Im just crap for not having this up sooner but ive been banking updates instead of posting them and found it really hard to write about Derek without killing him off! Like getting run over by a bus driven by Meredith killing him so just blame Shonda for lack of updates...

But anyway heres Part 2 and all i ask is PLEASE REVIEW to show me you still care about the story!

You'll Be In My Heart

Part 2

"You didn't know…"

There was obvious delight in Ellis Grey's voice as the reality of the situation dawned. A harder light now, chilling the green eyes as she smiled triumphantly, her steps light as she moved further into his room.

"Well she really does enjoy keeping secrets from you doesn't she?"

"Who are you going on about now?"

Derek demanded his fingers going to his temple, massaging in small circles as he tried to make some sense of it all.

"My daughter. First it was her true identity and now this…"

Derek too torn in what he felt could not even find the words to argue. Part of him was bathing in the warmth, the excitement of them being together all the time. Relief that never again would either of them have to suffer the pain of Meredith being so far away.

However, another currently louder part was angry and bitter. Angry that it was Ellis Grey telling him this life changing news and not Meredith. Bitter because he couldn't even be happy when he was going to get all that he had wanted since spending that first weekend with Meredith.

"Surely this only goes to show you this charade of a relationship isn't as strong as either of you have claimed… How long will it be before you see what I've been pointing out all along?"

It was that cruel mockery in her voice that rankled his already taut nerves more than anything else did. It made him swallow the angry indignation, the hurt so he was able to defend himself, Meredith and the relationship his world centered around.

"What I and Meredith have is stronger than you can ever understand. Nothing and I mean nothing that you could ever tell me could change that!"

"Oh please grow up! Stop kidding yourself. Try thinking if Meredith hasn't told you this what else hasn't she been telling you?"

"Have you not thought it may be a surprise that she planning or something that she is still thinking through?" Derek demanded, fighting an internal war to keep his own voice steady.

"That does not sound like Meredith to me!"

"And just how well do you think you know Mer? When was the last time you bothered to really see and hear her…?"

"There's no need for me to bother. Over the years I have seen, heard and put up with enough to understand her perfectly."

"See I don't think you do, I think you don't have a clue about Mer or her life. If you did, you'd trust her to make her decisions and, to know what was right for her!"

Derek told her, his voice though still not rising was filled with emotion. No matter how angry he was with her right now Meredith was still the other half of him. Whom he would always defend and fight for every single step of the way.

"You mean you…"

Ellis snorted as she shook her head.

"Right now Meredith should be in class working towards her future, not sitting vigil at your bedside or gallivanting around New York. So no, you are the last thing Meredith needs!"

"I'm what she wants though, why cant that be enough? I make her happy and, I love her more than life itself."

Derek cried sitting forward. Wishing there was hair for him to run his agitated fingers through. However, Ellis seemed not to hear, his words shrugged away without a second thought.

"I don't care! There is absolutely no way I will ever approve of you or will sanction a transfer to NYU."

"It's not your decision."

Derek shouted grabbing for the last shreds of control but missing.

"It's not yours; it's not mine it is Meredith's! You cannot and do not get to pick and choose when to be a mother to her…"

"How dare you speak to me like that? Who on earth do you think you are?"

Ellis demanded looking angrier than Derek had ever seen. However, he had gone past the point of caring.

"I'm the one person in this room that wants what is best for Meredith. Who loves her for being her and doesn't think of her as an inconvenience!"

"Why you jumped…"

"That's enough!"

Neither of them had been aware of Miles Grants arrival until his voice bellowed from the doorway. Both however watched him shut the door with a loud bang, closing out the group of onlookers.

"I don't know what this is about and I don't care but it stops now! Dr Grey your needed down in the pit and…"

"I haven't finished."

"Yes you have."

Never had Derek seen Ellis Grey dismissed like that or seen her accept it. Watching in awe as she turned sharply on her heel and left.

Dr Grant however instead of following came to the head of his bed. Gently pushing Derek back against his pillows.

"Derek I know your not yourself but you cannot forget that she is your superior. That professionally at least she deserves your respect despite your personal issues."

Dr Grant spoke as he did a brief exam and could not help but be glad it was him not Meredith who had walked in on them.

"She does love Meredith you know. It may not seem so but deep down underneath it all she does, as much as she possibly can."

He said understanding perfectly Derek's look of doubt.

"It's not enough though, for Mer or for anyone else for that matter. Mer deserves more, so much more."

Derek sighed his hands rubbing over his face as the reason for Ellis being in his room came flooding back. With the sudden need to be alone unless it was Meredith who was here, Derek faked a yawn for the older man. It worked perfectly as he started to back out the room.

