Damon rested back silently against Addie with his face nuzzled in the warm, safe crook where her neck and shoulder met for what to he guessed to be about two hours. He managed to hold back all but two more tears. It was soothing; one hand stroking at his hair and the other at his chest. At some point she had flicked open the top two buttons of his shirt. The soft tracing of her nails around his heart made it beat harder, faster. The situation was too nice, too comfortable to last. It didn't make sense. He shouldn't feel so at peace with Addie when she was causing him such internal turmoil. Damon had always been happy being a vampire before; how could this girl have him missing being human? He had no idea who he truly was when he was mortal. It wasn't until he found the strength and power that came with being a vampire that Damon had discovered what he was really like.

Addie was taken by surprise when Damon abruptly pulled away from her and flung himself onto his stomach and buried his face into his crossed arms. She raked her hand through her hair, trying to figure out what to say. She wanted to make a witty remark about how Damon was better as a vampire or pointing out how miserable being a human was but Addie didn't that would go over very well with Damon. Unfortunately, last time she checked, she hadn't read What to do When Your Vampire Breaks or seen any copies of Chicken Soup for the Lost Vampire's Soul. Every way Damon ever portrayed himself made it seem like he not only enjoyed being a vampire; he embraced it more than he ever had being human.

Deciding to go with action rather than words, she decided to do what relaxed her. Addie straddled Damon's back and rested her weight on her knees and his backside.

"What are you doooo…," Damon trailed off and into a groan as the heels of Addie's hands firmly pressed into the muscles outlining his scapulas.

Thumbs rubbed in firm circles on either side of his spine as she started at the base and worked her way to his neck. Her fingers dug into his scrunched up shoulders, encouraging him to widen and relax his arms. His partially open shirt let her pull his collar away from the bottom of his neck and she pressed a soft kiss to the side. "You're tense," Addie noted in a whisper, sitting back and continuing to massage his back.

Damon laughed bitterly, his face still covered by his arms. His voice cracked when she found a knot between his shoulder blade and neck, "You're not wrong." He let her work at his stiff muscles before reaching back and grabbing her hands, tugging her down against him. When her face was next to his, he pressed a kiss against a her cheek. Damon let his lips linger at the corner of his mouth as he praised, "That was great. Thank you." His arms went back to cushion his forehead as he faced the ground.

Addie threw her leg back to the other side and got off of him before she laid perpendicular to Damon, using his back as a pillow. The gentle breeze blew the willowing branches of the tree over them in a hypnotizing motion. It was Damon becoming restless and repetitively pushing at the ground with the toe of one shoe, making himself shift up and down slightly that broke Addie from her reverie.

Time didn't seem to have passed in quantifiable measures but the movement of the sun had indicated she'd been in a trace for awhile. She still didn't know what to say to him, even less now that he was… well, she wasn't quite sure what the turning onto his stomach and covering his face had indicated. Maybe if she could just distract him from his despair of missing being human long enough he would break out of his silence and give her some indication of what to do. But what would be strong enough to distract him?

The iPod she constantly carried in her pocket suddenly felt like a lead weight. Sharing her music with him wasn't necessarily a good idea. It was such a private and personal thing that she wasn't sure she wanted Damon to see that side of her; to be that vulnerable with him. Though he had really opened up with her and she felt obligated to do the same with him. Hesitantly she began to pull at the music player when her other pocket began to vibrate. Addie pulled out her cellphone, intending to just silence it when Damon spoke.

"You should answer it. The Scooby-doo Gang has probably figured out you're not at school by now. It wouldn't do for them to think you've gone missing," he muttered, his voice muffled from looking towards the ground.

Irritation filled Addie when she read the caller ID. Of course her sister would interrupt her time with Damon. "I hate when you're right," she mumbled before answering the call. "What can I do for you?"

"Where are you?" demanded Elena.

"Lost in the woods," Addie smirked to herself. It wasn't technically a lie; they were in a clearing in the woods and she wouldn't have necessarily been able to find her way home if she had to.

Elena's eye roll was easily imagined and annoyance could be heard in her voice, "How are you lost in the woods?"

"Well, I was up early this morning so I decided to go for a run and well, I ended up lost in the woods." It still wasn't a lie; just an omission of the truth.

Elena huffed, "Didn't you pay attention to where you were going?"

She decided to see how far she could go without telling a lie. An indirect answer was a simple solution. "I had a lot on my mind."

"Do I need to ask Stefan or Damon to try and find you?"

"Stefan has class. Damon and I aren't really talking. It's not a big deal, Elena. I'm a big girl. I'm sure I'll find my way back home before I get eaten by a bear," placated Addie sarcastically.

"Everything isn't a joke, Addie," scolded Elena. "You could get hurt. Not to mention you missed school."

School was, for once, the furthest thing from her mind; she felt like she had much bigger problems to deal with at the moment. Addie snorted, "You have no idea how much I needed a mental health day. I will be safe. If something happens or it gets too late, I have a magical device called a cell that lets me call for help. Unfortunately my lame sister is draining the battery, meaning it may be dead in case of an emergency."

The school bell rang in the background and Elena huffed in testily, "Alright, fine. Hey! Before I go, did you run into Uncle John at the house when you left?"

Her brows furrowed and she sat up as she reflected on this new information, "Uncle John is back?"

"Yeah, Stefan reached out to Isobel for help about this whole sun and moon thing but ended up getting John instead, He took it upon himself to invite him here. This morning he dropped it on Jenna that he's my biological father. Oh, the best part? He says he's here to protect me and 'that's all he can say for the moment.'"

"You doubt that? Uncle John hates vampires and you're boyfriend threatened to turn him into one if he didn't leave town. It's odd that he would come back for any other reason, even if said boyfriend did ask for help. Plus, I'm sure Damon wants to kill him for tossing him into the basement with the tomb vampires. Uncle John isn't stupid; he wouldn't come if he didn't have a good reason," Addie rationalized over her sister's huffing and puffing. "We've always had different opinions on him. Don't think that just because I'm supporting you in this deal with Elijah and everything that I suddenly agree with you. We're still the same people, Elena. We don't get along. Seriously, I've put up with your fake niceness for the past few weeks, particularly about Damon, but I'm tired of it. It's not believable when you make snide comments under your breath. If we're going through with this deal or pact or whatever Elijah has planned, we're doing it honestly."

Without giving her sister a chance to respond, Addie hung up the phone and laid back down, surprised when her head landed on Damon's stomach. Glad that he wasn't still burying his face in his arms she turned her head to look at him and smile. His arm was slung over his face, covering his eyes. Her lips changed into a frown; this wasn't exactly much of an improvement.

"I'm guessing you would be upset if I killed Daddy Gilbert?" grumbled Damon.

She closed her eyes in exasperation, enjoying the warmth of the sun on her eyelids. "I'm not upset over one murder but two in as many days might push my limit," scoffed Addie. "Please, Damon, play nice with my uncle."

"So you can work with him to barbecue me again? I don't think so," he growled, running his fingers through her hair, the sun highlighting the red undertones.

The back of her hand smacked lightly against his thigh. "I did change my mind," she reminded him defensively.

"After the room I was in was set on fire."

"Hey!" Addie snapped. "I care about you. I ran into a burning building to save your ass and I don't have any advantages like super speed or strength."

Damon waved a hand dismissively, "Guilty conscience."

She snorted, "Oh, yeah, totally. I had a guilty conscience about killing a serial killing vampire."

He didn't have a response for that so he changed tracks, "Why is John here?"

"To do the same damn thing as everyone else: protect Elena."

"A: That is most definitely not why he's here. B: Someone has to. You're too busy brokering deals with an untrusty Original and agreeing to stupid things. C: You sound pretty damn bitter about people wanting to save your sister's life," Damon listed off flatly, ticking each point off on a finger

Addie shrugged, "A: Why else would he come back to town? You heard me on the phone. He's here to protect his daughter. B: I did not agree to anything; Elena did. All I did was see an opportunity to solve one of our problems about getting Stefan out of the tomb and I went for it. C: People should stop trying before someone gets hurt. Elijah has agreed to keep everyone safe."

"A: He's up to something; John's always up to something. B: That would have been some decent brokering if Elijah could be trusted. C: You are naive if you actually trust that vampire."

