Disclaimer: The great Stephanie Meyer owns all things Twilight. I'm just using her amazing characters to tell you a story.

Many thanks to my amazing team. I couldn't do this without you: ellachanted, Kate22689 and AgoodWITCH Love ya tons, ladies.

A/N: Just a quick note…again, this chapter is going to overlap a bit with the last. You'll get to see a little of what Edward was thinking as he tried to calm her down while they were lying together. So, let's get to it, shall we.

Chapter 25 Recap: Bella learned that Edward was alive and that her dad was dying. She ran home to check on him and, after overhearing a heart wrenching conversation between her mom and Mrs. Jones, blamed herself for her family's grief. When she heard the two women rush to tend to Charlie, Bella nearly ripped the door from its hinges to get into the house. Edward stopped her from doing something she'd regret and took her to his house to calm down and think rationally. Once inside, he tried to talk to her and get her to believe in his love again. The chapter ends with Bella surrendering to the emotional side of herself and holding on to Edward and praying for him to stay.

Caught up? Good…now, on with the story.

Chapter 26

EPOV

Bella hated me.

No. I couldn't be true. The words were impossible to comprehend. She was my best friend. She should have been my wife. We were supposed to have forever but I got sick and then I let Carlisle take me away. I knew it was wrong. I knew if I had come back she would still love me and we could have been together.

Why didn't I come back for her? How could I let her suffer like that?

She was right. I let her down. I broke my promises. I left her to die.

Never again.

No matter what she said to me or how many times she tried to push me away, I would never leave her side again. I was going to do whatever it took to make her believe that.

I held her a little closer to me. "I love you, Bella."

I couldn't stop myself and dipped my head to touch my lips to her forehead. She was still trying to push me away, not wanting me to touch her and I hated forcing myself upon her that way but that spark, that feeling that was always between us was still there.

I couldn't… I wouldn't let it go and I wouldn't allow her to either.

"And I know you love me, too."

"No." She tried to push me away again but I refused to let go.

"It's still there, Bella. I can feel it." I kissed her again. "Please tell me you can still feel it."

She struggled against me, refusing to answer. I locked my arms around her, unwilling to let her run from me again.

"We belong together, Angel. We always have."

I wanted her to agree. I wanted her to say something, but she gave me nothing. My heart broke with every second we spent in silence. I didn't know what to do, what to say. She had to remember. She had to…

Every thought was silenced when she finally stopped fighting against me. My body froze when I felt her hand slide over my hip and my breath caught when she pulled me against her.

"Edward."

Her soft voice saying my name was the sweetest sound in the world and my heart swelled with hope as her fist closed around my shirt, bringing me even closer to her.

Her forehead touched my chest as she surrendered fully. "Please stay with me."

Those four words were my salvation and I wanted nothing more than to hold her and kiss her for the rest of our existence, but I couldn't…not yet. She wasn't ready. I would be a fool to believe she'd suddenly forgiven me and let go of her anger. My Bella had always been stubborn.

Unable to fulfill my dreams of the past fourteen years, I settled for the closeness we shared on our last day together. I gripped her tighter and let my fingers slide through the silky strands of her hair.

"Shh. I'm here, my love, and I swear to you, I will never leave you again." I hoped to assure her with another stolen kiss to top of her head. "You're finally home with me, Angel…forever."

Releasing a shaky breath, Bella began to sob again. Her pain broke my heart as it always did, but this was so much worse, because this time I was the cause. Everything she was feeling was because of me, because I left her alone. But it would never happen again.

Lying there, I swore to God in heaven, pledging my life and my love to Bella until the end of time and I prayed for the day to come when she could finally forgive me and love me again.

~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~

The sliver of light coming through the slit in the curtains had been gone for so long I was counting the minutes before the sun rose to start a new day. If we were able to sleep, I would swear Bella had been under for hours. She didn't speak and she didn't move a single muscle as we lay there in the darkness. Her crying had stopped long ago and the silence in the room was both comforting and a little unnerving.

