Still Rated M.
Disclaimer: S. Meyer owns all Twi-related stuff.
When we last left the Whitlocks:
After a few minutes of deafening silence, I asked," And what do you want, Darlin'? I've told you what I want, I've shown you; now it's your turn. What do ya want, Bella?" And I prayed like hell to whoever was listenin' that she answered with -
"You. I want you, Jasper."
Hot damn. Looks like I got my fuckin' date after all.
Chapter 26: A Night of Firsts
My celebration was short-lived as I felt the anger and hatred still swirlin' around outside from the vampires who couldn't help but listen as they tried their best to give us some privacy; combined with my own fury's rapid return, it threatened to overwhelm me. I knew that I wasn't going to make it until tonight, and I needed to unload some of this heavy emotional baggage before I accidentally hurt someone - or just became an ass of epic proportions.
"Isabella, I'm gonna go hunt and get ready for our date. I'll pick you up here at this door at seven." I turned to walk away, but stopped in my tracks as her curiosity poked at me. "Got a question, Darlin'? Now's the time to speak up."
"Um…yeah. What are we going to do?" She asked shyly, much closer to the Bella I remembered than the one I'd come to know. I guess we really hadn't gotten around to discussin' that part; the answer was easy enough.
"That's a surprise." I felt her nervousness spike but I didn't elaborate. I'd been lookin' forward to this for a month and I wanted it to be perfect. Plus, I was enjoyin' the chance to surprise a woman with something other than the size of my dick and the sharpness of my teeth.
"What do I need to wear?" She asked tentatively, and though one track of my mind took the express directly to Guttersville, population: my huge throbbin' cock and his two buddies, the rest of me remembered that this was out of her comfort zone and I answered quickly, before the visions of a blissfully naked Bella dancin' through my head corrupted what was left of my chivalry.
"Anything you want." And with that I ran out to find somethin' to work some of this frustration, this anger, out on and maybe a bit to drink. True to his word, Peter was waitin' at the tree line for me. The only sounds as we collided and tumbled further into the forest were our growls, the thunderous crash of each blow connectin', and the animals that had stuck around through the winter high-tailin' it out of our fuckin' way. Smart little Bambi-fuckers.
Bella's POV
I sat down on the tarnished brass bed and tried to avoid thinking about everything that had happened in the last few hours, but I quickly gave that up and opted to manically pace around the room instead. After a few minutes, there was a knock on the door and I said quietly, "Come in," knowing whoever was out there would hear me just fine.
"Hey, Sug, how are ya doin'?" Ah, Charlotte drew the short straw this time obviously.
Maybe she just wanted to check on you.
Pssh.
You do know that that doesn't actually count as an answer, right?... And neither does a shoulder shrug.
Yes it does, and with it, I answered both of you. I'm all about keeping it simple.
Since when?
"Anything I can help with?" Char asked.
"I'm gonna assume that you heard everything from before." She just nodded her head warily, probably wondering what was going to be my reaction to everyone knowing everything, but strangely, it felt liberating. They had already known the bare facts but having them know everything and not be trying to sprinkle me with holy water or some shit was nice. I felt like a huge weight had been lifted from my chest, something akin to an elephant in size. Though I was glad that they knew and weren't running for the hills, I still didn't understand why exactly, but that was not what I wanted to talk to her about. If the time came that they decided I was more trouble than I was worth then I would deal with it with dignity.
You mean clinging to the nearest leg and begging them not to leave?
Of course.
You know that they've reassured you of their sincerity as much as humanly, and inhumanly, possible. It's up to you to believe.
Which is exactly why I'm not voicing my concern about them, thank you very much.
"Good." I said, and she looked at me like I was crazy, with her blond eyebrows rising up to meet her hairline for a second before schooling her features into a mask of unaffected nonchalance. "Who all is within hearing range?"
"Just us. Peter and Jasper are…hunting, and Garrett went to pick up a couple of packages for Peter. So, go on." She waved her hand for me to continue and I sat on the bed, once again feeling exhausted beyond my years. Deciding I didn't want to ask what they were in the mood for, and that I had enough on my plate at the moment without worrying about their dinner, I spoke my mind.
"I don't understand why you guys have adopted me, or why you seem to care so much about what happens to me." As her nostrils flared and her mouth opened to butt in, I quickly assured her, "I don't understand it, but I accept it." She sat down next to me; the bed dipping slightly under the new weight added. "But what I don't get is why J-Mo says he wants me." I continued in a whisper, suddenly very interested in the old patchwork quilt beneath me.
"That's easy; you're his mate." My mouth fell open and I sat there stunned and floundering like a fish out of water. "Pumpkin?"
"Mate?" I rasped out doing a fab impression of an eighty-year old chain smoker while simultaneously choking out the word.
"Yes, in our world a ma-" I interrupted her, flailing both of my hands at her and hopping up to pace again, because this type of announcement is very deserving of a mini freak-out.
And I'm sure you'll give it that and much, much more.
"I know what a mate is! I thought - I mean, Alice had told me that E-Edward was my mate?" It came out a question because I was more confused than a hooker who wandered into the Sunday morning service in which every word is needlessly spoken in Latin.
You said his name. Woot!
Yeah, yeah I did. Hmm... but she said -
And we're back to our regularly scheduled freak-out.
I gave Char a pleading look, seeking some clarification on this new (to me, at least) development.
"She lied. Not that surprising when you consider the fact that her then-husband was meant to be your forever and she had no say in it. The bitch." Charlotte sneered out.
"Ok. I get why she didn't tell me the truth, but why push me toward Edward?"
"I don't know, Pumpkin. I wish I had all of the answers for you." And I believed her. "What I do know is that Jasper is your mate."
