice.

"Sam, who has been selling you this stuff?"

"Dad, come on-" Dean tried, knowing that his dad was being out of order.

"The easter bunny" Sam said with a sense of dark humor.

"Sam!" John barked back, not used to being answered back in such a manner.

"Dad!" Dean shouted "For gods sakes!"

"Hey, if you have a better way of getting the answer, then how 'bout you try"

"Fine." Dean said coldly, tension growing between the two men. "Sammy?"

"Dean?" Sams voice was softer, he had grown used to the company of his big brother.

"Yeah Sammy it's me."

"Dean, every thing's hurting again!" Sam moaned.

"I know kiddo, just give it time. I promise the pain will stop soon."

"Dean, I thought you said-" John started

"Sam?" Dean interrupted his father "I don't suppose you could tell me who gave you this stuff?"

"Why?" Sam asked, his rude tone back.

"For...For.." Dean fort against the idea of lying, but that son of a bitch needed to get what was coming to him, or who knew how many more teenagers lives would be ruined. "For just in case"

"Just in case of what?" Sams voice had perked up and John and Dean heard him standing up. "Just in case of what, Dean?"

"For just...For just in case Sam, Okay?"

"His name's Tray" Sams voice was eager again, he had obviously took on board Deans lie without a second thought "He usually hangs out at the Pitz and sometimes out side our school and he's in a band called Grey-scale rainbow. You can get one bag for 10 dollars and-"

"Okay Sam" Dean spoke over "Can you tell us what he looks like? It'll be er..easier to find him that way"

"Oh Sorry" This was the most polite and talkative Sam had been since they had brought him home. It made this unrealistic version of their life seem that more messed up than it already was. "Tall, long brown hair, tattoos on his arms and.. Oh! And he has lip and eye brow piercing" His spoke rapidly, excitement rushing through him as the words 'just in case' revolved in his head. "Oh and ask for two bags! Sometimes he gives deal. Oh and say it's for Sam winchester because he may-"

"Sam!" Dean barked, not able to take in any more of Sams excited longing voice, that he knew he would lead to disappointment "Thank you. Now..try and get some sleep"

"But Dean-"

"Sam"

"Fine" He said in a huff, which nearly made Dean smile as it reminded him so much of his original Sam, the one that was in there somewhere, but the smile didn't fully make it. He knew the reason Sam was in a huff was because he was going to have to wait for his false fix, and he knew that when Sam found out, it was going to be mayhem.

Cheer me up from all my horrible homework, coursework, revisions and exams.

Drop by a review, they do make me smile XD