Goren wedged himself into Lewis's white Sedan in the direction of Brooklyn. He knew he had to give back the car to his buddy soon, and check in with him too. But for now Goren needed to stop by his own apartment to pick up a suit for his meeting with Ross. He turned the key in the lock and entered, surveying his living space.
He had stayed at Eames's for five consecutive nights and his own apartment suddenly didn't seem familiar. The dust and mail was piling up. He also had quite a few messages on his machine that he hadn't thought to check, but it was nothing that couldn't wait.
He found himself not wanting to linger in his bedroom because he felt his anger rising whenever he though about Dryden's hidden camera and the trouble it had caused. Realizing his apartment still had no liquids (like shaving foam) or food (coffee), he made internal plans to come back later. Goren dressed quickly, donning a gunmetal gray Ralph Lauren suit and white dress shirt (grateful that at least Ralph made suits Big and Tall) and jumped back in the car.
He aimed the vehicle in the direction of Manhattan and pressed his shiny black shoe down firmly on the gas, his cobalt blue tie still draped loosely around his neck. He made an effort to pin on his badge however, and he wondered morosely if it would be for the last time. He noticed that the day was overcast which didn't seem to bode well. If the weather was warm or cool that morning, he didn't feel it. Robert Goren was trapped completely inside his own head.
Despite being unshaven and having one bloodshot eye, the detective still cut a fine figure as he strode towards Ross's office. Oddly, not one of his colleagues raised their eyes with a 'hello', and the two bald detectives, Jeffries and Andrews, actually appeared to be avoiding his gaze. Wheeler was not about, and Goren was glad. He felt reticent about just how to thank her for the professional and personal favors she had done for him. It would not be as uncomfortable as talking to Liz - but still.
As he approached Ross's door, Goren did not possess one tenth of the confidence he was attempting to project with his suit and his stride. As always, he crossed the threshold into his boss's domain with a sense of trepidation.
His relationship with his curly-haired captain had always been complicated. To be fair, Ross never could have met the bar set by Deakins, but the man hadn't even come close. From the moment they'd met, Goren felt an almost palpable flare of dislike, and recognized from the look in Ross's eyes that the sentiment was more than mutual. It wasn't that he thought Ross was a bad person exactly, they were just born under different stars. The new captain had come in to Major Case with preconceived notions. He'd been like a bloodhound pit-bull cross who had been given Goren's scent in advance, and ordered to attack on sight.
The first case Goren had investigated under Ross's charge had been Eames' abduction. The traumatic events coupled with the Gages' astounding involvement meant that Goren had not been at his clear-headed best. He had missed the early signals from Jo, and had been sent into a tailspin in his subsequent search for Eames. Ross witnessed how badly Goren had handled the situation, and the captain no doubt formed an opinion on his stability that day. After that, things between them seemed to go from bad to atrocious.
But Goren could not deny that although Ross had been glib, condescending, and even downright disdainful at times, he had also shown backbone on more than one occasion. Not only had he not fired him when he might have deserved it, Ross also stuck out his professional neck for Goren in the aftermath of Tates, and fought for him to be reinstated after his successful undercover operation. But the captain always seemed to lose any ground he'd gained with Goren before the dust ever had a chance to settle...like that time that Ross had him investigated for Frank's murder behind his back. Yes, their relationship was certainly complex.
Throughout the Dryden case, Goren's regard for Ross had steadily risen. There was no doubt that Ross had acted quickly to ensure Eames was safe and protected in hospital, and he had demonstrated a determination to protect Eames, and Goren too, from any humiliation stemming from the sex tape.
Still, Goren was tense. Ross knew that he and Eames had recently become involved, and the captain would now have to make a decision on whether or not he was going to ignore it. Goren was also aware that Ross was not a little pissed that Eames had gone after June Fletcher alone, and gotten Mike Logan involved to boot. Although Eames was cleared for her actions by IAB, the event likely did not leave a strong impression of Ross's leadership with those upstairs. Despite the general dislike he had for the man, Goren did not wish to see the Captain suffer any fallout.
Goren knocked and entered, and met with the bright blue eyes that seemed to hold the secrets of his fate. There was a range of expressions on his boss's face. He did not stand up nor offer his hand to Goren.
"Take a seat detective." Ross gestured to the swivel chair opposite his desk.
