Beat with a Schtick

How did Bloo start out his day? Why, imitating some of the residents of Foster's and cracking wise jokes of course; it ranged from uncanny impressions to heartless jokes. And even though the others couldn't help but burst out laughing at his impression of Mabel Licorice, he was truly challenging Bella to see how long she can go without laughing or smiling.

"That is dead-on!" Yogi Boo-Boo commented with a chuckle while pointing at Bloo and Mabel to make everyone laugh harder, "They look identical!"

But when Bella only gave him a deadpanned look, Bloo reverted to pulling out a monocle and Sunset Junction's fuzzy top hat and put them on.

"Order, order! Stop all your fun-having at once! I have something useless and boring to say!" Bloo mocked with his best Mr. Herriman impression.

"Mr. Herriman's monocle? How did you get it?" Yogi Boo-Boo asked in amazement.

"A pro never reveals his secrets," Bloo boasted and puffed out his chest.

"He snagged it off his nightstand while he was sleeping," Bella added dryly.

"Why I never!" Bloo snapped with his English accent.

"Your comedy entertains us! Please, continue!" Yogi Boo-Boo pleaded while jumping and clapping in excitement.

"What's the worst thing about dinosaurs that don't shower?" Bloo asked a nearby dinosaur imaginary friend.

"What?" the dinosaur asked.

"They ex-stinked!" Laughter filled the room again, and even the dinosaur couldn't help but giggle.

Bloo then aimed another joke at an imaginary friend in the shape of a pointy nose, "I don't wanna be nosy, but…"

The laughter grew, but Bella still didn't crack a smile. So, Bloo grabbed her and pulled her over to two-in-one imaginary friends wearing a large pair of pants.

"Tell me, Bella, who's wearing the pants in this relationship?" Bloo joked with a grin, making the two-in-one friends chortle.

"There's no relationship," Bella quickly denied, blushing and pushing Bloo away.

"Denial is the clincher," Bloo sang, but felt it was best to just keep being funny; he did so by throwing a snippy joke at Scissors and a "Head always in the clouds" joke at a cloud imaginary friend.

But out of nowhere, a giant, beastie imaginary friend with sharp teeth, claws and demonic red eyes came stomping through the room. And this gave Bloo another idea for a good joke.

"New Guy, how's the weather up there?" The Blob crossed his arms and smiled victoriously, but everyone else immediately went silent and ran away. Bloo didn't even realize the danger until the giant stopped and turned, grabbing him and nearly squeezing the life out of him while lifting the blob up to his snarling face.

Meanwhile, the chain between them pulled poor Bella along, but she was so scared that her fur stood up and she dug her claws into the floor, leaving long scratch marks in the carpet as she stayed flat on the floor.

"You think you're pretty funny, huh?" the New Guy asked, his voice deep and powerful.

"That's what my friends tell me," Bloo replied nonchalantly, but he was blind to the obvious face of death before him.

"Ok then, Mr. Funny Man, how 'bout I give you something ta laugh about?"

Bloo rolled his eyes, "We goin' somewhere with this?"

"Yeah—outside, the two of us, three-thirty!"

"Ya know, four would work much better for me," Bloo pointed out while looking at his schedule.

"Fine, then. Four o'clock it is," the New Guy groaned in annoyance, "When I'm through with you, you're gonna have funny all over your face!"

With that, the monster dropped Bloo and stomped away, and the said blob came crashing down onto Bella, snapping her out of her frozen state.

"Yeah? Well, when I'm through with you…you're gonna be the one with…stuff…on you!" Bloo shouted back in anger, but his confidence was easily taken away when Bella didn't hesitate to slap his face.

"What is wrong with you?!" Bella exclaimed, "If he succeeds, I'm gonna be draggin' a dead idiot around for the rest of my life!"

Meanwhile, Yogi Boo-Boo sprinted down the hall to inform the rest of the house's resident's of Bloo's fight with the New Guy, to which he soon came up to a cow boy-like imaginary friend.

"Oooh, there was once laughter in my heart, now only fear resides," Yogi Boo-Boo informed shakily.

"Come again?" the cow bow friend asked in confusion.

"Bloo and the New Guy are gonna face off at four o'clock!"

The tiny orange puffball the lived under the cow boy's hat suddenly popped up, shock written on his face, "Bloo and the New Guy are gonna face off at four o'clock?!"

"Relax, Fellas, it's no biggie," Bloo reassured nonchalantly while drinking out of a coconut with a tiny umbrella, and tried to pull off a cooler look with sunglasses, "I get called out all the time. Bullies, criminals, old ladies, they all want some a' this."

