Chapter Twenty-Six: My Sanity On The Funeral Pyre

James straightened his tie, staring at his reflection in the mirror. He attempted to flatten his hair to no avail, so he simply shrugged and pulled on his jacket.

"Nice suit." Sirius was leaning on the door frame, his arms crossed. "All you wear at the wake is black slacks, meanwhile you're hiding that in your closet?"

"It's Dad's," James said, bending to tie the shoes. "You're taking care of the food for Paula, right?"

Sirius nodded, saying, "One o'clock."

"See you at the house at one, then," James said, passing Sirius.

"Do you have your wand?"

"No, why?"

"Flooing is going to mess up your super spiffy suit."

"…good point."

Only a few minutes later, James found himself in Lily's living room. It had been a few days since the death of her father and James had barely left Lily's side. He was Flooing back and forth between houses only when Lily was asleep.

He heard a few unfamiliar voices from the kitchen, so he headed toward the room. Paula was standing at the counter in a long black dress pouring mugs of coffee. Sat at the table was a bony blond woman, a pudgy dark-haired man and a snooty-looking redheaded woman.

"James," Paula said, moving toward the table to give the others their coffee. "I'm glad you're here. She refuses to speak or get out of bed."

"Ruining everything, as usual," said the boney blond.

"Excuse me?" said James, outraged.

"Just go up and talk to her, please, James," Paula said, glaring at the young woman. "We need to leave soon."

"'Course, Paula," James said, deciding that this wasn't the time to be arguing with this stranger. He left the kitchen. Whoever that boney woman was, he did not like her.

Once he made it up the stairs, he saw that Lily's door was closed. He moved down the hallway to the closed door and raised a hand to knock. "Lily," he said. "It's James…open up or I'll do it myself. I have my wand with me, and I'm not afraid to use it."

No movement could be heard from inside of the room. James removed his wand from the special inside pocket of his jacket. "Alohamora."

Pushing the door open, James stepped into the bedroom. He slowly closed the door behind him and approached the bed. All of Lily except for a bit of her flaming hair was covered by her comforter.

"Lily," James said softly. He sat on the bed, a hand on what he gathered was Lily's back. "Lily, you need to get ready," James said, rubbing her back. "Paula says it's nearly time to leave."

"Dun wanna," was the muffled response that he received.

"Come on, Lils…you've made it through the wake. This is the last step…it's so hard, but you have to say goodbye."

"Dun wanna."

"Lily, you have to," James said. "You're going to regret it later in life if you don't go. Your father…you need to say goodbye."

James tentatively peeled the blankets back. Lily had her face buried in her pillow and was hugging it to her body tightly. James gently brushed her hair back with one of his hands as he sighed heavily.

Lily rolled over, finally, and stared up at him. Her eyes were bloodshot and her face was stained with tears. "I can't do this," she managed to whisper.

James didn't know what to say, so he said nothing. Instead, he stood and moved to Lily's closet where a black skirt and blouse were hanging on the doorknob. He brought the outfit back over to the bed and laid it out, removing any wrinkles with his wand.

"Who's the anorexic looking girl downstairs?" James asked as he moved back over to the closet to fetch a pair of shoes.

"Blond?"

"Mmhmm."

"That would be Petunia…my dear sister," Lily said quietly.

"Hmm…would there be a problem with me and Padfoot…freaking her out right before she leaves the house later?" James asked lightly.

Lily actually offered up a small smile-which made James feel quite accomplished-and said, "Go ahead."

"Perfect," James said, placing her shoes on the bed next to her outfit. "Now, do I need to dress you, or can you do this part yourself?"

Lily slowly sat up, then she moved to stand on her knees, still on the bed. She opened her arms, indicating that she wanted a hug. James moved closer to the bed and pulled her into a tight one.

"Thank you, James," she whispered into his shoulder, tears burning her eyes again.

"I'll be waiting downstairs and trying not to kill your sister," James said truthfully as he let her go, earning himself another small-yet tearful-smile.

Downstairs, the people had all moved into the living room and were sitting on the couch while Paula was fixing her hair in the mirror. When he reached the bottom of the steps, James shoved his hands into his pants pockets and leaned on the banister. When Paula heard him, she looked over.

