A/N: Long time. I know.
This isn't the last chapter. I split the chapter because I felt it was too long. The next chapter is finished and being tweaked. I'll post it within a couple of days, and that one really is the last chapter. :)
As always, thanks to my fabulous beta, Windgirl810, who turned this around super fast because of my own neurosis about when I was posting it. :) She's great. I love her.
Three great friends also preread for me (even though they really do so much more than prereading!): Littlecat358, Tennesseelamb and Michelle0526. I'm lucky to know all of you!
Thanks for reading - please review if you feel like it. :)
"Ten bucks if you can hit his mouth," Jas whispers.
"Ten? Ten? You used to pay me twenty," I answer lowly, turning to look at him. I eat the last two pieces of popcorn out of my hand.
"I used to be afraid you didn't have money. When you first started working for us, we could hardly afford to pay you. Now I know you make good bank." He smiles at me the same way he always has, and I feel a pang of sadness in my chest.
"Everything's changing," I whine, slumping toward him to lean on his shoulder.
"For the better, Baby Swan," he reassures me. "Unless you've changed your mind about moving in with Edward. It's not too late."
Chuckling, I look at the boxes stacked around the living room. My stuff is all packed up and I'm here with just my boys… for just one more night.
"I haven't," I reply, smiling softly.
Honestly, I can't wait to move in with Edward tomorrow. I haven't had a second thought about it since I made the decision three weeks ago. I'm nervous, excited – and since I'm a chicken-shit at heart, also scared. But I'm absolutely sure that I made the right choice for myself. For us.
"Did you finally tell your dad?" Jas asks, amused.
"Yeah. He was surprisingly cool and supportive. I didn't even have to bring up the whole loaded shotgun incident." Under my head, Jas' shoulder shakes with silent laughter, but my smile fades as I sigh. "This is it, Jas. It will never be just the three of us like this again."
"Probably not," he agrees. "Now it'll be the six of us."
"Five."
"Six."
"Five."
"Six," he insists. "Who aren't you counting?"
"Rosalie," I say, smirking. I can't help it.
"I thought you were getting along with her." Jas nudges me off his shoulder, forcing me to sit up and look at him.
"I am," I huff. "But still… I used to think she was engaged to the man I love. It's not that easy to get over."
"You forgave him." Jas gives me his version of the look Mama uses on the boys when they know they're not behaving the way they should.
"Shut up," I scowl, lowering my eyes. I can't look into his scolding Texas skies right now. "I'm mostly fine with her. I can't say this shit to anyone except you. Can't I just have a moment of bad feelings about her every once in a while?"
"Yeah, you can," he allows, slinging his arm around my shoulder. He pulls me close and kisses the top of my head. "Just don't say it to Em."
At the mention of his name, Emmett stirs on the couch across the room. "Huh? You say something to me?" he mumbles.
"No, sweetie. Go back to sleep," I soothe. Jas and I sit in silence for a moment, watching Emmett drift back to sleep, arms flung over his head, mouth hanging wide open once more. "Thanks for helping me pack, Jas. And for helping me after Jake… and with all the Edward stuff. You're the best friend I've ever had."
"You're welcome, Baby Swan," he answers. He sounds like he might be a little choked up, so I pull away to look at him. His eyes are misty, which makes me immediately tear up, too. I turn sideways on the fireplace hearth, and we wrap our arms around each other tightly.
"God, Jas. I'll miss you so much."
"Sugar, you realize you'll still see me every day at work, right?"
"I know," I laugh. "But it'll be different."
"Yeah. Now you'll go home at night and bitch to Edward about the little princesses in our office. Thank God I won't have to listen to that shit anymore," Jas teases, trying to lighten the mood.
Across the room from us, Emmett mutters something in his sleep. Jas pulls away from me and reaches for the popcorn bowl on the floor at our feet. He holds it out to me, and I take another handful.
"All right. Twenty bucks if you hit his mouth," he challenges.
Since he didn't give me any conditions, I toss all the popcorn in my hand at Emmett's face, raising my arms above my head in victory when two pieces hit his open mouth. Emmett sits up, blinking sleepily and brushing away the popcorn on his chest as Jas and I laugh.
"I knew you would do that," Jas declares, shaking his head at me as I stand up. I carry the bowl and our empty beer bottles into the kitchen while he gets Em up and drags him to the guestroom.
When I get upstairs, Jas is leaning against the wall in the hallway.
"We're starting at eight, right?" he asks, stifling a yawn.
"Yep," I answer, yawning, too.
"All right. I'm turning in then," he says. "Gimme some sugar, sugar."
We kiss on the cheek, and then hug tightly.
"Love you, Jas," I whisper.
