26
Gabrielle lay peacefully sleeping curled around the larger woman on the bed and while Xena was unable to sleep herself because her own thoughts were a constant round of niggling and a bothersome buzzing in her head she not wanting to disturb the bard lay for more than a candlemark staring into the darkness of the bedroom and watched a spider spinning a web in the corner of the shuttered window and tried to work out a viable plan of action.
She had given her word to Nicolo in order to get Solan out of jail and leave Amphipolis and take him back to his home in the Centaur village before he got into any more trouble. Not just to get him away from the other warriors hanging around but also because Cyrene had taken more than a passing interest in the teenager since she had seen him in the fight behind the Inn and the ticklish issue of the truth about Solan's parentage was also playing on her mind. Should she remove him from under her mother's scrutiny or come clean and finally admit the truth about him to both mother and son and she could just imagine what sort of reation would come from that particular revalation?
And would Gabrielle be able to take on the journey with them or would she rather stay behind at the inn with her mother? On top of which there was also the added risk of the raiders of the caravan and who were still lurking in the vercinity. Were they waiting possibly for the right moment to launch a full on attack on Amphipolis or just content to fall on any unwary traveler to add to her headache. She knew nothing about them or what they might do and there were just too many veriables and so many other factors to consider and just too many possiblities to go wrong that she couldnt plan for the warrior thought as the hours passed slowly by. Ideas, plans, she hadnt come up with one.
It was almost dawn when Gabrielle finally stretched and opened her eyes and she lifted her head from the soft cushion that she had been resting on and realised she was laying on a breast. More specificly a right breast and and very close to a raised nipple. It had been over a moon cycle since she had been so close let alone touching anyone that she stiffened unnerved at what she had done unwittingly in her sleep and she looked up disoriented and met the mezmerising blue eyes of the warrior.
" Hey it's ok Gabrielle it's only me." Xena said gently.
" Right, yes ofcourse did I ? did you ? sorry did I disturb you? "
Oh for the love of Zeus calm down. Xena thought and her mouth quirked as she barely stopped herself from rolling her eyes." No really I am fine. Look Gabrielle it is not a problem."
The bard rose looking thoughtful and then dead straight at Xena." Oh that's good right sure, you just surprised me, I was asleep. How long have you been awake ? Did you sleep well ? Gods I must have had the best night's sleep since, since I don't know when, you know I had a really beautiful dream." Gabrielle coloured slightly and her brows knitted together and she went on." No that is not quite true, because I do know when. Since Onagru. There, I've even managed to say his name and I didn't cringe. I think I must be getting over this now. Gods I need to pee." Xena looked to the candle and strikeing a flint the flame a pale glow lit the room as Gabrielle rolled off and ran to the pot in the corner.
This time Xena couldn't stop herself from eye rolling as she realised how much she had been missing Gabrielle's gift for talking and now here she was babbling more like her old self in the last ten minutes than she had done in the last few weeks but she maintained her gentle tone." What sort of a dream was it ? " Gabrielle grinned crookedly." Fancy, would you believe it, it was a dream of making love, normally that would have just scared me but not this." she laughed a little nervously." Rolling around with... But wasnt it you who said how else am I going to know ? " Had she said that? Xena winced.
Gabrielle suddenly felt her face growing hot as she remembered she had been laying on Xena much like the lovers that they had been before the attack and the heat of it burned her like a brand on her flesh and she began to feel tongue tied again.
Xena saw that she hadnt been taking as much notice as lost in her own thoughts she should have and became aware she was not sure if she was hearing the bard right. " Wait stop a minute are you sure you know what it is you are saying ?
Gabrielle stopped." Do I Know ! Are YOU sure you know what I am saying ? I knew that you were not listening. Xena, I was so scared."
" Gabrielle you are not to blame for this."
" XENA ! "
" No, I MEAN for being scared. Not just about Onagru. It's being afraid, and you hate yourself for that too. I know because I've been that scared too and I hated that."
" Xena you can't make me believe you were scared. It was me that was attacked Xena."
Xena shook her dark mane and held on." Me ofcourse I was scared Gabrielle, I have never been so scared in all my life before. I thought that our life together was over. Oh yeah, scared big time, selfish yes because of what that scum did to you and he had taken your love away and I thought it was over for us.
Nobody deserves to be treated that way and it hurt to think you would never want me near you again, never want me to touch you, or to feel your touch on me again. You always thanked me for saving you but this time I didn't make it, I didn't save you and I feel that I have let you down."
