Yay! 100 reviews! XD From here on out darker themes and content are going to be more frequent, and sometimes even more descriptive. I just wanted to make you all aware of the fact that the backstories of these three are anything but pleasant. Anyways… Transformers is owned by Hasbro! I only own Athena and the plot, and any other OC's that I create.

(Athena's POV)

I lay on my back staring at the ceiling over the berth, after coming to a few groons ago due to a nightmare. Now I was just… pondering everything… and I didn't know what to do after realizing some things… Such as the fact that I felt dirty again for the first time in a very long time…

I'd tried so hard to lock the memories of the past away…

I'd tried not to see myself that way anymore…

Not that it had ever truly freed me from everything that had ever hurt me in life. But I'd been able to try existing in a somewhat normal manner thanks to my adoptive family unit teaching me that not everybot was out there to hurt me. That there were good bots out there that wouldn't betray me. Those lessons had made it possible to lock the pain away and focus on some of the good things in life.

Like the warmth of Opi's hugs, or the way my armor shined when Cee polished me… and I could actually feel her touching me without being afraid of it. How Danni would always be there watching out for me, both her and Opi encouraging me all the time.

Not putting me down, or telling me that I wasn't good enough…

They never blamed me for my own existence like it was a curse or plague.

They acted like it was ok… like it was a good thing.

I was actually able to make something of myself by training with them, or Uncle Ratchet. I was able to be proud of something I did for the first time in my life… and I'd learned so much about myself. Such as the fact that I loved all kinds of art, painting, drawing, sculpting, welding… I could get my servos dirty and in doing so really say what I was feeling, and it made me feel so much lighter inside.

And even though I was meek in close quarters combat, I was a natural marksman. It was one of the few things that I actually had pride in, and under Cee, Mia, Moonracer, and Mia's tutelage I had become a Master Marksman. My skills in weaponry were so advanced that I had a one hundred percent accuracy rating with any ranged weapon now. I was confident in this skill. It was one of the few ways that I was actually useful during the war.

My medical skills were another area that I was of use in. Back when I'd started I didn't know a mesh bandage from welding metal I swear! But after training with Uncle for all this time I was an Expert Medic as well. Second only to him in that area.

The point I was trying to make is that I was really able to fit in with somebot…

I wasn't locked in that basement anymore…

But now… I couldn't stop thinking of those days…

I didn't feel good enough anymore.

My optics slid from side to side, taking in the two mechs on either side of me… Both pressed up tight against me under the thermal blanket I distinctly remember having pushed off of me last night…

I wasn't good enough for them.

I needed to go.

I'd decided that they could find a femme better than me. One who was prettier, smarter, funnier, and was everything I would never be.

With coolant pooling in my optics, I eased my way out of their embrace and scaled down the berth and onto the floor, and from there I quietly crept through the house. I didn't know where to go or what to take… I couldn't take Sparky, nor did I have time to take anything else…

Well I wasn't going to leave New Iacon… I was just going to go talk to Cee and see if I could stay with her and Flareup… then I'd come back and break up with the twins. Afterwards I'd arrange to have my things picked up…

At least that was the plan…

But I froze just short of the door for some reason…

Why? Why was I wasting time standing here like this? If I didn't hurry they'd wake up and then there would be an argument over me trying to leave…

So why wasn't I leaving while I had the chance?

The answer came to me quicker than I was expecting… and I slumped against the door frame dejectedly when I realized why… Because even knowing how disgusting and filthy I was… I didn't want to leave the mechs I actually allowed myself to love. Even if I knew that I wasn't good enough, and that I didn't deserve them.

I warred with myself over everything. Standing here doing nothing… Wasting time…

How long went by? I wasn't sure… But I still didn't move… I should have. I should have just walked out and never come back.

"Princess? What are you doing?"

I tensed, slowly turning to peer at Sides who was standing at the corner of the stairs watching me. The expression on his face was one of concern, and he looked like he was torn between not wanting to move, or wanting to come closer.

I turned around so that I was pressed against the door with my wings splayed out over the surface.

He seemed to realize something, optics widening as he lost the battle of wills that kept him in place and finally took a step forward. "You were trying to leave. Why?"

