Chapter 28: And the Oscar goes to…

Her telling him not to worry didn't really help.

Not that he expected it to, but sometimes even he wanted to believe that it could be that easy.

Still he was sitting in Cuddy's office, him and her on the comfortable couch, watching Eric Foreman sit down on a chair front of them.

"Dr. Foreman. I assume you know why we are here", the dean of PPTH started und House frowned at the word assume, tapping his cane to the floor. Cuddy threw him an angry look, but then turned to the neurologist again.

"Of course I know why we are here. Obviously you don't think about protecting your sources", his coloured duckling snapped, making House growl.

"I figured it out on my own, thank you. Though it wasn't really hard to find out after you directly ran to her after the measles diagnosis."

"You shoved her skirt…!"

"I know what I did! And don't you think Cameron is capable of defending herself? She always tells me when I'm pushing too far!" House interrupted him, with Foreman narrowing her eyes on him.

"Please. You know how she is feeling for you. And you are taking advantage of that!"

House growled again, not being able to sit through that and got up from the couch.

"Still none of your business. There are no frat-regs for doctors in this hospital!"

Cuddy looked at him confused.

"Frat-what?"

House sighed.

"Jeez… It's not your concern whom I'm fraternizing with!"

"Fraterni… oh, okay, I got it!" Cuddy turned back to Foreman, who still looked as if he hadn't understood what his boss meant.

"What makes you think Dr. House is sexually harassing Dr. Cameron."

Foreman straightened his back, looking at Cuddy and not at House, who had started pacing behind the couch, his cane thumping loudly onto the wooden floor.

"She seems to be hiding from him. He's somehow always touching her… grazing her fingers when he made her bring coffee, the thing with the skirt…"

"I diagnosed that she was sick!" House burst out, but Cuddy silenced him with one look.

"Couldn't she just be busy instead of hiding? Has she ever told you she felt uncomfortable when he touched her? Can't these touches just be coincidence?"

"It's too frequent for coincidence."

Cuddy looked over her shoulder again.

"Could you sit down please? You're driving me crazy!"

House stopped pacing and reluctantly sat down again, his eyes fixing on Foreman.

"Because I'm touching her I'm harassing her? You touched her too, you lay a hand on her shoulder once!"

Foreman snorted at that.

"Yeah, once. But I don't phone her to ask her what colour her panties are!"

House growled again, this time feeling like the lion Hannah had compared him to. He really wanted to kill the youngster right now.

"You don't even know if that was Cameron."

"You joked you asked that question because she was bored. She even told me you phoned her when she had been in the lab, being bored by the test", the neurologist put out his evidence while House rolled his eyes.

"Right. Cameron was the only bored female on earth that noon."

"Well then tell me who else you phoned", Foreman dared, making him narrow his eyes.

Cuddy sighed, looking at the two doctors.

"You know, that actually is a good idea. Tell him who you phoned, and we can go back to work."

She was surprised by the angry look he shot her.

"That is none of his business! Don't you see what he's trying?!"

Her mouth gapped open for some seconds, then she closed it again.

"What am I trying?" Foreman asked the diagnostician meanwhile, a dangerous smile around the corners of his mouth.

House looked at him calmly.

"Open confrontation doesn't work. The old lion's not the weaker one there. So you try mobbing me out by destroying my reputation."

While Cuddy frowned at the comparison, Foreman continued to grin.

"I'm just trying to save a colleague and friend."

"The hell you are. You are using her to get rid of me. And save the friend bullshit. You were the one telling her that she was just a colleague!" And he still hated himself for what he had done to her when he let Foreman steal her article.

"I changed. She saved my life." Foreman stated calmly

To his surprise House didn't explode. He just stared him down, his face motionless.

"There's nothing I can do to make you take the accusations back."

"Not until you tell me and show me proof of who you phoned that day."

"That is not going to happen."

Cuddy sighed.