"I love you, too, darlin'. But this one had better stick," he drawls, his accent more pronounced since he's tired. "This is the last fucking time I'm helping you move."
Although I fall asleep easily, I wake up several times during the night, anxiously checking the clock. By the time my room starts to get light, I've been awake and staring at the ceiling for over an hour. With a sigh, I get up and shower, and then pack the last of my things from up here.
Silently, I go downstairs, wandering slowly from room to room until I wind up in the kitchen. After I start the coffee, I pull open the dishwasher and check to see if I missed anything of mine. I find my favorite spatula and toss it into the open box on the counter, but that's it. Everything else is Jasper's. Trying to ignore the butterflies in my stomach, I tape the box shut and carry it to the living room, stacking it on top of the other kitchen boxes near the door.
It's barely past seven o'clock, so I'm surprised when I look out the window and see Edward backing a borrowed truck into the driveway. Grinning widely, I step out onto the porch and stand at the top of the steps to watch him walk up the sidewalk.
"Good morning, Ned," I say as he climbs toward me. He stops on the stair just below me.
"Hi, baby."
"I thought you'd still be in bed, enjoying your last morning without me," I tease, kissing him, and then wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
"Yeah, it's gonna suck waking up with you every day," he laughs, burying his face in my neck.
"I could sleep in the guest room."
"No way, Stel," he murmurs against my skin. I kiss the side of his head as he tightens his arms around my waist. We stand still for a moment, until he pulls back to look at me with a smirk. "I'm sure I'll get used to your snoring eventually."
"Edward Cullen, I do not snore!" I punch his arm playfully and kiss him back when he leans in again.
Taking his hand, I pull him inside, quietly telling him that Jas and Em are still sleeping.
"You sure have a lot of shit," he observes as we wind through the boxes scattered around the living room.
"You're the one who said I could move all my shit to your house," I whisper teasingly, turning around to smile at him.
In the kitchen, I pour coffee for both of us. Edward takes his and leans against the counter. I take mine and lean against him, my back to his chest. We drink in silence for a moment before I speak.
"You're sure, right? That you want to live with me?"
"Mmhmm," he answers, taking another sip as he wraps his free arm around my waist, pulling me closer. "You're not changing your mind, are you?"
"No," I say softly, shaking my head with confidence. "No, I'm not."
"You're nervous?" Reluctantly, I nod. "Did you take Pepto?"
Laughing, I turn around to look up at him. I wasn't even aware he knew of my penchant for using the pink stuff to settle my nerves. "Not yet."
He sets his coffee down on the counter behind him and lifts his hand, warm from the heat of the cup, to the side of my neck. "I'm nervous, too, Stel. It's a big day for us, yeah?"
"Yeah." My voice is barely above a whisper.
"I'm sure things between us will change in some ways," he says, his deep, green eyes fixed on mine. "And every day won't be perfect. We won't be perfect. But I love you, and I'm committed to you. I'm not running away."
"I'm not running either," I insist, raising up on my tiptoes to press my lips to his. "I love you."
Winding one arm around his neck, I kiss him several times before pulling his bottom lip in between mine. He responds by sliding the hand on my neck up into my hair. At the same time, he snakes the fingers of his other hand under the material of my t-shirt, stroking gently… slowly… along the skin just above the waistband of my shorts.
I let my teeth scrape along his lip as I let go, starting to rear back.
"Uh uh," he mutters, using the hand in my hair to keep me in place. "Fuck, how long has it been since we kissed like this?"
"Two days," I breathe, gripping the material of his shirt to pull myself closer. Still holding my coffee cup in my other hand, I wrap that arm around his back as we press our mouths together, tongues and lips touching and then retreating again and again.
"Whoa! Break it up, you two. It's too early in the day for me to stomach the tongue wars," Emmett complains when he comes into the kitchen.
Edward pulls his mouth away, chuckling. "Hey, Emmett," he greets, turning his head toward the interrupter. After lowering myself to stand flat-footed, I rest my head against Edward's chest, inhaling his scent and half-listening to them plan the logistics of moving all my stuff. As he talks – the vibration of his voice rumbling soothingly under my ear – he continues ghosting his fingers across the skin of my lower back.
With a silent sigh, I think back to the day that Jake moved in with me. We had just gotten engaged, and I figured the next logical step was to live together. My boys didn't help that day. I knew they didn't like Jake very much, but other than a few snide comments, they supported me. In retrospect, I wish I'd paid more attention to their observations and had the wisdom to get rid of him before the proposal. Although who knows where I would have ended up by now if I had? I guess things happened the way they were supposed to.
