101 Ways To Kill Jar Jar Binks
I've gotten a lot of suggestions lately…just to let you know, I will eventually be using Jabba and the carbonite suggestion…but I'll be doing so at my own pace…so don't suggest that anymore OK? It's starting to get on my nerves…
I have actually come up with similar suggestions to those two (one of which I'm using right now and one I'll be using in the near future), so I hope you'll be happy for the time being…
So enjoy this new chapter!
Chapter 26: Swamp Slug
Once again our heroes were plotting the death of a Gungan they had united against. This time, they decided to feed him to yet another creature in the galaxy, a Swamp Slug from the planet Dagobah. It had been a while since they actually tried to feed Jar Jar Binks to a carnivorous creature, so Anakin Skywalker decided it would be a good time to do so.
"Haven't we fed him to a few creatures already?" wondered Padme curiously.
"And haven't we gone to Dagobah before?" Obi-Wan Kenobi asked Anakin Skywalker.
"I know I know, I just thought that this would be an entertaining method to dispose of the Gungan."
"If you say so." replied Qui-Gon Jinn.
And so our heroes convinced Jar Jar Binks to hop aboard their space shuttle as they flew towards Dagobah, unaware that this was where he would die once again, or to be more specific to be eaten there for the second time.
After dropping Jar Jar Binks onto this swamp slug-infested part of the planet, our heroes then took Jar Jar Binks towards his latest death trap.
"Wow! Look at all thesa slugs!" Jar Jar Binks exclaimed with astonishment.
Suddenly, one of them came up to Jar Jar Binks…
"Aww! It like mesa!" Jar Jar Binks assumed incorrectly.
Suddenly the swamp slug swallowed Jar Jar Binks whole. Jar Jar Binks rapidly died from being digested by the giant slug due to the fact that the large amounts of stomach acid inside it gave him third-degree burns.
Well, that and there was no oxygen inside of the slug either, meaning that he suffocated.
Our heroes were then forced to attempt to give the swamp slug the Heimlich maneuver in order to get it to spit Jar Jar Binks' body out unfortunately, due to the fact that unlike before, no trace had been left behind of Jar Jar Binks' body. Surprisingly and fortunately, they managed to succeed without being eaten alive as well. Well, except for Qui-Gon Jinn, but they managed to get him out too using the same method.
Suddenly, some dragon snakes came by and started fighting the swamp slugs, which forced our heroes to flee and save Jar Jar Binks' body for later murder…
…at least until the dragon snakes and swamp slugs noticed Jar Jar Binks' corpse and quickly remembered how annoying he was and the fact that he was infamous for being so throughout the galaxy, decided to put aside their differences simply to bring down the Gungan menace, not unlike many members of the Anti-Jar Jar Binks Organization and subsequently left the area to plot his next death.
Surprised at this astonishing turn of events, our heroes retrieved Jar Jar Binks' and Qui Gon Jinn's bodies and flew back into their fancy space shuttle, ready to continue killing Jar Jar Binks for many deaths to come.
How would they kill him next? The galaxy would never know until it actually happened…which naturally would not take long.
The first quarter of Jar Jar Binks' deaths are done, now the second and more grisly quarter is coming…what deaths will be part of it? Can you guess? Or do you have any suggestions to leave for me as usual?
I've currently got my own ideas for the time being however…so I probably won't accept them right now…but it's still appreciated!