Thanks to everyone who read, fav'd, alerted and to , Tabloid Teen, sarahmichellegellarfan1, connorfrantastic and guests "Scarlett" (my first stories weren't good either! We all have to start somewhere ;) As for anything else - I completely agree with you!) and "Chloe" (Oops, I didn't catch that! My bad! But the more I think on it, the more I like the line. Not for what it says about Thor, but for what it says about Eirlys) for reviewing!

Forbidden

We slept in my bed that night, for probably the first time ever. He did not say why - indeed, he did not say anything at all about the matter. Instead of turning for his chambers, he strut towards mine as if there had never been another option.
I did not protest. I was entirely too tired to question his motives and I did not mind sleeping in my own bed for a change.

The new day dawned as bright as the one before and the irony was still poignant. The air around us felt heavy from the moment I woke. Loki was still sleeping, but even in dreams, his mind seemed plagued.

I shimmied out of the sheets as quietly as possible, but the first few taps of my bare feet on the cold floor pulled him from his rest. He groaned behind me and shifted beneath the blankets.

"How late is it?" he asked, his voice laden with sleep.

"Still early," I said. The sun had only just risen over the hilltops. "Go back to sleep."

Loki groaned again and pushed his hair out of his face. It spilled in sharp contrast over my light sheets as he shook his head. "I have to get up," he murmured. "I'm the king."

Hopefully, in his sleepy haze, he did not notice the clenching of my heart at his words. There he was, our king, both body and soul exhausted before his rule had properly begun.

"No one needs a king who can't keep his eyes open," I said gently. "Get some rest."

He heeded my advise, I supposed, as best he could. He closed his eyes again and seemed to be resting, though he did not get back to sleep. I felt more than saw him gradually waking up while I moved silently about the room, dressing and arranging for the day.
When I had finished my braids, he would not be contained any longer. Loki sat up and moved about the room and I watched him in the mirror.

Once he, too, was dressed, he kept on pacing. Yesterday, most of what had bothered him had been based on sadness. Today, he seemed more angry than anything.
When at last, I could not take the build-up any longer, I decided to speak up and distract him.

"We should tell Mother," I said. "About us, I mean."

He froze on the spot at my words and turned to glare at me. I met his eyes in the mirror. "No," he said through clenched teeth.

I raised an eyebrow at that. "You might be willing to keep up this charade for all eternity," I said. "But I am not. We need to tell her eventually, might as well now."

As a matter of fact, I thought this was the perfect moment to tell her the truth. Right now, she was in the wrong. She was the one who had to make amends for her continued lies - if there ever was a moment to break a harsh truth, it was in this very moment. When our own wrongdoings were outweighed by hers and when Father was not their to crush our skulls.

Loki walked towards me and I finally turned to face him properly. "What, pray tell, do you think will happen? Will she be happy for us and with her behind us, we can tell the whole realm the truth? Is that your plan?" he demanded. "Let me tell you, it won't be like that!"

I scoffed - I hated it when he acted as if I was dumb. I was not, not the slightest bit. Our options were more than limited; but while he had brooded through the night, I had found a scenario that would serve us rather than hurt us.
"Look," I said. "If we made your parentage public-"

"I am king," he said pointedly. "If we admit to the truth, I have no claim to the throne whatsoever."

I chewed on my bottom lip while he resumed his pacing in front of me. Perhaps he would eventually wander a hole into the light blue carpets. The maids would not be pleased with that at all.

"I know," I said. "But if you think about it - with Thor gone and you out of the equation-"

He hissed dangerously, but I refused to be silenced. I had a plan, a good one if I might say so myself, and I at least deserved to be heard out. Neither of us liked the situation and it would not be good in a long while, but we had to take our chances while we still could. That was, before Thor returned - I did not doubt that he would, eventually. He was our parents' favourite, after all.

"Look, with Thor gone, I would be heiress to the throne," I said. "The only option. And whoever marries me will be king."