"Some of your money, at least," Bella muttered under her breath.

"This is no laughing matter," Yogi Boo-Boo firmly pointed out.

Bloo shrugged before taking another sip, "Who's laughing?"

"Seriously, this guy's no joke. I heard he was born in some deranged, loony town," the cow boy added in fear.

"Created by some deranged loony," the little orange ball pointed out.

"And that he is, in fact, loony and deranged as well," Yogi Boo-Boo went on.

"Gee, we never would've guessed from the intense, red glare and the twitching fists," Bella stated sarcastically.

Bloo only scoffed at that, urging Yogi Boo-Boo to warn him of him impending doom even more, "I heard he likes to take his time, likes to drag things out."

"And I heard you're boring—me," Bloo quickly cut them off before they could keep rambling, "Look, you guys are like soft, delicate flowers, and that's cool. But me, I'm tough and gritty, like a tough and gritty flower that grew up in the streets."

"And the flowers that grow up in the streets get crushed by weeds and boots," Bella growled at the blob in annoyance, "And trust me, this is one big boot."

"Typical of you to worry so much about me, and I appreciate it," Bloo added with a triumphant smirk, to which Bella's glare grew colder but remained ignored, "The point is, Blooregard Q. Kazoo ain't scared of nothin' or nobody, especially not some overgrown, under-brain, muscle-bound, lunkhead, fur ball-."

Just before Bloo could finish that sentence, a shrill scream echoed throughout the house, and they all turned to realize that the New Guy's room was just down the hall. An imaginary friend came running out of his room in terror while still screaming, and didn't dare to look back.

"Make it stop! Make it stop!" he exclaimed.

"Come back here! I'm not finished with you yet!" the New Guy boomed as he sprinted after him, effortlessly catching up with his much larger stride. Yogi Boo-Boo and the cow boy ran off while Bloo and Bella went in the other direction. Bella tried to ran past the New Guy's room to find a better, less conspicuous place to hide, but she was yanked inside when Bloo suddenly darted right in out of a blind panic.

The room was as large, dark and intimidating as the New Guy himself; the bed was huge and contained giant spikes, there were numerous metal traps and weapons scattered about, and the room was made of cold stone.

"Are you kidding me?! This is the last place we should be hiding from him!" Bella whisper-shouted.

"Actually, the best place to hide from a killer is right under their nose," Bloo protested with a hiss before grabbing Bella and dragged her underneath the bed. But when they snuck under the old blankets, they both ran into something large and soft.

"Eduardo?" Bloo gasped in surprise.

"What're you doing here?" Bella questioned softly.

"Hiding from the New Guy," Eduardo replied.

"So are we," Bloo added in obvious fear.

"Oh, now you're scared of him?" Bella asked with aggravation.

"I heard one time, he tried to leave a guy in stitches."

"I heard that he is, in fact, loony and deranged as well. He likes to take his time, likes to-."

"This is all well and educational, but we've gotta-," Bella tried to warn them, but her voice as cut up between each word with a thunderous stomp.

"Keep…"

STOMP

"It…"

STOMP

"…D-Down."

STOMP

"Don't worry, you guys. I heard the best place to hide from a killer is right under their noses," Eduardo reassured, his voice barely over a whisper.

"Ha! Told you!" Bloo laughed mockingly at Bella while pointing at her, but he hadn't realized his mistake until it was far too late. The New Guy soon lifted his bed and tossed it away with ease, glaring down at the three smaller imaginary friends with a hateful scowl.

They remained frozen under his gaze for a moment until Bloo eventually came up with an idea that would save them—well, most of them…

"Uh…Eduardo, we found you!" the blob exclaimed while flashing a coy smile up at the New Guy, hoping it would fool him.

"Que?"

"What?"

Both Eduardo and Bella were quite perplexed, and they flashed Bloo equally dumbfounded expressions.

"Yup, we found you. Remember? We were playing Hide and Seek," Bloo slowly urged through clenched teeth while elbowing them.

"Uh, no, we weren't," Bella simply stated with a shake of her head.

"Azul, we weren't playing Hide and-."

It only took them a moment to realize what Bloo meant, as the said blob nervously glanced up at the New Guy with wide eyes. And they instantly knew that there only chance of getting out of this now would be to play along.

"Oh, ha-ha! Right! Hide and Seek!" Eduardo laughed hysterically.

"Yeah, now I remember!" Bella chuckled sheepishly.

"Great! And now, you're It, Ed, so it's your turn to find us!" Bloo quickly added as the three of them slowly but surely made their way to the door.