Holy droopy cow titties, Batman! There's that word again!
"His beast: his vampire self, the scary-ass vicious SOB that he is - recognized it before any of us knew. Well, I suspected based on how he attended to you and I'm pretty sure Peter knew almost since first meetin' you…" She trailed off thoughtfully, and I continued for her, knowing exactly where that statement had led.
"And if Red knew then G-Red did because they gossip like old beauty shop bitties minus the curlers in their hair." We both just kind-of nodded along in our thoughtful states for a moment, but looking at her matching spaced-out, speculative gaze, I plopped on the bed again and then we both broke down in giggles at the absurdity of it all. Catching my breath and sobering up, I voiced my original concern.
"But why does he want me? Is it like the wolves imprinting? He has no choice?" I came out borderline desperate, but I really needed to know. If this is some mystical force acting against his will then I don't want anything to do with it. I'd seen choices taken away from others and the consequences of that helplessly bound feeling; hell, I had less control of my own life than I'd ever thought was possible. We'd figure out something else, some other place for me to go so that he didn't have to be uncomfortable and he could go back to his after-life without having some call of the wild to contend with for the rest of my days; then when I died, he'd be free completely.
Before you pack your bags, maybe we should find out a few more details.
"From what I understand, the initial pull is weakened by the animal blood. It tends to dull our senses and our instincts. If it weren't for this and the, er… extenuating circumstances of your reunion, y'all probably would have made it official our first week here." Her voice took on a thoughtful tone and she tilted her head as she continued, "Not to mention, I have no clue how you being a human fiddles with it." But I wasn't listening to whatever was coming out of her mouth now, because all thought in my head screeched to an abrupt halt as I replayed her words. "Y'all probably would've made it official our first week here… Y'all probably would've made it official…made it official…"
When she said 'made it official', you don't think she meant -
Yeah, I do and now cue the hyperventilation in three…two….and -
OH MY NO! There's NO way he could want…I mean there's no way that I could…NO! Has he even seen me? He's used to ALICE for Bob's sake! I can't compare to that!
Who said it was a competition? At least you don't look like a young teenage boy; I think this works in your favor.
I'm no expert but I'm pretty sure that THAT would involve touching and I don't do touching.
Except with J-Mo.
That was a HUG!
And a little hand holding…
Yes and it was a freakin' miracle in and of itself BUT still no small hop, skip, or Superman super-sized bound from actual intimacy.
Just so you know, I disagree. Not that it matters, but yeah. I do.
While my mind went round and round like a rinky-dink, scary-ass carnival ride, I was beginning to feel dizzy. My breathing, which had been fast and shallow, finally required some attention. Apparently, Char felt so too because she was suddenly next to me, telling me to put my head between my legs and take some calming breaths.
I guess not much has changed over the years in treating a panic attack.
Speaking a word on every gasped inhale with my head firmly lodged beneath my knees, I said, "Char! I can't do that! I mean - have sex!" I squeaked out that last word and my head continued its Tilt-a-Whirl impression, making me glad I didn't have anything on my stomach to throw up right now.
"No one said you have to, Sugar. Now calm down." She looked slightly panicked, but as my breathing settled a bit and it became evident that I would live to panic again another day, her look changed to an exasperated one that was aimed firmly in my obtuse direction. I sat up as she laid into me.
"You should know better than that by now." She tsked me. "We - Jasper would NEVER make you do something of a sexual nature that you weren't a hundred percent okay with. Just so you know though, there may come a time when you want to be with someone in that way." She spoke louder, narrowing her eyes at my shaking head causing me to stop. "Believe it or not, it may and, Pumpkin, that is okay. It's more than okay really, it would be fabulous. Just because you were a victim of a horrible crime doesn't mean that you have to live out a self-imposed sentence of celibacy for the rest of your life."
Once again examining the quilt on the bed, I 'fessed up. "Before…" Damnit! I took a deep breath and tried again, this time spitting it all out before I lost my courage. "Before J-Jacob, I'd never had sex. Hell, I'd never even had an open mouth kiss!" She looked shocked and so I continued explaining my freakishly celibate teenage years. "Edward was my first real boyfriend. He was so guarded that we never even got close to anything that would be considered second base, even in a conservative Christian game with our parents and grandparents and couple of clergy men ogling from the stands. I wouldn't know what to do if I ever got in that position! Which I won't." I finished frantically.
"Oh Hon, let me just assure ya that you'd catch on real quick. Besides, the Major should be an excellent teacher." She smirked while wiggling her eyebrows impishly at me while I blushed furiously. This whole topic wasn't even in the same hemisphere as my comfort zone.
He has been around for a really long time.
Not helping! Neither of you!
"Next, what Jacob did to you was not sex and it sure as hell wasn't loving, thus it doesn't count toward your 'experience' in that area. He violated you; he hurt you. What Jacob did to you is nothing like what a consensual sexual relationship between a man and woman is like; especially when there's feelings there too. They're not even in the same league. Trust me on that, Pumpkin."
I started to interrupt, but she tilted her head, narrowing her eyes again and placing a hand on her hip, and I wisely snapped my mouth shut.
Now you see how she keeps all those males in line.
"I'm not sayin' you need to just say fuck it and, well, fuck him." She smirked at what I'm sure was a terrified, coming-to-Jesus look on my face. "Just keep yourself open to the possibilities. That's all." I nodded even while every fiber of my being was screaming, "Hell to the no times infinity squared!" And I quickly took this opportunity to steer the conversation away from sex and back to mating.
Umm. That's not what I -
Yeah. See, I don't even have to say anything about that one.
"So, he doesn't like like me against his will? It's not just due to some irresistible vamp mating mojo?"