"I'm done with A. I'm not going to argue with you about my uncle. He's can be a jerk but he's a good guy. All he has ever done has been to protect my family. Sorry if you don't agree with him for seeing you as a danger. Ignoring B since it is pointless. C: I don't necessarily trust him. On the off chance that we can, though, it seems like a wise idea to have an unkillable ancient vampire with connections on our side. I'm not trying to convince you to feel the same way as I do. You feel however you want, Damon. We're not going to agree about everything," she sighed, not looking for a fight.

He shook his head, running the hand not playing with her hair over his face. Damon knew she was right and usually he would be continue to argue with her over John's intentions and trusting Elijah but he just didn't have the energy. He yielded and backed down, "You're right; we're not."

They lapsed back into a silence. When his hand would grip tighter in her hair, Addie couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking. With his cheek pressed to the ground, she couldn't read his facial expression from resting on his stomach but she was able to tell that his jaw was clenching and unclenching. She couldn't help but wonder if he was reacting to her chat with Elena or his own existential crisis.

"What are you thinking about?"

Damon looked up to the sky and covered his face with both hands, his voice coming out muffled, "You said you're not upset. You should be furious with me."

"I've been thinking about that and I know I should be mad at you for killing someone," Addie mulled over, staring blankly out across the lake, "but I can't find it in me to be upset with you. That probably makes me an awful person, not being angry at the man who committed a cold-blooded murder of an innocent young woman. I know it makes me awful, actually, because I feel disgusted with myself. I knew you came with your flaws and, unfortunately, the fact that you enjoy killing people is one of them. I'm not exactly happy about it but it's not like I can change who you are."

"That's stupid," he said gruffly, his voice blocked by his hands.

Addie closed her eyes and tried not to get frustrated with him. The fact that her temper was shortened due to her suppressing her own anger at herself for not being able to be angry with him. He had ended a young woman's life full of the human possibilities he claimed to miss. Just because he had been denied those things didn't make it acceptable for him to deny others. Not being upset was akin to a stamp of approval! Even when she first read the headline and connected it with Damon Addie didn't feel a flicker of anger towards him. She tried to feel shocked or disappointed by his actions but that meant having expectations of him and she was forced to face that she really didn't have any. Caring for someone who was so intense, reckless, volatile without expectations was dangerous. That she could feel nothing but sad for him was concerning. Addie thought she had a better control over her feelings. If someone had asked her the previous day whether or not she would be mad at him if he murder someone like he had the answer would have been an easy 'yes.' But now, she wasn't sure just how far he'd have to go to make her angry, to disappoint her. More unsettling was the question of what would it take for her to stop caring about him?

She had considered pretending to be angry with him but she she just couldn't rationalize it. Addie sighed and asked Damon the same ones she had asked herself, "What is being mad at you going to accomplish? Are you suddenly going to become a different, more moral guy? Will it bring that girl back to life? Are you going to learn some lesson and not do it again? No; I'm not going to be upset with you when it's going to do anything but make us fight over something that isn't going to change. To be angry with you about who you are would just be stupid. Not being furious with you because I care about you and don't want to pick an argument about something pointless is stupid to you? Why should I bother being with you if I can't accept you? If I'm just going to be continually pissed everytime I think you do something irrationation or that I don't agree with?

"Besides, you killing someone and not completely covering it up here and now just doesn't fit with the agenda you claim to have, which I'm trusting to be true. That makes what you did a bright, reflective, yellow warning sign for something being wrong with you. Why would you risk the Council starting to believe that vampires are back in town? You wouldn't, at least not if you were thinking rationally. However, irrational you tends to make an appearance when you become very upset. Ripping Bonnie's throat out after Emily destroyed the crystal, killing my brother after Katherine admitted to using you and Elena rejected you, killing Alaric after he tried to kill me; it's an exhaustive list of your finest hits. You act unphased, cold, and detached but when you get mad or hurt, you have a tendency towards acting out. It's like the two-year-old throwing a temper tantrum because he can't express how he feels when it's cleanup time," she explained, constantly waiting for him to snap back. Addie knew she was pushing things a little far when she compared him to a toddler.

Damon rubbed at his face to wipe any traces of emotion. He massaged at his temples, feeling a stress induced headache coming on. This wasn't right; she shouldn't be able to read him so well. Addie shouldn't be able to rationalize and understand things about him that it had taken him 70 to 80 years to figure out. Yet, it was his fault that she could; he had invited her to get to know him in deeper ways than he had ever let anyone before. He was the one who kept sharing about himself and his past unprompted. Damon did what he did best and deflected Addie from her real point, "Ric was completely justifiable; that was self defense and revenge for him hurting you. Besides, I'd be furious with you if you killed someone for no good reason."

"I'm not even going to argue how much of a double standard that is because I don't see the point of both of us getting pissed off over a hypothetical," Addie grounded out through gritted teeth. "Typically, when I get upset the only person that gets hurt is myself."

Damon tucked one arm back under his head so he could see her better "Yeah, that makes me even angrier. And," he scowled, picking up her left arm and holding it over her face, "I've notice."

The strip of skin about a centimeter wide and roughly and inch and a half to two inches long that had faded to just a few shades darker than the lightly sun-kissed skin of her inner forearm glared mockingly at her. Addie wrenched her arm out of his gentle hold and sniffed, "That is none of your business."

"You are so good at sharing about yourself," he snipped sarcastically, tucking his other arm behind his head as well.

Addie had to admit that he was right. It couldn't have been easy for someone as guarded as Damon to tell her what he had this morning. She suspected she did owe him one. Wasn't that the whole point of them agreeing to tryout a relationship, to get to know each other better? For a moment she hesitated, "It was a one time thing; it's not like I cut myself or anything. Usually, I'm able to control my anxiety. It never really got bad enough that I started having panic attacks and needed medication until after the accident with my parents when I started seeing everything as a threatening situation. Back in middle school, we'd have to travel for up to five or six hours on a bus for a track meet. Between pre-race jitters and being stuck with my teammates, forced to converse for that long, I was a bundle of nerves. Track is a solo sport, I mean, unless it is to pass off a baton, which was why I picked it. I liked soccer better but that required too much team playing and communicating with others.

"Anyways, my way of dealing with the anxiety was to just listen to my music. People tend to get the message that you don't want to talk when you have earbuds stuck in. One meet, my iPod was stuck into my backpack instead of my gym bag that morning. I already felt anxious and naked without it; I always carry my iPod with me. Add in the stress of the race and I was on edge. Teamembers kept asking me questions and trying to draw me into conversations and it was just too much negative, jittery energy. I wasn't even aware that I was scratching at my arm until we got to the meet and it was rubbed raw. There was a really thin, shallow line of blood. Stupid accident scarred way worse than I thought it would. A little bit of fading has occurred over the years but obviously not enough," she finished bitterly.

Damon skeptically inquired, "Isolated incident?"

"Yep. Well, mostly. I've caught myself doing it one or two times in really bad social anxiety inducing situations when I was already under a lot of stress or pressure. Like when everyone showed up at our house after the funeral service for my parents. I got out of going to the memorial and burial but Jenna demanded I make a short appearance for the reception," admitted Addie.

"You didn't go to your own parents' funeral?"

"Yeah, no. I, uh, I didn't handle their deaths very well. When we first met, that was me doing good. Plus, at that point I was still really, really, really pissed off at Elena, blaming her for the accident. Us in the same room was an extremely nasty mixture. Jeremy and I have gotten into physical fights since we were little. As much as she annoys the hell out of me and I her, it never got physical until a week after my parents died. I'm proud to say I did not throw the first blow, I restrained myself enough to not try and rearrange her face or really hurt her since she was a little banged up from the accident, and I was not the one who tried to strangle the other. Of course she didn't get very far with that. At that point I decided it was enough and I hit her just hard enough to bust her lip. Blood was going to be the only thing that stopped her. The girl sucks at it but when Elena fights, it hardy and dirty. Her nails are way worse than Jeremy's fists."

"Doesn't surprise me. Catty girl, Katherine's genes… She'd obviously throw the first punch; your better at controlling your anger and you'd think it pointless because you would obviously win. Fit runner versus willowy cheerleader; it's a no brainer. What does surprise me is that you guys made it through so many years without a physical fight," His hand went back to playing with her hair as he voice became quieter, gentler, "Do you regret it? Not going?"