Closing my eyes, I swallow, releasing the grasp I have on Edward's shirt and curling my fingers around the nape of his neck instead. I feel him press his lips to my forehead. I hear Jas come in, mumbling about needing caffeine. But I keep my eyes shut, letting my thoughts center on this man – the one I'm clinging to, depending on, planning on living with for the rest of my life. It seems silly now that I considered, however briefly, turning him down when he came to Key West. Even with the pain of everything we went through last fall and winter, the end result is better than I imagined it could be.
"Baby Swan, are you gonna stand there daydreaming all day or are we gonna move your ass in with Edward?" Jas asks teasingly.
My eyes pop open as I laugh happily, looking first at Edward, and then turning to Jas and Em. "Let's move my ass."
We move all of my boxes first, finishing just as Alice and Riley arrive with pizza for lunch. Once we've eaten, Alice offers to help me unpack while the guys head back to Jasper's to start moving my furniture.
For the next three hours, we put things away in the home office, the living room and, finally, the kitchen. Alice chatters about Jasper almost nonstop the same way he does about her. By the time we're organizing the kitchen cabinets, I'm listening distractedly to her while also trying to hear what the guys are talking about in the living room. They're taking a break – with beer – and have been laughing loudly.
"What do you think they're talking about?" I ask, looking up at her. I'm sitting on the floor trying to sort out Edward's plastic containers.
"Women or sports," she smiles. "What else would they be talking about?"
"Sex," I whisper, laughing as I glance at Riley. She's very carefully unpacking a box at the table and not paying attention to us at all. "But I can't talk about that with you."
"Why not? The day I met you, you were sitting on the counter in your undies with your tongue in my brother's mouth," she says quietly, bending down so Riley can't hear. "Forget talking about it. Riley and I almost witnessed the real deal."
As we both laugh, the guys' voices fade. They must be heading back upstairs.
"True," I concede. "But still. I don't want to know how my best friend is in bed any more than you want to know how your brother is."
"It's a fact of life, Bella," she says dismissively. "It doesn't bother me to talk about it."
"So I guess you do want to hear about it then?" I ask, smirking. "Because Edward does this one thing with his –."
"Okay! Stop! Stop!" she exclaims, laughing and holding her hands over her ears the way I did when Mama was talking about Big Daddy. "You win. I don't want to hear it."
We move on to safer topics for a little while before she drops her voice again.
"Are you coming to court Thursday?"
"I don't know," I answer just as quietly, looking up at her. "I want to – for you and for Edward. But he's kind of freaking about it."
"He doesn't want me to go either," she sighs. "But I need to. I have to face James. I don't want him to think he can ever get past me… get to Riley."
"He can't, Alice," I insist. "He'd have to get through all of us."
"I know," she nods. We keep our gazes fused to each other's for a few more seconds, until Riley walks over and sits down beside me on the floor, holding my salad spinner.
"Bella, next time I stay here can we make something in this?"
"Sure, sweetie," I answer, chuckling when she cranks it as fast as she can.
"Hey, Stel," Edward calls, speaking loudly to be heard over the noise. Turning toward his voice, I see him leaning against the wide kitchen doorway. "You want to come upstairs and make sure we put the furniture where you wanted it?"
"Yep," I answer, smiling at him as I push myself up from the floor. He follows me up the steps, hooking his fingers in the back pocket of my shorts. At the top of the staircase, I start to turn right toward the master bedroom.
"Guest room, baby," he says.
Puzzled, I turn left instead, stopping short at the door to the guest room. Jas and Emmett are inside, setting my lamps on my nightstands. On each side of my bed.
"Why the hell is our bedroom furniture in here?" I ask, looking at Ned over my shoulder.
"Your bedroom furniture is in here," he replies. "Our bedroom furniture is in our bedroom."
I turn all the way around to face him. "We agreed to put my furniture in the master."
"No," he argues, frowning at me. "We agreed to leave mine in the master."
"Edward, I specifically remember you giving in on this," I insist.
"No, you gave in and said 'fine'," he says, mimicking my snotty voice. "Then I said 'okay'."
"Every man knows that when a woman says 'fine' the way I said 'fine', it is one hundred percent not fine!" I reply, heart pounding, volume increasing. "So when you said 'okay', I assumed you understood and were agreeing with me."
"Well, I wasn't."
"Fine." I hold my hands up, palms out, then scoot by him and head to the master bedroom.
Eyes filled with angry tears, I go straight to the walk-in closet. I flip the light on and grab an armful of the hanging clothes I brought over two nights ago. Sniffling, I turn my head to wipe my nose and one cheek on the sleeve of my shirt before I go back into the hallway.
When Edward sees me coming, he huffs out an exasperated breath.
"What are you doing?" he asks lowly as I pass him.
"Moving my clothes into my bedroom," I answer coolly, "where the rest of my things are."