James nodded, saying, "She's getting dressed…should be down in a moment."

"Thanks so much, dear," said Paula, turning back to the small mirror. "I knew you'd be able to get her up."

"What are you? The brat's boyfriend or something?" the horse-faced girl-Petunia, James reminded himself-questioned nastily.

"No," answered James curtly. "We're best friends." He wanted so badly to pull his wand out a hex the young woman, but reminded himself again that this was neither the place nor the time…that would come later.

"Would you like any coffee or some sort of drink, James?" Paula inquired, cutting off whatever response that Petunia had.

"Sure," said James, following Paula into the kitchen. Once they were out of earshot of the other three, he whispered, "I'm going to dropkick that boney little-"

"James!" Paula scolded, reaching for a clean mug.

"I'm sorry," James said truthfully. "She's just so-"

"Incredibly horrible? I know."

"Lily said I'm allowed to freak her out later," James said, accepting his black coffee. "I hope you don't mind…"

"Go right ahead," said Paula. "I could use a laugh." She led the way back into the living room just as Lily was heading down the stairs, her flaming red hair and brilliant green eyes standing out against her all black attire.

The ride to the church was a silent one. When they had climbed into the back of the limousine, Lily had taken hold of James' hand. From that moment on, she didn't let go of it, opting instead to squeeze it tightly as she cried throughout the service.

Now they were at the cemetery. The priest along with some good friends had spoken about Jonathan Evans, and now everyone was lining up to place a flower on his casket. This was the first time in a few hours that Lily let go of James' hand. She stepped up and away from him, and she placed the flower on top of the casket.

With that flower, she felt like she was letting go of her father's hand. It was the first time since that horrible night that the fact that her father was never coming back was sinking in. It hadn't seemed real before…but it was real now…it was real.

Lily fell to her knees as tears streamed down her face. What was she going to do now? Who was going to walk her down the aisle? Who was going to give her away at her wedding? There would be no father daughter dances…her children would not know their grandfather and how wonderful of a man he truly was…no…now there was nothing but fading memories.

James placed his flower onto the casket, then slowly knelt down, placing a hand on each of Lily's shoulders. "It's going to be okay, Lils," he said just above a whisper as he half lifted her into a standing position. He led her back to where Paula was standing, and the two women embraced.

It felt like an eternity before the large group of people that had gathered to say goodbye to Jonathan Evans found themselves back at the home of Lily and Paula. When James and Lily entered the house behind Paula, they saw Sirius sticking his head into the hallway from the kitchen.

"Everything is set up out back," he said, fully emerging, a towel over his shoulder. He walked up to Lily and hugged her tightly.

"Thank you, Sirius," Paula said, moving to the back of the house where there was a door to the backyard. Everyone who was coming in followed her except for the three teens.

"I'm just going to…go upstairs for a while," Lily said. "I'm not really hungry."

"Do you want to be alone?" James questioned, a hand on her shoulder.

"Yeah," Lily said quietly.

James nodded. "Okay," he said. "I'll check on you later, alright?"

Lily nodded, turning and leaving the two boys standing in her living room.

"I wish there was something I could do for her," James said, loosening his tie and walking toward the back with Sirius.

"Me too," Sirius agreed, tossing the towel into the kitchen as they passed it. "But, I mean, we've just got to give her space…same thing you needed, you know?"

Nodding, James sighed. "Her sister is horrible...but she says that before the girl leaves, we're allowed to freak her out."

Identical mischievous smiles crept onto the faces of both boys. "What did you have in mind, my dear Prongs?"

"Well," James said, moving to the table where Sirius' food was and picking out what he wanted to eat. "How about this…keep an eye on her." James pointed to where the boney girl was speaking with her pudgy boyfriend. "When we see her go into the house alone to like…go to the bathroom or something, I'll follow her in and transform. When she comes out she'll be completely freaked out that there's a stag in the house. She'll probably scream at which point you, who will have been in the next room come running and you see me and you scream, then she'll look at you and you just transform into Padfoot. She'll either faint or run away, at which point we transform back like nothing ever happened."

"Hmm…Prongs, I love you."