Exhausted, Henry dragged a chair over to Fish's bedside. Before sitting down, he pressed a gentle kiss to his husband's forehead. He didn't just sit, he collapsed into the chair and slipped his hand into Fish's. The days since Fish's abduction had been exhausting – physically and emotionally. Henry wanted to fall into bed with his arms around his husband and not get out for a week. The weariness permeated his entire body, and if it had substance, Henry was sure it would ooze out of his pores.

For the sake of controlling infection and closing of the wound, doctors had removed the outer edge of Fish's hand, making it appear continuous with his wrist. They'd started him on strong antibiotics. They were confident the infection would be easy to control now that its source was removed. The sores on Fish's groin had a soothing salve applied to them and they were also tending to his dehydration. Physically, they predicted Fish would make a full recovery with the only permanent physical damage the loss of his finger and the outer part of the hand. Perhaps some of the sores would scar. Fish's emotional state was an entirely different story.

When Fish had woken after the surgery, he'd been distressed to the point of hysteria, ranting and raving that none of them were real. Worried he'd injure himself or others, the staff had sedated him. A psychiatrist had questioned Henry, at length, about how his husband had sustained his injuries. Henry had played off Fish's rantings as a poor reaction to anaesthesia. He wasn't as good at the creative PR as Ianto, and he'd been able to tell that the psychiatrist didn't believe him at all.

To Henry's relief, the delusional state did appear to be a reaction to the anaesthesia and medications. When Fish had woken from the forced sedative, he had a firm grasp on reality even if he was a bit jumpy and anxious but that was to be expected. He started at every noise, in particular, the door he insisted be left open. Henry's presence seemed to give him a small measure of peace and Henry made every effort to not stray too far from Fish's hospital bed. Wisely, Fish accepted sedatives and pain relieving medications as they were offered so he did little more than sleep on and off. Henry was not surprised but still dismayed that Fish's sleep was frequently restless. Fish would moan, sob, or cry out, and then wake screaming from nightmares.

When he was awake, Fish didn't speak about his ordeal at all. He didn't ask about the team, or about work, and Henry didn't press the subjects. Earlier, as he'd coaxed Fish to eat some clear broth, he didn't seem willing to speak at all. When he did speak, he only encouraged Henry to go home and rest, but Henry wouldn't leave especially since his presence made Fish so much more at ease.

Even though Fish was safe, he had a long road of recovery ahead of him. Though Henry wouldn't leave his side for a moment of it, he knew he needed to take care of his own health. Though he was immune to sickness, if he became exhausted, he would be no help at all to Fish and his husband needed him. At the moment, Fish was sleeping peacefully and Henry pondered if he would wake him by climbing into the bed with him. He was more concerned that he would startle Fish into a panic. Instead, he closed his eyes, trying to ease the burning.

The sound of a light knock on the door brought his head up. The staff always lightly knocked since Fish became distressed when people entered the room unannounced. He was surprised to see Jack standing in the doorway. None of the team had visited, but Henry had assumed because they had their hands full with Cassie. After glancing at his watch, he said, "Jack? What are you doing here? It is very late."

The fifty-first century man looked weary and there was significant grief in his eyes.

"Jack? Is something the matter?"

"How is he?" Jack asked. His voice was rough.

For now, Henry accepted the change in subject. "They had to remove the outer portion of his hand in order to allow for enough skin and flesh to close the wound, and to make it more aesthetic. The doctors are confident they can control his infection. He was significantly dehydrated, but that has easily improved with fluids. I am far more concerned about his mental state. He is showing signs of severe post-traumatic stress." He nodded at Fish's still form. "This is the first peaceful rest he has had. I believe they have increased his sedative dosage."

At that moment, Fish jerked in his sleep, and inhaled sharply.

"I stand corrected." Henry ran his hand over Fish's arm soothingly. "He is having nightmares, and jumps at every little sound. He practically hyperventilates when someone opens that door unannounced."

"I'm sorry, Henry," Jack said, softly. He crossed to the other side of the bed, and put a small laptop onto the rolling table. "I need to wake him up."