"That doesn't get us anywhere. Why don't you just…"

"My private life is NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!" House snapped at her. They would never leave him alone when they learned who was his current love interest. They would never leave her alone. He still needed to make sure that Cameron was okay with him and Hannah and it bugged him that he cared enough about her to make sure that she was okay. Wilson had to swear on all the hookers and nurses he had banged that he wouldn't tell anyone.

"I knew you phoned her!" Foreman exclaimed.

House just pressed his lips together. Cuddy turned to him again.

"House… just… and if it was her, so what? I'll talk to her… we can arrange something…"

"Yeah, and then she has to be afraid to loose her job for no reason every time she opens her mouth!" Foreman snapped, regretting what he had said when House's expression changed.

"It's not her who will lose her job!" he growled in his most dangerous, low tone that made the neurologist want to run and hide.

"You… you are threatening me…" he got out, making House growl again.

"I'm not threatening you. The decision is already made."

"You are firing me because I reported you! That won't work!" his coloured soon to be ex-duckling exclaimed.

"I'm firing you because you're not doing your job. When Cuddy has talked to Cameron your accusations will be worth nothing, so it's a win win for me."

"Yeah, because Cameron's too afraid to say anything against you!"

House just stared at him and the dean of PPTH sighed again.

"Why can't you just tell me whom you phoned?"

House stared at her, his blue eyes for once pleading her not to ask him again, not to pressure him.

"Because it was Cameron!" Foreman piped up, being startled as well as the two other doctors when a female voice behind them spoke up.

"No, it was me."


Three pairs of eyes looked at Hannah McLachlan who was standing in the door towards Cuddy's office.

"What are you doing here?" House finally managed to say. She looked him directly in the eye, her expression not changing a bit when she said "I had an appointment with my doctor who didn't show up. Found him in here instead."

His mouth stood open for some seconds at her ability to lie without showing the smallest bit of a sign.

"I… I must have forgotten", he stammered, still confused why exactly she made up the thing with an appointment.

"He phoned you?" Cuddy piped in really confused.

"If we're talking about the panty-call Foreman came telling tales, then yes. It was me."

Foreman rolled his eyes at that.

"What did he offer you for that? My job?"

The head of genetics laughed loudly at that.

"Dr. Foreman, I do believe I have already a better job. And he didn't ask me. I overheard the conversation. You are not exactly quiet in here."

Cuddy had turned around to House again.

"You are molesting her?"

" I AM NOT molesting ANYONE, for heaven's sake!" House growled, throwing his stranger an angry look. That didn't make anything better.

"You asked her about…"

"Yeah, I know, I was taking part in this phonecall if I remember right! And I have no interest in sexually harassing anyone!"

"That doesn't prove anything! He still could pay her!" Foreman snapped, being hit almost immediately by a cellphone.

"Look it up. His number is in the list. And think about side effects of Vicodin."

Now three confused eyepairs looked at her. Foreman frowned.

"What side effects of Vicodin could make him incapable of harassing women?"

House just groaned and hid his head in his hands. Cuddy's eyes suddenly widened when she saw him hide.

"Oh…"

By now the diagnostician shook his head. That was so not happening. Standing up from the couch he couldn't even look at Cuddy when she made a second "Oh… my…"

"I'm out of here!" he growled, limping past Hannah and slammed the door behind him.

"What side effect…", Foreman started again, being cut off by the dean of PPTH.

"You've lost, Dr. Foreman."

"But… Why??!!"

Hannah took back her cellphone, growling at the neurologist.

"Look it up."

Cuddy watched the female neurologist leave her office, not listening to the complaints the other one murmured into his beard.

Suddenly all his refuses to interact with her half of the mankind made perfect sense…


She found him on the roof, being quite surprised that she walked out the door the moment he had turned around to look at the campus.

"I think I should apologize…", she started and he turned around, anger dominating his expression.

"You just fucking told them I was shooting blanks! Actually, you told them I wasn't even shooting!" he snapped and this time she stared at her feet, not confronting him.