"Oh, I'm It! It is my turn to find you!" Eduardo thoroughly explained.

"Yes, thank you for explaining the simpleton rules for simpletons," Bella dramatically stated, not knowing where else to go with it.

"So, you just stay here, and count to ten a couple hundred times while we go find a place to hide—for the rest of our lives," Bloo added as he and Bella slowly backed out, and muttered the last part under his breath as soon as they were out of the room and sprinted away.

Poor Eduardo knew he wouldn't stand a chance if he tried to outrun the New Guy, so he shakily turned around and began counting in Spanish, all while the even bigger monster before him smiled maniacally down at him. And soon enough, Eduardo found himself trapped inside when the door suddenly closed.

Meanwhile, the blob and the fox ran for their lives down the hall, as their eyes darted back and forth for a good hiding place.

"A plant! It's perfect!" Bloo exclaimed hysterically when he spotted a potted plant, to which he and Bella dive-bombed into it.

But not a moment later, Jackie Khones came walking by with a pep in his step and greeted, "Hey, Guys!"

"What the-? How did he know we were in here?" Bella was the first to asked and pop her head out.

"Forget the plant! Let's try Chester's hat!" Bloo quickly stated after squeezing himself out, and Bella followed soon after and darted underneath careless Chester's cowboy hat.

"No one'll ever suspect a thing," Bloo whispered boastfully.

"Right, because no one ever gets suspicious when the two of us hide in a dark place," Bloo added sarcastically wit a roll of her eyes. But as if she jinxed it, the tiny orange counterpart that lived in Chester's hat switched on a light and glared at the two imaginary friends, and kicked them out seconds after. But as they were sent flying through the air, they soon noticed the full laundry basket that Cy was carrying to a nearby laundry chute.

"Bella, aim for the laundry basket!" Bloo shouted as he grabbed onto Bella's back.

"You don't need ta tell me twice," Bella muttered while unfolding her tail, creating a hang-glider for them to descend safely into the laundry basket, right before Cy unloaded the dirty laundry into the chute. The two plummeted down the dark chute and eventually landed in a trolley already full of dirty laundry, and they poked their heads out to find themselves in the laundry room.

"The laundry chute, of course! Why didn't I think of that?" Bloo questioned.

"Because that's out of character for you," Bella simply pointed out. Soon after, the door handle startled jiggling and the two were instantly sent into a panic, assuming it was the New Guy. Bloo quickly pushed down on Bella's head to hide, and covered his eyes as his teeth shattered. Footsteps could be heard approaching before the laundry pile shifted, and they heard the door of a washing machine open and close.

"Wait a minute…I smell fabric softener," Bella concluded after sniffing their air, right before the washing machine they were in began filling with water. They realized they were trapped as the machine started spinning to begin washing, so they did the only thing they could do: Scream in utter terror for fear of drowning.

Luckily, one person heard their cries, given that he was the one who put them and the laundry in their in the first place. Wilt turned in confusion towards the noise, and gasped when he realized it was his friends; he then sprinted towards the washing machine and ripped the door open, spilling the water, laundry and the two imaginary friends.

"M-My…eyes…it burns…" Bella quivered in great pain, as her eyes turned red from the chemicals and her fur and feathers drooped from the water.

"Wilt!" Bloo exclaimed after spitting out water.

"Sorry!" Wilt quickly apologized, fearing he had traumatized them both for life.

"What were you thinking?!"

"Sorry!"

"You really scared us!"

"Sorry!"

"Now, hide us back in here before he finds us and we get squashed."

"So-!" Wilt paused and shook hi head in great confusion. "Say, what?"

"Just hide us…in here…before we…get squashed…" Bella explained with a shiver before shaking off the soap and water.

"You really take your hide and seek seriously," Wilt admitted.

"We're not playing hide and seek. We're playing hide-and-don't-get-our-faces-pulverized!" Bloo snapped.

"I don't know that game," Wilt pointed out with a shrug.

"The big, scary new guy wants to punch his face in at four o'clock," Bella informed.

"Apparently, I said something that offended him," Bloo added while rolling his eyes.

"Apparently?" Bella repeated with a deadpanned look.

"What did you say?" Wilt inquired.

"Nothing," Bloo replied with a shake of his head, but Wilt only gave him a look of disbelief, "A bunch of us were just being silly and the New Guy walks in and he's really tall, so I said 'how's the weather up there'?"

It only took a second for Bella to realize what Bloo had just said, and her eyes went wide when she saw the disapproving expression on Wilt's face while placing a hand on his hip.

"Um, Bloo…" she began softly.

"It was just a little joke," Bloo protested.