"Now you lie still and rest or you won't be going anywhere in a few days."


Sat with her legs crossed beneath her on the couch Meredith found herself again glancing uneasily around the room. In the time that it had taken, her to only tidy Derek's bedroom Addison had transformed the living room.

The cluttered, disorganised room she loved and, had always felt so at home in had disappeared. Now in its place was a room that though tidy was stripped of all the warmth, spirit and personality of the two men that lived there.

"Derek is going to hate this."

The sigh that put into words the very thoughts bouncing around her own head came from beside her. Turning Meredith watched Annie's gaze take the exact same route around the room as hers just had.

"Then he will hate me for not stopping her! Nancy he wont expect too but me I'm meant to be the sister he can rely on!"

"I'm keeping hope that any hatred will centre around Addison or, himself for being so stupid to agree to this in the first place."

Meredith told her as in search of comfort she drew her knees up to her chest. Already missing the thick fleecy throws that previously had been draped over the leather couch. Ones her and Derek had spent hours curled up beneath wrapped in each other's arms.

"I don't think I've ever been this uncomfortable in here before!"

"And that totally takes away my need to ask which version you prefer…"

"Didn't Addison tell you I'm a lost cause? Irreversibly lost to the dark side, I think that's what might have sealed the deal with Derek." Meredith laughed her smile matching the one shining in the gentle blue eyes watching her.

The more time she spent with Annie the easier it became to understand just why she was such a favourite with Derek and Mark.

It was impossible not to feel at ease in her company and, Meredith was sure she had never met anyone sweeter. It was that rare sweetness too, one that did not become too much or seem false at any point.

"I just don't get why Addie hasn't come to that conclusion about these two yet… It's not like they haven't made their feelings clear, especially Derek!"

Annie's comments drew her attention from her own thoughts and towards the noise coming from Mark's bedroom. Where Addison was continuing to take full advantage of the opportunity Derek had handed her.

"Now Mark's reaction is one I'd pay to see!"

Meredith murmured a smile tugging at her lips.

"Maybe I should offer to help, point them in the direction of where he hides everything he doesn't want Addison to see?"

The mischief dancing in the green eyes made it impossible for Annie not to laugh. A roguish sense of humour that could only attract both her brothers and for her it was what all his previous girlfriends had been missing.

Unlike Mark, Derek did not need someone to settle him down just the opposite in fact. Derek, he needed someone to give him a life outside the hospital, to stop his career becoming his whole world.

"You wouldn't…"

"Probably not but it is tempting, especially after last night!"

Meredith said remembering how he had gone out of his way to wind her up. With Derek in the middle doing his best to placate her whilst telling Mark to shut up.

"He can be an ass but..."

"He's a loveable one."

Meredith finished off for her

"I know it's a trait he shares with Derek."

"Look, lets leave them to it, we can go pick up some lunch then head back to the hospital… Maybe plead our innocence?"

Annie suggested and Meredith nodded, wanting nothing more than to see Derek.

"I'd like that."


Alone with the door to his room shut Derek stared blindly up at the tiled ceiling above him. Doing his best to not let the burning anger directed at both, the Grey women in his life consume him. Not now, not when what he needed most was a clear head.

With a groan, he rubbed his hands up over his face and forced himself to concentrate with both his head and heart on Meredith. He knew her, inside out, better than he had ever known anyone and her telling her mother about a transfer before him did not make sense.

If she had gone to Molly, Elliot or even Mark he would have found it easier to grasp. Understanding that she had felt the need to talk it through with someone who though cared about them was not as invested. However that wasn't her mother and, nor did they have that relationship. They weren't able to talk things through not without it ending in an argument. An argument that would leave Meredith distracted, withdrawn and fragile. It was that very thought that had everything slowly falling into place.

Last week the two had fallen out but Meredith had refused to talk about it and now he knew why. She'd said it was nothing, just her mother being Ellis Grey and because he'd already been concerned about her he'd let it go. Now though as he thought it all over, he would bet his life on that being when Meredith had told her the news. He doubted it was because she wanted too; more simply that it had been on her mind. Whoever had pushed Meredith too far that day would have probably heard it and it just happened to be Ellis Grey.

The sound of the door opening had the effect of snapping him from his thoughts and his head turning in the direction of the door. Relief coursing through him when he saw it was Mark and not his parents as he expected.

"The Chief just saved me from being torn apart by the dragon only to send me up here to baby-sit you… Any ideas why?"

"He walked in on a disagreement we were having." Derek admitted as he began to sit up only for Mark to stop him.