His eyes went wide at that. I had never thought to ever see him taken by surprise, but here it was. These days seemed to be full of such occasions. It surprised me, in turn, that he had never thought of this possibility.

"You would marry me to put me on the throne?" he asked. His voice sounded suddenly hollow.

"It's not the only throne we can put you on," I said carefully. I was already treading on thin ice, but I feared I was about to break it. "You'd be the legitimate heir to the throne of Jotunheim-"

Our connection was not needed to recognize his annoyance - it was written plainly on his face and his breath left him in a huff. Loki glared at me and when I did not back off, his lips twisted into a cruel sneer.

"You truly are Odin's daughter," he said.

It was insulting at best, like a slap in the face, but it did little to sway me. Odin was a terrible father, but he had managed to keep Asgard largely peaceful and prosperous and never had the power of the realm shaken since he had defeated the Frost Giants. At least, it seemed our father was an apt politician.

"His plan might have been reprehensible, but you cannot deny it bears some political beauty," I said. "We could conquer a whole realm without a single drop of blood spilled..."

His tongue darted out to lick over his lips. "I would not mind spilling Jotun blood."

"I'd mind spilling Asgardian blood, though," I retorted. I realized my mistake immediately - for a short moment, it felt as though my insides were twisting and then he was suddenly numb again. He had cut off our connection, yet again, and I still did not know how he did it.

"Of course," he seethed and I also realized that this was not the time to ask him magic questions. Before I could correct it, he had walked wide out of reach, stomping slightly like a petulant child. He stopped in the middle of the room and pointed at me as if for dramatic effect. "I will not be bound to you because of a political whim."

His words stung, but my voice luckily remained calm when I answered him. "You speak in rage. Once you calm down, you'll see I am right."

Loki did not move when I got up and approached him slowly, as you would a wild deer. It was hard to say how he would react, when he had cut himself off from me, and I did not know what would set him off.
By the time I reached him, he had sagged slightly, the tension seeping off of him slowly. I reached out for him and my fingers travelled tentatively along his arms.

"I love you," I said. "And that doesn't change, no matter who we tell or who sits on a throne or if we ever make this official or not."

"Eirlys-"

"I am merely," I interrupted him. "Suggesting a way in which we will even gain something from all this mess. So think about it."

I did not know if he could still feel my emotions when he broke the connection or if it went both ways, but just in case, I tried to focus on the love I felt for him, tried to pour out every bit of affection I had. My love was the only thing I had to fix his problems and though it was not much, perhaps it was enough. I desperately hoped so.

Loki smiled wryly and relief flooded through me at the sight. "I never thought you would be the one to propose," he teased. "Not sure I like it."

I nodded, mesmerized by this new outbreak of good humour. "I'll give you a chance to do it properly," I offered. "I promise I'll even act surprised."

I dropped by Father's chambers after parting with Loki only to find things unchanged. Mother was still glued to his side, stroking his hand or his hair, frowning all the while.
She finally managed to whisper out an apology. It would take a good while longer, I figured, until I could completely forgive her, but the woman I saw here, worrying over her husband, was not one I wanted to argue with.

Apparently, my parents had expected the sleep to come for a long while, but Mother was still surprised by the suddenness of the ordeal. The last time my father had fallen into Odinsleep had been centuries ago and my memory was fuzzy, but Mother had counted on him being able to give warning and lie down by himself.

"He's put it off too long," she told me. "I worry he won't wake up again."

Perhaps I was a monster, but I did not feel too bad about that. At least, with him gone, he would never try to marry me off again. He would never lie and manipulate again. He would never be able to make either me or Loki feel inferior and he would not be able to commit such foolishness again as to put Thor on the throne.

I left the dim presence of my mother and headed for the kitchens when my stomach reminded me, rather loudly, that I had not eaten in a long while.
I found the kitchens in a state of chaos. It took me several minutes to locate the cook and the head-maid, in passionate debate on whether or not the warriors would be fed today. They only stopped when I tipped the cook on the shoulder and rather loudly announced that of course business would be running as usual.