Goren would have preferred to have remained standing, but he did as he was bidden, feeling the absence of Eames' in the room. "Why am I here captain?" asked Goren.
Ross was never one to appreciate preamble anyway. "There are a number of issues we need to discuss detective."
Goren spied the folders and files on Ross's desk. Dryden's autopsy report was on top and he had clearly been examining close-ups of Dryden's autopsy photos "Why are you reviewing that," asked Goren, nodding his head towards the manila folder.
"A copy was requested upstairs," answered Ross.
"Moran?" asked Goren.
"Not directly. It seems someone's taking an interest though"
"Why? Are they reviewing the cause of death?"
"No – it was definitely a murder," stated Ross.
"Then why the review?" asked Goren. The concern in his voice amplifying.
Ross didn't beat around the bush. "They're checking the consistencies of your statement with his injuries."
Goren reeled. "What? Why? Yes, I punched him on the nose, but I deliberately held back my full force. There was no nasal fracture present; I read the report." Goren sighed. "I just, I just wanted to stun him to find out what he knew. It was one hit captain - just one."
"Well that's what someone's trying to confirm – whether it was just one."
"You can't be serious! I volunteered that statement. I could have said nothing and nobody would have known." Goren voice was initially outraged, but slowly dissolved into defeat.
"I believe you detective, but look at him." Ross handed over an autopsy photo of Dryden's face. The young man was covered with bruises and cuts of varying ages and degrees of seriousness, but all were recent.
Goren examined the facial injuries. "He was being abused in there captain. He had his teeth yanked out for God's sake. These marks were present before I ever walked into Rikers."
"I know, and I'm sure the prisoner from the same block – Lawless – would testify to that."
"Testify? There's going to be a hearing?" Goren swiveled his chair from side to side before pushing it back on its wheels with his feet. He maintained his grip on the photo.
"It's doubtful Goren, but I can't rule it out either. I've tried to handle it internally but this case has been so high-profile what with the FBI and IAB involved and the attempts on you and your partner's lives. We're all under scrutiny here. With Fletcher being murdered, it brings the body count to this case to…"
"Five" finished Goren. He counted the deaths in order on his fingers, "Gatehouse, Moses, Dryden, Craven, and Fletcher."
"We're just lucky it wasn't seven," added Ross sincerely. Both Goren Eames had been poisoned and hospitalized thanks to Dryden's deranged obsession.
Goren breathed a sigh of relief when he remembered that Eames was OK; he could maybe possibly cope with another hearing if it came to it, as long as she was OK.
Ross picked up on his agitation and tried to reassure him. "What's in you favor is that you volunteered the statement, and that no eye-witness can refute your version of events. Sure, you shouldn't have gone to Rikers to see Dryden after you found that camera, but since I hadn't officially taken you off the case... Well, I have the feeling that it probably won't be delved into much more deeply, Nichols and Wheeler have done a great job with the reports."
Goren nodded, already thinking of ways to handle the worse case scenario. "So if someone has it out for me and insists on a hearing, Lawless could submit a statement that this," he held up the photo of Dryden, "...was inflicted by Craven. And maybe Rodgers could testify that these injuries could not have be caused by me."
Ross sighed. "Well detective, therein lies the rub." Ross pressed his two index fingers and thumbs together and pointed them in Goren's direction.
"What do you mean?"
"Rodgers' potential testimony," Ross said in a monotone voice.
"What about it?" Goren was blindsided. Had she changed her opinion?
"It was recently hinted to me by a 'friend' upstairs that Elizabeth's words could be perceived as biased."
"Biased, why?" asked Goren, fearing the answer.
"Because of her relationship with me," admitted Ross.
"What's that got to do with anything?" demanded Goren.
The captain sighed once more. "I've backed you over the years Goren. I don't think you realize quite the full extent of it. Moran and company think I cover your ass because you make my statistics look good."
Goren didn't comment, but his leg started to bounce up and down. He didn't know what to say to that. "And?"
Ross continued in a strangely neutral fashion. "And that it could be perceived that I could influence Rodgers into forming an opinion that backs my own agenda. Consequently, a second opinion on the autopsy has been requested. Dryden's body has already been cremated, but another ME is going to take look at the evidence collected so that two opinions are in the mix. They say it's just to be on the safe side," he added dubiously.