"Oh, Jesus," he mutters under his breath, letting his head drop back and bang against the wall.
Inside the guest room, I slam all the clothes I'm carrying onto the bed, picking up just a few things and stomping to the closet to hang them up. I hear Emmett chuckle softly and turn to glare at him.
"Something to say, big fella?" I ask, raising an eyebrow at him.
"No… nope." He's not smiling anymore as he shakes his head back and forth tightly, rapidly.
"I think we'll go downstairs," Jas announces, leading the way from the bedroom as I get another handful of clothes and roughly hang them on the closet rod. He pauses in the doorway to speak to Edward. "She'll settle down. This is just how she reacts to fear."
"I can hear you, cowboy," I spit, walking toward them. "And this is not how I react to fear. This is how I react to assholes."
"Semi-assholes," Edward asserts. I'm unsure if he's trying to argue or if he's trying to be funny. It doesn't matter. Either way, I'm pissed.
"Full-blown assholes," I retort – loudly – as I push my way between them, rushing down the stairs and out the front door to the porch.
I inhale shakily and lean against one of the support posts, crossing my arms over my chest and facing the street. Carlisle and Esme's car is parked at the curb, meaning they came inside while I was upstairs… meaning they definitely heard me yelling about assholes.
A couple of minutes pass before I hear the door open and close. Recognizing Edward's deep sigh, I stand still as he approaches, stopping just behind and to the left of me.
"I don't want to fight with you," he says quietly.
"I don't want to fight with you either," I whisper.
Neither of us says anything else, letting an uncomfortable silence hang between us. I'm relieved to hear the door open again. I don't look to see who it is, but when Carlisle moves past us to sit down on the porch steps with a quiet groan, I smile involuntarily.
"Gonna be a nice evening," he remarks, looking at the mostly-blue sky above. "Esme and I brought steaks to grill for everyone. You kids have had a long day."
I swallow the lingering lump in my throat, and then answer him since Edward doesn't. "Thank you."
He nods, continuing to look out at the street instead of at Edward and me behind him.
"You know, when Esme and I moved in together, we had the biggest fight over the kitchen table," he muses. "She liked hers. I liked mine. Both of us are independent and had been on our own long enough to be set in our ways. She's also a little stubborn."
I chuckle softly. Carlisle turns to look at me pleadingly.
"Don't tell her I said that. It'll make her mad."
"I won't."
Facing forward again, he continues. "Anyway, we argued. Heatedly. It's odd the way common sense often goes flying out the window just when you need it the most," he observes, pausing to take a deep breath… and probably to let his words sink in. "We left both tables crammed in the kitchen for two days while we hardly spoke to each other. And then she had a brilliant idea. You're allowed to tell her I said that."
He glances briefly over his shoulder at Edward and me. We laugh softly.
"We went and picked out a new table that night. One both of us liked. One that was ours."
Inhaling sharply, I twist around to look at Edward at the same time I feel his hand on the back of my arm. As soon as our eyes meet, we move toward each other, quickly closing the distance. He leans down and I reach up, holding tight.
"I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry, too," I mumble against his shoulder.
"We can move your stuff into the mas–," he begins.
"No, it's fine," I interrupt, not realizing until he chuckles that I've used the word that started the whole stupid argument. I pull away enough to see his face, but don't let go. "I mean that for real this time."
"Got it," he smiles.
"It doesn't matter whose bed we sleep in," I whisper, hugging him again.
"For now," he agrees. "But we'll go pick out our own stuff soon, yeah?"
As I nod, he kisses the side of my head. Sliding one hand into his hair, I shift around to get my lips on his, kissing him several times before pulling back. Glancing toward the steps, I see that Carlisle is gone.
"Where'd your dad go?"
"I don't know," he answers, looking around. "Back inside, I guess."
"Funny how your dad shares helpful anecdotes," I smirk, "while my dad pulls a shotgun on us."
"Your dad gave me some advice when we were in Forks on his birthday," he offers.
"About what?"
"You."
"What did he say?"
"You don't really expect me to tell you, do you? It was all good, baby." He leans down to kiss me again.
"Don't try to distract me, Ned," I warn teasingly as we smile against each other's lips.
"I wasn't going to do this until later, but now seems like the right time." He releases me and takes a step back, reaching into his pocket. My mouth drops open when I see the small, square velvet box in his hand.
"Ned," I breathe, snapping my eyes up to meet his as my heart begins to race. Shit! Am I ready to say yes? I'm not sure. I haven't thought about it much lately. Since the night I told him I'd move in, he hasn't mentioned marriage. He went from proposing several times a week to complete and utter silence on the subject.