"I beg your pardon?" Henry hissed. He rose to his feet, fighting the urge to shout at Jack for fear of disturbing Fish's rest. "You shall do no such thing! He has been through enough!"

"He invented an experimental program that uses the rift manipulator and some of the alien technology that's fallen through the rift. He set it up to scan the city for rift energy, while simultaneously filtering out the energy from the rift itself. It locks onto the special type of electromagnetic radiation that occurs as rift energy dissipates."

Henry didn't understand what Jack was saying in the slightest and he didn't care. "I hardly think that is an appropriate reason to disturb his recovery. You will leave. Now."

Jack glanced at Fish's face, to ensure he was asleep before he continued. "John's dead, Henry. Cassie's escaped."

"What?"

"John's dead. Cassie killed him while making her escape. I need Fish to find her using this program. Because it's one of his unfinished side projects, no one else in the Hub knows how to use it, and it's our only shot of finding her." Jack opened the laptop and turned it towards Fish.

The Duke was torn between finding his husband's assailant and Hart's murderer, and inflicting further trauma on Fish by forcing him to become involved in work and Cassie when it was the last thing he wanted to discuss. He was saved from the decision. Fish let out a sharp cry. His eyes flew open and his legs flailed. Instinctively, he reached up to his right for Henry.

"I'm here, love," he said, softly. He encircled Fish in his arms, pulling him close. "It was just a dream. We're together. You're safe."

It took several minutes for Fish's breathing to return to normal. When he sat back, he started adjusting the bed to sit up. He looked embarrassed. "Sorry about that, Jack."

"You don't need to apologise, Fish. Ever. How's the hand?" he asked.

"Hurts like bloody hell." He lifted the bandaged hand from the stack of pillows next to him. "They want me to keep it elevated but I have a panic attack every bloody time they try to hang it up from a pole. I haven't even looked at it yet." He swallowed hard and said, "Thanks for rescuing me. For not giving up."

Jack put his hand on Fish's arm. "I'd never give up on you, Fish. Ever."

After a steadying breath, Fish nodded at the laptop. "What do you need me to do?"

"You don't have to if you don't feel up to it..." But Fish gave him an impatient expression and he continued, "Cassie managed to escape. I need you to use your experimental program and locate her by scanning for the decaying rift energy she's giving off."

"That program doesn't work that way, Jack," Fish said, shaking his head. He tried very hard, and failed to hide his anger. He didn't vocalise it, but Jack could hear the bitterness and blame in his voice. "It's not a fucking GPS that will tell you where the nearest bloody Tesco is. It will pick up any decaying rift energy. The whole bloody city practically lights up."

Jack dug into his pocket and passed a piece of paper to his friend. Fish took it and squinted. "Is this what I fucking think it is?"

"It's the formula and the decay constant you've been trying to work out on your own," Jack said. He gestured at the laptop. "And the accompanying factors needed to adjust for organic vs inorganic matter and Cassie's mass."

Fish narrowed his eyes at him. The numbers that Jack was providing him with would allow him to narrow his results down significantly. "Where did you get these?"

"From you," Jack said, flatly.

"How could you get them from me when I haven't figured them out yet?" Fish asked, hotly.

"Yet," Jack said. "You haven't figured them out. Yet."

Fish let out a scoff. He rolled his eyes in a very Ianto-like manner. "So you're just handing me information from my future?"

Despite the fact that Fish was in a fragile state, Jack chose his tone and words carefully. "There are extenuating circumstances here."

Fish noted Jack's expression for the first time, seeing sorrow behind the careful veil of authority.

"What's happened?"

"Fish-"

"Just bloody tell me!"

Jack looked at Henry before he took a deep breath, almost as if he were asking permission to continue. Fish watched the tears well up in their eyes. Henry leaned, taking Fish into his arms protectively, bracing him for what Jack was about to say. "You're both bloody scaring me now!"

"John's dead. Cassie killed him when she escaped."

Fish clenched his jaw, then said, stoically, "Pull that towards me, Henry."

"Joe..."

"Just do it," he said, his voice tight.