"He is drawn to you, but he does have a choice and so do you. Some believe that mating is our vampire side seeking its soul mate; some that it's just finding the person that would best suit its fancy. Either way, mating just provides the pull. After all, you can lead a horse to water -"
"But you can't make it fuck the hot-ass stallion that's there taking a sip." I finished for her, not entirely sure I'd meant to say that out loud, and definitely not sure if this whole 'mate' thing was a simple as she made it out to be, but I decided to give her the benefit of the doubt. Of course that was largely attributed to my strong desire to not be talking about this bizarro version of the birds and the bees anymore, and the stress headache already causing me to scrunch my shoulders up to my ears in an effort to relieve some of the pressure from my taut neck muscles and the knot of pain in the base of my skull.
"So he wants me because?" I asked yet again as I massaged my neck.
"You'll have to ask him for the specifics, but -" And she smirked as my eyes doubled in size and my head started shaking, "He's gotten the chance to get to know you and he likes," She rolled her eyes and snorted before going on, "what he knows of you. Same as any other man askin' a girl out on a date, Sug." She took a breath before she asked, "More importantly, how do you feel about him?"
She was practically vibrating in her excitement while waiting on me to answer, and I took my time, pretending to think hard while she was doing a great imitation of a potty-dance for a chick who hadn't copped a squat to pee in decades.
"I'm not exactly sure." I hedged, getting no small amount of satisfaction from making her squirm for once. At least until she growled out the words 'spill it' with a menacing look on her beautiful face.
"Well, I like him…" She waved her hand in the universal sign of 'and…. get on with it'. So I continued again slowly, considering each word carefully before it fell from my tongue, "He's sweet, but still an ass. Definitely not afraid to tell me like it is. He's honest almost to a fault and his ass in a pair of jeans should be outlawed. Though admittedly I don't have much to compare him to, but I can recognize a good man when I see one, and Jasper is a damn good man." I took a deep breath and closed my eyes as all of my conflicting but potent feelings about the god-like vampire rose up and lodged in my throat; the intensity of the sudden onslaught making it hard to swallow, and I choked out, "I think that falling in love with him would be as easy as breathing and just as natural."
Her girlish gush was cut off by a sharp knock at the door, and my heart skipped a beat at the sudden presence of another person in our little world that we'd been in while we sat on the big brass bed. I breathed a sigh of relief when it was G-Red's head that poked in the door with his same happy-happy-joy-joy expression that he sported ninety-nine percent of the time.
"I have a delivery for you, Little One." He said, as he extended the long brown parcel. It was long and about the width of three shirt boxes and simply addressed to P. Whitlock. My curiosity was piqued to say the least. He nodded his head toward Char as I looked at him questioningly.
"Peter thought you might like something special to wear tonight. I have no clue what's in there and he told me to let you know that you don't have to wear it, because Jasper would be just as happy to see you in your normal jeans and thermal shirts. He said that this was just to give you another option." She shrugged and we all eyed the package like it was going to go ahead and tell us what was in there any moment now.
"Well?" G-Red interrupted my musings; apparently he was passed over when they were handing out that infamous vampire patience I'd always heard so much about.
A snort was my only response to him cause I know how much he loves that sound as I gingerly unwrapped the box.
You were one of those kids that tried not to tear their wrapping paper, running your fingers along the seams to just cut through the tape, weren't you?
Maybe.
Well that's just annoying. It's not like anyone's going to reuse that paper; you're not saving the rain forest. Seriously. And it's not going to explode. Rip into the sucker already so we can see the goods.
This was one of those rare instances where, well, I was right, so I tore through the rest of the paper and yanked the lid off to find a fuck-ton of white tissue paper. Proceeding with a bit more caution, I unfolded it layer by layer until I finally revealed the most perfect dress for a date with a Confederate soldier I could've ever imagined.
If I had ever fathomed this, which I hadn't. But if I had -
AND you're babbling.
"It's for me?" I asked, running my hands over the folds of silk, marveling at the feel of it sliding between my fingers.
"Yes. Well, you and the Major." I could hear the smirk in her voice, but I didn't want to take my eyes off of the dress. I'd never owned or even seen something like this outside of history books and behind glass at the American History museum. She started gently unpacking the box and I was grateful that she was there because there was a lot more in that box than could possibly be for one outfit. I actually got a tad bit scared as she started ticking items off of whatever mental list she had going.
"Drawers," She said as she threw a pair of large white, cotton undergarments trimmed in lace aside, "I think we'll go modern for that, don't you?" She stared at me for a few moments before I snapped out of my duh-imbibed state and realized she wanted my input.
"Modern." I said nodding while eyeing the drawers and watching her from the side as she continued her inventory while laying everything out. "Chemise, stockings, garters, petticoats-" And she kept going I'm sure, but I tuned her out as I picked up what Char had called a corset from the bed and held it up to me, wondering how in the hell I was even going to get into this. It reminded me of those Chinese finger traps that one of Renee's more serious beaus kept giving me every time he came over. I was thirteen and less than impressed; especially when I had to have my mom cut the thing off.
Didn't they outlaw these quoting cruelty and torment against woman-kind?
Don't think so. No.
Charlotte clapped her hands together, drawing my attention back to her, "Even with the six-bone hoop skirt, which it's a miracle he remembered even with vampire recall because he's still just a man after all, you should be comfortable enough as long as we don't cinch that too tight." She said, pointing to the red corset still in my grip. I heard a boisterous laugh from the doorway and suddenly remembered what I'd forgotten in the course of my fondling of antique undies, which was that we weren't alone in the room.
"Ah! I miss the days of corsets and well-dressed females." He sighed in a wistful tone. "There's something to be said for the thrill of exploring hidden territory that ladies do not understand now-a-days. Not that I'm complaining, when I was a youth, you had to pay a hard-earned dime to see much skin."