"No," she answered after a moment of thought. "I didn't need to hear people speak about my parents as if they knew them when they never knew what they were like at home, out of the office, not presenting themselves to others. I already knew how good and amazing my parents were but I also felt a need to acknowledge the not so good parts that were hidden behind the fake smiles on the family Christmas cards. It just wouldn't have benefitted me to go. Besides, both my siblings gave speeches and I would have been expected to, as well. I was still too angry and emotional that anything I came up with would have been wholly inappropriate. And I am mortified of public speaking.

"Yeah, no, I think forever deleting family photos that were as old as digital cameras was far more therapeutic. Don't regret that choice at all!" she beamed sarcastically. "No photos containing me older than at about age 5 and Elena exist. Birthdays, vacations, Christmases, I deleted any photos with my sister in them off the only space they were stored: my dad's laptop. Saved the ones of Jer, Mom, Dad, and me on a memory stick and then smashed the computer for good measure. Jenna was so pissed when she found it that night in my parents' room. When Elena saw it she flipped because she actually knew what was on it. The look on her face when I told her I saved the pictures of everyone else… She's always going to hate me for that and I don't blame her; I hate a part of myself for what I did that day. We got into the fight the next day," Addie finished lamely, staring at her hands.

"When I was 15 I missed my mother's funeral because I didn't - I couldn't write the eulogy I was suppose to give. Eventually, I decided I was going to come up with it on the spot. I got dressed. Went in to help Stefan with either his tie or bowtie," Damon shook his head, trying to clear it, "I'm unable to remember which. I can't recall any of it perfectly since I had repressed the memory for so long when I turned that it will forever remain fuzzy. My father had told him that he was not to cry because Salvatores or men don't cry. Stefan was just a little kid; he hadn't even grown into himself yet and was all soft with baby fat. He was just a little boy who'd lost his mother; it was ok for him to cry. That's what I told him: he was a kid and if he felt the need to cry he should because it was ok for kids to cry." Damon scoffed bitterly, "You'd never think we were like that based on how we are now. Stefan told me that our mother had came and visited him as an angel the night before and told him that everything was going to be alright or some other platitude. I remember feeling so jealous of him. I knew he just imagined it or it was a dream but I was envious. Why hadn't she visited me, too? It was complete nonsense and utterly stupid.

"That was when the finality of it all hit me. You know, you're upset when they die but then there's this tsunami that comes crashing down and you realize that they are really gone and you'll never see them again. Kind of like how the shoreline draws way further out and you're kind of numb at first but then the tsunami crashes and reality comes flooding in with an emotional overload. Stefan's stupid angel triggered my tsunami. When the moment came to give my eulogy, I couldn't do it. I skipped the funeral and got shit-face wasted for the first time. The rest of the day is a complete blackout but apparently one of my father's servant had to carry me home after finding me at the back of the church. Looking back, that was probably the start of a very bad coping mechanism," Damon confessed quietly, making sure his last sentence was light and airy before things became too macabrely depressing.

Addie reached up and pulled his hand from her hair and interlocked their fingers and gently squeezed. "I'm so sorry, Damon. I didn't know your mom died when you were so young."

"I was older than you," he countered.

"True," Addie stretched out awkwardly. His vampire years aside, the age gap between her and Damon had been weighing on her mind more and more lately. It didn't bother her but it could be problematic; she didn't like having to watch how much time she spent with him to avoid making Jenna suspicious. "How dangerous would it be to get Jenna off of vervain just long enough for you to compel her?"

"Seriously, Addie? Do you not get how random you are? You make it impossible to follow a conversation," Damon complained. If she looked, his endearing smile would have been caught. "You and I probably have different opinions about that. With Elijah running around, I think it would be a very stupid and dangerous move, whatever the reason. Last time she was off vervain she stabbed herself in the gut and almost bled out. Why do you ask?"

She rolled her eyes at his tendency for dramatics, "It doesn't matter if you think any reason wouldn't be worth the risk."

"No but you have me intrigued. What could possibly be so important to you that you would even consider the risk of getting Jenna off vervain for me to compel her? And what could it be that you would think I would even agree to compel her about?" speculated Damon.

"Jenna's with Alaric and playing hostess to Elijah for his book writing cover. You being you means you'll be around Jenna since she'll be around those two, probably. I want to be around you. She might find it a little odd if I start following her around to everywhere you'll be and even then I'd just be around you. It wouldn't be like we could hold hands or anything. Jenna's barely coming around to liking you since she saw you kiss who she thought was Elena. According to her I'm not allowed to date anyone old enough to drive. I'll leave you to imagine how bad she would freak out if she even sensed something between us. I was hoping you would compel her to be indifferent to the idea of us," Addie explained, blushing.

His thumb drifted in lazy circles on the back of her hand as he thought about what she wanted. Jenna didn't always join Ric when they hung out, or more accurately drank and plotted together but when she did catch up with them at the grill or he couldn't ditch her, Damon was guaranteed a boring time. At least if Addie was there, he'd have someone who found equally hilarity and repulsion at their gushing over each other and lame inside jokes. Although, he did intend to get to know Elijah better, even if that meant having to use Jenna's connection with him to get to him. He wasn't particularly fond of the idea of Addie around the Original, especially since he suspected she trusted him, and undoubtedly she felt the same way about him. His eyes narrowed as he accused, "This isn't about us being together more. It's you wanting to babysit me."

"No, it's not!" she replied defensively. "I couldn't babysit you even if I wanted to. I can't watch your every move and try and talk you out of doing something stupid at every single turn. You're going to do whatever you want, regardless of my opinion. And frankly, I don't really care about what you do unless it's something that's going to get you or someone else I care about hurt. If you don't remember, I don't want to be involved in this supernatural world of curses and rituals. I helped out my sister a time or two but that's doesn't mean I want to dive right into the world of things that go bump in the night, unlike every other idiot in this town."

"You're being very defensive for a girl with the only motive of wanting to see more of me," Damon smirked smugly up at the sky. "Admit you want to babysit me and I'll think about it."

Addie scoffed, "That's pointless. You've already made up your mind. You said it would be a stupid and dangerous move whatever the reason."

"Yeah but it turns out you gave me a reason that might just be worth the risk. We didn't get into a relationship so we could hide how we feel about each other; that would be taking a step backwards. Almost everyone who matters already knows we are, at the very least, close friends," replied Damon quietly, gently increasing his grip on her hand.

With her free hand over her mouth to hide her grin, she snickered, "Aww, Damon. That was almost sentimental of you."

"Shut up and just admit your intentions," he scowled.

"Alright, alright. I want to spend more time with you but I also want to be around because I think you'll be less likely to do something rash if you think I might get hurt. I know you're still going to figure out a way to do whatever you want to do but that doesn't mean I should make it easy on you if I think you might get hurt."

Damon pulled at the shoulder of Addie's shirt smirking at her.

"You take the fun out of it when you have to be so smug," she grumbled, rolling until her head rested higher on his chest.

He caught her chin between his thumb and forefinger, encouraging her to come closer. "I'm not being smug; I just like being right. And it's kind of cute how worry about me."

"Well, you don't care so I figure someone ought to," she whispered. Her lips caught his in a gentle, meaningful kiss.

"You know I'm invincible. You shouldn't worry about me."

Addie brushed at the hair on his forehead and smiled slightly, "I use to think that, before I got to know you. You're not indestructible, Damon, physically or mentally."

He glared at her and snarled, "I am fine."

"First off, that's a lie. You can fake it all you want, but don't blatantly lie to me. Se-"

"Hi. My name's Damon. I lie," he interrupted flatly.

"Fine," she muttered in exasperation. "I was being careful not to really lie to you but I'm just gonna go with that when it's more convenient from now on."

Tension thickened in the silence of the quarry as their blue eyes locked in heated gazes. Damon decided to cut it with a snarky comment, "It's a good thing I'm a human lie detector."

Sitting back on her knees, Addie frowned at him and said evenly, "I trust Elijah because he has an elixir to save Elena. He originally got it for Katherine 500 years ago because he was in love with her. I'm guessing he's enjoying seeing the runaway bitch locked in the tomb as much as you. And I'm actually really pissed off at you for killing that innocent girl last night. Caroline and Stefan don't go off and murder people when they get upset so I don't see why you feel entitled enough to take a life. So, was I lying about Elijah or you?"

