A/N: Two away from a hundred reviews. *squeals* You have no idea how much this excites me. Mainly because your reviews are so lovely and just make me want to update as soon as possible.

Also I apologize if I make mistakes. I don't have a beta and I do re-read about a thousand times but sometimes I just miss things.

Emily was still asleep when I awoke the night morning, her head resting on my shoulder and the length of her body pressed against mine as she breathed deep and even. She was so beautiful when she slept with her hair tousled and slightly parted lips. I couldn`t help myself. I reached my hand up to stroke the hair from her face before sliding my hand down, fingers brushing gently against her skin and stopping at her forearm. I had half expected her to be gone by the time I woke, but the fact she was still here sent a warn feeling spreading throughout my chest.

Last night, and right now, was the second most agonizing thing I'd experienced in my entire life, apart from having a bloody wall fall on me, that was pretty painful. It had been a while since I had been with her and the fact she had kept wriggling against me while we had both slept didn't help at all. Even now I edged my hips away from her in case she woke up and sensed that I was half hard. I felt like such a pervert but I couldn't help it, my body was ignoring everything my brain was telling it to do. I froze when I felt her move; my hand that had been stroking her arm suddenly gripped it tightly. But she only buried her face into my shoulder and let out a long groan in her sleep. Sighing in relief I let my hand move again. Her skin felt so warm, amazingly soft.

Damn it.

I hated myself for wanting her so much. I hated myself for thinking about her when I was alone; imaging it was her touching me instead of my own pathetic hand.

Damn. It.

I figured it would have died down. At least that's what I told myself. That if I ever did see her again it wouldn't make my chest clench and my heart race and make me sweat like some stupid teenager. George had attempted to take my mind of it, of course. When a pretty girl came into the shop he would always attempt to make me talk to them, but I just wasn't interested. If it wasn't Emily I didn't care. George had called it growth but had also told me it was my fault I was alone in the first place. He wasn't half wrong.

What her brother had said at the funeral suddenly popped into my mind. "Win her back." A few years ago I probably would have tried, seen it as a competition between me and Barry, I would have loved that. But I couldn't win her, I didn't want to. She wasn't a prize and I wasn't going to play some game with her. I was through with that. Right then and there I decided that as soon as she woke up I would ask her if she really loved Barry, if he made her really happy. If she said yes, without a hint of doubt, I wasn't going to get in the way of that. As miserable as I was without her, I'd rather just let her be happy with him, if that's what she really wanted.

I gently pulled myself away, removing myself from her grip. I yawned and sat on the edge of the bed running my fingers through my hair. Looking back at her I decided against waking her, If she was finally sleeping I was going to be the one to disturb her.

It took a few moments for me to stand and leave the room, closing the door quietly behind me. I went straight to the kitchen to make myself tea, not bothering to check if George was home. Then I heard the voice behind me. "Afternoon." I turned and saw him sat on the sofa, arching an eyebrow at me.

"What?" I asked and realised how dry my throat was.

"It's twelve thirty. Afternoon."

"Oh." How the bloody hell did I manage to sleep for so long?

"I, uh, came into wake you up when I got back, but then I noticed that you weren't alone."

"Right."

George had now moved off the sofa and to the other side of the counter, watching me as I made my drink.

"Can I help you?" I asked, only just slightly annoyed. He was standing there just staring at me, still wearing that damn smirk.

"Why is she here?" he enquired.

"Showed up last night." I shrugged.

"You liar."

"Bloody odd thing to lie about." I replied.

"Why is she sleeping in your bed, with you?"

I shrugged but he just continued to stare me down, so I finally responded. "Because…she didn't want to sleep alone, ok? What are you doing back here anyway?" although I didn't really care I was hoping to change the subject.

"Shower and change, then I'm going back." He grinned. "But I still don't understand why she's here."

I sighed. Subject not changed. "Because yesterday was her dad's funeral and she was having a really hard time?"

"But. Why. Is. She. HERE?"

"George, just…shut up. Ok?" I turned so he was forced to look at my back. The last thing I wanted was to get into a big discussion with him. George must have read my mind because he let out a small huff before disappearing into his bedroom.

Before he left George informed that he wouldn't be back tonight, just in case, so I glared at him as he waved and leaves the apartment.

Even though we had decided to keep the shop shut for the day I spent the rest of the day down there anyway, catching up on paperwork, hiding in case she wakes up. I still go upstairs though, every few hours or so. Just to check in on her. When I do she's still asleep and I quickly disappear back downstairs.

It wasn't until late in the evening when I peak my head around the door that's she's starting to stir. She wriggled under the covers and slowly opens her eyes, yawning heavily. I consider leaving instead of just hovering in the bloody doorway, but she sits up, crossing her legs and brushing her hair behind her ears. She rubbed her eyes before lazily looking at me, smiling when she does. "Good - morning." She says, yawning between the words. I smile at her and walk over to the window, pulling the curtain back. "It was. Several hours ago."

Her eyes go wide for a brief moment when she sees the dark blue of the sky. "I was asleep all day?