"I just… I have to…"

"Is this because you're afraid of Sunny now? Because if it is I can tell you that he'd never go berserk and hurt you. He did it to protect you."

My helm shot up as instant guilt and shock pulsated in my spark. "No! No that's not it! I'm not scared of him!"

"Then why? Why are you trying to leave us if you're not scared of him?"

"I… I... I just want you to be happy... And... I know that... you're better off without me... I'm not worth the trouble... Sunny could get arrested for what he did yesterday!"

Sides' optics softened as he took several steps towards me. "Don't be afraid that he's going to get in trouble for that Ati. Nobot will even know that he was involved I promise."

"You don't know that! Somebot could have seen us!"

"I do know Princess. And besides, I care more about the fact that you think we're not happy with you. I don't know why you think that, but it's farther from the truth than anything I've ever heard in my life. You've made us the happiest mechs in the world Princess. And wow… I sound like the cheesiest, sappiest mech on Cybertron right now…" He trailed off, before shrugging and grinning. "Oh well. Everything I said was true so who cares?"

My spark pulsed with bittersweet feelings of joy, love, guilt, and self-loathing. Just hearing those words made me want to run and jump into his arms, yet at the same time it strengthened my resolve to leave just as much. These two were so handsome, sweet, loving… and they could have better. They would if I just turned and left…

"I have to go…" I whimpered, but I couldn't make myself move… I was just frozen in place…

Both of our helms whipped around as Sunny came around the corner from the stairs. "Go where?" He asked seriously. "Where are you going to go? Why? Does this have something to do with what happened last night?"

"No! No that's not-!"

He strode up to stop right in front of me. "Don't ever be afraid that I'll turn on you when I'm like that. I promise that I'll never hurt you Athena."

"I know."

His arms came up to cage me in against the door. "Then why do you want to leave us? And don't give me this scrap about not being good enough for us! I want an honest fragging answer about why we should let you turn around and walk out! We're not going to let this happen!"

"Sunny I…" I started, only to be cut off when my HUD pinged with an incoming comm link from Prowl. "Hold on an astrosecond, I have a comm message from Prowl."

:Prowl? Why are you comming me so early in the morning?:

:I have an urgent mission for you. I need you to come to the base as soon as possible.:

:Very well. I'll be there in a few breems.:

:Ah, and bring the twins as well. They'll be going with you, and it saves me the helmache that comming Sideswipe would have caused.:

:Of course. We'll be there soon.:

With that I cut the link and turned back to the two, Sunny who was still waiting expectantly, and Sides who looking at him worriedly. "Prowl needs to see all three of us right away."

Sunny scowled. "Why?"

"We have a mission I guess."

Sides patted Sunny on the shoulder, tugging him forward and taking me by the arm. "Well at least it's not anything to do with your little berserk escapade last night bro. Let's just go and get this over with so we can come back and talk this whole thing over with Princess."

"Fine. But just so that she knows, we're not letting her break up with us."

"I agree."

I just kind of stared at the two while both took me by each arm and led me from the housing unit. Well they were surprisingly persistent… Not that it made me feel one hundred percent certain that it was ok for me to stay with them. I did want to but…

"So what kind of mission do you think we're getting?"

Sunny snorted. "Probably guard detail for a caravan or something boring like that."

"Well then why is he having Princess go with us? She's a medic. It would make more sense to have somebot like Bee or Blaster go instead."

I felt my lips tilting down into a scowl. "I'm also a marksman too."

"Ah right. I kind of forgot about that." He admitted sheepishly.

"I guess I can't really blame you for not knowing. I don't exactly flaunt it."

"Exactly. Anyways I hope we don't get another super boring assignment. The last two escort missions nearly made me die of boredom."

"Well I hope that it's nothing too dangerous." Sunny inserted, optics drifting down towards me not at all discreetly.

"Oh right. Wouldn't want Princess to get hurt somehow."

Oh great… now they were seeing me as the only weak link in the team we were about to become for the mission. "I'll have you two know that I'll kick your afts with any kind of ranged weapon any day. Even Moonracer, and Bluestreak didn't boast as many kills during the war as me. So if you're worried about having to sparklingsit me don't be."

They both blinked at me, then Sides grinned. "Well actions speak louder than words Princess. You'll have to show us that you can walk the walk."