"Both," he shrugged confidently, his hands arrogantly locked behind his hand. "You're a really bad liar, Addie."

"And you're a really bad lie detector," she noted. "Fifty percent accuracy is failing. I'll leave you to figure out which one is the lie."

"They're both lies, Addison. I can read you too well."

Addie rubbed her hands over her face, shaking her head in disbelief. "Think what you want. I can't believe you just changed the subject from you to lying like that."

"Oh, give me a break. We both deflect," Damon sneered.

"Have you ever considered that maybe we should stop doing that with each other? That maybe we should communicate?"

Damon stretched his arms out in the air in front of him and challenged, "Communication is a two-way street. You sure you want to go down that street, Addie? You really want to share your deepest thoughts and feelings with me? There are plenty of things that I know are bothering but I don't press at them. You really want me to start poking around all because you're upset that I don't want to discuss what I told you earlier?"

"I have nothing to hide, unlike you," she answered, her lips pressing into a thin, hard line.

"Let's face reality. I know I promised to save your sister and I will die trying but the fact is Elena is going to die. Klaus is going to catch up and slaughter her. You want to tell me how you really feel about that? And I mean how you really feel, Addison? I know that anger and resent boiling deep down in you towards Elena plays a roll. We never would have ended up together if some tiny part of you didn't initially get satisfaction out of getting something she couldn't have. You never right out flirted with me in front of her but I assure you, if it had just been you and me on that trip to Georgia, you would have stuck with me instead of pouting the whole time. You were jealous that I was interested in her," Damon pointed out, daring her to talk about the unspoken taboo subject of her sister.

Addie laid on her stomach down the slightly sloping hill, facing the water. "I don't flirt with you in front of anyone. I barely even know how to flirt," she sniffed.

"Deflecting," Damon sung. "You can't ask me to share my demons when you're not willing to face yours."

A mother duck swam past them with three little ducklings trailing behind her. The last one fell out of line to poke at her beak at something on the bank. Curious, the second duckling turned around to join in with the first one. Elena, Jeremy, and Addie. Addie was always the one marching to the beat of her own drummer; she had to push the traditional gender norms when she was little, mischief and mayhem were always abound when her parents weren't keeping a close enough watch on her. Jeremy always got blamed when she would get stuck up in a tree or if they wandered too far into the woods and didn't make it back in time for dinner. It was most definitely his fault when she followed Jeremy down the steepest hill at the skatepark in her rollerblades. He was able to jump off his skateboard and regain his balance when he figured out that he wasn't good enough for that particular slope yet. Addie, stuck in her rollerblades, hadn't been able to find her balance and ended up falling, using her arm to brace her. The sound of people cracking joints still sent a sharp stinging in her arm where it had broken. Elena was particularly fond of using this torture device. But of course, duckling Elena was following the mother's trail, like the perfect, expected child. Saint Elena, the actress of the century.

"I don't hold you to that promise, Damon. I don't want you to die trying to save my 's the point of two deaths?" she replied bleakly.

"Closer but that's still not facing your demons.. And, for the record, I don't break promises. If I break this one that gives you reason to distrust everything I say."

"But flat out lying to my face when I know you're doing it doesn't?"

"It shouldn't. If we both know I'm lying then it means I don't want to talk about it because you are just going to be upset with the truth or it's personal."

"Weren't you the one just preaching communication?"

"No, that was you. I was making a point on how you don't want to communicate and discuss the fact that Elena's going to die."

Addie rolled onto her back and the slight slope they laid on made a little more blood than usual flow to her head, giving her a heavy, foggy feeling. Maybe more blood to her head would make it work better. She was getting confused in this conversation about Elena. The heady feeling from the increase in blood couldn't particularly be described as nice but it was distracting some off the attention she was giving Damon, who wasn't making her feel much more uncomfortable in a different way. "I already told you: Elijah has a magic potion. She's gonna be fine."

"You can drop the act, Ads. You're bad liar. Besides, what's Elena to Elijah? Why would he bother saving her? You wouldn't be stupid enough to put your faith in him and some mystical potion. Elena, maybe, but not you. You're story is filled with plot holes," replied Damon, annoyance lacing his words.

"You're right," she conceded, pausing for a moment to let him think he won. "She doesn't mean anything to him but by guaranteeing her a way to survive this he gets her cooperation. Elena doesn't go running off to Klaus, rather Elijah gets Klaus on, for lack of a better word, his own territory if he wants Elena and to go through with the sacrifice. Klaus, unaware of who we're working with, is caught off guard in enemy territory and is easier to take out. Elena goes off on her own, Klaus just has to get the moonstone, and, really, how hard is that? It seems like everyone's had it at this point. Then he can break the curse whenever he wants and Elijah misses his chance to kill him."

Damon's eyebrows rose; he was slightly surprised at how well she had thought that out on the spot. "One problem with your story. Elijah promised to keep everyone safe. If the plan involves Elena dying and relying on some witchy, ancient potion, that's not keeping her safe. That's a gamble at best."

"Elena told Stefan that she was going to be safe?"

He frowned, "I have no idea. I admittedly tune out when anyone starts talking about their significant other. It's boring babble that makes me want to poke out my eyes just so I can have an excuse to leave. But, back to the point, you told me Elijah said he was going to keep everyone safe."

"Technically, the deal was he would keep everyone Elena cares about safe. The arrangement never actually stated that he would keep Elena safe."

Damon jerked up into a seated position, staring at Addie, who seemed to be tilting her head back as far as she possibly could. He wasn't sure what to make of the complete lack of desire to sink his fangs into her perfectly exposed throat; her venomous blood aside. "You were brokering a deal for her and you didn't think to include, oh, I don't know, her living into it?! And what the hell are you doing?"

"Seeing the world from a new perspective, upside down. It really puts reality into perspective. And I wasn't actually brokering her deal; all I did was see an opportunity to try and get Stefan free. Elena knew the deal and it was her decision. This deal protects the people I care about, too. He either keeps it or we have two Originals to worry about. For the first time, since I was about 8, I'm actually looking up to Elena. Well, sort of. If Elijah isn't a man of his word I say she turn herself over to Klaus right away. Less collateral damage and all that."

Damon turned around on the blanket and laid so that their shoulders were touching. In attempt to understand her better, he awkwardly tilted his head backwards, trying to see this new perspective. Her hand found his and Damon brought hers to his lips, softly kissing the back of it. "Ads, I'm here for you to talk about anything and everything with no judgement. Text me at four in the morning and I'll be right there," he vowed. "Actually, you can send a text but you're gonna have to call and hangup. I'll wake to a phone call but a text notification isn't long enough. But you get my point. The thing is, and I'm not saying you need to discuss this with me, but you do need to talk about your problems with your sister."

"Yeah, sure, no problemo," Addie agreed sarcastically. "Just as soon as you talk to someone about your problems with Stefan. You guys have over 150 years head start on issues compared to Elena and me."

"I'm not supporting Stefan in a suicide mission."

Addie was quick to protest, "Martyr mission. She's protecting everyone she cares about."

"Either way, your sister is headed to her death and you're not trying to stop it. You're practically encouraging it. The question is why? Why do you act so unphased by her impending death? There's some deep rooted issues there. Are you ok about her dying? Is this just some weird calm before you officially freak out? She's your-"

"Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!" she burst out. "I don't want to talk about Elena!"

Damon turned his so he was looking at Addie. His hand cupped her cheek, first guiding her head back to a normal position before turning her face so it was right in front of him. Tears sparkled in her eyes, the dark blue color of the lake. He kissed her softly. "I'm sorry," he murmured against her lips. "I didn't mean to upset you."

Addie pulled away, yanking his hand off her face. "You're lying, again! That's exactly what you meant to do. You wanted me to get upset enough to talk about Elena."

"You need to talk about it."

"You need to talk about being miserable."

His jaw clenched reflexively as he looked to the sky and snarled, "I'm fine."

"Quit lying!" she ordered.

"You first."

"I'm not lying to you," she snipped, wiping at the hot, angry tears that leaked out. "I just don't want to discuss my feelings about Elena dying!"