" I don't know if this is the right way to say it and because it's not something that I am proud of. Once I would use sex the same way Onagru did, as a weapon, with no thought or care to any of the men and women I abused and I've been so afraid that you would see me that way. Because with you Gabrielle I had learned to love again. Don't you understand that ? I thought that I would see that same fear in your eyes and that I was going to lose you."
" You don't know it but many times you have saved me Gabrielle. You have helped me, cared for me, healed my wounds and not just the visible ones. You gave me your love. Now it is my turn to help you, care for you Gabrielle and love you."
Gabrielle nodded suddenly aware." After all we've been through how could we...? Gods Xena your right. I never thought of you like that. Don't you know I would have killed myself if not for you and Cyrene." Gabrielle admitted solemnly." I have been so utterly lost and bringing me here, with you two staying by my side when I felt so alone, because of between you I have been able to see my self again."
Gabrielle gave a sob and ran into Xena and was enfolded into her arms in a big hug. The first real touch either had since Gabrielle had been attacked and Xena felt an explosion of feelings that overwhelmed her and she whiped away a tear." By the, it wasnt us it was you Gabrielle, you did all the hard work and refused to give in." Xena said kissing her forehead and face.
" I love you Xena."
" I love you too Gabrielle."
" Forever Xena." Gabrielle began to return kiss for kiss.
" Always Gabrielle."
They held on to each other almost fearful to let go in the silence.
After a moment Gabrielle released her hold and a low rumble emitted from her and she blushed." I'm still hungry though."
" Well at least that's one thing that hasn't changed." Xena said ruefully as she caresed Gabrielle's cheek and she released her to go to the table and began to search for food. " Is there some fruit, an apple perhaps." The bard picked up one of the bags.
" It's still a bit early to call for breakfast yet." Xena said." Yeah I suppose." Gabrielle shrugged then she let out a startled cry as she found Jan's 'gift' amongst the bits of jewelery and she jumped back at the very real looking male member. Xena almost let out a laugh but not wanting to hurt the girl's feelings she held back as it proved the girl's earlier misgivings were not entirly gone.
" It's ok it is just Jan's little thank you." Xena said.
" Little that is not little! if anything it's rather big. What sort of a thing is that to give anyone? " She pointed at it on the table." Why did Jan do that when she knew I was." the bard railed.
" It really wasn't meant that way, this was all that was left of her 21st century life and I guess she gave it because she felt she had no need for it anymore." Xena smirked remembering the man Jan had chosen for her life mate and partner and for one so well set up what would she want with more.
Gabrielle frowned." WHAT you mean it's just a big..."
" Maybe it is that, actually it's a lot better than that. I don't know what it's made of, it's very lifelike I grant you and much softer than ours made of leather and wood, it can come alive too, look I'll show you."
The bard jumped back." Oh great just what we need, a man but not a man? " Xena grimaced at Gabrielle's sarcastic jibe.
" Well the best bits." Xena pulled two batteries from the pack and put them inside then she put it into Gabrielle's hand and turned it on slowly letting her feel the various vibrations through her skin as she slowly speeded it up Gabrielle's eyes widened." It also works to relax you." and Xena her face full of mischief chuckled again.
" WOW ! Did you need relaxing much ? " Gabrielle exclaimed.
" Without you I was very lonely."
Gabrielle saw the mocking glint in Xena's eye." What I'm game if you are ? "
" Yeah I know well sometimes. Sometimes I want it big and thick and a long screw..." Xena cut back she began to make wild hand discriptions and outlandish farcical expressions that Gabrielle began to laugh uproariously and shake a finger at her." You know you can be really crude sometimes." the bard said.
It was good to see her laugh like that Xena thought." I love you I mean I'm in love with you, not just your body but your mind and soul too, I love all of you."
She grew serious again." Gabrielle I want to make what we do as beautiful as in your dream but never without you wanting it too and never before you are ready to understand." Xena said kissing the bard on her forehead and put the thing back in the bag as she heard a noise out in the corridor.
A knock at the door confirmed her of her thoughts and Xena opened it to Cyrene balanceing a tray." I thought I heard you early birds talking did I interupt anything ? " Cyrene said laying the tray on the tab looking from one to the other." Did we wake you sorry." Gabrielle said.
" It's alright I was up anyway. The traders will be wanting to be fed before they go about their business." Cyrene said reminding them that this was her job. Xena blew out the candle and opened the shutters to the rising sun. " Then don't concern yourself with us, you have enough to be doing and we can manage alright."