I rolled my optics. "Whatever."

The rest of the walk to the base was done in silence. Maybe they were busy talking over what had happened a while ago, with me trying to leave and all. I wasn't sure, but I was too deep in my own thoughts to really care at the moment.

I really needed to figure out what I was doing… Later.

But we arrived at base, and I forced the thoughts away as we made our way to Prowl's office where he was sitting at his desk going over some data pads. He looked up when we arrived, sitting the stack he was working on aside. "Thank you for coming so promptly."

"Of course Prowl. What did you need to see us for?"

"Straight to the point as always Athena. I have an urgent mission request from New Kaon. Apparently a group of raiders has been attacking the energon mines located beyond the city walls, killing the workers and stealing the unprocessed energon. They've also been implicated in several murders, kidnappings, and rapes reported from inside the city."

By the time he'd finished speaking my processor was racing through relevant things I'd need or want to know. The more I knew about this group, the easier it would be to formulate a plan of action. "Is there any other relevant information on the group itself? Numbers? Any details on appearance? General time spans for when these incidents have occurred?"

"We're unsure how many there are, but I assume that the group isn't too large. They haven't been stealing excess stores from the mines, and if their numbers were large it would be much harder to commit these crimes without more witnesses."

"Unless the ones responsible actually broke off from a much larger group. At what rate are these attacks on the energon mines occurring?"

"Once every quartex or so."

Well that didn't really help me… "Even if it was a smaller group, that time span would give them plenty of time to recover, distribute the stolen reserves, and organize another attack." I trailed off with a sigh. "What general time of the day are the attacks occurring?"

"During 3rd shift."

"How many workers are reported to be mining in the mines at that time?"

"The targeted mines are some of the smaller ones located near Kaon, so a dozen or so workers are generally working it at any time."

"So there would probably have to be at least six or so armed raiders at least to restrain the workers, and then move the reserves before the next shift change. Have any of them been questioned?"

"Yes. However, details on both the raiders numbers, and weaponry have varied with each incident."

"So based off of that we should assume that others may be hanging back if things don't go according to plan." I concluded.

He nodded. "Yes. The details we have are sketchy at best, so I urge you to use extreme caution on this mission. I know that the war is over, and these are not Decepticons, but they are still dangerous."

"Of course. We'll be careful… well I will. I can't say anything about these two."

"Hey!" Sides gasped in mock hurt. "We're always careful."

I ignored him in favor of focusing on Prowl. "Is that all?"

"Yes it is. You three are to prepare for this mission and be ready to leave within a joor. I have tram passes for you to use that will take you all the way to Kaon, as well as some credits to use for anything you may need. We have no idea which area they will strike in next so your best bet would be to scope out New Kaon and see if you can find any leads there."

I stepped forward to take the small chips containing the passes for our tram ride, and our credit allotments. With them in hand I turned and made my way towards the door with the twins on either side of me, but before I left the room I remembered another important detail I'd forgotten about… I turned to look at the SIC over my shoulder. "Prowl?"

"Yes?"

"Are we allowed use of deadly force on this? Or strictly debilitation?"

The twins looked down at me in surprise.

"Use of deadly force is authorized. We don't need you to bring them back alive, unless you have a good reason to."

I nodded, before I finally left his office and started on my way to the armory where Ironhide and Mia kept and maintained my weapons for me.

The twins followed along after me, silently, well until Sides looked down at me with an expression that made me think he didn't know what to think... "Did you really just ask that Princess?"

"Yes I did."

"Well… you just don't seem the type to-!"

I cut him off. "Sides I already told you that I'm a marksman. I've killed before even if I don't really like it, but sometimes it's necessary and I have to accept that. And in this situation it is necessary. I don't know about you, but I'm not risking a limb to try bringing one of these aftholes back here."

Both just stared at me without commenting.

We walked into the armory at that moment, where Hide was milling about at one of his work desks. "Hey Hide!"

He turned to look at us. "Yeah?"

"You finish working on my Blue Rain yet?"

"Blue… Rain…?" Sides mumbled.

Hide nodded. "Yeah. It's finished and ready to blow somebot's helm clean off. I put it in your vault."

"Ok thanks. Have all my other weapons been given a tune up yet?"