Sensing his eyes on her, Addie rolled onto her side, resting her head on her outstretched arm and pulling her knees slightly towards her chest. Damon molded himself to her with an arm around her waist and rested his head atop hers. "I'm less miserable when I'm with you," he choked, clearing his throat. "I don't exactly know how or when it happened but people expect me to be a good guy now. Especially your sister, which is hard because even though I don't love her, I still care about her. Not at all like the way I feel about you," he reassured her quickly, feeling her stiffen. Damon squeezed her tighter to him. "With you, I don't feel like I have to be that guy. You know I'm a bad guy and you don't expect me to change. I mean, I killed someone and you aren't pissed."

"I am actually really pissed at you," grumbled Addie, maintaining her story from earlier.

He sighed heavily, "I'm being serious and you're interrupting with crap lies. You don't just deflect when it's about you; you do it anytime things get too serious or emotional for your liking."

"Emotions get you screwed, Damon."

"You're the one who suggested we stop deflecting and communicate. That leads to emotions Ergo communication gets you screwed. A relationship is built on communication and, well, you get where I'm heading. You know, you've been in a bit of a pessimistic mood today," Damon decided.

Addie pursed her lips; if there was anything that put her in a bad mood it was someone telling her that she was in a bad mood. She glowered, "Misery loves company."

"You really need to learn how to handle emotions."

"Pot to kettle. I didn't kill someone because I'm having an identity crisis," she muttered.

"You are my fucking crisis," growled Damon, rolling onto his back.

She frowned, placing her head on his shoulder tentatively, "What does that mean exactly?"

Damon huffed and… well, he didn't think it constituted as pouting if no one saw. He picked up a lock of hair and twirled the purple strands around his finger while considering his words carefully. "You know I'm a bad guy and you aren't asking me to change. You're still willing to be with me, which is some confusing combination of amazing and unbelieveable because you are a good girl. There's this part of me that wants to change and be the good guy because you deserve a good guy. But I don't want to change who I am for a girl. Last time I did that I ended up physically changing and it wasn't as cracked up as she made it seem. And, frankly, I don't even know if i can change who I am at this point. I'm just, I'm pretty certain I can't be the guy you deserve. It's awful knowing that and the right thing to do would be to let you go. But I'm a bad guy; I'm selfish and I don't want to be without you."

"Ok, I think I followed that but I'm not sure. Um, addressing one issue, it should be a known fact that Katherine was a manipulative bitch who convinced you into changing your personality and she was wrong for that. Second, why does everything have to be classified as good or bad? What happened to the middle? The only place you find just black and white is in a book. Even black and white TVs had shades of grey. Thirdly,I'm not a good girl. I'm playing for team neutral. I'm not on quest and missions to save people, save the city, save the world. I'm just trying to live a normal life and doing what's in my best interest. Sometimes that means doing good things and sometimes bad things.

"Fourth is that I deserve the exact type of person as you and that is someone who will respect and support me. The most important thing for you to know is that I don't want you to change, Damon. I don't like classifying you as a bad guy because you're not that simple. Your moral compass may be far from north but that alone doesn't make you a bad guy. I've been liking you a lot just the way you are for quite sometime. Why tweak a method that's working? I may not like you if you start acting like a good guy or one that you think I deserve. I want Damon Salvatore, the original make and model. Well, the vamped-up remodel; I hear the original was a bore and he'd definitely be one as a pile of bones now.

"I'm not denying that you have your flaws that I'm not crazy about and ok, I would prefer it if you came to me or drank or did something besides have a violent outburst when you get upset. But I don't need you to change any of those things. I don't want you to change into someone good, someone you're not. I know other girls have been a little confusing for you but I'm certain of which brother I fell for and it wasn't the one with the hero hair. I don't expect you to be some kind of hero. Besides, bad boys are more attractive," Addie smirked, pushing aside his shirt, where she had opened two buttons before, and tracing random patterns lightly against his chest.

He laughed, "Bad boys are bad for a reason. We are insanely attractive but make for very bad companions. Hero's are much more steady and reliable and also a bore. You can see why I would be reluctant to turn into one of those guys."

"Damon, Damon, Damon. I'm flighty and a bit unpredictable on the best of days. I need someone who can keep up with that and be a source of entertainment. For example, I've ended up here instead of at school today. It makes for an interesting change of pace in my attempt at a monotonous life," Addie grinned up at him cheekily.

Damon lifted his head, pulled her to him and gave her a long, slow, passionate kiss. "What am I going to do with you?" he mumbled more to himself, letting his head fall back against thee ground. "You are literally driving me crazy, Ads."

"I don't mean to," she answered while undoing the rest of the buttons on his pressed, black polyester shirt. It parted, the sides falling away from him with a quick sweep of her hand. Tantalizing fingers danced along the outline of his ribs and muscles. "At least 9 times out of ten I don't intend to drive you crazy," amended Addie reflectively.

It had been a long time since he had just laid out in the sun and Damon had forgotten how much he enjoyed it. Warmth of the sun reflecting off of his chest coursed through him; he was still cold-blooded but between the caffeine from his coffee and the sun, he could almost imagine normal blood flowing through him. It was little things about being human that he would always miss. However, a perk of being a vampire that he would never tire of was the heightened physical sensations. Chills ran up his spine as her nail traced down the center of his chest, dipping into his belly button, over his treasure trail and ending at the hem of his pants. Rolling his shoulders, he sighed, "Is this one of those one out of ten times you're trying to make me crazy?"

Addie shook her head, looking at him in confusion, "What are you talking about?" He raised an eyebrow and looked down at his exposed chest where she was lightly running one nail from tracing one rib to the corresponding one on the other side. She followed his gaze and quickly retracted her hand, her cheeks turning rosy red. "No. I, uh, no. I wasn't trying anything. I just like," blushing scarlet, she mumbled, "touching you."

Damon snickered, "You know, it's possible to do that with my shirt closed,"

The material of his dress shirt felt stiff and scratchy as she played with it, too embarassed to focus on Damon. Addie couldn't help but wonder why he would wear a pressed dress shirt to come lay out next to a lake as she looked down at it. She shook her head again, her voice barely more than a whisper, "That's not touching you."

"So you have a fascination with my bare chest, eh?" he smirked arrogantly, unconsciously flexing his pectorals and abdominals.

"Hey! Guys are entranced because girls' chest aren't flat. Girls should have just as much of a right to be captivated because a guy's chest is flat. It's the whole Sigmund Freud's penis-envy idea except for breast," Addie quickly responded defensively.

Damon laughed, pulled his shirt from her fumbling fingers and placed her hand back on his stomach, "I guess you could see it like that with gender roles reversed. Men envy women for having breast and subsequently somewhere in their basic programming they want breast and that's why we are so obsessed with them. Women are just enticed by a man's chest because it's the most socially sexualized part of the male body."

Addie succumbed to his tugging on her shirt and laid next to him, her head on Damon's shoulder. She pursed her lips, reviewing what he had said. It made enough sense to go with Freud's crazy theory; where the idea of penis-envy came from she wasn't sure. For making it up on the spot, it was good enough. "Yep. That is exactly what I meant."

"You know most modern psychologist and sexologist consider almost all of Freud's theory to be bogus?"

"I am a woman, which means whatever argument I see as right is right." Addie said, biting back a smile. "And you just made up the term sexologist."

Damon scoffed, "You see, it's that entitlement that other girls actually have that makes women think they should always win a domestic dispute. You were joking; you were trying not to laugh. Your abs betrayed you by contracting anyways." He squeezed his hand around her waist to emphasize his point, his fingers skimming the edge of her abdominals. "And one thing I don't joke about is sex which by extension includes sexologist. They are some freaky people. Alfred Kinsey? The guy was so weird but he had some of the best stories. I was bored and his work was interesting so I signed up for one of his studies but when I realized that this particular experiment involved him having sex with his participants in his attic and filming it, I had to back out. That got a little too weird for me."

"Seriously?"

"Oh, yeah," Damon nodded enthusiastically, even though she couldn't see. "Mind you, he was actually getting funded by a research company to do this."

"So, he was basically being paid to star in his homemade pornos?" Addie gawked in disbelief.

"Pretty much. It was so he could better understand his participants' responses to his questions about their sexuality and sexual practices, apparently."

