AHHHHH! It's PEOPLE!
Hehe... yeah, I back. With chapter 26 locked and loaded. But, uh, before we continue our tale, there were questions from the audience. I figured I'd just answer them here...
Yes. The original plan was for the assassin to play some kind of major role here, ultimately giving Claire her memories which were actually taken for her role as the Silver Ninja. I wanted Zander to be some kind of ally. However, I got a suggestion from a guest saying that an idea for later could be giving Claire some competition with another girl. This, in itself, would have been too similar to the love triangles going on in this series. So, I revised it and said the competition would probably take place with Lloyd and another boy... hence this and the previous chapter. That, folks, was the moment I came up with the brother idea. So, thanks for asking, and to guest, thanks for suggesting :D
Now, enough of my endless talking. On with the story.
Chapter 26
No POV
It had been a day. Not really much when regarding the number of events that can happen in that time, but to the inhabitants on the Bounty, it felt like an eternity. They spent most of it without Claire, seeing as she was still obtaining her memories. When she did in fact wake up, she requested to be alone. No one could blame her, especially Zander. She had just recalled her childhood, which, from what they had heard, was terrible. They figured the girl was probably very scared and confused. So, they left her alone.
But, after about an hour without seeing her, two boys became very anxious.
Zander was most definitely worried for Claire. Of course, he wanted her to have the truth; she deserved that much. However, he had taken those memories for a reason. A reason in which no other child her age should have to experience. So, he couldn't help but worry. Inside her bedroom, he had no clue what this was doing to her.
Lloyd too was on edge. Though Claire claimed to no longer want to be with him, this didn't stop him from thinking about her throughout the whole day. Kai claimed it was just his mind trying to get over her, and that he'd be normal again soon, but Lloyd was quite convinced that something was happening inside that room. Now, he knew it wasn't his business, however, the thought of her becoming someone other than the girl he loved, frightened him. The boy knew if that happened, he'd never have a chance at getting her back.
And, what made the situation worse was seeing how the other was stressing out over Claire's well-being.
When Zander first saw Lloyd around Claire's room, he wanted to do something other than pass him by. While he was very mature at heart, the former assassin didn't like Lloyd one bit. He decided that by the first conversation with him. The Green Ninja, to him, was ungrateful, controlling, rude, and had a persona that clearly said that everyone should worship and adore his existence. What made Claire fall in love with that guy, was beyond him. However, he wanted Claire to think of him as a somewhat supportive brother. This was one of the main reasons why he had asked Claire to consider her relationship with Lloyd. After all, she did look quite happy with him. But, to everyone's surprise, that did not happen. And, Zander was relieved that she broke the relationship off. So yes. Zander did not approve of Lloyd one bit.
Lloyd on the other hand did do something other than let Zander walk by. Everyone aboard the Bounty could pick up on the fact that their brother did not appreciate Zander's presence. And, it was clear that Lloyd was not buying into Zander's 'excuse'. To him, the older boy was still an assassin, using some kind of magic to get to Claire. Because, there was no way that she'd forgive that guy and not him. Lloyd didn't necessarily start a fight at the sight of the assassin, but his words were quite spiteful. This did in fact start a pretty unfriendly conversation. One that Claire didn't fail to notice.
Neither of them knew that inside her room, Claire had topics other than her memories on her mind. Instead, her head was spiraling in a million different directions.
Her relationship with Lloyd was not an ugly one. Though they did fight a lot, she found it purely beautiful. It was something that she wanted to last forever. And, even after the incident in the street, she was sure that he'd redeem himself somehow and they'd go back to normal. That's what she was planning on doing. And, what broke her heart was not only the fact that they were no longer together, but the look on his face after what she said. Claire knew he cared. She knew that he meant no harm. That he was honestly trying to protect her. That's why the look on his face made her whole world crumble.
It was her that had convinced him three months ago to not give up until they knew for sure that the prophecy couldn't be avoided. It was her that gave him hope. That assured him she'd never try to deliberately make his heart shatter. They were both frail then. And, they needed each other to make it through life.
She felt awful about what she did. Because after everything they'd experienced, she came to depend on him. Just as he came to depend on her. And, she wanted to take it all back. Though, something was stopping her.
It was Zander.