"Bloo, seriously, take a second to look at who you're talking to…"

"Just a little joke?" Wilt parroted with a scowl.

"Yeah."

"Bloo…"

"Just a little joke?!" he repeated louder, "Well, I'm not laughing!"

"Must've gone over your head," Bloo simply stated.

"Seriously?!" Bella snapped in disbelief.

"Over my head? What, is that another one of your so-called jokes?" Wilt growled while leaning down to poke Bloo in the chest.

But Bloo merely rolled his eyes and pushed his hand away, "I don't see what the big, tall deal is."

"I give up," Bella stated and crossed her arms.

"Of course you don't, no one ever does! 'How's the weather up there'? Well, how's the weather down there?" Wilt mocked in hopes of giving the blob a taste of his own medicine.

"Partly cloudy, twenty percent chance of-." Despite being so confident in what he was saying, Bloo quickly shook and head when he realized the irony he was led into. "Ya know, this isn't helping. Just shut the door, and put it on gentle."

"Oh, no. I am not helping you out. I, for one, applaud the New Guy because you're getting exactly what you deserve," Wilt argued and wagged a firm finger.

"A racecar bed?! I'm finally getting a racecar bed?!" Bloo shouted in pure excitement.

"Since when have you ever wanted a racecar bed?" Bella questioned flatly.

"Since earlier today."

"No, you're getting your just desserts," Wilt corrected, but Bloo only smiled obviously, "A taste of your own medicine."

"Is it bubblegum flavor?" Bloo asked sweetly.

"How are you this oblivious?!" Bella hissed with great frustration.

"No, Bloo, but you're gonna take it anyways! Your days of insensitivity towards us non-smalls are over—when the clock strikes four!" Wilt boomed while painting at the clock above the doorway.

"Oh, yeah? Not if we strike first. You got your smashing shoes on, Bella?" Bloo asked with a conniving grin.

"I don't wear shoes, and neither do you. But I don't deserve any part of this, so I'm up for anything to stop it. What's the plan?" Bella inquired with a quirked brow.

The softly ticking clocks in Foster's Home didn't last much longer once Bloo and Bella got a hold of a couple of large mallets; the two immediately went to work on destroying every single clock that dared to tick. But just as they were finishing up, they were caught when Frankie walked into the room with wide eyes and mouth agape.

"What are you doing?!" she snapped.

"Nothing," Bloo answered innocently before going back to repeatedly smashing a clock.

"I know you two didn't destroy all these clocks," Frankie stated matter-of-factly, but had a hard time believing it.

"But we did," Bloo protested with a smirk, "All the clocks in the whole house!"

"Well, why would you do that?!" Frankie screeched with rage.

"We had no other choice! It was the only way to prevent no-filter here from being pile-drived to the center of the Earth," Bella pointed out while referring to Bloo.

"It's true! These lily-livered creampuffs are tryin' to avoid a crashing date with destiny!" Madame Foster shouted with excitement.

"Wait, why are you including me? I didn't do anything wrong!" Bella argued with wide eyes.

"Simple, you're his legacy writer," Madame Foster simply stated, "And as we all know, time stops for no man."

"W-What about imaginary friends? Does it stop for imaginary friends?" Bloo shakily asked with high hopes.

"Not on my watch. Bring 'er in, Girl!" Upon Madame Foster's call, Coco happily strolled in with a giant panel of multiple different clock types strapped to her back. The size of the countdown was rather overwhelming, as Bella and Bloo were left utterly speechless.

"Looks like you've got exactly three hours, four minutes and thirty five seconds until your little showdown," Madame Foster informed as the clocks continued to beep. But the two didn't give up yet, as they screamed at the top of their lungs and lunged at the clocks with mallets in hand. But as soon as their large hammers landed on the glass, the momentum was sent back through them and sent them shaking back like jell-o.

"Oh, ho! That's Plexiglass, Dearies. There's no breakin' that," Madame Foster laughed in great amusement at their futile attempt, "When four o'clock comes around, everyone's gonna know it."

"Great," Bloo sighed in defeat, as he and Bella threw their mallets away.

"Now, let's see what'cha got," Madame Foster began firmly while Coco stepped up with a calculator, ready to type in their odds as Madame Foster examined them over, "Mm-hmm, could use a little work…whites are pearly…"

"Pweashe shtop," Bloo and Bella seethed through clenched teeth when the old woman held their lips apart to check their teeth.

"Belly achin'…knees shakin'…uh-huh…" Madame Foster continued with a nod.

"You have knees?" Bella asked in surprise.

"Like you didn't know," Bloo stated grimly.

