Chapter 28
Beca was preparing her things for her night shift when she heard Hailey yell her name from the other tent. Worried Beca ran into Hailey's tent thinking something was wrong.
"Hailey?" Hailey faced a laptop and turned around to look at Beca when she came in. "What's wrong?" Hailey shrugged with a smile.
"Nothing just wanted you to meet my girlfriend."
"Are you seriously calling me to meet you girlfriend?!" Hailey nodded. "Sorry Hailey I'm not in the mood for that right now. Tell your girlfriend that I will meet her when we are back home." Beca turned around and wanted to walk away.
"Beca please!" Hailey begged, she jumped up and ran to Beca before she could leave. "Please Beca, it's really important for me..." Beca sighed. "Please..." Hailey pouted tugging at Beca's arm.
"Hailey... Not today okay?" Beca looked away from Hailey's begging eyes.
"But I don't know when I can Skype with her again... She wants to thank you, personally." Hailey added before Beca could make an excuse.
"Is it really that important to you?" Hailey nodded enthusiastically. "Okay fine, but I'm not joining your sappy romantic talk!"
"Yay! And of course not, I'm only doing that when you're not around." Hailey grinned as she stuck out her tongue. She grabbed Beca's hand and pulled her in front of the laptop. She typed a message that we were ready.
"You let her wait?" Beca exclaimed giving Hailey a disapproving look. Hailey rolled her eyes.
"Uh yeah." Hailey mumbled as she pressed the call button. Hailey bit her lip nervously as she waited for her girlfriend to pick up. Hailey's girlfriend picked up and Beca immediately recognized her voice.
"Stacie?" She frowned. Then her camera went on. It was Stacie.
"Hey Beca, hi H." Stacie smiled as she waved at the both of them
"But... I thought you were with Aubrey?" Beca stammered confused. She wanted to get up since she wanted to have nothing to do with any affair Stacie was involved with, but Hailey held her down. Beca let out an irritated huff regretting all the muscle training her had put Hailey through that had made her this strong.
"I still am, I am Hailey's older sister."
"Okay now I'm confused. I thought I was going to meet your girlfriend?" Beca asked as she looked at Hailey.
"Uh yeah, maybe later. I'll give you guys a moment. See ya Stace!"
"Bye Hailey, don't die!"
"I won't!" Hailey yelled before she left the tent.
"Please get her home safe Beca..." Stacie pleaded and she had a worried look on her face. Beca had seen that look on the faces of some many people before.
"I will," she promised sincerely. "Can I ask you why I am skyping with you while I was supposed to Skype with her girlfriend?!"
"Yeah about that... It was a lie so you would come online..." Beca could feel there was something behind this but she couldn't put her finger on it.
"Why?" Then Chloe walked into Stacie's room. Beca's heart fell and her mouth went dry.
"Beca. Listen to me. Don't walk away now." Beca heard Stacie's voice but didn't listen, the only thing she could focus on was Chloe. She was so pale... She looked so breakable, so... tired. But Beca also saw a weak smile on her face. The smile that never failed to give her butterflies in her stomach.
"Hey Beca." Beca's heart broke at the sound of her voice. Stacie stood up slowly and changed places with Chloe. When Chloe sat down Beca saw even better how devastated she looked.
"Beca please don't hang up... Please let me talk to you." Beca nodded not able to speak and saw Stacie leave the room. There was a short silence before Chloe spoke up. "So, how are you?" Beca felt her stomach churn.
"Please just say, what you want to say Chloe..." she muttered trying to keep her voice calm and steady. Chloe sighed, there was the army voice again.
"I shouldn't have run away like that. I wish I could go back in time and convince you to stay. But I didn't even stay myself. I ran away and I know I should've been there for you..." Beca just stared at the screen and said nothing. "Please Beca say something" Chloe pleaded near tears. The silence was killing her and she needed Beca to say something.
"You look terrible Chloe..." Beca mumbled.
Chloe scoffed softly. "Well that was not what I hoped for but it's good to hear your voice again..." Chloe smiled weakly.
"Why didn't you answer my letters?" Chloe frowned.
"What letters?" Beca groaned. "You didn't receive them... Of course..." Beca ran a hand through her hair and looked at Chloe. She rested her head in her hands and let out a frustrated huff.
"You wrote me letters?" Beca nodded without looking up.
"Why did you hang up yesterday?" Beca looked up and saw hurt filling Chloe's eyes. Chloe was wearing Beca's favourite hoodie and her arms hugged her body as if she could fall apart any second.
"I couldn't do it Chloe. Please understand. We can't do this" Beca sighed as a tear rolled down her cheek. She was glad the webcam wasn't that good, so Chloe wouldn't notice. "And please don't apologize for running away, I don't blame you. I am the one who took this decision without talking to you about it. I know that was wrong, I know leaving you was a bad decision but please know I never meant to hurt you, ever." Chloe swallowed thickly.
"Then prove it," she whispered, "let me back into your life again and be a part of mine again." Beca shook her head.
"I can't promise something like that while I'm here, sorry." Now Chloe sighed.
"You are coming back, right?"
"I'm coming back for a while when I finish this mission. Maybe we can see what happens then..."
"I don't want to wait for you Beca. I love you..." Beca closed her eyes to stop the tears and clenched her jaw. Back home those words would have made her the happiest girl alive but now they just made everything a lot harder. Hearing someone say they love you made it harder because then she had something to go home for, something to not die for which she couldn't afford to think while in battle. Just like saying goodbye, she never said I'll see you soon because that would be a promise she couldn't afford to make. When she opened her eyes again she saw Chloe's perfect blue eyes filled with pain and red shot, probably from crying.
"It won't work Chloe... I am here, you are there..."
"I don't care where you are, I love you and that's the most important thing, right?" Beca didn't answer her question. "Why can't you say you love me back?" Chloe asked.
"Because if I do... I will give you false hope... I love you more than everything Chloe but after what happened. I'm not so sure about everything any more, my love for you is crystal clear to me but I do not know if I can do this." Chloe nodded understandingly but her chest ached again.
"I understand... Can at least speak with you sometimes? When you're still there. I just want to hear your voice once in a while..." Beca knew she shouldn't give in but she longed for the redhead as well. She, too, missed seeing her.
"Okay, if you promise me to eat better and get some more sleep okay?" Chloe nodded, ashamed of the fact that Beca had noticed.
"I'm gonna go now. I have night shift today. You have my number, just text me, call me or email me whenever you want, alright?" Beca said with reluctance because everything her body told her to stay and talk to her. Chloe nodded. "What does this say about us?"
Beca sighed. "Let's start with friends..."
"Okay..."
"Bye Chloe. We will speak soon, I promise."
"Bye Beca." Beca shut down the laptop and left the tent. She found Hailey standing outside. Just close enough to hear what Beca had said during her talk with Chloe.
"I'm sorry Beca..." She said when she saw Beca's hurt face. Beca cleared her throat and with the blink of an eye Hailey saw the pain fade away and Beca's guard was up again.
"Never do that again, Johnson." Hailey looked at the ground. Beca had never used her surname before and she knew that couldn't be a good thing...