Claire couldn't remember every memory in complete detail, but she knew enough. It was always Zander that looked after her. Every time her parents wanted to turn their rage on her, Zander stepped in. She'd often find him crying afterwards. And, he'd often yell at her for not being careful. For causing him physical harm... but, she now knew that she was the only thing he had to hold on to. No matter how much he said that he hated her back then, she always knew that he never meant it. He loved her. He truly did.
Claire still loved Lloyd... but, she couldn't forget Zander.
And, after hearing what they'd say and do to each other when she's not around, the girl was thoroughly convinced that she'd have to choose. Though she couldn't. Now, her heart belonged to both of them.
Her solution: She was never leaving that room.
Unfortunately, her peers had other plans. A knock on the door made her heart stop...
"Claire?" A calming voice asked, hoping that the girl would open the door. It was Misako.
While Claire really didn't want to talk to Lloyd's mother, it would seem rude if she gave no reply. And, she had to admit, that Misako's company was enjoyable.
So, the girl let the elderly woman in.
"Hey, Misako." The ginger replied, shyly, trying, and failing, to avoid the green eyes that looked nearly identical to Lloyd's.
Misako, ever the clever one, immediately picked up on Claire's distress. "I hope I'm not bothering you... Everyone is just so worried."
Claire faked a genuine smile, nodding. "Yeah. I'm good. Slight headache, you know? It's, um, a lot to take in..."
Misako nodded as well, knowing almost immediately that the young girl was lying. "Well, I wanted to let you know that Zane was kind enough to make dinner, with the help of both Jay and Nya. I think you can guess who wants to know if you'd be up for eating... Or, is your headache an extreme bother?"
Claire was flushed, embarrassed for trying to lie. By Misako's tone she now knew that it was impossible to lie to your elders.
"I-I don't know. It hurts... a lot."
The woman's eyebrow raised, causing Claire to look down at the floor.
"Things have changed so fast, Misako. Zander's here... Lloyd and I, well... and, now, I can remember so much from my childhood. I'm still trying to make sense of it and what it means for me..."
"… and you think that being all alone in a room will give you exactly what you need?"
Claire shook her head. "I just need... time. I wanted these memories so what I could become stronger. Before this, I was just too dependent on others, especially Lloyd..."
"Is that why you broke up with him?"
Once again, Claire's head was shaking, though, she wanted just to hide in the room again. All of these questions were too much for her. "You know why I did what I did. Everyone knows, and I think he knows too."
Misako gently smiled, placing a hand on Claire's cheek with a softened expression. "I know what you tell yourself. And, perhaps I know what you don't want to admit... in time, you would have forgiven him... both you and I know it. You did what you did because you had already found that independence you so desire. And you wanted to prove to everyone that it was there..."
"How did you...?"
"Claire, I never appreciated your company because you and my son were together... I appreciated your company because I truly love you. As a character. I think you brought out the good in Lloyd, and I also feel as if being with him has made you feel better. These past few months you've seemed at peace with both your surroundings and yourself. Though you've been trying to stop the prophecy, the thought of it hasn't brought you down yet. I admire that. Because, really, when I look at you I see the girl I used to be. Young. Lively. Strong-willed. A little difficult. Stubborn," The ginger teen giggled at the last one. No matter how much she hated being called stubborn... it really was true, "And, just like me, you wanted to show everyone that you're not just a girl. You broke up with my son, not because you were mad, but because you wanted to show him and everyone else that you could make it without him. That you don't need him, and never depended on him for anything. Do correct me if I'm wrong."
Claire couldn't believe what she was hearing. Sure, maybe she was mad at Lloyd. But, now that she thought about it, Misako was right. Too right.
This wasn't fair. Not to Lloyd. Not to Claire herself. And, not to Misako. So, why had she done it? It didn't have to be him. She could have picked anyone, really. But she used him. Because her anger and her need to be the Silver Ninja that destiny wanted her to be blinded her. Lloyd was a person... one who loved her. The one who'd helped her through high and low. And yet, in her attempts to show everyone that she didn't need help from anyone, she had toyed with his emotions. Using them to her advantage. Almost like what he did to her. Yet, this felt worse. She hadn't made a life changing deal on his behalf, but she had taken his feelings for her just to crush them in front of him. To make a stupid point. Unfair was the understatement of the century.