Goren knew that Ross wasn't disclosing the full story or specific names. Someone higher up had obviously embarrassed the Captain on a personal level and questioned his, and Rodgers', ability to be objective. It was insulting to all parties concerned. He'd seen how Deakins had been almost forced out by NYPD politics. It was all a game. "Captain I never meant for it to affect you and Rodgers, if I'd known, I..." Goren stopped. He felt contrite, but he couldn't lie.
"Would you have done anything differently?" asked Ross.
Goren considered the question before shaking his head. Provoking Dryden in that way had led the prisoner to utter his cryptic 'pink and white flowers' comment. Deciphering what that meant had saved Eames' life and got her to the hospital on time. "Moran still wants my head on a platter, doesn't he? And he'll go through you and Rodgers to do it if he has to."
"I'm not sure about that Goren. I don't know precisely what's going on up there. He's in a foul mood and you are a visible target he can lash out at. He needs to be seen making an effort at cleaning up the department."
"And I'm the dirt?" Goren leaned back in his chair and almost laughed when he recalled Moran's conduct in regards to Patrick Copa. The Chief of Detectives had shown he'd back a dirty cop over a clean one if it suited him.
Ross lowered his voice. "The heat might be on you and me for now, but I have it on good authority that the situation could change at any moment. There are rumors that some... evidence of a sensitive nature has been unearthed. I'm guessing it's something that was found in Fletcher's apartment that involves either Moran himself or one of his close cohorts. With the gag order placed on the case, I can't find out precisely what it is. Maybe Kenneth Moran neglected to do his spring cleaning over the years, and he's trying to make up for lost time." Ross looked smugly satisfied. "I can only speculate mind you, and I ask you to please keep this between us."
Goren nodded swirling the new information around in his mind. "So when is my hearing gonna be?"
"Like I said, it may not get that far. But you should contact your rep just in case. I'm not a betting man Goren, but if I was, I'd put my money on you for this one. I don't think you should worry yourself too much. I just wanted to give you a heads-up in the event of a worse case scenario."
Goren didn't buy the optimism. He was just so sick and tired of the politics. They wouldn't just allow him to do his job no matter what his stats were. This is precisely what had made him so listless and indifferent. He was more than aware that he'd lost his passion and purpose over the past year or two, and sometimes questioned why he fought to stay on. Goren raked his palms through his hair, and finally put Dryden's photo down. He'd been through a hearing before and it had cost him almost six months without pay, and he'd been lucky they hadn't gone after his pension. It had almost cost him Eames as a partner too.
"Eames," stated Goren suddenly.
Ross was used to his sudden changes in topic. "What about Eames?"
"She's in the clear with all this?" Bobby was concerned.
"Yes she's in the clear and from IAB no less. And you're fine to get back to work too. You're not on suspension Goren, nor are you being forced to take leave - either paid or unpaid. In fact, you can both come back on Monday on one condition."
And therein lies the rub, thought Goren. He glanced at Ross. "What condition?" he asked.
Ross handed over a large paper handbook to Goren. "That you read this over and answer one question for me."
To Goren, that sounded like two conditions. He picked up the handbook and opened it to the section Ross had bookmarked with a post-it. It was 'The Supervisor's Guide to the Anti-fraternization Policy'.
Ross did not wait for Goren to object. "As far as I'm concerned, who my detectives see after hours is their own business. But as you can see with my situation with Rodgers, it can seep in to the workplace all too easily., and with serious consequences."
Goren responded a little too quickly and curtly. "You think I don't know that captain? You think I haven't read this a thousand times! I understand why personal relationships between partners are off limits. I get that our actions and objectivity could be questioned in the courtroom. And that's why it didn't ever happen for the last ten years. I don't need to read this. I know it by heart." Goren closed the handbook, but continued to hold it in a death grip.
Goren's voice was laced with a defensive tone as he quoted from it.
"Let's see, what's first? 'problems occurring at home could transition to the work place and vice-versa', am I quoting correctly?" Goren didn't wait for a response. "What else? 'Such relationships could lead to a lapse in attention in life-threatening situations, potentially undermining public safety.'"
Goren held the handbook and slapped the cover with one hand. "And my favorite quote 'sexual or marital relationships generate intense emotions, which may interfere with an employee's job performance and the cohesiveness of the partnership or the squad as a whole.'"
Goren realized his voice had gotten louder, and that he was halfway out of his chair. He tried to compose himself and maintain an appearance of calm in front of Ross.
