Months Later
Crawford Mansion
The large doors of the library sitting room opened. From behind the minion of vampires and William, Angelus appeared holding a young man in his mid-twenties. The man's eyes were red, puffy, and filled with tears that stained down his face. The odour of terror and piss surrounded the man like a hazy mist.
Angelus' upper lip curled with disgust but the man was necessary to the means. He dropped the shaking man to Buffy's feet.
Slowly, Buffy turned her eyes from the dancing bright flames of the fire to the weak man muttering incoherent pleas. Buffy sat in a large chair with her legs tucked under herself and a comfy knitted sweater swallowed her thinning body. "What's this?"
"You need to eat," Angelus replied.
For the past months since regaining her dreaded soul, Buffy's already slim frame began to wither. He could see her ribs, her cheekbones were more defined, her collarbone was restrained under her skin. This was not his Buffy. This ghost of a woman was virtually unrecognisable.
"I'm not hungry." Her wide conflicting eyes narrowed over the shivering man. She tightened her small fist that held closed the sweater around her neck. The smell of his body intoxicated her senses. More than anything she wanted to feed. Her stomach growled for blood, but she couldn't take a life. An epic Roman battle fought inside of her, controlling herself from leaping off of the chair and sinking her teeth into the man's enticing neck.
Angelus stepped over the man and went to his mate crouching to her eye level, "My love, you've barely eaten anything in months. If you starve yourself anymore—I don't want to know what will happen." Angelus reached out and cupped a gentle hand around her cheek, "Whatever's stopping you, fight it. You're a vampire, do not forget that. You need his blood to survive." He could see her internal battle with herself as clear as day. She was hungry. But for the life of him, he had trouble understanding her inner struggle to give into her demon. "Please, love, for me."
Buffy's eyes reached his then back down at the man's. She slowly nodded her head and scooted to the edge of the chair as Angelus picked up the young man by the back of his shirt and held the man in place for Elizabeth.
Buffy stood from the chair. She was significantly smaller than the captured young man. Her soulful eyes met his bright blue ones. He silently begged for her mercy and pardon him. Buffy hesitantly reached out her hand to touch his face but quickly drew it away quickly dropping her hand to her side. "I can't." Her chin quivered with desperation.
"Eat." Angelus softly commanded not wanting to scare her off. In the midst this entire ordeal, he learned to be patient and understanding but it was beginning to wear thin. But this was his mate, he would have to force himself to gather more patience. It was unheard of for a vampire or any demon for that matter to regain a human soul. This was something no had seen coming.
Clenching her jaw forcing the aminal instinct of her body to come forth and push aside the soul for just a moment so she could throw herself to the young male to feed. She slowly unfolded her tight fists unable to take a human life.
The young man's eyes widen with terror.
Gathering all of her courage once more, Buffy's hand went around to back the man's head. She tugged on his dark hair, tilting his head to the side, exposing his neck. The scent of his blood swarmed into her nostrils, sending an exhilarated feeling but her tortured conscience's voice hollered in her ears demanding to know what she was thinking.
The man began to wriggle in Buffy's hands, struggling to push himself away from her.
Angelus watched her carefully but the man in her hands was moving too much. Out frustration, Angelus snatched the man from her hands and snapped his neck. He shoved the dead man into Buffy's arms. "Eat." He told her again backing away to the chair she had previously sat in.
Buffy closed her eyes finding the strength within her to bring forth her demon. Luckily, her hunger was beginning to cloud her newfound conscience. Her haggard features morphed into her true face. She opened fanged mouth and lowered it down to the man's neck and bit into it.
When the fresh blood hit the back of her throat she growled and bit down harder with need and desperation sucking his blood.
Angelus sat back folding his hands over one another and watched his lover greedily suck the man's blood. He felt relief that she was finally eating. He was tearing his dead insides apart watching her wither away to nothing. She was too thin in his mind. Under her beautiful green eyes were dark blue circles. He was becoming desperate to find a way to tear that soul out from her body. Nothing seemed to work. He had the Shaman, every Warlock, and black Witch, he could find across the world to come but still, his Buffy was cursed.