And, now, she had only made things more difficult.
"Misako," The girl whimpered in realization, "What do I do?"
She wanted to cry again. That's what she really wanted to do. If it was just her and Lloyd, this would be so much simpler. She'd just apologize for overreacting. And for manipulating him, while he'd do the same. Within the course of a few days it's possible they'd move on like nothing happened. Yet, now, Zander clearly had a part in this. There was no way she'd be able to get back with Lloyd if he and Zander couldn't maintain a relationship as well. The only reason they were fighting at the current moment is because Claire had caused everyone to believe she was done with Lloyd. With no intentions of ever going back to him. There was nothing holding back Lloyd's anger for Zander and Zander's anger for Lloyd.
And, honestly, Claire wasn't sure there'd ever be a way to fix that. They hated each other. It was clear that that wouldn't change.
"Mabe you should ask Nya..." Misako ventured, removing her hand from Claire cheek. "You never know what advice she might have to offer..."
"W-What would Nya know about this. I don't know what to do to fix what I did. And in just a few hours it's only gotten worse..."
The woman bit her lip, debating whether or not to reveal something quite personal about Nya in order to calm Claire down. In the end, that wouldn't look good for the two girls. And, that was the last thing Claire needed.
But, it was clear that the young girl needed something.
"I am in no position to tell... but even if she cannot shed some light on the subject, from what I've seen, she will support you no matter what."
The ginger's head lowered in thought as she slowly came to terms with Misako's suggestion. It couldn't hurt, right?
"Thanks, Misako... I really-"
The girl, at that moment, was interrupted by an angry shout coming halfway across the ship.
"ALRIGHT PEOPLE! WHO ATE ALL THE MARSHMALLOW CEREAL! I SWEAR THAT I LIVE WITH RUFFIANS!"
This made both women giggle lightheartedly, despite the tension that had started to build up in recent moments. It was clear that even in the face of the drama that happened to always take place on the Bounty, Jay would still be himself. Freaking out over really nothing at all. In this case... cereal... before dinner.
"Actually, Misako. Dinner sounds nice. I'll come out soon... just..."
"Give it some time. I know." With that, the elder walked away, her footsteps seeming light against the wood of their home. Claire smiled as soon as she was gone, grateful that their conversation hadn't been too awkward or strained. She felt for sure Misako would hate her for what she did to her son. However, Misako had handled it quite well. Even if she was biased, that hadn't seemed to show. It was enough for Claire...
With a few steady breaths, she walked over to the mirror that she shared with Nya, looking over the pictures neatly arranged around the frame. There in the center one was her, Nya, and Skylor all sitting in the branches of a cherry blossom, white flakes coating their hair and illuminating their smiles.
That day had been wonderful.
After convincing Wu to allow the girls a weekend off, they'd decided to visit a nice area in Ignacia, Nya's old hometown. They had ended up with practically a whole album of pictures... Most of which were taken at the Winter Festival they held every year. Apparently, the event lasted for about a week, and the group had done as much as they could before they had to go back to their training. This made the weekend much more chaotic than necessary... but, Claire had to admit, it really was a calming getaway.
Despite this, she still missed Lloyd. In every picture the girl was in, you could see it in her eyes. That, even though their vacation was two days long, she couldn't stand the short amount of time without him.
And, apparently, when she got back, he told her that he felt the same.
Claire looked away from the girl she saw in the picture, focusing on another one... this one having Lloyd in it.
It was one of their more recent dates, actually. He had led her down to Crystal Falls... a cliffside with a small cove and, of course, a waterfall. Over there, it wasn't as cold, and they were able to go swimming. Just him and her.
Claire remembered his dare... he told her to jump from the cliff and into the water without the help of elemental powers. She said no, in a slight fear that something would go wrong. And, when she wasn't looking, Lloyd had come up behind her to push her, following after her.
In the end... the outcome wasn't that bad. They took that picture as they were laughing their heads off on the shore, soaking wet and freezing.
But... she loved that memory. It was one of her favorites with him. And, she silently hoped there would be more like that. Because, Claire remembered when that picture was taken she just knew there'd be more. There had to be. She remembered that feeling of knowing the rest of her life would be with him.
