Brittany closed the door to Mackenzie's room, after waiting until her daughter finally fell asleep, and walked across the hall to Carter's room, she leaned against the door frame, smiling at Santana, who sat on the corner of Carter's bed singing softly to him as he slept.
"Come to bed, Sanny, let him rest." Brittany whispered.
Santana glanced up and shook her head, she focused her eyes back on Carter, stroking his hair. "I have to make sure he's okay, he's like this because of me, B." She sniffled. "I have to watch him tonight, the first time I had an attack I had a few that night, so..."
"So you have to watch him." Brittany nodded, understanding Santana's thought process. She left the room and came back a few minutes later with a comforter from the hall closet. "Come lay with me in the recliner." She nodded to Carter's black leather oversized recliner in the corner. "Come on baby, you need to rest too, and you can still watch him."
Santana stared at the chair, watching Brittany get the chair set up with pillows, she sat down and opened her arms, "come on baby." Santana internally debated before kissing Carter on the forehead, watching his face frown before smoothing back out and walking over to Brittany. "He's not like this because of you." Brittany reminded her as she snuggled close in her arms, wrapping the comforter over their laps.
Santana sighed. "Yes he is."
Brittany kissed her on the cheek and pulled her closer, "okay, yes he is." She nodded against Santana's shoulder. "He's resting now because of your help, he's breathing normally because you were able to keep your breathing steady, so yes he is like this because of you, so thank you."
Santana wiped the tears from her eyes, and nodded against Brittany's chest. "How do you do it, B?"
"Do what?" Brittany asked as Santana curled more into her embrace, and she began to rub her back.
"Stay so calm when I'm like that, I've had so many panic attacks and you are always so calm." Santana stated.
Brittany shrugged. "How were you able to stay so calm just now?"
Santana sighed. "I just wanted to make sure Carter was okay, nothing else mattered."
"Exactly." Brittany stated softly, pulling Santana in her lap and kissing her on the temple. "Get some rest Sanny, I love you, baby."
Santana finally tore her eyes off of Carter and pressed her lips to Brittany's. "I love you." She mumbled against her lips before breaking the kiss and resting her head in the crook of Brittany's neck.
6am
Santana stayed awake most of the night, staring at Carter, counting the number of times he inhaled and exhaled, and allowing Brittany soft breaths hitting the side of her neck relax her. She would drift to sleep for a moment before jerking away when Carter would start to snore, Brittany would force her eyes open to check on Santana, rubbing her side to calm her back down as she fell back to sleep herself after she knew Carter was okay.
"Morning." Brittany rasped sliding her hand from under Santana's shirt, where it was resting on her back.
"Morning." Santana replied with a tired smile.
"You look so tired." Brittany frowned. "Did you sleep at all?"
Santana shook her head and hugged Brittany tightly. "No."
"Are you too having sex in my room, because..." Carter teased as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. "I always dream of having two chicks in my room but you're my moms and are ruining it." He laughed as Brittany sighed and shook her head at him.
Santana jumped up and ran over to his bed. "Hey, how are you feeling?" She asked sitting down next to him and running her fingers through his hair.
"Fine." Carter replied slowly, raising one eyebrow at her, moving his head since he hated for anyone to touch his hair.
"Think you are okay to go to school?" Brittany asked with a smile as she stood up and folded up the blanket.
Carter nodded and got out of bed. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be?" He grinned while stretching. "I'm thinking of wearing lime green today." He stated walking to his closet.
"Carter, baby boy, let's talk." Santana suggested.
"Can't, french toast sticks at Burger King are calling my name this morning." He laughed as he flipped through the clothes in his closet, settling for a lime green and sky blue Ralph Lauren polo, he then went to his other closet and began to look through his jeans.
"I just need to know how you're feeling, when I had my first panic attack..." Santana started.
Carter pulled a pair of light denim jeans out and a box of shoes, tossing them on the bed. "I didn't have a panic attack." He snapped. "I need to get dressed for school." He added softer.
"Come on San." Brittany smiled, squeezing her wife's shoulder, instantly picking up that Carter, much like his mother, didn't want to talk after his attack. "Let's get Mackenzie up for school."
"Carter." Santana frowned. "You don't remember last night?"
"I remember and I'm fine." Carter snapped, walking into the bathroom and slamming the door, a few moments later loud music began to blare so Santana rolled her eyes and headed towards the door, Brittany walking right after her.
Brittany heard Santana sniffle and grabbed her hand to spin her around. "He's exactly how you are, well how you were after an attack, he doesn't want to talk about it, Sanny. You can't force him too, he looks good this morning, he slept the night away, and he seems to be in a good mood this morning, when he's ready to talk...he will."
Santana sighed. "Fine, can you put on a pot of coffee for the two of us? I want to talk to Mackenzie this morning?"
"Of course." Brittany smiled. "Bagel or a muffin?"
"Either is fine." Santana nodded, leaning up to kiss on the corner of the mouth, Brittany hugged her tightly, knowing her wife needed extra love today before finally letting her go. Santana smiled at her and headed to Mackenzie's room, she walked in and saw her daughter lying in bed, her headphones on her ears. Santana could hear her own voice blaring and immediately blushed. Mackenzie always played her mother's music, Santana was truly her favorite artist and she made sure the world knew.
Santana reached over and turned off her iPod, she then laid in bed next to daughter facing her, reaching over to grab a tissue out of the box by her head, she dabbed Mackenzie's face, wiping her tears away before carefully sliding her headphones off of her ears. Mackenzie opened her eyes and locked them with Santana's soft caring ones.
"Is Carter okay?" Mackenzie asked quietly.
"Yes, he's awake and getting ready for school." Santana nodded running her fingers through Mackenzie's hair. "How long have you been giving Carter my anxiety pills?" She then asked.
"I'm sorry." Mackenzie shook her head before choking on a sob. "I'm sorry mommy."
Santana sighed and pulled her into a tight hug, rubbing her back. "Calm down, honey." She cooed into her blonde hair as Mackenzie continued to sob in her mother's arms, clutching tightly to her.