When he grabs my left hand, my chest rises and falls rapidly. I hear the quiet creak and pop of the hinge as Edward opens the lid of the jeweler's box and finally allow myself to look down.
It's not a ring.
Surprised at the disappointment that floods through me, I swallow and stare at the charm inside the box. It's a silver house and key.
"It's perfect," I say, but I don't trust myself to look at him yet, afraid he'll be able to tell that I'm a little letdown. Gently, I pick up the charm and hold it toward him. "Help me put it on the bracelet?"
Snapping the box shut, he puts it back in his pocket and takes the charm, letting go of my left hand to grasp the bracelet hanging from my wrist. He twists it around until he finds an empty space, and then tries to hook the charm on. But every time he gets the clasp open, he loses his grip and it closes again.
He mutters curse words under his breath as we both laugh. Covering his fingers with mine, I help him and in a few seconds, the house and key are hanging from the bracelet – in between the canoe and the rabbit. Twirling the bracelet around, I look at each charm, remember what each one represents.
"I love it," I whisper, my sadness of a few moments ago now overshadowed by joy as I study the newest addition again. Tilting my head up, I smile at him. "It's the house."
"It's our home," he says, bending down to me when I reach for his neck and tug.
"How soon can we kick all these people out of here?" I breathe in his ear.
"Five minutes," he answers eagerly.
"They brought dinner," I remind him, pulling away to look at him.
"Shit. I forgot," he groans, dropping his head back for a moment and then checking his watch. "It's a little after four o'clock now. You start yawning at seven and I'll do the rest."
"Okay," I laugh.
As we turn to walk inside, he wraps his arm around my shoulders, pulling me close and leaning down to speak quietly to me again. "Then get your clothes off and pick a bed. Yours or mine?"
I open the door and walk inside first, looking at him over my shoulder. "I think mine," I answer. "And then yours."
"Stella," he threatens quietly, "you're starting something that I'm going to make sure you finish later."
"Counting on it, Ned," I sigh, holding my hand out behind me. He slides his fingers between mine and I squeeze gently as I pull him along toward the kitchen. "I'm counting on it."
All day Thursday, my stomach is in knots. I drink a little Pepto. I try to work. But I end up spending most of the day staring out my office window while I chew on my thumbnail.
"Nothing yet?" Emmett asks. Swiveling my chair to face him, I shake my head. Sighing, he moves from the doorway into my office and drops into one of the chairs in front of my desk. "Shit. I thought they'd be done by now."
"Me, too," I agree. "You should have gone with Rosalie."
"Nah," he shakes his head. "After she heard that Edward had talked you into staying away, she thought I should hang with you. She didn't want you to be alone all day."
Well, crap. That's gonna make it hard for me to continue harboring bad feelings about her.
"Thanks, Em," I smile.
I fought Edward a little bit when he insisted that I skip Jamie's sentencing today, but I eventually gave in, unwilling to continue looking at the worried expression on his face. Edward and his dad are there though, along with Alice and Jasper, and Rosalie and Jack.
And we haven't heard a damn thing from them all day except "No news yet".
Edward tried to assure me this morning that since Jamie had already agreed to a plea deal, this sentencing was just a formality. Still, knowing how much Jamie tries to manipulate every situation to his advantage, I'm afraid that no news is not good news.
Emmett spends a little more time in my office, helping me go over a presentation I have coming up for a potential client, but I can't concentrate for more than a couple of minutes at a time. Finally, we give up. Em offers to take me for a drink since happy hour is starting at Bobby's. Shaking my head, I tell him I really just want to go home and wait for Edward. I know he understands – and I have a feeling he's going to do the same thing.
As I'm driving, I get a text from Edward and grab my phone to glance at it.
*On my way home.
My stomach drops. The fact that he didn't go into detail – and didn't call – makes me afraid that things didn't go well. I beat him home and go upstairs to change out of my work clothes. As I'm standing in the closet in shorts and a bra, I hear the alarm panel beep and know that he's coming in from the garage. Quickly yanking a t-shirt from its hanger, I slip it over my head as I race out of our room and halfway down the stairs, stopping when I see him.
He's standing in the living room, his back to me, pulling his tie apart. His suit jacket is already laying over the arm of the couch.
"Edward?" I ask hesitantly.
When he turns around, he looks drained, but he smiles slightly. "It's over, baby."
"All of it?"
He nods, sliding the tie from underneath the collar of his shirt and dropping it on top of his coat.
"He got three years and a hefty fine. He'll probably serve about half the time, according to Jack's lawyer," he says, perching on the low back of the couch. "He signed the papers severing his parental rights to Riley, and Jack assured me that James won't bother us again, even after he's released from prison."
Frowning, I walk the rest of the way down the stairs. "How does he–," I begin before Edward interrupts.