My retort died in my throat as Charlotte dropped the red velvet slippers she had beside the bed and held the bodice of the beautiful dress up to me. I stepped sideways to catch a glimpse in the tarnished mirror sitting on top of the chest of drawers across the room.
The red silk flowed down meeting the gatherings in the skirt portion perfectly each time. The black lace accents on the skirt were just lovely, but as my eyes made finished their journey up the dress to look in the mirror, my heart sank to the pit of my stomach and my hands fisted around handfuls of smooth silk. The top was red silk with black lace accents just like the bottom along with some black beading, but there was no neckline. It was an off the shoulder dress with only black lace shawl sleeves to cover the tops my arms. Nothing but skin would be visible from above my nonexistent cleavage line. Nothing but my scars that is.
I took a deep breath, pulled my gaze from the old mirror and turned to tuck the beautiful dress back in its box.
I should've known. Nothing that lovely was meant for me.
"You're not gonna wear the dress, are you?" Char sighed out sadly and I just shook my head.
"Why?" Said the vamp that I'd yet again forgotten was in the room for the second time in five minutes.
"It's nothing." I sighed, as Char just shook her head this time.
"It is not 'nothing', Little One. I saw your eyes light up when you held that dress. What changed with one look into that mirror?" He crossed his arms, assuming a stubborn, unyielding stance and I sat down on the bed, too tired to fight a fight that I had no desire to fight in the first place.
"It's just…It shows too much skin." He looked confused for a second before comprehension dawned in his eyes and they flickered to the top of my high collared shirts where the edges of a couple of my scars still managed to peek out; then he flinched slightly before dropping that damn cool-ass vamp mask.
"That's why!" I shouted more in an 'ah-ha! Gotcha' kinda way than a 'grr, I'm angry' one. He started to apologize, but that's not what I wanted. Besides it wasn't G-Red that went all attack-mode on me and left me marred for life. I wanted him - them both - to just understand. "I don't blame you for flinching at my hideousness, but I'll be damned if I'll stand and watch Jasper do the same. I don't know why it's different, but it is." I finished quietly.
You know why. You just don't want to admit it.
Garrett held his hands up in surrender, "It's different because your feelings for him are of a different nature, but let us get something straight right this moment; you are not hideous." His voice became little more than a low growl by the end of his declaration. He took a deep breath, dropped his hands to his side and continued in a fervent, pleading tone. "I am angry about what you have suffered. The scars remind me of this; that is all. I care about you very much, Isabella. You are a beautiful female of worth; inside and out. Never doubt this. If a male cannot see this then he is blind and does not deserve you."
His sincerity showcased the truth of his words, and I couldn't help but smile with fresh tears streaming down my cheeks; only this time, they were happy tears. I stepped toward him cautiously and opened my arms a bit; his eyes got huge as he caught my intentions.
I can do this…For him, I can do this…I can do this
He stayed perfectly still besides opening his arms in invitation.
C'mon. One more step -
I took that last step and he wrapped his arms around me real gentle, like I was the most precious, but extremely breakable thing he'd ever held. I didn't know how I'd gotten lucky enough to be adopted by such amazing vampires, no - people, but I swear that I felt my little Grinch-bitch heart swell three sizes as I thought about just how good they were to me.
I DID IT!
And with only minimal tensing. Very good.
I stepped back and his arms immediately returned to his sides. His smile seemed impossibly huge, and though I could see way more of his pearly whites than I'm sure any human still living ever had, I felt no fear. I just returned it, proud of myself and enjoying the Hallmark quality of the moment before I had to get back to ugly reality.
After clearing my throat to shove all of those pesky emotions back to where they belonged, I said "Thank you, G-Red, really. But as you said, my feelings for him are of a different nature. You're my brother and you see me like a sister, I think -" here his smile yet again grew and he nodded rapidly. "And I sure hope that's not how J-Mo sees me." I looked down suddenly so unsure of myself and hating the feeling of my emotions shifting like sand beneath me with every new thought. Any moment now, I felt like I might just sink.
Char, who had held her tongue remarkably well up till now, snorted and simply said, "I think it's safe to say he doesn't consider you a sister, Hon. I know he's from the south, but his family tree branches out all the same."
"What if the scars scare him off? What if he finally understands that -" And my insecurity gush was interrupted by G-Red.
"You are scared to trust and I understand this, but I assure you that you could wear a burlap sack and that male would still drool over you, and look at you like you were his Alpha and Omega: his beginning and end; however, Peter did give you one more option." His smile grew to a Cheshire cat level as he reach behind his back and removed a second parcel that he'd had tucked into the waistline of his pants, apparently.
Not sure how you missed that.
I was busy with all of the touching and being touched and stuff. Shut it.
I eyed it suspiciously as he extended it out for me to take. Begrudgingly, I grabbed the small, poorly wrapped gift and I stopped and stared at it for a good few minutes as I processed what I was looking at. The label simply said, "To: Sister Pumpkin" which was a bit strange I grant you, but not awe-worthy because this was Red I was dealing with here. He and strange shit were sort-of a package deal. No, what had caused my brain to short circuit on a whole new route of WTF was the wrapping paper. It was grey with circles of brightly colored starving Ethiopian children: red, pink, green, orange, and blue, and the writing that read "Millions of children die every year from starvation. Bet you won't complain about what you get now."
I stared at G-Red, and then at Char, in shock.
"He tried to wrap up himself in that same paper for Christmas." She said rolling her eyes. My shock kicked up another notch, Garrett laughed, and she just shrugged and told me to go on and open it. This time I took my time stripping the paper with no argument from any pesky voices who couldn't mind their own business.