"I'm really sorry. I'll go down and tell Cuddy about last night, if you want me to…"

She had to wait for two seconds until a cocky grin appeared on his face, and it took real effort to replace it with the angry look.

"You just saved my ass in there by telling them I had a decreased sex drive!" he growled.

"I told Foreman to think about the side effects of Vicodin. His question made everyone assume I meant this sex drive thing. I was talking about slowing your pulse…"

"Like hell you did."

"Well… you provoked it by the 'no interest in harassing anyone' comment."

"I'll harass you the whole night for that."

"Thank God, and I thought I was the one not getting any for two days now."

She stepped closer towards him, watching him carefully.

"I really didn't want to imply anything like that. I marched in there to kill Foreman."

"Well. You did kill something. But that was Cuddy's hope of me being the spermdonor for her babies…"

"Oh, that's okay. You'll only be donating for our babies, you know."

He frowned at her theatrically.

"But I'm a genius. My genes need to be spread! The world will go stupid without!"

She burst into laughter, seeing his attempts of keeping an earnest face.

"Oh, stop being such a drama queen, Greg."

She finally closed up to him and he drew her into an embrace, slightly kissing her lips.

"If I hear anything about that in the gossip mill, I'll have my way with you in my office, blinds open. And the child will be called 'desk' after I've changed your birth controll pills to placebos", he threatened, feeling her shake in his arms when she giggled.

"I thought I'd be doing the naming… how about floor… comfortable chair… entrance door…?"

He gulped at that and then cleared his throat.

"The leg's not up for 'entrance door'", he replied hoarsly.

"Yeah, but the kid will never know that and be really proud of his or her Daddy…", she grinned.

"You suggest we lie at 'floor' he's an 'entrance door'?"

"You know, this is a very weird conversation…"

"Says the woman who has sex every night with the guy with no sex drive."

"Yeah, I know, I should get an Oscar for my performance… is there a cathegory for 'Seduce the guy with no sex drive'?"

"Don't know. Is there one for 'Make the I'm no screamer-girl scream my name'?"

She smiled at that, leaning her head against his chest, closing her arms around his waist.

"I'm really sorry I made you feel uncomfortable in there."

"Well, it got me out of this harassing stuff really fast…"

He could live with the rest.


At least he thought he could live with it.

Still he found himself really confused in front of Wilson's office.

She had made him angry. She had made him uncomfortable.

Everybody else would have been hit by his uncensored anger, declaring loudly in front of Cuddy and Foreman that he was as potent as any porn actor and shoving everybody in the face why exactly she knew that.

Instead he ran away.

Instead they were talking about children again.

"Jeez… I can't be that desperate", he murmured to himself, finding the office empty, but closing the door he started to look for his friend.

He didn't have to go far.

Wilson stepped out of a patient's room, slightly looking around as if he wanted to make sure that nobody had seen him.

House hid behind a corner and waited until his friend was gone.

When he saw the number of the room some pieces of the puzzle began to make sense again.

He didn't care to knock but silently moved into the room they had kept Cameron since yesterday.

She was awake, laying in the bed while all the blinds were closed and the light was out. Her green eyes opened slightly to identify her visitor before closing them again with a groan.

"Hey", she made silently when he didn't say anything.

"You lied to me", he stated and when she didn't do anything he could barely keep himself from repeating it louder.

"You came in after me yesterday. The test was finished the evening before", he continued.

"You came here to accuse me because I lied about being late yesterday?"

He took a seat next to her bed, sighing.

"I came here to make sure you don't do something stupid."

"Be careful. You sound like you care." She sounded bitter and he knew she had every right to do so.

He was quiet for a while.

"I do", he then said silently, making her turn around to him.

"Are you trying to find out how much more miserable you can make me?" she snapped, her eyes still small slits and he shook his head, a bit amused.

"Jeez, and Foreman thought you couldn't defend yourself against me."