"I would have woken you earlier but I didn't know…if I should."

"Thank you for not. I feel better now that I've slept."

"Good. I'm glad. You look better…uh…rested."

"Rested." She mutters, smiling. "I feel disgusting though." She combs her hair with her fingers, grimacing as she does. "And hungry actually. I should probably go home."

"I can make you something to eat while you have a bath." I say instantly and so quickly it pretty much comes out as one incredibly long word. Ok. Fine. So I don't want her to leave. I haven't t asked her about Barry yet because I can't find enough nerve to. Emily shuffles on the bed for a moment and tucks the loose strands of hair that have fallen back behind her ears. "Are you sure?"

"Sure I'm sure."

She gets out from under the covers and stands, taking a few tentative steps towards me. "Everything still in the same place?" She asks. I nod and she smiles shyly at me before turning to make her way to the bathroom.

I go to the kitchen and start to search for something to make, I'm not exactly a culinary expert but I can still make basic stuff. Eggs. Scrambled eggs! I can probably do that without completely burring it. Wrong. I end up burning the toast.

I'm almost done when she appears, her skin still flushed from the hot water but her hair is now wavy and her clothes appeared to have been cleaned as well. She places her wand on the table as she takes a seat and I bring over a plate. "It's just eggs." I shrug as I set the plate down, but she looks up at me and smiles. "Thank you. It looks good."

I feel a small stab of triumph as I sit opposite and start on my own meal. I watch her as she pushes the egg of the toast and starts eating that first, gently nibbling at the edges even though I burnt it a little. She looks up at me and swallows. "Thank you again, Fred."

"It's burnt toast and egg." I shrug.

"Not that. For letting me stay here. Even though I shouldn't be sleeping in bed with a man while I'm engaged. It's unseemly." She chuckles.

"We could have been doing a lot worse." I reply, swallowing hard when I hear my comment out loud. She stares at me for a few seconds before lowering her gaze back to her eggs. "Besides," I continue, I can't seem to shut up. "You're the one who kissed me while you're…engaged."

Her head shot back up. "I…I most certainly did not."

"Yeah, you did."

"Last night? No…no I didn't. We didn't…kiss. I don't…recall us,"

"Not last night. It was yesterday though, at the – uh – at the wake."

"Oh" Her gaze lowers and she pushes around the egg with her fork. "I completely forgot about that." She remarks softly and her brows furrow together in confusion. "But you didn't kiss back."

I wasn't expecting that. I was expecting 'well it wasn't that sort of kiss', not that I didn't kiss back! "You didn't give me time to." I reply after what seems like an eternity.

"So…you would of?"

"No...I mean yes…I… I…would of if you wanted…me…to…" Smooth.

"Would you have wanted to?"

"Of course I would but that…that's not the point. I mean, I… "I didn't know what so say so I quickly shoved a large amount of egg into my mouth, chewing on it slowly. Emily has stopped eating; she was now staring down at her hands instead. I swallowed my mouthful hard. As soon as I do she suddenly stands and starts to clear the plates, I move to help but she holds up her hand. "I can wash up Fred. You made it."

I sit there as she works, washing up by hand rather slowly. I guess neither of us know what to say to each other and I realise I should probably ask her now instead of just letting this drag on.

"Does he…make you happy?"

"Yes." She replied instantly, although there was a slight tremble and she suddenly started to scrub harder.

"Really happy? As happy as anyone could possibly be?"

It took her longer to answer this time. "Yes." She trembled again. As long as the tremble remained there, I wasn't going to leave it at that.

"You're not wearing your engagement ring." I point out.

She almost drops the plate but manages to save it just in time and sets it down on the side, hands quivering slightly. "I don't really feel like wearing it all the time." She shrugs. "Doesn't mean that he doesn't make me happy."

As she speaks I stand and slowly walk up behind her. She's obviously noticed because her body suddenly tenses and her movements become slower.

"Did I make you happy?" I asked.

She stops what she's doing and grabs a tea towel to dry her hands, but as she speaks she still doesn't dare turn around. "Of course you did, Fred."

I bring my hand to her shoulder, squeezing it gently before running my hand down her back in a slow graceful movement. She shivers slightly and turns to me and I feel my heart swell, until she continued. "But you broke my heart. I sat by you in that hospital every day while you were out. At the battle I cried over your body because I thought you were….I thought you were dead. I sat there and rambled complete and utter nonsense to try and wake you up because I was so terrified I would never get to hear your voice or…hear your laugh. See you smile." A tear rolls down her cheek and she quickly wipes it away. "Then you wake up and you just…" Her voice had turned thick with tears and she folded her arms together tightly across her stomach. "I should be angry at you. You ended our relationship for no good reason."

"I had a rea,"

"No! No you didn't!" She cuts me off and stabs a finger in my chest. "Not a good one. I mean look at you, it's been a little over a year and you're up and walking and you're fine."

"It wasn't easy." I tell her, trying to hold back the anger I could feel building at the memory, the stupid fucking memory of all those months of pain. "I'm not fine though, I'm still in pain, I can't bloody walk straight, I can't run!"