Of course not; I want to save this shit as much as you do.
Oh yeah. Totally scrap-bookable.
Finally removing the already crinkled insane-o-paper, folding it neatly and setting it aside; I finally turned my attention to the contents of the package, which appeared just to be a black bundle of cloth. Shaking it out though, I knew what it was almost instantly, as a white coif and another black scrap that I was sure was the accompanying veil fell to the ground. It was a nun's Holy Habit.
What a dick!
I don't think you're supposed to say things like that while holding a nun's get-up. But yeah, holy shit.
And with that thought, the sand finally swept me onto my ass and I laughed until I cried.
Or maybe the other way around? Hmmm, not sure.
At least you have -
Options…yeah.
Seems like more are opening up every minute.
"Should we be worried?" I heard Char ask, as she giggled. I guess my hysteria was catchy.
"I don't think so; no. I cannot wait to tell Peter she hugged me though." I could hear the pride and awe in his voice and I knew, even through my cackles and tears, that for this night at least, I would be just fine. We would all be just fine.
Jasper's POV
As we sat lickin' our wounds, well - actually, spittin' the venom on our hands, and then applying it to our scratches and a couple of new bite marks that we were both sportin', I thought again about what my next course of action was.
"We stick to the plan." The fuckin' wanker picked now to chime in, of course, but I disagreed.
"Like fuck! I want their heads on the sticks they fetch by the end of the week." I growled out, and I knew my eyes were as black as coal as my temper rose again, but he didn't back down.
"Well, Princess, this isn't Burger King and ya don't get everything your fuckin' way. So you can stick your tiera up your ass, cause ya know that we should stick to the fuckin' plan." I roared in my frustration because I knew he was right. Damn it! There were too many unknowns still to go in there and John Wayne this shit. If it was only my life at stake, I'd still go right this very moment, but I knew surer than shit that Peter and Garrett would follow me. Hell, the women probably wouldn't be far behind them. So I nodded.
"Fine. We stick to the plan." I ran my fingers through my hair and tried to calm the fuck down again. To stop myself from obsessin' about what was to come in the next weeks, I started thinkin' about how I wanted tonight to go. It'd been a long time since I'd done the datin' thing and this was gonna be a little different at any rate. For one thing, it wasn't gonna end with my cock buried in her, but I was okay with that.
Man, a lot had changed in the last few months. If only I knew how I should proceed. I felt like I was goin' into this completely blind, and while I was happy as a pig rollin' in shit that I no longer had someone telling me every move we were gonna make before we made it, this thing between me and Bella was too fuckin' important to wing it. I didn't have faith in fate or 'what will be will be' shit.
I just didn't know what to expect from her. I'd like to think that she had made tremendous progress, and truthfully, I knew she had but entering a relationship after what she'd been through was a whole different ball game.
Peter picked this moment to open his fat fuckin' mouth with sarcasm drippin' from his tone. "Golly gee whiz, if only you knew someone you could ask for advice. A guy whose girl has been through a similar thing maybe? Too bad -" I cut off his Leave It to Beaver rambling speech with a sharp jab to his shoulder and I picked up my cell to call the one vampire I knew had some experience in this area.
"And don't worry about the scent trails. We'll scan the area and confuse the paths when we head out tonight." I nodded my acknowledgment and sent him a show of my gratitude as he took off back toward the cabin.
"Hey Brother! It's been a long fucking while." I could hear Esme getting' on to him in the background for his language and I rolled my eyes as the big lug muttered an apology.
"Hey Em, you mind goin' somewhere where we can speak in private?"
After a second of hesitation, he answered, "Sure thing. Give me a minute." I took the phone away from my ear as the whistlin' of the wind blowin' past him made me cringe. After a few minutes and no doubt twenty plus miles on his end, he asked, "So what's up? You in trouble and need to bring in the big guns?" He flexed his biceps as he said this. I may not have been there to see it, but I knew him and there wasn't a doubt in my mind. Probably kissed the fuckers as well. He was as proud of those as he was of his jeep and that was sayin' somethin'.
"Nah, man. Nothin' like that." I could always count on Emmett to be up for a fight. "I need your advice about a girl."
"Dude, I told you chicks don't like it when you do the Dirty Sanchez on the first time."
"Aww, shit. Not that, you dirty fuck! But I should tell you I found a red head down in Louisiana who not only wanted me to do it but asked if I could hold a mirror so she could watch." His bellowing laughter caused me to pull the phone away from my ear yet again until it died down.
"You didn't drink from that one, did you?" I could almost feel his humor through the phone it was so strong.
"What the fuck, man? Did Rose hit ya one time too many? The chick had shit on her face." And again we had to wait for the laughter to die down.
"Only you man, only you. Ya know we've only got about five before Rosie comes and butts her fine ass in, so what's up?"
"I don't know how to ask this so I'm just gonna spit it out." Yeah. That's easier said than done.
"Never known you to be shy, Jazzy-poo." He mocked in a high, sing-song voice. I could picture him flutterin' his lashes and completing a perfect pirouette on the other end of the line. I kind-of missed the goofy bastard.
"Fuck it." I sighed. This was like sex with an ugly chick - best just to get it over with. "I'm with Peter and Char right now and I've met someone."
"Really? That's great man!" I could tell he still had no clue where I was goin' with this. Not that he should since I had yet to actually say it.
"Here's the thing. She's human an-"
"Fuck! Jazz, you sly dog! I've never known you to play with your food more than once. This chick must be a total hottie."
"Yeah, she is. I think you'd like her." In fact, I knew he'd love her; he already did like she was his own flesh and blood. It was the only reason he went along with the family's decision to distance themselves from me. He'd apologized afterwards and shit, but I was still more than a little pissed at the time that he'd chosen her over me. Now I understood, and I'd do the same without battin' a fuckin' eye and with no apology.