"Why would I have to defend myself?" his female duckling asked confused and he growled at himself for now having to reveal what had happened.

"He reported me for sexually harassing you."

"What? How…?"

"I have no idea. I mean, you wouldn't be refusing me if I was, would you?"

She shot up from her bed at that.

"How can you…!"

Feeling dizzy she sank down again.

"You're right… maybe I wouldn't…", was the weak answer and he shook his head.

"Aw, come on. You'd let me molest you because you like me?"

"It's… I… why are you here, House?" she changed the topic and he let her.

Yet the topic he was here about was maybe just as delicate…

"What did you do that night?"

"Found some guy at a bar and took him home", came the defiant answer.

He was silent for a while not daring to ask if it was only because of him.

"What… no mocking me for being that weak, only because I can't have the great Gregory House?"

He sighed.

"I can't change that, Allison. I can't change what you feel, as well as I can't change what I feel. It's not that I don't like you. I do, and I don't care if you tell anyone because they won't believe you. It's just…"

"You love her", she finished his sentence, pulling her cover up to her chin. He nodded slowly.

"I should have jumped you the first time I saw you…"

House frowned at that. Her eyes were focused on him again, watching his confused expression through small slits.

"Oh, come on, didn't you assume we were talking about you? I was comfortable with the thought about the two of you. Hannah was my friend… and I betrayed her. I know we wouldn't have worked."

"You know…?" He was really confused by now.

"You can't hurt her. Your being you can't do that."

"But I can hurt you. I've done it and I'll do it again."

He thought about that for a while. His mouth always had been a tad faster than the part of his brain that told him that this time it was better to shut up.

"And then I was just glad that he didn't shoot you, feeling guilty as hell because I felt like that."

"Don't."

"But…"

"No. It's alright. To whom do you think I would have turned if she…" He gulped. He didn't even want to think about that.

"Voluntarily? To nobody. I already had a plan to get you off the roof if…"

Both fell silent for a while, Cameron wrapping herself into her blanket.

"What would you have said?" he asked, suddenly morbidly curious and she sent him a faint smile, telling him she just had waited for that question.

"I'd have suggested to jump with you."

House stared at her for a while and then decided that that would have effectively stopped him from jumping. Surprising himself he placed a soft kiss on her warm forehead.

"I'm sorry I can't be what you need."

"Well… how did that philosopher Jagger say… You can't always get what you want." She smiled weakly at him. House shook his head amused.

"So, about the guy in that bar… that wasn't Wilson, was it?"

"No, of course not. How can you even think…"

"He sneaked out of your room just before I arrived."

"Well… not only you like me, Dr. House. I've had visits from Chase, Wilson, some nurses and that surgeon from the second floor…"

He laughed lightly at that, lifting himself from the chair and started to leave the room. At the door he turned around to her.

"Just make sure you're careful with those guys at those bars… I've already potty-trained you and Chase, it'll be hell to work in two new guys."

Now she was confused, frowning at him with half closed eyes.

"Two…?"

"Yeah. I fired Foreman. You know how he was the last few weaks. That harassment stuff just was the last bit."

She was still frowning at him.

"You hate job interviews."

"That's why you and Chase will narrow the bunch of highly professional doctors that will be punching each other for a fellowship with me down to three. I'll take one of them then."

"So… we're doing the work…"

"Nah. I'm delegating", he grinned.

"When you're cleared for work again you'll start. Until then Chase has to live with me alone."

Cameron couldn't help but feel pity for her colleague.

His hand was already on the handle of the door when she spoke up again.

"Tell Hannah I said Hi?"

"I can send her over, so she can tell you how she saved my crippled ass by telling Cuddy and Foreman I wouldn't harass anyone because of my Vicodin-addiction", he grinned.

"By what I have heard from Hannah until now that has to be something else than a decreased sex drive", it grinned in the bed behind him and he left the room, still shaking his head about himself.

When had he started to care?