I'd spent years working to tune the voices out of my head and I'd gotten so good at it that I could focus on a single person if I wanted to. But I couldn't hear her.

I had tried. I had been trying since things settled next door and Mrs. Jones and Renee had gone to sleep. When I opened my mind, I could see the images of their dreams and the dreams of those in the neighborhood, but still nothing from Bella. Even when I closed myself off to everything but her, I couldn't hear a thing.

I began to believe something was wrong with me. How could she be so silent to me? Was it possible that she had cleared her mind of all her thoughts?

I doubted it. I knew Bella. She was a part of me and I knew her like I knew myself. I knew her mind had to be working frantically right now even if the stillness of her body showed no indication. I just wished I could hear what she was thinking.

As I suspected, it wasn't long before the sun was shining again and there was movement in the house next door. Mrs. Jones was humming as she began to cook breakfast and I heard a bed creak.

"Charlie?"

For the first time since yesterday morning, Bella's entire body stiffened.

"Honey, come back to bed."

"Too much to do, Renee." His voice was hoarse, still tired, then he groaned and I heard his feet hit the floor.

"Your appointment isn't for another four hours, Sweetheart. Please come back to bed," she begged him in both her words and her thoughts, knowing he needed to rest.

"Renee, I've been in bed for days."

Bella's fist tightened, ripping my shirt. I rubbed her back, comforting her the only way I could.

"I think I'll go help Maggie with breakfast." Charlie kissed his wife. "Sleep, Darling. I'll return soon."

"Maggie?" Bella's quiet voice startled me.

"Mrs. Jones," I answered her. She lifted her confused eyes to meet mine. "You and I spent our entire childhood with that woman and had no idea she and your father were best friends."

I smiled when Bella's brow creased.

"How do you know this?"

My smile faded, knowing this would be where it started. I had promised her the absolute truth and that was what I would give her. It wasn't a difficult question but I knew my Bella would be upset by my answer. And I'd learned enough about the girl in my arms now to know that she wouldn't take the news lightly and I braced myself for a fight.

Hoping to keep her violent side at bay, I spoke in the calmest voice possible. "The first year I came home, I overheard a horrible argument between the three of them. Your father was so angry, more so than I'd ever heard in my life. He was yelling at your mother and when Mrs. Jones stepped in to defend her, he turned his anger on her."

"You're lying!" Her fist hit me hard and in a flash, she was across the room. "My father has never yelled at my mother and neither of my parents have ever said a cross word to Mrs. Jones. What could possibly cause them to argue?"

I didn't want to say it. I didn't want to hurt her again and it was inevitable that my words would do just that. I steeled myself for her wrath.

"They were arguing about you." I didn't expect the anger to drain from her face or for the deep pain to take its place. I continued quickly. "It was 1928 and your father had been looking for you every day since you disappeared nine years earlier. He was hurt and scared and upset, believing he had somehow let you down. That he had failed as a father because he couldn't protect you and keep you safe. He blamed himself for you leaving.

"Your mother found him crying after he had read a letter you left behind when you ran away and she begged him not to read it again." Bella slumped to the ground with her head in her hands. "He told her that he just wanted you back and Renee, always being the level headed one, told him that you had to be out there somewhere living a better life.

"He didn't take that comment well and his anger boiled over, accusing her of not caring about you. She tried to convince him that they wouldn't survive if he continued to use what little money they had left to find, and these are her words, 'someone who didn't want to be found.'"

Bella was sobbing again and I wanted so much to comfort her but I was afraid she wouldn't let me. At least not until I told her everything.

"Charlie flew into such a rage that the force of it overwhelmed me and I crumbled under the weight of it. When I had regained some control, I looked through the window and saw her cowering beneath him. He had her backed into a corner and I was afraid for a moment that he would have hurt her if Mrs. Jones hadn't come in to stop their argument."