"Does that mean I'll get to meet your new woman? Rose was talkin' about trying to track you down before we took off for Africa next month anyway." Oh shit. Glad I'd called because that would've been the definition of bad.
"Um, it's still a little early to introduce her to the ex-in-laws. Let's hold off on that for now." I hedged. And for my next trick, I'll change the subject and get my answers in one fell swoop. "Back to why I was callin'; she has a rough past….like Rose." I added quietly.
"Oh. What do you want to know?" He said instantly serious.
"I'm the first man she's dated since it happened about three years ago and I just don't know how slow I should take this thing or what not to do, ya know? I just thought you might have some pointers to pass along. If you don't want to talk about it though man, I understand. I just thought -"
"I get it. Has she told you about it?"
"Yeah. Just earlier today as a matter of fact." I growled as the conversation began replayin' through the recesses of my mind.
"That's a huge thing there; it means she trusts you already. All I can really say is follow her lead. It took years before Rose stopped freezing up every time I touched her or when she'd catch the scent of whiskey. That was one of her triggers that she eventually told me took her back to that street that night, made it real for her again. In the beginning it was always one step forward and two back, but I did learn a few things that might help. Don't pity her or walk on eggshells around her about her past, but at the same time, tread lightly. Your gift should be a huge asset here, but mostly just be patient, man."
I listened, still and silent, to the man that I'd considered my brother for the better part of the last few decades and absorbed for the first time what even my gift had allowed me to fully comprehend; Emmett's love for Rosalie was deep and strong. And just as rare; it was what everyone strived for and few ever reached. My respect for him continued to grow as he continued to talk.
"You know, even now, Rosie still has her bad days over what those bastards did to her. I don't think this is the kind-of thing that someone ever gets over; more like they just learn to deal, to live again. If you're the man I know you are you'll help her with that and if you're not and this just some random quest for hard-to-get pussy, move along now or I'll kick your ass, Bro."
I had to hold back the snort, because the only way Em could kick my ass was in a play match and with a great deal of restraint on my behalf, but I appreciated the sentiment behind the threat, and I had no doubt that he'd rack up some damage to me tryin'. "My intentions are honorable, I assure you."
"They better be. Man, I can't wait to meet the human that has you wrapped around her finger. I bet she has jumbo tits." Ah, here's the normal Emmett again, but I didn't appreciate him talkin' about Bella this way. "After spending all of that time with Alice, you've gotta want to spend some time motor boating, or just spend some time staring at peaks larger than her teeny-weeny ant hills." My growl came out low and fierce, and I figured it was a minute past time to change the fuckin' subject.
"Has Doucheward come home yet or is he still off sulkin' in some third world squalor?" I didn't really care where the hell that fag-basket was, but I needed to know how much Em was gonna have to guard his thoughts. Emmett wasn't dumb by any stretch of the imagination but his thoughts were simple, honest; therefore, he had a tough time when it came to keepin' his thoughts private. The man also had no shame, so there was hardly anything he ever tried to hide except when he did somethin' that would guarantee a sex-ban from Rose. Emmett didn't know that I was with Bella, but Alice sure did and if Eddie had gleaned enough from her, and then caught my little chat with Emmett, he was bound to get curious. And a curious Eddie was just one more pussy than I needed to worry about at the moment.
"Nope. He's still off moping around Europe with Alice and her new beau - ah, shit! Sorry man."
"Don't be. I'm sure as hell not." And it was the truth. For the first time since I'd been dismissed by my wife,I didn't regret it at all. No remorse for my short-comings; no anger at her callousness. I could really care less whom she opened her legs for anymore; God knows I'd never go back there again.
"Rosie's coming so I'll catch ya later, but don't wait so long to pick up the phone next time, Brother."
"Yeah, yeah. Hey, do me a solid and keep the details of our little chat to yourself."
"No prob."
"And thanks, Em."
"Anytime, Bro. Good luck." And with that I pressed end and headed to pick up a few of the wolves that I could smell a few miles east, before goin' toward the cabin to start getting' ready for what I hoped was just the first of many dates with my mate.
Walkin' in the door, everything was already set up exactly as I'd planned, and from the glee and accomplishment rollin' off of the cocky bastard propped up against the wall, I knew who I had to thank. "Know-it-all Fucker, you really need to stay out of my head. There's some passin' thoughts in there about your wife you might not appreciate too much."
"Shit. I spend about half of my day thinkin' 'bout her titties and the other half thinkin' about things to do to them. I don't give a fuck what goes into your spank-bank." He smirked and I felt his mischievousness kick it up a notch. "Char, on the other hand, said she'd deal with ya later."
"Aw, fuck." As I kicked the now-dirt floor beneath my boots, I noticed the box in his hands for the first time.
"I saved you a trip to the post office." My brother said as he held out the parcel that I'd had sent from a small storage facility I rented in El Paso when I'd first decided that I was going to ask Bella out, and what it was that we would do if she said yes. His mischief was still strong but so was his joy and love, so once I opened the lid and saw that everything was as it should be, I figured the fucker was just plottin' something for later.
Bella's POV
He knocked gently on the door promptly at seven and my heart skipped a beat, knowing that I was going on a date - a real date. Never in all of my most druggy drug-induced hallucinations had this ever been a path that I'd imagined my future could take.
What I'd always known was that I died that day on that garage floor; my life as I had known it had ended. No dramatics, just truth. What I was just beginning to accept was that where one life had ended brutally, another had begun. I finally felt like I was learning to walk in this new, scary world, and I'd be eternally grateful for these people that had held my hand, steadied me and told me it would be okay, because without them, I wouldn't have made it to this point.
