Title: To Be Whole
Author: MizutaniTony
Game: Mass Effect
characters/pairing: Garrus/FemShep
Disclaimer: Owned by Bioware
So it looks like you guys have enjoyed 25, that's good. Sorry the next few chapters will be short but again, I'm working with newer stuff, primarily about Leela but I'm just trying to figure her out a little more that's all. And I apparently fell into some very old, and very bad habits when writing this one….hence it took much longer to edit. *sighs* and I'm certain a couple of people heard about it as well. not my best chapter
So...here ya go guys.
Chapter 26
There are few places in her life Leela had ever felt truly pressed she had no trouble telling anyone that she would always felt safest in her bed. Whether it was her lumpy one aboard the Normandy, or the one in her mother's quarters, she never had trouble falling asleep. Whether it was alone during a firefight or curled up next to Garrus, when she fell asleep she always felt safe.
It was when she was asleep that things went to hell, when she became vulnerable.
When she was asleep she couldn't fight them; the memories that would come flooding back. Her childhood, Akuze, the Blitz, Sovereign;every night she would be haunted by these memories. Some nights she would wake up in a cold sweat, gasping for breath. Other nights, she would find herself buried in her mother's chest, her face stained with tears. Then, there were the nights she'd wake up shouting for him only to remember she was alone with only Boo, her hamster, for company.
Last night had been such a night. She'd come home, showered, and gone to bed just as she had every night. This time hoping that she'd get a good night's sleep, but it never came. It ended up as it normally nose filled with the smell of rotting flesh, and her ears echoed with the sounds of people's screams as enemy forces lay waste to them. It was only thanks to the blaring sound of her alarm that she was saved from having to see their faces pleading for her to save them.
Her eyes snapped open and immediately began scanning the room for any sign of intrusion. Reaching over, she shut off her alarm and let out a sigh of relief when she heard nothing but the sound of Boo's wheel squeaking. Satisfied with the conditions her room, she opened up her omni-tool and flipped to her itinerary, finding it empty for the first time since she'd come back from Tuchanka. It had been an interesting trip to say the least, and more trouble than she thought it would be the moment she'd set foot on the newly re-commissioned Nairobi.
Though she'd never officially seen combat, the Nairobi had been found limping near the outer edge of the Sol system nearly six months prior to picking up her most recent passengers up from Tuchanka. Most of her initial crew had survived despite the ship being barely intact. Her weapons had been destroyed and her plating was barely intact. When the ship was found, her crew had gone into temporary stasis to conserve power and oxygen. After they had been woken up, the crew gave their reports about how they had been attacked by a Reaper only to be saved by a red blast of energy.
Once they'd been debriefed, much of the crew had immediately signed up for the task of getting the Nairobi back in fighting shape. Though a little unnecessary, the ship had been retrofitted with the latest equipment thanks to the Council's idea of using the ship as it's newest diplomatic vessel. What would originally have taken almost a year, took only a few months thanks to the zeal expressed by not only the ship's crew but the engineers assigned to it as well. Asari had supplied the luxuries of Thessia and Illium for visitors' quarters. Salarians, Geth, and Quarians offered up tactical instruments and medical equipment. Humans, Turians, and even Krogan offered their help in supplying armaments and defensive equipment. When she was finished, the Nairobi had changed as much on the inside as the people who had worked on her; Brought together by a common cause to help stabilize the peace that had been so hard fought.
From an outsider's perspective, things looked calm, almost serene. Several species coinciding with one another; Krogan delegates were rubbing elbows casually with turians and salarians, joking about what they would do once they got off ship. Asari and humans were discussing the latest news to come in from the outer systems and what they were doing to help in getting them the supplies they needed. Though the peace and unity was strong, it was just as fragile though nearly shattered thanks to the antics of two of the admiral's closest friends.
Since they'd landed on Tuchanka, Kasumi and Liara had been at one another's throats. Neither of them said why, but Leela had her suspicions. Her main theory revolved around Liara jealous that Leela had brought Kasumi along on such a delicate mission. Given the thief's past, Leela could see the problem. Kasumi wasn't necessarily known for being the most loyal person as her loyalty was bought more often than not. Yet, despite Liara's urging to leave Kasumi on Earth, Leela had brought the thief anyway and her trust was well placed.
Kasumi had proven herself more useful than Liara on several occasions thanks to her years of working solo. She was quiet, fast, efficient, and didn't require a team or several steps to achieve her goals. This made her the ideal candidate for gathering the intel needed to strong arm the agreements that Wrex and several of his allies were traveling to the Citadel to present to the Council.
When Leela had explained this to Liara, the asari had taken it as an attack on her character and stormed off in a huff toward her quarters. For several days during the trip, Leela had tried to talk with her friend to explain her reasoning only to be met with silence. One time, Leela had tried using voice altering software she'd gotten from Kasumi. This turned out to be a bad idea as Leela had ended up in a pile on the floor while Liara locked herself in her quarters for the remainder of the trip.