Now... both he and she had messed up. And, now, memories like that were just out of her reach.
With a small sigh... she reached out and grabbed the black frame of the picture, looking it over. It was indeed her and him in that photograph, yet, for some reason, she didn't feel as if that Claire was even her anymore. This Claire was completely oblivious to the lie that she had been fed. This Claire had decided that even though something felt off about Lloyd's behavior everything was alright. Everything would be fine...
Why had she thought that? What, with her luck, nothing turned out fine. Even a relationship that most people would die for.
Maybe then she'd thought that she was lucky. The girl had the boy of her dreams. Two amazing friends. An accepting and quite hilarious team who treated her as family, a Sensei whom had done so much right for her, a woman who felt like a mother, and hopefully would be someday...
But, now, looking back on everything that she could recall, apparently all of that luck had been a lie. Everything, in fact, seemed like a lie...
The boy of her dreams had deceived her. Now they were farther apart than she could possibly bear. Her Sensei had kept something of value away from her for years, which pained her to think about. An assassin had turned out to be related to her, while her sister was still a hateful and cruel being. Now, because of the arrival of their new guest, everyone seemed divided. On edge. Torn over the decision that Lloyd had kept from them all. And that mother in which she had hoped to have could no longer be just that. Instead she was just another woman who could offer her advice.
In reality, she wasn't fortunate at all. Luck didn't seem to exist in her life.
Gently, Claire slipped the photo out of its frame holding it over the trash can, fingers in a position to ruin the memory. One that probably wasn't even real anyways...
However, after a moment of silence, Claire realized that she couldn't do it. She couldn't destroy it.
Instead, she slipped it into the case of her pillow, promising to get rid of it later. She just wanted to look at it one last time before she actually did so.
Then, walking over to the door, she looked back at the room and all of the memories it contained before closing the door with a silent click. The sound felt miserable, and the emptiness that this hallway held made her eyes water in longing.
She had wanted to be independent. To be strong enough to work alone. Without anyone's help.
And that's just what she had proved to everyone.
Little did she know that it would cost her the relationship in which she and Lloyd had worked so hard to build. And it cost her the gratefulness that she held for her life and its perfection. It cost her the life she thought she had in general. Everything she thought was hers... gone.
Now, because of her decision, she really was all alone.
Except, this is not the way that she wanted it to be.
Why did you think I was qualified enough to do this?
Her fingers softly grazed the wall in which she walked by, as she thought this...
I'm not the great hero that you want. Why did you pick me? Out of everyone?
Claire desperately wanted an answer. She wanted the answer to all of this. This-This riddle that her life had become. A jumble of nonsense that had to be decoded in order to proceed onto another one. She wanted a solution; a way out of all of this.
But, it's not like she'd ever get a reply. Claire always had to figure stuff out on her own...
"… because, dirtclod... it's magic... and it brainwashes people into doing their bidding..." Claire could hear Jay whisper-yell. Sure enough, as she leaned against the doorframe, unseen, everyone was fanned out across the room, eating their food. Except Lloyd. He sat in the corner of the room, eyes lowered and just picking at the rice.
The girl felt a wave a guilt start to drown over her as she saw his expression... the same, brokenhearted one in which he had before.
First Spinjitzu Master, I'm an awful human being. First his dad and now me... brokenhearted must not even begin to describe how he's feeling.
"But Jay," Zane stated, in an obvious state of confusion mixed with disagreement, "You have eaten this particular cereal for a decent amount of time. I do not think your brain has been... washed."
Jay scoffed, flinging an unused spoon in Kai's general direction.
"Your buzzkill attitude is rubbing off on the poor guy. Stop whatever it is you are teaching him."
"Oh sure. Blame me. If anything, Cole's the most buzzkill out of all of us."
"Hey, leave me out of this, Red!"
"Don't call me that."
"I'll call you what I want..."
Jay, amidst all of this, was bouncing with probably laughter and excitement.
"See Zane! Brainwashed! They're enemies now!"
"SHUT IT, JAY!"
The blue ninja, however, became doubled over in chaotic laughter as Kai and Cole became indulged further in an argument... from what Claire could tell, who had the manliest toothpaste.
