First of all I just wanna thank you ALL for being so amazing to little old me.

I am gasping in shock that you guys actually care about silly OC's I made and actually read that last chapter that had like 5% of Klaine it it. Jalan is a ship now :)) That makes me happy.

I wish I could hug you all *le hugs the screen* FF is not showing all my reviews, again ( -_- ) but I got them and you're just amazing, okay?

Thank you for not thinking I'm an overkill :) And for thinking my crazy OOC Kaline is fun. :)

Kay, silly drunk Kurt ahead, before Blaine gives him his present and they all get arrested :))))

Enjoy :)

"Oh my God, who died?" Oliver wobbled out of his room, woken up by the bell on the doors downstairs.

"What is that noise?" Sean called out, sticking only his head through the door, not even opening his eyes.

"Four riders of the Apocalypse, judging by the sound of it." Luke groaned as he stepped into the hallway.

"What's going on?" Kelan was rubbing his eyes as he too, joined them.

"What is he doing here?" Alisha jumped in said boys arms, hugging him. "I didn't know you're back." she smiled.

"Oh yes, Jalan is back on, yippie. Now shut up and let's go see if that's just a polite burglar or it's the apocalypses indeed."

"Hey James, get up, there's someone at the door," Kelan opened the door to James's room to wake him up.

"Kelan, what were three things I said you could wake me up for in the middle of the night?" he asked drowsily.

"Erm..." other boy was searching his head. "Earthquake, surprise blowjob and If I'm on fire and no one's around to put a can of water over my head."

"The Earth is not shaking, nothing is being sucked, you better be on fire, Kelan," James gritted trough his teeth, not making any effort to get up. "Or I'm gonna set you on one."

"Come on, lazy ass, maybe it's something important, get up," Kelan walked back into the room and gently shook sleeping boy. "Go check and I'll make sure I woke you up FOR a reason." he said, kissing his earlobe and making him squirm.

"Urgh, fine, I'm up." James threw the covers off and marched out the doors. "There better be someone dead or dying," he gritted to three other boys as they walked down the stairs.

Oliver, first in line, yanked the doors open and dropped his jaw.

On their doorstep was equal parts annoyed and amused Blaine, supporting Kurt, who was very clearly, drunk off his ass.

"FeeeeellaZ," he slurred, waving like a madman even though they were only a feet apart.

"Oh my God, what happened to him?" Luke asked.

"Oh about 30 cocktails, give or take a few," Blaine was trying to carry Kurt across the threshold. "A little help here?" he hissed and boys jumped to action.

Just as they unwrapped his arm from around Blaine's neck, Kurt broke free skipped, actually skipped forward, landing onto the sofa in one ungraceful jump.

"Oi!" Blaine yelled to get attention of the 4 boys currently looking at their best friend lovingly. Stupid adorable ass. "Why the fuck isn't any of you answering your phone and why does none of you own a god damn car?" Blaine demanded to know.

"We… We take cabs." Sean said, not really sure where THAT question came from.

"Aha!" Blaine exclaimed. "And do you have any idea how hard it is to get a cab at 3am, on a weekend in fucking LA?"

"Very, probably." James ignored his obviously well prepared rant. "Where were you two? He was gone all day. Why are you not drunk?"

"Cause I didn't drink! Someone had to take care of that thing over there," Blaine said with a soft smile, eyeing Kurt who was currently trying to look at his too short bangs, pulling them down.

"Why did you let him drink that much?" Sean was lost. "I have never seen him that shitfaced."

"I'm not his mother to forbid him anything," Blaine explained. "He showed up at my place around 7 today, already buzzed, saying how he wants cocktails and blowjobs not necessarily in that order," Blaine couldn't help but smile. "He said in a few short hours he's gonna be old and probably bald and that I should use his hot body while I still can. So, I'm thinking he has issues with tomorrow, well, today being his birthday."

"Aaahhhh." The four boys groaned in unison. "Fuck, we forgot about the birthday drama." James face palmed.