The one time she did leave her room Liara's temper got the better of her and nearly started a war.
Leela had just loaded up her third plate of one of her favorite meals;, a dish consisting of fried chicken, chili sauce mixed with onions and cream of mushroom soup, and a huge pile of rice. She had been certain this wasn't part of the standard menu since there was only one person who knew how to cook this meal. It sent a warm, familiar feeling through her as she took in the scent of the spices. Picking up her knife and fork, she began cutting into the large thigh. She had barely put the meat into her mouth when she heard the ruckus.
Letting out a loud sigh, Leela set down her utensilsexpecting to see a krogan fist fight and instead was met with the sight of Liara standing over Kasumi; teeth bared and biotics flaring. All around them were krogan shouting for them to take their fight to the sparring mat that the soldiers used down in the cargo bay. Sighing, Leela wiped her mouth and tossed her napkin down on the table and headed over to where her friends were.
"All right you two,." sighed Leela, hoping to quell the violence that permeated the air, "you've both had enough fun for the evening."
"I don't think what I have in mind for her could be considered fun, Shepard," seethed Liara, her eyes following the movements of the now recovered thief.
"Liara," whispered Leela taking a step closer to her, "I would strongly advise you to not go through with whatever you have planned for her."
"Don't you dare think you can tell me what to do Shepard," hissed Liara sounding a little too much like Benezia for Leela's taste. "You are not in command of this vessel and I am not a member of your crew; which means you have no power over me."
"You're right," confirmed Leela as she waved to a couple of C-Sec officers that had been watching them. "But they are here to keep the peace and since I'm still a Council Spectre who can speak on their behalf, I am confining you to your quarters for the remainder of our journey."
"You wouldn't dare!." growled Liara, her biotics flaring only to have them quelled by the sound of guns powering up.
"I am, Liara." replied Leela, her voice matching Liara's. "And if you think the Reapers got on my bad side; just wait until you see what happens to those who betray me."
"I'm not betraying you, Shepard." answered Liara, her voice softening, almost pleading with her former love.
"Then go with them,." requested Leela, her fingers softly brushing against Liara's. "Please."
After a few moments of silence, Liara gave a curt nod and left with the guard; head hanging as she entered the lift. When she was gone, the crowd dispersed and Leela turned toward her table, ready to finish her dinner which she was certain was stone cold by now.
"Thanks for running interference Shep," chuckled a voice from behind her.
"Don't worry about it," exhaled Leela, her hands shaking from the small rush of adrenaline still coursing through her veins. "I was just doing what needed to be done."
"That's our Shep." laughed Kasumi clapping her friend on the shoulder. "You sure you're okay?" inquired the thief noticing the shaking in Shepard's shoulder's.
"Adrenaline," grunted Leela, before taking a deep breath to calm her nerves. "Always happens when I think there's going to be a fight."
"I think it's more than that,." smirked Kasumi tapping her nose.
"You're good at your job, Kasumi,." chuckled Leela, stuffing her hands in her pockets. "But this is dangerous ground you're stepping into."
"Don't worry about me, Shep." laughed Kasumi with a small bow, "I know when to mind my own business. Although," continued the thief pulling a flask from her belt, "I also know when it's time to let loose."
"Thanks Kasumi," smiled Leela with a quick glance at the flask, "but I'm trying to cut back."
"Fair enough," sighed the thief turning on her heel as she shook the flask above her head, "you know where to find me if you change your mind."
When her friend was gone, Leela sauntered back to her table only to find her food as hot as it was when she'd received it. Glancing around she found no one paying attention to her table and simply shrugged as she sat down, digging in again as she took in her surroundings. Despite everything that had happened before the war, Leela felt good about the geth functional again. Itwas wasn't as strange a sight as she'd originally thought it would be; seeing them up and interacting with everyone. Whenever she looked at one, she was reminded of Legion and the sacrifice that he made.
With EDI, it was different. She saw no body, heard nothing about her, and no one mentioned her. Every time she saw a picture of the Normandy, one of the first things she'd think about was her friend.
She remembered how she'd explained humanity and life to EDI; about how she could find a way to be happy with Joker, the way that humans ate, the ability to tell a joke, or in some cases why humans seemed attracted to the members of the other alien species, particularly the specifics of her and Garrus. The conversations were endless, which made pulling the trigger that much more painful.
The fact that with a single finger, she'd once again ended the lives of innocents. Her thoughts drifted to the moments before the she made that final decision. The one that had changed things forever as everyone knew it. She hated that presumptuous, narrow minded, logic driven, condescending quasi-childlike thing with every fiber of her being. What the fuckgave them the right to dictate who should live and who should die?! That wasn't a decision for anyone, never mind any species, to make. It was then that she already knew what her decision was. It was simple but required a small amount of relative sacrifice. In the end, she survived; they survived and thrived in spite of it.