When the body was completely drained of blood, Buffy dropped him to the floor. Two minions raced over to the body and dragged it out of the way.
Angelus stood to his feet opening his arms out wide for her. Buffy turned into his body and sobbed into her hands feeling nothing but utter guilt for the evil act she had just committed. He wrapped his arms around her thin body and hugged her tightly feeling her tears soak through his silk shirt.
"I have the perfect location to launch you, Smurf-y." Angelus smirked looking at the Judge standing against the wall staring blankly at the evil Master Vampire.
William tipped back in his chair with his feet on the edge of the table uncaringly. "And where's that, mate?"
"My Buffy thought of it," Angelus said proudly and looked back at his mate sitting in a chair back against a wall staring mindlessly at the fire.
Drusilla sat down beside her Sire. Her brown eyes were wide with wonderment as she stared at the once majestic vampiress, "Mother Angel has a bright light." She began. "Mother Angel always had a bright light but this light is a curse." Drusilla hissed.
"Quiet!" Angelus growled coming to his lover's defence. For months, Drusilla and the other vampires pestered him with questions about his companion's condition. And for months he snarled angrily until they went away.
Angelus went to his Queen and went to his knee in front of her, taking her hand. He watched as she startled her from wandering and brooding thoughts. She shifted her eyes from the fire to his face. Buffy couldn't control her body shivered feeling Angelus' lips against her knuckles. He missed her strong hands wrapped around him in every delicious way possible. He missed her body pressed against his giving him impossible warmth.
Words weren't necessary in order for Angelus to understand her thoughts. He promised to her months prior and every day since that he would do everything in his power to rid of that poisonous soul.
It was so long ago during the mating ritual, Angelus promised that he would be by her side no matter what. They would never under any circumstances separate from each other. He was now sticking by that vow.
"Tonight is the night, my love. Just as we always planned, you and I are going to unleash our pet. You do remember that plan, right?" Angelus asked gently.
Buffy silently nodded and watched Angelus searched her green eyes for some sort of glint or glimmer of excitement that she would have shown in the past. But there was nothing but remorse and exhaustion. The fire that he had fallen in love with had dimmed into blackness.
For months he had men working around the clock in search of a cure for her disease. He was running out of patience and ideas.
"Be excited, my love." Angelus tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear.
"I am." She told him quietly.
Angelus saw through her knowing she was just saying it to appease him. He decided not to push it and nodded. He stood from the floor and pressed his lips against her forehead and gave her frail bony hand a gentle squeeze; afraid to crack her bones.
Buffy's followed him with her eyes as he turned around back to the meeting to continued presenting the grand plan.
She knew that something had to be done. Buffy thought long and hard about her options for her new situation. She can either, learn to suppress her guilt-stricken conscience and continue on like a demon or betray everything she's ever known, including her mate.
Sunnydale High Library
Faith sat on the top edge of a chair twirling a stake around her hand half listening to Giles and the Scoobie meeting.
"Is it strange that we haven't heard from either Buffy or Angelus in months?" Willow asked.
Giles removed his glasses polishing them with a handkerchief. "I suppose..."
"Buffy is probably going through something very traumatic." Jenny looked at Giles.
Giles nodded his head placing his glasses back onto the bridge of his nose. "There has never been a situation like this before. A demon having their human soul restored. The horror she is probably going through—"
"—I've had better days." The gang turned around to the front library doors to see Buffy standing there. Her appearance surprised them. Though she was still very beautiful, her legendary radiance and confidence had seemed to dim in its exuberance. She appeared emotionally drained. Her hair laid around her shoulders in messy blonde waves. A dark grey cardigan sweater hung off of her slim body. It was obvious that she had not been eating or sleeping well. She looked weak.