Reluctantly, Henry obeyed and helped prop Fish up so he could type. It took him longer than it should have because he was working one handed, but in a few minutes, he'd edited the program with the information Jack had given him. It took him another few minutes to interface the program with Google maps. "Her weight."

"Seventy kilograms, give or take."

Fish inputted the number and then let out a disgusted snort. He turned the laptop to Jack. "There she is."

"Thank you, Fish." Jack closed the laptop. He swept it up in his arms and then turned away in a swirl of grey wool.

"Do something for me when you find her, Jack?"

He stopped and turned back, waiting.

Fish said, darkly, "You let Evie take the gloves off."

Jack looked at him as if he'd never seen him before. Fish didn't notice. He was too busy tugging Henry into the bed with him.

"I'll kindly ask you to leave, Captain," Henry said, a chill in his voice.

Without another word, Jack walked out of the room and Henry was glad to see the back of him. He wrapped his arms around Fish and drew him in close. He put a pillow on his side so Fish could rest his injured hand on it.

"Shh, it's all right, love." Henry tried to soothe him, nuzzling Fish's head with his cheek. "Hush. You're safe."

In a low, quiet voice that wasn't steady, Fish said, "I thought about you all the time. The only thing I wanted was to get back to you."

"Hush, love," Henry said, squeezing him tightly. "You don't need to talk about it yet."

"I would've given anything to hear your voice again. Hear you tell me you love me," he begged, his voice cracking a little.

Henry hooked his finger under Fish's chin, lifting his head so he could stare into his eyes. "I love you, Joe. Now and always."

Fish closed his eyes and the tears ran down his cheeks.

"I love you. I love you so very much." He repeated those words, softly, over and over again.

Without opening his eyes, Fish let himself lean forward, slowly, knowing Henry would meet him halfway. It wasn't the first kiss they'd shared since their reunion, but it was the first one that wasn't tainted with desperation. This kiss was soft and full and unhurried. The relief and love overwhelmed them both and soon Fish's cheeks weren't the only ones damp with tears. Just the feel and warmth of Henry's body against his brought him immense comfort.

"I never thought I'd see you again," Fish said with a sob.

"Hush," Henry said, trying to chase the words away. He could feel the emotional anguish through the arms he had around his lover. He tried to soak up the hurt and pain, to take them into himself with a comforting embrace.

"I did a lot of thinking when I was alone on that ship. And I've been doing a lot of thinking today." He swallowed hard and the tremble in his voice deepened. "She was drugging me, stinging me with some sort of hallucinogenic venom. I... saw things."

Henry's arms tightened around him.

"Sometimes I'd relive the past." He lowered his voice. "Like the day my Dad died. Then the day my Mum died."

Henry gently began rocking Fish back and forth. He stroked his fingertips over Fish's hair and face.

"It wasn't all bad," Fish said, his voice strengthening and steadying. Henry felt Fish's cheek warm under his fingers as his husband blushed. "I got to relive all of our high points."

Fish pulled back from Henry's embrace. "Some of it was real, and some of it wasn't. It was just dreams my mind invented, I guess." He dropped his eyes. "Sometimes, the fantasies were wonderful, I didn't want to leave them."

"Your mind attempted to make the best of a horrid situation."

"I tried to stay strong," he said, shaking his head. "But sometimes what my mind dreamt up was better. I think the fantasies helped," he said, calmly. They stayed silent for a few minutes then Fish said, "I'm sorry, Henry. But even after everything... I can't leave Torchwood-"

"You mustn't be hasty, Joe."

"-but I can't stay either," Fish finished over him.

"We'll sort this together," he said. He tightened his arms and kissed the top of Fish's head. "Nothing need be decided now. We have time to discuss things when you're more recovered."

"There is something that we don't need to discuss."

"Don't?" Henry asked, thinking his husband had misspoken.

Fish tilted his head back to gaze into Henry's eyes. "I'm going to ask Jack for an extended leave of absence. Six months at least. Possibly closer to a year."

Though Henry tried to hide it, Fish could tell he was pleased. He captured Fish's lips in a gentle kiss. When they broke apart, Fish cleared his throat, a little nervous. "There was something else I hoped we could discuss."