Addie reflected on this new information, "I don't know if I'm more impressed that he got someone to pay him for having sex and it was considered scientific research - most people would consider it prostitution - or if I'm more confused about how having sex with someone is going to help you better understand sexual practices you've asked about in an scientific setting."

"That was my question. It just sounded like a pretext for him to have sex with guys without him facing his sexuality. I mean, some things are easier to demonstrate than explain but he didn't ask any questions that were like that, at least he didn't ask me. I don't do experiments anymore without knowing every step up front," Damon shrugged, slightly shifting Addie's head.

Perplexed, she couldn't resist asking, "What's easier to demonstrate than explain?"

"No," he drawled, his lips pursed and shifting from side to side as he thought about about her question, "no, nun-uh. Not having this conversation with you."

"What? Why not? You're going to get awkward about sex?" challenged Addie.

"No, I'm completely comfortable with it. I'm just not willing to go into the details and technicalities with you."

She huffed, sitting up, "You ever notice you get weird talking about any vague details of sex with me. Shouldn't we be able to talk about it? I get that we're not having it. I'm kind of happy that you have your weird issues because it means I don't feel any pressure to do something I'm not ready for. But I have to wonder, if I was someone else would you still have this weird hang-up? I mean, you didn't with Katherine, you haven't with probably a few hundred barely legal sorority girls. Would you have had this issue if I was Elena?"

Damon sighed and sat up as well. He raked a hand over his face and groaned. "No, no, I would not. But before you get all offended," he tacked on, seeing her frown, "you should know I wouldn't have an issue because you wouldn't be you and I wouldn't be attracted to you. It's just that you're so-"

"Young? Daenerys Targaryen is 13 when she's married off and traded for an army of 40,000 men. If you have read the Song of Ice and Fire, you'll know she is very, very, very much sexualized. There are some disturbingly graphic scenes for a series about crazy, murder-happy, incestuous families fight for power. Violet Baudelaire was 14 and she was going to be married off to some creepy old guy and that was in the very popular children's books A Series of Unfortunate Events. There's two pop-culture references right there that I didn't even have to think about," Addie interjected.

"Fiction, Ads, works of fiction," stressed Damon.

Addie frowned, a truly random thought coming to her. For once she wouldn't be able to explain how she came to the topic if Damon accused her of being random. Thoughtful, she asked, "You went into the war to avoid marrying my ancestor Madison Gilbert. What was suppose to happen after you came back? Or did you plan to hide for forever in the military before Katherine came to Mystic Falls."

He rolled his eyes, dropping to lean back on his elbows. He could give her the short version or he could risk oversharing and boring her with a little bit of information from a time in his life Damon rarely shared. He was definitely going to regret letting her get so close but he didn't know how else he was suppose to connected with her. He took a deep breath before launching into the past, "I didn't desert because of Katherine. I just said that to win favor with her and make my brother mad. I joined up as a way to escape a problem. I was sent out to Richmond in January of '61. I probably could have avoided any wedding plans and not gone out until March, which would have been a hell of a lot warmer. First few months nobody really knew what was going to happen with the North. We grunts mostly wasted a lot of ammo and alcohol. There was some training but a lot of it was just disorganization.

"Things got a little more serious in April when the first batch of troop was sent out to Fort Sumter. After that, more rules and routines and regulations were enforced but it was still pretty lax, especially compared to today. The Confederacy was a bit arrogant from Sumter. They didn't feel the need to take themselves that seriously. Early July, I was sent out with 75% of the base to a few miles outside of D.C. July 21st was the battle of Bull Run. They say there were over 32,000 men on the Confederate's side. It lasted two days. Turns out Southern boys who grow up hunting made for better soldiers than city boys. The Union was back on their side by sunset of the 22nd. My guess is that only 7,000 of us in the South even fired a shot.

"At that point uniforms weren't standard issue and friendly fire could be a bit of a problem. I was working with a shotgun and had my arm up and extended aiming for my first shot. A guy behind me fired off a pistol. Lucky for me he was a shitty shooter and the bullet only grazed the side of my ribs, just below my armpit. Idiot was going for my heart through my back. You'd think he'd be smart enough to not fire at me, considering I had my gun pointed towards the enemy," he snorted in disgust at the stupidity of some.

"You got shot?" Addie whispered in horrification. His storytelling skills were just so mesmerizing; she could listen to him for hours. A little voice was telling her she had asked him something that he hadn't answered but she couldn't remember what it was.

Damon looked at her in surprise, "You haven't noticed?"

Her eyes narrow as she looked at him skeptically, "Noticed what?"

Sitting up, he pulled his right arm out of his shirtsleeve and grabbed at his left shoulder with his right hand. Damon nodded his head towards his side, "That."

"I thought you couldn't scar," Addie murmured, running her finger over the puckered skin almost three inches long. How had she missed this? Admittedly the keloid scar was exactly where he said, just below his armpit, and his arm would have to have been positioned correctly for her to access it. But her hands had been all over his back and chest; she should have come across this thin scar long ago.

Enjoying the warmth of the sun, he decided to just take his shirt off. It didn't look like Addie was going to stop staring at his scar and tracing it any time soon and he felt kind of stupid with his shirt half on. "I don't scar now, thank god. Do you know how torn up I'd look? However, I was human when I was shot and I scarred then. Spent four months in the sick bay for that little scrap once we got back to Richmond. Hygiene was crap back then and it got infected. I'm still convinced it's from the catgut stitches that absorbed into my skin. Yes, catgut. They were made of intestines but not necessarily a cat's.

"Once I was all patched up I went to several smaller battles and a few bigger one for the next two and a half years. When I wasn't fighting my job was to fix guns, sharpen swords, give firing lessons. If it involved your weapon you came to me. I was impressive. Followed orders. Always did more than expected. Was likable. I rose through the ranks quickly. While rising, I learned more about what I joined. I didn't question what I was being told; we had to defend slavery because otherwise there would be a slave rebellion. People like Nat Turner and John Brown's raid at Harper's Ferry made that appear to be a real fear. Churches said that by rejecting slavery, the North was rejecting the Bible and of course they found text to support their agenda, like every side of every moral cause does.

"That brings us to May of 1963, when I was granted a leave of absence to visit home for the first time since I left. My father gave me a grand welcoming. He was all talk about how proud he was of me and how I was doing the noble and right thing and telling Stefan he should follow my lead once he turned 18. I should have been happy to finally have my father's approval, especially considering how upset he was for breaking his marriage arrangement when I left. It was apparently a very beneficial dowry for him, something about a new business with the entire Gilbert clan. It wasn't like it is now; each Founding Family had several nuclear families rather than one. The wealthiest family within the family was considered the leader of the the family name.

"Weird thing about coming home was that my father and I never really saw eye to eye and suddenly we did. While I wasn't being a love struck idiot chasing after Katherine, I was questioning everything I'd been hearing in the military, which was what my father was preaching. I uncovered that his motivation was the nine billion dollars that the would come as an economic lost to the south if abolition happened. He'd actually have to pay people to run his… everything. The time came for me to go back and I started to but I realized I didn't want to. I enjoyed the military life well enough but I didn't agree with what I was fighting for. So, I deserted and was a disappointment to my father, yet again."

Addie cupped his cheek and turned his head towards her, pulling his distant gaze back to the present. She smiled at him slightly and softly pressed her lips to his. Reluctantly, she pulled away; her question still wasn't answered. "I love hearing stories of your past. And I'm sure I'm going to regret saying this someday but I actually like the sound of your voice and listening to you," Addie sighed, letting her hands rove over his upper chest and shoulders. "What was the plan if you hadn't died and your brother didn't kill your father?"

"You mean if I was smart and hadn't suggested we try and rescue Katherine?" he posed blatantly with a raised eyebrow. "Well, my father, once he calmed down, would have arranged another marriage."

"Any idea with who?"

Damon rubbed at the back of his neck uncomfortably, "It would have been someone from a Founding Family not already matched up or married. I mean, even Stefan already had a wife selected for him. The Families only married within each other for a long time. I think they finally branched out when it got to be a bit incestuous. The list of girls that weren't already in contracts was limited and my father would have exploited my war hero status, saying honorable discharge, and the fact that I already had my own personal savings separate from the family money. He probably would have put me in charge of some large section of the company to show me as having a stable, high status and high paying job. He'd do all that just to raise the dowry that came with a wife because he was a greedy bastard. Those factors included it would have been between between Lucinda Fell and Charlotte Lockwood; their parents would have been the only ones with the money and unclaimed daughters old enough. Really, women were just property. Thank god for the feminist movement."