"Buffy!" Willow said with surprise and relief to see that she hadn't done anything too extreme like suicide from the guilt.
"Buffy, are you well?" Giles asked despite himself. He knew deep inside, he shouldn't care for this vampire but her soul was different than the evil demon that inhabited her body for centuries and tormented them for months on end.
"I have information." Buffy slowly moved across the library towards them but still kept a safe distance the group; especially from Faith.
Faith cocked a high suspicious brow. She was wary of where the Vampiress. For months, she hadn't seen her or her lover running around town causing havoc. "And what information would that be?"
"Angelus is planning on setting the Judge loose. Tonight at the mall."
Giles' eyes went wide, "He's breaking our agreement? You know this for certain?"
"I do." Buffy nodded.
"How?" Faith ran her eyes over the blonde vampire.
Buffy looked at the Slayer unfazed by the Slayer's venomous tone. "Because it was my plan. It was my plan all along. To form an alliance with you. I knew you," she looked at Giles, "would want the Judge to be destroyed. So I had Angel to agree with your terms."
The Scoobie's stared at the vampire with surprise.
A small half smile tugged at the corner of Buffy's lips, "I've been around a very long time. I've just seen just about everything there is to see. I've done everything there is to be done." She released an unneeded breath, "Angel is going to carry out the rest of my plan, in my honour. The Judge needs lots of people in order for him to gain his power and where's a lot of people...?"
"At the mall," Willow answered.
"At the mall," Buffy repeated with a nod. The Scoobies stared at her with conflicting expressions unsure whether to believe in the vampiress or accuse of her setting a trap like before. "You can either believe me or not. No matter what, the Judge will attack tonight and if you don't stop it, you're going to have a lot of innocent dead lives on your conscience and believe, you don't want that."
Faith stood up from her chair and moved around the table standing in front of the vampire. She crossed her arms showing her power. "How do we stop it?"
Buffy tilted her head to the side sizing up the Vampire Slayer. "No weapon forged can kill him." She said and caught Giles' head nod. "The last time it took an army. What you need is sitting in the artillery room at the army base just outside of town."
"Yeah, I know it." Xander stepped around Cordelia nodding his head.
"Good. I'll be at the mall at sundown." Buffy said began started to turn away when Faith called out to her.
"So what? Are you one of us now?" Faith asked.
Buffy turned back to the gang and shrugged, "I don't know." She left the library leaving the Scoobies to ponder what had just happened.
Sundown
Sunnydale Shopping Mall
Night came quickly, the mall was crowded with people moving in and out of the stores and standing in a long line outside the movie theatre.
Double doors on top of the upper level of the mall opened. William and Drusilla were the first to enter along with a band of vampire minions. The Judge was the next to enter and finally, Angelus and Buffy followed the demon arm and arm.
Angelus unhooked her hand that was around him and stepped forward standing beside the blue demon. He grinned with excitement when the Judge extended his hand towards a businessman burning him to ash.
"Lock the exits," Angelus ordered to the vampires standing around him. He turned his eyes to the Judge and smirked darkly, "It's all yours."
Buffy stood in the background watching as the Judge held up his hand freezing everyone in the mall with a slow fire burn energy. She heard Drusilla's excited clapping hands and William's low chuckle.
In the back of the mall behind a concession stand, she saw a dark-haired woman sneakily moving around the frozen people careful not to be affected by them.
Suddenly, an arrow zipped through the air straight into the Judge's chest. The Judged stumbled backwards cutting off his burning power. "Who dares?" The Judge angrily roared.
All eyes went up to the top of the popcorn machine of the concession stand was Faith holding a crossbow in her hands. "I think I got his attention..."
Angelus growled with anger. How the fuck did they know?
"You are a fool," The Judge said, "No weapons forged can stop me."
Buffy stepped away unnoticed by Angelus or anyone else in the Evil group. She stepped into the shadows knowing what was to come.
