Dumbledore got off of Aragog and approached the Hogwarts entrance menacingly, and conjured up a gold microphone. "Surrender Davis or I will destroy this whole school! Dumbledore belched. " I will give you 2 hours 23 minutes and 13 seconds to present yourself in front of me!" Dumbledore went on to wheeze in the microphone.
Susan Davis was beating up another gay kid, she had cut off his right hand for that was the hand used in holding another boys hand. She put him on a meat hook and was preparing to rip his hair off with duct tape, but before she could, she heard Dumbledores message. Susan looked out her window and saw hundreds of spiders and centaurs. She wasn't going to surrender, she quickly cringed in disgust as she saw Dumbledore on the back of a centaur making love to it. That was enough fule for Mrs Davis to put the school on lock down and prepare for war with Dumbledores army.
Dumbledore had conjured up a radio and put on his favorite gay song "Firefly". He then conjured up a pool chair, sat down on it and started to have sex with Aragog again! 1hr later and extremely sweaty Dumbledore checked his watch "1 hour 15 minutes and 27 seconds, he said with a hearty chuckle, and extracting his penis from Aragog so he could polish it.
Harry was in his dorm looking out the window at the events unfolding. He seemed to almost be blind to the fact that Dumbledore was doing all of these anticts outside. Until after Dumbledore but fucked a couple more centaurs, spotted Harry. Dumbledore started making kissy faces at Harry and scrunched up his breast in the direction of Harry, before making love to Aragog again.
Moments later Dumbledore checked his watch again. 30 minutes 27 seconds Dumbledore sighed with a wheeze. Just then he remembered he needed to make an important message. " Free ice cream sandwiches to any male who will make love to me!" Dumbledore belched so everyone could hear.
Moments later: CRASH! and Ronald and Neville came running out of the school year to get there ice cream sandwiches. "Ahh Ronald and Neville you know you can get yours for free!" Dumbledore wheezed jumping up and down. "We want to join your army!" Ronald meowed. "That's right!" Chimed in Neville. "I've raised you two young men right!" Dumbledore belched engulfing them in a passionate french kiss. Dumbledore then tore the clothes off the two and the three of them began making some hot sweet love. Moments later they all exploded splattering the outside walls of Hogwarts with sticky seamen.
Susan Davis had enough. She had just wiped seamen off her face. She had to put an end to it! Susan aimed her wand at the cluster at the gate and fired. "Avada Kedavra!" She screamed.
Neville was throwing his clothes back on and eating his ice cream sandwich like it was noones business. Just like that he was hit with a flash of green light. Neville was dead. Soon there were multiple flashes of green light. They were striking and killing many centaurs. An irrate Dumbledore let out a battle cry "Charge!"