"Lie down you look like crap! So what happened this time or is it just another I hate Derek Shepherd day?"

Mark asked as with an amused smile he shook his head.

"God can you imagine what she'll do when you and kiddo marry… I'd lay money on a ten blade doing you some serious damage before you get to I do!"

For a brief moment, Derek was able to forget everything as Mark's words sank in. Just like him, Mark now took for granted that marriage was where he and Meredith were ultimately heading. That everything about them was on a forever basis.

In his own mind he saw them happily married living in a home he had had built especially for her with their family around them. Though the finer details changed perhaps weekly what never did was the woman he shared it with.

"Hell I should have known not to bring marriage and kiddo up in the same breath! You've already got that sappy, I picking out the china look on your face…"

"I wasn't and haven't!" Derek argued his words belied by the flush staining his cheeks as Mark smirked knowingly.

"Oh yes you were you can't lie to me Shep you should know that by now… Anyway are you going to tell me what this shouting match was about or should I just wait to hear it from one of the nurses…?"

"Mer has told her she plans to transfer to NYU."

"Seriously?"

The excitement in Mark's voice and the happiness in his smile made him look like a child on Christmas morning. There was no faking that emotion and it was what he wanted to be free to feel.

"God that's the best news I've heard in ages!"

"It is." Derek nodded and immediately Mark's whole demeanour changed.

"Then why the hell don't you seem happy about it? This is you finally getting what you have wanted from day one, what you've been dreaming about…?"

"I know but up until twenty minutes ago I had no idea about any of it! The only reason I even know now is because Ellis Grey is pissed and determined to not let it happen!"

Derek told him as Mark began to look even more confused.

"Oh."

"You remember that row last week this is what it must have been about."

Derek said as his eyes closed. His fingers massaging over his now throbbing temple.

"The more I think about it the more it makes sense!"

"But why did kiddo tell her? She could have come to any of us if she had needed to talk…"

Mark voiced one of his own thoughts as he leaned forward in the chair before coming to the same conclusion Derek had.

"Unless… she didn't mean to tell her! Mer was an emotional wreck last week and…"

"Exactly!" Derek nodded not surprised in anyway at just how well Mark had come to know Meredith. How with comparative ease she had not just stole his heart but his brothers too.

"But then why the hell are you pissed?"

"I'm not or if I am it's because not once since they fell out has Mer mentioned any of this. It's huge and the last person I wanted to hear about it from was her damn mother!"


Walking beside Meredith Annie watched the way her shoulders slowly began to relax the closer they got to Derek's room. From the moment, the lobby doors had slid shut behind them she had seen and felt Meredith's whole stance change. How her grip on the carrier bag containing the food she'd insisted on bringing for Derek had visibly tightened.

"You really do hate hospitals don't you? That cant make dating Derek easy…"

"Weirdly when it comes to your brother a lot of things I once thought I couldn't do are somehow easier."

Meredith murmured as her lips relaxed into a thoughtful smile. Not just thinking of how she felt about hospitals but their whole relationship altogether. There was no one else she could imagine herself in so deep with or ever feel so entirely committed too. Let alone ever cause her to consider picking up her whole life and move to be closer to him.

"You two are good forone another, it's obvious to anyone who takes the time to look."

"Well thank you that makes two of you who have given me their sisterly seals of approval today!"

"And as we're his favourites that's all you really need!"

Annie told her and looking into the laughing blue eyes, Meredith saw the first real resemblance between her and Derek. That teasing light that right from the start she had found so irresistible in him was now radiating from Annie and she couldn't stop her smile.

"I wish Derek had told me that earlier and I would have never bothered with Mark,"

"Now that's a lie you adore him, you said yourself earlier he's loveable."

Annie laughed only for it to quickly turn into a frown. Meredith who had started off laughing with her was now looking right past her. Turning to see what was holding her captive she saw Meredith's mother arguing heatedly with a man she was sure was the Chief of Surgery.

"What's that about?"

"I don't know…" Meredith said a little surprised by the sight of them like this. Though the affair between them had burnt out years ago, they had managed to stay close. Or as close as anyone could ever get to her mother.

"A case maybe?"

Annie suggested looking around noticing for the first time the other hospital staff who were trying to look like they weren't watching.

"This isn't about medicine…"

Meredith said more to herself but sure of being the truth. She had sat through enough of those discussions to recognise the signs of one and this was far from it.

"Should we…?" Annie started but was cut off by Meredith grabbing hold of her hand and pulling her off down the hall.

"No we definitely shouldn't! I am in too good a mood to have whatever is bothering her laid at my feet!"

