III

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HOW TO SURVIVE A MODERN AU

Chapter 2 – Nightmares

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"Demons (acoustic—live in London)" Imagine Dragons


Danika stepped out of the shower to towel-dry herself when she heard the sound. It was a soft and breathy, but consistent, and she wondered if it was just normal, everyday background noise from the hotel room. But as she slipped her robe sleeves over her arms and tied the front of it, she walked barefoot into the bedroom and her heart stopped.

Kili was sitting on the floor with his back against the side of the bed, knees bent and hands holding his temples as he took measured breaths. She could see his wrists shaking and noted that the room was cold—was the air conditioner really on that high?— and uncomfortably stuffy.

"Kili?" Danika took a tentative step toward him and he continued to breathe in an out faster than was normal.

He didn't seem to hear her, so she sat down next to him and put a hand on his knee, hoping she wouldn't startle him by touching him. It wasn't often he ended up like this, but she was already familiar with these moments. He was strong and resilient, but the mind could only take so much before his body and mind refused to function—so many different stories he'd had to live and then an experience of traveling through other universes… something was bound to overwhelm him sooner or later.

Leaning forward and stretching her finger to the air conditioner, Danika turned it off and reached over her head for the blankets, surrounding Kili in a protective barrier and waiting until he returned to reality on his own. She sat beside him patiently, stroking her fingers through his hair and keeping a blank face—she knew that when Kili surfaced from his lapse, he would eagerly be looking for a reaction from her to convince himself that he was either safe or in danger, and she'd already made the mistake once of panicking while he did.

Kili's breaths seemed to be slowing and Danika allowed herself to breathe a small sigh of relief. As if waking up from a dream, his eyes roamed over his surroundings and locked onto her face. She thought that his expression looked grateful at first, but then it melted into shame. It was obvious that he was embarrassed in having this problem, but Danika didn't think any less of him for it—having seen him in battle and knowing what lengths he would go to in protecting those he loved. No amount of reassurance convinced him, though; even strong minds could succumb to fear, Danika had said, but Kili despised the anxiety attacks and looked at them as a weakness he shouldn't be showing.

"I turned off the air, it should warm up in here pretty quickly." Danika said, rubbing his arms through the blanket.

He nodded, but didn't say anything.

"Kili," Danika scooted closer to him, wrapping an arm around his shoulders. "Maybe this is too much change, too soon." She peered into his face, but he refused to meet her eyes. "Maybe we should head somewhere more familiar."

"Familiar?" He croaked.

"Somewhere… more green, maybe." She kissed his cheek and rested her head on his shoulder. "A place where we can plant a garden, maybe have rocking chairs on our porch and watch the fireflies in the evening. You told me you lived in a setting like that once, and that you liked it. Maybe the desert is just too different."

"Maybe." Kili nodded his head with a look that said he was considering her words. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize, you've done nothing wrong." She patted his shoulder, standing up and offering him a hand. She knew she couldn't possibly be of any help in getting his heavy, thick body off of the floor, but she was glad that Kili humored her and took her hand. "I'm sorry. You woke up alone, I know you don't like that. Next time, I won't shower until you're up and about."

Kili snorted in disgust. "You shouldn't have to do that. I'm not a child."

"Stop it." Danika held up a finger. "We're not doing this again. You're not a child—you're a brave and handsome dwarf who's carried his fair load of extremes for long enough," she untied the knot of the sash and let the robe fall from her shoulders. "And you're all mine to take care of."

"Hmm." The corner of his mouth twitched into a lopsided smile. "When you put it that way…" His fingers brushed against the skin at her hips. "Maybe I don't mind you taking care of me."


"Thinking Out Loud" Ed Sheeran


Kili took a sip from his cup of coffee and sighed happily. It didn't matter what temperature they rode through—Arizona, New Mexico, or Oklahoma, as they'd travelled the distance—a hot mug of black coffee did the trick in settling Kili's nerves.

Danika reached over the table of the diner for the container of sugar and proceeded to drop the majority of the shaker's contents into her own mug of coffee.

Kili sneered. "I don't understand how you can drink something so sickeningly sweet." Resting his elbows on the table across from her, he shifted his seating on the uncomfortable booth and watched her smile smugly at him.

"Saccherine." She said after she began to stir the sugar in.

"Sacha-what?" Kili's eyebrows came together.

"It means 'sickeningly sweet'. That's the word you're looking for." Danika winked at him.

"Does it, now?" He grinned and shook his head, pulling the wrinkled map out of his black, denim jacket pocket. Unfolding the map on the table, his eyes searched for their location, tracking their progress over the long road.

