"Are you going to tell me?"

Glancing at her, he found her eyes on their children, who had just followed Thomas to the small stream a few yards away.

"Tell you what?"

She rolled her eyes. "Why you suddenly have decided you do not want to know your children."

With a sigh, he dropped his eyes to the blanket beneath them. "I want to know them."

"But...?"

"I just...I don't want them to hate me," he admitted softly.

The feel of her eyes on him tugged at him, but he willed himself to keep his on the blanket.

"Why would they hate you?"

Swallowing down what felt like the knot in his throat, he shook his head. "For not telling them."

Silence fell between them, the sounds of nature and Cassie's giggles the only ones reaching his ears. At a rather thrilled squeal from Cassie, his gaze found his daughter being thoroughly soaked by Thomas and William who'd taken to the stream and were presently splashing her. The small smile that came to his face could not be helped despite the feelings coursing through him.

"We can't tell them," she whispered after a time.

A heavy breath escaped him. "I know."

Out of the corner of his eye, he noticed her shift closer to him, her shoulder brushing against his before her hand laid over the back of his against the blanket, her fingers slipping between his.

"Ichabod-"

"I know they'll be angry with you, maybe even hate you. I've always known that, but...I've only just realized that if I spend time with them, get to know them and them-me..." His eyes slid to hers to find a frown creasing her features as she stared at him. "They're going to hate me, too, Katrina."

Her eyes fell to their hands as she began rapidly blinking. "I won't let that happen."

"And how will you stop it?" he asked softly. "Whether it be tomorrow, or twenty years from now...they'll find out, Katrina. They'll realize that the two people who were supposed to love them, protect them, have been lying to them since the moment they were created."

Face contorting into sorrow, she jerked her eyes back to his. "But we are protecting them. If my coven ever discovers who they are...what they are..." She gave a hard swallow. "As they grow, William and Cassie will understand the responsibility that comes with being powerful beings, the secrecy that comes with it, and they will understand why we're doing this. But even if they don't..." With a squeeze to his hand, she moved even closer to him, her face so near they were sharing each other's breath. "I will never let the blame fall on you. I will take it all, my love."

Lifting a hand to stroke her cheek, he shook his head. "You may have made the decision, but I've chosen to go along with it. They will resent me."

"Ichabod-"

"If my parents had kept such a secret from me, I'm not sure I would have been able to forgive them."

She shook her head. "This isn't the same thing."

"But it is, Katrina." He glanced to his children who were still splashing away. "My father and Abraham share many traits. With both of them, they're main motivation is by society and what it thinks of them. I know, in his way, my father loved me, but...he never said it, never went out of his way to show it." His son's smile was so bright, his daughter's laughter so precious. "If I were to find out that my true father was someone else, someone who would have loved me, cherished me...it's not fair to them, Katrina."

"You and I both know that life isn't fair, Ichabod. If it were, we would be raising our children together...as a blissfully wedded husband and wife."

Shaking his head, he added, "William flinches every time Abraham so much as looks at him while Cassie goes out of her way to please him and he never so much as glances at her." His eyes found hers again. "We would condemn our children to this fate? To grow up with the burden of being unloved?"

"We don't have a choice," she whispered dejectedly.

Frustration began to seep into him. "We could leave here."

Her expression fell into despair. "My love..."

Once again, he touched her face. "We could. Just because I'm a Witness doesn't mean I must stay here and...you're my protector. Wouldn't we be safer together, away from danger?" As her breathing began to pick up, he leaned his forehead to hers. "We could have everything we ever wanted, a family, a life lived together."

She shook her head. "We have responsibilities to more than just ourselves. The world's future depends upon us to make the right decisions." He dropped his hand from her, his frustration deepening as she continued. "You have to stay here and learn the things that will help you in your mission, with Washington and Franklin, the ones who are preparing you."

Jaw clenched, he pulled away from her completely.

"Please, don't be angry with me for doing what you and I both know is right."