"That was then," Faith hoisted a rocket launcher on her shoulder. "This is now."
"What does that do?"
Faith smirked and launched the rocket.
William grabbed Drusilla by her wrist throwing themselves out of the way. Angelus jumped over the rail of the balcony just rocket hit the Judge exploding him into pieces.
Angelus looked up shaking off the rubble and smoke from his hair and roared with anger. "Get out of here!" He ordered William and Drusilla.
The furious vampire jumped to his feet and growled watching Faith disappear into the movie theatre lobby under the water sprinklers. "Run as fast you can, Slayer! You'll be ripped to pieces when I get my hands on you!" He stomped through the cascading water straight into the theatre lobby.
The lobby of the theatre was quiet. The only sounds were the water hitting the glass cases and the familiar voices of the gang outside picking up pieces of the Judge.
Angelus cautiously entered the theatre lobby moving his eyes carefully around the soaked room.
A pole of a rope stand smacked across the vampires head. Angelus twisted around and growled flashing his fangs wearing his true face. Faith batted the pole again into Angelus' body but this time, Angelus caught the weapon and tossed aside. He backhanded her across the face then slammed her body into a wall.
Faith recovered quickly and snapped kicked Angelus into the chest. She followed her kick with a series of angry punches into his body than face.
Angelus tired of this fight already, he grabbed the Slayer by her brown soaked hair and smashed her head through a pastry glass case and pulled her up through the top of the glass before tossing her aside.
"Tsk, tsk, poor Faith-y. Just admit it," he gripped the back of her black jean jacket with both hands and brought her up forcing her to stare at his demonic face, "you'll never beat me." He slowly began to lower his sharp fangs over her neck when he was suddenly pulled back dropping Faith to the ground.
Faith landed with a thud and looked up to see Buffy standing in front of her facing Angelus.
Angelus' golden eyes moved up to her face with an expression of disbelief. "Buffy?"
Buffy did not say a word as she lifted Angelus to his feet by the front of his shirt. "Leave." She softly told him as he fell back down to the floor.
Angelus couldn't move. He stared at his mate shocked to speechlessness. She was protecting Faith. She must be the one who told them the plan and how to stop the Judge, it's the only way they'd ever know. My Buffy betrayed me.
He stood straight morphing back to his handsome features but the expression of confusion mixed with his hurt of betrayal painted across his face. "What happened to you?" Angelus slowly backed away from his lover and the Slayer and turned away back into the main area of the mall making the final escape.
Buffy sucked back her tears, forcing herself to deal with her unassorted feelings later and turned to Faith. She looked down at the Slayer who had a look of awe etched into her features. Buffy held out her hand for Faith to take. "Are you okay?"
Faith nodded as she got to her feet. She was as surprised as Angelus. She opened her mouth to say something but Buffy was already backing away towards the theatre's exit.
Following Night
Crawford Mansion
Angelus sat on the step in front of the large fireplace. He paid no mind to the burning heat against his back. Lost in his own mind he stared down at his shoes.
What had happened the night before, Angelus had not seen coming at all; Elizabeth, his lover, his mate had turned against him. She pushed him away to protect the Slayer. She had deliberately foiled their plan. Other than him, Buffy knew how to defeat the Judge if they ever lost control over the demon.
His Buffy had betrayed him.
He wished that he could thrash about as he normally would have done if he was double-crossed. Normally, Angelus would find his Judas and torture them until they slowly died an agonising death but this wasn't just any traitor, this was his love. He wanted to fall to his knees and sob.
His thoughts were interrupted when he heard soft footsteps coming from the garden entryway.
Angelus looked up to see his Buffy standing before him. She looked better if not still torn with guilt and confusion. She wore a light purple three-quarter sleeve blouse, a silver skirt and matching sandals. She looked more like herself again.
"You betrayed me." Angelus' voice of pain sliced through the thick silence.