"Just as I suspected!" Madame Foster concluded after Coco finished her calculations, and she tore off the printed paper to read over their odds of winning, "Ok, according to our calculations, you have a one in a quadrillion chance…"

"Of getting a racecar bed?!" Bloo shouted with excitement.

"Of lastin' thirty seconds with the New Guy," Madame Foster scoffed.

"Oh, him again," Bloo sighed sorrowfully.

"And that's being generous. But if you make it past thirty, to, say, thirty one seconds, that's just one itty-bitty, extra second—that mama gets paid!" Madame Foster laughed manically.

"You're betting?!" Bella called in shock.

"On us?!" Bloo added with wide eyes and a slack jaw.

"Oh, no. Mostly against you, but I'm trying to cover my basis," Madame Foster admitted, but then Eduardo hobbled in; his fur was matted and torn, and his face was covered with bruises and scratches.

"That ain't pretty," Madame foster couldn't help but comment.

"U-Uh…hi, Eduardo…you found us," Bloo pointed out shakily.

"Si, I found you. And now, you're It. The New Guy was just warming up on me," Eduardo growled while pointing at them menacingly before limping off to tend to his wounds.

Growing more and more desperate, Bloo and Bella were soon pacing up and down the halls, just trying to come up with a plan to avoid the New Guy.

"Gotta think, gotta think, gotta think…" Bloo muttered incoherently.

"Think of what? Just admit it, you're dead and everyone's gonna look to me for pathetic stories about you!" Bella huffed while crossing her arms.

"Pathetic?" Bloo parroted with a quirked brow. But the two nearly jumped out of their skin when they heard thumping noises approaching. They instantly jumped behind a large potted plant, but peaked their heads out to find that it was just Mr. Herriman…as he ran into a wall.

"When I get my hands on the thieving wretch who stole my monocle, I will deliver the most devastating of disciplinary actions: Expulsion!" Mr. Herriman growled and felt his way around, albeit clumsily, to avoid running into anything else.

"Expulsion, eh?" Bloo pondered aloud while grabbing out Mr. Herriman's monocle and placing over his own eye, but then the said rabbit accidentally tripped over a table with a lamp and landed awkwardly.

"Can't we at least get the guy a body cast?" Bella suggested out of pity.

After they let go of their remorse for Mr. Herriman, Bloo and Bella hid in a another conveniently placed potted plant outside of the New Guy's room, and waited for him to leave and lock the door.

"Hey, Guys," Jackie Khones greeted cheerfully while walking by once more.

"I swear, he's clairvoyant or something!" Bella hissed in aggravation.

"Nevermind that, c'mon," Bloo argued while pulling her out and beginning to slide the monocle under the door, "When Herriman finds his monocle in your room, it's hasta la dios."

"Actually, the saying is 'hasta la vista, baby'. Haven't you ever seen Terminator?" Bella asked while lowering her voice to that of a gruff man, and even used a strong Austrian accent.

"Ter-what?" Bloo asked in great curiosity, but he failed to notice Mr. Herriman approaching from behind, so he was easily tripped over while the monocle miraculously landed back on his face.

"Watch where you're going!" Mr. Herriman huffed while dusting himself off.

"Sorry," Bloo quickly apologized, as Bella helped him back up.

"And furthermore…u-um…" Mr. Herriman was about to continue his scolding when he saw something quite familiar on Bloo's left eye, so he squinted and leaned down to get a better look. Once they realized they were caught, Bella and Bloo's mouths stretched into huge nervous smiles.

Herriman didn't think twice before dragging them both to his office, and he ironically began whacking a bopping desk toy with a baton, and it shared a striking resemblance with Bloo. And weather or not Herriman cared, he didn't stop at Bloo's heart rate raised and his skin became sweaty with terror.

"I assure you both, this mistake will be your last—at least, in this house," Mr. Herriman growled threateningly while standing from his chair.

"Please, Mr. Herriman, we can explain!" Bloo pleaded.

"There's nothing to explain! It was all his fault!" Bella snapped without a second thought.

"Gee, thanks for the help!" Bloo shouted in annoyance.

"It's better than lying in your final moments!" Bella shouted back.

"Enough! Let me explain something to you!" Mr. Herriman cut in firmly and presented an expulsion form before them, "You are both receiving the swift, proverbial boot. And never shall you return. Not now, not, say, four o'clock this afternoon, not ever!"

"But-!" Bloo tried to go on again about their innocence, but quickly paused when he realized what Herriman said, "Did you say four o'clock this afternoon?"

"Nor three, nor five, nor eleven twenty-two," Herriman added rhythmically.