Admittedly, she was amused by their antics, once again, and soon joined in on Jay's laughter, all the while still hoping she wouldn't be seen for some time.
Unfortunately, Nya abruptly stood up, upon seeing her friend in the doorway.
Pretty soon, everyone else caught on, and the room became silent. Claire looked down, feeling bad for ruining their fun moment. All she had to do was walk into a room and things became hushed.
Whereas a day ago things were different.
Claire felt so... serious all of a sudden. It was weird. Normally she'd be the 'life of the party', as Jay liked to put it. And, she loved that side of her. Finding good in the bad things and laughing in spite of danger was just her thing.
As all eyes fell on her, Claire forced her lips into a smile, hoping to let them know without words that things were still okay. She was still herself. The same Claire as before.
Even though she wasn't. Even though nothing was the same as before.
"I... wanted to see who ate the cereal." She chuckled, letting her smile grow somewhat wider.
This, apparently was enough confirmation for the group, and Jay immediately pointed a finger at Cole. "That backstabbing-"
"Nooooo. Don't you finish that sentence zaptrap. Bad things will happen-"
"-little... UGH! " her blue-clad friend then turned to Claire. "Bad things will happen, he said. NOTHING is WORSE than eating ALL THE FREAKING CEREAL! What will we have for BREAKFAST?!"
"Yes, our day is ruined." Cole commented sardonically.
"I could possibly awaken earlier to make blueberry pancakes for everyone. If that is what you all desire."
Zane's words resulted in wide eyes, and bright smiles throughout the group.
"ZANE! I take back everything I said! Buzzkill or not, you MAKE those pancakes!"
"I mean, blueberry pancakes beat Jay's marshmallow cereal anyday." Cole ended up agreeing, ignoring Jay, who started sticking out his tongue in the earth Ninja's general direction.
Claire shook her head in some amusement at their banter. Though this 'issue' was ridiculous, they'd had much, much worse. She could have shuddered at the memories.
"Yoooou dorks..." Claire mumbled, with a genuine smile. Honestly, living with these guys was great. They were a nice getaway... and... more of an excuse to laugh. It felt nice.
However, as she was brought back to reality, only to notice Lloyd stand up and exit the room, her heart dropped with guilt again. He looked like every sign of life was ripped out of him, moving in such a hopelessly stoic way.
And she was the one who did it.
Yet, no one else seemed to notice his disappearance. This, in itself, broke her even more.
There had to be a way to fix this.
Her eyes scanned the room, taking in everything she could get. The details, the memories, and most importantly, the inhabitants.
For the first time, Claire felt as if she was unable to trust. Everything wasn't as it really seemed. They laughed, but it felt as though they were plotting. They smiled, but it felt as if they were harboring hatred. They teased, though, it felt as if they were insulting.
And, in almost an instant, she felt cold. Empty. As if the world around her ceased to exist... instead, in its place, a dark void.
Her breathing sped up as that feeling surrounded her body, fueling her. It felt as if she was harnessing a new kind of energy. Something more powerful. Something dangerous.
And she liked it.
For a few moments, Claire stared at her hands, flinging around a few familiar strands of silver. This time, however, something was different. Her silver powers seemed to be strengthened by this- this new feeling
In reality, she was in awe. The girl felt stronger. Like she could do anything she wanted.
It was amazing.
But, almost as quickly as it came, it was gone.
Claire blinked, realizing she was on the floor, five figures above her, the closest one being her brother.
He looked at her with concern... and words were flooding out of his mouth. The girl's eyes narrowed, trying to interpret what he was saying.
Luckily, after a few beats of utter nonsense, she was able to hear a soft 'are you okay'
"I'm... fine." The girl grunted, moving to sit upright.
Everyone else sighed in relief at this.
"You had us worried." Cole commented, kneeling down next to Zander.
"Yeah, it was really weird. One moment you were just standing there in the doorway, seeming okay and perfectly normal, the next, you start mumbling some nonsense language and BAM... you fall to the ground." Jay added, helping Nya in assisting the girl off the floor.
"Nonsense language?"
A few nods arose, making the girl go silent.