"Yeah. Everything is rarin' to go half pint."

I made my way passed him, and into the storage vault area where all the weapons on base were stored… "Excellent…"

"Should we be afraid of you Princess?"

We made it to my individual vault, which was considerably larger than the rest of them. I typed in the entry-code to open the reinforced cybertanium doors. "No."

I really did mean that, but when the doors slid open and I led them into a large room that was lined with guns, guns, guns, grenades, explosives, and more guns… they both shuffled a little closer together, eyeing everything on display warily.

Maybe that was because I had weapons in here for every situation… Various high impact sniper rifles, some with armor piercing rounds, others explosive tipped caseless, some ion rifles, semi-automatic marksman rifles, C4, ion grenades, submachine guns, high impact servo-held blasters, and everything in between.

"Um, Princess…? You um, have a lot of guns…"

I walked over to the wall farthest from the door, where my pride and joy rifle sat on prominent display… My Blue Rain… She was perfection… so beautiful that I couldn't even describe her…

I reached up and plucked her up to cradle her against my chassis like one would a newborn sparkling, even going so far as to kiss the barrel. "Oh I've missed you Rain…" I rubbed the scope affectionately. "Ready to test out the new modification ole Hide upgraded you with?"

"Um… you're talking to your gun… and better yet, how do you use that gun when it's at least ¾ of your actual size?" Sides asked with wide optics.

I sighed dreamily. "You'll be surprised by just how good I am at using this fine piece of machinery…"

"I don't think I want to see it." He pointed out. "And just looking at that makes me afraid for my life."

"I won't use her on you. It wouldn't be nice to shred your joints before making them explode."

He slowly backed away to hide behind Sunny. The latter was looking at me like I'd suddenly grown an extra helm. "What kind of… modifications does that thing have?"

I perked up a bit. "Oh she's a high impact sniper rifle that uses explosive rounds, that just so happen to have a screw like tip that allows the spinning motion of the bullet to have a much more pronounced armor piercing effect… And she's also suppressed, so nobot even knows a thing before they're dead!"

Now Sunny was backing away too. "Ok… just promise me that you won't point that thing in our general direction…"

I just nodded, nuzzling the expanse of Blue Rain's black plating which was lined with gold trimming…

"Hey… there's no red trimming on that gun!" Sides pouted.

"I've had her since right after the war started Sides, so way before I met you two. Maybe I'll add some red trimming to her too?"

He perked up. "Yay! Now we really need to get around so that we can leave… So uh… get everything you need."

Nodding, I spun Rain around behind me and allowed her to break down to form an additional bit of plating along my back strut. I perused the rest of my assorted weaponry, before selecting a more versatile mid to long-range marksman rifle with explosive tipped rounds, an ion blaster, and another servo iron blaster…

I looked my selection over quickly… "I need some explosives too… just in case…" I looked back up at the wall… "Should I go with C4… or Ionsemtex? I can stick the latter and detonate it… maybe an acid grenade? Could eat the joints away with that… Oooh! Maybe some heated shrapnel bombs!"

"Princess…"

"Which one…?"

"Athena we need-!"

"What's most versatile in this situation? I should probably choose two…"

"Athena seriously-!"

"And take a few of each…"

"Athena!"

I squinted my optics, carefully looking between the acid grenades, ionsemtex, and the heated shrapnel bombs… Maybe I should use smoke grenades? Or maybe… stun grenades? I'd take the ionsemtex, heated shrapnel, and some smoke grenades just in case.

I snatched a few of each off the wall and shoved them into by subspace.

"Um, Princess? Can you carry all those guns?"

"Absolutely. I can shove a few in subspace, and the blasters can attach to my forearms."

They waited patiently for me to do that.

"Are you ready to go now?" Sunny asked after I finished collapsing my weapons against my frame.

"Yes."

"Then let's go so Sides and I can get around, we need to get our weapons around too. Afterwards we need to get to the tram station so we don't miss our ride."

"Alright let's go."

Together we left the vault after I locked it up.

Hopefully the earlier events of today wouldn't distract me too much from the mission.

R&R! If you guys want a general idea of what Blue Rain looks like this is it! . /halo/images/5/5b/H4_binary_ /revision/latest?cb=20131121035252