"Wow, wow, what birthday drama?" Blaine wondered. "You knew he's gonna pull this on me and you didn't tell me?" he flicked them, raising on his tip toes to get to Luke's head.

"Ouch, sorry, we forgot about it. " The tall boy said. "Basically, Kurt is a really cool guy except on his birthday or few days before it. He gets all 'Oh I'm gonna grow old and whither and die' and he makes huge drama about it.

"He's 24!" Blaine deadpanned, failing to see how anyone could be upset about being 24.

"You think 24 is bad?" Oliver got closer to him. "A day before his 18th birthday he was so moody and angry that poor Tom tried to make it batter and make him laugh and he said 'I love how your eyes crinkle when you smile", he kept eye contact with Blaine as he let a wide grin spread. "Kurt blew up and accused him of saying how he was old and wrinkled and threw him out of the house."

"Oh my God, no," Blaine laughed. "Are you serious?"

"Hell yeah." James joined in. "He apologized after, of course but we were sure to lock him in the dungeon before his birthday from that day on. I'm sorry we forgot to tell you about it."

"It's ok," Blaine waved it off. He was never really angry, drunk Kurt is fun as hell. "He was actually tolerable, well, apart from sticking his tongue down this girls throat at the bar," Blaine shook his head, still smiling. "He was so cute, he-" Blaine stopped to look out at Kurt on the other side of the room and then blurted out laughing. "He's trying to eat a piece of plastic food." he managed.

Indeed. Kurt was sitting on the sofa, holding a plastic apple and trying to bite it, with this look of utter concentration on his face, then frowning adorably when he failed.

"Kurt sweetie, no," Oliver ran forward and Kurt's head snapped up.

"Apples are rubbish, I hate apples." he threw the thing across the room, and then looked at Oliver as if he saw him for the first time that morning. "Hiiii Oliver," he patted his cheek with huge grin. "Don't tell anyone, but you're my favorite." he whispered, well, tried to whisper and failed miserably.

"Oh yaay, you're my favorite, too," Oliver patted his back.

Kurt smiled again and got up, wobbling on his feet. "Do we have any yogurt? Or CIDER?" he yelled that last word. "I feel like having cider" he strolled into the kitchen.

"Go after him," James gestured when Blaine didn't move for a whole minute.

"What?" Blaine said. "Oh, oh, right. Okay. Come help me," he hissed and dragged them with him into the kitchen only to find Kurt, dancing on the table, shimming around and kicking his feet.

"These boots are made for walking and that's just what they doooo

And one of these days these boots are gonna walk all over youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu" he belted out.

"Oh my God, where's my phone?" Luke was spinning around.

"Are you gonna film me?" Kurt jumped excitedly, a true testament to how drunk he was, and making all 5 boys ran forward to grab him so if he slips he doesn't break his neck.

"Do you want me to film you?" Luke narrowed his eyes at Kurt.

"Erm yeah," Kurt answered him as if he were an idiot. "I'm a star, baby," he spanked his own ass as the boys laughed.

"Whip it out, whip it out," Sean was chanting and Kurt made a pose as if he's about to take his pants off.

"I don't give a...

Keep looking at my...

'Cause it don't mean a thing if you're looking at my...

I'm a do my thing while you're playing with your...

Ha, ha-ha, ha-ha, ha-ha" he shaked his hips as he tried to unbuckle his belt.

James, Oliver, Luke and Sean were dying with laughter at this point.

There he was, their little striper wannabe, dancing to Pussycat Dolls.

"'Cause they only want

Only want my ha, ha-ha

Ha, ha-ha

Only want what they want

But, na, ah-ah

Na, ah-AHA!" Kurt yelled triumphantly "Success" he grined as he took his belt out of the loops and almost fell from the table.

"NO!" Blaine yelled, taking a hold of Kurt's hands. "Come down honey, you're gonna hurt yourself."