"Is that so?" Bloo and Bella asked in unison, all while sharing looks of a brilliant plan.

"As long as I can prove to Madame Foster the transgression warrants it."

"You might wanna build up your case a bit," Bloo stated and snatched the form from Mr. Herriman, grabbed a pen and began writing down some more incidents, "C'mon, let's spice things up, like we did last week at taco night."

"That was you? I thought Jolly Buttons-!" Herriman gasped in shock.

"Nope. Us. We just framed Jolly," Bella cut him off.

"We had him deported," Herriman pointed out shakily.

"I know. He still sends us postcards," Bloo added while handing Mr. Herriman a postcard, which read 'I will get you!' in cutout magazine letters.

"And let's not forget the dawn of a thousand lawn mowers," Bella quickly added.

"The eve of two thousand water balloons," Bloo couldn't help but inform.

"Don't forget the two hours ago of us breaking every clock in the house."

"And to top it all off, I'm getting into a fight this afternoon."

"A fight?! That's a direct violation of house charter! There's no overlooking that!" Herriman gasped and crossed his arms in anger.

"Yup. Me and the New Guy. One-on-one," Bloo added with a grin.

Mr. Herriman's eyes popped wide in realization, "The New Guy? Y-You mean that vicious, gargantuan bone-crusher?"

"U-Uh, that's the one, so why don't we get this paperwork signed and we'll be on our way," Bella uttered nervously, fearing that Mr. Herriman may be reconsidering expelling them.

"That is no fight! You'll be absolutely destroy-! I-I mean…" Herriman began before catching himself, "Er, uh…that is no fight."

"Come again?" Bloo asked meekly.

"That is not a fight. That is a…a gentlemen's challenge! Perfectly acceptable. It would be unjust of me to punish you for it," Mr. Herriman argued and yanked the form away.

"No! It would be very just. Very just!" Bloo begged.

But his pleads fell upon deaf ears when Mr. Herriman ripped up the form, "I will hear no more about it. This is a matter of honor, and you must face the devastating, debilitating onslaught of your far-superior challenger with dignity and grace."

"Have you not been paying attention?! He's never had either of those things!" Bella cried out of terror.

"What you do have is…" Mr. Herriman paused to peak outside of his office, and check the Madame Foster's clocks sitting in the foyer. "Precisely one hour and fourteen minutes before—well, let's just say you have an hour and fourteen minutes left."

As Mr. Herriman chuckled darkly at the thought of finally getting rid of rascals like Bloo and Bella, the latter quivered while exchanging glances of pure fear.

Once he finally came to terms with the danger he was in, Bloo was frozen in a panicked state out in the foyer, where an imaginary friend with the exact same frozen face of terror walked through. And their similarities instantly caught Yogi Boo-Boo's attention.

"Hoo-hoo! That is dead-on!" he laughed uncontrollably, despite the merciless brawl that was fast approaching.

"Hey, Guys!" Mac greeted cheerfully, as he walked through the front door.

"I will sincerely miss your comedic hi-jinks," Yogi Boo-Boo meekly pointed out before leaving.

"What was that all about?" Mac questioned.

"Oh, n-nothing," Bloo denied shakily, "Just insulted the scariest, most terrifying monster the world has ever known, and now, he wants to pile-drive me until I am no more, that's all!"

"Whoa, calm down! You're all freaked out," Mac tried to comfort his now hyperventilating imaginary friend.

"That's because the scariest, most terrifying monster the world has ever known wants to pile-drive him until he is no more!" Bella exclaimed and began quivering uncontrollably as well.

"Relax, I'm sure it's not that bad. Just tell me what you did," Mac demanded reassuringly.

"I asked that guy 'how's the weather…up there?!'" Bloo began timidly, but then glanced up to find the New Guy standing right behind Mac, so he dove under Bella's tail for protection.

"Still think you're Mister Funny Guy, huh?" the New Guy growled in annoyance. Once Mac followed Bloo and Bella's gaze and turned around, he flinched and screamed with just as much fear, "I'll be outside, getting ready!"

With that final statement, the New Guy clenched a intensely-shaking fist above them before parading loudly to the backyard.

"That's the scariest, most terrifying monster I've ever seen!" Mac screeched with realization.

"Now you understand the deep doo-doo we're in?!" Bella cried.

"What're we gonna do?!" Bloo asked while flailing his arms around.

"I'll tell you what you're gonna do. You're gonna run, run far away from here!" Mac quickly instructed.

"But I don't like running," Bloo whined with a slouch.