"What's that, Joe?" he asked, sitting back a bit.

"I want you to promise me something first."

"All right…"

"I want you to promise me that if this isn't something you want, that you'll tell me. I need for us to be able to discuss this honestly. I don't want you to agree just because you don't want to say no to me."

"I-"

"I'm serious, Henry. You think you hide it well, but a lot of the time you do things just to keep the peace or give in to make me happy. We don't have a lot of time together and you don't want us to quarrel, I get it. You spoil me and that's sweet, but just not with this. Okay?"

Henry didn't deny Fish's assessment. "I promise, love."

Fish took a deep breath. He licked his lips, nervous. He couldn't believe he was suggesting this and he had no idea how Henry would react. "I never thought about us in terms of where we were going or what sort of life I wanted to have with you because of Torchwood. I was always headed to the same place and I was okay with that. I just wanted to have every moment we could. I never wanted more, because what was the point? I didn't realise I was doing it until now and I'm sorry for that."

"You don't have to-"

"Let me finish." He stopped Henry's words with a small kiss. "The thing is... I want more. And I'm sorry I never talked about it with you first. You've always let me lead because my days are the numbered ones. And I've always taken that for granted."

"I told you that I will follow you anywhere, Joe," Henry said. "Whether it is figurative or not."

"I know." Fish shifted in a way that was almost a fidget. "One hallucination really shook me up and I haven't been able to get it out of my mind since."

"What happened, love?" Henry asked, deeply concerned.

"We were together... and we were a family. You and me... and our son..." Fish's voice cracked on the last word. He swallowed back the tears. "I know it's impossible but he was ours. He had your green eyes and my wavy hair. His name was Gabriel." He stopped, pulling back the tears. The boy had been so beautiful. He took a deep breath trying to remind himself that Gabriel had not been real, but he still felt the loss. The hallucination had been one of the happiest experiences of Fish's life. "I never wanted to be a father. I always told myself it was because I liked doing what I liked to do when I liked to do it, that I was too selfish for it. I just wasn't the paternal sort. I didn't want to add to an overpopulated world. I told myself a lot of reasons." He shook his head and added, under his breath, "Bunch of bollocks."

He cleared his throat. "Truth is, I'm scared, Henry. I'm afraid of failing because being responsible for someone so completely is just too much for me. My parents were my world and when they died, my world ended. It shattered who I was and how I looked at everything. I couldn't imagine meaning that much to someone else. But now…"

"Now you are reconsidering," Henry said.

Fish nodded and a deeply pensive look came over Henry's face. Was it something he could do? Could he raise a child with this man and then watch that child grow, wither and die? His son Tom was an adult, nearing his forties. The thought of Tom's inevitable death clenched a fist on his heart that made it hard for him to breathe. But this was something his love wanted, he could see it in his eyes. Fish didn't miss the pain flickering in Henry's eyes.

"You promised, Henry."

The pensive look returned to his face and he remained silent for a while. When he spoke, he did so very slowly and deliberately. "I am... apprehensive."

Fish squeezed him hard. "It's all right. It's just an idea. I'm not even sure it's something I want. It's something I've certainly never considered before. I'm just throwing it out there for now."

Henry nodded. He closed his eyes and settled against his husband. Images swirled in his mind. Fish bent over a swaddled infant, a bottle in his hand. Dancing with a little girl standing on his feet. Blowing out candles on a cake with a young boy. How could he deny his husband the full spectrum of human experience? The years he's had with Tom were the best of his life. Now he understood why Fish had exacted the promise from him. Fish understood Henry's desire to shield his heart from inevitable pain and loss. But Henry had come a long way. In those images, there was no pain. He saw only joy in watching Fish nurture and love. He saw a lineage that he could cherish and protect when Fish was…

"I am not saying no," Henry promised, "but we have much to discuss."

"Yeah, we do." Then Fish suggested, "How about we visit Anna for a couple months or maybe a year, and talk about it all?"

Henry smiled and said, "That sounds perfect."