My nerves were nearing critical level but there was a good bit of excitement mixed in too, as I waited with baited breath for Charlotte to open the door.
Jasper's POV
What I saw once that door opened at a torturously slow pace, would've made my heart stop if it had been beatin', but instead I just stared at the loveliest vision my sight had ever beheld.
There she was all dressed up in a scarlet dress with black trim, dainty black lace gloves on her hands, her hair pulled back in the style of my youth, and a black lace choker around her neck. Her skin practically glowed in contrast to the dress; she was all cream and roses. My eyes followed the dangly bit on her choker's path straight down to an impressively perky and exhibited rack. Looked like she could just bust out of that damn dress any second, and no matter how beautiful she looked with it on, I couldn't stop my mind from wanderin' to how she'd look out of it. Just so damn amazing. Fuck me. Please.
"Close your mouth, Major; don't want something flyin' in there, huh? And when you open it again, be useful and say somethin' nice. She's mighty nervous, Hon." Charlotte whispered as she passed.
I snapped my jaw shut that I hadn't even noticed was hangin' loose and walked the few steps toward this angel that had somehow said yes to me. Keepin' this asexual just got a whole lot harder. Coincidently, so had my cock.
"You're welcome." The fucker hollered, as his laughter rang out through the cabin.
Bella's POV
I couldn't believe my eyes when she pushed the door aside. There he stood: tall and proud in what I was sure was his uniform from his Army days. His grey double-breasted frock coat hit about mid-thigh on his long muscular legs, which were sheathed in wool trousers. His brass buttons gleamed in the light as did his belt buckle bearing the letters "CSA" and the gold star in the center of his collar. From the boots on his feet to the low swooping hat on his head, he oozed a quiet authority and cool confidence that I didn't think it had anything to do with the vampire thing.
And hotness. He's damn smexy all soldiered-up.
Empath. A sing-song voice reminded me a little too gleefully for someone who's supposed to be on my side.
And just like that my unashamed ogling morphed into severe embarrassment. I was pretty sure my cheeks now matched my dress.
Red's howling from the direction of the living room brought my eyes to the door, where the object of my temporary lust excursion was now smiling in my direction.
Removing his hat and bowing slightly, he said "You look beautiful, Darlin'." When my heart skipped another couple of beats and my cheeks continued to invent new shades of blush, his smile changed into a sexy smirk and his eyes danced with delight.
Maybe I have some kind of arrhythmia or something?
Yeah. I'm sure that's it.
"Shall we?" He asked, after replacing his hat, He offered me his arm like the Southern gentleman he was and I took it, grateful for the support, since between him in his uniform and my nerves in general, I wasn't sure if I'd be able to walk unassisted.
I gasped as I took in the drastic change of the living room. The scanty furniture was gone and the wooden floor was now covered with dirt. Hay bales dotted the perimeter. The only light came from the fire simmering low in the fireplace and the several lanterns hanging sporadically around the room.
A small, unassuming table sat in the corner covered with a simple gingham cloth and topped with a vase of wildflowers that had to have come from town because winter was still in full swing around these parts, a lantern, and what looked like an assortment of finger foods: cheeses, fresh fruit, and tiny sandwiches. There were a couple of pitchers sitting nearby the trays of food accompanied by two long stem glasses. Everything was like a dream; a dream from a different world, and one that I belonged to, if only for a night.
My attention was drawn to the vampires in the room that I'd completely ignored while I'd taken in my drastically changed surroundings when Red coughed and said, "Good choice, Strawberry Shortcake. This suits you much better than the holier-than-thou look." He winked.
Jasper looked confused, but I wasn't going to explain, "Well, we'd better be moseying along now." Char cut through the short, awkward silence.
"Where are you guys going?" I asked shocked. I don't know why I thought they'd hang around to chaperone or why I thought we needed chaperones at all, but for some reason, I did and I did.
"We're goin' huntin', Cupcake. Want me to bring ya back something?" He smirked.
"Some Rocky Road would be nice, thanks." I answered absent-mindedly; still overwhelmed by my shock.
In your defense, this has been an emotionally charged twenty-four.
Jasper ignored Red's smartass completely, stepping in front of me to claim my full attention, and asked, "Unless you want them to stay, Darlin'?" I'm sure he was pickin' up my shock and mild panic, but with one look into his concerned, burgundy eyes, I knew my answer.
"No, I think we'll be just fine on our own." No sooner had the words left my mouth; then they were gone.
After munching on the food laid out, which was just perfect for my butterfly-swarming stomach, and some idle chit-chat, Jasper picked up a remote that I'd never seen before and music began filling the room.
"May I have this dance, Miss Bella?" Jasper asked with his accent thick and his hand extended.
"Um, I can't dance." I said suddenly feeling like an imposter; all dolled up like a lady with nothing but the anatomically correct parts to recommend me to play the part.
"You just follow my lead. You'll learn quick." And I balked. "Do you trust me?" He said, still holding his hand out to me. It only took a second to know that without a doubt that I did, and so I reached out and placed my hand in his and he led me out to our make-shift dance floor, which was the majority of the living room floor.
He took my hands and hooked them around his neck for the time being and placed his around my waist cautiously.
After a few minutes of this slow shuffling, I actually got the hang of it and I'm sure my face showed my 'look at me, I'm doing it without leaving tread marks on your boots' pride. He returned my smile with a tight one of his own and we continued our dance in quiet till he broke my concentration with "Why do you smell so strongly of Garrett?"
"Oh… I hugged him?" It came out more like a question, mostly due to my confusion over his sudden change and hardened tone.
"Why?" He damn near growled. I stepped back, bringing my hands away from his neck and to my hips, but he didn't release his hold on me. If anything, he tightened his grip just a smidge.