"What do you care, you think I'm old," he yanked his hands away from Blaine's grasp. "I don't wanna be pathro… I don't wanna be paroh... "he made a face trying to get the word out, :don't wanna be that word that by you" he informed highly as he left the kitchen.

"Every year," Oliver shook his head.

"Well helloooooooo," they could hear Kurt talking to someone outside and bolted out of the kitchen, panicked.

And they were right to panic. Kurt opened large double doors to the "big enough to fit a pool in" room and went outside, chatting up a paparazzi who was literally camping in front of their house for days now. "How are you sir, I'm Kurt Hummel, nice to meet you," the idiot offered his hand.

"Get back in the house, Kurt." Blaine was the only one to run outside after him. "I'm sorry, he's a bit..." Blaine was trying to find a way to save what left to save. "It's his birthday tomorrow and he's-"

"OLD!" Kurt whined. "You should put that in you paper, sir," he talked to a shocked man. "You should write that I'm old and fugly and that's why my boyfriend won't have sex with me!" he whined, turning to look at Blaine.

Last thing they expected was for the man in front of them to throw his head back and laugh out loud. "Oh man, you've got a handful with this one," he said sympathetically.

"Please, can you please not say anything about tonight, I'll do whatever you want, just don't take any pictures of him, please," Blaine down right begged.

The man just smiled. "I'm here as a substitute for some guy who is literally stalking you. Well, he has to but still. I don't care what you kids do. I'm gonna sit here, read my papers , take a few pictures or you as you walk in and walk out and claim nothing funny happened in there. That boss bitch can bite me."

"You're not gonna write about this?" Blaine was shocked.

"A kid got drunk on his birthday? Big deal. Just cause he's famous doesn't change a fact he's still a kid. And I get paid the same if I get a pictures of him throwing up on the balcony or of you two picking daises." the man said.

"Hey!" Kurt stamped his foot. "I am not a kid, I am old. I have wrinkles, see," Kurt pushed his face all the way into other man's nose, making sure that man will actually "see" his imaginary wrinkles.

"Oh yes, I see them now." he went with it. "I will write about that."

"Yaaaay, I'm gonna be on TV Blaine," Kurt flung himself in Blaine's arms, forgetting how upset and angry he was at him.

"Can you handle this on your own?" the man asked Blaine and Blaine just nodded. "Yeah, I can handle it." he gave man a grateful smile. "Thank you"

The man just waved it off as Blaine dragged a singing Kurt back in the house.

"I love RnR, so put another dime in the jubox baby, I love RnR, so come on take your time and dance with MEEEEEEE!" he sang, making Blaine move his ear away so he doesn't go deaf. "Dance with me, Blaine Anderson," he tried to sound seductive but the slur was a bit overkill.

Blaine just groaned, not really annoyed at all, cause they ALL do stupid things when they get drunk, he wrapped his arms around Kurt's waist. "There's no music he said softly.

"Oh I know, I know, I know!" Kurt chippered. "You can sing."

"Of course I can," Blaine gave up trying to reason and just started singing.

"The world is changing

And time is spinning fast
It's so amazing how you came into my life
I know it seems all hope is gone
I know you feel you can't be strong
And once again the story ends with you and I"

Blaine sang and then spun Kurt a little, making sure not to make him sick. Kurt just giggled like a child as Blaine pulled him back in his arms.

"Hold on

We can make it through the fire

And my love

I'm forever by your side

And you know

If you should ever call my name

I'll be right there

You'll never be alone," Blaine continued to sing in Kurt's ear, holding him tight.

"I'm so in love" Kurt murmured into his neck. "I've never loved anyone the way I love you," he admitted.

Blaine just smiled. "I love you too, baby. How about you sit down so I can get you a glass of water," he said as he gently placed Kurt on the sofa.

He was halfway out as the boys stopped him. "Don't give him anything now. Wait till he lays down and falls asleep, wake him up a couple hours later and give him pills so he doesn't feel like crap tomorrow" James explained.