"I know." She whispered unable to meet his eyes.
Angelus got to his feet and stuffed his hands into his trouser pockets, "Why?"
Buffy was silent for what felt like a century. Inwardly, she was forcing herself to just as honest as she possibly can with him. That is what they needed at the moment, total honesty. "It was something that I had to do."
"So, what? Are you going become one of them? A white hat? You're going to start killing your own kind for what? Redemption? To make amends for your sins?" He didn't mean for his words to sound so biting but it could not be helped.
Buffy looked down at her hands unsure how to answer him. "I don't know." Her eyes went up to his hopeful looking face. "But I need to figure it out. I don't know who I am anymore. I'm not who I was nor am I that fragile little girl from my first life. I'm caught between two beings—two phases of me. I don't know where I belong. I feel... lost."
"You're not lost. You belong with me. You're a demon, Buffy, never forget that."
She took a small step forward never shifting her eyes from his. "What kind of demon am I? I can't go back to the way things were, Angel. Not like this. I just can't."
Angelus knew without asking what she was referring too but he still refused to accept that. "Buffy, you can—"
"—Look at me." She dropped her hands to her sides, opening herself up to him. "I could barely feed on that man's blood, let alone take his life. You did that. I don't have it in me to be the way I was. Please, understand me."
Angelus angrily clenched his jaw, "So what happens now? I go to feed and you come after me with a stake?"
"No," Buffy shook her head. "The soul isn't going away anytime soon. I need to understand this thing that's in me now. And I can't be with you as I do."
His ears perked to her last words. She had just said the unthinkable aloud and she meant it.
"What? Buffy," Angelus stepped forward towards her still keeping a space between them, "when we mated, we vowed—I vowed to you, no matter ever happened in our lives, I'd be there for you. That I'd love you—"
"—Can you honestly look at me in the eyes and tell me that you still love me?" For the first time in months, Buffy's voice was clear and precise, "Tell me that you understand me now—even just a little bit? Because if you do, I would sure as hell welcome your insight."
Angelus hated her but deep down, he knew that she was right. She was always so wise and intelligent, it was one of the many traits he loved and hated about her.
When her hand touched his cheek, Angelus opened his eyes to her face and leaned into her tender touch. "For the first time ever, I can feel it, Angel. I can feel my love for you. This soul... whatever it is... It was the missing piece that I never knew I needed. But it's there and its real. I love you so much but I need this. I need a break... from us."
"Buffy, I'm trying here. I'm trying to understand. I can try harder." He ran his fingers through her hair memorised by its softness. "I swear to you, I can try harder."
Buffy held a finger over his lips, "It's only for a little while. Please, give me this time to find myself again."
"What if you find yourself and I no longer fit in, what then?" Angelus feared that Buffy would do the same as she had done to the last man who loved her, she told him that she needed to find herself again and she never went back to him.
Buffy did not respond to his question. Instead, she closed the small space between them and pressed her mouth against his in a gentle kiss. Angelus sighed heavily, feeling like this was a goodbye. It's been too many months since he last felt her soft lips against his. He needed her. He needed his Buffy.
"Please," Angelus begged her softly resting his forehead against hers, "don't leave me."
Buffy slowly backed out from his strong and comforting embrace. She needed him to understand and accept this from her. She felt her dead heart tear into pieces inside her chest. This was about the worst form of torture she had never committed.
Taking the first step of bravery, Buffy turned her back to her mate heading to the doors she had entered from when Angelus' deep voice stopped her.
"You still my girl?"
Buffy glanced over her shoulder back at him, "Always."
Angelus watched her leave the mansion. His eyes followed her until she disappeared completely in the darkness of the night. No longer able to stand on his two feet anymore, Angelus sat back down on the fireplace step. He clenched his fists tightly until they shook. The pain swirling in his chest ate him from the inside out. He felt his skin crawl. There was only one other solution he could think of in order to get his mate back. More than anything, he needed her.