"And you let this happen!" Bella's roar echoed in the empty room and faster than I believed possible, she had me pinned to the wall. "You stood by and watched while he threatened them."

"Bella, you know we can't…"

"He was going to attack my mother and you were going to allow it to happen!" she growled.

"No one can know about us, Bella. I couldn't step in, you know that." I rushed to explain.

Fury sparked in her eyes and a look of disgust distorted her features. "You're so afraid of the Italians that you would stand by and watch while a woman… no… while my mother was about to be hurt."

"I would never, Angel," I croaked against the arm she pressed into my throat. "The Italians don't frighten me, but I didn't need to help."

"She was afraid of him." She pressed harder and her eyes narrowed. "His rage backed her into a corner, and you didn't need to help?"

"He's your father, Angel. He loves her with his whole heart. I knew he would never hurt her."

I lifted my hand slowly to stroke her cheek. The pressure on my throat lessened slightly and I could see the conflict in her eyes.

"You know it's true, Bella." My eyes held hers and I stilled my hand to rest on her cheek. Her arm dropped to lie on my chest. "Your father was the most honorable man I had ever known. He would never do such a thing. He was in so much pain and her words triggered his anger, but he fought within himself to control his temper.

"Mrs. Jones' interference allowed him the time to remember himself. To bring himself back from that level of despair. Her words reminded him that they were both hurting and they needed each other."

The pain in her eyes broke my heart and my empty hand covered hers where it gripped my shirt. I knew she was blaming herself for what happened but I wouldn't allow her to shoulder this burden.

"I know you never wanted to hurt them, my love. You cannot blame yourself for their pain."

Tears pooled in her eyes. "How can you say that?"

"I know what you wrote in your letter. You were in such pain, Angel. You were only trying to save yourself. Your father knew that and he understood the pain you were in, but it didn't stop him from wanting you home.

"In his mind, Bella, it was his job to chase your demons away, to do everything in his power to make his little girl happy. When his every attempt failed and you ran away, he couldn't forgive himself. It wasn't until that night that Mrs. Jones helped him remember that your grief far outweighed his and the only way to help you was to find his own strength."

She released her grip on my shirt and pulled both her hands between us.

"He found that strength, Bella. The love your parents share is so much stronger now than it had ever been before." Slowly, I guided her back to sit on the bed and I dropped to my knees in front of her. "Their undying love for you, Angel, is what brought them back together again. It may have been born from pain, but they're still in love today because of you."

"Do you really believe that?" It was barely a whisper.

Her eyes still held sadness, only now there was a faint glimmer of hope there as well and I wouldn't let her lose it. With a hand on her cheek, I placed a small kiss on her forehead again.

"I know it, Bella."

As I pulled back, I caught a glimpse of a smile on her beautiful face before she forced it away. She pushed me away from her and moved across the room again.

"None of that explains how you know about her and my father."

My smile was automatic. She may have pushed me away but it wasn't in anger this time, and that was enough for me. It gave me hope and my voice was lighter now as I explained.

"Mrs. Jones showed so much courage stepping between them the way she did, giving no thought to her own safety. But, of course, she knew your father better than anyone and knew, without a doubt, that she was in absolutely no danger from him." I moved from the floor to the bed. "Your father yelled at her and, with all the most defiant attitude I'd ever heard her use before, she yelled right back at him." I chuckled as I relayed the memory to Bella. "I think she may have scared him a little."

A little grin fought its way to the surface but she fought again to hide it as if she wouldn't allow herself to be happy.

"She said something about her mother raising him and the two of them growing up like brother and sister." Bella's eyes widened in shock. "I think I had that same look on my face when I heard it, too. I would have never believed it if I didn't hear her speak the words."

The small laugh that slipped out was music to my ears. I had missed that sound so much over the years and I was bursting with joy that I had brought some small piece of happiness back to her.