"I don't want to know," he sighs, rubbing his hands tiredly across his face. When I stand in front of him, he drops his hands to look at me. "I'm sure Jack is paying him off somehow. I don't really give a shit. I just don't want him to hurt my family again."
Hoping to give comfort, I wrap my arms around him and pull his head forward to rest on my shoulder. "He won't, Ned," I say softly. "He won't be able to hurt Alice or get to Riley."
"Or you," he replies insistently, raising his head. He lifts his hands to span my waist. "I mean you, too, Stel. You're the most important person in my life. You're my family as much as Alice… Riley… Carlisle. You know that, right?"
"Yes," I whisper. I lean forward, resting my forehead against his and closing my eyes. "I know. I feel the same."
For a moment, we are still and silent, our quiet breathing the only sound in the house. When I realize he's breathing faster, I open my eyes to find him staring at me. Slowly, he drags his hands up my sides, and then glides them back down to my hips.
"I need you." He grasps the hem of my shirt and pulls it up as I raise my arms to help.
When he kisses me, it's slow and deep. We take our time undressing each other, using our hands and lips to caress each bit of skin that's uncovered, until we fall together to the couch behind him. As he pushes into me, I keep my gaze locked on his, feeling the connection between us that is so much more than physical.
We move together unhurriedly. Neither of us speaks, but I can feel the tension of the last few days leave our bodies; his eyes are clear and unguarded for the first time since Tuesday. After a moment, he stills and leans down to kiss me, then presses himself impossibly deeper.
"God, Ned," I moan, wrenching my mouth away as I arch my back. "I love you. Please."
"I love you, too," he answers as he pushes up on one arm. With his other hand, he reaches for my leg, holding it tightly against his hip as he thrusts into me powerfully. He keeps his pace slow and steady until I buck underneath him, pulling on his shoulders.
Lowering his chest to mine, he buries his face in my neck, breathing hard… moving faster. When I'm close, I grip him more tightly, crying out as the orgasm bursts through me. He comes right after, groaning loudly against my skin.
We lie motionless as our pounding heartbeats slow, returning to normal. Eventually, he shifts around a bit, but doesn't move off me.
"Stel?"
"Hmm?"
"Do you think it's bad that I was happy today?" he asks thoughtfully. "I sat in that courtroom and watched a man lose everything in his life, but I felt no sorrow. Even knowing that he's Riley's biological father, I couldn't force myself to feel the slightest bit of pity for him."
Reaching up to sink one hand into his hair, I turn my head and kiss the side of his face. "No, Ned. I don't think it's bad," I soothe. "After what he did to Alice and Riley, then what he did to you… Jack… the company… us? I think he's a rat bastard who deserves everything he got."
"Yeah. I feel better just knowing that we won't have to worry about him for a while," he answers. We're quiet for another moment, each lost in our own thoughts, until his stomach growls. Feeling his chest shake with laughter, I smile, too. When he pushes himself up to look at me, I reach up to trace his upturned lips with my thumbs.
"I'm hungry, too," I say. "I was so nervous that I couldn't eat today."
"I took some of your Pepto," he admits. "Twice."
Laughing, I drag him down to kiss me one more time. When we get up, he walks around the couch and pulls on his boxers, and then hands me my underwear and his dress shirt to wear.
"You look cute in my stuff," he remarks as I finish buttoning the shirt and roll back the cuffs. "Maybe I'm not that hungry after all."
"Oh, no, no, no. We're not skipping dinner," I argue, wrapping my arms around his waist. I hug him tightly, then look up at him. "But I could make something that's fast and we can eat in bed."
He doesn't answer, but when he bends down to pick me up, striding purposefully toward the kitchen as I wrap my legs around him, I take it as a sign that he likes my plan.
Two weeks later, we're spending our Saturday looking at furniture – again. It's the fourth time in the last ten days that we've been shopping, and it's the one year anniversary of the day we met. I feel like we've been to almost every store in Seattle. But so far, we haven't been able to agree on anything. And so far, Edward hasn't indicated that he remembers what today is.
"You like this one?" I ask hopefully, standing next to an oak, Mission-style set. It's similar to the set he already has, but has some wrought iron detail work on the headboard.
"Mmm, not really."
"What about that one?"
"Nope. Too contemporary," he replies, wandering away. When I exhale dramatically, he turns back around. "Unless that's what you like."
What I'd like is to not waste another hour in this furniture store. What I'd like is for us to be able to agree on something before I go insane. What I'd like is to rewind my life six days and pretend to love the big, four-poster bed he wanted at a different store. But, instead, I smile at him.
"No, Ned. I didn't want that one either," I say, sighing again. As he turns away again, I look toward the back corner of the store. Seeing something I like, I walk toward it.