The moment she stepped inside Derek's room Meredith felt the tension radiating from him. Her own good mood slipping away as he attempted a smile that did not come close to reaching his eyes. To anyone else it may have looked like a perfectly normal Derek smile but she knew different. For her it was the biggest warning sign she could have been given.

Since that first time in the lobby, a smile from Derek had always centred on the eyes. Now though instead of that softening and love she would come to expect she was met with a pair of dark, stormy far from happy blue eyes.

"What is it, what's wrong?"

She demanded moving to the head of the bed. Completely ignoring Mark's presence as well as forgetting Annie who had followed her into the room.

Looking up at her from his place propped up against the pillows Derek read the worry and ever-growing confusion in her expression. It caused him to have to fight the urge to pull her into his arms. Forget all his own feelings so that he could stop her believing the worst.

The anger that had been so prominent earlier he had never expected to last. Expiernce of loving Meredith had taught that it was impossible to stay that way for long. He had spent the last twenty minutes trying to explain himself to Mark. Explain why her not coming to him after she had told her mother affected him so badly. However, Mrk had been firmly in camp Meredith and anger had made way for bitterness.

"Tell me."

Her voice this time was louder. Containing more emotion as she stamped her foot in frustration at the heavy silence that she had been met with.

"It's nothing. Really Mer it's nothing!" Derek insisted his voice low. Unable top hold himself back from her any longer. Pulling her down beside him, Derek was surprised that it was she out of the two of them that stayed tense.

"Your lying and really badly!"

"It's nothing a well aimed slap wouldn't fix kiddo…" Mark speaking for the first time bent to place a kiss to her forehead.

"Shep's being Shep, an ass! Refusing to listen to what he knows is right and rational!"

"About what?"

Turning away from Derek for the first time since she'd come into the room Meredith glanced up at Mark.

"Something that…"

"Shut up."

Realising just in time what Mark was about to do Derek quickly interrupted him. Anger flashing over his features and strengthing his voice.

"And if you cant then just go, Take Annie to…"

However, he was interrupted this time. A small sweet smelling hand covering his mouth.

"No! He doesn't have to shut up or leave… Carry on Mark."

Annie feeling like a complete outsider watched her two brothers as Mark visibly hesitated. Saw the silent but unreadable messages being sent back and forth between the two pairs of vastly different blue eyes.

Meredith she thought must have seen the very same thing as her other hand moved up to cover Derek's eyes. Showing Annie exactly who was in charge as Derek's protests were silenced quickly.

"Mark Jeremy Sloane if you don't start speaking then I will go to the nearest phone and ring Addie. Not only to tell her where you keep your stash of porn but to give her directions to the exact location of your address book. The one with all your past conquest phone numbers, ratings out of five stars and brief descriptions of each one…"

Mark felt himself pale. Well aware that in no way was this an empty threat. In this current mood, Meredith was just as formidable as her mother was.

"Blackmail kiddo?"

Met with only a stony expression he sighed in defeat.

"I've no choice man… Mer what does your dragon of a mother know that Derek didn't about any future possible plans you might have?"

"Oh."

Meredith's hands dropped from Derek's face as the full meaning of Mark's words sank in. Relief for the moment making her weak as her brain chose to concentrate on her being relieved of her worst fear. That something in the past few hours had caused Derek's condition a set back therefore bringing that look to his face. However, the feeling of weakness did not last long before being replaced by something entirely different.

"Is that it?"

Meredith did not give Derek a chance to answer as her hands clenched into tight fists. Anger surging through her as it became impossible to think of anything but the last few minutes of worry he had caused.

"My god Derek Shepherd you are an ass! I thought something serious had happened…"

Meredith cried out as her fists connected hard with his chest and shoulders. Managing even in her anger to be careful enough to avoid the areas from the crash that still caused him the most pain.

Mark watched in amusement as Derek struggled between trying to protect himself whilst still attempting to calm Meredith. Smirking at Annie who looked torn between laughing and going to her brother's aid before he caught hold of Meredith's arms.

"I didn't mean it quite so literally Kiddo." He laughed as she continued to struggle against his hold.

This side of Meredith, the fiery volatile one was probably what he loved most about her. It always made winding her up all that more worthwhile. However, despite all his efforts he never got reactions like this. This anger, Derek only ever evoked in her and according to Addison was the other side of the intense connection they shared.

"I'm sorry for scaring you Mer but that doesn't mean you get to make me the one in the wrong!"