"Because I wanted to! Did someone forget to slip you your happy pill today or what?" I damn near growled back. "I'm not a child and I won't be treated like one." After a minute of a glaring stand-off, he caved.
"You're right and I'm sorry, Darlin'. I over-reacted; I know. I just -" He sighed deeply and closed his eyes, cutting me off from trying to read his eyes.
"Just?" I prompted.
"Just nothing. I'm sorry." As he apologized I felt his remorse surround me.
"I accept." I said as we started swaying again to the slow beat. "G-Red came through for me today in a very brotherly way and I wanted to show him my appreciation. Plus it gives him something to jab Red with, which after today, he so deserves, let me tell you. Does this have anything to do with mate/vampire stuff?" In his arms seemed to be the best place to ask this question.
He seemed taken aback for about two seconds before he heaved another sigh, "So Char spilled about the mate thing, huh?" He asked in a defeated tone while eyeing me warily.
"Yep. Why didn't you just tell me?" I asked, searching his eyes for any sign of deception or regret as he thought, and then again as he talked and we continued our now gentle sway to whatever was playing right now.
"Honestly, I was still dealin' with it myself. It's harder than I thought it would be to control myself when it comes to you, but I'm tryin', Bella. I also didn't want you to feel like you had to love me too."
"Funny, I thought the same thing about you when I first found out. I didn't want you to have your free will taken away. Wait!" I gasped as my dawdling mind leisurely processed the rest of his statement, "You love me?" His eyes boring into mine were as serious as a Big-Mac-induced heart attack but more tender than any look ever directed my way before.
"More every day, Darlin'." Though I was tempted to embrace the fuzziness that clouded the edge of my vision from my shock, beckoning me into a stress-free unconscious state so that I could deal with this in my own time and in my head, I fought off that urge, laid my head on his chest, and reveled in the feeling of just being in his arms as we shuffled around our make-shift dance floor in the gentle glow of the lantern's light, and the light reflected from the glow off of the white snow coming in from the windows.
"I hear the others on their way back in; may I escort you to your door, Miss Bella?" He said, layin' on that panty-dropping accent as thick as molasses, and topping it with a smirk that made me swoon a bit. Lost for words because of him and his damn man-charm, I just nodded like an idiot and took his arm, lacing mine through the crook, and we walked the few steps back to the door where he'd 'picked me up' only a few short hours ago.
"I had a great time tonight, Isabella." A small shiver slid down my spine for some unknown reason every time he said my name like that- soft and lilting. It felt more intimate than any touch I'd ever received.
"Me too. Thank you so much, Jasper." I said, and I hoped he could feel exactly how much I meant it. "Everything was perfect, but I've gotta ask; why did you choose this as our first date? It seems like an awful lot of trouble." As he looked down and his hands fiddled with the hat that was now in them, he looked very much human. It was sweet to see this side of him. I got the feeling that not many had the opportunity to.
"Short version?" He asked and I nodded, turning to look at him and leaning against the door frame we'd just reached. "My first 'date' as a human was to a small country dance set up sort of like this. We lived too far out of the city to be in 'real' society and no one in the surroundin' counties even had a house large enough to host a proper gatherin', but us farm folks still got together once a month durin' the warm seasons. I don't remember the gal I escorted or much else really, but I knew I wanted to share it with you. Knowin' I won't forget a moment this time. I wish everything' with you was my first, but it's not cause I've been around a long time, Darlin', but I can tell you that all of my last firsts will belong to you."
I'd always thought that love had to burn bright and strong every second; you know, all-consuming, to be true love. The problem with that is when it dies nothing is left behind but ash, because there had never been anything of substance built; once the obsessive passion dies, so does what was called love. This feeling I had now: the one I wasn't ready to smack a label on and call it 'love'; this feeling was a simmering one. I recognized it now. Always present and growing in strength, but when he said stuff like that, it woke from its dormant state like a volcano. Erupting forth with an intensity that I'd forgotten my jaded little human heart was even capable of feeling. I wondered if I ever had before.
It took me a minute to string words together once again while I was looking at him. "Well, it was the most perfect last first date a girl could ever ask for." His smile straightened and I briefly wondered if I'd said the wrong thing, before his eyes flickered from mine to my mouth and back again. He was searching my eyes for an answer that I didn't have, but he didn't give me much time to ponder, fortunately.
He leaned in and as gentle as a whisper, his lips brushed against mine. Lava central had apparently relocated further south because it wasn't my heart that burned now; it was the pit of my stomach sending heat and pure need through my body. Before I could do anything but register all of the new, terrifying emotions rushing through my body, he backed up. His eyes were dark, but for once, fear was not a prominent emotion in my body.
"I'll be back in a bit to help ya sleep, Darlin'."
He placed his hat back on his head and tipped it before he strutted away, leaving me propped against the door frame, just staring at his retreating figure in shock.
My hand floated up to my mouth, to my lips that had just brushed his. God, how I wanted that to be my last first kiss.
AN:REVIEW PLEASE! Let me know what ya think!
So I'm back! Did ya miss me? Hmmm. Well, that there was over 10K to let y'all know how much I appreciate all of the love and support I've received from you fuck-awesome peeps.
Thanks to my beta, Stitchcat. She works every chap to make sure it's readable and I GREATLY appreciate her! She doesn't even yell at me when I go back and ruin her grammatical perfection. Like this time when I added about 1K. Love ya bb. And my pre-reader, HammerHips, who lets me send her jumbled chaps and gives me honest input; I couldn't do this without y'all (especially this week) so thanks.
OH! I almost forgot! I'm thinkin' about writing a O/S from the villains' POV for my Spencer Bell Legacy contribution. Would anyone be interested in that?