"While you're at it," I added. "I'm sure the king would want for his breakfast to be delivered. My brother hasn't eaten for too long already."

For once, rumour seemed not to have travelled faster than me and my words caused the whole kitchen to erupt in hurried whispers and incredulous gaps. The head-maid paled in front of my very eyes while the cook continued to nod hurriedly.

A critically raised eyebrow and a bit of ushering later, the staff had managed to both hurry out with a tablet for Loki and procure some bread and fruit for myself.
It was there, in the middle of the kitchen, watching everyone fall back into routine, where Sif and the Warrior's Three found me.

The moment the maids spotted Volstagg, they brought him a plate bursting full of ham and a jug of ale. Much to my surprise, he turned both of the offers down. Fandral, though, picked one of the grapes from my plate and popped it into his mouth with a wink. Sif elbowed him in the stomach.

"Shouldn't you be in the Training Grounds or something?" I asked.

Sif's eyes narrowed at me and she pushed a bit of her jet-black hair out of her face. "Without Thor?" she said. "Hardly!"

I pursed my lips at that. "Well, you'll have to wait long if your training is dependent on his return."

All four of them exchanged a look that was laden with something more than worry about their friend. Hogun's scowl was even more prominent than usual and Sif crossed her arms in front of her chest.
My stomach dropped at the sight. They had already questioned Loki's behaviour yesterday, but now they appeared even more suspicious. It could not be that they had figured out the truth - or could it? What did they think they knew?

"We've just been to see your brother," Fandral said carefully. For once, he was not smiling brightly. "We asked him to bring Thor back."

I picked up my tee cup and swirled the liquid slightly within it. "What did he say?"

Not that I had any doubt as to what Loki had said. Sif gave me a look that told me she also knew I was only pretending. Surely, she could not have believed that Thor would be brought back, and so quickly at that?

"Look," Fandral said and sat down next to me. "We think that Loki might have had something to do with the Jotun attack and that's why he doesn't want to bring Thor back."

When Loki felt that an unfortunate truth was exposed, his features always evened out. For me, likewise for our mother, it was a tell-tale sign that we had hit the nail on the head, even though most people never saw beyond the facade.
I could only hope that I had a similar skill, because if the clenching of my insides was displayed on my face, there would be no doubt, even for someone as simple minded as Fandral.

"I told you once, I'll tell you a thousand times," I said, praying to the Norns that they would not notice the shaking of my voice. "Banishing Thor is the right thing to do - Odin has cast him out for a reason and it is not our place to questions this decision. And if you honestly think that Loki would do such a thing as to betray us all, then you are the traitors and you can count yourselves lucky if I don't report you."

Sif groaned loudly. "Okay," she said. "We get it. All hail King Loki."

She was buzzing with energy, and I supposed it was the same outraged wish for action that I, too, felt when I thought about what my parents had done. It was the kind of outrage that made you want to punch someone, to fight, to just do something.
Obviously, Sif could not be allowed to put that kind of energy into action and so I attempted to smooth things over. Perhaps, if they believed that Thor might come back one day, they would not be as opposed to the current situation. Maybe they would even stop investigating.

"I'm sure Loki will do his very best in ruling this realm," I said. "And maybe we can bring our brother back one day. Just now is not the time."

Sif shook her head with an ugly sneer and Hogun pulled a face that showed he did not believe me. Volstagg, too, was watching me with content, but at least Fandral attempted a smile in my direction.

"I see," he said. "Thanks for your help, Eirlys."

I just so resisted the urge to hiss at him. He slipped from the bench and the four of them made their way back out of the kitchen. Since they had been with him before, Loki probably already knew, but I would have to warn him of their suspicions, anyway. Their loyalty to Thor was dangerous and the last thing we needed right now was to bring him back. We would have to find a solution for those people.

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