"It's either that, or live with a bully hanging over your head for the rest of your life. The Morning Rise n' Shiner, the Nightly Beat n' Greet. And if your bully if half the bully my bully is, you'll be spending your time in between, face-down in a pile of sweaty socks," Mac ranted on.

"That's it! If my bully is half the bully your bully is, that must mean your bully is…" Bloo gasped with realization, but paused to do the math in his head, "…a bigger bully than my bully!"

"So?" Mac asked with a quirked brow.

"So, we're gonna fight fire with fire," Bella replied once she got the idea.

Against Mac's wishes, they fetched his diabolical older brother, Terrance, who was only up for helping them with a little negotiation.

"Ok, now lemme get this straight: I get five atomic wedgies, ten super noogies, three sonic loogies," Terrance repeated with a huge grin on his face.

"And one additional atomic-super-sonic variety of your choosing, all tattle-free, of course," Bloo calmly went on.

"And?" Terrance pressed while placing his hands on his hips.

"And I will forever address you as 'Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants Better than Mac'," Mac groaned.

Terrance's grin grew larger, "Keep going!"

Mac merely deadpanned, "For I am a lowly pile of booger-brains. Please, let me bow down before you, O great ruler of Terrance-ania!"

"And a wise, just ruler he is," Bella added sarcastically, but Terrance luckily failed to notice her sarcasm.

"Ha-ha, cool! Ok, I'll take care of your stupid imaginary bully," Terrance agreed and punched his palm in confidence.

"Really? 'Cause if you're not sure, we can sweeten the deal. How 'bout a couple extra noogies?" Bloo quickly suggested, to which Bella and Mac's jaws dropped from his desperation.

"Bloo, he said he'd do it!" Mac snapped.

"Yeah, never look a gift horse in the mouth, you sicko!" Bella hissed.

"Or what about this t-shirt? We can make him wear this t-shirt I made!" Bloo added, as he seemed to have completely ignored his friends' wishes.

"'Mac Like-A The Potty'?" Mac read the white words on the pink shirt aloud in disgust, "No way!"

"Well then, maybe I should reconsider," Terrance pondered and crossed his arms.

"I take it back! Stick your head in the horse's mouth, Mac, please!" Bella begged while clasping her paws together like a begging cat.

"And we're not talking about your life on the line here, we're talking about mine! So, if you won't do it for me, would you just do it—for me?" Bloo pleaded with tears welling up in his eyes.

"Fine—but you owe me big," Mac hissed like there was poison on his tongue.

"Phew, thanks," Bella breathed a sigh of relief.

"Oh, and don't forget these. Kind of an ensemble," Bloo added while forcefully slipping on a baby bonnet on Mac's head, as well as stuffing a binky into his mouth.

Once they were sure they had Terrance's support, they returned to Foster's help the said teenager prepare for the fight; Bloo even stood on his back while he did push-ups, and Bella counted and timed each one.

"Alright, the bully's right out back," Mac informed, all while wearing the silly outfit that Bloo gave him.

"Got it! I'll be back here before you can say…uh…I-I'll be back here in a minute, so don't go anywhere, Lil' Bro! Supreme King Awesome Thunderpants has a special afternoon planned for ya," Terrance explained firmly before running out with maniacal laughter.

"That bully is so toast," Bloo stated with a grin.

"You got that right," Mac chuckled before the three of them shared victorious high-fives. But a mere second after they proclaimed their victory, Terrance's spine-tingling screams could be heard from outside; soon after, he came sprinting in with a horrified look on his face and his arms clutched tightly around his stomach.

"H-Horrible…it was horrible…horrible!" Terrance gasped for breath while crawling towards them, and it wasn't long before he stood back up and darted out of the house.

It was at this moment that Bloo and Bella realized there was only one other way of escaping the inevitable doom of the fight, so they packed up their things and ran out of the house while Mac called after them to run far away. But as soon as they reached the curb, they were completely clueless as to where to go next.

"Heading somewhere, little ones?" a lady asked softly as she walked by.

"Just as soon as we find a place to go," Bloo sadly answered.

"Anywhere but Texas. Too many squirrels," Bella pointed out flatly.

"Well, lucky for you, I know the perfect place," the woman informed.

"Really?" Bloo and Bella asked with high hopes, only to be thrown back through the front doors of Foster's.

"Welcome back," Mr. Herriman greeted with a cruel and ironic tone, as he closed the door behind him. On the other side of the foyer, Madame Foster had set up a giant chalkboard to count all bets on the New Guy and Bloo; so far, the New Guy was gaining everyone's bet while Bloo didn't get one.

"What're you doing here?!" Mac exclaimed when he realized his best friends were back.