"Georgia." Danika pointed at their end goal. "Green, but still warm. And it's closer to Fili and Sigrid."

Kili nodded, tracing their route with a pencil and remembering her first description of it. It had taken a few days for Kili to reconcile with the idea of leaving the desert, but Danika was persuasive and his resistance died down quickly when she gave him a description of the land that awaited them. And somehow… distance from Fili had made things worse. As many times as the two were at odds with each other, Fili was still a part of home for Kili.

"And it has fireflies." Kili added with a smile, knowing it was more a point of interest for her than him.

"Yes, it does." She smiled back, rubbing her foot along his leg under the table.

"We're going to have to pace ourselves. That motorcycle can't be comfortable for your backside after three days of riding."

"Or yours." Danika fixed him with a stern look. He laughed at that—always turning everything around on him!—and took up the map, folding it before returning it to his jacket and then taking her hand on the table.

"Tell me when you need a longer break than a few hours." He insisted, letting her know she wasn't the only concerned spouse. "I don't mind lingering for a few days."

"Neither do I." She squeezed his hand. "I wasn't joking when I said this was the way I wanted to spend my honeymoon."

"I still don't really believe that." He rolled his eyes and took a sip of his coffee. "I still think we should get a car."

"We will. But I'm not making you get rid of the motorcycle."

Thank you. He thought, inwardly. Kili didn't mind how different it was to drive a car instead of riding a pony, but the bike came close enough to make it familiar. And there were already so many things he was having to adapt to.

Like the sudden burst of music coming from the phone in his pocket.

"That's you." Danika said before she drank her coffee.

Phones. Kili would rather have done without, but Thorin had insisted on getting his nephew the latest model and paying for the service of it to keep tabs on both him and Fili. Shoving his hand into his pocket and touching the screen of the phone to accept the call, Kili rolled his eyes.

"Yes?"

"That's not how you answer a phone-call." Said Fili's voice on the other side of the line.

"That's not how you answer a phone-call." Said Danika from across the table.

"Oh, shove off." Kili shook his head at both of them. "Did you need something?"

"Just wanted to see if you'd passed into Alabama, yet."

"Nope. We're resting at the border of Oklahoma."

"Please, tell me it's the border of Oklahoma and Arkensas." Fili moaned.

"Other side," Kili snorted a laugh. "New Mexico. Anxious much?"

"You're just taking your time, is all."

"Fili," Kili groaned. "I'm on my honeymoon. Are you really calling me to tell me to hurry up?"

"Yes." Even Danika could hear the answer from where she sat, and she sent Kili an "aww" look. "Let me talk to your wife."

"And let you convince her to speed things up? Not a chance." Kili mashed the button to end the call and jammed the phone back into his pocket.

"And that's not how you end a phone-call." Danika tutted. Her own phone began to ring and Kili knew it was his brother without seeing her look of recognition at the screen. While Kili had been hesitant to accept a phone from Thorin, he couldn't speak for his wife—who gratefully accepted Thorin's offer to her, knowing that if Kili was in a mood to refuse calls, she wouldn't.

"Stop whining." Danika muttered in response to something Fili said. "You're the one that chose to go to that school, if you don't like it—" He said something to make her pause. "Fili…Fili, no, we're not talking about that, yet. And no, I don't want you discussing it with him first."

Danika mouthed "sorry" at Kili before doing exactly what he'd done before: ending the call and putting the phone back into her pocket.

"What was that?" Kili raised an eyebrow at her.

"Nothing," She shook her head. "He still thinks we should settle in a neighborhood with the white picket fence and the children who go to school together."

"And what do you think about that?" Kili asked. In all honesty, he wasn't sure what she really wanted out of a life with him, and they hadn't spoken much of it because she was hesitant to talk when they were still figuring out where to settle. And it was ironic, but somehow a cookie-cutter life in a mundane world frightened him more than charging towards danger in another world.

"I haven't decided yet." She pressed her lips into a line with an open expression. "I'll tell the truth when I have, I promise. But for now, this—" She turned her head and smiled at the open window, "—traveling with you is perfect." Rising and leaning over the table, she lowered her face to his and kissed him quickly before sitting down and finishing her coffee.


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I apologize, there was a problem with the chapters, so if you feel like you missed one, just go back in the chapter selection and read the one before "Kili's First Bike". Also, thank you to those who informed me of the chapter title mistake (I really appreciate that). Any time you find typos or errors, please please please bring those to my attention. I usually have a friend edit for me, but this story has just been a casual adventure and I didn't want to take up their time.

Next up:

Georgia, Fili and Sigrid, and neighbors Kili doesn't get along with