"You've been through this before, haven't you?" Blaine eyed them suspiciously.

"Same old story every year," Sean rolled his eyes and Kurt's eyes went wide.

"Who's old, are you talking about me?" he pouted and Blaine could swear he's *THIS* close to tears.

"Oh no, no, no sweetie, we're not. You're not old, you're..." Blaine turned to other boys, begging to help him, only to find them snickering.

"Assholes," he hissed under his breath. "You're not old, You're young and hot and sexy and I love you," Blaine talked to him as if he were a child.

"I am old. I'm old and ugly and that's why you won't have sex with me," he whined and the boys behind him resolved in giggles, while Blaine gave them death glares.

"You are not old Kurt, look at you. You're beautiful and ...And...You're smart and you have the pretties lips ever and…" Blaine was struggling then he had an idea.

"And who said I don't want to have sex with you?" walked on his knees over to Kurt. "Why don't you come upstairs with me and I'll do that thing you like, that thing you like the most," he whispered into his ear, making Kurt squeal.

"I like them all," he said, wide eyed. "Which one are you gonna do?" Kurt asked, jumping up and down excitedly.

"Hm..." Blaine hummed. "How about that thing with my tongue, the one that drives you crazy?"

"Wooohooooo. SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEX!" Kurt roared and tried to jump up, key word TRIED but due to his heavy liquored up state he fell down into the cushions and pouted.

"Can we have tongue sex here?" he asked, his eyes hopeful.

4 boys behind them were a mess of limbs at this point, trying to hide their smiles.

"How about if I help you get upstairs, huh? There's a big bed there, lots of room to do tongue stuff," Blaine urged him on.

"Oh yaaaay, seeeeeex," Kurt made grabby hands as Blaine got up to help Kurt up. "You're really hot."

He managed to drag him upstairs and into the room. The second they were in Kurt was kicking off his shoes and unbuttoning his shirt at the same time, which would be a task even if he were sober.

"Let me help you with that," Blaine winked at him and unbuttoned his shirt first and then took of his pants. Kurt was just grinning all the time, he had no idea where he was, pour soul. When he was just in his boxers Blaine pushed him gently onto the pillows, kissing him just once, shortly.

"Oh, I have an idea," he pretended he actually just came up with it.

"You do?" Kurt was shocked; as if he couldn't believe anyone in the history of ever, ever had an idea.

"Aham," Blaine hummed. "How about you wait for me while I go downstairs and get some chocolate syrup," he said, biting Kurt's lip.

"Oooh, for tongue sex?" Kurt was beaming at him.

"Of course," Blaine nodded.

"Yaaay, go, hurry." Kurt was making "shoo" motions with his hands.

"Don't go anywhere, just lay down and I'll be back before you know it, okay?" Blaine said.

Kurt just nodded excitedly as Blaine got up and walked out of the door.

The second he was out he let a huge smile spread across his face. Kurt was so adorable, even as a drunk. He was also dead on his feet and he'll need a lot of those vitamins and painkillers the boys use to get through tomorrow. So he went downstairs and got some, together with a glass of water. He returned not 5 minutes later to find Kurt sound asleep, just as he expected. He smiled at the sleeping boy and took of his clothes, too.

He gently placed a blanket over Kurt, careful not to wake him up and snuggled behind him, wrapping his arms around Kurt's sleeping body. He kissed his neck tenderly.

"I don't think you're old." He said into the empty room. "But I would love for you to grow old with me," he said with another kiss to Kurt's skin.

He was not afraid to dream big.

Finito :)

Do you likey drunk Kurt? :)

P.S. Can I like skip 10 drabbles and have them get married? :))))

I can totally see Blaine at Gramdpa Pedro's hacienda, down by the creek, holding up a ring and those four idiots behind him, grining like morons they are, each holding up a sign that says : WILL . YOU. MARRY. US.

Not me, us :)

Okay, I'm saying crap now, sorry. :)