The sleigh bed is white and covered by a floral duvet, but it has a really great shape and also comes in a darker wood finish. I check the price tag, open and close the drawers on the nightstand and dresser, and then walk back to stand at the foot of the bed. Standing still, I slide my hands back and forth over the smooth wood, appalled at the tears stinging my eyes. When did this happen to me? When did I become such a hopeless romantic? Why am I teary-eyed in the middle of a furniture store as I imagine spending countless nights – and days – in this bed with Edward? In my peripheral vision, I see him approaching, but I don't turn my head.
"Stel, I'm not really a pink flower kind of guy," he teases quietly, stopping beside me and propping his elbow on my shoulder. He leans a little of his weight on me. "And the white furniture is just too… girly."
I swallow carefully before I answer, hoping to make my voice sound normal. "It comes in cherry wood, too," I say, almost making it to the end of the sentence before my voice cracks.
"What's the matter? Did I upset you?" he asks, immediately pulling me into his arms.
"No," I whisper.
"You like this one?" I nod. "Okay. We'll get it."
"Do you like it? I want you to like it, too." He keeps an arm around me as he looks at the wood swatch, opens the drawers of the dresser, knocks on the headboard.
"Seems sturdy," he declares, trying to make me laugh. It works. "Let's order it and get out of here, yeah? We've got something to celebrate."
"You remember?" I ask, turning to face him.
"Baby, I'll never forget the day you first called me an arrogant semi-asshole," he smiles. Then he leans down to whisper in my ear. "Or the first time you called me Ned."
"You were mad," I smirk.
"That didn't stop you from saying it… over and over," he retorts.
"You got used to it," I laugh.
"I didn't have a choice," he insists, amused. "First you changed my name, and then you changed my life."
"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" I ask, grinning up at him as I repeat the question he asked me a year ago today.
"Best thing that ever happened to me," he answers, bending down to peck my lips. "Hands down."
The furniture salesman who's been trailing us around the store for the last hour suddenly appears beside us, probably sensing that we've made a decision. As I listen to Edward place the order and hear the salesman say it will take about twelve weeks for the furniture to be delivered, I keep thinking the same thing: Ned's the best thing that ever happened to me, too.
"Hey, Jas," I greet, sliding into the opposite side of the restaurant booth. "Sorry I'm late, but I got the contract signed." I beam across the table at him.
He smiles back and nods. "Knew you would, Baby Swan," he remarks. "You're getting to be the best closer McCarty and Whitlock has on staff."
The waitress sets down a platter of nachos in between us, then takes my drink order. I study the menu for a moment. I'm not sure why; I get the same thing every time we come here. After closing the menu and setting it down, I reach for a chip and look up at Jasper.
"Where's everybody else?" I ask, holding my hand across my mouth to hide the food.
"Edward's out of town," he advises, then chuckles.
"That one I knew," I reply, rolling my eyes. I pause to thank the waitress when she sets my drink in front of me. "Rose and Em? Alice?"
"Alice is with Riley at gymnastics class. Rose and Em have something with Jack tonight," he answers. He slumps against the back of the booth.
"So it's just you and me?" I smile, picking up another nacho. It makes me a little happy that I'm getting him to myself tonight.
"Yeah, I guess," he shrugs, then falls silent.
Frowning slightly, I look at Jas while he looks at his pilsner of beer. Something's up with him. But I know him well enough to know that he won't tell me until he's good and ready. So I fill the silence.
I talk about work.
I talk about my dad and Kim.
I talk about buying a new car and, after explaining the furniture shopping odyssey, insist that I'm not taking Edward with me until I've narrowed it down to just a couple of options.
Jas is cooperative – he asks questions, laughs in all the right places, makes a few smartass remarks. But he's not himself. We're finishing our entrees when I lean across the table.
"I'm trying to wait you out," I say quietly. "But I can't stand it anymore. What the hell's going on with you?"
He sighs heavily and reaches into his pocket, then sets a small, black velvet box on the table between us.
"Wha… is that… are you…?" I stammer, reaching for the square box. "Alice?"
He nods tightly, and I lower my eyes and open the lid.
"Oh, God, Jas," I say, my eyes widening when I see the ring. It's a delicate diamond band with a larger round diamond on top. "It's beautiful. She'll love it."
"You think she'll say yes?" he asks, his fearful tone making me raise my eyes back to his.
"You think she won't?"
He shrugs. "I don't know. It's fast. She's been hurt before," he replies, dropping his eyes to the tabletop. "She might be reluctant to take the leap. But I kinda figured… everything with James is settled, at least for the moment. Riley gets out of school soon for the summer. Maybe this would be a convenient time to combine our households."