"But you're alive!" She almost screams at me."That's...that's all that matters." Her voice goes so quiet so quickly I very nearly don't hear her. "I shouldn't allow you to worm your way back in so easily. How on earth do you manage to do that?"

"You let him worm his way back in." I say while trying to keep the venom out of my voice. I fail.

"You can say his name, you know."

"I don't want to."

Just one look from her and all my anger vanishes. I could feel the twitch in her hand as she wraps it ever so gracefully around my wrist. Her touch is warm against mine and I hate myself when I feel a sudden surge of lust burn through me. I'm wondering if she can feel it too.

"I miss you."

She shakes her head but doesn't break our locked gaze. "Fred..."

"Do you miss me?"

"Don't."

"Do you still love me?"

This time she diverts her eyes to the ground. I cup her chin in my hand, forcing it up so she has no choice but to look at me. "Do you still love me?" I repeat. She takes in this sharp breath as soon as I ask again, like someone is punching her in the gut.

"Fred I…I need to go" She slips past me and hurriedly picks up her wand before making for my room again. I follow and find her sat on the end of my bed, slipping her shoes on.

"Emily you have to talk to me."

She suddenly seems so tired again, like she has no energy to do anything. "I can't. Please Fred, don't do this to me. I should…I have to be angry at you…"

"You're the one who came here." I tell her gently.

"I know!" she cries back and pushes herself up from the bed. "But you came to the hospital first! You sent me all those letters!"

"You did get my letters then?" There had been letters, so many at first. One a week if I remember correctly, but then after a few months I just gave up. She looked away, guilty as anything so I carry on. "Did your dad ever give you a letter from me? The first one?"

She nods.

"And?"

"I didn't open it." She uttered softly. "Any of them actually. I couldn't. I didn't want to know what you wrote…so…I tore them up and threw them away."

"You didn't even….but…didn't you think I deserved that much? Just reading my letter?"

"Don't you dare!" she cried. "How could you possible say that? Deserve that much? Fred, when you showed up at the hospital I should have kicked you out then and there. I knew it would be nothing but trouble. And my dad, he should of never have agreed to give me that letter. What did you expect? That I would read whatever rubbish you wrote, forgive you, and then come running back into your arms?"

"No! I just…It doesn't matter anyway. I suppose by this time you were already shacked up with Barry though. Hope I would find," suddenly she's right in front of me and her hand is clamping over my mouth. I freeze. The silence between us starts to stretch as neither of us move or talk, building until it felt unbearable. "Don't say something you'll regret. Ok? I don't want you to say something you'll regret because you're very prone to that." I don't move. I don't speak. Mainly because I can't. "I'm sorry for saying what I did. It probably wasn't rubbish, what you wrote. You have to understand I was really hurt, and you promised me you would never hurt me." Her eyes are glistening; she's trying to hold back the tears. She's probably gotten rather good at that lately.

I sadly nod; trying to show that I understand what she just said, and also that I won't say another word about it which is a rather hard task to manage, considering. Still Emily doesn't move her hand. I bring my own up to move the hair from her face and she smiles softly at me. Only then does she slowly lower it, forcing it to rest against my chest. She's watching me carefully, waiting for my next move but I'm just standing there staring at her like an idiot. Her eyes are huge, full of anticipation. That gorgeous light blue that I loved so much suddenly seems darker. "I want to be your friend, Fred. I really do."

I sigh and bring my hands up to her forearms, clasping them gently. "I don't think I can have you as just a friend, Em. Every time I'd see you with him, it would kill me. And I know that sounds selfish but…I wouldn't be able to take it."

"You'll meet someone."

I shake my head.

"Fred, of course you will. You never had any trouble before. Why would you now?"

"Because they're not you."

She's quiet for a moment, thinking of something to say after my confession. "That's rather cheesy, wouldn't you agree?" She smiles and I force myself to as well. I don't really feel like smiling. "Isn't that a good thing though? That they won't be like me? No one moaning at you or arguing with you all the time…or at least a lot less."

"No. Not a good thing. Never."

Her smiles disappears at my answer. I bring my hand up to cup her jaw, my thumb gently moves across her cheek where a light blush has risen, looking utterly lovely against her skin. "I know I shouldn't ask but…can you forgive me? Even though I know I don't deserve it. But I couldn't have you hate me for the rest of my life. Not being able to have you and have you hate me. I couldn't stand it."

"I don't hate you." She answers tenderly. "I was hurt and I tried…but I can't hate you." I see her bottom lip tremble and I unconsciously brush my thumb against it. I know I shouldn't but I can't stop myself.

"Just tell me what you want, Emily. I'll do anything you want as long as you tell me what it is."

"I don't know what I want."

"Do you want Barry?" I ask.

At first she narrows her eyes at me; even opens her mouth to speak…but nothing comes out, as if someone has their hand wrapped around her throat and she's not allowed to make a sound.

Then I ask the obvious question. Well I have to ask it, don't I?

"Do you want me?"