"But we showed you, didn't we you little fuck?" whispered Leela into the darkness of her room, a small smile spreading across her face before quickly disappearing ; knowing that getting her hopes up could probably do more harm than good.
If there was one thing she could agree with the Catalyst on, it was that to be an organic meant that destruction was how they thrived. Leela was a living example of that. Her hands were no cleaner than the next soldier's; even dirtier considering the decisions that had been placed before her. But she had had faith in her choice, and she was certain that even though things were bad now, they would get better.
She rested her head against the pillows, momentarily content with the way things were going. During her work with the Council after her return, she had seen the damage that had been wrought on several planets and . Tthe amount of lives that were still in the process of recovering from the war. It'd take decades to repair the damage; maybe even longer and while her position was more symbolic than anything, the power it granted her gave her the ability to help those in need when she could as fast as she could.
"Shit." she groaned rubbing the final bits of sleep from her eyes.
Her thoughts were now plagued by the most recent reports of her supply shipments not arriving on time. Deciding it best to contact the captain of the latest ship she'd commissioned, Leela started to sit up only to be slammed back into the mattress by a bony fist. Coughing loudly, Leela turned on her head to see a large black blob that wasn't there when she went to bed. Covering her eyes, she reached over and turned on her lamp. After letting her eyes adjust, she let out a loud groan and palmed her forehead when she saw what lay next to her. On the bed, resting on top of the covers with her hair sprawled out all over her like a second pillow, was a lightly snoring, tattooed, scarred, and incredibly naked Jack.
"Oh what the fu..." Leela started.
"Shut the fuck up, Shaun," muttered the dozing Jack absently wiping a bit of droolfrom her chin.
Shaun?thought Leela her interest piqued.
"Hey, Jack," whispered Leela scooting a bit closer; tracingher finger along her friend's spine, "Time to wake up."
"Go away," growled the biotic sleepily.
"Or what?" cooed Leela as she draped her arm over her friend's body.
"Or I'll...HOLY FUCK!" screamed Jack as her eyes took in Leela for the first time. "SHEPARD, WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY BED?!"
"Me?" retorted Leela, separatingfrom her friend and hitting her in the face with a pillow. "What the hell are you doing in mybed?"
"Your bed?!" snapped Jack, kicking at Leela only to fall off the bed instead and land with a loud thud. "What the hell happened to my wall?"
"Told you," laughed Leela as she watched her sheet's twist in the dim light of her lamp.
"Oh fuck you," snarled Jack from the floor as she tried to unwind her way out of the sheets.
"I thought that was Shaun's job?" jabbed Leela watching as her friend finally managed to free herself from her linen prison.
"What are you talking about?" barked Jack pulling her underwear back on.
"You kept mentioning some guy named, Shaun." answered Leela,thumbing through one of her books she had grabbed off the nightstand next to her.
"He's no one." said Jack, a little too hastily to be true.
"Right," laughed Leela only to receive a biotic blast to the side of the head. "What the fuck?!"
"Oh quit your bitching," snorted Jack zipping up her pants. "I've seen you take worse and..."
The biotic's words suddenly turned to hoarse gasps as Leela's arms wrapped around her throat.
"You're goddamn right I've taken worse," laughed Leela in her friend's ears. "You've gotten soft, Jack."
"No I haven't, Shepard." gasped Jack solidly planting her elbow into her friend's stomach loosening her Leela's grip on her throat.
"That was sneaky," Leela inhaled sharply, stumbling backward.
"I wasn't aware this fight had any rules," smirked Jack throwing a punch at her friend.
"Just the way I like it," gruntedLeela, grabbing her friend's hand in her arm; the momentum of Jack's punch giving Leela the leverage she needed to toss her friend over her shoulder.
"Not today." laughed Jack as she twisted in the mid-air, wrenching her arm from Leela's grip before slamming her biotically padded heel hitting the commander in the head.
A jolt of pain shot through Leela's head, but did little to dizzy her thanks to the implanted metal plate in her head courtesy of Cerberus.
"You gotta be shitting me!." growled Jack in surprise when Leela rebounded virtually unfazed.
"Metal plates , dumb ass." sneered Leela pointing to her head only seconds before she felt the wind knocked out of her when Jack's foot collided with her solar plexus.
"More reason to knock you on your ass with all those Cerberus parts still in you," jeered Jack as her elbow rammed into Leela's lower jaw. Suddenly, she felt the all too familiar sensation of a quickly created biotic barrier deflect her blow.
"What the fuck?" barked Jack as she felt her elbow bounce back harmlessly.
"Fist fight," smirked Leela as her fist met Jacks face, splitting her lip, "so anything goes."