"How old was old enough?" demanded Addie, giving him an accusatory glare.

"They were 14 and 15 but it doesn't matter! That was a different time and culture," Damon answered quickly.

Gently, she pushed him to his back and rested her chin on his chest, "It was the time and culture you grew up in, so you can't say you're weird around me because I'm 'so young.'"

He rubbed at his face in frustration. There was no way he could explain it to her without it sounding awful. "Ok," Damon groaned, "I can't explain why I get uncomfortable with you when anything comes close to the idea of us having sex. I just get a knotted pulling in my stomach. Can you just drop it? I've knocked off trying to get you to talk about things you don't want to."

"Fine," she sighed, resting her cheek against his chest. The beating of his heart was a soothing metronome. As they laid there, the combination of his rubbing of her back, the steady thumping beneath her ear, the warmth of the sun and having been up all night, Addie could feel her eyelids start to droop. In attempt to stay awake, she forced back a yawn and asked, "W-w-why do you tell me so much about yourself? I'm not complaining; I like it. You're just a very private person and it seems very unlike you."

Damon bit at his lip, considering what he should tell her and what to hold back. He didn't want to lie but oversharing could result in a severe backlash. "You're right. Usually, when I want a girl to know I care about her I show her physically. I can't do that with you right now, possibly ever!" Damon blurted out, words vomiting up out of his control. "Then I have to ask how else can I get you to realize I care about you? I figure trusting you with my past, my thoughts, such personal things-"

"Yeah, yeah, I get that," she interrupted icily, lifting her head to scowl at him."Go back to the 'possibly ever' part. Are you not attracted to me or something?"

"No. Yes. I mean, it's more something," he fumbled for words, propping himself up on his elbows and shaking his head. He groaned, pressing the heels of his palms into his eye. This was never suppose to come out. "Of course I'm attracted to you, Ad. I wouldn't be with you if I wasn't attracted to you."

"I'm stuck on the 'no' and 'something' bit," snapped Addie.

Damon winced and hesitated, "Don't get mad, at least not until I get to explain myself." He looked to her for confirmation but she just glared back expectantly. Damon sighed and took her hands from his chest and into his own. He didn't want to but he had to tell her the truth. Damon bestowed a kiss on the back of each hand before catching her hard gaze. "I'm head over heels for you, Ads. When I fell for you, I really started to fall. I'm still falling. I'm falling faster than when I started because gravity is just pulling me closer and closer to you," he confessed, feeling exposed and vulnerable. "I am more than attracted to you. I just have a problem as seeing you as someone who can be sexually desired past a certain extent. Shh. Let me finish. I-"

Addie was shaking her head, her mouth hanging open, insisting on interrupting him, "We've been - No, I've felt you - You let-"

"I said, 'Let me finish,'" he repeated, slow and firm. Guilt ripped at him for the tears that sparkled in her dark blue eyes. "You've sensed my body physically respond to stimuli. I very much enjoy kissing you and making out with you but that is the limit for as far as I am literally capable of finding you desirable. I can't imagine doing anything further with you without feeling disgusted with with myself, which I will promise to explain better. It's why I have all the rules and limits when I'm with you. It's too easy for me to slip up and to just go with what feels good rather than sticking with what I really want or believe. When I'd get back to my senses after going any further with you, I would be completely disgusted and angry with myself. I want things to happen between us because we want them to and we care about each other, not because I'm acting on baser instinct."

"This isn't a very good explanation, Damon. So far I've just gathered that I'm too disgusting for you to do any more than kiss," she gritted out, growing self-conscious and frustrated.

Damon ran his fingers through his hair anxiously. There he went again, picking up her nervous habit. He spent too much time with the girl. "It's the exact opposite, Ads. You're too perfect for me to touch, too good," insisted Damon, looking into her eyes imploringly, needing to see that she understood. "Ads, I look at you and I see everything I'm not. You're made of innocence and purity and naivety and wholesomeness and sweetness. You're fragile, delicate, breakable, untouchable. Me? I'm rough, reckless and covered in blood. I can't touch you. I don't want to break, sully, taint or tarnish you. I mean, I've already kind of corrupted you. If it wasn't for me, you would never have gotten a hickey or bite marks all over your neck."

Her heart was racing and a swarm of butterflies invaded her stomach. It was just like those early days with Damon when everything was all nerves or when he looked at her like she was the only person in the world. Addie's hand found Damon's and interlaced their fingers. She leaned in a pressed a kiss firmly to his lips. Feeling him start to respond, she pulled her knees under her, freeing her other hand to travel into his raven locks. Damon sat up further, allowing the kiss to deepen. Eventually, he pulled away, a puzzled look on his face.

"Not that I am opposed to that response but I was expecting something more negative."

Addie tilted her head from side to side in consideration, "Because you basically downgraded me to a porcelain china doll? I'm a little annoyed and insulted. That you're worried about breaking me or ruining me or whatever? I think you're stupid and giving yourself a little too much credit but I'm choosing to focus on the idea that it is sweet of you to worry about wrecking me. And, hey, how many other guys are going to think that I'm too perfect or good? You're completely delusional and wrong in thinking that, for the record. And why would I possibly be upset that you're hang-up surrounding me is a catch-22. You basically said you can't think about me sexually because I'm inexperienced but I'm apparently going to remain that way because I'm in a relationship with you and you can't help me gain experience as you're still bothered by my inexperience."

Damon pushed the long sweeping bangs out of her face and behind her ear. Her little smile was beautiful and the little dimple she got under her right eye when she flashed it; he couldn't help but stare. God, he was so screwed. His brow furrowed, catching something that needed correction, "It's not a downgrade, Addie. I've never looked at anyone the way I look at you. You're like the North star, shining brighter than all the rest. I've never worried about hurting someone; even with Katherine I was more worried about me getting hurt."

"That was valid," Addie pointed out. "Someone's going to get burned when two brothers are sleeping with the same vampire whore. For future reference, when my sister makes a move on you remember that I won't make your mistake."

He reached out and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her into his lap. Damon sighed in content when she wrapped her arms around his neck and lightly scratched at his back. "How many times do I have to tell you that I'm not interested in your sister?"

She shrugged, "You're capable of having sex with her. The offer might be tempting, especially since she's a good manipulator. Something about her dying and having a face you've loved all your life and how you once loved her and she love you too but oh! She just couldn't becau-"

"Alright, alright," Damon cut her off before her increasingly high pitched and airy voice could break glass. "You don't trust me with your sister; I get it."

"Pretty much," nodded Addie.

He rolled his sky blue eyes at her dramatically, "You're suppose to say you trust me but you don't trust her."

She dropped her head to his shoulder and buried her face in his neck. The crisp, musky, sandalwood accented scent of his aftershave tickled at her nose. It was a reassuring, familiar smell at this point. Addie mostly trusted Damon but he did have a weakness with women and she definitely didn't trust her sister. "Am I going to have to eventually cheat on you so you'll sleep with me?"

His arms instinctively tightened around her and a low rumbling stirred deep in his throat. Damon shook his head, "No. I… I don't like the idea of anyone touching you. You're too cherishable for anyone to touch."

"That's getting a little ridiculous, Damon," she sighed in exasperation. "I'm not going to live my life as a nun."

"I know," he mumbled in distaste. "I'll figure out a way to get over it."

Addie leaned back, placing her fingertips along his jaw. He must have shaved before he showered that morning. With a gentle pressure she was able to direct his head from side to side. "No," she drew out, "you won't. We'll figure out how to get over it. You're gonna have to work on the stupid idea that you're going to break or mar me. I'll have to work on showing you that I am not as naive and sweet and pure as you think and that I am completely capable of corrupting myself. If you recall, I've been the one trying to take things further, I can't keep my hands off of you and I get you shirtless every chance I get."