After Mackenzie finally calmed down, Santana leaned back and used the pad of her thumb to wipe her tears away. "How long have you been giving Carter my pills?" She repeated. "I need to know, Mackenzie."
"A few weeks." She finally responded. "He, um, he didn't know I was taking them from you. I told him they were aspirin."
"I need you to be completely honest right now...has Carter had a panic attack before and you two just hid it?" Santana asked softly yet sternly.
Mackenzie quickly shook her head. "No, I swear this is the first one." She sniffled and wiped her nose before hugging Santana again. "He would just come to room at night when he couldn't sleep and lay on the end of the bed, I would put a wet towel on his neck, like momma does for you, and play your music for him, if it didn't work then I would get your pills."
"I was so scared last night mommy." She mumbled.
Santana nodded. "You knew Carter was having problems, so why not come to us, Mackenzie. You know how to spot anxiety from dealing it mine growing up, why didn't you come to us?" She took a deep breath. "What are you some of Carter's tells."
"He snaps his fingers against his thigh, and he blinks a lot really fast." Mackenzie explained.
Santana nodded while she processed the information before pursing her lips in thought. "I know you want to prove your loyalty to your brothers, and you want them to see you as a friend and not just their little sister, but there are certain things you have to tell momma and me, you just have to. Your punishment is extended, since Noah reminded me that you have contractual agreements so I can't pull you out of your modeling gigs, I'll discuss another form of punishment with your mom, but don't count on seeing Andie or Chuckie for a while."
"I'm sorry." Mackenzie nodded.
"So many things could have went wrong Mack, Carter could have been seriously hurt from any of the side effects of my pills, he has medicinal allergies, he could have overdosed, anything could have happened. You can't keep stuff like this from us, you just can't." Santana continued. "I'm so disappointed in you, Mack." She whispered.
Mackenzie heard the word disappointed and couldn't control the tears that began to streamed out of eyes faster. "I love you so much, Mackenzie, but you've let me down, sweetheart, all this lying and sneaking around could have turned into a very bad situation, what if your mom and I were out of town, or gone for the night? We have to know things with you all, we have to so we can make sure you all have the proper help you need."
"I'm really sorry." Mackenzie sighed.
"I know." Santana nodded, kissing her on the forehead. "Get ready for school." She stared at Mackenzie before getting out of bed and walking towards the door, with her hand on the doorknob she turned back around. "Thanks for taking care of Carter for this long." She smiled. "You are an amazing sister to your brothers, and even if they don't say it often, they appreciate it."
Mackenzie nodded. "I know."
2pm
Santana signed a few more autographs while smiling for pictures after stepping out of the passenger side of Brittany's white Lamborghini, she glanced at Brittany, who was busy signing autographs herself and chatting with some fans on her side of the car as the valet hopped in and drove off. After the crowd settled down Brittany walked over and grabbed Santana's hand, posing for a few more pictures before they waved to the crowd and walked into the restaurant. They were immediately directed to the private booth in the back where Mercedes and Quinn were sipping on drinks and waiting for them.
"Whoa, look it's Brittana, how nice of you two finally us." Quinn smiled, standing to greet them each with a kiss on the cheek and a hug.
"Sorry we're late." Brittany smiled, sliding in the huge circular booth.
"Be glad we came at all." Santana laughed sliding in next to Brittany.
"Love that dress, girl." Mercedes nodded towards Santana.
"Thanks." Santana smiled, sliding her red leather jacket off her shoulders and carefully lying it on the seat next to her.
"We are just having a light lunch." Quinn rolled her eyes. "You don't have to dress like you're on a runaway."
"My life is a runway." Santana smirked. "I can't help it that I'm so unbelievably gorgeous and stunning that people flock to me, I have to be camera ready at all times."
Brittany laughed, taking a sip of the glass of water on the table in front of her. "We have somewhere to go after this, so that's why San is glammed up."
"So what's new ladies?" Mercedes asked.
"How's Rachel?" Santana asked. "Anyone talk to her lately?"
"I talked to her this morning actually, she's in town." Quinn stated. "She's doing okay, thinking of moving to LA actually."
"Why isn't she out at lunch with us?" Brittany asked as the waiter came around and took their orders.
"I invited her, but she has some business meetings." Quinn clarified. "Noelle and I are going to a play with her tonight."
"Give her our love." Brittany smiled.
"She moving to LA?" Santana asked, reaching for the bottle of champagne and pouring glasses for her and Brittany. "Might as well."
"She doesn't need to run away from her problems, moving across the country won't help her out." Mercedes shook her head, eating some of the shrimp ceviche on the table.
"She can get the hell away from Finn." Santana mumbled. "Don't get me wrong, Finn has been great with our boys, and Brit and I can't even begin to try to repay him for what he's done for them, but as a husband he sucks."
Brittany took a sip of her champagne. "How do we know he sucks?" She asked, looking around the table. "We have no idea what went on in their marriage. And since I don't really like to discuss other people's marriages, especially if they aren't here, so let's move on."
Santana rolled her eyes and scooped some ceviche on Brittany's saucer in front of her. "Brit is a boring gossip in her old age now." Santana teased. "She only wants to talk about facts."
"Whatever." Brittany laughed. "I would just prefer to not gossip about Rachel."
"So what's going on with everyone's kids?" Quinn suggested. "Quinton has a new girlfriend, I hate her."
Mercedes laughed. "What's wrong with her?"
"She's not good enough for Quinton." Quinn shrugged.
"Ok Santana." Mercedes teased.
"Whoa...leave me out of this." Santana laughed. "I love my babies sig others."
"You have only liked Noey, and that's because you think she's your daughter." Mercedes laughed.
"I like Madison." Santana defended herself.
"Are you sure?" Quinn teased.
"Santana just likes to feel people out, that's all."
Santana kissed Brittany gently on the lips. "That you baby, and I agree with Quinn, she's probably not good enough for him."
"You two are so ridiculous." Brittany laughed.
Mercedes leaned on the table. "Well Zacky has lost his damn mind." She snapped. "I caught him in our movie theater with a girl."
Brittany's eyes widened. "Oh my God, there were having sex?"