She herself had no clue what happened. All she remembered was going cold for what could have only been a few seconds. The feeling itself was not what she'd call satisfying... but, for some reason... she had found a strange attraction for it. The adrenaline it gave her, sparking a new level to her Silver Powers... the ones in which she knew pretty much nothing about.
But what caused the difference? Surely something must have triggered that sensation inside of her. Surely it hadn't just appeared for no reason.
"Claire?" A voice asked. The girl looked up at the sound of her given name, taken out of her daze. It was Zander in front of her now. And, he no longer looked concerned. He looked serious... like he knew something had happened as well. "I don't know what you saw in there, but it wasn't good... Are you sure you're fine?"
Claire couldn't lie to him. For some reason, it felt as though he'd be able to see right through her. Wu always had. And, it was never in her best interest to lie. She'd never had any reason to.
But, now, she felt that moral slowly slip away.
There was conflict in her head, now. She was torn. And so was her mind. Her normally clear mind now whispered other options. She could lie. She should lie. It was as if she had found a new part of herself entirely. And this new part wanted to do things differently.
So she lied.
"I'm fine." She said again, barely above a whisper.
As soon as she'd done so... she felt like a new person entirely. This wasn't like her. Claire wasn't obsessed with any kind of power. She already knew what she possessed. And quite frankly, what she already possessed terrified her. She avoided using those powers as much as possible.
But that feeling...
The new voice in her head sent a shiver down her spine. Something wasn't right about this.
It's probably just the aftershock of those memories... She told herself, shaking off that unsure feeling.
His grip on her shoulders tightened, and his look became deeper. "Are you absolutely sure?"
"Yes! For goodness sakes, guys! I said I'm FINE!"
This shocked everyone, even Claire. Her tone was not only angry but almost sounded... loathing.
She found herself shaking her head. "I- Does anyone know where I can find Lloyd?"
Claire could have smacked herself. It was in situations like this where the first person she'd want to see was Lloyd himself. But, thanks to her stupid mistake, asking a question like this would be considered weird.
We're connected. Maybe this has something to do with him.
No one answered her.
"Fine," she sighed, "I'll find him myself."
And, really, doing just that, wasn't that hard. He was in the most predictable spot ever.
Oh, Lloyd, she thought to herself as she knowingly watched him whack everything he could on the training course. The boy looked so out of focus... obviously bothered. She remembered how Cole once told her that he always used to be so serious about his training. At least until she came along... apparently, he changed when he found something desirable in her.
He thinks he's lost to me, now... that he'll never get me back
As crazy as that thought would be, it'd probably be true. Three months ago, Lloyd had been just as willing to let her go, for fear that he'd hurt himself and her again... it was the side of him that she wished didn't have to exist in him. That she feared would drive him someday.
It scared her to think that he'd never try and put himself out there again. His heart was a beautiful thing... but, due to the pressure of his life, and the horrors of his life, he often never showed his true emotions. Claire always thought of it as a mask. One that he always seemed to wear when he was hurting.
And sometimes he'd mask himself by taking out his hurt on the training course.
She waited patiently by the door, not wanting to bother him, but wanting him to know that she was there. There were things that had to be said... and she wasn't leaving until one, they were said and two, he agreed to at least try to attempt at giving himself another shot. The guy deserved that much.
Luckily, his angered movements seemed to slow a little, and he bent over, drawing in hoarse, slow breaths.
"Lloyd..." Claire started, seeing her chance.
"Don't..." He interrupted, flatly. At this, he went right back to hacking his katana at every object that came his way.
"Don't what?" She asked, crossing her arms impatiently. She refused to leave, despite whatever he said, until he started acting like a human again.
"Don't... say it."
"Say what?"
He grunted, ducking as a mace swung at his head.
"Say something along the lines of 'I was wrong. I want you back. And I forgive you'… because that'd be absolutely wrong."
She shifted her weight to her other foot, slightly irritated. Stubborn as he was, how was anyone supposed to respond to this? The guy who was clearly extremely torn up about his mistake and wanted her back just as much as she did was trying to deliberately convince her that he shouldn't be forgiven. Ironically, this was the good side of him. The one she'd always appreciated. Because this was the side that was always looking out for people's best interest...
And now she had to fight with it.
"Well, I do want you back, but..."
"And don't apologize, Claire. You didn't do anything."