Anger crept into him as his breathing began to become erratic, his chest rising and falling heatedly. "I don't care to hear your excuses again. I've heard them all before."

Her sigh reached his ears. "Then, why do you keep pushing this? You always do this, just when I think you understand."

"Because I love you," he bit out heatedly, his gaze jerking to hers.

The flinch of her body away from his combined with the panicked expression she bore as she quickly turned her gaze to their children calmed him considerably.

"I'm sorry," he whispered after a moment. "I just...I love you so much, Katrina."

Eyes still on their oblivious son and daughter, she nodded. "I know."

"Mama!"

His gaze flew to Cassie who was coming up the hill toward them.

Katrina smiled brightly. "What is it, sweetheart?"

Cassie dropped to the blanket in front of them, water dripping from her red curls. "Look what I found." Her small hand shot out, palm up, to reveal a small butterfly.

A sharp gasp of delight left Katrina as she held out her hand for her daughter to ease the small creature over. "It's beautiful, Cassie."

"It came right to me and sat in my hand!"

Katrina smiled as she observed the colorful creature. "Did it? Well, isn't that something?"

Ichabod asked, "Have you never caught a butterfly before?"

Cassie gave an exuberant shake of her head. "I've never caught anything before! William always has to catch things for me. Mama says it's because I can't be still long enough."

Speaking of William, he came bounding down upon the blanket beside them.

"Did you see what Cassie caught, William?"

The boy gave his mother a bright smile as he crawled to lean into her.

"William," Katrina laughed, "You're getting me all wet!"

His son's giggle floated through the air as he wrapped his arms further around Katrina who was half heartedly attempting to escape. It was truly a sight for him to take in. His love being taken to the ground by their two beautiful children. It was almost enough to swipe all doubt from his mind...Almost.


"Put him down here," she whispered, pulling back the covers of the bed.

Once again, his son had taken to his arms and fallen asleep. They'd had quite the day out beside the stream, leaving his little one completely spent. Gently lowering William to the bed, he observed Katrina tugging the small boots that adorned his feet while glancing to Cassie who was climbing in on the other side.

"I'm not sleepy, mama," she said, even as she wiped at her eyes in an attempt to keep them open.

Now removing William's filthy shirt, Katrina sighed, "Yes, you are. Now lie back and get some rest. You've had a long day."

Cassie did as she was told, then turned her blue eyes to his. "Will you tuck me in, Ichabod?"

Hesitation took him over as he noticed Katrina glance back at him. They'd not spoken again regarding their conversation earlier, but the tension between them was palpable.

"Of course, Miss Cassie," he said, making his way around the bed. Lifting the blankets up and over his daughter, he gave a small smile. "You were very pretty today."

Cassie's eyes fell closed, but that didn't stop her grin. "Really? As pretty as mama?"

Eyes flickering to Katrina, who was slipping the covers over their son, he nodded. "Prettier."

"Ok," came her small whisper as sleep began to take hold of her.

He remained standing there until he was content that she was in fact asleep. With a brush of his hand through her red locks, he leaned down to place a kiss to her forehead. "Sleep well, my little love."

Overcome with emotion, he began making his way from the room. Exiting through the door without a glance back, his need for air was pushing him quickly down the hall and into his room. Throwing the window open, he leaned on the seal, taking in a much needed breath, allowing the cool night air to seep into his lungs. He'd felt as if he'd been holding his breath in since service earlier in the day, his emotions scattered all over. Anger. Frustration. Happiness. Joy. Longing. Sorrow...Rejection. He felt as if he'd experienced the gauntlet of emotions and now all he wanted was to get away from it all. With another deep breath, he glanced out into the night toward the line of trees behind the von Brunt home. Night had fallen and now, as he found himself staring into the dark woods, he felt his heart beginning to beat so rapidly that he felt it would beat right out of his chest at any moment. Collapsing against the window seal, he released the sob he'd been holding in for what felt like years.

"Ichabod..."