"No but I'm sure they were well on their way." Mercedes shuddered. "I grabbed that heffa by the hair and pulled her off of him."
"Hell yeah!" Santana high fived her. "So disrespectful."
Quinn shook her head. "Our kids are losing their minds, were we this bad as teenagers?"
"Worse." Brittany deadpanned before laughing with the rest of the group.
"We were a mess in highschool." Quinn laughed, shaking her head as their entrees came out. "Thank you." She smiled at the waitress.
Santana cut a piece of her salmon and slid it to Brittany's plate. "But we are all super flawless and successful right now, so it worked out, and it'll work out for our kids too."
Mercedes nodded. "We have some good kids, so I'm not worried at all."
"Carter had a panic attack last night." Santana stated casually, eating a forkful of her wild rice.
Mercedes and Quinn both stared between her and Brittany before Mercedes finally spoke after a few minutes. "Is he okay?"
Brittany nodded, eating another piece of her chicken. "He's good, he went to school this morning, I texted him before we got here and he replied with the smiley with the sunglasses on."
"Was this his first one?" Quinn asked, swirling her spinach pasta around her fork.
"Yeah." Santana nodded.
"I'm not surprised." Quinn added. "I've thought Carter has had anxiety since he was little."
Santana dropped her fork. "What?"
Mercedes cleared her throat and continued to eat her steak, glancing up occasionally at Brittany and Santana, noticing how calm Brittany was, and how full of rage Santana was becoming. "Q?"
"Carter has exhibited signs of having anxiety since he was a little guy, you played it off as him being bad and Brittany played it off as him being overactive or hyper." Quinn shrugged.
Brittany set her fork down and stared at Quinn. "You've noticed all these years, how didn't we?"
"She's full of shit." Santana rolled her eyes and reached over to Brittany's plate, grabbing some of her squash. "If we didn't notice, no way in hell would she."
"What makes you say that Quinn?" Brittany asked.
"Carter would be bouncing off the walls some moments, then the next he'd be in Brittany's lap, hugging her tightly, or in Mrs. Pierce's, like clinging to them. He would exhibit classic signs of the start of a panic attack, sweating, he would get really quiet, he would stutter." She began to list.
"So if you knew, why the hell didn't you say anything to us?" Santana challenged.
"Because people can't tell you things about your kids." Quinn shook her head. "You don't listen, you get defensive, and you turn it into an argument, or you flip it and attack our parenting skills, so I've learned to keep my opinions about your kids to myself."
"My babies are perfect." Santana snapped. "And Carter just developed this."
"Well..." Mercedes chimed. "Think back, Carter did always kind of freak out around the paps."
Brittany shook her head, "he didn't freak out, he just doesn't like the paps, he really didn't like them as a little boy, and for good reason, they are invasive, rude, intrusive. When San was pregnant with him they hounded her one time when we came out of a doctor's appointment, remember babe?"
Santana took another bite of her salmon. "Hell yeah, it was so fuckin...just ugh."
"Santana! Brittany!"
Santana rolled her eyes behind her shades as Brittany tightened her grip around Santana's waist, her fingers rubbing the side of her seven month stomach.
"Are you okay?" Brittany whispered to her.
"I'm fine." Santana nodded.
"Santana! Over here!"
Santana, who was in a pair of zebra print leggings, a black tanktop, and black flip flops, her hair in a high bun hoping to keep her neck cool from the scorching ninety degree weather, waved at the paps slightly, putting on her best smile.
"Watch your step." Brittany stated, pulling her keys out of her purse and helping Santana down the three steps. "Okay in there baby boy?" She asked the baby bump with a smile.
"He's kicking so he's fine." Santana smiled as a few paps ran closer to them.
"Back up please." Brittany stated sternly as they made their way to her car. "Back up!" She said more forcefully when a pap jumped in front of them and began taking pictures of Santana.
"Brit, stop." Santana stopped walking and grabbed her stomach. "Please stop filming and taking pictures." She whispered.
"Sanny?"
Santana suddenly leaned to the side and emptied her stomach, right on a paps shoes. "Fuck." She groaned as she began to vomit again.
Brittany opened the bottle of the water in Santana's hand and offered her a few sips before pouring some in her hand and rubbing the back of her neck with it.
"Dammit! Back up and give her some privacy." Brittany yelled as Santana leaned into her, she pulled out her phone and dialed 911. "I'm calling the cops then." She hissed, which caused the paps to quickly scatter.
Santana turned in Brittany's arms, allowing Brittany to rub her back with one hand, her stomach with the other. "He's a little shit already." Santana laughed quietly before taking the water bottle and swishing the water around her mouth, spitting it out to the side.
"Well he hates the paps." Brittany smiled. "Are you sure you're okay?"
"Yeah, let's go get the boys from Hannah's house, Noah keeps calling anyways." Santana smiled.
"He's just never liked the paps." Brittany shrugged.
Quinn took another bite and set her fork down. "I know it's hard to swallow, and no one is saying you two are bad mothers for missing this, but Carter has clearly had anxiety problems since he was a kid, maybe his outlet was to run around and play, or his outlet was when he terrorized Mackenzie, or when he did karate."
"How the hell did we miss this?" Santana asked, glancing up at Brittany.
"You two are busy, well we are, we all raised our kids in Hollywood, we are working parents, we have all missed some things with our kids." Mercedes assured them. "You both are A list celebrities, you both are constantly working, you travel a lot, with your kids, a lot happened with Mr. Pierce dying, then Brittany's lupus, San, babe, your anxiety trouble, it's not that you neglected your kids at all, you were living life, doing the best you can, and no one, no one at all can fault you for that."
"Raising kids in Hollywood isn't easy at all." Brittany agreed.
"I can imagine, I don't have the same flock of paps following me, I'm not a celebrity, I can walk down the street with no problem, I was able to take my kids to the movies and out for ice cream with a hassle." Quinn added. "I can only imagine the stress you all are constantly under from your careers."
"You can walk down the street, trip, fall down, have your ice cream smashed in your face and no one will care or post it." Brittany mumbled.