"What?" I ask, scrunching my face up. I wait until he looks up at me before I continue. "Jas, that's the worst potential proposal I've ever heard. It's not romantic in the slightest."
"Well, what should I say?"
"If you were going to tell her how you really feel, what would you say?"
"That I love her more than anything, and I want her and Riley with me every day," he answers.
Smiling at him, I nod my approval. "That, my friend, is how you propose to the love of your life," I reply, closing the box and holding it toward him. "I'm so happy for you."
"Thanks," he says as he smiles his regular smile for the first time this evening. He sets the box down beside his plate, keeping his hand over it. "What about you? You guys gonna make things official?"
"I don't know, Jas," I admit, leaning forward onto my elbows. "It's the strangest thing. All spring, he asked me to marry him two or three times a week. Then, when I agreed to move in with him, he stopped. Cold turkey. Doesn't even mention it anymore."
"Huh," he says, frowning slightly.
"He's given me jewelry twice since I moved in… in little boxes like that," I declare, nodding at the ring box. I'm surprised at the tone of my voice – I sound angry. "First it was a charm for my bracelet. Then last weekend, on the one year anniversary of the day we met, he took me to the fanciest restaurant in Seattle and laid a box like that on the table. He made me open it myself with my stupid, shaking hands, and I could hardly breathe by the time I saw that these were inside." I raise both index fingers to point at the princess-cut diamond studs he gave me last Saturday.
"Very pretty, sugar," Jas remarks.
"I know they're pretty," I huff, exasperated. "But he keeps faking me out with those little fucking boxes."
To my surprise, Jasper sits back in his side of the booth, laughing hard. I take a sip of my beer, waiting for him to say something, but he doesn't explain.
"What?" I ask, irritated.
"He knows you so well," Jas says, still chuckling. "It took Emmett and me several years to figure out how to handle you."
"How to handle me?"
"How to get you to do what we want you to do," he clarifies.
"And how is that?" Sitting back, I cross my arms over my chest to display my annoyance.
"Plant the seed. Push you as far as you'll go without balking, then back off and let you come around to wanting it on your own."
"Huh?"
"He proposed repeatedly when he knew that you wouldn't take him seriously… knew it was too soon. Now that you guys are moving that way, he's stopped. He's letting you get over your fear. Waiting for you to want him to ask. But he loves you. He'll ask you when he thinks you're ready to say yes."
"I wouldn't have said no the night I agreed to move in," I claim.
"You were ready to say yes? Or you didn't want to say no again?" Jasper's tone is gentle. His eyes are warm and inquisitive… and expecting me to be truthful.
"I don't know," I answer sullenly, shrugging as I lower my eyes.
"Yes, you do."
"I wasn't ready to say yes," I admit. "I'm still scared. But I love him. I want to marry him… someday."
"I know. He knows. Don't rush it."
"Says the guy who's rushing it," I remark sarcastically.
"Baby Swan," he says, sliding out of his side and moving to sit next to me. "I've wanted to get married for years. You know that. I just hadn't found Alice. There's no timetable for you to take the plunge."
"I wasn't freaked like this about marrying Jake," I whisper, voicing my biggest concern. Why am I so scared to marry Edward, but said yes instantly when Jake asked?
"You didn't love Jake this way. He wasn't the right guy."
"He sure wasn't," I mutter, leaning into Jas when he puts his arm around my shoulders.
"This time, you've got the right guy… you'll know when you're ready."
"I want to be ready."
"You will be. I've never seen you as happy as you are with him," he says. "And you know I'm right about this – all of it."
Nodding my agreement, I let my eyes settle on the ring box across the table, trusting that he's right… that someday when I see a box that size, my heart will pound with only joy instead of the mix of joy and terror I felt last week. I just wish I knew when that someday will be.
Three days later, Jas and Alice come over to tell us they're engaged. I hug them both excitedly, feeling nothing but pure happiness for them. They brought a bottle of champagne, and we sit outside drinking until the bottle is gone.
As they leave, Edward and I stand on the porch with our arms around each other.
"I hope they know what they're doing," he says, raising a hand to wave goodbye when they start to drive away. "This is all happening really fast."
Stepping in front of him, I wrap my arms around his neck and look up at him. "You know, Ned, I'm discovering that it's more about the 'who' than the 'when'.
His green eyes roam my face as he nods. "You're right, Stella. You're my who."
"You're my who, too," I laugh, barely able to pucker up when he bends down to kiss me. His deep, answering chuckle makes me sigh as I dig my fingers into his hair, holding him in place as I press my lips to his.
After a minute, he starts to back up, pulling me inside the house – and toward the stairs. I follow willingly… and for the first time in several days, I'm not at all worried about the when.