He couldn't bring himself to turn to her. He couldn't bring himself to do anything but let the floodgates open, only furthered by her body pressing into his back, her arms coming around him.

"My love," came her whisper as she pressed a kiss to his back. "I'm so sorry."

Unable to hold himself up any longer, he slid to the floor, doing his best to gain control of his breathing, but found it evading him. Her hands made their way to his face as she knelt beside him.

"Look at me," she whispered soothingly. "Just look at me and breathe. Breathe with me."

Staring into her green eyes, he followed her example as she took in slow breaths, her fingers cupping his neck as her thumbs gently stroked his jaw. Finally, after what seemed forever, his eyes fell closed as his breathing calmed. It didn't take long for her hands to begin tugging at him until he was leaning against her, his head against her breasts, her hands around his shoulders. After a moment of simply allowing her love to consume him, he whispered, "What is to become of us, Katrina?"

Her response didn't come quickly causing him to dread her answer all the more.

"Katrina?" he prompted again, gripping the back of her dress.

With a deep breath, she answered, "This is it, Ichabod. Neither of us want to admit it. We've delayed it, hoping another outcome would present itself, but I think we've both always known...this is likely all we'll ever have."

Eyes falling closed, he tightened his hold on her, fearing that she would disappear from his grasp at any moment. "You expect me to simply accept that? To not hope for more?"

"Of course not," she whispered, her hands stroking his hair. "I would never ask you to relinquish your hope, but we can't keep doing this. You do need to accept that right now...we can be no more than we are. Whether we want to admit it or not, I am married to that..." At her pause, he lifted her gaze to find her eyes filled with unshed tears which she quickly blinked away. "I'm married to Abraham. William and Cassie believe him to be their father. Those are facts, my love. Facts that cannot be forgotten simply because we're caught up in a whirlwind of emotion at the moment. These last two days, we've experienced a freedom with each other and with our children we'll likely never have again." She shook her head. "You have to stop getting angry with me."

More than confused, he frowned. "What?"

With a sigh, she answered, "Every time you get this notion that I can just up and run away with you, or throw away all the work I've accomplished here and am still accomplishing, I don't think you comprehend just what you do to me."

"Katrina-"

"I know this is hard for you," she interrupted gently. "And I know you have every right to be angry, furious even, but there's nothing I can do to help that. I have given you everything I possibly can."

Overcome with emotion, he attempted to respond, but found none forming.

"I have given you my heart, my body, nearly three beautiful children. Ichabod, I would give you my very soul if I could, but when-" Her eyes fell from him to their now entwined hands. "Forgive me, my love, but I'm simply not sure what you want me to say. We've discussed this so many times, so many different ways. This discussion has began to circle in repetitiveness and it's draining all the tolerance I have." She sighed despondently. "And it always ends with you scolding me, or calling me names. You storm off with words of your love being gone and your never wishing to see me again. Then, I'm left completely alone in the aftermath of your outbursts."

"Katrina-"

"No," she whispered, holding up a hand. "I need to get this out." She took another deep breath. "I have lain in my bed and wept for you, for the pain I know I've caused you, for the absence I never cease to feel when you're not here with me. At times, I've been so in despair that death has held its arms out toward me, tempting me to accept its comfort. The loss of your love nearly drove me mad."

Taken aback at her confession, he felt his heart tearing in such a way as it never had before. The very idea that he'd caused her to think of death was too much. Unable to take another moment of her sorrow, he leaned completely into her, capturing her lips in a desperate kiss. Hands tugging her even closer to him, he pulled her into his lap, needing to fill her with his love. It took her a only moment to respond to him, but then her hands wove through his hair as she pressed flush into him, drinking in all he had to offer.

"I'm so sorry, Katrina," he whispered desperate for her to know. "I'm so sorry, my love."

Her tears wet his cheeks as she leaned her head to his. "Just please don't do that to me again. Please."