Santana smiled, recalling the pap pictures of Brittany falling on her ice cream cone when she was out with Mackenzie with the little blonde was only three years old. "So since you claim we don't listen to anyone when it comes to our kids, what should we do?"
"Talk to Carter." Mercedes suggested. "And by that I mean, Santana, spend some time with him, just you two, you have anxiety in common maybe he'll open up to you and let you know what caused the attack, what was he thinking or going through."
Quinn noticed how quiet Santana suddenly got and decided to change the subject. "So I'm officially back to work full time, Fabray realty has suffered enough with me."
Santana took a sip of her champagne and smiled brightly. "Good for you, Q, now you can stop calling me all damn day because you're bored." She teased. "Seriously, that's good babe your real estate company has been your baby."
"You were working overseas, weren't you?" Brittany asked.
"Yes, but I love working in LA, seeing all these beautiful homes, making magic with people when they sign the papers and I hand over keys." Quinn beamed.
"And more celebrities to work with." Mercedes laughed.
"Of course, I'm not as rich as you three bitches." Quinn smiled.
Midnight
Santana carried a tray of junk food into the bedroom, smiling at Brittany, who was curled in her favorite blanket, a book in her hand.
"I got some snacks." Santana smiled happily, kicking the door closed, and quickly making her way to the bed, she set the tray down and kissed Brittany on the forehead. Brittany lifted her head and caught her lips, winking at her wife before focusing on the tray of junk.
Santana went to the balcony and opened the sliding doors wide. "It's so nice out tonight, not too hot."
"Today was gorgeous weather wise, but then again we live in LA, so the weather is almost always perfect." Brittany laughed, eating a handful of popcorn, she stared at Santana as she began to strip down, she watched the muscles in her back flex and move as she took her sweatshirt off. "What's that mark on your back?" Brittany frowned. "Come here, Sanny."
Santana took her shorts off so she was now just in her red boy shorts, she looked over her shoulder while spinning in a circle as she tried to see her back. "What mark?"
"Okay, Cinderella, stop!" Brittany laughed. "Come here dork."
Santana scrunched up her nose as she laughed and walked over to her wife, sitting in front of her on the bed. Brittany kissed the back of her neck and ran her fingers over the small marks on her back. "I think it's from your bra, throw that one out."
"Okay." Santana nodded as Brittany ran her fingers over her back and kissed the marks.
"Do they hurt?"
"No." Santana shook her head.
"Okay." Brittany replied, she kissed a trail down Santana's back before the Latina finally turned her head to catch her lips. "I want to finish my book, baby, so put a shirt on."
Santana frowned. "I thought we were going to eat junk and gossip."
"I'm not gossiping with you and you don't need your girls out to gossip anyways." Brittany laughed. "I'm going to finish my book, then we can cuddle."
Santana stared at her. "Can I watch you read?"
"If you want." Brittany laughed.
"Cool." Santana jumped up and began to light candles in the room, Brittany staring at her the entire time, once again admiring her wife's body before Santana came back to the bed and sat crossed legged on the bed, staring at Brittany. "Can I have a kiss?"
Brittany laughed and closed her book. "Yes."
Santana leaned forward and kissed Brittany sweetly on the lips before leaning back and staring at the tray of junk, deciding on the white chocolate pretzels. "Are you going to read out loud?"
"No." Brittany smiled. "Why don't we talk and I can finish my book while you are snoring tomorrow morning? Or on the plane with Mack when we head to Miami."
"Okay." Santana nodded happily, picking up a grape and holding it to Brittany's mouth. "Did you notice Quinn didn't have her wedding band on? Only the engagement ring?"
"No, and I told you I don't want to gossip." Brittany shook her head.
"Seriously, do you think her and Puck are okay?" Santana asked, crunching on a pretzel and shimmying while she ate it.
Brittany stared at her chest and laughed. "We are not gossiping, and you throwing my pillows around won't distract me."
"Come on B, gossip with me." Santana pouted. "So I heard on TMZ that..."
"No." Brittany laughed. "I don't like talking about our friends marriages, you know that."
"Fine, let's talk about our marriage."
Brittany raised an eyebrow. "Okay."
"I'm going to miss you tomorrow." Santana said softly.
Brittany scooted closer and smiled. "I'm going to miss you too, baby, sure you don't want to come?"
Santana shook her head. "Positive, I really want to stay here now because I want to make sure Carter is okay."
Brittany stared at Santana, watching her chew on her bottom lip. "What are you thinking about?"
"Carter."
"Do you want me to stay?" Brittany asked, rubbing Santana's legs. "Noah can go with Mackenzie."
Santana shook her head. "That's not fair to Noah, Madison, Peyton, Nicholas, or Mackenzie; I'll stay with the boys, go with Mack, I want you to talk to her and I'll talk to carter, we can do a little role reversal since we would usually have it switched."
"Report back to one another over FaceTime?" Brittany suggested, holding a pretzel to Santana's mouth.
Santana nodded while chewing the pretzel as she held up her pinky finger, to which Brittany immediately latched on and kissed their fingers. Santana tapped her lips, smirking when Brittany leaned forward and kissed them, her breath then hitched when Brittany kissed south and placed wet kisses on her breasts before popping a grape in her mouth.
"Mercedes has lost some weight." Santana noted. "She looks good."
"Yes she does, she was glowing today." Brittany smiled.
"Can we gossip about Cedes?"
"No." Brittany laughed. "What is wrong with you?"
Santana shrugged. "You think Cedes isn't up cackling about us right now?"
"No I don't and if she is, I prefer to think she isn't." Brittany added.
"I was on TMZ earlier and..." Santana stated so Brittany leaned forward and kissed her.
Santana moaned into the kiss, palming her breasts and teasing her nipples with her fingers. She grabbed Brittany by the back of the head and pulled her closer, deepening the kiss. Brittany broke the kiss and hopped off the bed, she moved the tray to the chest in the corner of the room and walked back to the bed, crawling on Santana as she kissed.
"Less gossiping and more kissing." She told the Latina, who nodded. "I'm in control tonight." Brittany then stated with a smile.
