CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
The Devoted blindly follow Demise.
She eased into the seat and tried to chase away any fears she might have had. There were twelve Vamps here, mostly woman. These were the people that went into hiding even after being pardoned by the counsel. These people who disappeared from society at young ages to follow Kalona unconditionally. These people worshipped him; gave up entire lives for him, why couldn't one of them have been chosen?
"hello my dear, my name is Amelia." The woman with deep black eyes said calmly. "you must be dame." Dame nodded and tried to appear pleasant. She couldn't. Nyx had visited her again the night before and it set her on edge.
"I will ask you this once my dear. Do you choose to turn away from me?" it made her angry. Why should this woman have any right to be her leader in the first place?
"What have you done for me that should make me think otherwise? You didn't protect my father from being killed by your priestess. You didn't protect him or my mother the day an entire town burnt them to the ground like Salem witches. You didn't protect me from Nehemiah. You didn't discourage Zoey from trying to bring my father back as nothing more than a tool! Even the people you have chosen are selfish. Why would I want to learn from someone who makes a decision like that?"
"You only feel that way because he was you father. What of the decision you're about to make? You will choose to slaughter humans? That is what will happen. Do you acknowledge and accept the consequences of your actions?"
"What human do I care enough for to save? What has any one of them ever done for me?"
"You father."
"MY father let a rapist roam free of charge. MY father let him back into our home the moment I left. MY father left my sister alone in the house after she was scared out of her mind of her own shadow. MY father mind as well had crashed the car himself. My father was so wrapped up in his work all the time he didn't even know what was going on in his own house! A Year! Three hundred and sixty five fucking days, and he didn't take one of them to ask why there was a bruise on my shoulder or where I got the hicky on my neck; why I was always hiding in my room or why I hadn't made any friends at school? You want to know who my Father was? He was the man who you let burn to death because you're too much of god damn coward to strike down a town that obviously deserves it! They hated your kind and you let them live. What did you get from it? Two of the best Vampyres I've ever known, who'd done nothing but help that god awful town were murdered and they made their daughter watch the fires burn from the window! You know what the last words my mother said to me were? She told me 'may Nyx be with you.' When have you EVER been with me? You're no better than the people of faith's god. You don't help, you watch and snatch away lives when they've done nothing but worship you! I will follow through with our plans, I will change this world for the better of MY people. If I shed a little human blood on the way, they have 6.4 billion more just like um!"
Just like that the dream evaporated, but the thought stayed with her. She had decided to turn away from Nyx completely. There was no going back now. Her path was set and she could do nothing to change it.
The meeting commenced and Danielle greeted the Vamps as anyone would.
"Merry meet." She said and the crowd rang out in unison 'Merry meet'. Some habits die hard and dame could see the similarities the Kalona followers had to the Nyx worshippers. Many argued that the Vamps should still worship Nyx and Danielle agreed that they should keep up the illusion. They mainly talked of politics; how the new government would be set up. The Vamps didn't want a dictatorship, but Danielle argued that a Democracy would never work. If everyone had a say, agreements would never be reached. Danielle argued that Kalona would show the way and that one person would be better to look out for betterment of the people. They discussed what would become of the humans and every one of the members agreed, "Breakfast, Lunch, and Dinner"
The meeting was drawing to an end and there was only one thing left to do.
How? She asked him. He spoke from time to time, but it was far less frequent than before. She had the unavoidable feeling he was becoming weaker. Her emotions were getting to her again and it seemed her judgment was waning further at every comment in the room. It wasn't the full throttle of diminishing emotions it once had been but it was surely far more present than it had been.