They sat that way for a time, simply breathing in each other's love. He'd made mistakes with how he'd handled things in the past, but he couldn't help the thought that things were different this time. There was more than just he and Katrina to consider.

"I know I've handled things terribly," he finally whispered, catching her eyes. "I just...how many will we have, Katrina?" His hands fell to her belly where their child rested. "Will we stop with this one? Or will we have another? And then another? How many children will I be forced to ignore? To give to Abraham to call his own?"

Her mouth opened to respond, but no words came forth.

Leaning close to her, he shook his head. "We were meant for more than this, Katrina. I know we were. I understand, I truly understand why we can't be...but we've been reduced to committing adultery, to sneaking about as if our love is wrong and should be hidden."

Hands lifted to his face, she spoke softly, "I can't answer those questions, Ichabod, but...we don't have to-" A shaky breath left her as she closed her eyes for a moment before focusing back on him. "We will do whatever you want. What happens from here on is in your hands, my love."

Eyes dancing over her tense face, he answered, "I don't know. I know I don't want to live a life of secrecy, but I also know I don't want to live a life without you."

The hard swallow she gave as she considered his words left him curious as to what she was thinking about.

"Ichabod, no one knows a life of secrecy more than I. My entire life, I've had to keep a part of myself hidden from the world. When people ask me how my mother died, I have to lie. When I found a love, I had to lie. No one even knows who we are to each other, how we once ran the streets as children hand in hand. I have two beautiful children who I have been lying to and about since the moment I knew of their existence. And now, I'm sitting here with you discussing if we should carry on with how we feel." She laughed tiredly. "Another lie doesn't bother me, Ichabod. It's a way of life for me. But I understand that it's not your way of life. You've never been one who was comfortable with deception. So, I'll say again...this is your decision, my love."

Taking in her serious face, he couldn't help but wonder at the sorts of thoughts she must entertain. So much of her true self was hidden behind a steel wall that no one was permitted to enter, not even him at times. He considered himself lucky he was allowed in at all with how skittish she was to allow affection toward others to be seen. With a heavy breath, he brought a hand up to brush a few strands of hair from her eyes.

"I can't lose you," he whispered in defeat. Meeting her gaze, one that permitted nothing in the way of what she was thinking, he added, "I'll take anything you offer me, Katrina."

She leaned in, brushing her cheek to his as she whispered in his ear. "My heart and body are yours." Her lips ghosted the shell of his ear. "Take both, my love."

With a firm grasp on her waist, he stood them both up before carrying and depositing her on his bed. As he began to remove his clothing, he took in the tenderness gracing her features as she observed him. So little happiness followed either of them, but here, together...he felt they almost had it. Kneeling before her, he gently began removing her boots.

"They deserve better," he whispered, wanting her to know that just because they'd reached a decision for the moment, their discussion was far from over.

"I love our children," she began softly. "And I love you more than anything in this world, but...don't all mothers? Don't all true lovers?"

With a frown, he glanced up to her. "Katrina-"

"It's isn't fair," she cut in as her fingers deftly pulled at the laces of her dress. "They do deserve better and so do we. We have sacrificed our happiness and now we must sacrifice our children's happiness because there are so many other people who need us to. All those mothers, all those lovers, they deserve happiness, too. But they'll never have it if we fail to stop what is coming to steal it away."

Returning to his task, he finished with her feet before sliding his hands up her legs and latching onto her dress to pull it from her.

"I'm not going to stop hoping for more," he answered as her body became exposed for him, "Attempting to find a way."

"Never stop hoping, Ichabod," she whispered, her hand finding his cheek. "Never."

At the end of his patience at being separated from her, he leaned up to capture her mouth with his own. With gentle care he settled himself between her thighs, paying mind to the place their baby rested.

"This will be an old habit for us one day," he softly whispered in her ear. "I swear it will be."

Hands teasing his back, she nodded. "I shall hold you to that, my love."

With that promise, they once again met each other in a most sacred way, soaking in every moment of the other's love.