"I want you to be." Santana rasped as Brittany settled between her legs and hovered over her, smiling down at her softly.
Brittany teased her tongue along the Latina's bottom lip before sucking it into her mouth. "I love you." She mumbled before kissing Santana deeply. Santana arched her back when she felt Brittany cup her core.
"That dirty bastard." Santana shook her head, staring at the TV, she was reclined back on their new sectional in the family room, a bowl of popcorn in her lap, and a tall glass of iced tea in the cup holder. "Wait! Don't! Don't open the door!" She screamed at the TV. "Look at those letters, shit I bet they are love letters from Malcolm's charming ass."
Brittany walked in the house through the kitchen, she stopped to take a few vitamins, when she heard Santana yelling and walked towards the family room.
"Like why?!" Santana groaned, grabbing a tissue to wipe her tears. "Damn eyes are leaking now, you could have had it all Helen, don't fall back into Malcolm's lies, he doesn't love you girl!"
Brittany chuckled softly and went back to the kitchen, she chugged her bottle of water, putting it in the recycle before walking back in the family room and staring at her wife.
"Why Helen?! Of all the damn places you go there, I don't want to call you stupid...but I have no choice." Santana shook her head while sighing.
"You are so cute when you watch TV." Brittany smiled, startling the Latina, who jumped and wasted the popcorn on the couch.
"Fuck, Brit." She laughed.
"Who's Helen and why are you so upset at her?" Brittany asked, helping her clean up the popcorn before kissing her on the temple. and sitting down next to her.
"Oh...just a movie, it's not even that good." Santana shrugged nonchalantly, quickly turning the movie off.
"Are you watching LifeTime?" Brittany asked with a smirk.
"No!"
"Yes you are." Brittany laughed. "Didn't you just spend an hour teasing Quinn about watching those movies the other day."
"No!"
"Give me the remote." Brittany reached for the remote but Santana picked it up and tossed it in her shirt. "You know that's my favorite spot to look for things, right?" She laughed and stuck her hand down Santana's shirt.
"Brit, stop." Santana laughed as Brittany leaned her back and began to tickle her, she wrapped her legs around her wife's waist, holding Brittany in place while wiggling the top half of her body, holding her chest tightly where she stashed the remote in her bra.
Brittany began to kiss down her neck, immediately finding Santana's spot, causing her body to grow limp and submissive to Brittany. "Mmmmmmm." Santana hummed when Brittany caught her lips and pushed her tongue in her mouth. Brittany then grabbed the remote and jumped up to turn the TV on. "The fuck?" Santana jumped up and tried to tackle Brittany on the couch but it was too late.
"You're watching a movie called The Grace of Helen?" Brittany laughed loudly. "My poor Snixx, what happened to you?" She teased.
"Shut up!" Santana said softly clearing her throat.
"Are you crying from the movie?" Brittany then noticed the pile of tissues and screamed loudly while laughing. "Where is my phone to call Cedes?!"
"Don't you dare!" Santana shook her head and laughed, flopping back on the couch to once again pick up the popcorn they spilled.
"When you're done with Helen and her grace...can you help me get the groceries out of the car, you know if you're tears stop long enough." Brittany laughed and jumped out of the way of the handful of popcorn Santana threw at her as she ran out of the family room.
"Go to hell Brit." Santana laughed.
"Of course, I need my Snixx fix in the afterlife." She winked and ran out of the room.
Santana stared in the direction Brittany ran, once she heard the door to the garage open and close, she got comfortable again and turned the TV back up. "Shit...what did I miss? Oh my God! Did Helen just die?" She shrieked, her eyes widening at the screen, until Helen came back into view and she let out a sigh of relief, her hand on her chest. "Thank God!" She shook her head, and stuck another handful of popcorn her mouth. "Had me scared girl."
"San!" Brittany yelled out. "Come help me!"
"Dammit, til we meet again Helen, stay safe hun." Santana waved at the TV before turning it back off. "Brittany makes me miss all the good movies, I hope she got my ice cream at least." She grumbled as she made her way through the kitchen to the garage.
Brittany stood at the grill, dancing to the music as she flipped over the boneless chicken breast and burgers; she had on a pair of small white cargo shorts, an Oreo cookie tshirt, and a white cap on her head. Santana walked out in a black sundress, carrying vegetables she cut up to grill when Nicholas came running over with Aubrey, Hannah's now six year old daughter, who was a splitting image of her mother having blonde hair and blue eyes, unlike her siblings who had red hair.
"Aunt Sanny?" Aubrey said quietly, playing with the hem of her shirt, still extremely shy.
"Yes, Bree?" Santana smiled, handing Brittany the tray. "Are those ready B?" She asked Brittany pointing to the hotdogs, Brittany shook her head no, and continued to dance to the music.
"Aunt Sanny?" Aubrey repeated a little louder.
"Yes, sweetheart, I'm listening." Santana smiled and kneeled down to her.
"C-c-c-c-an we, can we, can we go..." She began to stutter, which was happening a lot lately, so Santana patiently waited, Brittany glanced down at Aubrey and smiled at her, when the little blonde's eyes flickered up to her.
Nicholas glared at her and groaned. "Her talk too slow!" He snapped. "Can we have cheese on our hotdogs."
"Nicholas." Brittany said sternly.
"Nick, what did we say about that?" Santana shook her head. "Give Bree a chance to get her sentence out."
"Her talk too slow."
"No she doesn't." Santana shook her head, glancing at Aubrey, who was now a soft shade of red. She reached her hand out to her niece and pulled her into a hug when she walked between her legs.
"Yes, you can Nicholas." Brittany nodded.
"Thanks BB!" He smiled before running back towards Carter, who was throwing nerf balls at him.
"Ask your question, Bree." Santana smiled at her.
Aubrey leaned into Santana's embrace and shook her head. "No thank you."
"I really want to hear it." Santana smiled.
Aubrey glanced up at her, Santana being her favorite aunt of the three she had, and blushed. "Can we, can, c-c-can w-we."
"Take a big deep breath." Santana told her softly, rubbing her back.