Ross put his hand up to stop him. "OK Goren. I get it. You're familiar with the policy. I gather you have strong feelings regarding whether or not it's credible enough to apply to you and your partner. But let me tell you from personal experience, volatility hits some relationships more than others."
Goren wanted to refute the policy vehemently, but he didn't completely lack self-awareness. The truth is it could apply to them. His emotions were already intense when it came to Eames, but all police partnerships were like that, weren't they? He had always loved her regardless. With their new-found willingness to talk out their problems, he hoped that much of the tension between would now have an verbal outlet. Maybe they could avoid some of the professional issues they'd had when their communication was lacking. It could even be better between them - at least he hoped so.
Goren spoke quietly. "You're going to split us up aren't you?"
"Goren for someone who's somehow able to empathize with the worst criminals society has produced, you could at least try to understand where I'm coming from here."
Ross had a point. Goren did not often put himself in his captain's shoes. Did anyone really empathize with their workplace superiors? Goren stared at the manual, his defiance waning. The point of being part of the squad at all eluded him if he couldn't work with Eames.
Goren didn't look up as he took a breath and spoke softly. "I understand the difficult position you're in Captain. You have to consider the integrity of the squad above all else. You've witnessed me flailing when cases get personal, and you think I'm not going to be able to work with her now because her just being there will make every case personal." He returned his gaze to Ross. "Don't sweat it captain. I'll make it easy on you and offer my papers right now."
Ross couldn't help himself; he rolled his eyes at what he perceived to be Goren's burning martyr routine. "Detective, believe it or not, I want you on my squad. We may not always see eye-to-eye but you and Eames are among the best in the entire department, and you know it. The higher ups might complain about you, but who is it they demand when it really counts?"
Ross paused to let his words sink in. "I already told you that you and Eames could come back to work on Monday. You can work a case or two and report back to me on how it's going. Naturally, I expect you to keep your workplace interactions professional and to be discreet. If anyone gets wind of the relationship, you know it will more likely be Eames who gets a mark in her jacket, and I won't be able to prevent it."
Goren knew this was true. Eames was senior partner and although the distinction of rank between them was only minimal, it was still there. She would be perceived to be in the position of power, and as ridiculous as it sounded, it could be construed as being in the realm of sexual harassment if the relationship were to end. Still, Goren heard the good part of Ross's rant too. "So you're not going to split us up?" He sounded hopeful.
"I didn't say that detective. I do take that policy seriously, and I think it was written for a very good reason." He paused and decided to tell Goren what he'd had in mind. "Look, with Wheeler leaving after the baby, I've been given approval for a new hire. He's already been interviewed and selected, and is due to start in three weeks. I plan to rotate him among you, Eames, Wheeler and Nichols to see which combinations work best."
"You're thinking of partnering me with Nichols?" Nichols was senior, and Goren was junior. It made sense in that way.
Ross cracked a genuine smile for the first time since Goren had delivered his large presence into his office. "I told you Goren, I'm not a betting man. That would be a risk not even a Vegas captain would take."
Goren wasn't insulted. Nichols was a good detective with finely honed instincts, but the two of them were too similar to balance each other. Even now Nichols was doing what Goren desperately wanted to do – provoke an investigation into the abuse in Dryden's block at Rikers.
Goren sought clarification. "So Nichols with Eames and me with the new guy?" He did not like that idea either. - not Eames with Nichols! He almost felt a possessive adolescent jealousy. "Who would be senior partner?" He was referring to Eames and Nichols, not himself and the new guy.
"Goren, just allow me little time to figure out which combinations will be effective. The senior/junior distinction is at the discretion of the mayor's office. Honestly, although the difference is minimal, it would be a whole lot easier if you and Eames were of exactly the same rank. You're both first grade, but it would help if neither of you were subordinate to the other as far as the fraternization rules are concerned."
"You'd give her a demotion?" He was stunned.
"No, I'd try to get you a promotion."
Goren shook his head ruefully. "You know the mayor's office loves me about as much as Moran does." Goren knew he'd never get a minor promotion to senior partner even though it attracted no increase in pay - not after his Tates operation. That unauthorized turn of events had gotten him a suspension, and had earned Eames a mark in her jacket. Even Ross had gotten a slap on the wrist. As per usual, it was the personal cases that always ended up in dire straights.