But I did. I promised to keep your heart safe, then I broke it in front of everyone just to show that I didn't need you... Tell me that isn't wrong.
"Lloyd..." She sighed walking up to him with a gentle air. Every move he made with that sword was reckless, uncontrolled. But, he wouldn't hurt her. Lloyd might have considered himself a danger for everyone... the person who caused the loop of angst, however, he had yet to see that physical harm had never happened. In fact, as she stepped in front of him, the boy stopped, looking into her eyes with some kind of plea.
Ignoring this, she slowly but surely slipped the sword out of his grip, tossing it to the side of the room with a clang.
Looking up at him, she realized his eyes were now locked on the wall, deep in thought. Still, he didn't say anything. And it was at about this point that she was supposed to make some kind of move.
Not wanting to overwhelm him, her arms moved to his neck, pulling her smaller figure into his for a hug. She fit perfectly here... and sometimes it was hard to leave.
The girl, after a moment of awkwardly holding this position, finally felt his form loosen up, resting his chin on her head and wrapping his arms around her waist. Of course, he kept it light, probably out of a fixed mindset that his last chance was up and all he'd ever be to her was just another friend. This, is what made her pull away...
"You think I deserve better... I think you deserve better..." After tucking a strand of his hair behind his ear, she smiled, holding that hand against his face... "When are we ever going to realize that we just belong together?"
He, however, didn't return any smile. Any sign of emotion was wiped away from his expression.
"Lloyd Montgomery Garmadon, what's going on with us?"
Lloyd shook his head. "I lied about something I never should have. I made a stupid deal with your brother because I didn't ever want him to interfere with us... I don't know... how about that? I mean, you said it yourself that what we had wasn't even a happy relationship. Heck, with a lie that size, I wouldn't even call it real."
She wanted to smack her past self. And him... just to knock some sense into him.
"You think our whole relationship stemmed from some kind of manipulation?"
"Um... no? B-But it was a part of it..."
"So then, who cares? Our relationship wasn't a lie, Lloyd. It was founded on real feelings for each other. And my real feelings for you never came from a lie..."
"It came from a color..."
She rolled her eyes at that reference.
"Regardless of where those feelings came from, the fact of the matter is... I hate seeing you like this. And, I just want to see you being you again... Okay?"
Both of them became silent once again... that is... before Lloyd drew in a breath.
"No."
The word made her go still. And, Claire, found herself scared of what he might say.
"Lloyd..." The ginger started, before he interrupted.
"All of it was because of me, and you know it. This," the boy gestured around the room, "is the way I try to punish myself... Sometimes I can't help it, but, it needs to happen. I can't allow myself to move on."
Claire nodded, slightly disappointed at this. Really, this was all his decision, and there was nothing she could do.
So this is it... was the thought than ran through her head as Lloyd put even more distance in between them. It felt so wrong. She was the one that had broken-up in the first place. She'd been fine with it in those moments... but, now, as she was trying to convince him to stop being so hung up over her and to just try again, he was now expressing his disinterest in being in a relationship with her again. All of the three months in which they had built something she found purely amazing... gone... just like that.
"I'm sorry." The blonde finished. "I know how hard it was to come in here, and try to at least convince me to give myself another shot... but, I think you understand that these things go just as quickly as they come."
Claire was horrified at the thought. She had been led to believe there was no such thing as falling out of love. And, her heart yearned for that far away truth in this moment.
"I understand..." The girl choked, despite the words being a lie. Lloyd really was handling this well. Like the gentleman he was. If he was actually confirming that her earlier decision to break up was the right one, he deserved some respect. This wasn't meant to hurt her, like she had so foolishly done. This was him looking out for their futures. There was no way he'd stay with her if he believed they actually stood a chance in the future.
Hurt as it did, this probably was for the best.
Still, she couldn't stop the few tears that came flowing down her face, causing him to embrace her. Except, this hug felt different. It was not full of love and compassion. It did not feel like the kind of hug that he had embraced her with on the night the assassin, in the form of her brother, came. No... this one held back some emotion. It was the kind of hug she and her other teammates would share. The same kind of hug she'd often get from Zane. Or even sometimes Jay.
This hug was the real confirmation that whatever they were before today... was gone.
Now, he was just a friend.