Aubrey nodded and did as Santana told her. "Can we can have cheese on our hotdogs?"
"Of course you can, you can have whatever you want." Santana winked at her, Aubrey smiled brightly and ran happily back over to Danielle and Mackenzie., who were playing a board game with Mrs. Pierce at the picnic table.
"She's getting worse." Brittany noted.
"Did Hannah start speech therapy with her?" Santana asked, lifting Brittany's beer and taking a sip.
"I don't know, I'll ask her a little later, I'm sure Nicholas didn't help the situation." Brittany rolled her eyes with a smile.
"Lita!" Peyton screamed as she sprinted right into Santana's leg, and hugged it tightly.
"There she is!" Santana beamed, picking up her granddaughter and kissing all over her face, before leaning her over to Brittany who did the same.
"How'd you get here?" Brittany asked. "Magic?"
"No my mommy." Peyton smiled.
"Hey, do you need any help?" Madison asked, walking over in a long purple dress, her baby bump on full display.
"Bump alert!" Santana smiled happily as she handed Peyton to Brittany who began making funny faces with her and hugged Madison, "can I?" She asked, her hands hovering over Madison's stomach.
"Of course." Madison laughed as Brittany kissed her on the cheek.
"You look great honey." Brittany smiled at her, before turning back to the grill., letting Peyton help her turn the hotdogs.
"Hey little Lopez-Pierce." Santana smiled while rubbing Madison's stomach. "I can't wait until you get here so I can bite those chubby cheeks and thighs." She laughed. "How are you feeling?" She then asked Madison standing back up, one hand still on her stomach.
"Good, Noah is a godsend during nausea, and Peyton is super helpful, having the night off of cooking is perfect, so thank you for inviting us over." She added.
"Well, Brit and Mack are going to Miami for the weekend so I wanted to get everyone together." Santana smiled. "Go have a seat, are you hungry right now, want some fruit?"
"That would be good." Madison smiled, "thank you."
"BB!" Nicholas yelled from across the yard. "Watch this!"
Brittany looked up just as Nicholas did a backflip and a series of cartwheels, her eyes widened as she clapped loudly and whistled. "Good job!"
They spent the remainder of the night hanging around the yard, Santana and Brittany enjoying having all of their kids over, Mrs. Pierce loving every moment with her grandchildren and great grandchildren.
"So Santana, you mean to tell me that you and Brittany aren't getting a divorce and dragging the kids into court?" Ellen laughed, staring at her friend across the stage.
Santana rolled her eyes. "Gross, the media is driving me crazy this year!" She laughed. "Brittany and I are stronger than ever, she is my one true love and I've known that since I was sixteen, we are never getting a divorce, and TMZ can kiss my ass." She added.
"Well, as always thank you for stopping by and hanging out with us as always here on the Ellen show." Ellen beamed. "But before you go, I want a song."
"I didn't come to perform." Santana laughed.
"Who cares, we want a song, right?" Ellen stood and clapped with the audience.
Santana blushed, turning bright red, before standing. "Fine, fine, fine!" She laughed as the audience cheered loudly, and she made her way over to the piano to the side. "You owe me like one whole dollar for this performance." She teased Ellen as she sat down and began to play a few random notes. "Okay, so this song is one I've been working on with Noah, who is my amazingly talented son, who just so happens to be one of the top songwriters and producers in the industry right now, you all saw him win those three Grammy's this year, right?" She bragged as she continued to play. "I'm going to need some help with this song, I wasn't prepared to sing." She laughed as she started the melody of the song.
Bum bum bum bum
bum bum bum bum
You're beautiful,
Sometimes you feel insecure,
trust me babe I understand,
Even with no manicure,
just know that I'll still hold you hand.
Brittany then walked out on stage a microphone in her hand and sang the next part with Santana, sending the audience crazy.
Yeah listen, Brittany stated first, before the two sang together.
You look so good when you walking by,
Sexy comes in every size, keep wearing that
You aint playing. Santana adlibbed, smiling brightly at Brittany when she leaned against the piano.
Noah then walked out with a microphone and sang the next part with a big smile.
You got yourself a new man,
don't need no workout plan
I call that baby fat
Baby Fat Santana and Brittany repeated while laughing as Noah kissed Brittany on the cheek and sat down next to Santana on the piano, smoothly taking over playing for her before he sang again,
Cause you sure look good to me.
Santana stood up next to Brittany, wrapping her arm around her waist and they sang the chorus together with Noah, as Mackenzie and Ashton walked out with microphones, singing adlibs.
You're so beautiful (shake it, shake it)
Give the world a show (move it, move it)
Go up down, up down, up down
Go up down, up down, up down
Shake it fast, go head go head,
It's yours,
You better wait for it
Brittany began to shake her butt as Santana playfully patted it with a big smile, winking at her kids, Mackenzie dancing herself with Brittany as Santana, Ashton, and Noah sang the chorus again.
You're so beautiful (shake it, shake it)
So one, two, three let's go (move it, move it)
Go up down, up down, up down
Go up down, up down, up down
Shake it fast, go head go head
it's yours, You better wait for it
Carter then walked out with a microphone as Noah played a small piano solo, dancing his way to his family while he began to rap, Santana harmonizing with him, saying certain words.
You're so pretty with you fine ass,
beautiful curves, looking like a wine glass
Hit me so hard something like a bypass
You could go first I could get you high class
I love girls, girls, girls, girls, girls,
Ashton then chimed in singing
I do adore.
Carter fist bumped his brother and leaned on the piano between his mothers as he began to trade bars rapping with Ashton, who harmonized with him.
I love em around the world, world, world
Girl you perfect underneath the surface
You got the smile like the sunshine
You keep it sexy, your shoes are Giuseppe
and hot damn it
you got me tongue tied
Brittany and Santana smiled proudly watching their kids as Mackenzie danced to the side, mesmerizing the crowd.
Good girl with a bad side
Ima dog we could get into a cat fight
If you act right, I could hit your back
Make you wanna kill the kitty like the cat died
Santana then began to sing while the rest of the family clapped for her singing various adlibs.