Derek told her rubbing his now tender shoulder. Not for the first time impressed by the damage, her tiny fists could cause. Or by just how beautiful she looked flushed like this. Green eyes alight with fire, as scorching and emotion filled, as her mother's anger was cold and detached.

"Not when again I had to hear about something vital to the two of us from your damn mother! To have her use it to demean everything we have…"

There was not any need for him to say more or go into any further detail. She knew exactly what today had reminded him off or how her mother had treated him. Guilt for the first time really surfacing.

"I didn't expect her to come to you whilst you were still under Uncle Miles care. I thought I had more time but, obviously not…"

Sighing Meredith shook off Mark's now slack hold as she reached out to Derek. A gesture he could not refuse. They may not be on the same page right now but it was not as if they could not get through it. His hand turning over underneath hers Derek actively returned her touch.

"More time. More time for what Mer?"

"To make some kind of real plan, put it into action before she decided how she was going to trample all over it!"

"But that doesn't explain why you didn't come to me?"

The hurt in his voice could not be ignored and she was glad of the respite as Annie took the opportunity to interrupt.

"We're going to go… Find Mom and Dad or something and leave you two to either murder each or have sex!"

"We are? Personally for either of those options id like to stay and watch…"

Mark said forcing Annie to nearly drag him from the room.

"You're a spoilsport Annie Shepherd-Sinclair!"

"I didn't want you to get your hopes up in case it all fell through. That's one of the reasons I hadn't told you…"

Meredith having waited for the door to close behind Mark and Annie let the words out in a rush. At the same time, she raised her head to find him waiting patiently for her to continue.

"The other, it's the promise you made before the accident. That wonderful and very Dereky promise to fix the distance problem, which with consideration could lead you to do something stupid. You see if NYU fell through you would get it in your head to transfer and I do not want that. It is not right; it would be just… stupidly honourable and wrong. So very wrong and I refuse to have you do that for me!"

"Mer," Derek started but was stopped before he could get any further.

"No don't argue with me! You want a future in Neuro. You deserve a huge, great, world-renowned future and it is what I want for you more than anything. But, for that you need to be around the best and that is here with Uncle Miles."

She paused only to take a breath and Derek had no choice but to go on listening.

"So it's me, I have to be the one to make the move. And if NYU can't take me then we'll look at other schools."

"Other schools?"

Derek breathed, the surprise he felt evident in his voice. Warmth filling every cold place Ellis Grey's harsh words had caused.

"Of course why wouldn't …"

Meredith began only to come to a sudden stop.

"Oh… She made you doubt me didn't she?"

"No!"

Taking hold of her chin Derek forced her head back up so she would look at him. Deciding quickly the only way to go was honesty or as honest as he could be without hurting her.

"But she made me doubt me."

"Really?"

Meredith asked with a perfectly sceptically raised eyebrow. Done in such a way he knew both Addison and Nancy would have been proud of her for. Convincing him even further that there was no need for anymore girl bonding days in the future.

"Yes,"

He breathed, wanting only to pull her into his arms but, still Meredith held back. She saw guilt in the blue eyes and Meredith knew she could not let it go. If any doubt at all was left to linger, to fester then it could only harm them in the future. Be there waiting for her mother to build on and take advantage of.

"So not even for a second did u wonder if anything had really changed from you finding out whom I was and that I had kept it from you?"

"I…"

There was a second when he considered lying but he dispelled the thought quickly.

"I'm sorry… But it was only a moment, not even a whole one just that millisecond."

Derek tried to explain but again Meredith stopped him with a simple shake of her head. Her hand moving up on its own accord to stroke his pale face.

"I get it; I've lived with it all my life. That is what she does; it is how she makes people bend to her will. She finds their weaknesses and exploits them until that person doubts everything around them. Your obvious weakness is me, so she'll use that whenever she can…"

"You're really not even a little pissed?" He questioned seeing the answer in the teasing smile tugging at the corner of her mouth.

"Do you want me to be?"

"No." He answered promptly

"I know you didn't purposefully tell her either."

"I'd have been pissed if you hadn't known that."

Meredith sighed as her forehead came to rest against hers. Blue eyes now near normal, soft, warm with a love that she knew was mirrored in her own.

"She's going to try every trick to stop you Mer,"

"I know. I'll be ready for her though."

"She'll play dirty…"

"And so will I, I am her daughter after all and I'll fight her every step of the way!"

"For us."

"For us! I need you, we need each other and she'll not change that… Its something she'll have to learn to understand."

Don't listen to them
Cos what do they know?
We need each other
To have, to hold
They'll see in time

So thats that? Oh and a question would you rather have shorter and more regular updates or stick with the longer ones? Please review and let me know?