Damon held her tight as he laid back with her on him. Addie shifted her hips so they weren't on Damon while wiggling out of her green and blue flannel, leaving her in her dark green tank top. She scrunched the shirt into a ball and placed it next to Damon's head, resting hers on it, looking at his profile. He yawned while she was settling herself and responded, "How about you don't try and prove anything? I like you the way you are. Let's just hope that one day I wake up and see you in a different light. I want you to be naive and innocent for as long as possible. I want to protect you from the darkness in this world as much as possible. You have no idea how grateful I am that you aren't like your brother and sister and don't want to be involved in all the crazy that goes on around here."

His yawn caused her to yawn in return. "I guess."

He turned his head so that the tips of their noses touched. Bags under her eyes and a lack of color in her cheeks suggested that she was tired. The fact that she didn't argue with him confirmed it. "Tired?" he asked softly.

"Kind of. I was up all night worrying about you since you wouldn't talk to me and I suspected things weren't going well," she answered, slightly bitter. "Actually, I kinda got tired of worrying around two in the morning. You're a big boy. You've survived 170 something years without me. But I got a really big rush of inspiration for my music. I finished this really great song that I might actually submit to London. I was feeling really high and decided to go for a run and see if I could get higher doing sprints but the newspaper burst my bubble."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry you. I'm not use to having someone care and didn't think about how my ignoring your messages might have concerned you," apologized Damon, briefly holding her tighter. "That's really great about the song though. Would you let me listen to it? If not, that's ok. I get that your music is really personal for you."

Her eyes closed as she had a mental game of tug a rope on whether or not to tell him. Eventually, Addie conceded, "I was actually going to share it with you right before Elena called. I guess I can still but not right now. I'm too comfortable." She yawned again.

Damon couldn't disagree; Addie draped across him was very comfortable. "Mmm. Much agreed. You can fall asleep if you want, Ads," he murmured, feeling her kind of jerk herself back to awareness.

"What about you?" she whispered.

He rubbed at her back and stroked her hair, feeling her already start to relax. Between dealing with Rose's body, the body of the girl he killed and his own demons, he hadn't exactly had a restful night either. "You're not the only one who didn't sleep last night. We could both use a nap."

"Much agreed," she mumbled, echoing him.

Gently, Damon brushed his lips against hers. "Sweet dreams, Ads."

"You too, Damon."

It only took a few minutes for Addie to fall asleep with Damon following her soon after. In that moment, at the lake in the quarry that held one of Damon's darkest memory, basked in the warmth of the spring sun, wrapped in each other's arms, sleeping, everything was perfect. There were no Originals to worry about, no haunting ideas, no problems between them. Being together just felt right and that was all Addie could think when she woke up about an hour later.


Wind whipped Addie's hair around her face as they traveled back into town. Monstrous, grey rain clouds had rolled in and the air was muggy. Addie couldn't understand why the were riding with the top down considering the look of the sky but Damon had insisted that it wasn't going to rain. Damon had been acting much more closed and guarded since he had received a text message. He had tried to be discreet in checking it but Addie still caught him and the dark look that crossed his face. Shortly after, he was ready to leave.

"I want an honest answer, Damon. Why are we suddenly rushing back to town?" Addie demanded, speaking over the wind.

Damon's lips twitched towards a frown but he quickly returned to unreadable,. "As much as we may have liked to stay there for eternity, we have to return to reality."

"Honest. Evasive. You're up to something. What?"

"Don't worry about it, Addie. It doesn't concern you," instructed Damon.

Addie rolled her eyes, "Yeah, because that's always stopped my curiosity. What's going on?"

"Nothing. I'm just going to go have a friendly little chat with your uncle, " he answered far too innocently.

That confrontation was obviously going to happen, Addie knew the second her sister mentioned Uncle John being back. It was merely a question of who tried whom first. She sighed in exasperation, "Can you at least try to play nice and not snap his neck? He's my uncle."

"He tried to kill me."

"Technically, he couldn't have really tried without my help. It was my idea to not despell the vampire torture device. I wanted you dead. John wasn't the only one who tried to kill you," Addie pointer out, trying to persuade Damon into being cordial without him noticing.

"Yeah, I wouldn't bring that up. I'm only like 95% over it. Why can't you be like everyone else and hate the guy? You know what we haven't discussed that is kind of important?" Damon casually asked, switching topics.

She wasn't going to push the topic of John with Damon. Addie didn't think he would kill John because he knew she cared about John and it would hurt her but he was Damon and you could never be certain. Reluctantly, she gave into his deflection, "What's that?"

His brows knitted together as he thought about his own opinion on the topic. "What or when are we telling people about us?"

"Ah, uh, well, I've kind of been lying," Addie admitted awkwardly. "Jeremy asked the other day about what was going on between us since he hadn't heard anything since our date. I told him we're just friends; we didn't really click like that. Elena thought we were together but now she believes that we're not because of you and Rose. I haven't bothered to correct her because it means I don't have to hear her snide comments. Bonnie and Caroline think the same as Elena because she has a big mouth and can't keep anything private to herself," she finished, scowling at the memory of her sister.

Damon nodded slowly, "Ok. Do you want people to think we're not together? I'm a little confused since you want me to compel Jenna to being ok with us."

Addie bit at her lip uncertainly, "Can't you just compel everyone? I don't want to lie about being with you but I don't want to hear everyone's warnings and comments."

"No. As much as I would like to, I can't protect you from all the assholes in the world," Damon said, taking her hand and giving her a quick, apologetic smile.

"How about we just do us and when someone catches on, we don't deny it but we don't necessarily answer unless we are explicitly asked? That way we're not hiding that we're together but we don't have to throw a coming out party," she finished lightly.

Damon frowned, "What exactly do you mean by 'do us?' How are we supposed to act together around other people?"

She shrugged, "We just do whatever we're comfortable with.. For example, I know from the tone of your kiss whether it would be one you would be ok with someone seeing or if it's just between us. I'm not comfortable with anyone seeing any of our kiss, though. I know your personality is going to be completely different when we're around other people than when we're alone; mine is too. I expect we might tease or bicker with each other more because we're simply both more abrasive than when it's just you and me. I mean the PDA is common sense; if we don't think the other person would be comfortable with it, don't do it."

"Yeah, ok, but what about things like personal space and relationship norms versus friendship norms? Do I try and sit next to you? Do I only do it if it's a convenient option? Or do I not sit by you at all? I haven't exactly dated a girl where these things are questions," he prattled.

Addie squeezed his hand reassuringly, "You're overthinking it. I know the signs; I am the queen of overthinking and making things more complicated than they need to be. If you want to sit by me, sit by me. If you don't, don't. I'm not going to get offended. If you're lucky I might feel bold enough to put my head on your shoulder! Really, Damon, do what you want unless you think I'd get embarrassed by it. If it's something that makes people put two and faster then so what? I'm not with you to worry about how you act around other people; I'm with you for the you that no one else gets to see. If you want to act like we're nothing more than friends, that's fine. If you want to flip around and give a million mixed signals depending on what kind of mood you're in, do it. That's probably how I'm going to end up acting. The only thing that matters is that we get enough time alone and there are no mixed signals there. Just be you, Damon, but be considerate of my desire to not have my personal life on display."

"Ok. Want to come babysit me while I talk to your uncle?"

Addie rolled her eyes, "I'm not trying to babysit you. I trust you to go alone."

Damon bit back a smirk, "I was more hoping you'd come to give him an aneurysm. His favorite niece showing up with his least favorite vampire."

"I take that back. I don't trust you to go and behave."

"I'm already giving him an advantage," he mockingly whined. "He's at the Grill. Nice, open, public space."

"Explains why we had to suddenly leave. God forbid you risk missing this one and only opportunity to threaten my uncle. It's not like he's probably going to be around for at least a few days," Addie scoffed, pulling her hand away.

"I'll make it up to you."

Addie shook her head, "You can't. Moment's over"

"That's the one good thing about time. I'll make a new moment," promise Damon, annoyed that he had let his grudge ruin the little taste of paradise they had laying out at the lake.

She answered apathetically, "Whatever, Damon. I don't want to go to the Grill. I want to go home."


A/N: Thank you to everyone who had words of comfort or were supportive when I took a brief hiatus from working on this. It's still very difficult for me to write this but Addie's and Damon's story still has a lot left to it. With your guys' continued support, I'm sure that I can get through it. Updates may not be every Friday/Saturday like I prefer but they will continue on a regular basis as long as interest is still shown in the story.