You're so beautiful (shake it, shake it)
Give the world a show (move it, move it)
Go up down, up down, up down
Go up down, up down, up down
Shake it fast, go head go head,
Go head, go head, It's yours
You're so beautiful (shake it, shake it)
So one, two, three let's go (move it, move it)
Go up down, up down, up down
Go up down, up down, up down
Shake it fast, go head go head
Santana and Noah became to harmonize and adlib the rest of the song while Mackenzie and Ashton clapped along with the audience and Carter worked the audience, kissing a few ladies on the cheek and dancing with others before going back on stage where the entire family sang the last line.
You're so beautiful.
"The Lopez-Pierce family!" Ellen screamed as the family hugged and took a bow while praising each other for the performance.
8pm Miami
"Mackenzie, do you mind if I just order room service for us?" Brittany asked her daughter, walking across the suite to her bedroom.
Mackenzie walked out in a pair of baggy sweats, and a tight tank top. "Sure."
"I was hoping we could talk a little." Brittany suggested with a smile. "I already ordered."
"So I didn't have a choice?" Mackenzie laughed.
"Nope." Brittany winked at her, sitting down on the couch, she patted the space next to her, inviting Mackenzie to join her.
Mackenzie sat on the couch, facing her mother, waiting for her to start talking.
"You look so much like when I was in highschool, remember the pictures I showed you?" Brittany smiled.
"You were super pretty in highschool, so was mommy." Mackenzie nodded.
"Thank you." Brittany blushed. "What's going on up here?" She asked her tapping the side of her head. "What's the issue with eating?"
"I don't have an eating disorder, I've gotten all the pamphlets that mommy has let all over my room, in my backpack, in my gym bag, taped around my toothpaste, and around my shampoo. How long did it take her to laminate those?" Mackenzie asked with a small smile.
Brittany smiled. "Sometimes I think your mom has more than twenty four hours in her day, she gets a lot done, a lot for you kids, a lot for me, she pushes herself to the limit daily for us, because she loves us. Do you know why those pamphlets are so outdated?"
Mackenzie shook her head. "I thought she made them herself."
"No, those are the same ones I gave her from our guidance counselor, Ms. Pillsbury when we were in highschool." Brittany stated carefully.
"Mommy had an eating disorder?"
"Yes." Brittany nodded. "I didn't know what to do, she denied it constantly, so I went to the guidance counselor and got all these pamphlets, I left them all her for her, hoping she would read them, I would watch her eat sometimes, and cover my ears when she throw it back up, until enough became enough and I finally sat down and talked to her."
"I promise I don't have one." Mackenzie shook her head.
"So why aren't you eating like you normally do?" Brittany asked.
"I just wanted my body to be perfect for this photoshoot."
"Mackenzie, baby, your body is perfect now, sweetheart, and yeah, I'm your mom and you expect me to say stuff like that, but I mean it, you're thirteen years old, I know you want bigger boobs, and a super thin waist, but you have to let your body fully develop and grow. Starving yourself, or cutting off certain foods drastically isn't the way to do it, you're causing more harm than good. You see the slight dark circles under your eyes, you're missing out on nutrients baby."
Mackenzie looked down, remembering when she first noticed them and bought some concealer to hide it from her mothers.
"If you want to be healthy and maintain your current size, that's great, we can work out more together, and your mom and I can get you a nutritionist that can suggest some things for you, but you have to eat." Brittany told her.
"I'm sorry." Mackenzie replied.
"We've been hearing that word from you a lot lately, when are you really going to mean it and take some action, Mack?" Brittany asked. "I know being a teenager is rough, and you are in the spotlight, which probably adds stress but don't lose sight of yourself, you started your menstrual cycle, you're going to gain some weight, baby, your body is growing up, your hips are going to spread a little, but that's natural."
"Highschool isn't what I thought it would be, some of those look like grown women or super models." Mackenzie sighed.
Brittany took her shirt off, so she was just in her bra, she pinched her side. "10 years ago, I had rock solid abs, it was your moms favorite part of my body, now look at my stomach." She smiled.
"You're still super skinny momma." Mackenzie frowned.
"I've gained twenty five pounds since being diagnosed with lupus." Brittany told her. "I freaked out initially, I'm not able to exercise the way I used to, the medication I take daily added some weigh, I have to drink the protein shakes, which made me gain weight, but the important part is I'm healthy."
Mackenzie smiled. "Did momma notice your weight gain?"
"Of course." Brittany smiled. "When I first started to gain the weight, she would assure me I was just as beautiful and perfect to her as when we were teenagers, she said now there's more of me to love." Brittany exhaled. "Mackenzie, you're beautiful, and while yeah everyone wants to beautiful outside, what really counts is being beautiful in here." She tapped her heart and her head. "And if you continue with this obsession with your body for photoshoots, I will buy out your contracts and shut down the whole thing, am I clear?"
Mackenzie nodded quickly, swallowing thickly, since she didn't expect that from Brittany, who hugged her tightly.
"Now I ordered burgers and fries, and a milkshake." Brittany smiled. "Are we going to enjoy them together and you can dish on the boys you like so far in highschool or do I need to worry?"
"We can totally dish." Mackenzie smiled. "Have you noticed how Chuckie is?" She asked with a big smile.
"He's very cute." Brittany laughed.
Santana knocked and walked in Carter's room. "Hey, can we talk?"
Carter nodded with a shrug. "Come in your highness." He smiled.
Santana laughed and walked in sitting on the edge of his bed, staring at the bright orange, yellow, and red socks he had on pulled up to his knees. "So this is what you spend your money on? Bright socks?" She teased.
"Nope, this is what I spend your money on, I save my money for shoes." He laughed.
"Fair enough." Santana rolled her eyes with a smile.
"You have anxiety, Carter, you've probably always had it, and your mom and I didn't pick up on it, and we're sorry for that, really, really sorry for that." Santana stated. "I know we travel a lot for you work, we did a whole lot when you all were younger, and we should have been home more, I know that, but we work as hard as we did because we wanted to give you four a life we didn't have growing up. That means that sometimes we neglected some parental duties, we missed some little cues that would have helped us. We butt hears a lot, we are so much alike that I can't deal with it sometimes, and I dropped the ball a lot with you because of that."
