A\N: Quote from Smashed.

"Oh. My. God."

Buffy's eyelids fluttered open, as a stunned voice pulled her out of a peaceful dream. Dawn was standing speechless in the doorway, gawping at the perfectly content couple, entwined on the bed.

"Dawn?", Buffy questioned, not sure if she was still in her dream or not.

"This is just...I mean why didn't you tell me?", Dawn demanded. Spike was beginning to stir too. Partly because of the steadily increasing pitch of Dawn's voice but mainly from the feel of the Slayer's weight shifting off of the bed.

"There's nothing to tell." Buffy was more awake now as she realised just how excited her sister was becoming.

"But you two were all snuggly and arm wrappy with each other!"

Spike, who had now become aware of what was happening, butted in.

"Sister's right niblet. Nothing' goin' on. Just ended up in a compromising position is all."

Buffy shot him a grateful look, her expression rapidly changing when she saw the crestfallen state of his.

They could both tell that the teenager wasn't convinced.

"Why were you even in here then Spike? Mom said you'd left when she got back."

"Got talkin' to your sis didn't I? Must've fallen asleep. I don't remember much", he lied.

"But -"

"Just leave it Dawn! Don't know what you're expecting to achieve!", he snapped as she began to dig further. It clearly pained him to have to lie to protect Buffy's pride but hell, he should've been used to it by now.

Dawn pouted and sighed before beginning to saunter back down the corrdior but something told the caught out couple that they hadn't heard the last of the littlest Summers' interrogation.

Surprisingly, Buffy was the first to speak.

"Thanks. For last night."

Spike, still perched on the opposite side of the bed, nodded as if he had just fulfilled a mandatory duty.

"Really. It's the first time I haven't been completely focused on trying to get through the day in what feels like weeks."

"Good. 'm glad I could help."

Buffy started to smooth down her clothes in a vain attempt to reduce the quietness of the room. You could cut the tension in the air with a damn knife.

"If you're not ready to be even be the slightest bit honest about me then I don't even know why I'm here. I'm sick of waitin' on you to make up your mind on whether to let me in. Only so much a man can take Buffy."

He collected his duster from the floor, where he'd tossed it last night, and started to make for the door.

"Spike I-", she started, causing Spike to stop in his tracks and turn his head a quarter of the way round.

"It's not that. Not anymore."

The vampire flexed his jaw in frustration.

"Then what? Get a fellow's motor revving, let the tension marinate a couple of days, then bam! Crown yourself the ice queen."

Buffy struggled to put her thoughts and feelings into words for a few seconds.

"It's just...is it wrong that I want something for myself?"

Spike turned to face her, his brilliant blue eyes full of confusion.

"I mean, why do people have to know? I want this to be something no one else knows about. I want it to be mine. Just mine..."

Buffy soon realised that she'd used the wrong choice of words to voice her deceleration as Spike went off on one.

"Once upon a time I would've been happy to be your dirty little secret but things have changed since then."

"Spike, no. That's not what I meant."

She instinctively reached out to place a reassuring hand on his shoulder but he stepped back, still outraged by what he thought she was suggesting.

"Oh, you made it perfectly clear, slayer. Ashamed to tell your friends that a certain vamp does it just right for you?"

A sharp, swift backhand from Buffy made Spike's cheek begin to pulse and sting.

"I told you...it's not like that anymore." Tears of both anger and past shame began bubbling up behind her eyes.

"I don't want the others finding out because I know they'll never understand that you make me feel safe, sightly less scared for my life. I want to spend time with you because when I'm with you, I don't feel as if absolutely everything is crumbling around me."

It was Spike's turn to feel slightly guilty now.

"I don't blame you for thinking what you do. If it were me, I know I would. But I promise you its not."

"You're right. Can't blame a fella", Spike reiterated, choosing to avoid Buffy's last point.

The slayer wasn't afraid to let the tears flow then as she realised how badly she'd handled the situation, especially since the conversation occurred immediately after lying to her sister about everything. She cupped her hands over her face to hide herself but luckily, Spike was in an immediately forgiving mood.

"Hey", he started, walking towards her and pulling her close to him. One hand pressed against the small of her back and the other rested on the back of her head, her face tilting downwards.

"Don't cry alright? Just don't."

She pushed her face further into his chest, doing her best to block out everything around her as she continued to uncontrollably weep. It was as if her body physically couldn't hold in all the anger and fear anymore. It was demanding to be heard just like it demanded her to feel it over all these months.

"I'm here. I'm whatever you need me to be. You want me to go, I'll get as far away as I can. You want me to stay, I promise not to let anyone or anything drive me away. Just don't cry.

Spike stopped himself there, refusing to let his inner poet escape the confines of the soul buried deep within him.

"You got that Summers?"

"Got it..."

Meanwhile, Joyce was pottering around downstairs, preparing for the day when there was a knock at the door. That was odd. It was stil very early, even for Willow and Tara, and since Giles was already here, the mother of 2 had no idea who it was. She opened the door to set eyes on quite a short, elderly man. He was almost completely bald with silvery grey hair and dressed in a smart suit, complete with waistcoat and striped jacket.

Joyce eyed him, suspiciously.

"Can I help you?"

The man smiled slightly.

"Hello Mrs Summers. Is your daughter around?"

Little did Joyce know that Giles had spotted the elder standing in the doorway and was now fixed to the spot. At almost the same time, the man too spotted him.

"Rupert. Its been a while."

Giles could barely utter a word he was in so much shock.

"Travers..."