Don't worry my dear. Soon I will be free of this prison and I will show you how to control that issue. He began weakly. Was it doubt that made his voice falter as it did? Did Nyx's words truly get to her at an unrecognizable level? Surely he would have knowledge of such dreams. Surely if she had felt any discontent he would assure her of her destiny. But not a word had been mention. She felt the need to hide these thoughts from him and found that her attempts had proved sufficient. He made no comment about her recent thoughts. Let go. He told her. He'd said this before but before she had been afraid; before she had been weak and distressed. It is always easier to give up your will when you think you have no use for having it. Now she had a mind to keep her freedom and though her logic said this was a small thing to ask her instinct screamed it might be the last thing she does on her own. Her instinct nagged at the idea that the more power she gave him over her the more power she would lose and he would maintain. Embry's words played in her mind. No! do you think Kalona would want to be trapped in the body of a teenage girl forever?! Ha! What she said made since. Why would Kalona want to be a woman forever? Like always Dame ignored her intuition and did as he said. She stood in front of the entire crowd and let go of her hold on reality and plunged into the euphoria of the abyss. She felt her control slipping as well as his growing. Finally she was but a voice in her own mind once more. He spoke to the crowd in his own voice this time and she imagined humorously how that might look from the outside. She tuned out of what he was saying and mentally closed her eyes.
She had an idea. She couldn't retrieve certain memories from her mind as he could when he was in this state, maybe she could now. She reached for memories of her mother and father, hoping to find comfort in them. What she found was a wake up call.
"Soleil what is going on? What are you doing?" Isaac asked as he entered the man hole hidden under the carpet it wasn't much of a shrine but it was the best they could do in this town. "Soleil, there's no time for a prayer you need to go to your interview. That position at the school won't wait forever."
She turned to him and her tear strained face revealed much more than the need for a quick prayer. "I was wrong Isaac." She whispered. She tilted slightly and he saw his daughter. Dame wiggled happily on the altar.
"What is she doing down here?" He asked.
"I have to do something. I need to save her." She whispered fearfully.
"what are you doing Phoebe?" his voice was serious now. He had accepted many things without question but this did not follow the guidelines he had set for Soleil. She was straying from the path she had set for their daughter and he feared that, that would put her in danger. "She's not a child of Nyx anymore Soleil. We've gone over this."
"She isn't human!" she shouted for the fifth time since Dame was born.
"You know that's not what I meant. I don't know how or why- that was your doing- but she doesn't belong to Nyx anymore. That is what my gut tells me." He said calmly, though you could hear the tension in his voice.
"I know." She admitted quietly. "And I'm trying to fix that."
"Do you feel this is the right thing to do?" The main reason he trusted Phoebe's judgment was because it was her affinity. She was Judgment incarnate. She knew by instinct what the best thing to do was and she always listened to her instincts. Phoebe nodded fiercely and hid the eminent feeling of fear she had for their lives. Soon they would die and she knew there was nothing she could do about it. When she thought back to asking Kalona to resurrect them once more the pain she felt when the war began came rushing to the surface. It collided with her thoughts of her daughter and let out an alarm she was sure the entire room could feel. The decision she had made nearly a year ago had been a bad one. The price it came at was far greater than she could have imagined and her daughter would be the one to pay it. Nyx had visited her and told her of that cost. For what she gained her daughter would know nothing but lost. She would lose anyone she might ever care about and betray those who care about her. She would be destruction incarnate unless they did something fast. She was doing what she should have done a year ago. She should have accepted Isaacs's death and taken Dame as a gift in return. She should have given her over to Nyx at birth as was customary for Vamp born children. But most of all she should have listened to the very thing that had guided her to her destiny with Isaac; the very affinity given to her the moment she was marked. She should have listened to her instincts.
Dame screamed as she refrained from the memory. It wasn't completely hers but she knew Kalona had nothing to do with it. Nyx she thought. Kalona had shown her the truth, but only part of it. He had to have known what Phoebe had done. He knew everything Dame knew. He knew of her mother's betrayal and he led her to believe that this was what her mother had wanted up until the moment she died. The thoughts of Phoebe's last words came flooding into her mind. May Nyx be with you. That was all her mother had said as the mob dragged her away. It was exactly what she'd hoped for. She'd given her daughter over to Nyx in hopes that she might protect her from the deal that was struck nearly four years before. Her mother made that deal and ignored her instincts. She had decided to save her love without the slightest consideration as to what the price would be. Now Dame was paying it.
Kalona! Dame tried to shout. But he never responded. She could still hear him speaking to the crowd so she must still be in her own head.