Carter stared at her but remained silent.
"C, I love you, I know I scream and yell, but I want us to work on having a better relationship and I think we can bond over your anxiety, but you have to talk to me." Santana told him.
He stared at her but remained silent, after several minutes Santana sighed and stood up to leave the room. "I didn't know that Mackenzie was giving me your pills, she told me they were aspirin, she said momma tells you it's aspirin sometimes."
Santana sat back down. "When your mom says it's aspirin it's just a little game we play, I know she's giving me my pills, but in my mind if she says aspirin then I don't feel as helpless and bad when I take them."
"Oh."
"Carter what happened before the attack, do you remember or do you know what's stressing you out?" Santana asked.
"I honestly don't. I took a shower, and I was reading a car magazine getting ideas on how to sup up my car when my chest got tight, and I couldnt' catch my breathe, and the next thing I remember was Mackenzie screaming." He shook his head, running his hands through his hair. "I just know that when I do sports, I'm fine, or when I'm with Noah working on music or whatever I'm fine, but doing everything else my mind is racing, and it annoys me, I can't focus."
Santana nodded. "I get like that too, so my voice calms you down? Like my songs?"
Carter nodded shyly. "It relaxes me, and Mack is like always playing your music in her room, so that's why I go to her room."
"Why didn't you come to us?"
"Because, I...I knew that if I did, it would make this real." He groaned. "I don't want to have anxiety or have to take pills or feel like my damn head is going to explode throughout the damn day!" He yelled, jumping out of his bed. "Its annoying, I can't concentrate at school, or on anything because I can't turn my mind off." He yelled loudly and knocked over the hamper in his room, before throwing all the paper off of the desk, along with some books, he then grabbed the water bottle in his room and threw it at the wall. Santana stood up and took a deep breath before walking over and grabbing him as he looked for more things to throw, she hugged him tightly, resting her head on his back.
"I got you Carter." She sighed against his back when she felt him start to shake as he tried to keep his tears in. "It's rough, anxiety sucks, it can consume you, trust me I know, baby. I'm sorry you got this from me, so sorry., Please let me help you, baby. I suffered with my anxiety for longer than I needed to alone, I was scared, I didn't want to admit it but..."
Carter sniffled and shook his head, moving out of Santana's arms. "I'm fine."
"No you're not." Santana said with tears in her eyes. "I told myself I was fine too, but I wasn't. Please let me help you."
She stared up at her son, her heart breaking at his red eyes, and the way his top lip was slightly quivering, trying his hardest to keep his macho facade.
"Can we go for a run?" He asked her.
"Yes." She nodded quickly, wiping her tears. "Does that help?"
"Yeah."
"Okay, give me ten minutes to change." Santana told him. "Wait right here, and I promise to come right back and we can run all night if you want."
Carter sat on his bed, his head in his hands. "Okay."
Santana swallowed slowly and kissed the top of his head before turning and running out of the room, she sprinted up to her room, quickly changing into a pair of Spandex pants and a tshirt, she ran through the closet and grabbed her running sneakers, slipping them on, and ran back to Carter's room, where he was tying his shoes.
"Ready?" She asked him.
"Yeah." Carter nodded and followed her out of the room.
Mackenzie laughed, covering her mouth when she snorted, which made Brittany laugh louder. "Okay so I don't love Justin Bieber but I really like him."
"That's better, I think the word love is thrown around so much." Brittany smiled.
"So what's love, you and mommy are always kissing and stuff, that's love right?" Mackenzie asked, grabbing another handful of M&Ms from the bowl tossing them in her mouth, which made Brittany smile.
"Love is when I tell your mom not to wear six inch stilettos when we'll be on our feet all day, and she does anyways, so I switch shoes with her so it doesn't show how much her feet are hurting. Love is when even though I'm freezing I take my jacket off and wrap it around her shoulders the moment I see her shiver." Brittany smiled at Mackenzie softly, her eyes twinkling. "Love is when your mom feeds me the last piece of cheesecake even though she really, really wants it. Love is when she lets me put my freezing feet between her legs to warm them up." Mackenzie blushed and laughed softly at how giddy Brittany was. "Love is how my heart still flutters, after over thirty years with a simple forehead kiss from Santana."
Mackenzie smiled at Brittany, watching her get lost in her own headspace.
"Love is rushing to open to my eyes in the morning to see her face, and seeing her face as the last image before I close my eyes at night. I love your mom so much." Brittany smiled at Mackenzie again. "It's breakfast in bed, late night cuddles, celebrating you guys achievements and watching you four grow up." Brittany sighed. "It's hard to explain exactly...it's how I crave your mom's touch," she glanced at Mackenzie, who scowled and laughed. "Hugs, Mack, I love hugs from your mom, how I get butterflies by just thinking about her smile...love is marrying your best friend, who loves you unconditionally in spite of your faults and makes you want to be a better, not for them, but for yourself, and that's what I did." She finished. "One day, you're going to find a magical love story of your own to tell your daughter, who will roll her eyes and scowl too." She laughed.
"You and mom are so in love." Mackenzie teased. "She stares at you all the time, and you stare at her all the time."
Brittany blushed. "I love her so much."
Mackenzie stuck out her tongue at her mother before clasping her hands together and holding them up by her head, she began to bat her eyes. "I love you Sanny!" She teased her mother before falling over laughing.
Brittany's jaw dropped as she began to laugh. "You are in so much trouble."
Mackenzie jumped up and ran when she saw Brittany pick up a pillow to hit her with. Brittany chased the younger blonde around the living room portion of their suite find able to hit her with the pillow, Mackenzie sunk to the floor as Brittany attacked her and threw the pillow to the side and began tickling her instead, just as her phone rang.
"Saved by your mom, like always." Brittany laughed when she heard Santana's ringtone.
"Yes!" Mackenzie smiled.
Even across the country you find a way to save Mackey. Brittany laughed.
Santana?
Calm down baby, take a deep breath, I can't understanding what you're saying.
Thoughts?