"He's here for his gentlemen's challenge, and she's here to document his final moments. Ah, just in time!" Mr. Herriman chuckled darkly when Madame Foster's indestructible clocks finally sounded, alerting everyone of Bloo's doom.

Mr. Herriman was quick to catch them before they ran off, and kicked them both outside, but Bella refused to get any closer and stayed right outside the backdoor.

"Glad you could make it," the New Guy huffed while effortlessly towering over Bloo; everyone else remained silent and inside the house, as they gathered at the windows to watch the carnage.

"Let's just get this over with," Bloo sighed in defeat.

"Alright then, I got one questioned fer you—what's blue and red all over?" With that, the New Guy revealed a gargantuan mallet, and raised it above his head to prepare for what was obviously about to come. Bloo was frozen solid as his eyes widened and his jaw went slack. As soon as the mallet began to drop, both Bloo and Bella shielded their eyes with their arms. And then came a big, loud…

SPLAT

Instead of being covered with the juices of his own insides like he expected, Bloo only felt a luke-warm liquid all over his body. Bella didn't know why, but she felt compelled to look upon the corpse of her friend…except, he wasn't dead. He was covered in something red, of course, but he was still in one piece.

"What the-?" she pondered aloud as she approached, and took a whiff of the strange fluids, "It's just watermelon—and it's not even ripe."

Taking another look around them, Bloo and Bella finally noticed the green and red chunks of the said fruit that now littered the yard and the New Guy's mallet.

"You! Get it? 'Cause you're blue and red all over…'cause you're blue and covered in watermelon, which is red. Pretty funny, huh?" the New Guy hastily explained the joke, as his once terrifying scowl was now replaced with a joyful smile.

"F-Funny?" Bloo repeated, his voice still weak from the shock.

"Yeah! I told you I'd give ya somethin' ta laugh about," the New Guy pointed out.

"B-But I thought…y-you don't wanna…so, wait, you don't wanna squash me?" Bloo fumbled over his words.

"Sure I do," the New Guy replied before placing a bear trap before them, and place a squash plant right in its jaws, causing it to snap and cover them in its juices.

"And berry ya, too!" Without warning, they were suddenly buried in a pile of leaky blueberries.

"Great, now I'll be sticky for a week!" Bella complained after climbing out the fruity pile.

"It's all part of my act. I'm a prop comic," the New Guy went on.

"Prop comic?" Bloo parroted.

"Yeah! Pretty grape, huh?" The New Guy then took a bunch of grapes, and smashed them between his fists, causing it to rain purple grape juice on them.

"I think there's a certain skeleton you should really get in touch with," Bella couldn't help but joke.

"But all those other guys! Wheelie, Ed, Terrance?" Bloo quickly added.

"Were just practice. I had to work on my material before I showed it to you I mean, I'm just an amateur. And you're, like, the funniest friends in the whole house!"

"Get out," Bloo protested dramatically, but secretly appreciated the attention.

"'How's the weather up there'? That's classic! That's the best joke I've ever heard!" the New Guy laughed.

"Glad to see our reputation precedes us," Bloo boasted.

"But just so we're clear, you don't want to pile-drive him until he is no more?" Bella stated firmly.

"Pile-drive you? No! I just wanna get your opinion on my act—if that's ok."

"It would be our pleasure," Bloo answered for the both of them.

The New Guy nodded in conformation, and pulled out a lemon slice and a spoon; he then put on a dry expression before driving the spoon into the lemon, causing it to squirt into his eyes and cause him temporary agony.

"Ta-da! So, what'd ya think?" the New Guy asked once he was done screaming and stomping the ground in pain.

"Eh, kinda lame," Bloo commented without thinking twice, to which Bella immediately sprinted away before the New Guy's fist smashing him flatter than a pancake.

"Bet you wish you didn't have knees now," Bella joked dryly.

This. Chapter. Took. Forever!

I tell ya, it's not gonna get any easier from here, Guys. Oh, and a few things I'd like to point out because of the whole copyright thing.

One: No copyright infringement intended. Two: I do not own the rights for Foster's Home for Imaginary Friends. And three: Under Section 107 of the Copyright Act of 1976, allowance is made for "fair use" for purposes such as criticism, comment, news reporting, teaching, scholarship, and research. Fair use is a use permitted by copyright statute that might otherwise be infringing. Non-profit, educational or personal use tips the balance in favor of fair use.

Just thought I'd point that out 'cause I don't want the law on my butt.(and just to be safe, I may start pasting all that in future chapters)

Until the next chapter, I'm TRikiD, bye-bye!