Late Arrivals and Lifetime Rivals: Snape's Worst Halloween

NOTE: I need to take a break and go back and review my notes and well, basically, write the rest of this. Thank you so much for the reviews, alerts, and especially the favorites. The party is not nearly over. Also…let's just say that LATE ARRIVAL just might be, kind of, sort of, perhaps, maybe overlapping into another story I am currently working on that is already up. Er, I think I just said too much… Well, on with the party and I promise I will get back to this as soon as it is worthy for you to view and er, I write the rest of it. Thanks so much!

Chapter 28: A Kiss For A Hag

Septima went to the bathroom in the Riddle House in order to contact Sirius Black who had been checking in to make fun of Severus Snape for most of the evening. She noticed the charmed snake and bones decorations throughout the corridor on the way to the loo. She had to hold back a few chuckles herself as she tried to block out the image of raucous, barking laughter if she opened the compact and let Sirius feast his eyes on the Halloween, er decorating scheme that the Dark Lord had chosen. However, she would never risk being found out in a roomful of swarming Death Eaters.

"Sirius, please, only for emergencies," she pleaded to the compact after the door was shut.

"I can not help myself, luv. He really…used the basilisk costume again?" he coughed. Septima knew he was trying to stifle an onslaught of loud laughter because he knew he might not be able to stop, just like when Snape first wore the costume to 12 Grimmauld Place for last year's party.

There were days when Sirius nearly went crazy hiding out at his home, but he would have given anything to be able to be at the pub to witness Snape looking like a complete ass again in that costume. What he wouldn't have given in order to attend.

At one point last year, after meeting eyes with a livid Molly, Sirius and Harry had escaped to the kitchen. Molly opened the door to check on them once Severus was up in the bathroom, and they had had tears of mirth streaming from their eyes. They had been trying to calm themselves down before they had to enter the living room.

"Yes, you know he did."

"Fine, I will let you go," said Sirius sheepishly. But if Severus should ask…Harry is with me…and Gry---Gryffindor's sword is in…Dumbleodore's office. So Snivellus, I mean, Snape, is quite safe."

Sirius convulsed with laughter again. He had tried to restrain himself but he just couldn't.

Septima sighed. Black still couldn't keep it together over the costume. She closed the compact and silenced the uncontrollable laughs yet again.

She stepped out into the dark corridor, lit only by the glowing eyes of the shoddy decorations. It was so dark she wouldn't have seen anyone but she saw Snape. Because nobody, not even in pitch darkness, would be able to not see the sheen of his green-sequined basilisk costume.

The basilisk's neck was livid.

She looked at the neck and her eyes met those of Snape. Snape was glaring at her. He did not look pleased. Well, he never was but this was different.

"Give me the mirror…now!" said Snape in a low threatening tone.

Alecto passed, so Septima and Snape began planning their cover-up, hoping the buck-toothed dolt Alecto did not hear the part about the mirror.

Snape took action. An unpleasant action he thought, but something so vile that he knew that Alecto would thoroughly be distracted and he and Septima---quite off the hook, as they say. Quite necessary under the circumstances…

Snape turned to Alecto. Well, the snake head did first, before his actual head.

"My, er, girlfriend," said Snape weakly between his teeth, "is quite funny, really."

"Yes," Septima played along with him. "He sends me cockroach clusters all of the time. He has a standing order over at Honeydukes," Septima tried to preen the best she could as a lovesick dolt, however, the hag noise that came out of her transfigured self was quite horrifying.

"Well, I do, as a matter of fact. I know you find them far too enjoyable," winced Snape.

"Darling…" said the hag as gracefully as Septima could muster.

"Really…in public? Oh, very well then…"replied Snape, ignoring Septima's horror about what she guessed he was about to do.

She had been placed in this position before. It was utterly revolting, but if her safety amidst Death Eaters was at stake, so what about her self-respect?

Snape grabbed the shocked hag by the elbows and gave her a quick, soft kiss.

Alecto burst into tears, the mirror quite forgotten and stormed off. True, she was not as attractive as Narcissa, or even Bellatrix when she was younger, or even the still lovely Mrs. Zabini…but damn it…a hag?

Poor Alecto never found out that her brother had tried to bribe the goblin, Griphook from Gringotts into at least taking his sister out on a date. When Amycus showed Griphook a picture he assured him that even if he promised him the entire contents of the Malfoy family vault currently sealed at Gringotts…his answer was and always would be a very firm "no."

Snape had closed his eyes, using every bit of occlumency knowledge he had practiced over the years to block out the hag image when he kissed her.

Septima looked about ready to slap the snake head…but considering in whose presence she was in, she managed to compose herself. Voldemort, attired as a very sad imitation of Dumbleodre, could sweep in with purple and blue, star-spangled robes at any minute.

Alecto told the rest of the party what she had encountered. They were disgusted, picturing the basilisk's neck kissing a hag.

Snape thought that now Vector wouldn't be on speaking terms with him for the rest of the night and well into tomorrow.

Just as he had hoped…and he had gotten rid of Alecto also.

Sometimes he marveled at his own brilliance.

And then he heard sounds coming from the compact that had opened during their embrace.

"If he acts like a git, luv…go for the eyes…" Sirius eyed one of Voldemort's crappy decorations and shut his mirror.

He couldn't wait to inform his godson, Harry.