He can't hear you dear. No one can. This is the part of you I rule over. Dame this is your intuition. He doesn't have any power over this gift. Nyx said calmly. Her body as well as a figment of Dames appeared. Dame lunged at her.
Why did you show me that?! Why do you lie?! She said. Tears forming.
I did not lie dame and neither did Kalona. He showed you part of the past and I showed you the rest. That is just as much a part of your infant memory as it is a part of my knowledge.
I did NOT know what my mother was thinking.
Yes I do admit that was my doing. I have a gateway to all of my children's minds, your mother's especially. She does after all have an affinity for empathy. She never fully mastered it but she managed to pass it on to you.
What are you talking about?
You have the ability to look at someone and know at least partially what they feel, think and plan to do. It is why you can so easily become what they expect or in recent cases bring forth their weaknesses and use them for destruction. You are using Zoey's need to trust in me against her.
Are you going to tell your precious little prodigy?
I have interfered enough in Zoey's path there are things she must decide for herself. She must learn to fend for herself in order to become the high priestess I know she will be. You were meant for that path as well. It is the reason I have let you obtain your mother's affinity. You choose to ignore that gift. You trust those that bring you ruin and ignore your intuition out of fear that it may betray you. You look to logic and material things as proof of trust and that will lead to your demise. It is that part of you that Kalona has stake in. he influences your logic and makes things look simplistic.
I don't care what you say.
You still don't trust me. But do not blame me for their deaths Dame De'vie Eternelle. Phoebe chose her fate and Isaac avoided it for only a matter of time.
MY father did nothing wrong to deserve death.
No one deserves death Dame. It is a matter of fate. We choose our destinies and where they might end every moment of our lives. Isaac chose to fight and Neferet chose to kill. Their fates collided. Phoebe ignored her affinity and chose to advert fate. She paid the price for that only partially. Now you are paying it in full. I told you dame that I would not force you to chose alliance with me. I have never rescinded a gift and I never will. You were given a destiny far before you were even conceived; now you are given a choice.
She was pulled back into reality as Kalona retreated to his region in her mind. She still had questions for Nyx. She needed to know things only someone with an immediate connection to her mother could answer. She tried to summon her to her mind as she'd done to Kalona many times before. It was no use and dame had no choice but to decide what to do now.
You're shielding your mind from me Dame. He said. She hadn't realized she was but was grateful for it anyway.
Feminine details I wouldn't want my father to know. She gave him a mental smile and could feel his happiness in return.
Were you listening to my speech? She pulled the images of the beginning of his speech to the front of her head. Very well. He said and she could feel him retreat further into his hiding place. Embry came bouncing up to her in a matter a moments.
"that was the weirdest thing I have ever seen. You sounded like a total dude Damey… a totally hot dude might I add." She giggled. "Ugh I've only had a statue to look at but I'm sure Kalona is the hottest dude on the face of the earth." Dame thought back to what she had been shown. Kalona was beautiful. Now that she thought about it, he maintained the same exotic beauty dame did. Dame had to wonder if he had something to do with her being unusually stunning. It was natural for the product of two very astonishing Vampyre to produce an equally wonderful human child but Dame went far and beyond those standards. She was well over the usual Vamp beauty when she was only human. It would make since that his blood would make her more eye-catching. Was it his influence that made her look more like her mother than her father? This made her furious. She loved her father he seemed to be the only one in this entire mess that seemed to merely want to do the right thing. He's done nothing from the beginning but do what he thought was right. He died trying to protect the freedoms he was train to believe in. Dame loved her mother but she still felt a bit of fury towards her for what she had done. Sure she had gained a father. But she only gained him to lose both in childhood. She was paying the price for her mother's mistakes. She'd lost everything, including her sister.