"I've always known her family had served mine. They have for generations, but I would have never guessed they were friends. I'd only seen him treat her as an employee." Bella leaned against the wall with her arms crossed as she stared at the floor. "When I was fourteen, I had overheard a conversation between my parents. My father was concerned because Mrs. Jones had never married, she would never have children and when she was gone, there would be no one left to take care of me or my children."

She paused, shaking her head and I couldn't help but wonder what was going through her mind. I tried again to hear her, but was met with silence once more.

"If he only knew…" She trailed off.

Bella didn't speak again and my mind was running rampant trying to figure out what her last words meant.

When I couldn't take the silence, I asked, "If he only knew what?"

Bella slid to the floor, hugging her legs to her chest and resting her chin on her knee. When we were kids, she would only do that when she was sad. It didn't happen often but I had always been there for her when it did. The last time I'd seen her like that was the day we said goodbye to each other on her back porch.

Guilt overwhelmed me as I thought of all the times she would have found herself in this exact position when she believed I was dead. I could only imagine the heart wrenching agony she would have been in, knowing that she'd lost everything.

Remembering my own anguish the day I had to let her go, it had felt like my heart had been ripped from my chest, and that was only after a few hours. Bella had been forced to live with that pain for nearly a year by then. Without thinking, I was by her side, a hand on her cheek, guiding her to look at me.

"Tell me, Angel."

Her sad eyes flickered between mine. "That dreams don't always come true."

She was on her feet and out of the room before I could stop her.

~..~..~..~..~..~..~..~

I had been staring at the ceiling for hours when I heard the door close next door as Charlie and Renee left for the doctor. I hadn't seen Bella since she walked away, leaving me alone in the room. Knowing she was only downstairs, I wanted desperately to go to her, comfort her and assure her that everything would be fine, but I couldn't. She needed space and time to deal with the life altering information she'd been given.

In less than two days, she'd learned that her father was dying and everything she believed she knew about me was a lie. She had to face the fact that her life could have been different if I had only come back for her. I had no idea what her life had been like during our years apart but if her anger and violent behavior were any indication, it couldn't have been anything resembling the life I'd lived with Carlisle.

Guilt swept through me again as I thought about the easy life I had lived with my father there to guide me and love me every step of the way. I thought back on how much our lives had changed when Carlisle brought Esme home. I had a mother again. Someone to love me, nurture me and worry about me when I had the slightest bit of trouble in my life.

Bella didn't have to say a word for me to know that she didn't live a life remotely close to that. She may have had that other man in her life to watch out for her and teach her to survive, but that couldn't compare to the family I'd been blessed with. And even that wasn't enough. He had been gone for the past three years and she had been left completely alone in this world.

"Edward."

Bella's voice tore me from my thoughts before I could dwell on them any longer. She still hadn't come upstairs as I had hoped but she was ready to talk, and that was enough.

"Yes, Bella."

"Were you really sick like they said or did you just find a way to leave me?"

Her question stunned me for a moment, leaving me speechless.

"Are you…? How could you…?" I stammered when I was able to speak again.

I couldn't find the right words as hers shattered my heart. She really thought so little of me after all these years that she believed I could do something so deplorable, so unforgivable to her. To the one woman I would ever pledge my heart and life to.

I knew it had been wrong to walk away, to leave her behind and throw our love away as if she had meant nothing to me. But to hear her say that she believed it was possible for me to walk away like every step I took didn't rip my heart to shreds was a pain worse than death. For her to say such a thing confirmed my worst fear.

Bella truly believed I never really loved her.

My body curled in on itself as the pain of that thought threatened to crush me. For fourteen years, I felt the agony as a little piece of my heart died every day I walked this earth without her. It wasn't until the day I'd heard her voice and laid eyes on her beautiful face that my heart became whole again.

With one look, I was saved.

With one sentence, she destroyed me all over again.

"Just give me an answer, Edward." Her impatient voice interrupted my thoughts.