Lloyd pulled back, looking intently into her eyes. "What we had before happened too quick... and it resulted in both of us getting hurt. Maybe someday... we can go back... For now, I think you and I both need some distance. And time."
She nodded, looking down at her inability to speak. But, he wasn't done yet. Claire didn't even have time to contemplate what to say when his hand cupped her cheek, pulling her in for a soft kiss. It surprised her... especially since this was supposed to be their goodbye... but she soon understood that this was the goodbye. A kiss of all things. Because the first one they shared had been what started this relationship. It was only proper that they'd share one to end it.
Claire relished as much of it as she could, knowing this was her final chance to show him how grateful she really was for everything he'd done for her. Everything he'd showed her. Hopefully, he'd be able to see that even the small thoughtful moments in which they had experienced were never taken for granted. That she loved every moment with him.
And, all too soon, their goodbyes were said. All too soon, they broke apart, standing there, taking in the details of each other's eyes. There had been so many moments in which they had done so... and, standing there, they were reliving each one. Those memories would be all that they would ever have of each other from now on. Because, after this, it was clear that from now on, the memories they'd make together would never be the same as what they once were.
They would no longer be the memories of two lovers...
Clearing her throat, she offered him a hand, one in which he shook without hesitation. And, when they wordlessly pulled apart, Claire turned to walk away. But not before stopping again.
"I won't forget what we had, Lloyd..."
Lloyd smiled in return. "Nor will I."
And, just like that, he was farther than he'd ever felt. Like a distant island, thousands of miles away. Without his presence in her heart, she felt incomplete... not whole.
At least they'd ended it on good terms. From the way Nya talked about break-ups, Claire always feared that one of their many arguments would mark the end of their relationship. Instead, the situation in which Lloyd had put them in, brought her some sense of peace. The end of what she had loved became something civil. And, the relationship in which they had, deserved that much. She was glad it had ended that way.
But, now, there was a sense of dread starting to take over. That kiss in which they had shared, haunted her. Torturing her with the fact that moments like that really were out of her reach. There was no doubt that Lloyd felt the same... however, turning back wasn't an option. They'd both accepted this, and, now, they had to live with the consequences.
Claire only hoped the pain she was feeling right now wouldn't be in vain.
Merry early Christmas everyone! Ho, boy, this was a chapter to write, I'll tell you that. Nothing too significant happened, other than a slight change progression with the plot (you will see what I mean) … other than that, this chapter as simply just Claire's reflections on the time that she and Lloyd had spent together. Yeah, I added a little Misako and Claire heart-to-heart, as well as some slight LloydXClaire fluff. Sad fluff, but hopefully still just as cute.
Uhm... shout outs to those who reviewed: EnergyBlast Diamond, Tex1412, BatGarmidone, Llyodenia, BedazzleDewdrops, and rbrill345 :D My day was made thanks to all you folks... and more thanks to rbrill345, TheJediLover, and Tex1412 for following/favoriting... I really appreciate the support!
EB: Why thank you XD just a question: define a bit beyond lady-like. Cause I'll tell you now, that very soon, this girl will be entitled to her own actions and opinion. Going from polite and reserved to full out reckless, wild, and her form of 'independent'. I'm just looking forward to it. And, I hope this explains that 'sudden saltiness'. It wasn't actually her mad at him. She was just irritated in general.
Tex1412: Continued, just like you asked XD
Llyodenia: Honestly, I love all of these chapters more than my life. They've BECOME my life. Thanks for the review!
BedazzleDewdrops: I explained at the beginning of the chapter, but, just to answer your question, I'll say it again. The memory stuff was planned, the brother stuff came to me after I started writing DH early on. Hehe, I like the jelly thing too. And, the jealousy factor was only briefly brushed on this chapter, but, it's pretty much the main point of the next upcoming works of art XD And, thanks for your quote...
rbrill345: Our hearts should be breaking for this girl here too. And, yup, she does realize he only wants the best for both of them. That was just overshadowed by her desire for independence. And, by all means, do not trust him. Also, thanks for the compliment :D
Sorry for those who probably can't review now that I posted that author's note. But, PMs are always available. Feel free to comment on there if need be! I'd really appreciate it XD Peace out!
~Rain