He looked at Ross. Brown eyes met blue with equal intensity. "I won't have her career affected by this," Goren declared.
Ross nodded. "But you know that it would be affected if the two of you were ever found out. She could be a sergeant, lieutenant or even captain someday soon. But in the eyes of the department, it's considered a professional conflict of interest. If this relationship is to continue, it will have to be an airtight secret. Can you both sustain that?"
Goren had considered this. As a highly respected female detective in arguably the most elite squad, Eames had a lot more to lose than he did. Women did not have an easy time of it, and she'd fought so many years to earn the respect of everyone she came into contact with. Messing with your partner was a fast and furious way to lose credibility.
Goren was in a quandary here. He had to at least consider Ross's proposal of a partnership shake-up."Who's the new guy anyway?"
"It's someone you know. I think he could be a good match for either you, Eames or maybe even Nichols. You remember Detective Daniels."
"Daniels?" Goren felt a further flash of jealousy. He didn't like the thought of Eames working with Daniels or Nichols. Eames was his partner and his alone.
But he had to stay rational. "He's a good choice." Goren begrudgingly admitted. Daniels was an effective and honest detective with a solid reputation, and Goren had appreciated working with him on the Joe Dutton case . Even Logan and Wheeler had given him kudos, not to mention the way that Eames had raved about his stellar stint as her temporary partner on the tourist murders. Goren had been jealous of Daniels then too, and felt that Eames might be rubbing it in his face to hurt him. Their partnership had been dangerously brittle back then, and how he had fought to win her back. He couldn't lose her again!
Ross interrupted his thoughts. "Could Daniels be a choice you could work with if it came down to it?" .
He wasn't ready to agree to let go of his partnership. He wasn't sure if he would ever be ready. Couldn't it just go on forever?
"I don't know Captain. Why don't we just see if I get to keep my job first?"
Ross got glib then, as was his nature. "I'm sure you will, and I'm equally sure that you'll welcome Daniels into the squad and show him the ropes no matter who he ends up being partnered with."
Goren nodded gruffly in agreement. There was the condescending Ross he knew so well. There was a prolonged silence as Goren tapped his foot thinking it over. Then his expression changed. "Captain, you said Eames and I could come back on Monday on the condition that I answered your question, what is it?"
Ross sat forward in his chair, his shoulders tense. "I was wondering when we'd get to that. It's the reason I brought you here today if you want to know the truth," he stated soberly.
"OK," said Goren tentatively. Ross was as serious as he'd ever looked, and he always looked serious. Goren started to worry.
"I know this is hypothetical detective, but I need you to answer this before I send you two back out there. I'm not questioning your integrity, but you'd have to agree that your first obligation is always public safety, your second responsibility is your partner's safety and your third is yourself."
Goren had been in the army as well as the NYPD. He understood. "Agreed. So what's the question?"
Ross looked him in the eye. "I want a candid answer here Goren. If she were under serious threat, who would you protect first – a member of the public or Eames?"
His question struck Goren like a heavyweight blow, and he was down for the count. He knew well and good how he should respond. It was what any ethical police office would say – the public came first – always and without question.
But it was almost certain that any man or woman, even a police officer or soldier, would on pure instinct choose to protect his or her own family over an unknown member of the public.
Eames was his family now; but he'd always loved her. Had anything in their relationship really changed ? He couldn't deny to himself that it had. The incredible turn of events of the past few weeks meant that she was more precious to him that ever. And he loved her more fiercely than he thought possible.
And unlike those hypothetical police officers and their families, Goren's only loved one would be beside him every day in unpredictable situations that could turn at any moment. Neither of them had ever put a foot wrong in the past, but now?
He knew it was indeed a hypothetical question, and he strongly resented his captain for posing it. He wanted to berate him and convince him that he'd have enough presence of mind to save both Eames and some random member of the public. But this was the New York City Police Department, and split second life-or-death decisions were a requirement of the job. He didn't doubt his courage, but was it ethical to risk testing out his objectivity?
Goren could not answer Ross's question honestly just yet – so he didn't try to.
In a quick and decisive move out of the swivel chair, Goren quickly made his way towards Ross's office door, turning his back on his Captain. He opened it and just before exiting, Goren turned his neck slightly to one side as though checking a vehicular blind spot. He muttered his response to Ross over one shoulder. "You'll have my answer by Monday."