Pain filled my tone as I answered, "Do you really think I'm capable of hurting you that way?" When she didn't answer, I continued. "Even if I didn't love you with every fiber of my being, do you really believe, as your best friend, I could do such a thing?"

"Then how could you not come for me?"

I heard the tiny crack as her pain-filled voice reached my ears and for the first time since laying eyes on her, I was thankful for the distance between us. I needed to tell her the truth but I wasn't sure I could get through it if I was forced to see the pain in her eyes.

"Six weeks should have been nothing," I began, "but every day away from you killed me."

I knew I'd begun my explanation further back than she probably cared to hear, but she needed to know everything…from the beginning.

"I counted the days until it seemed as if each day lasted a lifetime. There were some days when I was so lost in my thoughts of you that I didn't want to leave my room and others when I missed you so much that I didn't even want get out of bed. My mother wouldn't hear of it, though, always finding things for me to do so I was forced to get out of bed.

"Then, a little over two weeks after you left, my father got sick." I paused, suddenly seeing his face in my mind. "I should have known it was more serious than my mother led me to believe, especially when his symptoms only seemed to worsen as the week dragged on. Of course, I was no doctor back then. There was no way I could have possibly known?

"I was dreaming of you when my mother's scream woke me. I ran to their room and saw my father lying on the floor, coughing up blood. We rushed him to the hospital where they told us he had contracted a lethal strain of the Spanish Influenza.

"Being so close to him, my mother and I had already been exposed and, once they were explained to me, I began seeing symptoms in both my mother and myself. It didn't take me long to realize that the three of us would never leave that hospital.

"But I tried to fight it, Bella. You have to believe me. I tried so hard. I couldn't let the illness take me before I saw you again, before I had a chance to say goodbye. I just wasn't strong enough and I gave up when it became too painful to hold on.

"I knew I would never see you again, never get the chance to tell you how much I loved you, or tell you how sorry I was for breaking all of my promises to you, and that hurt worse than dying. I gave in, Bella, and with my last moments, I chose to focus on the happiest times we had shared together and it was your beautiful face in my mind as I closed my eyes for the last time."

"But it wasn't the last time, was it? Your eyes opened again three days later," she yelled, her voice filled with pain. "Three days, Edward, and you were this. You weren't sick anymore, you weren't dying but you still didn't come for me. You left me alone and broken, wishing for death every day just so I could see you and be with you again."

"I couldn't come…not in the beginning."

"You couldn't come?"

Bella's voice in the doorway startled me and I jumped from the bed. She was angry again and I readied myself for another attack.

"No, I…"

"Was I not good enough for you anymore?" she shouted, suddenly in front of me, pushing against my chest.

"That's not…"

She cut me off again. "I didn't fit into your new life, did I, Edward?"

"Stop, you don't understand!" I growled, my temper rising.

"Big bad vampire couldn't be bothered with the human!"

"Bella, just listen!" I was yelling at her now, but she ignored me.

"You didn't want anything to do with me, did you? You wanted to replace me, didn't you?" I blocked her fist before she could connect with my chest. "Just admit it. You didn't come back for me because you wanted someone stronger…better than some pathetic little human."

Furious with her assumptions, I grabbed her hand as she threw her next punch.

"I didn't come back for you because I didn't remember you!" I roared, threw her hand away from me and put some distance between us.

Edward has done so well dealing with Bella's anger and rage, knowing it's to be expected. You can't blame him for losing it a little at the end as she accuses him, again, of not loving her. He loves her with all his heart, but even Edward has limits.

I'm so excited to have another rec for you today. While the subject matter could be difficult to read, the story is absolutely amazing. So, check it out. You won't be sorry.

Que Sera, Sera by Livie79

As always, thank you so much to every new reader that has hit the alert and favorite button. It means a lot to me that you're reading this little story. For all of you who've been with me all along, thanks again for giving Edward and Bella the love you do. Big hugs to everyone. You are all the best. Until next time…much love to you all – D