Dame took a moment to evaluate her life. Why was she blaming her mother? Nyx had to be lying. Dame had family, she had friends. She hadn't lost them, they found her. How could she be cursed when she had such wonderful people in her life now? Even if she had lost both her parents, the point is that she had them at some point. They loved her unconditionally and her mother had done nothing but try and make sure she knew what it felt like to have a father that love her to no avail. She banished the thoughts of her mother as a villain. She'd done nothing wrong. Who had done something was Kalona. The only person who she believed had never lied to her had kept key points in her mother's past away from her. He'd done so to influence her choices and she'd played right into his plan. Dame had to get out of this, but how? She had turned away from Nyx for the third time. Kalona was in her head, she couldn't run away from him. And her Family. Embry and Danielle were all she had now. She couldn't leave them to their Demise. Danielle had been brainwashed into believing this was the right thing, but she could still save Embry. Somehow, some way she needed to get out and if anyone could help her it was Zoey.
It was time to tell Zoey the truth.
The week rolled by and Dame maintained a stoic manner about things. She felt guilty about faking happiness, but she needed to. She didn't know how Danielle would act if she knew how dame felt now. She didn't think Danielle would be pleased with her backing out like she planned to do. No one spoke of what was to come next. Danielle said they needed to have one more meeting to settle things before Kalona could be freed. Dame didn't have to attend this one and she took that with ease. She was happy she wouldn't need to let go again and even happier that the meeting stalled time for her to figure out how she was going to get away.
The last night before school started, Dame and Embry had their end of vacation movie night. Dame hadn't thought it possible but her stomach had protruded further over her waist line. Yet and still she gorged on the sweet delicacies of the family room pantry that she had stole away in her bag before leaving the house. She'd tried sweets with names she couldn't even pronounce and every one of them was tastier than the one before.
"Ugh, school. Is it really necessary?" Embry pouted. Dame shrugged her shoulders and stuffed her eighth chocolate bunny of the night down her throat, barely chewing.
"You're going to choke." Embry chided.
"you already said that." Dame said through a mouth full of food. She beat her record as another bunny made its way into her mouth.
"You've been quiet these past few days?" she said suddenly and dame really did choke. She hacked up the pile of what once were four large bunnies while trying to find a lie that would satisfy Embry. Danielle was willing to believe anything Dame said but Embry was more observant than that.
"You happy, I choked!" she said.
"What's been up with you lately. Ever since the meeting you've been… well more out of it than usual."
"He's been speaking to me." She blurted out in a string of incoherent mumbles, but Embry caught it anyway. she eyed dame skeptically and then opened her mouth to speak.
"About what?" Dame hesitated.
"About… well, about what it will be like after all this is over." She stared dreamily out into space trying to make her lie credible. Embry watched her expression and continued to probe.
"Like what?" Embry asked her voice a low hiss.
Dame yawned and curled in on herself. "Embry can we talk about this in the morning. I'm exhausted and you know I have to get up earlier than everyone else for these ridiculous lessons with Zoey." My only opportunity. She thought. Embry sighed and threw a pillow at her.
"Fine, go to bed and I'll see you in the morning." Dame nodded, got up lazily and dragged herself to her room, locking the door behind her. Not that it mattered. Dame knew better than anyone a lock of any proportion wouldn't keep Embry from breaking and entering. She closed her eyes and attempted to find rest. The bunnies agreed but the anxious feeling she had did not. Tomorrow she would have to ally herself with Zoey and she certainly wasn't looking forward to it.
Everything will work itself out, my dear. Not Kalona, as she was use to, but Nyx. Dame found surprising comfort in this voice. There was none of the uneasiness she'd ignored when listening to kalona. The maternal instincts of this voice were natural and wonderful and whole. She felt whole.
At that the anxiousness seemed to recede. She closed her eyes and felt a weightlessness that drove even her nightmares to parish.
I know this chapter was a long time coming and some of my readers are probably pissed off right now, but i wanted to make sure it fit with the next chapter. I'm sure the Anti-Kalona crew are pleased. (i.e. the reviewer who said Kalona must die). Again i'd like to thank you all for Taking this journey with me and i really hope your all giving my other stories a chance. Of course everything can't be for everyone, but i hope at least a chance was given. review please. give me your thoughts and opinion, convictions and all the love and respect in my ownership.
Sincerely, Dee