" I'm sure you can dear my but you are looking tired dear is the bed too soft for you ? "
" She was awake long before me, She couldn't have slept much, something on her mind." Gabrielle said and Xena grimaced and gave the bard a none too gentle nudge. Cyrene turned a critical eye on her offspring." Only the one dear ? She always had difficulty sleeping when there was an unpalatable truth to face."
" Because it usually went along with one of your legendary punishments. Thank you Mother." Xena ground her teeth embarressed and hating that both women were ganging up on her as Cyrene still talked over her head as if she wasn't there.
" You were treated no differently to your brothers, it was only painful when it was truly deserved."
" Painful ? " Gabrielle looked from one to the other.
" That would mean a trip to the woodstore and across mum's knee for a mindful lesson with her wash paddle. Mostly it was being made to work off in the fields or with the smellier livestock." hating when she had to herd pigs hating even the smell of pig Xena growled at the memory and Gabrielle chuckled blushing at the thought of Xena across her mother's knee.
" Would it also have something to do with that boy ? " Cyrene said suddenly.
This was it, the moment of now or never Xena thought. This was the time for her to speak." His name is Solan, and he is you're grandson. I'm sorry I hadn't told you before but there was a safety issue." She grimaced at that, it wasn't entirely true but the excuse would serve.
" So you've decided to tell me after all. I wondered when or if you were going to tell me." Cyrene interjected Xena spun back and her long arms rose to slice the air and exasperatedly came down to slap against her leathered thigh." Mother there wasnt a choice. He does not know who you or I are to him but if you can give him a bed I can get him released from the jailhouse and I had to promise Nicolo to take him back to his home."
" The older woman pointed at her. " Don't you think he also should have a choice and the right to know who his family are ? "
" Do you think he would want a mother for the person he thinks caused his Father's death ? "
" Did you, kill him ? "
" No I didnt but he thinks that I did."
Cyrene gave a sigh." Well I can set up a cot for him in the alcove, it will be a bit tight but he will be more comfortable there than in a cell I suppose, and even if you're not prepared to tell him the truth I would still like to say hello to my grandson before you take him away forever."
Xena pulled a face and Gabrielle watched the door close as Cyrene left and sighed." She looks very upset I guess she would be not getting the chance to know her grandson. Were you also just going to leave without telling me ? " Xena pulled up sharply as if under a lash." It won't be an easy journey Gabrielle. I'll understand if you don't want to and stay here."
" You don't want me to ? "
" That's not what I'm saying Gabrielle. Do you think you would be up to a gruelling journey why would you want to do that ? "
" Because, because I'm your soulmate you stubborn warrior." she wagged her finger at Xena." Because I love you I'm not staying behind Xena because I belong here with you and I know that now. Where you go I go Xena. Even if it's down to Tartarus."
Xena sighed realising with her words Gabrielle was not going to give way." Let's hope that it won't come to that."
Minutes later Gabrielle asked. " So Solan truly remembers nothing about our last meeting ? "
Xena shook her head." He has no memory of it and I doubt the business with Dagnine and the Ixion caves have happened either. It must have something to do with this time slip and five year gap. To Solan I'm just his father's killer and to Nicolo he Is just another would be assasin out to make a name for himself and he wouldn't release him unless I promised to take him away. He dosn't care if I were to kill him just so long as I don't do it here and mess up his cosy life." She sighed.
" So that's why you promised to take him home."
Xena nodded." More or less. As much as Nicolo cares he's just trouble to him and wants him out."
" I can see why you didn't want your mother to know. Will you tell him ? "
GABRIELLE ! " And the bard changed tack." Dagnine is He still alive ? "
" Maybe who knows, he's not my main concern right now." Xena growled.
" So, two days to gather supplies and then we go ? " Gabrielle clapped her hands together and Xena turned a quizzical eye on the bard." Are you sure you want to do this it will be no easy ride."
" Ride ! " Gabrielle squeaked.
" There are bandits in the area so we won't be walking. Three days at most. "
" Horses ! " her voice rose.
" And we must carry enough food with us because we will have no time to stop and hunt. Are you still sure that you want to do this ? " Gabrielle groaned realising all Cyrene's cooking she would be missing." Trail sticks. Cold cuts."
" Change of mind ? " Xena asked biting on a lip to stop herself from laughing.
Gabrielle smiled wanly. " No piece of cake."