"You're not playing by the rules?" laughed Jack catching Leela off guard with an all too familiar right cross, "Sexy."
"You're so sweet," grinned Leela as she spat out a bit of blood before countering with a left hook to her friend's jaw.
"You bitch!" snarled Jack wiping the blood from her lip.
"Again with compliments," laughed Leela; her arm cocked back in preparation for the final blow.
"What the fuck is going on in here?!" demanded an all too familiar voice.
Eyes growing wide and simultaneously mouthing 'Oh shit'; they both dropped their arms and turned to look at the doorway. Standing with a cocked hip and arms folded, Hannah glared daggers at the younger women waiting for an explanation.
"She started it." answered Jack pointing an accusatory finger at Leela.
"Bullshit!" snapped Leela; her fingers instinctively forming a fist,. "You're the one who threw the first blow!"
"Well you're the one who kicked me out of the bed!" countered Jack; her biotics flaring out of instinct.
"Your ass shouldn't have been in my bed anyway you delinquent!"
"BOTH OF YOU SHUT UP!" shouted Hannah stopping the argument. "You!" she said pointing at the tattooed biotic, "My bathroom, showered, and dressed in ten."
"But..." began Jack.
"NOW JACK!" barked Hannah pointing at the door.
Without a word, the biotic shoved her way past Leela and kept her eyes on the floor as she passed Hannah.
"Your..."
"Shut up, Leela," growled Hannah, her red eyes boring into her daughter,"just shut up and get your ass ready. Breakfast will be ready in fifteen."
Half an hour later, Leela was sitting at the table poking absent mindedly at her pancakes while her mother went over paper work and Jack played with her mother's six month old tuxedo kitten, Buster. Buster had other ideas and kept wandering to walk all over Hannah's work. Finally Hannah gave up, setting her work aside and the two women began to play and talk about the small feline. As her mother and Jack talked, Leela's mind drifted back toward the shower.
The water had been a godsend and helped to dull the lumps and bruises that were beginning to form on her body. They were minor annoyances compared to the other thing that had been taken from her that morning besides sleeping in. The shower had lately become one of the few safe havens she'd had to think privately about certain things. Those thoughts allowed her to forget about reality for a while and just concentrate on not only the person that she wanted, needed.
"Leela?" interrupted Hannah in the same voice she had used when she interrupted Leela during a rather private momentin the shower, "I asked you a question."
"What?!" snipped Leela, prodding her pancake violently with her fork.
"I said 'what plans do you have for today?'" repeated her mother, returning her attention to her own pancakes.
Shifting in her seat, Leela took a bite of her pancake before answering, "All my meetings were canceled and Kaidan's gone on a trip with his mother so I'll probably just request a truck and head into town for awhile."
"Sounds like a plan," her mother said with a smile. "What about you, Jack?'
"I got nothing going on today," laughed the biotic as the kitten licked at her syrup covered finger. "So, I thought I'd just wing it."
"Why don't you two hang out?" recommended Hannah over the rim of her mug. "See if you two can't get rid of all that excess energy into something more constructive than turning each other into bloody pulps."
"How do you suggest we do that?" scoffed Leela glowering at Jack who paid her no attention.
"I don't know," replied her mother through a piece of melon she'd gotten from the bowl on the table. "Maybe hit the shooting range or..."
"Oh that's smart," snorted Leela, her old injury making her nose whistle loudly. "We get into a fist fight and you want us to go to a place where we shoot things."
"Watch your tone," warned Hannah, her eyes narrowing at her daughter.
"Yeah, Leela." snickered Jack as Buster tried to climb up onto her shoulder. "Watch your tone."
"Fuck you." muttered Leela, removing herself from the table and placing her dishes in the sink.
"I thought that was Garrus' job?" asked Jack shooting a knowing look at Leela. "Or have you resorted to a vibrating means of satisfying yourself?"
"It may vibrate but it packs more of a punch than your bony little fist," countered Leela grabbing her canteen from the fridge.
"Yeah well, at least I didn't have to rely on shots to grow my tits," laughed Jack; still playing with the kitten; unaware that Leela had picked up her plate.
Suddenly, she grunted and gasped sharply as she felt the slimy, sticky, half-eaten pile of fried, syrup soaked starch slam into her chest.
"What the fuck was that for?!"
"Leela! What the hell is the matter with you" demanded Hannah, doing her best to hide her oncoming smile while Jack shot a venomous look at her former commander
"I just thought she could use a little help," replied Leela as she chewed happily on a piece of melon
"The fuck do you mean help," snapped Jack trying her best to pull the pancakes away from her chest.
"Well you see, Jack." began Leela walking up behind her friend and pulling her into a tight hug; the syrup and pancakes soaking into their skin. "While I may have had to get shots to grow mine, they're still bigger than yours Bisquick Tits."